The Donna Reed Show (1958–1966): Season 2, Episode 23 - A Night to Howl - full transcript

Hi, darling.

Oh, what a day.

I haven't stopped
for five minutes.

What are you reading, dear?

Uh-hmm.

Oh, it's Rupert Brooke.

Hmm-hmm.

"Ah, God, to see the
branches stir across the moon

at Grantchester."

You know it.

"Still stands the
clock at ten to three,



and is there honey yet for tea?"

Mother, I never
thought of you that way.

Oh, in what way?

You and poetry.

Oh, I used to love it
when I was your age.

Don't seem to have
much time for it now.

Oh, Mother.

Honey, I'm going to make
duck a l'orange for dinner

and surprise your father.

- Mommy.
- Yes, dear.

Would you stay and
talk to me for a minute?

Sure. What is it?

Oh, so few understand.

Understand what?



The girls I know...

They're all so shallow.

All they're interested in
is sitting around Kelsey's

all afternoon, drinking
malts and talking about boys.

I just don't feel we have
anything in common anymore.

Oh.

Mother, you know something?

Most people might as well be
dead as the way they are now.

Well, that's certainly
a nice thing to say.

But, well, it's true.

They let their senses be dulled

until they're immune
to life practically.

Until they're just vegetables.

Oh my goodness, vegetables.

I got vegetables waiting
in the car and the duck.

Oh, mother, you too?

Me too, what?

Well, can't you just forget
the groceries for one minute?

But, honey, they're out there in
the back seat of the car thawing.

I know, but can't you just
spare one little minute now

and then for, well, for beauty.

Can't you ever
forget the groceries?

Honey, when Rupert Brooke
wrote about "And honey yet for tea,

he was writing about groceries.

Oh, Mother. Does it
have to happen to people?

You weren't always this way.

Well, you had it
once but you've lost it.

What's done this to you?

Is it age, your or
marriage, or what?

Mary?

Honey, I'm sorry if I
was abrupt with you.

Mary, what's the matter?

Oh, Mommy, it all
seems so hopeless.

Well, honey, I
know how you feel.

It's just part of growing up.

Well, I don't want to grow up.

Well, I'm afraid that's something
you'll just going to have to face.

Mommy, I've made up my mind.

I want to die young

before all the wonder and
magic are gone out of life.

Why, Mary.

Honey, there's more to living
than just magic and youth and...

Oh, Mommy. That's just it.

I can't bear to see
you like all the others,

just letting your
life drift away.

Oh, you and Daddy
doing the same things

and going through the same
routine day in and day out.

Honey, routine is necessary.

I couldn't run this house...

Did Dad say something?

Oh, Mommy, I don't think is
any more aware than you are.

You know how he is.

He just wants
everybody to be satisfied.

Yes, I know.

Even if he isn't.

I know everything you're going
to say and do before you do it.

From the moment that Daddy
comes in the door at night...

Mary, now you're exaggerating.

No, Mother. It's true.

I can tell you word for word

exactly what will
happen this evening.

Daddy will come in the door.
He'll kiss you on the check.

He'll call me baby, and
he'll rumple Jeff's hair.

He'll ask how things
went at school today,

but he won't listen, and
he'll flop down on his chair,

pick his newspaper,

and that will be
the end of Daddy

and you until dinner time.

Well, your father usually
puts in a hard day and so do I.

Naturally at night,
we want to rest.

But that's just it.
Everybody is tired.

Too tired to live.

Mom, I don't see
how you both stand it.

If you just once
could announce dinner

without having Daddy say

he is as hungry as
a bear on an iceberg.

How can you stand it?

Mary, I've had
a very tiring day,

and sometimes you
can be very disturbing.

Now, go back to your book.

- Hi, dear.
- Hi, honey.

I'm glad to see you home.

Nice to be home.

- Hi, baby.
- Hi, Daddy.

Hi, Dad.

Jeff, old boy.

Sorry to be so late.

Tough day at the hospital.

Oh, boy, am I beat.

Ah, Mary, how was school today?

Oh, fine. I had expelled.

That's good.

Are you out of your mind?

Just testing.

How soon will dinner be ready?

In a few minutes.

We're having duck a l'orange.

Wonderful.

I can hardly wait.

I'm as hungry as
bear on an iceberg.

Jeff, will you turn the flame
down under the zucchini, please.

- Zucchini?
- Just do as you're told.

Don't tell me we're
having zucchini again.

Do as your mother asks you.

Gee, what's the matter with mom?

All of a sudden
we're having zucchini.

Something on your mind, honey?

No.

How was school today?

Daddy, you already
asked me that.

- Did I?
- Hmm-hmm.

Well, how was it?

Oh, you don't care how it was.

Why did you say that?

Well, you asked that
automatically every time

you come home.

Everything you do,
you do automatically.

I don't see what you mean.

No. I know you don't.

The same old
things over and over

until they've lost
their meaning.

Have you ever thought what
kind of a life that is for Mother?

Mary, has your mother
been saying something?

Daddy, nobody says
anything in this family.

There's no communication.

Well, let's have
a little right now.

Now, what's this
about your mother?

Oh, it's so hard
to talk about it.

Daddy, have you read any poetry?

Now, look here, young lady,
just because I'm a doctor,

it doesn't I'm illiterate.

Doctors read something
beside textbooks, you know,

when I get the time.

But you never get
the time. That's just it.

You never get time to live.

What do you think I do all
day? Don't you call that living?

Well, yes, Daddy, but your day
is over with when you come home,

but had you ever thought what
kind of a day mother's had...

Housework, laundry,
groceries, cooking?

Mary, honey, what's
your mother been saying?

"When love has
changed to kindliness."

Kindliness.

Darling.

What's the occasion?

Well, I just thought I'd
dress for dinner for a change.

You look absolutely beautiful.

Well, thank you, dear.

Shall we serve up dinner?

Well, what's this?
New Year's Eve?

Well, I just thought I'd do
something to try to change

the monotony, you know.

Yeah, I know.

I was just saying to Mary

people get tired of doing
the same thing day after day.

Maybe we should
go out to dinner.

What do you say?

Okay. Where will we go?

Not you.

Would you like to,
darling? Just the two of us.

Well, what about the duck?

Oh, I just thought you'd
rather go out to dinner.

Well, if you'd like to.

Sure.

If you'd like to.

- If you're not too tired.
- Oh, not in the least.

Unless you're too tired.

Oh, no.

Well, I'll get dressed.
I'll do it up right.

Mommy, it's really delicious.

I'm glad you like it, dear.

Oh, darling, you look divine.

Divine? Uh-oh.

Well, I suppose I should say
handsome and distinguished.

You look pretty
distinguished yourself.

Say, it's me again.

Can I stay up and
watch TV tonight?

- Oh, darling, it's...
- You can do anything you like.

Tonight, the sky is the limit.

Thanks, Dad.

- How's the duck?
- Great.

Well, don't wait
for us, you kids.

We may be out until morning.

Oh, I don't think
we'll be out that late.

Ah, don't count on it.
This is our night to howl.

Do you think Rupert
Brooke would have approved.

Momma, I know you would have.

This is our night.

Where shall we go?

Oh, I don't care. Any
place you'd like to go.

How about the Rustic
Lodge? They've got music.

- I think the Rustic Lodge
would be wonderful.
- Alright.

But that's 20 miles away.

Are you sure you
don't mind the drive?

- Oh, I'd love it.
- Alright.

I'm sorry about the
Rustic Lodge, darling.

Well, it doesn't
matter, really, dear.

Why does that place
have to close on Monday?

Are you sure you
like Italian food?

Oh, yes, I do.

- Don't you?
- Oh, yes, I do.

Kind of.

Well, it depends.

Do you think they
can squeeze us in?

Now, where would
you like to sit?

They all look the same to me.

Well, how about right here
where we can be alone?

Thank you.

Hello.

- Good evening.
- Good evening.

What do you want?

Menu, if you have one.

Thank you.

Spaghetti is very nice.

Well, I thought we'll have
something a little more...

Hey, here's something
that looks interesting,

chicken cacciatore alfredo.

Hmm. What's that?

Cacciatore alfredo is
chicken cooked with tomatoes,

a little green peppers,
a little olive oil,

a little garlic; it's very nice.

That sounds
good. I'll have that.

We don't got it.

- It says right here.
- We don't got it.

Only Monday nights.

This is Monday day.

That's what I say. Monday
night we don't got it.

I guess we'll have to pick
something else, darling?

Why don't you just order, dear.

Spaghetti is nice.

Oh, how about cannelloni?

How would that be, dear?

Anything you say, dear.

Two cannelloni.

It's got to be cooked to order.

That's fine. It's
better that day.

We're in no hurry.

I'll ask the chef.

- Good evening.
- Good evening.

Uh, evening.

Monday night is a slow night.

So, there is no cannelloni.

Oh, I see.

How about some
spaghetti with meat sauce?

Oh, it's very nice.

No. You see, this is
kind of a celebration.

Well, how about a spaghetti
without the meat sauce?

Spaghetti with clam sauce?

Spaghetti alla marinara?

Spaghetti with
butter and garlic?

You see. I told you
they don't want spaghetti.

Excuse us, please.

Well, where shall we go now?

All the other places
seemed to be closed.

Wherever you say.

I know.

What?

Something we haven't
done since we were married.

Remember? We
used to go to a diner.

I think a diner would be fine.

It should be fun,
don't you think?

Yeah, I think it'd be fun.

If you do.

Oh, I do.

Don't you?

Yes.

- Well, come on, let's go.
- All right.

Of course, we're not
exactly dressed for it.

Oh, who cares?
This is our night.

Excuse me, please.

Would you mind moving over
one so we could sit together.

I say, would you
mind moving over one

so we could sit
together, please.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Rocky boxing beautifully,
holding him off with that jab...

Well?

What would you like, darling?

Do you have a menu?

I'll have a hamburger.

Yeah, I guess
you will, so will I.

Two hamburgers, please.

- Rare.
- Rare.

This is kind of fun, isn't it?

Yes, it is.

- It's sort of like old times.
- Uh-huh.

I guess, I'm the
only woman in here.

Oh, don't let it bother you.

Now the referee is warning
Rocky about those rabbit punches.

I feel as if I was wearing a
bathing suit or something.

You sure got good taste, Mack.

Oh, thank you.

You know, if you're
smart, you'll marry her.

That's what I keep telling
him but he don't listen.

A good-looking babe like
you don't have to worry.

You could have your
pick any guy here.

You're very flattering.

Three, four. He may not get up.

Oh, that was quick.

Ah, he must have seen us coming.

Oh, no potatoes for me, please.

Leave them.

If you don't want
them, pass them over.

- Thanks.
- You're welcome.

You call this rare?

That's what you
asked for, ain't it?

I asked for it but
what did I get?

It's gonna need some
catsup to loosen them up.

Do you have some catsup, please?

What kind of catsup is that?

That is a thinking man's catsup.

Oh, would you
like some, darling?

I don't really think so, dear.

Rocky in trouble
again, trying to hold on.

Now, the referee finally
breaks them apart.

Oh, uh, waiter.

Deaf?

Hey, chief.

Can we have the check, please.

Eh, you don't
like the food, huh?

Oh, we found we
weren't very hungry.

We had a late breakfast.

A dollar ten.

Boy, is the crowd loving this.

They came to see a fight
and that's what they're seeing.

A real crowd pleaser.

- Good night.
- Do hurry back.

You marry her. She's okay.

Boy, I'm glad to
be out of that place.

So am I.

I'm kind of sorry we passed
up that duck you made.

It didn't look
pretty good, did it?

Would you like to go to a movie?

Yes, sure, if you'd like to.

You wouldn't like to go
to a movie neither would I.

Honey, we could go home.

At nine o'clock in the evening.
What will we tell the kids?

Well, we could sneak
in the back door.

They'll be looking
at television.

Why should we
sneak? It's our house.

Jeff consumed the whole duck.

I think we can safely
assume it was mostly Jeff.

Well, it was nice of him to put
the bones back in the refrigerator.

What do we have up here?

Ice cream.

Pickles.

Oh, Alex, not pickles
with ice cream.

Why not? It's a
tasty combination.

You call yourself a doctor.

Uh, you have a lot of
superstition about that stuff.

Oh, great, coleslaw,
pork and beans.

- Here's some ham
and green peppers.
- Hey.

- Can you handle more?
- Yeah.

It's a feast. Keep it coming.

I've got some pumpernickel, too.

That's a final touch of elegance

no Roman emperor
ever had it better.

- You tell me something.
- What?

What were we doing running
around town on a Monday night?

Honey, I don't know.

Who started all of this anyway?

I didn't.

Well, I didn't.

I thought you were
getting stir crazy.

I thought you were.

- Me?
- Yes.

The last thing in the
world I wanted to do

was to go out tonight.

I was dead on my feet.

So was I. I was exhausted.

- I have a wonderful idea.
- What?

Why don't we just relax
and watch old movies on TV.

Oh, honey, that's
a wonderful idea.

We never do that.

What time do they go on?

- They never stop.
- Oh, great.

I'll bring a few goodies
in case we get hungry.

Now, come on, honey.

I want to get very comfortable.

Why don't we do this more often?

I mean, it's there all the time.

This is silly.

There's always
some kid in front of it.

- Are you comfy?
- Hmm-hmm.

- You?
- Hmm-hmm.

Go ahead and
yawn. It's your house.

Thank you, dear.

Honey, you forgot
to turn the set on.

Excuse me.

There's a note here.

"The TV is busted.
I didn't do it. Jeff."

That's why they went to bed.

Oh, there is nothing left
but rest and do the same.

Well, why not.

- You know something?
- What?

We shouldn't have
done this in the first place.

Oh, Alex.

- Good night, sweetheart.
- Good night, honey.

And Mack, I'm glad
you married me.

It's okay, babe.

- Oh...
- Oh, boy.

Oh, honey.

We forgot to say
goodnight to the kids.

Oh, why wake them.

We'll say goodnight
in the morning.

I guess you're right.

Alex.

Hmm.

I hear something?

Go to sleep, darling.

I do.

I think somebody is trying
to break into the house.

Be careful, dear.

Who's down there?

It's just us, Daddy.

What are they doing home?

What are you doing
coming at this hour?

Gee, dad. It's
only quarter to ten.

It is.

Oh, yeah. The TV didn't work...

We didn't think you'd
be home this early.

What happened? Where did you go?

Oh, we went to lots of places.

- Didn't we?
- Yes.

Yes, we did.

First, we took a romantic
drive to the Rustic Lodge.

What a moon.

Yes.

And then we went to
this perfectly delightful

Italian restaurant.

Italian music in the
background, candlelight.

Oh, Daddy.

And then we finished up the
evening by going to a diner.

Your mother was
the center of all eyes,

easily the most
beautiful woman there.

Well, it all sounds so exciting.

It doesn't sound exciting to me.

Jeff, you're so mundane.

Well, now, look.
Tomorrow is a school day.

- Now, come on, off to bed.
- Yeah. School tomorrow.

Up you go.

Mommy, I was wrong.

You and Daddy are romantic.

What a perfect evening.

- Good night, Daddy.
- Good night, honey.

Good night, sweetheart.

Good night, Guinevere.

Good night, Galahad.