The Donna Reed Show (1958–1966): Season 2, Episode 19 - Just a Housewife - full transcript

Stopped for an interview by a gimmicky showman at a grocery store, Donna makes a stand for women who often say they are just a housewife. Stay at home mothers are more than just stay at home people.

Hello again.

Direct from McClure's
Supermarket,

we present The
Housewives Corner.

The radio show that
brings you laughs, tears

to say nothing of bargains.

And the man who comes
into your home every morning

right after your husband
has left for work, Jerry Parker.

Ha-ha-ha-ha.

My, he is a happy one, isn't he?

His teeth light up
when he smiles.

Here's one right over here.
May I ask your name, Madam?



Or should I say miss?

It's Mrs. Dorothy Burns.

Oh, every time I
interview a charming lady,

she turns out to be
married, all except my wife.

Of course my wife
is really married.

Only joking dear.

And what do you do, Mrs. Burns?

- Oh, I'm just a housewife, Jerry.
- I see.

Do you ever noticed how
women seem to apologize

when they say that?

The city council is considering
using one-way streets

during the rush hour.

Do you have any opinion on that?

Well, I think, Jerry,
doing the experiment,



it might cut down
on traffic accidents.

It's worth trying.

Well, how about that, huh?

Well, thank you very
much, Mrs. Burns.

And don't go away now because

McClure's would like you to
have this little remembrance.

Oh, thank you.

And thank you very
much, Mrs. Burns.

Uh, uh. Jerry Parker
makes the jokes around here.

May I have your
name, little lady?

Donna Stone.

I'm married and I
have two children.

- And you're a housewife?
- Well...

Oh, now, don't tell me
you're a spy for the FBI.

Well, what I meant
was I'm a housewife.

Well, we got that out of you.

Now, Mrs. Stone, we
realize that housewives

mold public opinion

and are instrumental in
shaping our national policies.

Now, I have a question
I'd like to ask you

but it's very important,

and before you answer I
want you to think very carefully.

Are you ready? All right.

While baking an
upside-down cake,

do you recommend
standing on your head?

That super silly has air,

well, I never did
trust people who are

always laughing anyway.

Oh, honey.

Men don't say "I'm
just a salesman"

or "I'm just a scientist,"

and you don't say
you're just a doctor.

Darling, housewife is a
word like a mother or moon or

anti-disestablishmenterianism.

Mother is a wonderful word,
and there's only one moon

and for anti-disestab...

Honey, why take
exception to a word.

You are a housewife.

But not the way he used it.

Laughing boy makes it
sound like a faceless glob.

Book, pencil,

chair,

housewife.

Housewife is like a chair?

Let me start again.

Stethoscope.

Even chairs have
distinct personalities.

I mean, they have
different shapes,

different numbers of legs.

Well, housewives have
different personalities,

different shapes.

Oh, I guess, they do have the
same number of legs in common.

You see. You're going
to say that's just a chair.

Are you saying that you
object to keeping house?

Darling, somehow I have a
feeling you wouldn't understand.

Come to me with
your problems anytime.

Alex, it isn't that I object
to doing housework.

I just don't want to be
known as "just a housewife."

Well, since you find
the word so offensive,

why don't we call you
Mistress of the Main Eye?

Well, anything.

Housewives sounds like

wet sand, dropping on wet sand.

I promise you that nasty word

will never be mentioned
in this house again.

Well, thank you, dear.

You've struck a blow for
housewives everywhere.

I had a suffragette grandmother

who used to handcuff
herself to a lamppost.

And now, Maharani of the Mop,

don't you think it's
about time to start dinner?

Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.

- Hello, dear.
- Hi, Jeff.

How was school?

Oh, I'm just a day
smarter, I guess.

Hmm. It shows.

Hey. Will you and
dad sign this, please?

Sure. What is it?

Oh, it's just a questionnaire.

The Board of Education
is taking a survey.

Guys, go ahead and
sign and I'll fill out the rest.

All right.

Father, pediatrician.

Mother...

Mom, are you anything
or just a housewife?

What did I say?

Oh nothing, dear.

I was just trying to explain
something to your father,

and you summed it up perfectly.

Jeff, you don't understand.

It's that men have
more opportunities.

It's got nothing to
do with opportunities.

Men are smarter. That's all.

Nothing personal, Mom.

Oh, I know, dear.

You're never
personal, just blunt.

Why didn't a woman
discover America?

Well, why didn't Columbus
take his wife along on the trip?

Come to think of it, we don't
hear much of Mrs. Columbus.

She probably had to stay home

because there was a
sale on onions in Lisbon.

Even the history admits that
behind every man who accomplish

something worthwhile
there was a woman.

Yeah, I know, nagging him.

Nothing personal, Mom.

Oh, I know, dear.

Jeff, I think historians
prefer the word inspire.

I like nag better.

I'm sure Mrs. Edison
said to her husband,

"Instead of sitting
around the house,

why don't you invent
the electric bulb."

Well, things are different now.

The modern woman will no
longer be chained to the stove.

You broke lose again.

Mary, have you ever noticed

that when you get on a
serious subject with men,

all they do is adopt
the superior attitude.

I know. You start a serious
discussion with a boy

and he acts as if you should
be home baking a cake.

Jeff, what's new?

- Oh, not much. What's new with you?
- Well...

I agree with you, Mother.
Housewife is such a blah word.

From now on, please,
address your mother as

Princess of the Pantry.

I believe it's your serve.

Mary, we'll leave the
men to their cigars,

brandy and dishes while
we chat in the living room.

A wonderful idea, Mother.

Excuse us, dear.

You know, I believe
that within 10 years,

we will have a woman president.

Well, it's about time, isn't it?

And as soon as
we get into office,

the first thing we'll do is take
the vote away from the men.

How did we get into this mess?

Don't ask me. I'm
only a husband.

Grab a towel.

- Good night, Momma.
- Good night, Mary.

Good night, Father.

Good night, son.

Son, I hate to tell you this
but you have dishpan hands.

So have you.

Well, you better get used to it

because you're going to be doing
the dishes for one whole week.

Nothing personal, dear.

- Good night, Daddy.
- Good night, Mom.

- Good night.
- Good night, sweetheart.

Darling, you didn't really mean

what you said about
the dishes, did you?

Didn't I?

I want you to know how it
feels just to be just a housewife.

Oh, look, dear.

You live here in the house, hmm,

and you're my wife.

Oh, Alex.

But I want you to
know that in spite of that

I've never thought of
you as just a housewife.

Why, thank you, dear.

At the moment, that's the
nicest thing you could say.

Darling, do you have
any coffee ready?

- Yes, I just made some.
- Good.

What do you do to get
some of these mothers

to bring their children
in for polio shots.

Oh. Oh, that's too bad.

Papers had been
saying how important it is.

Mrs. Stockton brought Ricky
in today three weeks late.

Just forgot.

Well, I can understand.

I called her myself twice.

Well, she just probably
had so much to do.

She couldn't get around to it.

Oh, it's inexcusable.

After all, she doesn't have
to go to an office every day.

She is only a housewife...

Go ahead, say it.

All right. I'll say it. She
is only a housewife.

Now, Donna.

I know you're
sensitive to the word

but how else do I
describe a woman

who stays home, runs a house,

cooks, cleans,
looks after the kids?

How about mule?

I've never known
you to be like this.

That's true.

Oh.

Thanks for the coffee.

Don't mention it, Master.

Housewife, housewife, housewife.

Housewife, housewife, housewife.

Mother, something wrong?

No. I just have
to get this fixed.

- Good morning, Madam.
- Good morning.

Madam, my company is
introducing a new product.

And naturally, we want a
reaction from the people

who will eventually use it.

Now, as a typical housewife,

we feel that you should get
this mop a new chance to prove...

Thank you, Madam.

Now, don't go away
because McClure's Market

wants you to
have this little gift.

Oh, and when your husband
comes home from work tonight,

give him the shock of his life.

Greet him with a smile.

And now, I'd like to thank
all the wonderful ladies

who wrote me all the letters

to tell me how much
they enjoyed my program

and especially the
writer of this letter.

Oh Madam, what are you saying?

Oh, Madam, may I have your name?

I'm Mrs. Joan Standish.

And what do you
do, Mrs. Standish?

I'm a housewife.

And did you major in housewifing
when you went to school?

Well, I started out to
be an anthropologist but,

you know, how it is?

You go off and get
married and have children.

Oh, so you're stuck?

Oh, I wouldn't say that.

Oh, I'm only kidding,
Mrs. Standish.

Now, I'd like to ask you
a very important question.

If you had to pick
one outstanding quality

in a man you're about to marry,

what would it be?

Well, I think a sense
of humor, Jerry.

Well, that's very interesting.

Of course, you know,
most men stop laughing

after they get married.

But, thank you very
much, Mrs. Standish.

And before you go,
McClure's Market

wants you to
have this little gift.

Thank you.

And thank you, Mrs. Standish.

Well, well, if it isn't
our little housewife

who makes the upside-down cakes.

Welcome back to the
Housewife's Corner.

Oh, I have another startling
question for you today.

Now, listen carefully.
When a housewife...

Mr. Parker,

what do you mean when
you say "housewife?"

Everybody knows what I
mean when I say housewife.

Well, then tell
me. I'd like to hear.

Well, a housewife is a...

Well, she takes
care of the children.

Well then, she is a
nurse for one thing.

What else is a housewife?

Well, a housewife
solves all the problems

that come up around the house.

Well, then, she
is a psychologist.

Now, when you
come home at night,

does your wife discuss
your show with you?

Oh, yes. Yes. She
is very intelligent.

She just loves it.

Well, then, she is a diplomat.

Well, thank you very much.
It's been very pleasant.

Mr. Parker, I'm
just trying to say

that every housewife
has a personality.

We're not part of a heard,
we're not just housewives.

Well, I never said that.

Now, tell me, when
things go wrong,

does your wife manage
to say just the right thing

to make you feel
that all isn't lost?

Sure. But-...

Well, then, she
is a philosopher.

Look, lady, what are
you trying to prove?

Mr. Parker, I'm
just trying to prove

that you can't use the
word housewife as a label.

Every woman you call
"just a housewife" is a nurse,

a psychologist, a
diplomat, and a philosopher.

Isn't it true, Mr. Parker?

- Well, I...
- Isn't it true?

Well, yes. Yes, it is.

Thank you very much for
answering that question.

Oh, here, McClure's
would like you to have this

for being such a grand sport.

- Hi, Jim.
- Hello, Alex.

Who do you think was
on the radio this afternoon

very important?

Who? The president?

For this program, I think
they'd preempt the president.

Donna.

- My Donna?
- Your Donna.

After this afternoon, I think
she belongs to the world.

What was Donna
doing on the radio?

Rearranging the world.

What?

Well, my wife wasn't too clear,
but I think Donna advocated

that all housewives leave
home, husband and children.

Ah, she was on Jerry
Parker's program.

The way I hear it, it
was Donna's program.

Well, you see, Donna
gets a little wound up.

Wound up?

It's the understatement
of the year.

Tell me, Alex,

what it's like to have a
Carrie Nation in the house?

Oh, you're making a
big thing out of this, Jim.

Donna speaks her mind
on some little radio show

that nobody even listens to
and you make it sound as if...

- Hi, Jim.
- Hi, Sam.

Say, Alex, have you
heard about Donna?

I told him.

I heard her in the car when
Marian was driving me down.

Whoa.

Did she let us husbands have it?

Ah, she let up a little steam.
It doesn't mean a thing.

No?

Well, Marian wants to
have a long talk with me

when I get home.

Well, you fellows
are battle scared,

but I'd just been
married three months.

I'll hear plenty from my
wife when I get home.

Come on, fellows.
Enough is enough.

Well, how do we handle
this with our wives?

- Well, it seems to
me— - Oh, not you, Alex.

You can't even
handle your own wife.

Jim, what do we do?

What do we do? We
make a firm stand.

We take the position that
men have traditionally taken.

When an issue arises,

that goes to the heart
of the basic relationship

between husband and wife,

we surrender.

Ms. Cartwright, I gathered you
heard Mrs. Stone on the radio.

Yes, I did,

and I absolutely agree with her.

The revolt is
sweeping the country.

Tell me, Ms.
Cartwright, as a nurse,

what is your objection
to the word "housewife"?

I just want to make sure
that when I become one,

I won't be one.

You men.

And your Donna
started all of this.

Yes, Louise.

Oh.

Well, I'm so glad
you agreed with me.

Yeah. Yes.

What?

Would I speak at your club?

Well... yes, I think so, but...

Well, let me call
tomorrow and discuss it.

All right, Louise,
thank you for calling.

Good bye.

Hello?

Yes, Olive.

You did?

Really?

Oh.

Well, thank you
for calling to tell me.

Good bye, Olive.

Oh my.

Donna!

Donna, you were
absolutely magnificent.

Oh, well, everybody
has been calling,

even strangers.

I tried calling for over an
hour but your line was busy.

Oh, I may have to have
a switchboard put in.

Isn't it dreadful?

Dreadful?

Why, it's just the biggest
thing that's happened

since the bloomer girls.

Well, what did I say?

What did you say?

What did Lincoln
say at Gettysburg?

The emancipation of women.

Donna, don't you
realized that tonight

when every husband gets home,

he is going to have
new respect for his wife.

Doris, do you really think so?

I know so.

Psychologist,
diplomat, philosopher.

Your public, no doubt.

Can I get it?

Hello?

No, it's Doris.

Oh, hi, Ruth.

Yes, wasn't she is just great.

Well, you bet, I'll tell her.

Okay. Bye now.

Ruth's husband is taking
her out to dinner tonight

for the first time
in a whole year.

Well, maybe it's
just their anniversary.

No. It's you.

You've liberated us.

Oh, Donna, we
have the men worried.

Well, Doris, I just didn't
like the way a few people

use the word "housewife".

I didn't want to
start a revolution.

Wow!

- Wow, what?
- Wowie.

You see. Even your
son is impressed.

Well, don't tell me they
interrupted your history class

so you could hear
me on the radio.

Oh no. One of the
guys heard you.

He said you were scrapper.

Oh, Jeff, I wasn't scrapping.

I merely expressed an opinion.

Well, I know but
that's what starts wars.

I hear you almost
slugged Jerry Parker.

Oh, for heaven sake.

Isn't it wonderful?
Oh, I have to go.

- I want to be home
when Johnny gets there.
- All right.

- Keep up the good work.
- Oh, thank you, dear.

- Good bye, Jeff.
- Bye.

Donna.

- Hi, Mrs. Mason.
- Hello, dear.

- Oh, mother.
- Hi, Mary.

Oh, anything I've
done recently dear.

Oh, mother, all the girls
are talking about you.

Did they really have
to cut you off on the air?

I heard there was
a riot at the store.

And to think if I haven't
run out of sugar and olive oil,

I'd still be an
obscure housewife.

Mother, we women don't
get a chance very often

be a Joan of Arc or a
Florence Nightingale.

And it happened to
me in the supermarket.

Oh, I get it.

Hello?

Yeah, she is home.

Just a second, please.

Mom, it's a guy
from the newspaper.

I think he wants to have
an interview with you.

Thanks, dear. Hello?

Yes.

Oh, tomorrow
afternoon would be fine.

Thank you.

Oh, pictures, too.

Well, thank you very much.

Good bye.

Mom, I wonder if Daddy knows.

- I'll call him at the hospital.
- Oh, no, no.

I don't think you should
bother Daddy at the hospital.

But Mother, this is
the most exciting thing

that has happened in years.

Hello?

Yes, Margaret.

Oh, you did. Really?

Oh, how nice of you to call.

Daddy, did they talk
about Mom at the hospital?

Talk about her?

During the show they
had the radio on in surgery.

- Mom had thousands
of phone calls.
- Oh.

Hello, dear.

Oh, is something wrong?

No. No, I just didn't expect
to find the same simple girl

who said good bye
to me this morning.

Daddy, you know every
woman's club in town

wants Mom to make a speech.

I think they'd want her
to run for mayor even.

It's getting late, children.

- We'll discuss my
political future tomorrow.
- Okay.

Good night, Mom.
Good night, Dad.

- Good night, Dad.
- Good night, Jeff.

Have you had dinner, dear.

Yeah. Thank you, darling.

Thousands of phone calls, huh.

Your radio speech
seems to have stirred up

the entire female
population of Hilldale.

Oh, it wasn't nothing serious.

Just a bunch of ex-housewives.

Things can never be the same.

You got a new role in the
community and at home.

I don't know about that.

It's been 15 wonderful years,

and I'll always be
grateful for them.

Thank you, dear.

- Donna.
- Yes, dear.

In view of the
changed circumstances,

I'm not sure I
ought to ask this.

It's, uh... it's
sort of personal.

Well, go ahead, dear.

We used to be very
close remember.

Do I have a fresh
pair of pajamas?

I'll never forget the
first time I met you.

You're looking so pretty

and kind of frightened
of the big city.

And now, you're the
leader of a crusade

that could change the entire...

Darling, you're not
being at all reasonable.

You're just angry because I
spoke my mind on that radio show

and everybody agrees with me.

I'm not angry.

I'm just trying to tell you
that nothing has changed.

You have not
accomplished a thing.

What about all those
people who called me?

Oh, they have forgotten the
whole thing in a couple of days

and so will you,

and everything will
just like it was before.

Mom, the Jerry
Parker Show is on.

Will you listen to him, dear.

He is not exactly
my favorite program.

He says he has an important
announcement to make.

Listen.

And since yesterday,

we have been
swamped with letters,

telegrams and phone calls

all in complete agreement
with sentiments expressed here

about housewives by Mrs. Stone.

So because it's
always been my policy

to satisfy the
wishes of my viewers.

This program will
no longer be called

The Housewives' Corner.

Instead, it will be known
as The Shopper's Hour—

Mother, you did it.

Mom, you're nagging paid off.

And now for our first guest.

I think we had this
lady on our show before.

Yes, I always shop here.

And what do you do? May I ask?

Oh, I'm just a housewife, Jerry.

With all you've done, Mother.

I'll get it.

Good afternoon, Madam.

Oh, it's you.

I'm sorry about slamming
the door on you yesterday.

Oh, that's all right, lady.

It's an occupational hazard.

Oh, but, I'm not
selling anything today.

My company wants me to
find out some information.

We're trying to find
out from you ladies

what word you
would like us to use

instead of housewife.

Really?

Why are they doing that?

I don't know.

Our sales manager, some
screwy dame over the radio,

you know, some nut.

Seems she was sounding off...