The Brady Bunch (1969–1974): Season 5, Episode 7 - Marcia Gets Creamed - full transcript

♪ HERE'S THE STORY ♪

♪ OF A LOVELY LADY ♪

♪ WHO WAS BRINGING UP
THREE VERY LOVELY GIRLS ♪

♪ ALL OF THEM HAD HAIR OF GOLD ♪

♪ LIKE THEIR MOTHER ♪

♪ THE YOUNGEST ONE IN CURLS ♪

♪ IT'S THE STORY OF
A MAN NAMED BRADY ♪

♪ WHO WAS BUSY WITH
THREE BOYS OF HIS OWN ♪

♪ THEY WERE FOUR MEN
LIVING ALL TOGETHER ♪

♪ YET THEY WERE ALL ALONE ♪

♪ TILL THE ONE DAY WHEN
THE LADY MET THIS FELLOW ♪



♪ AND THEY KNEW THAT IT WAS
MUCH MORE THAN A HUNCH ♪

♪ THAT THIS GROUP MUST
SOMEHOW FORM A FAMILY ♪

♪ THAT'S THE WAY WE ALL
BECAME THE BRADY BUNCH ♪

♪ THE BRADY BUNCH ♪

♪ THE BRADY BUNCH ♪

♪ THAT'S THE WAY WE
BECAME THE BRADY BUNCH ♪

HI, PETE.

STRUCK OUT AGAIN, HUH?

I'LL BE AS OLD AS YOU
BEFORE I FIND A JOB.

WHY DON'T YOU BECOME A BRAIN
SURGEON? THEY MAKE LOTS OF LOOT.

[chuckles]

HANG IN THERE. SOMETHING'S
BOUND TO TURN UP.

BUT I NEED A STEREO TAPE DECK

WITH 4 SPEAKERS RIGHT NOW.



HEY!

WAIT TILL YOU HEAR
WHAT JUST HAPPENED.

WHAT? ON THE WAY TO THE LIBRARY,

I WAS PASSING
HASKELL'S ICE CREAM HUT

AND MR. HASKELL WAS PUTTING
UP A SIGN IN THE WINDOW:

"HELP WANTED, PART-TIME."

WOW! THANKS, MARCIA.

I BETTER GET RIGHT DOWN THERE.

(Marcia) IT'S TOO LATE.

WHAT?

THE JOB'S ALREADY TAKEN.

BY WHO? ME.

YOU?

SURE.

ISN'T ANYBODY GOING
TO CONGRATULATE ME?

WELL, I WILL, BUT I WOULDN'T
COUNT TOO HEAVILY ON PETER.

WHY?

I'VE BEEN LOOKING
FOR A JOB ALL WEEK.

I'M SORRY, PETE.

I JUST HAPPENED TO BE IN THE
RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME.

YEAH, SURE.

HEY, THERE'S JAN. JAN!

WAIT'LL I TELL HER
THE GREAT NEWS.

I DON'T GET IT.

I WORE OUT A PAIR OF BIKE TIRES

LOOKING FOR A JOB ALL OVER TOWN,

AND ONE FALLS RIGHT IN HER LAP.

SOME PEOPLE GET ALL THE LUCK.

[cycle crashing]

HOW'S THAT?

MAKE 'EM SHINIER.

[spits]

WHAT ARE YOU TWO
DOING WITH MY SHOES?

WE'RE POLISHING 'EM.

WHY?

TO SHOW YOU HOW
MUCH WE APPRECIATE YOU.

THIS WOULDN'T HAVE ANYTHING
TO DO WITH MY NEW JOB, WOULD IT?

WHAT NEW JOB?

WE DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT
MARCIA HAVING A NEW JOB, DO WE, CINDY?

NO.

OH, WELL, IT'S GOING
TO BE VERY EXCITING.

YOU SEE, I GET TO WORK
IN A HARDWARE STORE.

HARDWARE STORE?

WE THOUGHT YOU WERE
WORKING IN AN ICE CREAM PARLOR.

DIDN'T KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT IT, HUH?

WELL, WE MIGHT
HAVE HEARD A RUMOR.

AND IF YOU THINK WE'RE
POLISHING YOUR SHOES

JUST FOR FREE ICE CREAM...

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.

MMM-HMM.

HOW LONG BEFORE DINNER?

NOT LONG NOW.

HERE'S SOMETHING
FOR ME RIGHT NOW.

CARROTS AND LETTUCE.

I'M BEGINNING TO GET PINK EYES

AND A TWITCHY LITTLE NOSE.

MEAT IS BUT A MEMORY.

WELL, REMEMBER
WHAT I SAID, ALICE?

WILLPOWER, IT'S ALL IN THE HEAD.

OH, NO, HONEY, THAT'S
NOT WHERE IT'S AT.

YOU'RE WAY
OFF-TARGET, MR. BRADY.

I GUESS DIETING IS JUST EASIER
FOR SOME PEOPLE THAN IT IS OTHERS.

YEAH, FOR ME IT'D BE A CINCH.

BUT FORTUNATELY I DON'T HAVE TO

BECAUSE I HAVE NOT GAINED
AN OUNCE SINCE COLLEGE.

NOT AN OUNCE, HUH?

NOPE. NOT AN OUNCE.

UH, HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN
SINCE YOU WEIGHED YOURSELF?

I DON'T HAVE TO WEIGH
MYSELF. I CAN FEEL IT.

MMM-HMM. ALICE,
THE SCALE, PLEASE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH
A SCALE IN THE KITCHEN?

THAT'S TO KEEP ME SEMI-HONEST.

WHENEVER I FEEL LIKE
CHEATING ON MY DIET,

I WEIGH MYSELF.

AND THEN I CHEAT ANYWAY.

COME ON. ON THE SCALE.

OH, HONEY, WHAT'S THE POINT?
I TOLD YOU, NOT AN OUNCE.

OH, YOU'RE JUST CHICKEN!

NO, I'M NOT CHICKEN.

PLEASE DON'T TALK ABOUT FOOD.

COME ON, ON THE
SCALE. THERE YOU GO.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

YOU HAVEN'T GAINED AN OUNCE.

YOU GAINED 7 POUNDS! EXACTLY.

WAIT A MINUTE, YOU'VE GOT
TO ALLOW FOR MY CLOTHES.

ALL RIGHT, WE'LL ALLOW ABOUT,
UH, 4 POUNDS FOR CLOTHES.

YOU STILL HAVE 3 EXTRA POUNDS.

WHAT'S 3 POUNDS?

LISTEN, IF I WANT TO, I
COULD LOSE IT LIKE THAT.

OH, IF I COULD
LOSE IT LIKE THAT,

I'D BE A SPANISH DANCER.

HONEY, WHY DON'T YOU
SHOW ALICE HOW IT'S DONE?

WHAT?

WILLPOWER. REMEMBER?

OH, MR. BRADY, IT WOULD
BE SO MUCH EASIER

IF WE WERE BOTH ON A DIET.

YEAH, BUT WHAT ABOUT DINNER?

I MEAN, THE POT ROAST,

THE BUTTERED NOODLES
AND THE BISCUITS AND...

HAVE A BAG OF WILLPOWER.

[doorbell rings]

HI. HI. COME ON IN.

OH, THANKS, BUT I JUST
STOPPED BY FOR A MINUTE.

OH, OK.

HI. HI.

LISTEN, ABOUT TOMORROW,

DO YOU WANT TO MEET ME AT THE
TENNIS COURT OR SHOULD I PICK YOU UP?

I'M SORRY, JEFF.

I'LL HAVE TO BREAK OUR DATE.

TOMORROW I START A NEW
JOB AT HASKELL'S ICE CREAM HUT.

YEAH, BUT I RESERVED THE
COURT AND EVERYTHING.

I'M JUST AS
DISAPPOINTED AS YOU ARE.

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY:
"BUSINESS BEFORE PLEASURE."

YEAH, THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY.

LOOK, WHY DON'T YOU
MAKE A RESERVATION

FOR US TO PLAY SOME NIGHT?

I GET OFF WORK AT 6:00.

YEAH, OK. I'LL BE IN TOUCH.

OK. BYE-BYE.

BOY, AM I FAMISHED.

THAT LITTLE BAG OF VEGETABLES
LAST NIGHT DIDN'T GO VERY FAR.

ALICE, MR. BRADY IS FAMISHED.

BREAKFAST COMING RIGHT UP.

I WILL HAVE MY EGGS
LIGHTLY BASTED.

BREAKFAST IS SERVED, MR. BRADY.

WHAT'S THAT?

BREAKFAST.

DRY TOAST AND COFFEE?

IT ISN'T ENOUGH TO KEEP
A HUMMINGBIRD ALIVE.

IT IS IF THE HUMMINGBIRD
HAS WILLPOWER.

[exclaims]

CREAM IS A NO-NO.

WELL, THAT FIGURES.

AND JAM IS A DOUBLE NO-NO.

IS THERE ANYTHING AROUND
HERE THAT'S A YES-YES?

I WOULD SETTLE
FOR A MAYBE-MAYBE.

WHAT'S THIS? LUNCH.

SINCE WHEN DO I TAKE
MY LUNCH TO WORK?

UH, SINCE YOU
STEPPED ON THAT SCALE.

AN APPLE, 2 CRACKERS AND
A LITTLE PIECE OF CHEESE?

THAT'S A FULL OUNCE OF CHEESE.

HOW DID I GET INTO THIS?

YOU AND YOUR BIG FAT WILLPOWER.

HERE YOU ARE.

WE CAN GET CONES THIS
BIG ANYPLACE IN TOWN.

YOU ONLY PAID FOR
A SINGLE SCOOP.

YES, BUT WE'RE RELATIVES.

MARCIA, LOOK AT
THOSE SKIMPY CONES.

THAT'S NO WAY TO
TREAT THE FAMILY.

LET ME HAVE THEM.

GIVE ME THE CONES.

HERE, I'LL TAKE CARE OF THEM.

(Haskell) THERE.

MAYBE A LITTLE MORE HERE.

MAYBE A LITTLE MORE THERE.

HERE YOU ARE,
KIDS. LIVE A LITTLE.

THANKS.

FROM NOW ON, YOU
GET ALL OUR BUSINESS.

UH, KIDS, WHY DON'T YOU
TRY A SEAT AT THE TABLE?

FOR YOU.

COMPLIMENTS OF THE HOUSE.

NO, THANKS,
MR. HASKELL. I'M ON A DIET.

IT'S MY NEWEST CREATION:

PINEAPPLE-RASPBERRY RHAPSODY.

USE YOUR WILLPOWER, ALICE.

COME ON. ONE SPOONFUL.

YOU'LL LOVE IT.

REMEMBER YOUR DIET, ALICE.

REMEMBER YOUR HIPS, ALICE.

I'LL WAIT FOR YOU KIDS OUTSIDE.

HI. HOW'S IT GOING?

HI. BUSY, BUT I LOVE IT.

I HOPE YOU HAVE ENOUGH STRENGTH
LEFT FOR OUR TENNIS DATE TONIGHT.

WELL, I'VE GOT THE STRENGTH,
BUT I DON'T HAVE THE TIME.

WELL, I THOUGHT YOU
SAID YOU GET OFF AT 6:00.

I DO, BUT THIS JOB'S PUT
ME BEHIND SCHEDULE.

I'VE GOT TO WRITE A BOOK REPORT.

WOW, BETWEEN
THIS JOB AND SCHOOL,

THERE'S NO TIME LEFT FOR ME.

I'M SORRY, JEFF.

JUST AS SOON AS I GET CAUGHT UP,

WE'LL HAVE LOTS
OF TIME TOGETHER.

EXCUSE ME. OK?

I'LL BE RIGHT WITH YOU.

HOW'S THE JOB HUNTING?

ZERO.

I'VE DEVOTED 9 YEARS
OF MY LIFE TO EDUCATION

AND ALL I'M QUALIFIED TO DO
IS FILL OUT JOB APPLICATIONS.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S
GOT INTO THIS BROOM.

20 YEARS AGO, IT
SWEPT BY ITSELF.

IT GLIDED, IT SKIPPED.

MR. HASKELL, MAYBE
IT'S NOT THE BROOM.

YOU'RE HERE MORNING,
NOON AND NIGHT.

WHY DON'T YOU
SLOW DOWN A LITTLE?

MARCIA, IN THE ICE
CREAM BUSINESS,

WHEN YOU SLOW DOWN, YOU MELT.

MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

MAYBE I SHOULD TAKE
AFTERNOONS OFF, FIND A HOBBY.

THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.

SO WHERE AM I GOING TO
FIND A HELPER AS GOOD AS YOU?

WELL, I KNOW SOMEONE
VERY MUCH LIKE ME

AND HE DOES NEED A JOB.

SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU?

CLOSE ENOUGH TO BE MY BROTHER.

IN FACT, IT IS MY BROTHER.

GOOD. IF ONE BRADY IS
GOOD, THEN 2 ARE BETTER.

EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY,

YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF
THE AFTERNOON SHIFT.

ME?

THANKS.

WELL, HERE GOES MY FIRST
AFTERNOON OFF IN 20 YEARS.

I'M GOING TO RELAX,
EVEN IF IT KILLS ME.

MARCIA, YOU'RE THE GREATEST, MOST
FANTASTIC SISTER A GUY EVER HAD.

THANKS, BUT LET'S NOT OVERDO IT.

NO, I'M SERIOUS. YOU'RE SUPER.

YOU'RE MAKING IT POSSIBLE

FOR ME TO GET THAT
NEW STEREO TAPE DECK.

WELL?

WELL, WHAT?

AREN'T YOU GOING TO FINISH
WIPING THE REST OF THE COUNTER?

SURE. RIGHT AFTER I
TAKE AN ICE CREAM BREAK.

PETER, WHAT DO YOU
THINK YOU'RE DOING?

WHO LOOKS UNDER TABLES?

I DO.

BE MY GUEST.

FEET UP.

THAT'S RIGHT, KEVIN.

I'M A REAL WORKING MAN NOW.

YOU OUGHT TO TRY IT SOMETIME.

PETER, YOU'VE BEEN ON
THAT PHONE ALL AFTERNOON.

UH-HUH.

COME ON. WE'VE GOT WORK TO DO.

I CAN'T CUT KEVIN OFF
RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE.

IT WOULDN'T BE POLITE.

WHAT WERE YOU SAYING, KEVIN?

NOW LOOK, I AM NOT KIDDING.

GET OFF THAT PHONE NOW.

GOT TO GO, KEVIN.
OK, I'LL SEE YOU.

WHAT'S THE BIG HASSLE?

YOU AND YOUR GOOFING OFF.

NOW HOW ABOUT HELPING ME
DUST SOME OF THESE SHELVES?

OH, YEAH, SURE.

JUST DON'T GET SO SHOOK.

I'LL GET ON IT RIGHT AWAY.

JUST AS SOON AS I MAKE
ONE MORE PHONE CALL.

THANK YOU.

[chattering on radio]

[people cheering on radio]

[crowd chanting] WE
WANT A TOUCHDOWN!

WE WANT A TOUCHDOWN!

WE WANT A TOUCHDOWN!

WE WANT A TOUCHDOWN!

HEY, WHAT'D YOU DO THAT FOR?

THERE'S 2 MINUTES TO GO, AND
MY TEAM'S ON THE ONE-YARD LINE.

PETER BRADY, YOU'RE FIRED.

FIRED?

FIRED!

[crowd cheering]

FOR NO REASON AT ALL,

FROM RIGHT OUT OF
LEFT FIELD, SHE FIRED ME.

WHAT A ROTTEN THING TO
DO TO YOUR OWN BROTHER.

THAT'S WHAT YOU GET WHEN
YOU GIVE SMALL PEOPLE POWER.

THEY CAN'T HANDLE IT.

[banging on door]

(Marcia) ARE YOU GOING
TO BE IN THERE ALL NIGHT?

DICTATOR!

YOU BRAINWASHED BOBBY.

NO, I DIDN'T. I TOLD
HIM THE TRUTH.

YOU FIRED ME 'CAUSE
YOU'RE POWER-HUNGRY.

I FIRED YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE
LAZY AND YOU DESERVED IT.

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU
ARE? A COMPANY STOOGE!

WHAT'S THE USE?

OK, RUN AWAY FROM THE TRUTH,
YOU CAPTAIN BLIGH DICTATOR.

AND YOU'RE A
CAPITAL "G" GOOF-OFF!

ALL RIGHT, YOU
TWO KIDS, COOL IT.

MARCIA GAVE ME A RAW DEAL.

IN OTHER WORDS, YOU DID
EVERYTHING YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO DO?

I SURE DID.

WELL, I WOULD'VE AS SOON
AS I GOT AROUND TO IT.

SOONER OR LATER.

OK, SO I'M NOT PERFECT.

YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN.

PETER, IT SEEMS TO ME YOU
TOOK ADVANTAGE OF MARCIA

BECAUSE SHE'S YOUR
RELATIVE. TRUE OR FALSE?

WELL... TRUE OR FALSE?

[sighs]

TRUE.

WELL, ALL RIGHT THEN,
WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE

IF THE SITUATION WERE REVERSED?

I GUESS I'D HAVE
KICKED ME OUT, TOO.

I APOLOGIZE, CAPTAIN BLIGH.

OKAY, CAPITAL "G" GOOF-OFF.

HEY, I JUST THOUGHT
OF SOMETHING.

I PUT IN 3 DAYS OF WORK.

WONDER IF I COULD COLLECT
UNEMPLOYMENT INSURANCE?

I DON'T BELIEVE IT.

HELLO? (Jeff) LISTEN, MARSH.

HI, JEFF.

THERE'S A GREAT ROCK CONCERT
AT THE PARK ON SATURDAY.

I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU'D
LIKE TO CATCH IT WITH ME.

OH, I'M SORRY, BUT
I HAVE TO WORK.

OH, WELL, MAYBE WE CAN GET
TOGETHER SUNDAY AND DO SOMETHING.

I'M REALLY SORRY,
BUT I DON'T SEE HOW.

AFTER WORKING ALL WEEK, I'M
GOING TO HAVE TO DO MY HOMEWORK

AND SHAMPOO MY HAIR AND...

YEAH, YEAH, I GET THE MESSAGE.

BUSINESS BEFORE PLEASURE.

SEE YOU AROUND.

BYE.

[dial tone buzzing]

SORRY MY BROTHER DIDN'T
WORK OUT, MR. HASKELL.

LISTEN, MARCIA, NOT EVERYBODY IS
SUITED FOR THE ICE CREAM BUSINESS.

MR. HASKELL, WOULD YOU TAKE
A CHANCE ON ANOTHER BRADY?

ANOTHER BROTHER?

NO, A SISTER.

YOU MEAN THE LITTLE
ONE I MET IN HERE?

NO. THIS ONE'S OLDER.

WELL, THEY SAY THIS IS
A WOMAN'S WORLD NOW.

THANKS, MR. HASKELL.

AND DON'T WORRY. WE
WOMEN WON'T LET YOU DOWN.

SHE'S A VERY GOOD
WORKER, MARCIA.

I TOLD YOU, MR. HASKELL.

THEY SAY GOLF IS A
VERY RELAXING GAME.

I THINK I'LL GO OUT AND
RELAX 18 HOLES WORTH.

ENJOY YOURSELF. THANK YOU.

AND DON'T WORRY.

JUST LEAVE IT TO US BRADY GIRLS.

SEE YOU LATER, MR. HASKELL.

BYE. BYE-BYE.

WHAT SHOULD I DO NEXT?

UH, MEMORIZE ALL 29 FLAVORS.

I ALREADY DID THAT. WHAT ELSE?

HAVE SOME ICE CREAM.

I CAME HERE TO WORK, NOT EAT.

BOY, YOUR NAME SURE ISN'T PETER.

THANK YOU. COME AGAIN.

[mixer whirring]

MARCIA, YOU REALLY PICKED
US A WINNER THIS TIME.

YES, SIR. JAN'S FANTASTIC.

(Carol) AW, COME ON, ALICE.

WE DON'T CARE. LET US SEE.

HEY, CONGRATULATIONS,
YOU LOST 4 POUNDS!

WELL, THANKS TO
MR. BRADY AND WILLPOWER.

OK, YOUR TURN.

WELL, I'M SURE I'VE
LOST AT LEAST 5.

[gasps]

WHOOPS, YOU'VE GAINED 3 POUNDS.

THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.

NO SECRET EATING, HUH?

NOT A CALORIE. LISTEN,
YOUR SCALE IS OUT OF KILTER.

OW, YOU'RE STEPPING ON MY FOOT!

THAT'S 'CAUSE YOU'RE
STEPPING ON MY SCALE.

COME ON. OH, NO.

[chattering]

NO, PLEASE, DON'T.
OH, ALICE, ALICE!

MAY I HELP YOU?

YES, PLEASE.

HI, MARCIA.

HI, JEFF.

WE'D LIKE, UM, 2 LOVERS'
DELIGHT SPECIALS.

2 LOVERS' DELIGHTS.

OH, UM, COULD YOU
HURRY THAT UP, PLEASE?

WE'RE GOING TO A DRIVE-IN MOVIE.

2 LOVERS' DELIGHTS.

THE NERVE OF HIM.

I COULDN'T CARE LESS.

WHO NEEDS HIM?

HE CAN GO OUT WITH
ANYBODY HE WANTS.

THEN WHY ARE YOU SO UPSET?

WHO'S UPSET?

JUST BECAUSE HE HAPPENS
TO BE FICKLE DOESN'T UPSET ME.

YOU WOULD THINK HE'D
HAVE BETTER TASTE, THOUGH.

I THINK SHE'S KIND OF PRETTY.

ONLY IN SORT OF AN OBVIOUS WAY.

SHE'S PRACTICALLY
SITTING IN HIS LAP!

2 LOVERS' DELIGHTS.

HERE WE GO.

2 LOVERS' DELIGHTS.

WOULD YOU CARE
FOR WHIPPED CREAM?

YEAH, PLEASE.

OK.

LOOK WHAT YOU DID!

OH, I'M SORRY.

COME ON.

HERE. LET ME... LET ME...
LET ME WIPE SOME OFF.

MARCIA, HE LEFT WITHOUT PAYING.

THIS TREAT'S ON ME.

BOYS.

FROM NOW ON, I'M DEDICATING
MYSELF TO MY OWN CAREER.

WHAT CAREER?

THIS ONE. NOW I'M
AFTERNOON MANAGER.

SOON I'LL BE FULL MANAGER.

AND SOMEDAY MR. HASKELL
WILL MAKE ME HIS PARTNER.

HI, PARTNER. I
MEAN, MR. HASKELL.

HELLO, GIRLS.

SIT DOWN, JAN,
SIT DOWN A MINUTE.

WELL, I DID MY BEST,
BUT IT'S NO GOOD.

WHAT'S NO GOOD?

TEACHING AN OLD DOG NEW TRICKS.

PEOPLE SAID I NEEDED RELAXATION.

SO I RELAXED, I
WENT TO PLAY GOLF.

TRYING TO GET THAT LITTLE
BALL INTO THAT LITTLE HOLE

I ALMOST HAD A
NERVOUS BREAKDOWN.

THAT'S TOO BAD.

THE BEST RELAXATION FOR ME

IS GOING BACK TO
WORK AFTERNOONS.

THAT MEANS YOU
WON'T NEED ONE OF US.

THAT'S RIGHT, JAN.

TOUGH BREAK.

MARCIA... MARCIA, YOU'RE
A VERY GOOD WORKER.

THANK YOU, MR. HASKELL.

AND AN EMPLOYER HAS TO TAKE
CARE OF HIS BEST WORKERS, RIGHT?

RIGHT.

SO, LIKE I SAID, YOU'RE A
VERY GOOD WORKER, MARCIA,

BUT JAN HERE IS A
LITTLE BIT BETTER.

HUH?

I'M SORRY, MARCIA, BUT IF
I HAVE TO MAKE A CHOICE,

I HAVE TO CHOOSE JAN.

(Jan) MARCIA, I WANT TO...

DON'T EVEN TALK TO
ME, YOU JOB STEALER!

I KEEP TELLING YOU
IT'S NOT MY FAULT!

GIRLS, PLEASE,
NOBODY'S AT FAULT.

I'M SURE MR. HASKELL
JUST HIRED THE PERSON

HE THOUGHT WAS BEST FOR THE JOB.

THAT'S HOW IT IS IN BUSINESS.

BUT I GOT JAN THE JOB.

AND SHE SOLD OUT ONE
SISTER FOR 29 FLAVORS!

OH, MARCIA...

NO JOB IS WORTH
ALL THIS. I RESIGN.

NOW MAYBE MR. HASKELL
WILL GIVE YOU YOUR JOB BACK.

WOULD YOU?

YES, I WOULD.

ARE YOU SURE THAT'S WHAT
YOU WANT TO DO, SWEETHEART?

POSITIVE.

[phone ringing]

HELLO?

YES. JUST A MINUTE, PLEASE.

MARCIA, IT'S FOR YOU. IT'S JEFF.

JEFF, I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW

THAT I'M NOT INTERESTED IN
ANYTHING THAT YOU HAVE TO SAY

AND THAT I REALLY DON'T
THINK THAT WE SHOULD...

WHAT?

YOU JUST DATED HER TO GET EVEN?

WELL, I SQUIRTED YOU
WITH THE WHIPPED CREAM

FOR THE SAME REASON.

YEAH.

REALLY?

THAT SOUNDS GREAT.

OK.

BYE.

JEFF'S GOT SOMETHING
PLANNED FOR US TO DO

EVERY AFTERNOON NEXT WEEK.

BUT WHAT ABOUT YOUR
JOB? YOU'LL BE WORKING.

CORRECTION, JAN,
YOU'LL BE WORKING.

I'VE JUST RETIRED.

OH, NO!

(Peter) I GOT IT!

YOU GOT WHAT?

A JOB AT THE LEANING
TOWER OF PIZZA PARLOR.

HEY, GREAT, PETER.

IT'S EVEN BETTER THAN
WORKING FOR MR. HASKELL.

YOU MEAN THE SALARY?

NO, SEE, MR. HASKELL
ONLY HAS 29 FLAVORS.

THE LEANING TOWER
HAS 32 KINDS OF PIZZA.

I HOPE I CAN KEEP
MY JOB LONG ENOUGH

TO EAT MY WAY THROUGH
EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEM.

LET'S SEE.

OH! HEY!

OH, PIZZA.

UH-UH-UH.

DON'T YOU KNOW IT'S
DANGEROUS TO WAKE UP SOMEBODY

WHEN THEY'RE SLEEPWALKING?