The Emperor's New School (2006–2008): Season 1, Episode 4 - Hungry, Hungry Llama/Only the Wrong Survive - full transcript

[I- Hungry, Hungry Llama] Now Mr. Moleguaco is sick of Kuzco's ludicrous excuses that his homework was eaten by all kinds of beasts, Malina convinces him he must actually do the work, for the first time. Yzma turns Kronk into a llama to really eat it. [II- Only the Wrong Survive] The class is sent to three survival scenes. Kuzco, Kronk and Malina, who refuses to cheat, get the tough jungle, but Kuzco decides to use an imperial emergency shelter cave.

HEY, MY ROYAL
TV-WATCHING SUBJECTS,

TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY.
WANNA KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE YOU GET TO WATCH
MY SHOW, STARRING...ME.

THEME MUSIC.

[♪♪]

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY
TO THE THRONE ♪

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY
TO SUCCESS ♪

♪ BUT HE HAS
TO GO TO SCHOOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO ACE
THAT TEST ♪

♪ HE'S AN EMPEROR-TO-BE ♪

♪ AND HE'S TOTALLY ♪



YOU KNOW, IT'S
ALL ABOUT ME.
♪ AHH ♪

EXACTLY!

LET'S GO!

♪ HE'S GOING
TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO LEARN ♪

♪ HIS ABCs ♪

♪ DON'T TRY
TO STOP HIM ♪

♪ TO TOP HIM ♪
TO DESTROY HIM,

RIGHT?
UHH...

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO!
GO, GO!

♪ HE'S GOT THE COOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE CHARM
AND THE LOOKS ♪



♪ AND A HOTTIE
THAT CAN HELP HIM ♪

♪ READ THAT THING
CALLED BOOK ♪

♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOING
TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ COME ON,
KUZCO ♪

♪ GOT TO FULFILL
HIS DESTINY ♪

♪ HIS FRIENDS ARE LOYAL,
IT'S ROYAL ♪

♪ THEY'LL HELP
AGAINST THE FOIL ♪

FRIENDS? I THOUGHT THIS
WAS ALL ABOUT ME.

HEH HEH!
SPELL MY NAME AGAIN!

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO! GO, GO!

[GULP]

[GROWLING]

HANG ON,
CHINCHILLA THING!

I, KUZCO, WILL SAVE YOU.

YOU BE MORE CAREFUL
FROM NOW ON, LITTLE FELLA.

OK? BYE-BYE.

SO LONG. ADIOS.

[GROWLING]

HEY! MY HOMEWORK!

LOOK, PAL, I WORKED
REALLY HARD ON THAT

ALL NIGHT.
AND IT'S DUE TODAY.

SO GATOR
GIVES IT BACK.

[GULP]

[BURP]
Mr. Mulaguako:
STOP!

PLEASE STOP!

DON'T...
SAY ANOTHER WORD!

BUT I DIDN'T
GET TO THE PART
WITH MY HEROES PARADE.

[HUMS VICTORY MARCH]

YOU DON'T HAVE
YOUR HOMEWORK

WHAT?
BECAUSE
YOU DIDN'T DO
YOUR HOMEWORK.

WHAT? YOU DON'T
BELIEVE ME?

NOBODY BELIEVES YOU!

DOES ANYONE
BELIEVE HIM?

I BELIEVE THAT HE...

SAW... A CHINCHILLA.

BUT...

BUT HE'S NEVER
DONE HIS HOMEWORK...

EVEN ONCE.

THE PEOPLE HAVE
SPOKEN, KUZCO.

WE'RE TIRED OF
HEARING WHAT ATE
YOUR HOMEWORK.

BUT NO MORE.

NO MORE ALLIGATORS
EATING YOUR HOMEWORK.

NO MORE LIONS
OR TIGERS OR BEARS!

OH, MY.

BUT THOSE ALL HAPPENED.

TOMORROW YOU MUST
HAVE YOUR HOMEWORK.

NO EXCUSES.

ANY EXCUSE...
YOU FAIL.

"ANY EXCUSE, YOU FAIL."

"ANY EXCUSE, YOU FAIL."

I BET HE WOULDN'T SAY THAT
IF I ACTUALLYDID MY HOMEWORK.

[WHISTLES] WAIT A MINUTE!

NAH.

HEH HEH HEH! DID YOU
HEAR THAT, KRONK?

YEAH. THAT WAS
THE WORST MR. MULAGUAKO
IMPERSONATION I'VE EVER HEARD.

NO, YOU FOOL.
ABOUT HIS HOMEWORK.

TO THE SECRET LAB!

[CHITTERING]

[CHITTERING]

PULL THE LEVER, KRONK.

OHH...

OTHER LEVER, MAYBE?

DO NOT PULL DOWN
ON THE SAFETY BAR.

I WILL LOWER IT FOR YOU.

COOL.

AAH!
YEOWWW!

YAAAYYY!

[WHEELS SCREECHING]

OHHH! WHERE'D
I PUT THE TICKET?

WHERE IS
THAT TICKET?

IT'S IN THE GLOVE
COMPARTMENT.

WE ALWAYS PUT IT
IN THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT.

[DING]

[CHUCKLES
MALICIOUSLY]

TOMORROW MORNING,
KUZCO WILL HAVE

THE MOST UNBELIEVABLE
HOMEWORK EXCUSE EVER!

HA HA HA HA HA HA!

FIRST, I'LL TURN YOU
INTO A LLAMA.

THEN YOU'LL FIND
KUZCO'S HOMEWORK...
HA HA!

...AND EAT IT.

[GULP]

IT'S BRILLIANT,
BRILLIANT, BRILLIANT!

AND IT'S A STRAIGHT
A-TO-B KIND OF PLAN, TOO.
THAT'S NEW FOR YOU.

BUT, UH...

"BUT"? "BUT, BUT,
BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT,

BUT" WHAT?!

WELL,
IT'S JUST...

A LLAMA.

THAT SEEMS SO,
YOU KNOW, BEEN
THERE, DONE THAT.

WELL, WHAT WOULDYOU
SUGGEST, HMM?

OH, I DON'T KNOW. BUT...
"A LLAMA ATE MY HOMEWORK"?

THAT'S GOTTA BE
THE OLDEST EXCUSE
IN THE BOOK.

PRECISELY. HEH HEH.

THAT IS WHAT MAKES IT

SO PERFECTLY
UNBELIEVABLE.

RIGHT. THE REVERSE TWIST

ON THE WHOLE
HOMEWORK EXCUSE THING.

OH...I'D HATE
TO PEEK INYOUR HEAD

AND SEE HOW
YOUR MIND WORKS.

LIKEWISE.

HA HA! NOW...
GET READY, KRONK.

[GULP]

WEIRD.

NOW, GO!

AH, HA HA HA!

THERE'S HOMEWORK
TO EAT.

TYING KNOTS
IS STUPID HOMEWORK.

WHEN AM I EVER
GONNA HAVE TO TIE

5 DIFFERENT KINDS
OF KNOTS?

HEY, WHAT'D YOU GET
FOR NUMBER 3?

LLAMA MAN'S
OVERHAND HALF HITCH?

HMHH!

OH, IT'S GREAT
TO SEE YOU

TAKIN' AN INTEREST
IN YOUR SCHOOLWORK.

KNOT TYING
IS A BASIC SKILL

ALL LLAMA HERDERS
NEED TO KNOW.

HEY, NO SNEAKY.
SNEAKY NO LIKIE.

HOWEVER, I DON'T
THINK IT COUNTS

TO COPY FROM CHAKA.

COPY NO LIKIE.

BUT MR. GUACAMOLE'S
GONNA FAIL ME!

YEAH, I HEARD
ABOUT THAT.

THE NERVE OF THAT GUY
GIVIN' YOU HOMEWORK.

WHO'S HE THINK HE IS,
A TEACHER?

FINALLY SOMEBODY UNDERSTANDS!

OH. HA, HA.

DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE
SUCH A COMEDIAN.

TIME FOR KUZCO'S DOODLES.

THAT'S THE PART
OF THE SHOW

WHERE PACHA
IS A COMEDIAN.

OK, THIS IS PACHA,
AND HE'S SAYING...

LOOK AT ME. I'M PACHA,
AND I'M SO FUNNY.

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.
THIS IS MY FUNNY WAY

OF THINKIN' I'M FUNNY.
COPY NO LIKIE. BLAH, BLAH.

Kuzco: THEN, KIDS,
A MAGIC CIRCLE

FORMED AROUND
PACHA'S FEET.

Pacha: OH, NO!
IT'S A HOLE!

Kuzco: AND HE FELL DOWN IT,
AND HE DESERVED IT

FOR NOT BEING FUNNY.

THE END.

HA HA. I'M FUNNY.

YEAH, YEAH. I KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE THINKING.

BUT YOU GOTTA SEE THIS
FROMMY POINT OF VIEW.

MULAGUAKO SAID
HE WANTED HOMEWORK,
NO EXCUSES.

HE DIDN'T SAY
I HAD TO ACTUALLY DO
THE HOMEWORK MYSELF.

OF COURSE,
MAYBE HE THOUGHT THAT
WENT WITHOUT SAYING.

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
HE SHOULD'VE SAID,

"AND NO TAKING
SOMEONE ELSE'S
HOMEWORK."

BUT HE DIDN'T. SO...

THERE.

[SLURPS]

WHAT?!

AAH!

NO. NO!

HANHH. A LLAMA
ATE MY HOMEWORK.

COME BACK!
COME BACK!
COME BACK!

KUZCO?

A LLAMA
ATE MY HOMEWORK.

OHHH...KUZCO!

HELLO! SLOW DOWN
THERE, YOUNG PUP!

WHERE ARE YOU GOIN'
IN SUCH A HURRY?

A LLAMA ATE MY HOMEWORK!

OH, THAT'S
THE OLDEST EXCUSE
IN THE BOOK.

WHAT BOOK?

THIS ONE.
HA HA HA HA HA!

HAH HAH HAH!

HEY, WHERE'D HE GO?

[CLOPPING FADES AWAY]

HUH. MY BUTT'S
IN AN URN.

KUZCO! [PANTING]

HAVEN'T YOU LEARNED YET
THAT ACTUALLY
DOING YOUR HOMEWORK

WOULD BE EASIER
THAN ALL THIS?

WHAT? LOOK,
IDID MY HOMEWORK.

BUT A LLAMA ATE IT!

OHH! YEAH, RIGHT.

THAT'S JUST
THE OLDEST EXCUSE
IN THE--WHOA.

HOLD UP.
YOU DID YOUR HOMEWORK?

UH, THE HOMEWORK
I WILL BE TURNING IN

HAS BEEN COMPLETED.
YES.

[GASPS] YOU STOLE
CHACA'S HOMEWORK!

GEE, HOW
DO YOU KNOW?

WHAT WAS
THE TIP-OFF? DID
MY EYE TWITCH?

KUZCO, I WANT YOU
TO GRADUATE AND
BECOME EMPEROR.

AND I WANT
TO HELP YOU OUT.
GOODY!

BUT IF YOU FAKE
YOUR HOMEWORK,

YOU ONLY
FAKE GRADUATE.

AND THEN YOU'LL BE
A FAKE EMPEROR.

AND, UH--

JUST DO YOUR HOMEWORK.
IT'S NOT THAT HARD.

BUT...[SIGHS]

I'M THROUGH.
THAT'S IT.

THINGS OFFICIALLY
CANNOT GET WORSE.

SO, I WENT
TO CHECK OVER

CHACA AND TIPO'S
HOMEWORK,
LIKE ALWAYS,

AND GUESS WHAT
I FIND MISSING.

I CAN EXPLAIN.

AND DON'T TELL ME
A LION OR A TIGER
OR A BEAR ATE IT.

ACTUALLY, IT WAS A LLAMA.

I DON'T WANT
ANY LIP, KUZCO.

YOU'RE DOIN' YOUR HOMEWORK
AND CHACA'S TOO,

SINCE YOU LOST HERS.

[YAWNING]
NO, THAT'S OK.

I ALWAYS SAVE A BACKUP.

GOOD NIGHT.

KRONK! THIS IS
THE WRONG HOMEWORK!

LOOK AT THE NAME!

"CHACA'S HOMEWORK."

AH. SO THAT'S
HER LAST NAME.

THE HOMEWORK FAMILY.
BOY, THAT'S WEIRD.

[THUD]

SNEAK, SNEAK, SNEAK,
STOP.

WOWIE, YZMA
SURE HAS GOT A TEMPER.

TIPTOE, TIPTOE, TIPTOE,
HIDE.

I SHOULD REPORT HER
TO PRINCIPAL LAMBSIE.

LOOKIE LEFT, LOOKIE RIGHT.

Kuzco:
AND...DONE.

THERE. WASN'T THAT EASIER

THAN CHASING A LLAMA
ALL OVER TOWN?

YEAH. MAYBE ACTUALLY
DOING MY HOMEWORK
WASN'T SO BAD.

BUT DON'T TELL ANYBODY
I ACTUALLY SAID THAT.

[SLURPING]

UHH! NO! PACHA!
IT'S THE LLAMA!

UNHH! UHH! UHH!

HI THERE.
CHECK THIS OUT.

NOW, I WON'T PRETEND
TO UNDERSTAND

ALL THE SCIENTIFIC
THING-A-MA-DEALIES
ON WHAT HAPPENS NEXT,

BUT, YOU KNOW,
I HAD WORKED SO HARD
ON THAT HOMEWORK,

AND TO SEE IT
YANKED AWAY...

[SNIFFLES] WELL,
IT MADE MY HEART

GROW 3 SIZES
THAT DAY.

[CRASH]

AND GAVE ME
SUPERHUMAN STRENGTH!

TIME TO TURN IN
MY HOMEWORK.

SUPERHUMAN STRENGTH?

PLEASE,
JUST STOP TALKING!

I SAID
NO MORE EXCUSES!

YOU DON'T HAVE
YOUR HOMEWORK,
SO YOU FAIL.

BUT, MR. MULAGUAKO,
KUZCO DOES HAVE
HIS HOMEWORK. LOOK.

YES.

[CHUCKLES]
YES, HE DID IT.

IN FACT, YOUR
LLAMA MAN'S

OVERHAND
HALF HITCH

IS ABSOLUTELY
SUBLIME.

AND--AND
JUST LOOK AT
THE GOOSENECK

ON YOUR
BACKWARD BEND
BUTTERFLY KNOT.

EXCELLENT
ROPE WORK,
MR. KUZCO!

YOU PASS!

WHOA. THAT WORE OFF

A LITTLE FASTER
THAN EXPECTED. UH...

EMBARRASSING.

Kid's voices:
K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO'SNEW SCHOOL!
GO! GO!

[WILD ANIMALS CHITTERING]

MODERN CONVENIENCES
LIKE CHAIRS
AND PILLOWS

AND MEDICINE MEN
HAVE MADE US SOFT
AND WEAK.

THAT IS WHY
SURVIVAL CLASS
IS SO IMPORTANT.

TODAY, SOME
OF YOUR CLASSMATES

ARE LEARNING
UNDERWATER SURVIVAL.

OTHERS...
LAVA SURVIVAL.

[LAVA BURBLES]

BUTYOUR GROUP
WILL TACKLE
JUNGLE SURVIVAL.

CAN WE TAKE
OUR BLINDFOLDS OFF NOW?

NO. I HAVEN'T FINISHED
MY SPEECH.

I'M SURE YOU'VE HEARD
RUMORS ABOUT THIS...

HOW YOU'LL BE STRANDED
WITHOUT FOOD OR WATER,

HOW YOU'LL HAVE TO FEND
FOR YOURSELVES

AND LIVE OFF THE LAND
FOR 24 HOURS.

CAN WE TAKE THEM
OFF NOW?
YEAH. MINE ITCHES.

NO, NOT YET.
WELL, THOSE RUMORS

ARE 100%...TRUE.

WELCOME...

TO THE JUNGLE!

[WILD ANIMAL CALLS]

OK, NOW.

TAKE THEM
OFF NOW.

WEARE IN THE JUNGLE.

GOOD CALL.

YEAH. MR. M.,
THIS SURVIVE STUFF...

COULD YOU BE
MORE SPECIFIC?

THE THREE OF YOU
MUST WORK TOGETHER

AND USE
YOUR COMMON SENSE
AND INSTINCT TO SURVIVE.

OH, OK.

ACTUALLY,
MORE SPECIFIC
THAN THAT.

KUZCO, OUR ANCESTORS
LIVED OFF THE LAND

FOR THOUSANDS
OF YEARS.
IT'S EASY.

AAHH! HA HA!
FILTHY BEAST!

SHOO! SHOO!
[CHITTERING]

SO, ARE YOU GONNA
STAY OUT HERE, TOO,
MR. MULAGUAKO?

ME? NO. THERE'S
A FACULTY COSTUME
PARTY TONIGHT.

I'M GOING
AS A JUNGLE EXPLORER.

ANYWAY, GOOD LUCK.
SEE YOU TOMORROW.

[BIRD SHRIEKS]

HE'S NOT LEAVIN'
US HERE, IS HE?

YEP. WE'RE ON OUR OWN.

NO, WE'RE NOT.

UH...YEAH, WE ARE.

NO, WE'RE NOT.

UH, YES, WE ARE!

MR. M. JUST SAID THAT.

WHAT, DID YOU FORGET
TO WIND YOUR BRAIN AGAIN?

MY MOM SAYS PEOPLE
DEAL WITH STRESS
IN 3 STAGES.

I GUESS HE'S
IN THE FIRST STAGE--
DENIAL.

AAH! AAH! AAH! AAH!

WE'RE DOOMED!

YUP. THAT'S
STAGE 2--PANIC.

AH. IT'S NOT SO BAD.

AND STAGE 3--
ACCEPTANCE.

OK, KRONK,
WHY DON'T WE SEE

IF YOU CAN FIND
SOME WATER.

HAPPY TO.

HEY, WAIT A SEC.

I'M A JUNIOR CHIPMUNK
TROOP LEADER.

I KNOW ALL ABOUT SURVIVAL.
WHY WAS I SO WORRIED?

HA HA HA!

WEIRD.

YOU GONNA STRESS OUT,
TOO, KUZCO?

ME? NO WAY.

ME NO STRESSIE.
MATTER OF FACT,

I AM MR. JUNGLE SURVIVAL.

ME AND THE JUNGLE,
WE GET ALONG LIKE...

LIKE...

[PEACOCK CALLS]

I CAN'T THINK
OF A "LIKE" THING
RIGHT NOW,

BUT THE IDEA
IS THAT I LIKE

DENSE UNDERGROWTH
AND TANGLED VEGETATION.

YOU LIKE THE JUNGLE?
SINCE WHEN?

SINCE ALWAYS.

I'M MORE OUTDOORSY-ISH
THAN YOU THINK.

RIGHT, BUCKY?

OH! HE'S EATING ME!
DEMON SQUIRREL!

GET IT OFF!
GET IT OFF!
GET IT OFF!

[CHITTERING]

[CHUCKLES EMBARRASSEDLY]
NOW...WHERE WAS I?

RIGHT. KUZCO,
WHY DON'T YOU--

GO FIND SOME WOOD
FOR A FIRE?

YES. BUT
WHY ARE YOU--

VOLUNTEERING TO HELP?
I KNOW.

SOMETIMES HELPING
ISN'T MY THING.

MAYBE MR. M. WAS RIGHT.

I JUST HAVE TO USE
MY COMMON, UH...

SENSE?

YEAH. THAT'S IT.

ARE YOU SURE
THOSE KNOTS
WILL HOLD?

OF COURSE.

I LEARNED TO TIE KNOTS

DURING JUNIOR CHIPMUNKS
YEAR ONE.

UH, LLAMA MAN'S
OVERHAND HALF HITCH,

BACKWARD BEND
BUTTERFLY KNOT...

I MIGHT BE A...
LITTLE RUSTY,
THOUGH.

AND KNOTS AREN'T
MY STRONG POINT.

SO. LOOKS LIKE YOU
COULD USE SOME ROPE.

WHERE'D YOU GET
ALL THAT?

I FOUND IT
IN THE JUNGLE.

YOU FOUND PILLOWS
IN THE JUNGLE?

OH, YOU BET.
THEY'RE EVERYWHERE.

JUNGLE PILLOWS
ARE SOFT.

THIS STUFF
COULDN'T HAVE COME
FROM THE JUNGLE.

YOU'RE LYING.

HEY, WHAT DO
WE REALLY KNOW

ABOUT JUNGLES
ANYWAY, PEOPLE?

MAYBE THESE FELL
OFF A PILLOW TREE, HMM?
THINK OF THAT?

YOU KNOW, JUST LIKE FRUIT?
EXCEPT PILLOWS?

UH...WRONG.
WHERE'D YOU GET
THIS STUFF?

I HAVE NEVER BEEN
SO INSULTED IN MY LIFE!

I TRY TO HELP YOU,
AND THIS IS
THE THANKS I GET?

I CAN SEE THAT YOU
DON'T WANT MY HELP, SO...

YOU STAY
ONYOUR SIDE
OF THE JUNGLE,

AND I'LL STAY
ON MINE.

WHOA.
HE'S REALLY UPSET.

MAYBE WE SHOULD GET
HIM A FRUIT BASKET.

ALL WE NEED IS
SOME FRUIT.

AND A BASKET.

HE'S NOT UPSET.
HE'S HIDING SOMETHING.

COME ON.

[BONGO DRUMS BEATING]

[LOUD RUSTLING]

[WILD ANIMALS CALLING]

[BONGOS PLAYING]

[RUSTLING]

[BONGOS PLAY]

HA! GOTCHA!

[RUSTLING]

HUH. I GUESS
MALINA AND KRONK
AREN'T FOLLOWING ME.

AND PLAYING BONGOS
TO MAKE IT MORE EXCITING.

Malina: I TOLD YOU
NOT TO PLAY THE BONGOS.

BUT I LIKE BONGOS.

PULL THE VINE, KRONK.

THAT HAPPENED BEFORE
TO YZMA.

OH. OTHER VINE,
MAYBE?

HA! KUZCO!

HUH?!

KUZCO CAN HOLD HIS BREATH
FOR A REALLY LONG TIME.

[GASPING] WHOOH.

MALINA. KRONK.
WHAT A SURPRISE.

I KNEW YOU WERE
WAY TOO CALM ABOUT
SURVIVING IN THE JUNGLE.

AND NOW I KNOW WHY.

SO, WHAT
IS THIS?

OH, THIS? IT'S
A PING-PONG PADDLE.
WANNA PLAY?

I GET WINNER.

NO, I MEAN THIS CAVE

AND ALL THIS STUFF.

WHAT'S GOIN' ON?

OK, CHECK IT OUT.

THIS IS AN EMERGENCY
EMPEROR BUNKER.

IT'S HERE TO KEEP ME
SAFE AND COMFY

IN CASE
OF AN EMERGENCY.

ISN'T IT GREAT?
OOH. LOOK.

HONOR BAR.

KUZCO, YOU'RE
SUPPOSED TO BE USING

YOUR COMMON SENSE
AND INSTINCT.

OOH, OOH, LOOK
AT THIS LITTLE BAG
OF COOKIES.

OH, ISN'T IT CUTE?

LITTLE BAG.

LOOK, ME AND MY MOM
AND MY SISTER,

WE CAMP ALL THE TIME.

AND KRONK'S
A JUNIOR CHIPMUNK
TROOP LEADER.

STICK WITH US,
AND YOU'LL BE FINE.

REALLY? YOU'D
DO THAT FOR ME?

AS LONG AS YOU DON'T GET
ALL SAPPY ABOUT IT.
RIGHT, KRONK?

CAN WE PLAY
PING-PONG FIRST?

THE KEY
TO FISHING...

IS PATIENCE.

OK, NOTHING'S
HAPPENIN'.

LET'S FIND
ANOTHER RIVER.

MY POLE'S,
LIKE, BENDING?

IS THIS NORMAL?

HA HA HA!
YOU GOT ONE!

YOU GOT A BITE!
WE'RE HAVIN' FISH
FOR DINNER!

NOW, WE NEED
TO MAKE A PAN

AND FIND GARLIC,
HORSERADISH,
OLIVE OIL,

AND PEPPER
FOR THE RÉMOULADE
SAUCE.

[SPLASH]

KUZCO?

FISH?

HEY, I BUILT
A HOUSE!

IT'S NOT A HOUSE.
IT'S A LEAN-TO.

IF YOU SAY SO.

MIND IF I FINISH THE ROOF
OF OUR LOVELY HOME?

AS LONG AS YOU
NEVER CALL IT
THAT AGAIN, SURE.

HA HA! LOOK AT ME.
I'M A--

OH!

HOME WRECKER.

WANNA BE A JUNGLE SURVIVOR
JUST LIKE ME?

KUZCO'S DOODLES
HAS A FEW TIPS

FOR ROUGHING IT
KUZCO STYLE.

TIP NUMBER ONE--
CAMPFIRES AND WATER

DON'T MIX.

ESPECIALLY WHEN THAT CAMPFIRE
IS COOKING DINNER.

TIP 2--BIRDS DON'T LIKE
TO SHARE THEIR EGGS.

ALSO, BIRDS FLY A LOT FASTER
THAN WE RUN.

[SCREECHING]

AND BIRDS ARE STRONGER
THAN THEY LOOK.

TIP NUMBER 3--
LOTS OF TREES
IN THE JUNGLE

LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME...
WHICH MEANS

IT'S REALLY EASY
TO GET LOST

UNLESS YOU MARK YOUR TRAIL.

TIP NUMBER 4--
DON'T MARK YOUR TRAIL
WITH ACORNS...

'CAUSE SOME ANIMALS
ACTUALLY EAT THOSE THINGS.

WHATEVER.

TIP NUMBER 5--
PEOPLE GET REALLY MAD
IN THE JUNGLE,

ESPECIALLY IF YOU POUR
WATER ON THEIR DINNER,

GET THEM ATTACKED
BY A HAWK, AND MAKE
THEM HOPELESSLY LOST.

COME ON, GUYS.
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.

WE HAVE NO FOOD,
NO WATER,
AND NO SHELTER.

HOW IS IT NOT THAT BAD?

WE STILL HAVE BONGOS.
NOPE.

LOST IN THE COLLAPSE
OF LEAN-TO NUMBER 6.

SO I LEANED
AGAINST THE LEAN-TO.

THE NAME
IS VERY MISLEADING.

LOOK, I KNOW
I RUINED EVERYTHING

AND YOU GUYS
WOULD BE BETTER OFF
WITHOUT ME.

NO, NO, IT'S TRUE.
DON'T ARGUE.

ANYWAY, I JUST
WANTED TO THANK YOU.

HEY, I ACTUALLY
LEARNED STUFF TODAY.

OH, ABOUT WHAT?

THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T
DO IN THE JUNGLE?

EXACTLY! I KNOW MORE
ABOUT WHAT NOT TO DO
OUT HERE

THAN I EVER WOULD'VE
LEARNED IN THAT WARM,
COMFY CAVE

FULL OF FRESH FRUIT
AND SILK ROBES

AND SCENTED CANDLES
AND PING-PONG.

LITTLE BAGS
OF HONOR BAR COOKIES?
HMM?

HONESTLY...THAT
SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD.

ALL I WANT IS JUST
ONE GAME OF PING-PONG.

JUST ONE.

OR MAYBE
A PING-PONG TOURNEY.

BUT WE DON'T
NEED THE CAVE.

ALL WE NEED'S
EACH OTHER. RIGHT?

[THUNDER]

OK, CAVE IT IS.
LET'S GO.

SO, UH,
WHAT SHOULD WE TELL
MR. MULAGUAKO?

MR. M.? JUST LEAVE
THAT TO THE KUZCO.

LESS TALK...

MORE PONG.

YOUR CAMP
IS A DISASTER.

YET YOU ALL
LOOK LIKE YOU

JUST STEPPED OUT
OF THE SPA.
CARE TO EXPLAIN?

YEAH. WE SORT OF STAYED
IN AN EMERGENCY
EMPEROR BUNKER.

AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT.

MALINA AND KRONK
DID EVERYTHING RIGHT,

AND I DID EVERYTHING WRONG.

EXCEPT IN PING-PONG.

I WON EVERY GAME.
AND I WAS UNSTOPPABLE.

WAIT!YOU'RE TAKING
ALL THE BLAME?

NO! HE'S DELIRIOUS.

AND FOR THE RECORD,

I DON'T THINK
THAT PING-PONG TABLE

WAS REGULATION SIZE.

I DID WHAT
I HAD TO DO.

IT WAS COLD, DARK,
AND RAINING, AND
THERE WERE NOISES.

SCARY NOISES. BUT
I PULLED US THROUGH.

YOU WANT TO FAIL ME
FOR THAT?

YOU GO AHEAD.
I CAN TAKE IT.

I'M NOT GOING
TO FAIL YOU.

WHOO. THANKS.
I WAS BLUFFING.

YOU SURVIVED.
YOU USED
YOUR COMMON SENSE,

YOUR INSTINCTS.
THAT WAS
THE ASSIGNMENT.

ALL THE OTHER GROUPS
QUIT.

THE UNDERWATER GROUP
DIDN'T EVEN WAIT
FOR THE SECOND SHARK.

BUT NOT YOU THREE.
YOU SURVIVED!

I GUESS
I'M A BETTER TEACHER
THAN I THOUGHT.

OF COURSE, IF YOU'D
LIKE TO TRY AGAIN

WITHOUT THE BUNKER...

YEAH, MY COMMON SENSE
SAYS, "ME NO THINK SO."

Kuzco: GUESS WHAT.
WE ALREADY GOT A LOT

OF CALLS ABOUT THIS ONE BIT.

RIGHT THERE. SEE THAT?

PEOPLE WANNA KNOW
IF THAT KID'S OK.

TRUST ME. HE'S FINE.

THAT SHARK DIDN'T EAT HIM.

NO, IT TOOK HIM
GENTLY BY THE HAND

AND WHISKED HIM AWAY
TO A HAPPY PARTY

IN THE HAPPY LAND
OF VEGETARIAN...SHARKS.

UH...HUH.

WELL, I'M SURE THOSE KIDS
ARE FINE, TOO.

HEY, HOW ABOUT WE WATCH
SOME LOGOS?