The Donna Reed Show (1958–1966): Season 2, Episode 3 - A Penny Earned - full transcript
After completing a newspaper quiz Donna learns she gets a perfect score for being thrifty, which impels her to become a spendthrift.
Darling,
I'm happy to say that our
marriage is an unqualified success.
It is?
Yeah.
Did you just decide that?
According to this
quiz in the paper,
"Test Your Wife,"
I've just given
you a score of 92.
- Is that good?
- Good.
According to the quiz, anything
over 85 is an ideal marriage.
Allow me to congratulate
you, Mrs. Stone.
Well, allow me to
congratulate you, Dr. Stone.
I think you, two, will
be very happy together.
Let me see how you rate me.
There, and believe me,
I was being perfectly
honest and objective about it.
Let's see. "Qualities
of Parenthood,"
18 out of a possible 20 points,
"Civic Interest,"
18 out of 20,
"Ability as Hostess,
18 out of 20,
"Habits of Thrift,
20 out of 20.
It's very interesting.
Yeah, you know, they
have test to measure
practically anything these days.
I wouldn't be surprised if
they had a test to measure
how good you
are at taking tests.
This represents your
true opinion of me, hmm?
- Yeah, yeah,
I thought you'd be pleased.
- Hmm-hmm.
Oh, I am. I'm delighted.
It's very flattering you think
me almost perfect as a mother,
almost perfect as a hostess
and absolutely perfect
in the habits of thrift.
Darling, you can make
anything sound damaging
with that tone of voice.
I'm not using any
particular tone of voice,
but it does come as
somewhat of a surprise to learn
that you regard me more highly
as a penny watcher
than you do a mother.
Honey, now, don't
twist things around.
All I meant was that you're
an exceptional manager
and a very good thing
for us that you are.
Storm warning is up.
I'm going over to Zack's.
Honey, I never dreamed you'd
take offense at a harmless quiz.
I'm not taking offense.
I'm just questioning
the way you rate me.
Well, and what's wrong
with calling you thrifty?
Nothing.
It's the way you arrived at it.
I do not carefully weigh cost
before making a purchase.
All I meant was that...
And I would not drive all the
way across town to save 15 cents.
It's just plain ridiculous.
I mean, the, the gas
alone would cost 8 cents
and there's 5 cents
for the parking meter
and all that wear
and tear on the car,
well, there's your 15
cents. That's ridiculous.
Yeah, right, especially
since you never weigh cost,
you just plunge ahead.
Oh, now, look, I don't
claim to be a spend thrift,
but on the other hand,
I am not frugal either.
Of course not.
Mending that old shirt of
mine is a hobby of yours.
I am not mending
this old shirt of yours.
Oh, then, what are
you doing with it?
I am making an apron out of it.
Honey, do you have any string
you can tie up this package with?
String? I'm afraid not.
Oh, don't you have an old
box where you saved strings
from packages and things?
No, I don't, and I don't
save old paper bags in tin foil.
All right. All right, honey.
In spite of what
you seem to think,
I am not a confirmed hoarder.
Honey, I never thought you were.
You're a careful,
efficient manager.
And there's some
old leftover coffee.
Yes, dear.
Mommy, Janey told me that
her whole family was invited
to Ellen Bergson's wedding.
- Well, so was ours.
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
- Oh, how wonderful.
I love to go to weddings.
Not me. I may not
even go to my own.
Oh, don't be too hasty. They
usually serve refreshments.
Well, maybe I will
go, but not to my own.
Jeff, the whole
family is going...
- Honey, do you have any string?
- No, Daddy.
The whole family is going
to Ellen Bergson's wedding.
Jeff, do you have any string?
No.
Oh, it's the biggest
wedding in Hilldale in years.
And it's formal, too.
Formal?
Does that mean I have
to wear my brown suit?
- No, dear.
- Good.
It means you'll have to
wear your dark blue suit.
Oh.
And, Mary, you can
wear your pink organdy.
Oh, Mommy, that,
that's like childish.
Can't I get a new formal?
Well, we'll try it on and see.
Oh, Jeff, put on your blue suit.
I want to see how it fits.
Do I have to?
Yes, dear. Now, run along.
Oh, boy.
Uh, what shape is
your tuxedo in, dear?
Oh, as good as new.
Yes, well, maybe
better try it on, hmm?
You think so?
What are you going to wear?
Oh, my red dress. I've
only worn it a few times.
Oh, buy yourself a
new one, if you want to.
Oh, thank you, dear,
but I hate to put money
in a dress I'll only wear...
Oh, maybe I will.
Go ahead.
I don't want you to feel
like you have to save money.
Well, I'll go upstairs
and try on my tux.
- Dear?
- Hmm?
Thank you.
You win, you get a new dress.
Oh, thank you, Mommy.
All right, break
it up, break it up.
Oh, Jeff.
What's the matter?
Haven't you ever
seen a blue suit before?
Yes, but you
look so funny, like,
well, like a
chicken trying to fly.
Now, Mary.
Honey, you've grown
more than I realized.
You'll have to have a new suit.
Well, can I have a
green one like Zack's,
with the leather buttons and...
No, dear, you may not.
Another dark blue one.
Oh.
Oh, Daddy.
Not bad, huh?
I might go into the
diplomatic service.
That is very nice.
Oh, Mommy, you're
not wearing that
same red dress again, are you?
Oh, why not?
It's not too childish for me
and I haven't outgrown it.
I know, but you've
worn it so many times
it's practically a
Hilldale tradition.
Oh, Mary, you're exaggerating.
There aren't that many occasions
in Hilldale to wear a formal.
Uh, I've only worn it,
oh, six or seven times.
Oh, Mother.
Well, I think it
looks pretty good.
You will look beautiful in it,
as you do in
everything you wear.
Thank you, dear.
That settles it.
I will not buy a new
dress for the wedding.
- But, George?
- Louise?
You will not buy a new dress
for the wedding and that is final.
George, please, come and
look, I haven't a thing to wear.
Just look.
Well, what are
all that, dust rags?
I can't wear any
of those things.
Oh, why not, for heaven's sake?
Any of these things.
Here, why can't you wear that?
No, I can't wear that again.
I wore that to the Kimball's
and the same people who
were there will be at the wedding.
For heaven's sake, Louise,
will you please
tell me something?
Why a man can wear
a suit until it falls apart,
but a woman can't be seen
in the same dress twice?
Well, men and
women are different.
Yes, I'm aware of that,
dear, but I want to know,
what happens to a woman
who wears the same dress twice?
Now, is she arrested
for vagrancy?
Is she picketed by the
clothing manufacturers?
Is she barred from
department stores?
Oh, George, you
just don't understand.
I'll try. Go on. Go ahead.
Well, you see,
it's just that, well,
uh, when a woman wears a
dress that other women have seen,
she, she doesn't feel chic
and that makes her insecure and,
and she has trouble
falling asleep at night,
and then, she gets
nervous from lack of sleep
and eventually, she
has a breakdown.
All this from wearing
the same dress twice?
It could happen.
Will you please
tell me something?
Why is it that Donna
Stone hasn't broken down?
Now, I've seen her in the
same dress more than once
and she looks rested and
relaxed and very beautiful.
Well, I'm quite sure
that even Donna Stone
is going to have a new
dress for the wedding.
Well, how do you know?
Well, it's that
kind of an affair.
Every woman in Hilldale will
have a new dress, except me.
Even Donna?
Certainly.
She couldn't possibly
wear that red formal again.
All right.
If Donna gets a new
dress, you'll get one, too.
Oh, thank you, darling.
She wouldn't wear it again.
Donna, I'm going to come clean.
I didn't just drop by because
I was in the neighborhood.
Oh, you make it sound
ominous. What is it?
Well, it's about the wedding.
Oh, yes, we're all
looking forward to it.
I just saw Gladys Walker.
She's getting a new
dress at the Bon-Ton,
a French model.
Oh, oh, I'm sure it
would be beautiful.
Gladys has such good taste.
And Ellen Thompson
is getting her new gown
next week in New York.
How exciting.
And I'm getting a new
dress, too, for the wedding.
Oh, yeah, you
always look wonderful.
What are you going
to wear, Donna?
Oh, I'm going to wear
the, the red dress.
I think you've seen it.
Oh, yes.
Isn't that the one you
wore to the Kimball's?
Yes, that's it.
And you wore at the Club Dance?
Yes.
And then, you wore at the
Curtis engagement party?
Yes.
And then, you wore it at...
Never mind, Louise,
you've made your point.
What's wrong with my red dress?
Oh, not a thing, dear.
It's lovely and so are you.
Well, it's just that you've worn it
at least five times that I know of.
Seven.
The more reason I should think
why you should get a new one.
Louise, this dress is quite new.
I, I like the way it looks.
I like the way it fits.
It's still in style.
I don't see any reason
to scrap it for a new dress.
It really doesn't make
sense. It just isn't practical.
That's your trouble.
You are too practical.
You don't buy a new
dress by a, by a slide rule.
It's a matter of instinct.
Well, my instincts
are all against it.
Donna, I think
it's just wonderful,
the way you decide just
how much you can spend and,
and how to find the
best values and...
but sometimes, I think you
have a tendency to be a little too,
uh, well, uh, too, uh...
Thrifty?
Yes, that's it.
I really think it
could be overdone.
Oh, Donna, let me appeal
to your sense of loyalty.
Loyalty to what?
To the women of Hilldale.
What are you talking about?
Donna, all over town,
women are arguing
with their husbands
about a new dress
for the wedding
and all over town,
husbands are saying,
"Donna Stone wears the
same dress year after year
and she looks lovely,
so why buy a new dress?"
You're making it
tough on all of us.
Louise, you can't be serious.
Oh, yes, I can.
George won't let me buy
a new dress unless you do.
Of course, I was only guessing
about the rest of the town,
but it's a pretty good guess.
You have a reputation.
A reputation as a penny-pincher?
Oh, please don't
put it that way, dear.
Everybody knows that
you're generous in every way.
It's just that, well,
you're not extravagant.
I'm a tightwad?
Oh, no, dear, not that. It's...
Well, as a matter of fact,
everyone is quite wrong.
I am going to buy a new dress.
You are?
Yes. Uh, as soon as Mary
gets home from school,
we're going shopping.
Marvelous!
I'll go with you.
Oh, Donna! It's a knockout!
An absolute stunner!
You and the gown complement
each other beautifully, Mrs. Stone.
Well, thank you,
it, it is lovely.
I think the color is
particularly becoming.
Yes, well, this is a very
flattering shade of blue.
Oh, if you can
resist that, Donna,
you're, you're just
not human, that's all.
Ms. Robbins?
Oh, excuse me, please.
Oh, I thought she'd never go.
Why? Why? What's wrong?
What are you doing?
I'm looking for the price tag.
Oh, that's the wrong
attitude, Donna.
First, you decide
whether you like the dress.
Well, I'm trying to decide
whether I like the dress or not,
that's why I'm looking
for the price tag.
Mommy.
- Oh.
- Oh, honey, it's gorgeous.
Do you really like it?
Oh, yes.
You, you don't think it,
well, makes me look
too young, do you?
Too young?
Oh, honey, you look
at least six months older
than you really are.
- Turn around.
- Really?
Yes.
Oh, Mother, yours
is just beautiful.
Oh, thank you.
Isn't it charming?
Oh, yes.
Well, we'll take this.
Oh, thank you, Mommy.
- I'm going to go change now.
- All right.
You and your daughter have
chosen two of the loveliest
dresses we have.
Yes, well, I've, uh, I've
decided against this dress.
Oh, Donna.
I'm sorry, Mrs. Stone,
I thought you liked it.
Oh, I, I do, but,
uh, but the color,
I, I, I don't like the color.
Why, you, yourself, said
that that shade of blue
was flattering to you.
I know, but...
But what?
Uh, blue depresses me.
It, uh, makes me feel blue.
Oh, Donna, this, this dress
is simply beautiful on you.
Well, I, I don't know. I...
Shall I put it away for
you while you decide?
Oh, would you do that, please?
Well, certainly, Mrs. Stone.
I'll see how your
daughter is getting along.
Oh, Donna, you're
a double-crosser.
Well, now, don't worry, I
haven't said I wouldn't take it.
I, I, I, I just want
to think about it.
- Hi, darling.
- Hi, dear.
How'd the shopping go?
Oh, we found a
lovely dress for Mary.
Oh. What did you
get for yourself?
Well, I tried on a very
pretty blue dress, but...
But?
It was expensive and I,
well, I just couldn't see
putting all that money
into a new dress when I
have a perfectly good one
hanging at home in the closet.
What's so funny?
Oh, I just had a picture of
you wrestling with yourself
in the dress shop.
Honestly, Alex, I don't think
you know me very well, really.
- Oh, come on, Donna—
- Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad!
- Hi, Jeff.
- Hi, honey.
Uh-uh.
Well, how am I going
to last until dinner?
You'll have to be brave.
Lamb croquettes. I love them.
Who said anything
about lamb croquettes?
Nobody. I just figured it out.
The other night,
we had roast lamb
and then, we have
lamb casserole,
so now, we're due
for lamb croquette.
Well, you're wrong.
Oh, now, darling, that
wasn't meant as a criticism.
I like lamb croquette.
It takes talent to run a kitchen
on a sound practical basis.
Well, this practical
kitchen is closing down.
- Huh?
- What do we do for dinner?
We're going out to
dinner, the whole family.
It sounds like a
very pleasant idea.
Where would you like to go?
Pierre's.
- Pierre's?
- Wow.
The most expensive
restaurant in town.
What happened?
Did somebody
leave us an oil well?
We don't have to be rich to
go out to dinner once in a while.
The trouble with this family
is it's too thrift conscious.
All right, all right, darling, if
that's really what you want,
I'll call Pierre's right now
and reserve us a table.
That's really what I want.
- Ah, Dr. Stone.
- Good evening, Pierre.
How are you?
Oh, it's wonderful to see you.
- It's an honor to
have you with us.
- Thank you.
- And your lovely wife.
- Hmm-hmm.
Good evening.
- And this is my daughter, Mary.
- How do you do?
- And my son, Jeff.
- How do you do?
Hello, Mary, Jeff.
How's your little
daughter, Pierre?
Oh, wonderful, Doctor.
You know, since you treated
her, the trouble has never returned.
Really, you did a work of magic.
Oh, nature helped
a little, too, I think.
All right.
- Your table is ready and
I shan't keep you waiting.
- Good.
Would you please follow me?
There we are.
Allow me, honey.
The menu.
Thank you.
Well, the waiter will be
here to take your orders
and I do hope you
will enjoy your dinner.
Thank you, Pierre.
Excuse me.
Now, I want everyone to order
from the left side of the menu.
No running fingers
down the price column.
Just order whatever
you feel like having.
Dangerous words.
Anything anyone wants.
I know what I want without
even looking at the menu.
Oh, I know what I wanted
until I looked at the menu.
Don't worry about prices, dear.
Oh, it's not the prices.
There's stuff on this menu
I've never even heard of,
like, what's pomme
de terre dauphinoise?
Dauphinoise.
That's potatoes, Jeff.
Why don't they say, "Potatoes"?
Well, because then, they
couldn't charge 2.50 for them.
It's worth a lot in
the French original,
but it loses in the translation.
That's the wrong attitude, dear.
Tonight, we do not
worry about cost.
We just order
whatever appeals to us.
Well, Mommy, what
about... is it, epinards?
That sounds good. What is it?
It's spinach.
It doesn't sound like spinach.
Do you suppose
it tastes like it?
Oh, I'm sure it's very good.
Anybody who likes
spinach would enjoy it.
Hey, here's something that
costs $18 and I can't even say it.
Don't try.
Anything that costs $18, I
don't want to hear about it.
I'm going to have a
steak, filet mignon.
Baked potato with chives.
I'm beginning to suspect
that it's the rest of you
who have the frugal instincts.
Well, oh, that's just that
the menu is unfamiliar.
Good evening.
- Oh, good evening.
- Good evening.
Mrs. Stone will
have the filet mignon.
- Medium-rare.
- Medium-rare.
- Baked potato.
- With chives.
Hmm-hmm.
And like some
caviar first, please.
Imported.
All our caviar is imported.
- I'll have the, uh, filet,
too, please, rare.
- Hmm-hmm.
Have you decided yet, honey?
Oh, uh, do you have
hamburger steak?
Cooked Napoleon a la Pierre.
Oh, that, that's
fine, I'll have that.
- What else?
- That, that's all.
Well, that is all?
Uh, I'm not very hungry.
Me, too, I'll have
the same thing.
The same thing.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Hmm-hmm.
Ah...
Yes, Madam?
I'll have the same
as the children,
uh, in-instead
of what I ordered.
The same thing.
Thank you.
Ah, that was delicious.
That's all I want.
I guess I'm full, too.
It's a shame not to finish it
when they cost 4.75 each.
I like hamburgers
at a ball game better.
It's just too spicy for me.
I'm sorry, it, it's my fault.
Oh, of course it isn't, dear.
How can you blame yourself?
Because we ordered by price
instead of what
we really wanted.
I guess you're right.
Well, I imagine, uh, you're
all still hungry, so, uh,
maybe we ought to
go home right now
and you can all have dinner?
The check, please.
Yes, sir.
Oh, no, no, no, no
check for Dr. Stone.
Tonight, you're all my guests.
I think it's a
very pretty dress.
Well, of course
it's a pretty dress.
That's not the point. I
said it was a pretty dress.
It's just not a new one.
Oh, I was flabbergasted
when, when Ms. Robbins told me
you decided not to
take that other dress.
Well, Louise, I, I
like this dress and,
well, I'm going to wear it.
Yes, but how will it
make you feel inside?
You know it's an old dress.
How do you feel down deep?
Well, it makes me
feel very sensible.
Exactly.
And no woman
wants to feel sensible.
She doesn't?
No.
A woman wants to
feel smart, not sensible.
Well, anyway,
Alex likes this dress.
Oh, he's a man.
I noticed that ages ago.
What I mean is, women
don't dress for men.
They dress for other women.
Yeah? Well, I guess
some women do.
Chic women do.
Men don't understand a
thing about a woman's clothes
except the price tag.
Oh, Donna, please get a
new dress for the wedding?
Well, uh, I'll try to keep
an open mind about it.
I don't like to make a
personal plea out of this,
but if you're going to wear
that same formal again,
I, I won't get the dress
I've got my heart set on.
And now, don't forget,
it's not just for me,
it's for all the
women of Hilldale.
I'll try to keep that
in mind, too, dear.
- Goodbye, dear.
- Goodbye.
- Hi, dear.
- Hi.
- Louise is gone?
- Yes.
Dear, do you think it
would be all right for me
to wear this dress
to the wedding?
Oh, I thought it
was all settled.
Well, it was, but, uh, I've
talked to Louise and now,
I'm not so sure.
Oh, darling, that dress
is perfectly all right.
Yes? Well, if you say so.
I do, believe me,
you'll get by with it.
Get by?
Honey, I don't
want to just get by.
Now, honey, all I said was...
How do you think it'll
make me feel inside?
Darling, it's all very simple,
if you want to wear
this dress, wear it.
If you want to buy
a new one, buy it.
Louise was right.
You really don't care.
- Yes, I do care.
- No, you don't.
You just admitted it.
You said, "Wear the red
dress or buy a new one."
It really doesn't make
any difference to you.
Now, honey, it just
sounded that way.
What I meant was, I want you to
do whatever will make you happy.
I'm going to buy a new dress,
for Louise and the
women of Hilldale.
Donna.
Donna!
Jeff.
Jeff, will you get
off of the steps?
Navy blue picks up everything.
There.
Thank you, baby.
Wowee.
Oh, Mommy, you
look simply divine.
Oh, Mom, you're a smash.
Oh, what more is
there for me to say?
Well, say that you
like the dress, if you do.
It's not fair to the bride.
With you in the same
room, nobody will look at her.
Then, you think it was worth it?
Of course it was worth it.
Well, dear, is the
price important?
I mean, isn't it how I feel
down deep that counts?
Well, it's whatever
makes you happy,
there's no price tag on that.
Come, children.
$240?
Next to the wedding cake, you
were the prettiest thing there.
Thank you, dear.
Oh, I'll get it.
I'll admit, the price
stunned me at first,
but it was worth
every penny of it.
You were the sensation
of the wedding.
Well, I'm glad you liked the
dress in spite of the price.
- Oh, actually,
Donna, the price— - Hi.
- Oh, hi, Louise.
- Hi, Louise.
Oh, stay where you are, please.
I know I'm upsetting
your breakfast,
but I just had to stop by.
Did you get away with it?
Get away with what?
Did he fall for the whole
thing, my price tag and all?
You mean, your
dress didn't cost $240?
I spent about $10
dye-ing the red dress black
and then, about $5 more
for some other changes.
Sum total, $15.
That was my new dress.
And this was my new dress.
Poor George.
I'm happy to say that our
marriage is an unqualified success.
It is?
Yeah.
Did you just decide that?
According to this
quiz in the paper,
"Test Your Wife,"
I've just given
you a score of 92.
- Is that good?
- Good.
According to the quiz, anything
over 85 is an ideal marriage.
Allow me to congratulate
you, Mrs. Stone.
Well, allow me to
congratulate you, Dr. Stone.
I think you, two, will
be very happy together.
Let me see how you rate me.
There, and believe me,
I was being perfectly
honest and objective about it.
Let's see. "Qualities
of Parenthood,"
18 out of a possible 20 points,
"Civic Interest,"
18 out of 20,
"Ability as Hostess,
18 out of 20,
"Habits of Thrift,
20 out of 20.
It's very interesting.
Yeah, you know, they
have test to measure
practically anything these days.
I wouldn't be surprised if
they had a test to measure
how good you
are at taking tests.
This represents your
true opinion of me, hmm?
- Yeah, yeah,
I thought you'd be pleased.
- Hmm-hmm.
Oh, I am. I'm delighted.
It's very flattering you think
me almost perfect as a mother,
almost perfect as a hostess
and absolutely perfect
in the habits of thrift.
Darling, you can make
anything sound damaging
with that tone of voice.
I'm not using any
particular tone of voice,
but it does come as
somewhat of a surprise to learn
that you regard me more highly
as a penny watcher
than you do a mother.
Honey, now, don't
twist things around.
All I meant was that you're
an exceptional manager
and a very good thing
for us that you are.
Storm warning is up.
I'm going over to Zack's.
Honey, I never dreamed you'd
take offense at a harmless quiz.
I'm not taking offense.
I'm just questioning
the way you rate me.
Well, and what's wrong
with calling you thrifty?
Nothing.
It's the way you arrived at it.
I do not carefully weigh cost
before making a purchase.
All I meant was that...
And I would not drive all the
way across town to save 15 cents.
It's just plain ridiculous.
I mean, the, the gas
alone would cost 8 cents
and there's 5 cents
for the parking meter
and all that wear
and tear on the car,
well, there's your 15
cents. That's ridiculous.
Yeah, right, especially
since you never weigh cost,
you just plunge ahead.
Oh, now, look, I don't
claim to be a spend thrift,
but on the other hand,
I am not frugal either.
Of course not.
Mending that old shirt of
mine is a hobby of yours.
I am not mending
this old shirt of yours.
Oh, then, what are
you doing with it?
I am making an apron out of it.
Honey, do you have any string
you can tie up this package with?
String? I'm afraid not.
Oh, don't you have an old
box where you saved strings
from packages and things?
No, I don't, and I don't
save old paper bags in tin foil.
All right. All right, honey.
In spite of what
you seem to think,
I am not a confirmed hoarder.
Honey, I never thought you were.
You're a careful,
efficient manager.
And there's some
old leftover coffee.
Yes, dear.
Mommy, Janey told me that
her whole family was invited
to Ellen Bergson's wedding.
- Well, so was ours.
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
- Oh, how wonderful.
I love to go to weddings.
Not me. I may not
even go to my own.
Oh, don't be too hasty. They
usually serve refreshments.
Well, maybe I will
go, but not to my own.
Jeff, the whole
family is going...
- Honey, do you have any string?
- No, Daddy.
The whole family is going
to Ellen Bergson's wedding.
Jeff, do you have any string?
No.
Oh, it's the biggest
wedding in Hilldale in years.
And it's formal, too.
Formal?
Does that mean I have
to wear my brown suit?
- No, dear.
- Good.
It means you'll have to
wear your dark blue suit.
Oh.
And, Mary, you can
wear your pink organdy.
Oh, Mommy, that,
that's like childish.
Can't I get a new formal?
Well, we'll try it on and see.
Oh, Jeff, put on your blue suit.
I want to see how it fits.
Do I have to?
Yes, dear. Now, run along.
Oh, boy.
Uh, what shape is
your tuxedo in, dear?
Oh, as good as new.
Yes, well, maybe
better try it on, hmm?
You think so?
What are you going to wear?
Oh, my red dress. I've
only worn it a few times.
Oh, buy yourself a
new one, if you want to.
Oh, thank you, dear,
but I hate to put money
in a dress I'll only wear...
Oh, maybe I will.
Go ahead.
I don't want you to feel
like you have to save money.
Well, I'll go upstairs
and try on my tux.
- Dear?
- Hmm?
Thank you.
You win, you get a new dress.
Oh, thank you, Mommy.
All right, break
it up, break it up.
Oh, Jeff.
What's the matter?
Haven't you ever
seen a blue suit before?
Yes, but you
look so funny, like,
well, like a
chicken trying to fly.
Now, Mary.
Honey, you've grown
more than I realized.
You'll have to have a new suit.
Well, can I have a
green one like Zack's,
with the leather buttons and...
No, dear, you may not.
Another dark blue one.
Oh.
Oh, Daddy.
Not bad, huh?
I might go into the
diplomatic service.
That is very nice.
Oh, Mommy, you're
not wearing that
same red dress again, are you?
Oh, why not?
It's not too childish for me
and I haven't outgrown it.
I know, but you've
worn it so many times
it's practically a
Hilldale tradition.
Oh, Mary, you're exaggerating.
There aren't that many occasions
in Hilldale to wear a formal.
Uh, I've only worn it,
oh, six or seven times.
Oh, Mother.
Well, I think it
looks pretty good.
You will look beautiful in it,
as you do in
everything you wear.
Thank you, dear.
That settles it.
I will not buy a new
dress for the wedding.
- But, George?
- Louise?
You will not buy a new dress
for the wedding and that is final.
George, please, come and
look, I haven't a thing to wear.
Just look.
Well, what are
all that, dust rags?
I can't wear any
of those things.
Oh, why not, for heaven's sake?
Any of these things.
Here, why can't you wear that?
No, I can't wear that again.
I wore that to the Kimball's
and the same people who
were there will be at the wedding.
For heaven's sake, Louise,
will you please
tell me something?
Why a man can wear
a suit until it falls apart,
but a woman can't be seen
in the same dress twice?
Well, men and
women are different.
Yes, I'm aware of that,
dear, but I want to know,
what happens to a woman
who wears the same dress twice?
Now, is she arrested
for vagrancy?
Is she picketed by the
clothing manufacturers?
Is she barred from
department stores?
Oh, George, you
just don't understand.
I'll try. Go on. Go ahead.
Well, you see,
it's just that, well,
uh, when a woman wears a
dress that other women have seen,
she, she doesn't feel chic
and that makes her insecure and,
and she has trouble
falling asleep at night,
and then, she gets
nervous from lack of sleep
and eventually, she
has a breakdown.
All this from wearing
the same dress twice?
It could happen.
Will you please
tell me something?
Why is it that Donna
Stone hasn't broken down?
Now, I've seen her in the
same dress more than once
and she looks rested and
relaxed and very beautiful.
Well, I'm quite sure
that even Donna Stone
is going to have a new
dress for the wedding.
Well, how do you know?
Well, it's that
kind of an affair.
Every woman in Hilldale will
have a new dress, except me.
Even Donna?
Certainly.
She couldn't possibly
wear that red formal again.
All right.
If Donna gets a new
dress, you'll get one, too.
Oh, thank you, darling.
She wouldn't wear it again.
Donna, I'm going to come clean.
I didn't just drop by because
I was in the neighborhood.
Oh, you make it sound
ominous. What is it?
Well, it's about the wedding.
Oh, yes, we're all
looking forward to it.
I just saw Gladys Walker.
She's getting a new
dress at the Bon-Ton,
a French model.
Oh, oh, I'm sure it
would be beautiful.
Gladys has such good taste.
And Ellen Thompson
is getting her new gown
next week in New York.
How exciting.
And I'm getting a new
dress, too, for the wedding.
Oh, yeah, you
always look wonderful.
What are you going
to wear, Donna?
Oh, I'm going to wear
the, the red dress.
I think you've seen it.
Oh, yes.
Isn't that the one you
wore to the Kimball's?
Yes, that's it.
And you wore at the Club Dance?
Yes.
And then, you wore at the
Curtis engagement party?
Yes.
And then, you wore it at...
Never mind, Louise,
you've made your point.
What's wrong with my red dress?
Oh, not a thing, dear.
It's lovely and so are you.
Well, it's just that you've worn it
at least five times that I know of.
Seven.
The more reason I should think
why you should get a new one.
Louise, this dress is quite new.
I, I like the way it looks.
I like the way it fits.
It's still in style.
I don't see any reason
to scrap it for a new dress.
It really doesn't make
sense. It just isn't practical.
That's your trouble.
You are too practical.
You don't buy a new
dress by a, by a slide rule.
It's a matter of instinct.
Well, my instincts
are all against it.
Donna, I think
it's just wonderful,
the way you decide just
how much you can spend and,
and how to find the
best values and...
but sometimes, I think you
have a tendency to be a little too,
uh, well, uh, too, uh...
Thrifty?
Yes, that's it.
I really think it
could be overdone.
Oh, Donna, let me appeal
to your sense of loyalty.
Loyalty to what?
To the women of Hilldale.
What are you talking about?
Donna, all over town,
women are arguing
with their husbands
about a new dress
for the wedding
and all over town,
husbands are saying,
"Donna Stone wears the
same dress year after year
and she looks lovely,
so why buy a new dress?"
You're making it
tough on all of us.
Louise, you can't be serious.
Oh, yes, I can.
George won't let me buy
a new dress unless you do.
Of course, I was only guessing
about the rest of the town,
but it's a pretty good guess.
You have a reputation.
A reputation as a penny-pincher?
Oh, please don't
put it that way, dear.
Everybody knows that
you're generous in every way.
It's just that, well,
you're not extravagant.
I'm a tightwad?
Oh, no, dear, not that. It's...
Well, as a matter of fact,
everyone is quite wrong.
I am going to buy a new dress.
You are?
Yes. Uh, as soon as Mary
gets home from school,
we're going shopping.
Marvelous!
I'll go with you.
Oh, Donna! It's a knockout!
An absolute stunner!
You and the gown complement
each other beautifully, Mrs. Stone.
Well, thank you,
it, it is lovely.
I think the color is
particularly becoming.
Yes, well, this is a very
flattering shade of blue.
Oh, if you can
resist that, Donna,
you're, you're just
not human, that's all.
Ms. Robbins?
Oh, excuse me, please.
Oh, I thought she'd never go.
Why? Why? What's wrong?
What are you doing?
I'm looking for the price tag.
Oh, that's the wrong
attitude, Donna.
First, you decide
whether you like the dress.
Well, I'm trying to decide
whether I like the dress or not,
that's why I'm looking
for the price tag.
Mommy.
- Oh.
- Oh, honey, it's gorgeous.
Do you really like it?
Oh, yes.
You, you don't think it,
well, makes me look
too young, do you?
Too young?
Oh, honey, you look
at least six months older
than you really are.
- Turn around.
- Really?
Yes.
Oh, Mother, yours
is just beautiful.
Oh, thank you.
Isn't it charming?
Oh, yes.
Well, we'll take this.
Oh, thank you, Mommy.
- I'm going to go change now.
- All right.
You and your daughter have
chosen two of the loveliest
dresses we have.
Yes, well, I've, uh, I've
decided against this dress.
Oh, Donna.
I'm sorry, Mrs. Stone,
I thought you liked it.
Oh, I, I do, but,
uh, but the color,
I, I, I don't like the color.
Why, you, yourself, said
that that shade of blue
was flattering to you.
I know, but...
But what?
Uh, blue depresses me.
It, uh, makes me feel blue.
Oh, Donna, this, this dress
is simply beautiful on you.
Well, I, I don't know. I...
Shall I put it away for
you while you decide?
Oh, would you do that, please?
Well, certainly, Mrs. Stone.
I'll see how your
daughter is getting along.
Oh, Donna, you're
a double-crosser.
Well, now, don't worry, I
haven't said I wouldn't take it.
I, I, I, I just want
to think about it.
- Hi, darling.
- Hi, dear.
How'd the shopping go?
Oh, we found a
lovely dress for Mary.
Oh. What did you
get for yourself?
Well, I tried on a very
pretty blue dress, but...
But?
It was expensive and I,
well, I just couldn't see
putting all that money
into a new dress when I
have a perfectly good one
hanging at home in the closet.
What's so funny?
Oh, I just had a picture of
you wrestling with yourself
in the dress shop.
Honestly, Alex, I don't think
you know me very well, really.
- Oh, come on, Donna—
- Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad!
- Hi, Jeff.
- Hi, honey.
Uh-uh.
Well, how am I going
to last until dinner?
You'll have to be brave.
Lamb croquettes. I love them.
Who said anything
about lamb croquettes?
Nobody. I just figured it out.
The other night,
we had roast lamb
and then, we have
lamb casserole,
so now, we're due
for lamb croquette.
Well, you're wrong.
Oh, now, darling, that
wasn't meant as a criticism.
I like lamb croquette.
It takes talent to run a kitchen
on a sound practical basis.
Well, this practical
kitchen is closing down.
- Huh?
- What do we do for dinner?
We're going out to
dinner, the whole family.
It sounds like a
very pleasant idea.
Where would you like to go?
Pierre's.
- Pierre's?
- Wow.
The most expensive
restaurant in town.
What happened?
Did somebody
leave us an oil well?
We don't have to be rich to
go out to dinner once in a while.
The trouble with this family
is it's too thrift conscious.
All right, all right, darling, if
that's really what you want,
I'll call Pierre's right now
and reserve us a table.
That's really what I want.
- Ah, Dr. Stone.
- Good evening, Pierre.
How are you?
Oh, it's wonderful to see you.
- It's an honor to
have you with us.
- Thank you.
- And your lovely wife.
- Hmm-hmm.
Good evening.
- And this is my daughter, Mary.
- How do you do?
- And my son, Jeff.
- How do you do?
Hello, Mary, Jeff.
How's your little
daughter, Pierre?
Oh, wonderful, Doctor.
You know, since you treated
her, the trouble has never returned.
Really, you did a work of magic.
Oh, nature helped
a little, too, I think.
All right.
- Your table is ready and
I shan't keep you waiting.
- Good.
Would you please follow me?
There we are.
Allow me, honey.
The menu.
Thank you.
Well, the waiter will be
here to take your orders
and I do hope you
will enjoy your dinner.
Thank you, Pierre.
Excuse me.
Now, I want everyone to order
from the left side of the menu.
No running fingers
down the price column.
Just order whatever
you feel like having.
Dangerous words.
Anything anyone wants.
I know what I want without
even looking at the menu.
Oh, I know what I wanted
until I looked at the menu.
Don't worry about prices, dear.
Oh, it's not the prices.
There's stuff on this menu
I've never even heard of,
like, what's pomme
de terre dauphinoise?
Dauphinoise.
That's potatoes, Jeff.
Why don't they say, "Potatoes"?
Well, because then, they
couldn't charge 2.50 for them.
It's worth a lot in
the French original,
but it loses in the translation.
That's the wrong attitude, dear.
Tonight, we do not
worry about cost.
We just order
whatever appeals to us.
Well, Mommy, what
about... is it, epinards?
That sounds good. What is it?
It's spinach.
It doesn't sound like spinach.
Do you suppose
it tastes like it?
Oh, I'm sure it's very good.
Anybody who likes
spinach would enjoy it.
Hey, here's something that
costs $18 and I can't even say it.
Don't try.
Anything that costs $18, I
don't want to hear about it.
I'm going to have a
steak, filet mignon.
Baked potato with chives.
I'm beginning to suspect
that it's the rest of you
who have the frugal instincts.
Well, oh, that's just that
the menu is unfamiliar.
Good evening.
- Oh, good evening.
- Good evening.
Mrs. Stone will
have the filet mignon.
- Medium-rare.
- Medium-rare.
- Baked potato.
- With chives.
Hmm-hmm.
And like some
caviar first, please.
Imported.
All our caviar is imported.
- I'll have the, uh, filet,
too, please, rare.
- Hmm-hmm.
Have you decided yet, honey?
Oh, uh, do you have
hamburger steak?
Cooked Napoleon a la Pierre.
Oh, that, that's
fine, I'll have that.
- What else?
- That, that's all.
Well, that is all?
Uh, I'm not very hungry.
Me, too, I'll have
the same thing.
The same thing.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Hmm-hmm.
Ah...
Yes, Madam?
I'll have the same
as the children,
uh, in-instead
of what I ordered.
The same thing.
Thank you.
Ah, that was delicious.
That's all I want.
I guess I'm full, too.
It's a shame not to finish it
when they cost 4.75 each.
I like hamburgers
at a ball game better.
It's just too spicy for me.
I'm sorry, it, it's my fault.
Oh, of course it isn't, dear.
How can you blame yourself?
Because we ordered by price
instead of what
we really wanted.
I guess you're right.
Well, I imagine, uh, you're
all still hungry, so, uh,
maybe we ought to
go home right now
and you can all have dinner?
The check, please.
Yes, sir.
Oh, no, no, no, no
check for Dr. Stone.
Tonight, you're all my guests.
I think it's a
very pretty dress.
Well, of course
it's a pretty dress.
That's not the point. I
said it was a pretty dress.
It's just not a new one.
Oh, I was flabbergasted
when, when Ms. Robbins told me
you decided not to
take that other dress.
Well, Louise, I, I
like this dress and,
well, I'm going to wear it.
Yes, but how will it
make you feel inside?
You know it's an old dress.
How do you feel down deep?
Well, it makes me
feel very sensible.
Exactly.
And no woman
wants to feel sensible.
She doesn't?
No.
A woman wants to
feel smart, not sensible.
Well, anyway,
Alex likes this dress.
Oh, he's a man.
I noticed that ages ago.
What I mean is, women
don't dress for men.
They dress for other women.
Yeah? Well, I guess
some women do.
Chic women do.
Men don't understand a
thing about a woman's clothes
except the price tag.
Oh, Donna, please get a
new dress for the wedding?
Well, uh, I'll try to keep
an open mind about it.
I don't like to make a
personal plea out of this,
but if you're going to wear
that same formal again,
I, I won't get the dress
I've got my heart set on.
And now, don't forget,
it's not just for me,
it's for all the
women of Hilldale.
I'll try to keep that
in mind, too, dear.
- Goodbye, dear.
- Goodbye.
- Hi, dear.
- Hi.
- Louise is gone?
- Yes.
Dear, do you think it
would be all right for me
to wear this dress
to the wedding?
Oh, I thought it
was all settled.
Well, it was, but, uh, I've
talked to Louise and now,
I'm not so sure.
Oh, darling, that dress
is perfectly all right.
Yes? Well, if you say so.
I do, believe me,
you'll get by with it.
Get by?
Honey, I don't
want to just get by.
Now, honey, all I said was...
How do you think it'll
make me feel inside?
Darling, it's all very simple,
if you want to wear
this dress, wear it.
If you want to buy
a new one, buy it.
Louise was right.
You really don't care.
- Yes, I do care.
- No, you don't.
You just admitted it.
You said, "Wear the red
dress or buy a new one."
It really doesn't make
any difference to you.
Now, honey, it just
sounded that way.
What I meant was, I want you to
do whatever will make you happy.
I'm going to buy a new dress,
for Louise and the
women of Hilldale.
Donna.
Donna!
Jeff.
Jeff, will you get
off of the steps?
Navy blue picks up everything.
There.
Thank you, baby.
Wowee.
Oh, Mommy, you
look simply divine.
Oh, Mom, you're a smash.
Oh, what more is
there for me to say?
Well, say that you
like the dress, if you do.
It's not fair to the bride.
With you in the same
room, nobody will look at her.
Then, you think it was worth it?
Of course it was worth it.
Well, dear, is the
price important?
I mean, isn't it how I feel
down deep that counts?
Well, it's whatever
makes you happy,
there's no price tag on that.
Come, children.
$240?
Next to the wedding cake, you
were the prettiest thing there.
Thank you, dear.
Oh, I'll get it.
I'll admit, the price
stunned me at first,
but it was worth
every penny of it.
You were the sensation
of the wedding.
Well, I'm glad you liked the
dress in spite of the price.
- Oh, actually,
Donna, the price— - Hi.
- Oh, hi, Louise.
- Hi, Louise.
Oh, stay where you are, please.
I know I'm upsetting
your breakfast,
but I just had to stop by.
Did you get away with it?
Get away with what?
Did he fall for the whole
thing, my price tag and all?
You mean, your
dress didn't cost $240?
I spent about $10
dye-ing the red dress black
and then, about $5 more
for some other changes.
Sum total, $15.
That was my new dress.
And this was my new dress.
Poor George.