The Donna Reed Show (1958–1966): Season 2, Episode 8 - Nothing Like a Good Book - full transcript

The makers of Happy Gum,
the all-purpose chewing gum,

present Gun Butt. The
stirring tales of the West.

Jeff, will you turn that down?

Why don't you turn
yours down? I can't hear.

The next story tells the
love of a man for his horse...

Jeff!

And the cowboy who kept
a 15-year-old promise...

Come on, will you?

Here's the wagon train.

Don Spekoe resumes
his peaceful way

along the Chisholm Trail.



Gun Butt.

"Matt, look, what do
you make it to be?"

Couldn't one of you
answer the telephone?

"Swing the wagons around."

Hello?

Who?

Sylvia?

Oh.

I'm sorry, Sylvia, but there's
so much racket going on here.

What?

Tonight?

It's Sylvia Baker. Can
we make it tonight?

Sure, sure, I always have
a good time with Fred.

Mary! Jeff! Turn
those darn things off!



Uh, uh, yes, Syl...

Yes, Sylvia, tonight
will be just fine.

What?

Lydia?

Oh, well, I'm sorry.

I thought I was talking
to somebody else.

It's Lydia Langley.

Uh, it would be 8:00?
Yes, yes, it will be just fine.

We look forward to seeing you.

Goodbye, Lydia.

Oh.

Honey, I'm sorry.

I, I couldn't help it.

She, she wants us to come
by after dinner to meet a,

a doctor-somebody or other.

Oh, so the culture vultures
hooked another celebrity, huh?

Why do people always
think that doctors

want to meet other doctors?

I'm sorry, honey,

I, I don't want to go
any more than you do.

All right. Well, can't
you call her back?

Just tell her anything,
just tell her that...

No, let's go!

You know, Professor, I
was just saying to Mrs. Stone

that I have a feeling that
television is destroying our culture,

don't you agree?

Destroying our
culture? Oh, yes, indeed.

Well, I don't know
that I'd say that.

It's influencing our
culture certainly.

Oh, no doubt about that.

Changing it or accelerating
the change, perhaps.

My feeling exactly.

Actually, attacking television
is like attacking Gutenberg.

You can't hold Gutenberg
responsible for everything

that appears in print.

I feel Professor
Peabody is right.

After all, there are
good books and bad.

Yes, but at least they're books.

Oh, Christopher, dear.

This is our son, Christopher.

- Hello.
- Hello, Chris.

You may read for
half an hour, dear,

then turn out your light.

Thank you, Mother.

Christopher is reading
David Copperfield.

It's by Charles
Dickens, you know.

Yes, I know.

I'm on page 103.

Well, bully for you.

Oh, he's so excited,

he just can't wait to
see what comes next.

A hundred and four.

Run along now, dear.

Good night, everyone.

- Good night, Chris.
- Good night, Christopher.

Oh, he'd read all
night, if we'd let him,

spends half his
afternoons in the library,

doesn't he, Ms. Pennington?

He does?

Tell us, Professor,

did you see any new plays
while you were in New York?

Several. We, uh...

Uh, Look Homeward,
Angel, you saw that, I hope?

No, I, uh, believe
it had closed.

Oh, I'm sorry, dear, I was just
going to offer the boys a cigar.

No, thank you.

- Professor?
- Thank you.

Hmm-hmm.

Excuse me.

Georgie? Huh?

- Huh?
- Cigar?

Oh, thanks.

Cigar, dear? It's just a joke.

Uh, excuse me.

Uh, lately, I've been
re-reading the Decline and Fall

of the Roman Empire, that is.

Have you re-read it
recently, Professor?

Oh, I haven't read it
in 20 years, I'm afraid.

As I recall, once was enough.

Oh, but it holds up even today.

To me, Gibbon just
about sums up everything.

That is so true.

Don't you think so, Donna?

Well, I, I'm afraid
I, I haven't read it.

Well, uh, speaking
of monumental works,

Tolstoy, War and Peace,
now there's a book.

Oh, it is, indeed.

Have you re-read it recently?

Oh, in the past few years?

No, I'm, I'm afraid not.

I, uh, I have a feeling
Tolstoy is coming back,

don't you, professor?

Well, frankly, I didn't
know he's been away.

In fact, I understand they
recently made a movie of it.

Oh, movies.

You might be interested
to know that we've started

a discussion group here in town.

Ms. Pennington
here is our moderator.

Oh, well, the moderator
just sits, you know,

and lets everybody
else do the talking.

I think it would be a very
good idea for you and Dr. Stone

to join our group.

Oh, well, I think it
would be a good...

We, we don't have
much time, actually.

Well, one has to make time.

After all, people find time
for television and movies.

Hey, uh, speaking
of television...

Oh, you, uh, you don't have one?

Moran won by a knockout.

We heard it in the
car, coming over.

- What round?
- Fourth.

Now, uh, moving back
to Tolstoy, Professor...

Mom, where have
you been? I'm starv...

Hey, what have you got?

- Presents.
- Well, let me see.

- Presents.
- Let me, come on, Mom!

Wait a second. One
of them is for Daddy.

Oh, I'll go get him. Daddy!

Hey, Dad! Mom's home.
She got a present for you!

- Mom!
- Let me see, Mom!

- Which one is for me?
- Oh, which one is for me?

Hey, hey, hey,
what's going on here?

You'll see.

Uh, Mary, turn off
the phonograph.

Now, uh, this
one, this is for Jeff.

Gee, this is great.

It's not even my birthday
and, and it's not Christmas.

I'll bet it's a...

A book?

Oh, wait until you see.

David Copperfield.

- Why?
- Why not?

Honey, this is a wonderful book.

I just loved it
when I was a child.

It's long, isn't it?

Well, it, it's about this
little boy, David Copperfield.

He lived with
these people and...

Well, it's a fascinating book.

Thanks, Mom.

Aren't you going to read it?

Well, yeah, but now, I'm
going to watch television.

Honey, you missed the point.

This is to read instead
of watching television.

- But, Mom, the show is...
- Honey.

No, please give it a try.

Look, I have an idea.

Why don't you go upstairs
and close your door,

so you can concentrate?

I just adored this book
when I was your age.

Yeah, but you
didn't have any TV.

They just invented the
printing press at that time.

OK, Mom, I'll read it.

All right, dear.

Now, Mary, this is for you.

You're doing to
adore this record,

but I want to explain
something first.

You're doing to find it a lot
different from rock and roll.

But what is it, Mama?

Honey, if you just
listen to it once...

Tchaikovsky?

You heard of Tchaikovsky?

Oh, well, sure, Mama.

Honey, play it. Play it.

You're going to like it a lot.

Right now?

Why not?

OK.

Isn't it lovely?

Oh, it's all right.

Oh, honey, I knew you
would love this record.

You know, it might
interest you to know

that besides being an
outstanding composer,

Tchaikovsky led a
most interesting life.

Darling, why don't
you just let her listen?

Oh, for cats sake, Peggotty.

I'm getting to feel like we've
accomplished something.

Oh?

Now, this is for you.

For me?

Well, for both of us.

Mary, turn that off.

If you're going to play
that thing, take it upstairs,

so your father and I
don't have to listen to it.

But, Mommy, I already
played your record.

Jeff, where are you going?

Mom, I tried to read the
book, but honestly, gosh...

Honey, you couldn't have tried,

you haven't been
up there five minutes.

You haven't even
read the first chapter.

Well, maybe the trouble
is, I'm just a dumb kid.

You're not so dumb,
you're just lazy.

Now, you get back
upstairs and read that book.

But, Mom, the show is half over.

You are not going
to watch television.

Why not?

Because your father
and I want to read

and we can't do it with
all these racket going on.

Fortunately, there are
some people around here,

who still like to read.

Come on, Jeff.

Honestly, I don't
know what's the matter

with everybody around here.

They buy you a present and
then, they hit you on the head with it.

Shh.

Alex, I tried.

Darling, maybe
you're trying too hard.

What do you mean?

Well, I, I don't think you can
cram culture down their throats.

Kids learn only what
they want to learn.

The best way to teach
them is by example.

Well, honey, that's
exactly what I had in mind.

Open your present,
quick, open it.

War and Peace?

We can read it
aloud to each other,

and when they see
how interested we are...

Dr. Stone.

Well, Charlie, where
have you been?

Yeah, you're right, it's
about time we got together.

Why, I haven't been
bowling in months.

Tonight?

Uh, well, I'll tell
you, Charlie, I, uh,

I don't think I'm going
to make it tonight.

Uh, I've got homework.

Are you comfortable, dear?

All set to listen
to War and Peace.

All right.

Here we are.

Oh, no, this is the foreword.

Oh.

Oh, there we go.

No, this is the preface.

What are you skipping now?

It's still the preface.

Now, yes, here we are.

Book One.

Book 1? How many
books are there?

Um, 15 books,
and that's not all,

there's an epilogue and
there's a second epilogue.

We better get started.

All right. Book One.

Anna Scherer's soiree.

Hey, Mom!

Hi, Mommy! We're all through.

The dishes are done and
I didn't break a single one.

Well, it was very
nice of you to offer.

Thank you very much.

Jeff.

- You move!
- Would you mind...

- Hey, hey, hey.
- Come on. Stop it.

What are you doing?

Oh, we're reading
this fascinating book.

What's it about?

Oh, battles and
all sorts of things.

What's it called?

War and Peace.

Hey, that was the movie.
Did they make a book out of it?

I think the book came first.

What movie?

War and Peace that had
Audrey Hepburn and Mel Ferrer.

I was dying to see
it, but I missed it.

Well, here's your
chance. Stick around.

Yes, wait and
listen, if you like.

Actually, you haven't
missed a thing.

We, we've just started.

Book One.

Anna Scherer's soiree.

What's that?

Soiree? Oh, that's a party.

Oh, OK. Shoot.

Anna Scherer's soiree.

"Well, Prince, so Genoa
and Lucca are now just

family estates of
the Buonapartes.

But have a care—" Jeff,
where are you going?

Oh, to get an apple.

I always listen
better with an apple.

- Oh, get me one
while you're at it.
- Wait.

I'll get them.

- Oh, Mom, you don't have
to. I— - No. I, I'll get them.

When you go to the refrigerator,

you make a
treasure hunt out of it.

Look, kids, your mother has
gone to a lot of trouble for this.

She thinks it's important

and I agree with her that
you'll get some good out of it,

so let's be polite
and listen, shall we?

It won't hurt you.

- OK, Dad. I'll listen.
- Good.

Now, if there are no
further interruptions?

Here, you go, Jeff.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Sorry.

"But have a care, if
you withhold from me

that this might lead to war,

if you still attempt to
defend the monstrosities,

which have been concealed
under a cloak of evil,

then you and I are
no longer friends.

Not even my devoted
slave, as you term yourself,

but I alarm you, sit down
and tell me the news."

Honey, it, it gets more
interesting later on,

it really does.

"Now, with these words,
she greeted Prince..."

I'm not quite sure how
you pronounce this,

"Prince," uh, "Vasili
Ku, Ku, Kuragin,

a man of high rank
and importance,

who was the first to
arrive at her reception.

Anna Pavlov—"

Jeff, where are you going?

Oh, well, I, I, I better
get to bed on account of,

uh, we're having an
exam tomorrow and,

uh, I got to be on the ball.

And I, I just remembered,
I have homework.

I thought I told you
to... never mind.

What?

Every book can't begin
with shooting, you know.

I, I'm sure this gets
more interesting later on.

Oh, I'm interested.

It's just that, well, let me
know how it comes out.

- Good night, Mommy.
- Good night, Mary.

- Good night, Daddy.
- Good night.

Well, I guess that's that.

Unless you still want to...

Don't you want to?

Oh, sure, if you do.

Well, I don't want to force you.

- No, no, I'm enjoying it.
- Are you sure?

Honestly, go ahead.

"Anna Pavlovna had had
a cough for some days.

She was, as she said,
suffering from la grippe;

grippe, then being a new
word, only used by the elite.

Anna looked at him and said..."

Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie,

kissed the girls
and made them cry.

Huh?

- You weren't listening
to what I said.
- Yes, I was.

No, you—what did I say?

Well, I, darling, you
were reading, uh...

Alex, how can I
influence the children

if you have no
interest in culture?

Oh, now, wait a minute.
Now, how did this all start?

We went over to Lydia Langley's
house and ever since then...

Honey, you can make fun of
Lydia Langley all you want, but...

Well, the next thing you know,

you'd be going to her
little discussion group.

That's a very good idea.

Now, honey...

Somebody in this family
has got to keep us all

from becoming barbarians.

Yes, Lydia.

Oh, I'd love to join your group.

On Friday?

Oh, that's wonderful.

I'm delighted you're joining us.

Now, what book are you reading?

Well, the other evening, you
mentioned War and Peace...

Good. I'll put you down for
a report on War and Peace.

No, wait a minute.

I, I, I didn't know I was going
to have to make a report on it...

Oh, just a brief report.

After all, you've
read the book before.

It'll be interesting to get your
reaction on reading it again.

Yes, of course.

Well, you'll have
to forgive me now,

I really must run.

I'm taking little
Christopher to the library.

We'll expect you Friday.

All right, on Friday.

Goodbye, Lydia.

This is Wednesday.

Well, I'm aware of that.

A lot of pages here, dear.

Oh, I'll read it and
enjoy every minute of it.

By Friday?

Oh, there's plenty of time.

Thank you, dear.

Good morning.

- Oh, thank you, dear.
- Yes, Mom.

Darling, are you
feeling all right?

I feel like I used
to before exams.

I know, Mom,
butterflies in the tum-tum.

Look, I'm not even
halfway through this book.

I, I can't go tonight.

Well, it's not a
matter of life or death.

Mom, I know just how you feel.

- You do?
- Well, sure.

Like last month, when we
were having our History exam

and I hadn't studied.

Don't you remember?

I asked you to call
in and say I was sick.

Yes, I, I, I made you go.

What happened to the exam?

Nothing.

I just told Ms. Billings I
wasn't prepared and I flunked.

This month, I
studied, and I got a B.

Thank you, Jeff.

Now, listen, darling...

I can't do less than I
would expect of Jeff.

But it's not the same thing.

Yes, it is.

It, it's exactly the same thing.

I'll go tonight.

I sure hate to get up in
front of all those people

and expose my ignorance.

Sweetheart, I, I know I
haven't been too helpful.

I've been critical.

Well, how would you like
me to go with you tonight?

- Oh, honey, would you?
- Sure.

And you can have a
companion in ignorance.

As I remarked at
our last meeting,

I regret to see the way that our
attendance has been falling off.

However, those
of us who are left

will carry on with
our backs to the wall.

I'm pleased to welcome
to our midst this evening

two new members,
Dr. and Mrs. Stone.

Well, I'm just a
spectator myself.

I hope you don't mind.

Well, not at all.

We're pleased to have
another chair filled.

I'm sure the doctor will
have much to contribute.

Well, I'll, uh, now turn
the meeting over to our,

uh, moderator, Ms. Pennington.

Uh, yes.

Well, uh, shall we start
with our new members?

That seemed to be about
the only ones, who, uh...

Oh, yeah, Mrs. Stone
was going to report on

War and Peace. Mrs. Stone?

Oh, yeah.

I, uh...

I have an apology to make

because I can't give you
a report on War and Peace

because I haven't read it.

Well, I tried, but, uh,
this is as far as I got and,

uh, well, I, I don't think
I could tell you anything

about what I have read.

Um, I, I may have led
you to believe that I,

I'd read it before,
but I haven't and,

well, frankly, it'll be a
long time before I'll be able

to give you a report
on War and Peace.

I'm sorry.

Well, I, I don't think that
should prevent us from

hearing something about it now.

Uh, Mrs. Langley, uh,

since War and Peace
is one of your favorites,

I'm sure there are some
illuminating comments

you could make?

Oh, yes, Lydia.

Well, I think she'd be glad to.

Mrs. Langley, tell us, what
do you feel is the central theme

or message of War and Peace?

Well, uh, well,
it's, uh, very, uh,

very difficult to put into,
uh, one sentence or...

We realize that.

Or two or even, uh, three.

Yes.

But, to me, the most
dramatic scene of the book

and, uh, the one which perhaps
best embodies its message

is the scene in which Audrey
Hepburn and Mel Ferrer

are seated together...

I, uh, I meant to say...

Oh, you know, the scene
that I like the best in the picture

- was when Audrey Hepburn got
married to that darling Mel— - Darling man.

I think Mel Ferrer was
just perfect as the prince.

Oh, I thought Henry
Fonda was marvelous.

Is there anything anyone
else would like to say about

War and Peace?

Um, how many here play Bridge?

Oh, it's just enough
for two tables.

Uh, George, please
get another table.

Let's get on it.

Mom?

You and dad reading or anything?

No, Jeff, we're
taking the day off.

Then, is it all right if I
watch you-know-what?

Do you think we should let...?

Why not?

But after the point we made...

What point were we making?

Tell me, why does
Jeff watch Gun Butt?

Because it's great.

And why does Mary
listen to rock and roll?

Because she's wacky.

Because the other kids do.

So, she belongs.

Well, darling, why do we
suddenly go all out for culture?

I have a feeling
you're going to tell me.

Because the other kids do.

Now, think of
yourself as Mary's age.

Honey, you're right.

I just remembered myself
listening to Wayne Cain records.

So, is it all right if
I watch Gun Butt?

Yeah, it's all right.

Well, can Eddie come, too?

Sure, Eddie, too.

Can Eddie bring a friend?

Well, now, wait a minute.
How many are they going to be?

Well, just this one.

You see, he usually watches
the show over at Eddie's house,

but Eddie's set is on the
blink, so is it all right if...

It's all right.

He's kind of a
cookie little guy,

but I feel sorry for him.

OK, you guys.
Come on, it's all right.

- Hi, Eddie.
- Hi.

David Copperfield.

Oh, Christopher, does your
mother know you're here?

Does your mother know
you're not at the library?

Never mind. We
won't say anything.

Yeah, come on,
Chris. Join the gang.

Have fun.

The makers of Happy
Gum present Gun Butt.

- Sweetheart?
- Hmm?

Have you ever
watched this thing?

Of course not.

Well, how do we know
what we're knocking?

I say, if you can't
lick them, join them.

Hey, great, you
guys. Shove over.