The Big Bang Theory (2007–…): Season 9, Episode 10 - The Earworm Reverberation - full transcript

Sheldon has a revelation when he realizes why a song was stuck in his head. Meanwhile, Amy invites Dave over for dinner despite their previously awkward date, and Howard and Raj become obsessed with a fan of their band.

Sheldon Cooper's
descent into madness...

day two.

It's 2:25 a.m.,

and I feel the urge to urinate.

My normal urination time
is 7:10 a.m.,

but here I am,
in the middle of the night,

struggling to keep my mind sharp

and my pajamas dry.

It's only a matter of time

before my tenuous grasp
on reality fades.

I suppose I should pee while
I still know what a toilet is.



(hums tune)

(repeats tune)

(repeats tune)

Since when do you hum songs?

What are you talking
about?

You were just humming.
Are you sure?

Sometimes when my brain
really gets moving,

it makes noise.

How does your brain feel about
calculating the surface tension

of the domain walls?

Let's see.

(begins tune)

Hey! I was humming.

One point
for Hufflepuff.



(repeats tune)

What song is that?

Well... Hum it again.

(repeats tune)

Is that the SpongeBob song?

(to same tune): ♪ Who lives
in a pineapple ♪ Nope.

Whatever. Can we just
get back to this?

I feel like I know
what song that is,

but I can't put
my finger on it.

♪ My country, 'tis of thee ♪
No.

It's just an earworm.
It'll come to you.

Okay.

♪ R-E-S-P-E-C-T ♪

No.

Is this what we're doing
the rest of the night?

♪ I'm surprised
you have to ask... ♪

♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪

♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪

♪ The Earth began to cool ♪

♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪

♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪

♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪

♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪

♪ Bang! ♪

Hello, yes, I was hoping
you could help me.

What song is this?
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la. ♪

You don't know?

Well, how dare you
call yourselves

a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame?

My goodness. Do you sing along
to the greatest hits

of Elvis Presley
with that mouth?

Well, they were no help at all.
Which is crazy,

since rock and roll is all
about good customer service.

Yeah. So you have a song
stuck in your head.

It happens to everybody.

Well, I'm not everybody.
I have an eidetic memory.

I should be able to remember
what song this is,

but I can't.

Something's wrong with me.

I told you if we were patient,
he'd figure it out for himself.

Oh... I was always afraid
this day would come.

This might be the first step
of my descent into madness,

where I gradually test
the limits of public nudity.

Public nudity?

Eh, that just means
going barefoot.

(sighs)

(phone line ringing)

Hello?
Hi, Dave.

Uh, it's Amy.

Oh. How are you?
I'm fine. How are you?

Terrific. And pleasantly
surprised to hear from you,

given how I acted
on our last date.

Yeah, well,

we both made mistakes, you know.

I took the last breadstick,
you gushed over my ex-boyfriend

like he was Leonard Nimoy
and you were my ex-boyfriend.

So, to what do I owe
the pleasure?

Well, I was wondering

if you'd like to get dinner
again sometime.

Yes, please.

Great.
Let me just check

my schedule, he said,

trying to seem like a man
with things on his schedule.

How 'bout Saturday?

Uh, hmm...

Let me see. Uh, Friday,

farmers' market with Jay Z.

Sunday, piano shopping
with Elton John.

Saturday works.

Oh. Did you know,
at the United Nations,

there's a Department
for Outer Space Affairs?

Really? Why?

They exist
in case we ever make contact

with an alien civilization.

Mm, boy, that's one of those
jobs that's boring, boring,

boring, then, "Oh, God!

Where's the memo
with what we do now?!"

(phone chimes)

Oh, this is cool.

So, a few weeks ago,
I set up a fan page

on Facebook for our band and...
Wait a second.

How could you do that
without consulting me?

It's not a big deal.

It just took, like,
five minutes to set up.

That's not the point.

When we created
Footprints on the Moon,

we agreed that every band
decision would be mutual.

Now you're just trying to
take over the whole thing.

You know,
maybe I should go solo.

But someone joined
our page.

We have an actual fan.

All right.

This thing's bigger than you
and me-- band's back together.

So, listen to what he wrote.

Uh, "I saw you play
at the comic book store.

You guys rock."

And then there's
a animated smiley face

raising the roof like this...

We did raise the roof
that night.

Yeah, we totally did.
Why do rock stars

do drugs when this feels
so great?
(chuckles)

♪ Why can't I recall
this song? ♪

♪ This is taking
far too long. ♪

♪ The urge to bang my
head against the wall ♪

♪ Again and again and again and
again and again is strong. ♪

Put on some headphones.
♪ No ♪

♪ They make my earlobes sweat. ♪

Uh, sweetie, why don't
you take a break

and do something
else for a while?

There was a project I've
been thinking about starting.

Okay, great. What is it?

I'll show you.

Dear Crazy Future Sheldon,

you were driven mad
by an earworm.

Your mind,
once your most trusted asset,

is now a sack of parrots
and monkeys.

So...

I'm going to tell you
everything you need to know.

Uh, first, music is dangerous.

The movie Footloose tried to
warn us, but we wouldn't listen.

Oh, wait.
♪ Everybody cut footloo... ♪

Nope.

I'll pay $1,000 to watch you
cut footloose.

This is Penny.

She is your friend.

If she offers you food,
it's safe to take it.

You probably
paid for it, anyway.

So, you're really going out
with Dave again?

Why not?

He's actually a very nice guy.

But he spent an entire date

talking about how much
he loves Sheldon.

That's nothing Sheldon
hasn't done before.

Dave's just a big
fan of his work.

Besides, he said he
wouldn't bring it up again.

Okay. So where's he taking you?

Oh, he's coming here.
I'm actually making dinner.

Oh. That's a big step.

It is?

Yeah. You're inviting him
into your home.

It's intimate.

It's where your underpants live.

You know what? Good.

I tried to get back together
with Sheldon; he shot me down;

Dave likes me.

Maybe intimate
is what I need.

You sure?

You've never really been
with a man.

Do you really want to start
with one that's six-foot-seven?

Why not?

'Cause it's like taking
your driver's test in a bus.

Maybe we should post a comment
back to our fan and thank him.

What should we write?

How 'bout, uh...
Oh, how 'bout,

"We might be
Footprints on the Moon,

but your kind words sent
us over the moon."

Someday you're gonna make
an amazing grandma.

What do you
want to write?

Something bad-ass,
you know, like...

"Thanks for diggin' our vibe.

"We'll keep rockin'

if you keep rollin'."

Dude, if I was wearing a bra,

I'd throw it at
your head right now.

I'll keep rockin'.
You don't do that.

Okay. I posted it.

So, who is this guy?

Let's see.
Uh, his name is Trent Monaco.

Cool name.
Yeah.

He's 24. He's a deejay.

He brews his own beer.
He's got

awesome tattoos. Dude, he's
got a hot girlfriend, too.

Damn. I don't know if he's
our biggest fan or I'm his.

(phone chimes)

Hey, Trent just liked
our comment.

He is so cool!

No hard feelings,

but I'm throwing my
hypothetical bra at him.

(tune playing on keyboard
in distance)

(tune repeating, slower)

Oh, my God, he won't stop.

How does he keep coming up
with new ways to be annoying?

Nobody knows.
That's why he's number one.

Can you please go talk
to him?

Come on. I take care of him all
day long. You do it for once.

Once? Who got the gum
out of his hair?

What do you want, a medal?
It was your gum.

Fine.
(groans)

I love you.

Who cares?

(tune repeating)

SHELDON: What are you
doing in my room? I...

(banging on keys;
discordant notes sounding)
Stop it! That's mine!

Why are you so strong?!

(keyboard plays
discordant notes)
Problem solved.

(groans)

(grunts)

(sighs)

(tune playing on tuba
in distance)

Oh, yeah,
he got a tuba.

(tune repeats)

Dear Crazy Future Sheldon...

this is a thermostat.

It controls the temperature
of the apartment.

The ideal setting is 72 degrees.

If you find this too cold,
then put on a jacket.

A straitjacket, 'cause 72's
the best and you're crazy.

Now... this...

is your spot.

You're very protective of it.

When anyone else tries
to sit here,

you berate them relentlessly.

It sounds mean, but
somehow you make it adorable.

People are also delighted
by your love of pranks.

(quietly):
For example, Leonard has no idea

what I did to his coffee.

It wasn't "replace it
with Folger's crystals,"

I'll tell you that much.

Hey, can we please
get back to work?

This is Leonard.

He's your best friend
in the world.

All right, just stop.
This is ridiculous.

Sometimes he gets cranky,

but you can trust him
with your life.

And he does more things for you
than I can even begin to list.

Thank you.

Oh, no, he's drinking it.

(gunfire sounding on videogame)

Look at this.

Trent is rebuilding
a vintage motorcycle.

Hmm.
That is so cool!

Old broken things
are so much better

than new things that work.

Who's Trent?

Oh, he's our fan.

Fan of what?
WOLOWITZ: Uh...

(laughs): Did you forget?
We're in a band.

You mean because you played one
time in the comic book store?

And at the children's hospital
until they asked us to leave.

KOOTHRAPPALI:
Hey,

dude, Trent just checked in at
the coffee shop on Fair Oaks.

Really? You want to go
down there and meet him?

Are you stalking him?
That's creepy.

It's not creepy.

I built a Footprints on the Moon
fan page, Trent joined it.

After that, all I did was
check out his profile,

go back in the archive
of his feed

until I found
his Twitter handle.

From there, it was easy to find
him on Instagram, Snapchat

and pretty much track
his every movement.

So if you think that's creepy,
you married the wrong guy.

Maybe I should marry Trent.

Yeah, like she
could get Trent.

(laughing)

This is delicious.

Thank you.

Been a long time since
I had a home-cooked meal.

When you were married,
did your wife cook?

Not at first, no.

But when she began cheating
on me with a French chef,

she became quite the wiz
in the kitchen.

So, a little silver lining.

I suppose.

Yeah. Nothing takes the sting
out of a shattered life

like a properly-seasoned
bowl of onion soup.

How long have you,
uh, lived here?

About five years.

I'm actually thinking
of moving to a better place

now that I don't need
to be so close to...

Well, you know.

I do. The brilliant physicist

that I now know lives
in the area, not that I care.

Yeah. Anyway, he doesn't drive,

so, I pretty much had
to take him everywhere.

Had to or got to?

Sorry.

My fault.
I brought him up.
Yeah.

Well, let's change the subject.

No more mentions
of you-know-who.

(laughs)
That's a cool train.

Where did you get that?

♪ Bah, bah, bum-bum,
bah, bum, bum. ♪

(humming tune)

(gargling song)

This song

is never going to stop.

Have you ever dealt
with something

so relentlessly irritating?

That's a trick
question, right?

Well, I shouldn't
be surprised.

There's a rich history of

brilliant minds
descending into madness.

PENNY:
Come on, Sheldon.

There are plenty of smart people
who don't have mental problems.

Yup, she's right.

For every Newton who had
a psychological issue,

there's an Edison
who was just a jerk.

That could
totally be you.

Empedocles thought he was a god
and jumped into a volcano.

And Pythagoras had

an irrational fear of beans.

Tesla fell madly in love
with a pigeon

who he claimed loved him back.

Maybe he just had bread
in his pocket.

The list extends
outside of science.

Painters like Van Gogh
and Pollock,

chess champion Bobby Fischer,

Brian Wilson of the Beach Boy...

(upbeat pop melody playing)

♪ ...Know if words could say ♪

♪ But darlin',
I'll find a way... ♪

I remember the song!

It's called
"Darlin'" by the Beach Boys!

Oh, thank goodness!

I'm not crazy!

I don't have
to take a pigeon as my bride!

There goes our shot at
him living on the roof.

So, all right, there he is.

So, should we
introduce ourselves?

No! Let him spot us.

KOOTHRAPPALI:
I wonder

if he's listening
to our music right now.

Could you imagine?

What a cool way
for us to meet.

He's playing our song and
looks up, and there we are--

his favorite two-piece acoustic
sci-fi novelty rock band.

And he's, all, like,

"Aren't you the guys from
Footprints on the Moo...?"

Ooh, what is he doing?!

I can't watch.

I-I-It's okay.

Oh, it's okay.
He's done.

Why is he looking at it?!

Eh, no, he's not going
to eat it, is he?

Come on, Trent,
you're better than...

(both groaning)

Let's just go.

Hey, aren't you
the guys...?

Nope!
Never heard of 'em!

♪ ...Know if words could say ♪

♪ But darlin',
I'll find a way... ♪

I wonder why it was
this particular song

that was stuck
in my head.

I don't know.
It's pretty catchy.

Do you even like the Beach Boys?

They have "beach"
right in the name.

What do you think?

Well, now that you can focus
again, what do you say

we get back to surface tension
of domain walls?

Of course. I'm already
seeing a more efficient way

of taming the ultravi...

I know why
the song was in my head.

Why?
It's about Amy.

Okay, look, I know
Amy's like an old lady,

but she's not old enough
to have a song

from the '60s written about her.

It's about
how she made my life better.

Consider the lyrics.

"I was living like half a man.

"Then I couldn't love,
but now I can.

"More soul than

"I ever had.

I love the way
you soften my life."

Well, she did soften your life,
didn't she?

Yes!

She's like
the dryer sheets of my heart!

I have to go.

Aw.

Am I like the dryer
sheets of your heart?

Better. You're the
lint trap of my love.

Aw.

That's an interesting
tie clip.

Oh, thanks.

It's, uh, Avogadro's constant.

It's useful for calculating the
number of atoms in a substance,

or causing regret
in anyone who asks about it.

Oh, I...

I think it's neat.

Oh!
Sorry. Sorry.

No one's ever liked
the tie clip before,

so I just lost
all control. I...

No, it... it's okay,
and we are on a date.

I'm... I'm just
a little nervous.

Well, no need
to be nervous with me.

I'm just a harmless giant
from a foreign land.

You know, I'm just
being silly. I...

I don't know what
I'm waiting for.

(knocking)
SHELDON: Amy?

(knocking)
Amy.

(knocking)
Amy?

That's Sheldon.

You're kidding!
How's my hair?

Sheldon, this-this isn't
a good time.

I don't care.

Amy, there was a song I
couldn't get out of my head.

Eventually, I realized
the song was about you,

and like that earworm, I can't
get you out of my heart.

So, what I'm trying to say is,

you're my heartworm.

The metaphorical kind, not-not
the poodle-killing kind.

W-W-W-What?

If I may...

I believe
what he's saying,

in a charming
and delightful way,

is that he loves you
and wants you back.

Dave Gibbs,
huge fan of your work.

Oh.
Don't mind me.

I'm-I'm sorry; I didn't
realize you were on a date.

No, it-it... it's okay.
Keep going?

Amy, if you want to be
my girlfriend again,

I really want to
be your boyfriend.

I really want that, too.

Good. Because I love you.

I love you, too.

Kiss her,
you brilliant fool!

Well...

I'll let you get
back to your date.

Get back here!

♪ Oh, oh, oh, darlin' ♪

♪ I dream about you often,
my pretty darlin' ♪

♪ I love the way
you soften my... ♪

Okay, then.

I'll, uh, see myself out.

Amy, thank you for dinner.

Dr. Cooper, pleasure
to meet you, sir.

Uh, if perhaps sometime
you have a spare moment,

I'd, uh, love-love
to discuss physics,

or "shoot the breeze,"
as you Yanks say.

Ah. What a lovely evening.