The Bionic Woman (1976–1978): Season 3, Episode 5 - Rodeo - full transcript
Oscar asks Jaime to keep an eye on OSI computer expert Billy Cole who spends all his spare time competing in rodeo competitions. Cole has developed a Minerva code but has neglected to write...
Oh! Who is this cowboy anyway?
He's the resident O.S.I.
computer genius.
This is Lindsay Wagner.
Here are some scenes from the next episode
of The Bionic Woman.
All the keys to the Minerva Code
are in his head.
We'll get them out when we get him
to East Germany.
Gonna shoot pool or you gonna hide
behind her skirts?
When we get through with that dude,
the only thing
he's gonna be able to ride is a stretcher.
You ready, hazer?
Ready as I'll ever be.
Ha!
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
OSCAR: Come in.
(DOOR OPENS)
JAIME: Hi, Oscar. - What's up?
(DOOR CLOSES)
Oh, hi, Jaime.
Well, we have a problem.
But it's not a major one,
at least not yet.
And that's where you come in.
How so?
Let me show you.
I want you to take a look at this.
You sure you got the right tape?
You just watch, you'll see.
He's kinda cute.
I hadn't noticed.
JAIME: Mmm.
Oh!
Oh, no.
Who is this cowboy anyway?
His name is Dr. William Cole.
He's the resident O.S.I.
computer genius.
He likes rodeo. It's a big thing
to him.
And it's a very costly thing to us.
Two years ago, while he was working
on an ABM Project,
he took time off for the Pendleton Round-up.
A bronc tossed him on his head.
The concussion set our program back
seven weeks
and then there was a busted arm
at Calgary
which slowed the Alpha-Six Studies.
Really sounds like an interesting character.
Well, he's brilliant, eccentric,
but don't misunderstand,
he's an accomplished
rodeo rider.
After his last accident,
I demanded
that he choose between his job
and his hobby.
Well, he resigned,
so I compromised.
Now he does what he wants.
Some compromise.
Well, I can't win them all.
This weekend he wants to ride in the Templeton
Frontier Days Rodeo.
He also has a critical analysis
of Maximillian's bionic structure
next week that’s due.
You mean my favorite dog's here?
Yes, he's in Rudy's lab.
Didn't you know?
(HORSE NEIGHING)
Well, if he knows about Max and bionics,
does he know about me, too?
No, no, no. No, no.
He just knows about Maximillion.
Jaime, I want you to go up
with him this weekend,
keep an eye on him, get him back safely
on Monday,
and try to keep a cow from stepping on his head
in the meantime.
(EXCLAIMS)
Oscar, come on.
You don't...
You don't really want me
to get actually...
I mean, actually involved in
this rodeo, do you?
Only as a last resort, Jaime.
But I have confidence in you.
You've been an accomplished horsewoman
since you were eight years old.
Well, I know,
but in all that time
I didn't go running around
chasing an unhappy bull.
I mean...
Wow!
(SIGHS)
Is he going to know why I'm there?
No, no. He'll blow up
if he finds out
I sent some kind of a bodyguard.
It wouldn't fit in with
his bronco-busting image.
You understand?
Well, then, I guess I'm just going
to have to figure out
some way to get close to him.
There won't be any problem there, babe.
I've seen you in a cowgirl's outfit
before.
Hey, Max.
Dr. Cole, your boots.
Bill, how many times have I asked you
to wear rubber-soled
lab shoes in here?
Those boots pick up static electricity
from the floor
and it throws off some of our more sensitive
equipment.
I'm sorry, Rudy. I'm going right
back out anyway.
Just wanted to run a final check
on the factoring composites
of the Minerva Code.
Let me look.
All right.
(GRUNTING)
Oh. Beef-jerky.
Want a bite?
No. No, thanks.
Makes my eyes water.
Now...
Unless this clunker's busted,
the answer should be...
Sixty-one digit number equals
to two-to-the 200th power plus 235,
that's figuring in 32,000% variable
because of my boots.
Mmm-hmm.
Mmm.
Home free.
Now, under the trap door
methodology of encoding,
the Minerva Code is virtually unbreakable.
The difficulty factor
of cracking it
is finding two primes of a 110 to 125
digit number,
multiplied by two 63-digit variables.
All O.S.I.data transmitted to Miss Minerva
ought to be pretty safe.
I'll write it all up for you Monday
before I start with Max.
Oh, by the way, here's a little plan
I drew up
for an anti-static module so I can wear my boots
in here.
Oh, well, thanks.
Now, look, you're going, huh?
I mean, how can I convince you
to stay away from wild horses?
You can't. I'm closer than
I've ever been
to winning the All Around
Championship Cowboy Buckle.
Nothing will keep me away from that.
So long, Rudy.
Goodbye, Max. Don't do anything
I wouldn't do.
(MAX BARKS)
Bionically speaking.
See you, Bill.
Rudy.
(BARKS)
RUDY: You hear that?
You hear that, Max?
That's Jaime.
Come on. Let's show her
what we learned.
Go open the door for her.
Turn the knob with your mouth
like we practiced.
Now, go ahead.
Go ahead.
Turn it gently, Max.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Turn it. Don't pull it.
RUDY: Max! Max!
(LAUGHING)
Oh, Max.
(MAX WHIMPERING)
What is going on?
(LAUGHING)
Hi. Rudy's teaching him
a new trick
but I don't think he has it down yet.
I guessed that.
No, not quite.
Max, it's back to the drawing board.
That's okay, Max. Don't you worry
about it.
It's the thought that counts.
Oscar, we've got to do something
about Billy.
He just walked out of here on another
kamikaze mission.
That's Avery unique description
of rodeo riding.
Billy and I made our deal, Rudy.
I'm afraid we're all going to have
to live with it.
RUDY: Oscar,
I'll level with you.
I know he's brilliant,
but if he wants to be a cowboy,
we should just let him go
and do it.
He should stay out of the lab.
Rudy, you're over-reacting.
He's got the whole Minerva Code
in his head.
There's not one word
on paper yet.
If he gets racked up,
if his luck should run out,
we're back to square one.
When I agreed to let Billy ride,
I knew it was a gamble.
But now that Jaime is going to help,
I have hedged my bet.
Well, I hope you know
what you're getting into.
I'm just going to take it a step
at a time, that's all.
So, and as for you,
my little friend...
(MAX WHIMPERING)
You be a good boy, okay?
And I'll see you again real soon.
I hope.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
You were a good boy.
You know what, Max?
You were a good boy.
You just didn't make it.
(BAND PLAYING)
ANNOUNCER:
Will all the judges
for tomorrow's Livestock Competition
please report to the judges' tent.
Will all hazers for tomorrow's competition
please check in
with the stock contractor
in the main stable area.
JANOS: Is that him?
Mmm.
Oh. Howdy.
All of the keys to the Minerva Code
are in his head.
JANOS: No problem.
We'll get them out when we get him
to East Germany.
ANNOUNCER:... at the sign-in desk at
the rodeo producer's office
that's on the north side
of the arena.
TEAK: Hey, dude!
- Cole!
There he is, sure enough.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
CROWLEY: Oh, yes.
- The gold-plated cowboy
come all the way down
from Washington, D. C.
To show us poor folks
how it's done.
Ah, he's as frisky as a colt in a cow pasture,
ain't he?
Really thinks he's something.
I'd like to see him plow a furrow
with his head.
(LAUGHS)
Wait till he finds out ain't nobody gonna
haze for him.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
ANNOUNCER: Practice sessions
for tomorrow's main events
are now taking place
in the north arena.
BILLY: You see that silver buckle?
It's gonna be mine.
I plan to win it, so just what are you
trying to tell me?
Carlos, what do you mean
nobody'll haze for me?
That's the craziest thing
I ever heard.
Now, take it easy, Billy.
Juanita, take over, will you?
Come on.
ANNOUNCER: All competitors,
you are reminded again
of the noon sign-in deadline for
tomorrow's competition.
Better report right away
to the sign-in desk.
That's on the north side
of the arena.
All right,
what's this all about?
A couple of the boys are leaning in on folks
mighty heavy, Billy.
Letting them know that there'll be trouble
for anyone that rides with you.
Which couple of boys?
Look, Billy,
I don't want no trouble.
You can understand that.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
BILLY: It's Crowley and Teak, isn't it?
Face it, Billy.
Come Monday you'll be going
to Washington,
but they'll still be here leaning
on people.
They're rough boys.
Ain't no one going to
side by you.
Ain't no one going to haze for you.
I'm sorry, Billy.
All right.
That's just fine.
I'll do it without a hazer.
Thanks a lot, Carlos.
Sir. Excuse me.
Hi.
Si, senorita.
What does a hazer do?
He rides beside you in the bulldogging,
he rides pickup for the broncs,
all like that.
Now, what's going to happen if he tries to compete
without one?
Senorita, he can't compete
without a hazer.
Thank you.
ANNOUNCER: Mark Simmons is set now
for a practice run.
Hi.
Hi.
I hear you're fresh out
of hazers?
So?
Well, I'm out of a job and all the other hazers
seem to have work.
You need a side-rider
and I need a job.
And I think that's a pretty good
combination.
You're a girl or is it a cowperson?
I'm a woman and I need a job.
Now, how about it?
Nah. I'm sorry.
There're a couple of
boys around here
who might not care whether or not
you're a woman.
I wouldn't like to see you get hurt.
I heard about those guys.
Who are they?
They're nobody. Just a couple
of saddle-tramps.
They ride all the rodeos
in this circuit.
Well, maybe the both of us ought
to sit this one out.
No way.
Lady, this is my year.
I've got 97 points in the All Around
Cowboy standings.
I only need three more to win that little
silver buckle.
Now, I know that sounds dumb
to a lot of people,
but it means a lot to me.
There's other rodeos.
This is the last one in the time limit
this year.
(SIGHS)
Well, looks like you're back to me.
(CHUCKLES)
Now, tell me straight.
Have you ever done any hazing before?
No, but I've been on the girls' rodeo circuit
for two years
and I'm a very fast learner.
How good are you at pickup riding?
I picked up on you, didn't I?
I'll answer that in a minute.
You just go over there and ask Carlos for
old Windfire.
All my hazers use him.
(WINDFIRE NEIGHING)
Hey, sweetheart, you can drop your loop
on me anytime.
Okay, boy, we're both going
to work.
Hey, wait a minute.
That's Cole's hazing horse,
ain't it?
You don't suppose she's got some
crazy idea, do you?
You know, we best teach
that little lady
to mind her own business.
You just sit tight.
(WINDFIRE NEIGHING)
JAIME: Windfire, you're a frisky one,
aren't you?
Come on.
(CLICKING TONGUE)
Come on.
Oh. Oh.
The games boys will play.
Excuse me.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Come on. Thank you for kicking down that door
for me, Windfire.
Here we go.
I can't imagine how it got locked.
(CLICKING TONGUE)
Come on. Come on.
I think I'll find out more
about those two.
You sure you remember
everything I told you?
Uh, yeah.
Uh-huh.
Now, keep bearing in and keep the steer
going straight.
How am I going to know when
you're ready to jump?
You just let me take care of that.
You all set?
Yeah.
ANNOUNCER: Now in the chute,
it's Billy Cole.
Now then, this should be
worth a few laughs.
Yeah.
(LAUGHS)
Now, when the steer takes off, you take off.
But whatever you do, don't let your horse
go wide.
Okay, I keep the steer
going straight,
I bear in with the horse and don't let him
go wide, right?
Okay. You got all that, Windfire?
(WINDFIRE NEIGHS)
He sound like he's mad about
something to you?
Windfire?
He's gentle as a little lamb.
(NEIGHING)
Yeah. Does he know that?
I've got a feeling you have a plan,
my dear.
BILLY: Outside.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Windfire!
Hold him in.
(GRUNTS)
ANNOUNCER:
Aw, too bad.
Steer went a little wide on him.
Aw, ain't that a shame.
(LAUGHING)
That little lady let
old Windfire go wide.
Looks like old Billy-boy may never even get
to the competition.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Are you okay?
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
(SIGHS)
What's the last thing
I told you to do?
Keep the steer going straight?
Uh-uh. Uh-uh.
It was,
"Don't go wide."
Well, it was Windfire here
that went wide.
And I'm telling you he did it on purpose.
You gotta let him know
who's boss.
Didn't you squeeze in on him a little
with your knees?
I did.
Yeah? You ain't got much meat
on your bones.
Maybe you just don't have the strength
in your legs.
Let me try it again, okay?
All right now, Windfire,
you go wide again
and you're going to be in
for a big surprise.
(NEIGHS)
All right, if that's the way you want it.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(WINDFIRE NEIGHING)
And don't you forget it.
(NEIGHS)
(ANNOUNCER CHATTERING)
And Billy's got him!
(SPECTATORS APPLAUDING)
All right, that's more like it.
Well, you've got to give credit
where it's due.
That's good work, Windfire.
And thank you for the lesson, sir.
Now, wait a minute.
One good ride doesn't make you
cowgirl of the year.
We've got a whole lot
more practicing to do.
So, mount up.
Mount up.
(GRUNTING)
Okay.
Well, what do you think?
I don't know.
ANNOUNCER: Billy Cole's
riding Sidewinder.
Sidewinder is one of
the tougher broncs,
(CONTINUES CHATTERING)
Okey-doke.
How'd I do?
If I told you,
you'd get a swelled head.
Blythe way, what's your name?
It's Jaime Sommers.
I have a job?
Well, that's possible.
Depends how much confidence I get in you.
Well, how am I going
to arrange that?
Well, I guess a good idea would be
to get to know each other real good.
And just how good is real good?
Ah, well, time will tell,
won't it?
How about us having dinner tonight?
Okay.
Then it's a date, hazer.
You got it, cowboy.
I might even wear a yellow ribbon
for you, you know that?
(CLICKING TONGUE)
Come on.
That girl is getting pretty good.
With her, old Billy-boy's liable
to do okay.
When we get through with that dude,
the only thing
he's gonna be able to ride is a stretcher.
Come on.
Let's go.
We'd better grab Cole before those two idiots
kill him.
No, no, no, no, wait a minute.
There's an opportunity here.
If we can get Dr. Cole
into East Germany
without arousing O.S.I. suspicion
we'll be that much ahead
of the game, hmm?
Sure, but how?
Now, suppose we use these two men,
Teak and Crowley.
Their animosity toward Cole is
public knowledge.
We'll hire them to kidnap Cole.
We get Cole and let everyone think
that Teak and Crowley
were the ones involved.
And no one will suspect
we have the Minerva Code.
Mmm-hmm.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
Come on, let's find a table.
Okay, but not too near
the orchestra here.
I've got very sensitive ears.
Well, lookee who we got here.
Big city hot-shot come down to
show off again.
Wanna shoot some pool, sucker?
Aw, he's afraid his girl is going to see him
get whomped.
You know, I think Teak's right,
'cause there's two things
I can whip your tail at,
it's rodeo and shooting pool.
Ain't that it?
What do you say, chicken lips?
Gonna shoot pool or you gonna hide
behind her skirts?
Heck, I'll even... I'll even give you
first crack.
I'll shoot you a little pool.
Billy, can I break it for you?
Sure.
Yup.
CROWLEY: Lookee here, Teak. She must think
she's Minnesota Fats.
(CROWLEY LAUGHING)
TEAK: Now, make sure you don't
miss the cue ball, honey.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Oh, those must have been some old balls.
(NERVOUS CHUCKLE)
I guess we can't play anymore.
Sorry about that.
Come on.
I'm starving, Billy.
Hey...
How'd you do that?
I haven't the faintest idea
how I did that.
What's good here?
The steaks aren't too bad.
When they finish with the livestock
over at the rodeo,
they send them over here.
I would like to have the Ranch House Special,
medium,
with a baked potato, lots of butter
and no sour cream.
Sounds good.
I'll make it two.
Couple of drafts?
That Crowley and his friend
certainly are down on you.
Well, I can't really blame them.
They're hard riding guys, work all the rodeos
in this area.
I guess I'd get ticked off too
if some computerjockey
breezed in here
and won some points away
from them
and then took off again
to the big city.
Computer jockey?
Mathematician.
Weekdays.
Bartender! Rye.
Just leave the bottle.
You shouldn't have to apologize
for being good.
I mean, even if it is just
a hobby for you.
It seems like I don't fit in
anywhere.
When I'm out on the rodeo circuit
I'm the brainy scientist
and when I'm in the office
I'm the hayseed cowboy.
Seems like I'm always
on the outside looking in.
Well, I guess it's about time
to have a serious discussion
with Dr. Cole.
Let's go.
Hey, buffalo chip.
It's time to break your arm again
like we did in Calgary.
Then we're gonna throw you right back
into the compost heap
where you come from.
Well, that's just wonderful, boys,
but I haven't finished my dinner yet.
Oh, yes, you have.
Ow!
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(GROANING)
Ow! What happened?
JAIME: Oh, they just had
a little too much to drink.
They're falling all over themselves.
Can't we go someplace where it's a little
more quiet?
Where it's a little more quiet?
Not on your life. This calls
for celebrating.
Come here.
Come here.
Hey, Ruby...
Oh, I don't know...
I don't know what happened.
I think Cole must have
shoved me, huh?
But how could he have
done that to you
and decked me at the same time?
I don't know.
I'm telling you,
I've had it with him.
The next time I see him,
he's gonna be buzzard bait.
Excuse me, but I couldn't
help overhearing.
There's a much better way
if you’ll listen to me.
Who are you, mister?
Not a friend of yours.
But at least, we both want
the same thing.
Oh, now, just what's that
supposed to mean?
I want Dr. Cole delivered to me.
Now, if you’re interested,
I'll tell you exactly how to handle it.
And it's worth $5,000
for each of you.
Well, now...
Mister, you... you just might have
yourself a deal.
Oh, give me a home
Where computers don't roam
And the spies and the ciphers don't...
(SHUSHING)
Come on, you're gonna wake up the whole place.
Okay?
Hey, look, I...
Where'd I park my pickup?
It's right here.
All right.
Here, hold on to it, please.
Okay.
Hey, well, listen.
I'm really sorry I got you into
that mess.
The fact is I don't really
like to fight.
I don't like to fight either.
But we didn't have much choice, did we?
Okay, I am going to make you the cutest
little bed you ever saw.
All right.
Whoa. Hold on.
Don't do that on me.
You promised me.
What? I didn't do it.
Hold on. Hold on.
The truck moved a little.
Okay.
Now, please, sir.
Hmm?
It's ready.
In you go.
(GRUNTS)
Come on.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Hey, what's happening?
You're strong.
Your hat.
Head.
There you are.
(SIGHS)
Sweet dreams.
Hey, have I been making
a fool of myself?
No. Just the beer talking loud.
Oh.
You know,
you're some kinda girl.
I never had a girl too long.
I didn't have the time.
Winning that silver buckle
and the right girl.
That'd be getting it all.
Billy, I think there are some things
you should know about me before you start talking
like that.
Like what?
Well, first of all,
I want you to know
that I really do like you too,
and I know that you're gonna know that
somewhere down the line.
It's... it's just that
I'm not exactly what I have been
pretending to be.
Good night, cowboy.
ANNOUNCER: Howdy,
cowboys and cowgirls.
A big, big Templeton hello to our Frontier Days
and Rodeo.
We got a whole day of events planned for you.
Livestock judging competition
will start at 10:00 this morning
on the north side.
And the rodeo competition featuring some of
our best local cowboys
is gonna begin later this afternoon
right in the main arena.
BILLY: Lady, I'm gonna win that little silver
belt buckle today.
These old bones can feel it.
(LAUGHS)
I think this buckle means more to you
than a Nobel Prize in mathematics would.
Well, it's a whole lot
more fun winning it.
Especially with you as my hazer.
Hey, Jaime,
I appreciate what you're doing
for me today.
Appreciate you, too.
You sure you want to
warm up again?
I'm a little saddle sore
from yesterday, you know.
Just once or twice.
And then we got the whole afternoon off
before the event begins.
Okay?
Okay.
You got that drug they gave us?
Huh?
Okay.
Just in case he don't drop like a rock like
that guy said he would,
I got mine ready too.
ANNOUNCER: Hey, Billy Cole now has his
new pretty cowgirl hazer.
Gonna make a practice run
before the competition gets started later
this afternoon.
You ready, hazer?
(SIGHS)
Ready as I'll ever be.
Ready. Let her out.
(BELLOWING)
Ha!
(SNAPS)
Billy!
ANNOUNCER: Oh, bad spell for
Billy Cole.
Looks like Billy's saddle gave way.
Let's all hope that he's going
to be all right.
Looks like...
He's going to be okay.
What are you doing?
Billy?
Just trying to help.
I'll bet you're trying to help.
Lady, he's plum knocked out.
We're just trying to help.
Yeah, we better get him
into the truck.
Wait a minute.
What are you doing?
Well, we got to get him
to first aid.
What truck? It's my truck.
It's right over there.
Just happened to be out there,
did it?
Lady, we're just trying to help.
Listen, I think we'd both be
a lot better off
if you guys would stop trying
to help us.
Now, I think...
Now, honey...
(EXHALES)
Well, what do you know, the little lady done gone
and fainted too.
Yeah. We'd better get them
both over to first aid.
Yeah.
Come on.
CROWLEY:
Just think, Teak,
a few hours and Cole's going to be
out of our lives forever.
How they doing?
Ah, they're still out just like two fat heifers
in the noonday sun.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Boy, that's some kind of stuff.
Okay, now, Janos said he'd meet us
at the old Crowfoot Ranch.
Yeah, when will we get our money?
Radnik will bring that out there
when he flies in to pick up these two
and then it's south of the border
for me and you.
TEAK: Yee-haw!
(CROWLEY LAUGHING)
(GUN FIRING)
(GUN COCKING)
(GUN FIRING)
(CLATTERING)
TEAK: Yee-hoo!
- Bullseye!
Try another one.
Go ahead.
(FIRES)
Yee-hoo! Now, that's some
real turkey shooting.
I wish that turkey in the barn would
make a run for it.
(LAUGHING)
Hey...
I'm real sorry I got you into
this mess, Jaime.
Afraid you've got it backwards,
I'm the one that let you get
into this mess.
Oscar Goldman sent me here
to protect you.
Oh.
So, you ain’t just some little lost bear cub
in the woods, huh?
Well, go on, let's have
the rest of it.
There's not much more to it.
I was supposed to keep you from
getting hurt
and get you back to Washington by Monday.
How were you supposed to do
that little trick?
You're some kind of a ringer,
gonna out-rodeo me?
Oh, I wasn't gonna out-rodeo you.
Look, you work with Max.
I know you know about bionics and...
I'm bionic.
(SCOFFS)
Well, if that don't beat all.
I always said you were something.
I'm beginning to feel better already,
seeing as how I've been took in
by a freak.
I don't deserve that.
I didn't deserve to be lied to either.
You should have known when I first...
when you saw that I was beginning
to like you.
That might have been a good time to tell me
who you were then.
I tried to tell you.
You passed out on me, remember?
Well, maybe I am the pot
calling the kettle black.
I'm the one who's the freak.
I have been all my life.
You know, when I was eight years old
back in Midland,
growing up on a ranch,
I was doing calculus.
I was always the brainy one
back at home in Midland.
But I was the hayseed
at M.I.T.
Billy, you have succeeded
at everything you've tried.
I think you'd be proud of that.
I never really succeeded
at anything.
It's just some trick in my head
that makes me good at math
and that's all it is.
It's just a trick.
You know, my daddy was All Around Champion
Cowboy over 20 years ago.
I was so proud of him.
It's kind a too bad that he never figured out
what made me tick.
If rodeoing is just your way
of proving to somebody what you are,
you should quit it.
I mean, you don't have to prove yourself
to anybody.
Well, couldn't anyway.
He's dead.
Oh.
Look, what nobody seems
to understand is I like it.
I really do.
I mean, when I'm out there riding,
I feel full.
I feel good inside.
It don't come easy and I know
I'm paying for it
with broken bones and all of that,
but if I could've just won that
silver belt buckle...
Hey...
Ah! It's not easy to put into words.
You don't have to put it in words
for me.
If that's the way you feel,
you go for it.
And you just do it.
I said it when I met you,
you're some kind of gal.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
RADNIK: (OVER RADIO)
- Calling ground base.
Zebra Alpha Charlie calling ground base.
JANOS: This is
- Zebra Alpha Charlie.
We're in position. Cargo is ready
for loading.
Very good.
My ETA is approximately
five minutes.
Zebra Alpha Charlie out.
Ground base out.
Oh, well, this "some kinda gal"
better get her act together
and figure something out here.
What do you mean?
If we don't get out of here now,
we're never going to get out of here.
(GRUNTING)
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Now, that is a problem
in stress factors
I wouldn't even want to try to calculate.
Unfortunately, I've only got
one bionic arm here,
and if I pull on these ropes, I'm going to break
my other one
and possibly yours too.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(GRUNTS)
There we go.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Okay, come on.
(GRUNTS)
Thanks.
Sure.
Teak's out there, but I don't see Crowley
or that other guy.
All right, why don't you push the door open
just when I tell you, okay.
Yeah.
Okay. Go.
Well, there's Crowley
out by the loading chute.
Tell me something, do you feel up to
a little bulldogging?
What have you got in mind?
Well I thought maybe you could go out
behind the barn
and around behind him.
I'll go out front and do some hazing
for you.
You know he's got a rifle out there.
Well, I've got a few
surprises left myself.
I mean, we can't just sit around
here waiting
for the posse to show up.
(SIGHS)
All right.
Jaime, just this once,
go wide. Okay?
Hey, turkey.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(GUN FIRING)
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Nice work, Dr. Cole.
(LAUGHING)
I'd be inclined to say
that you and I could be
a silver buckle team.
Well, thank you, ma'am.
But...
(AIRPLANE SOARING)
I think we've got some loose ends
to tie up. Come on.
Get Cole and the girl.
Right.
Hi, guys.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(ENGINE ROARING)
Billy, I can't hold it
any longer.
Shut off the engine.
BILLY: End of the line, fella.
Come on.
JAIME: Go faster, Billy.
BILLY: Hey, Jaime. - We're never going
to get back in time.
ANNOUNCER: That's cowboy - Gil Carson up there
on Range war.
And uh-oh, that's it for Gil.
Next time, cowboy.
(BUZZER BUZZING)
Yes, that's Hank Ferris
on old Thunder and Lightning.
Wow, look at that bronco buck.
He's giving that cowboy a ride.
Oh, my goodness, Hank fell down.
Too bad, cowboy.
Hey, Hank, remember next week.
OSCAR: But I don't understand,
doesn't anybody know
where they were taken?
He's scheduled to ride next.
Wait, that looks like them now.
Jaime! I got here as soon as I found you
and Billy were hurt.
I know, but I haven't time
to talk about it.
Come on.
Okay, okay.
Would you take care of that junk
in the truck?
Oh, Billy, I think we're going
to make it.
ANNOUNCER: That'll teach old Red Eye who's boss
around here.
(BUZZER BUZZING)
A great ride.
There ain't too many cowboys
who can stay on old Red Eye, that long.
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
It's Frank Louis up on Dynamite.
Cowboy's good to go.
He's got a good ride
from Dynamite too.
Hmm. That bronc is tough today, folks.
Frank's hanging in there. Good.
A tough cowboy.
Dynamite is...
Oh! Oh, down goes Frank.
Let's have a good hand
for a good man, a good cowboy.
Next time, Frank.
Jaime, just one thing.
No bionics, okay?
I want to win this on my own or not at all.
I wouldn't have it any other way,
my friend.
Come on.
ANNOUNCER: He looks okay now,
doesn't he?
He'll be wearing number 152 and
he'll be up on Diablo.
A real hard-riding bronc.
Old Billy though, is the leader
on the East Texas Rodeo Circuit
with 97 points.
And you know a win right here
will put Billy Cole over the top
and earn him All Around Cowboy
award honors
as well as the symbolic
Silver Buckle.
So, come on, cowboy!
Oh, here he comes.
Whoo!
Look at old Diablo buck.
He's gonna have a tough time
getting rid of Billy, though.
(CONTINUES CHATTERING)
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
(BUZZER BUZZING)
He's made it. A good ride,
cowboy.
A good ride.
Fantastic ride, Billy.
Yeah.
Hope it's enough.
ANNOUNCER: And here it is.
- We have the winner.
Billy Cole.
That makes Billy the All Around
Cowboy award winner
of the East Texas Rodeo Circuit.
Attaboy, Billy.
Congratulations.
Well, a deal's a deal.
See you back in Washington.
You don't have to go back there, Billy.
You don't fit in.
I've decided that I'm going to
have you transferred
from Washington to the O.S.I. facility
in Colorado Springs.
You'll be near the outdoors
and you can do the things you like to.
Max'll be waiting for you
when you get there.
I'll...
I'll see you later.
Okay.
That's fantastic.
(CHUCKLES)
That's so pretty.
Yeah.
I want you to have it.
Oh, come on, Billy.
I can't take that.
I know how much that means to you.
Well, winning it did mean a lot.
But having it just...
Besides, if you got it,
I figure I'm entitled
to visiting privileges
every now and then.
How do you figure it?
Hmm?
Yeah.
He's the resident O.S.I.
computer genius.
This is Lindsay Wagner.
Here are some scenes from the next episode
of The Bionic Woman.
All the keys to the Minerva Code
are in his head.
We'll get them out when we get him
to East Germany.
Gonna shoot pool or you gonna hide
behind her skirts?
When we get through with that dude,
the only thing
he's gonna be able to ride is a stretcher.
You ready, hazer?
Ready as I'll ever be.
Ha!
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
OSCAR: Come in.
(DOOR OPENS)
JAIME: Hi, Oscar. - What's up?
(DOOR CLOSES)
Oh, hi, Jaime.
Well, we have a problem.
But it's not a major one,
at least not yet.
And that's where you come in.
How so?
Let me show you.
I want you to take a look at this.
You sure you got the right tape?
You just watch, you'll see.
He's kinda cute.
I hadn't noticed.
JAIME: Mmm.
Oh!
Oh, no.
Who is this cowboy anyway?
His name is Dr. William Cole.
He's the resident O.S.I.
computer genius.
He likes rodeo. It's a big thing
to him.
And it's a very costly thing to us.
Two years ago, while he was working
on an ABM Project,
he took time off for the Pendleton Round-up.
A bronc tossed him on his head.
The concussion set our program back
seven weeks
and then there was a busted arm
at Calgary
which slowed the Alpha-Six Studies.
Really sounds like an interesting character.
Well, he's brilliant, eccentric,
but don't misunderstand,
he's an accomplished
rodeo rider.
After his last accident,
I demanded
that he choose between his job
and his hobby.
Well, he resigned,
so I compromised.
Now he does what he wants.
Some compromise.
Well, I can't win them all.
This weekend he wants to ride in the Templeton
Frontier Days Rodeo.
He also has a critical analysis
of Maximillian's bionic structure
next week that’s due.
You mean my favorite dog's here?
Yes, he's in Rudy's lab.
Didn't you know?
(HORSE NEIGHING)
Well, if he knows about Max and bionics,
does he know about me, too?
No, no, no. No, no.
He just knows about Maximillion.
Jaime, I want you to go up
with him this weekend,
keep an eye on him, get him back safely
on Monday,
and try to keep a cow from stepping on his head
in the meantime.
(EXCLAIMS)
Oscar, come on.
You don't...
You don't really want me
to get actually...
I mean, actually involved in
this rodeo, do you?
Only as a last resort, Jaime.
But I have confidence in you.
You've been an accomplished horsewoman
since you were eight years old.
Well, I know,
but in all that time
I didn't go running around
chasing an unhappy bull.
I mean...
Wow!
(SIGHS)
Is he going to know why I'm there?
No, no. He'll blow up
if he finds out
I sent some kind of a bodyguard.
It wouldn't fit in with
his bronco-busting image.
You understand?
Well, then, I guess I'm just going
to have to figure out
some way to get close to him.
There won't be any problem there, babe.
I've seen you in a cowgirl's outfit
before.
Hey, Max.
Dr. Cole, your boots.
Bill, how many times have I asked you
to wear rubber-soled
lab shoes in here?
Those boots pick up static electricity
from the floor
and it throws off some of our more sensitive
equipment.
I'm sorry, Rudy. I'm going right
back out anyway.
Just wanted to run a final check
on the factoring composites
of the Minerva Code.
Let me look.
All right.
(GRUNTING)
Oh. Beef-jerky.
Want a bite?
No. No, thanks.
Makes my eyes water.
Now...
Unless this clunker's busted,
the answer should be...
Sixty-one digit number equals
to two-to-the 200th power plus 235,
that's figuring in 32,000% variable
because of my boots.
Mmm-hmm.
Mmm.
Home free.
Now, under the trap door
methodology of encoding,
the Minerva Code is virtually unbreakable.
The difficulty factor
of cracking it
is finding two primes of a 110 to 125
digit number,
multiplied by two 63-digit variables.
All O.S.I.data transmitted to Miss Minerva
ought to be pretty safe.
I'll write it all up for you Monday
before I start with Max.
Oh, by the way, here's a little plan
I drew up
for an anti-static module so I can wear my boots
in here.
Oh, well, thanks.
Now, look, you're going, huh?
I mean, how can I convince you
to stay away from wild horses?
You can't. I'm closer than
I've ever been
to winning the All Around
Championship Cowboy Buckle.
Nothing will keep me away from that.
So long, Rudy.
Goodbye, Max. Don't do anything
I wouldn't do.
(MAX BARKS)
Bionically speaking.
See you, Bill.
Rudy.
(BARKS)
RUDY: You hear that?
You hear that, Max?
That's Jaime.
Come on. Let's show her
what we learned.
Go open the door for her.
Turn the knob with your mouth
like we practiced.
Now, go ahead.
Go ahead.
Turn it gently, Max.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Turn it. Don't pull it.
RUDY: Max! Max!
(LAUGHING)
Oh, Max.
(MAX WHIMPERING)
What is going on?
(LAUGHING)
Hi. Rudy's teaching him
a new trick
but I don't think he has it down yet.
I guessed that.
No, not quite.
Max, it's back to the drawing board.
That's okay, Max. Don't you worry
about it.
It's the thought that counts.
Oscar, we've got to do something
about Billy.
He just walked out of here on another
kamikaze mission.
That's Avery unique description
of rodeo riding.
Billy and I made our deal, Rudy.
I'm afraid we're all going to have
to live with it.
RUDY: Oscar,
I'll level with you.
I know he's brilliant,
but if he wants to be a cowboy,
we should just let him go
and do it.
He should stay out of the lab.
Rudy, you're over-reacting.
He's got the whole Minerva Code
in his head.
There's not one word
on paper yet.
If he gets racked up,
if his luck should run out,
we're back to square one.
When I agreed to let Billy ride,
I knew it was a gamble.
But now that Jaime is going to help,
I have hedged my bet.
Well, I hope you know
what you're getting into.
I'm just going to take it a step
at a time, that's all.
So, and as for you,
my little friend...
(MAX WHIMPERING)
You be a good boy, okay?
And I'll see you again real soon.
I hope.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
You were a good boy.
You know what, Max?
You were a good boy.
You just didn't make it.
(BAND PLAYING)
ANNOUNCER:
Will all the judges
for tomorrow's Livestock Competition
please report to the judges' tent.
Will all hazers for tomorrow's competition
please check in
with the stock contractor
in the main stable area.
JANOS: Is that him?
Mmm.
Oh. Howdy.
All of the keys to the Minerva Code
are in his head.
JANOS: No problem.
We'll get them out when we get him
to East Germany.
ANNOUNCER:... at the sign-in desk at
the rodeo producer's office
that's on the north side
of the arena.
TEAK: Hey, dude!
- Cole!
There he is, sure enough.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
CROWLEY: Oh, yes.
- The gold-plated cowboy
come all the way down
from Washington, D. C.
To show us poor folks
how it's done.
Ah, he's as frisky as a colt in a cow pasture,
ain't he?
Really thinks he's something.
I'd like to see him plow a furrow
with his head.
(LAUGHS)
Wait till he finds out ain't nobody gonna
haze for him.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
ANNOUNCER: Practice sessions
for tomorrow's main events
are now taking place
in the north arena.
BILLY: You see that silver buckle?
It's gonna be mine.
I plan to win it, so just what are you
trying to tell me?
Carlos, what do you mean
nobody'll haze for me?
That's the craziest thing
I ever heard.
Now, take it easy, Billy.
Juanita, take over, will you?
Come on.
ANNOUNCER: All competitors,
you are reminded again
of the noon sign-in deadline for
tomorrow's competition.
Better report right away
to the sign-in desk.
That's on the north side
of the arena.
All right,
what's this all about?
A couple of the boys are leaning in on folks
mighty heavy, Billy.
Letting them know that there'll be trouble
for anyone that rides with you.
Which couple of boys?
Look, Billy,
I don't want no trouble.
You can understand that.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
BILLY: It's Crowley and Teak, isn't it?
Face it, Billy.
Come Monday you'll be going
to Washington,
but they'll still be here leaning
on people.
They're rough boys.
Ain't no one going to
side by you.
Ain't no one going to haze for you.
I'm sorry, Billy.
All right.
That's just fine.
I'll do it without a hazer.
Thanks a lot, Carlos.
Sir. Excuse me.
Hi.
Si, senorita.
What does a hazer do?
He rides beside you in the bulldogging,
he rides pickup for the broncs,
all like that.
Now, what's going to happen if he tries to compete
without one?
Senorita, he can't compete
without a hazer.
Thank you.
ANNOUNCER: Mark Simmons is set now
for a practice run.
Hi.
Hi.
I hear you're fresh out
of hazers?
So?
Well, I'm out of a job and all the other hazers
seem to have work.
You need a side-rider
and I need a job.
And I think that's a pretty good
combination.
You're a girl or is it a cowperson?
I'm a woman and I need a job.
Now, how about it?
Nah. I'm sorry.
There're a couple of
boys around here
who might not care whether or not
you're a woman.
I wouldn't like to see you get hurt.
I heard about those guys.
Who are they?
They're nobody. Just a couple
of saddle-tramps.
They ride all the rodeos
in this circuit.
Well, maybe the both of us ought
to sit this one out.
No way.
Lady, this is my year.
I've got 97 points in the All Around
Cowboy standings.
I only need three more to win that little
silver buckle.
Now, I know that sounds dumb
to a lot of people,
but it means a lot to me.
There's other rodeos.
This is the last one in the time limit
this year.
(SIGHS)
Well, looks like you're back to me.
(CHUCKLES)
Now, tell me straight.
Have you ever done any hazing before?
No, but I've been on the girls' rodeo circuit
for two years
and I'm a very fast learner.
How good are you at pickup riding?
I picked up on you, didn't I?
I'll answer that in a minute.
You just go over there and ask Carlos for
old Windfire.
All my hazers use him.
(WINDFIRE NEIGHING)
Hey, sweetheart, you can drop your loop
on me anytime.
Okay, boy, we're both going
to work.
Hey, wait a minute.
That's Cole's hazing horse,
ain't it?
You don't suppose she's got some
crazy idea, do you?
You know, we best teach
that little lady
to mind her own business.
You just sit tight.
(WINDFIRE NEIGHING)
JAIME: Windfire, you're a frisky one,
aren't you?
Come on.
(CLICKING TONGUE)
Come on.
Oh. Oh.
The games boys will play.
Excuse me.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Come on. Thank you for kicking down that door
for me, Windfire.
Here we go.
I can't imagine how it got locked.
(CLICKING TONGUE)
Come on. Come on.
I think I'll find out more
about those two.
You sure you remember
everything I told you?
Uh, yeah.
Uh-huh.
Now, keep bearing in and keep the steer
going straight.
How am I going to know when
you're ready to jump?
You just let me take care of that.
You all set?
Yeah.
ANNOUNCER: Now in the chute,
it's Billy Cole.
Now then, this should be
worth a few laughs.
Yeah.
(LAUGHS)
Now, when the steer takes off, you take off.
But whatever you do, don't let your horse
go wide.
Okay, I keep the steer
going straight,
I bear in with the horse and don't let him
go wide, right?
Okay. You got all that, Windfire?
(WINDFIRE NEIGHS)
He sound like he's mad about
something to you?
Windfire?
He's gentle as a little lamb.
(NEIGHING)
Yeah. Does he know that?
I've got a feeling you have a plan,
my dear.
BILLY: Outside.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Windfire!
Hold him in.
(GRUNTS)
ANNOUNCER:
Aw, too bad.
Steer went a little wide on him.
Aw, ain't that a shame.
(LAUGHING)
That little lady let
old Windfire go wide.
Looks like old Billy-boy may never even get
to the competition.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Are you okay?
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
(SIGHS)
What's the last thing
I told you to do?
Keep the steer going straight?
Uh-uh. Uh-uh.
It was,
"Don't go wide."
Well, it was Windfire here
that went wide.
And I'm telling you he did it on purpose.
You gotta let him know
who's boss.
Didn't you squeeze in on him a little
with your knees?
I did.
Yeah? You ain't got much meat
on your bones.
Maybe you just don't have the strength
in your legs.
Let me try it again, okay?
All right now, Windfire,
you go wide again
and you're going to be in
for a big surprise.
(NEIGHS)
All right, if that's the way you want it.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(WINDFIRE NEIGHING)
And don't you forget it.
(NEIGHS)
(ANNOUNCER CHATTERING)
And Billy's got him!
(SPECTATORS APPLAUDING)
All right, that's more like it.
Well, you've got to give credit
where it's due.
That's good work, Windfire.
And thank you for the lesson, sir.
Now, wait a minute.
One good ride doesn't make you
cowgirl of the year.
We've got a whole lot
more practicing to do.
So, mount up.
Mount up.
(GRUNTING)
Okay.
Well, what do you think?
I don't know.
ANNOUNCER: Billy Cole's
riding Sidewinder.
Sidewinder is one of
the tougher broncs,
(CONTINUES CHATTERING)
Okey-doke.
How'd I do?
If I told you,
you'd get a swelled head.
Blythe way, what's your name?
It's Jaime Sommers.
I have a job?
Well, that's possible.
Depends how much confidence I get in you.
Well, how am I going
to arrange that?
Well, I guess a good idea would be
to get to know each other real good.
And just how good is real good?
Ah, well, time will tell,
won't it?
How about us having dinner tonight?
Okay.
Then it's a date, hazer.
You got it, cowboy.
I might even wear a yellow ribbon
for you, you know that?
(CLICKING TONGUE)
Come on.
That girl is getting pretty good.
With her, old Billy-boy's liable
to do okay.
When we get through with that dude,
the only thing
he's gonna be able to ride is a stretcher.
Come on.
Let's go.
We'd better grab Cole before those two idiots
kill him.
No, no, no, no, wait a minute.
There's an opportunity here.
If we can get Dr. Cole
into East Germany
without arousing O.S.I. suspicion
we'll be that much ahead
of the game, hmm?
Sure, but how?
Now, suppose we use these two men,
Teak and Crowley.
Their animosity toward Cole is
public knowledge.
We'll hire them to kidnap Cole.
We get Cole and let everyone think
that Teak and Crowley
were the ones involved.
And no one will suspect
we have the Minerva Code.
Mmm-hmm.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
Come on, let's find a table.
Okay, but not too near
the orchestra here.
I've got very sensitive ears.
Well, lookee who we got here.
Big city hot-shot come down to
show off again.
Wanna shoot some pool, sucker?
Aw, he's afraid his girl is going to see him
get whomped.
You know, I think Teak's right,
'cause there's two things
I can whip your tail at,
it's rodeo and shooting pool.
Ain't that it?
What do you say, chicken lips?
Gonna shoot pool or you gonna hide
behind her skirts?
Heck, I'll even... I'll even give you
first crack.
I'll shoot you a little pool.
Billy, can I break it for you?
Sure.
Yup.
CROWLEY: Lookee here, Teak. She must think
she's Minnesota Fats.
(CROWLEY LAUGHING)
TEAK: Now, make sure you don't
miss the cue ball, honey.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Oh, those must have been some old balls.
(NERVOUS CHUCKLE)
I guess we can't play anymore.
Sorry about that.
Come on.
I'm starving, Billy.
Hey...
How'd you do that?
I haven't the faintest idea
how I did that.
What's good here?
The steaks aren't too bad.
When they finish with the livestock
over at the rodeo,
they send them over here.
I would like to have the Ranch House Special,
medium,
with a baked potato, lots of butter
and no sour cream.
Sounds good.
I'll make it two.
Couple of drafts?
That Crowley and his friend
certainly are down on you.
Well, I can't really blame them.
They're hard riding guys, work all the rodeos
in this area.
I guess I'd get ticked off too
if some computerjockey
breezed in here
and won some points away
from them
and then took off again
to the big city.
Computer jockey?
Mathematician.
Weekdays.
Bartender! Rye.
Just leave the bottle.
You shouldn't have to apologize
for being good.
I mean, even if it is just
a hobby for you.
It seems like I don't fit in
anywhere.
When I'm out on the rodeo circuit
I'm the brainy scientist
and when I'm in the office
I'm the hayseed cowboy.
Seems like I'm always
on the outside looking in.
Well, I guess it's about time
to have a serious discussion
with Dr. Cole.
Let's go.
Hey, buffalo chip.
It's time to break your arm again
like we did in Calgary.
Then we're gonna throw you right back
into the compost heap
where you come from.
Well, that's just wonderful, boys,
but I haven't finished my dinner yet.
Oh, yes, you have.
Ow!
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(GROANING)
Ow! What happened?
JAIME: Oh, they just had
a little too much to drink.
They're falling all over themselves.
Can't we go someplace where it's a little
more quiet?
Where it's a little more quiet?
Not on your life. This calls
for celebrating.
Come here.
Come here.
Hey, Ruby...
Oh, I don't know...
I don't know what happened.
I think Cole must have
shoved me, huh?
But how could he have
done that to you
and decked me at the same time?
I don't know.
I'm telling you,
I've had it with him.
The next time I see him,
he's gonna be buzzard bait.
Excuse me, but I couldn't
help overhearing.
There's a much better way
if you’ll listen to me.
Who are you, mister?
Not a friend of yours.
But at least, we both want
the same thing.
Oh, now, just what's that
supposed to mean?
I want Dr. Cole delivered to me.
Now, if you’re interested,
I'll tell you exactly how to handle it.
And it's worth $5,000
for each of you.
Well, now...
Mister, you... you just might have
yourself a deal.
Oh, give me a home
Where computers don't roam
And the spies and the ciphers don't...
(SHUSHING)
Come on, you're gonna wake up the whole place.
Okay?
Hey, look, I...
Where'd I park my pickup?
It's right here.
All right.
Here, hold on to it, please.
Okay.
Hey, well, listen.
I'm really sorry I got you into
that mess.
The fact is I don't really
like to fight.
I don't like to fight either.
But we didn't have much choice, did we?
Okay, I am going to make you the cutest
little bed you ever saw.
All right.
Whoa. Hold on.
Don't do that on me.
You promised me.
What? I didn't do it.
Hold on. Hold on.
The truck moved a little.
Okay.
Now, please, sir.
Hmm?
It's ready.
In you go.
(GRUNTS)
Come on.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Hey, what's happening?
You're strong.
Your hat.
Head.
There you are.
(SIGHS)
Sweet dreams.
Hey, have I been making
a fool of myself?
No. Just the beer talking loud.
Oh.
You know,
you're some kinda girl.
I never had a girl too long.
I didn't have the time.
Winning that silver buckle
and the right girl.
That'd be getting it all.
Billy, I think there are some things
you should know about me before you start talking
like that.
Like what?
Well, first of all,
I want you to know
that I really do like you too,
and I know that you're gonna know that
somewhere down the line.
It's... it's just that
I'm not exactly what I have been
pretending to be.
Good night, cowboy.
ANNOUNCER: Howdy,
cowboys and cowgirls.
A big, big Templeton hello to our Frontier Days
and Rodeo.
We got a whole day of events planned for you.
Livestock judging competition
will start at 10:00 this morning
on the north side.
And the rodeo competition featuring some of
our best local cowboys
is gonna begin later this afternoon
right in the main arena.
BILLY: Lady, I'm gonna win that little silver
belt buckle today.
These old bones can feel it.
(LAUGHS)
I think this buckle means more to you
than a Nobel Prize in mathematics would.
Well, it's a whole lot
more fun winning it.
Especially with you as my hazer.
Hey, Jaime,
I appreciate what you're doing
for me today.
Appreciate you, too.
You sure you want to
warm up again?
I'm a little saddle sore
from yesterday, you know.
Just once or twice.
And then we got the whole afternoon off
before the event begins.
Okay?
Okay.
You got that drug they gave us?
Huh?
Okay.
Just in case he don't drop like a rock like
that guy said he would,
I got mine ready too.
ANNOUNCER: Hey, Billy Cole now has his
new pretty cowgirl hazer.
Gonna make a practice run
before the competition gets started later
this afternoon.
You ready, hazer?
(SIGHS)
Ready as I'll ever be.
Ready. Let her out.
(BELLOWING)
Ha!
(SNAPS)
Billy!
ANNOUNCER: Oh, bad spell for
Billy Cole.
Looks like Billy's saddle gave way.
Let's all hope that he's going
to be all right.
Looks like...
He's going to be okay.
What are you doing?
Billy?
Just trying to help.
I'll bet you're trying to help.
Lady, he's plum knocked out.
We're just trying to help.
Yeah, we better get him
into the truck.
Wait a minute.
What are you doing?
Well, we got to get him
to first aid.
What truck? It's my truck.
It's right over there.
Just happened to be out there,
did it?
Lady, we're just trying to help.
Listen, I think we'd both be
a lot better off
if you guys would stop trying
to help us.
Now, I think...
Now, honey...
(EXHALES)
Well, what do you know, the little lady done gone
and fainted too.
Yeah. We'd better get them
both over to first aid.
Yeah.
Come on.
CROWLEY:
Just think, Teak,
a few hours and Cole's going to be
out of our lives forever.
How they doing?
Ah, they're still out just like two fat heifers
in the noonday sun.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Boy, that's some kind of stuff.
Okay, now, Janos said he'd meet us
at the old Crowfoot Ranch.
Yeah, when will we get our money?
Radnik will bring that out there
when he flies in to pick up these two
and then it's south of the border
for me and you.
TEAK: Yee-haw!
(CROWLEY LAUGHING)
(GUN FIRING)
(GUN COCKING)
(GUN FIRING)
(CLATTERING)
TEAK: Yee-hoo!
- Bullseye!
Try another one.
Go ahead.
(FIRES)
Yee-hoo! Now, that's some
real turkey shooting.
I wish that turkey in the barn would
make a run for it.
(LAUGHING)
Hey...
I'm real sorry I got you into
this mess, Jaime.
Afraid you've got it backwards,
I'm the one that let you get
into this mess.
Oscar Goldman sent me here
to protect you.
Oh.
So, you ain’t just some little lost bear cub
in the woods, huh?
Well, go on, let's have
the rest of it.
There's not much more to it.
I was supposed to keep you from
getting hurt
and get you back to Washington by Monday.
How were you supposed to do
that little trick?
You're some kind of a ringer,
gonna out-rodeo me?
Oh, I wasn't gonna out-rodeo you.
Look, you work with Max.
I know you know about bionics and...
I'm bionic.
(SCOFFS)
Well, if that don't beat all.
I always said you were something.
I'm beginning to feel better already,
seeing as how I've been took in
by a freak.
I don't deserve that.
I didn't deserve to be lied to either.
You should have known when I first...
when you saw that I was beginning
to like you.
That might have been a good time to tell me
who you were then.
I tried to tell you.
You passed out on me, remember?
Well, maybe I am the pot
calling the kettle black.
I'm the one who's the freak.
I have been all my life.
You know, when I was eight years old
back in Midland,
growing up on a ranch,
I was doing calculus.
I was always the brainy one
back at home in Midland.
But I was the hayseed
at M.I.T.
Billy, you have succeeded
at everything you've tried.
I think you'd be proud of that.
I never really succeeded
at anything.
It's just some trick in my head
that makes me good at math
and that's all it is.
It's just a trick.
You know, my daddy was All Around Champion
Cowboy over 20 years ago.
I was so proud of him.
It's kind a too bad that he never figured out
what made me tick.
If rodeoing is just your way
of proving to somebody what you are,
you should quit it.
I mean, you don't have to prove yourself
to anybody.
Well, couldn't anyway.
He's dead.
Oh.
Look, what nobody seems
to understand is I like it.
I really do.
I mean, when I'm out there riding,
I feel full.
I feel good inside.
It don't come easy and I know
I'm paying for it
with broken bones and all of that,
but if I could've just won that
silver belt buckle...
Hey...
Ah! It's not easy to put into words.
You don't have to put it in words
for me.
If that's the way you feel,
you go for it.
And you just do it.
I said it when I met you,
you're some kind of gal.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
RADNIK: (OVER RADIO)
- Calling ground base.
Zebra Alpha Charlie calling ground base.
JANOS: This is
- Zebra Alpha Charlie.
We're in position. Cargo is ready
for loading.
Very good.
My ETA is approximately
five minutes.
Zebra Alpha Charlie out.
Ground base out.
Oh, well, this "some kinda gal"
better get her act together
and figure something out here.
What do you mean?
If we don't get out of here now,
we're never going to get out of here.
(GRUNTING)
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Now, that is a problem
in stress factors
I wouldn't even want to try to calculate.
Unfortunately, I've only got
one bionic arm here,
and if I pull on these ropes, I'm going to break
my other one
and possibly yours too.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(GRUNTS)
There we go.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Okay, come on.
(GRUNTS)
Thanks.
Sure.
Teak's out there, but I don't see Crowley
or that other guy.
All right, why don't you push the door open
just when I tell you, okay.
Yeah.
Okay. Go.
Well, there's Crowley
out by the loading chute.
Tell me something, do you feel up to
a little bulldogging?
What have you got in mind?
Well I thought maybe you could go out
behind the barn
and around behind him.
I'll go out front and do some hazing
for you.
You know he's got a rifle out there.
Well, I've got a few
surprises left myself.
I mean, we can't just sit around
here waiting
for the posse to show up.
(SIGHS)
All right.
Jaime, just this once,
go wide. Okay?
Hey, turkey.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(GUN FIRING)
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
Nice work, Dr. Cole.
(LAUGHING)
I'd be inclined to say
that you and I could be
a silver buckle team.
Well, thank you, ma'am.
But...
(AIRPLANE SOARING)
I think we've got some loose ends
to tie up. Come on.
Get Cole and the girl.
Right.
Hi, guys.
(BIONIC POWERS ACTIVATING)
(ENGINE ROARING)
Billy, I can't hold it
any longer.
Shut off the engine.
BILLY: End of the line, fella.
Come on.
JAIME: Go faster, Billy.
BILLY: Hey, Jaime. - We're never going
to get back in time.
ANNOUNCER: That's cowboy - Gil Carson up there
on Range war.
And uh-oh, that's it for Gil.
Next time, cowboy.
(BUZZER BUZZING)
Yes, that's Hank Ferris
on old Thunder and Lightning.
Wow, look at that bronco buck.
He's giving that cowboy a ride.
Oh, my goodness, Hank fell down.
Too bad, cowboy.
Hey, Hank, remember next week.
OSCAR: But I don't understand,
doesn't anybody know
where they were taken?
He's scheduled to ride next.
Wait, that looks like them now.
Jaime! I got here as soon as I found you
and Billy were hurt.
I know, but I haven't time
to talk about it.
Come on.
Okay, okay.
Would you take care of that junk
in the truck?
Oh, Billy, I think we're going
to make it.
ANNOUNCER: That'll teach old Red Eye who's boss
around here.
(BUZZER BUZZING)
A great ride.
There ain't too many cowboys
who can stay on old Red Eye, that long.
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
It's Frank Louis up on Dynamite.
Cowboy's good to go.
He's got a good ride
from Dynamite too.
Hmm. That bronc is tough today, folks.
Frank's hanging in there. Good.
A tough cowboy.
Dynamite is...
Oh! Oh, down goes Frank.
Let's have a good hand
for a good man, a good cowboy.
Next time, Frank.
Jaime, just one thing.
No bionics, okay?
I want to win this on my own or not at all.
I wouldn't have it any other way,
my friend.
Come on.
ANNOUNCER: He looks okay now,
doesn't he?
He'll be wearing number 152 and
he'll be up on Diablo.
A real hard-riding bronc.
Old Billy though, is the leader
on the East Texas Rodeo Circuit
with 97 points.
And you know a win right here
will put Billy Cole over the top
and earn him All Around Cowboy
award honors
as well as the symbolic
Silver Buckle.
So, come on, cowboy!
Oh, here he comes.
Whoo!
Look at old Diablo buck.
He's gonna have a tough time
getting rid of Billy, though.
(CONTINUES CHATTERING)
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
(BUZZER BUZZING)
He's made it. A good ride,
cowboy.
A good ride.
Fantastic ride, Billy.
Yeah.
Hope it's enough.
ANNOUNCER: And here it is.
- We have the winner.
Billy Cole.
That makes Billy the All Around
Cowboy award winner
of the East Texas Rodeo Circuit.
Attaboy, Billy.
Congratulations.
Well, a deal's a deal.
See you back in Washington.
You don't have to go back there, Billy.
You don't fit in.
I've decided that I'm going to
have you transferred
from Washington to the O.S.I. facility
in Colorado Springs.
You'll be near the outdoors
and you can do the things you like to.
Max'll be waiting for you
when you get there.
I'll...
I'll see you later.
Okay.
That's fantastic.
(CHUCKLES)
That's so pretty.
Yeah.
I want you to have it.
Oh, come on, Billy.
I can't take that.
I know how much that means to you.
Well, winning it did mean a lot.
But having it just...
Besides, if you got it,
I figure I'm entitled
to visiting privileges
every now and then.
How do you figure it?
Hmm?
Yeah.