The Beautiful Lie (2015–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Episode #1.2 - full transcript
That was Kingsley.
Dolly's leaving him.
-What?
She caught him with
Gabriela, their au pair.
She's practically a backpacker.
He was begging me to
come home to talk to her.
To the happy couple.
-To the happy couple.
The reason I came here
tonight is to ask you
if you think that you and I
could ever be more than friends.
I wish someone had told you.
I have a boyfriend --a fiance
--and we're madly in love.
Hey... Wait.
I'm married.
-I know.
That's your party inside.
-I don't think it was ever my party.
He's gone. He's left with her.
What if it were true?
What if every person
on Earth had a soulmate?
Chances are you'd never meet,
but what if I'd found mine?
And if it were true, then did we have
a universal, metaphysical
obligation to be together?
Hello?
Beer, please.
What... a... day.
Dad.
That Tennis Australia
lunch went on forever
and I had to drink all their wine.
Dad, you're on me.
-What?
Didn't see you under there, little sneak.
Thank you.
How was your day?
Good, yeah. Busy.
I was in that Nature's
Wellness thing, the vitamin ad.
And who did that?
-Um, Charlotte?
Or Cherie? Cherry?
She was really lovely.
A lovely little someone from somewhere.
And then I picked Kasper
up and went to the park.
And what did you see?
A black rabbit.
What?
-Yeah.
It was a perfect afternoon.
Very good.
Shot.
Skeet didn't believe in soulmates.
The idea of two people
so perfectly compatible
would only cancel each other out.
You need friction, electricity --a spark.
Skeet believed in urgent
and immediate love --
love in the right now.
Only problem was that his 'right now'
was missing the one thing
that he couldn't have --me.
Kitty never wanted to see anyone again.
Herself included.
Cake?
There's nothing funny about this.
Believe me, I'm not laughing.
I'll take you back to bed.
We'll work out what to do in the morning.
No, Kitty. Kitty, no.
Kit...
We're taking you back to Kia
Ora first thing in the morning.
I won't stand back and watch
you do this to yourself again.
Peter was finding it difficult
to distract himself.
He wanted to feel a
connection to someone, anyone,
if only for the duration
of this 13-minute video.
A girl on a website couldn't
possibility say no to him.
Or could she?
Hey.
Righto, get out.
Did I forget you were coming?
We are being spontaneous.
New beginnings, all that.
Dolly wanted to smell grass.
I understand completely.
-Riley.
Mate, an hour of asking 'When are we
gonna get there?' --we are here, OK?
So, get out of the car.
Roam. Be free-range.
Thank you.
He's been spending a lot of time
alone with the children lately.
You're looking great, Doll.
Thank you. Break-ups are
excellent for your looks.
We didn't break up.
You don't know that yet.
It's complicated.
But the heartache is the same.
Righto, well, come on up.
Back on the spot. Bit
further. We'll go again.
Ready? Here we go.
Watch this, Mum.
Watching.
Ready.
-Here it comes.
It's alright, mate.
You'll get the next one.
Concentrate.
-Yep.
One more time.
-Mum, I'm gonna get this one.
Go again.
Great shot.
-Yes. Winner.
In here.
-Mum.
Here we go.
-Yep.
Can they be any more obvious?
She's liking all his pictures.
When you were a baby,
I used to have these
terrible dreams about you,
where a snake would bite you in the
face or you'd fall out of a window.
Mum...
I once watched helplessly
while you drowned in a pool.
I think then you were
swept away by a tidal wave.
Remember that Gypsy woman in Rome
who whispered, 'Be careful, they
will take her,' when she was a baby?
There was that too.
I'm not talking about real life, Phillip.
Wait, where is this going?
Because I feel like you're
damaging me psychologically
three seconds before you abandon me.
Which will give me something
to talk about in group, I guess.
You're our baby girl.
Right now you're going through something
more terrible than in my wildest dreams...
I'm OK this time, Mum.
Well, then, concentrating
on your health for a week
can only be a good thing.
Could you just look at my phone?
Just look --just to
see that I'm not crazy.
Darling, even if Anna is
'liking' Skeet's photos,
it doesn't mean anything
more than liking his photos.
She's a married woman.
Hey, I'd forgotten about the greenhouse.
That's really lovely. You should go there.
We're proud of you.
Yep, I bet Who wouldn't be?
Just clear your soul,
you know? Go for walks.
Climb up to the top of a high
hill as often as you can.
Fuckity fuck.
Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey.
No, no, no, we don't play with
that. We don't play with that.
How about some food, hey? Who's hungry?
Have you guys had lunch? I've
got a cow in the deep freeze.
Charming.
-Is it one of yours?
Yeah, shot it in the back paddock.
-Wow. What do you do?
Do you just, what --you creep up on
it and then, what --chk-chk-pwoh?
Killed from behind.
-Pretty much.
I can see you doing that, you know.
What about the other cows?
Yeah, it doesn't distress
'em like you'd think.
Like an abattoir would.
-God, it'd distress me.
Well, I think it's nice. It's
kinder to do it where they live.
He could shoot you if you like.
A good solution to the financial
ruin you've gotten us into.
I thought you guys were doing well.
We received a preposterous tax bill
calling for some short-term
domestic consolidation.
We? You.
How preposterous?
Jail-time preposterous.
Pete, don't make that face.
I know that face. There's
nothing worse than that face.
Daddy, I found a dead bird.
I retract. That bird's
face is worse than yours.
Feral cats are rife. I've got some
traps I need to check, actually.
I will come for a walk.
I'm going to sit here and
drink wine in the daytime.
Well, wine is something
I do have. You help yourself.
Dammit, I married the wrong man.
Alright, let's go kids.
Dolly is torturing me.
I mean, it's like she's gone on
holiday but she's still at home.
She keeps leaving the kids with me,
which we both know is not a good thing,
and she's started reading and
watching television in the day --
and I'm doing everything.
Well, there is an argument for
'you deserve it', you know.
Yes, there is. I know, and
I agree, but it's just...
I've found one.
.. I underestimated the inventive ways
the woman had of putting both
Gabriela and I in situations
of the most acute awkwardness.
Daddy, a cat.
A cat with a collar.
Yeah. I know this cat.
I hate this cat.
Come here, bub.
What are you doing?
-Picking you up.
Are we dancing or walking?
Well, shall we dance?
-Yes.
Do you want to follow the
cat and have a dance?
Whee, whee, whee, whee, whee.
This is gorgeous. The countryside,
greenery, the unaware beef.
The wine.
-Exactly.
Thank you. We don't come down here enough.
There's no stress. The children
even seem to like each other.
Tree change?
Mate,
-we couldn't live in the country.
What's wrong with the country?
-It's alright for you.
You've got your whole
'lonely man' thing going on.
I do not have a 'lonely man' thing.
-Yes, you do.
All alone out here with your
cat traps and your rifle,
sneaking up on cows and shooting them.
Mate, you need a girlfriend.
The quicker, the better.
I can't. I'm terrible at it.
I don't know where to start.
I can't pretend, you know?
And 'come home with me' sounds like
a ridiculous thing to say to someone.
Come home with me.
-Don't open with that.
Kitty missed out with you, you know?
She doesn't know it yet, but
you'd be the best thing for her.
Are you guys driving home tonight?
He is. We have to get home to Gabriela.
I've been coming in and out
of here since I was 11.
I binged my way up to 70 kilos
and I purged my way down to 40.
Every morning I wake up and I
don't know where I'm meant to be.
It's like I didn't get the invitation
to the day that everyone else did.
But I get up and I put on my fake face
and I can hear myself talking,
but inside I'm thinking, 'Who are you?
You don't even know what you think.
You think nothing. You're stupid, Kitty.'
Last weekend, my fiance...
What a dick.
I'll take that as a comment, Zoe.
You don't know what he did yet.
But it was bad, wasn't it? It was
completely dickish behaviour.
He left me at our engagement party
in front of everyone I know.
I knew it. Dick.
Another comment.
He hasn't even called me back.
-What did you ever see in him?
I saw my whole life with him.
Dick.
Hey, do you want some pyjamas?
They're giving me a
free pair if I buy two.
Sure.
I shouldn't have told you.
It could have been a surprise.
What's this?
I'm tired.
Doll, I drove all the way home.
I put the children to bed. I read
them the same story seven times.
Does that not get a little
bit of credit with you?
Just... Please?
Doll, come on, just...
Just a narrow strip of the
bed, that's all I'm asking for.
Like a sliver.
I'm afraid I don't want
your sliver anywhere near me.
If I just curled up here like this?
And just...
.. just slept?
It's your own time you're wasting.
OK. Alright.
I love you.
-Goodnight.
Go back to bed, Anna.
I just came to tell you that I
can't be texting you anymore.
So, when I don't text back, it's
not because my phone isn't working.
It is. I'm just not texting you anymore.
I just thought we'd go for a walk.
Hey, come on.
It's just walking.
What's that?
It's an arrow.
Look.
-There's another arrow.
Yeah.
Did you do this?
I dunno. Maybe.
Come on.
There's another one.
I built it for you.
It's... it's wonderful.
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
And I got you something.
This is crazy.
This is the only thing that makes sense.
I'm sorry. I shouldn't even be out here.
I... I don't even know why I am.
I'm married... married to a man
who thinks I'm in bed
beside him, and I'm not.
I'm out...
-Stop thinking about it.
I've really got to go home.
Because the more I stand here,
the worse a person I become.
Wait.
This is worse.
This is so much worse.
That's not what I meant.
It's just driving.
Have you spoken to Kitty?
No.
Aren't you worried about her?
Yeah, of course.
You should call her.
You can't just leave someone like that.
What am I going to say?
That you know when you left her
at your own engagement party
it was a really, really bad thing to do
and you're a terrible, terrible person.
I didn't leave by myself.
-Exactly.
So whose fault is that?
I just think that if you
said sorry, we'd feel better.
We?
I've worked out that all the
guys I've ever been attracted to
wear skinny jeans.
That's stupid, right?
Well, everyone has a type. Just
not everyone knows what it is.
I like Asian girls,
and no matter how much I try
to tell myself it's not a thing,
next thing I know, I'm going
down, down, down to Chinatown.
I want to change my attraction.
Skinny jeans isn't even
a personality trait.
They do hypnosis here.
Without skinny jeans, I don't
know who I'd be attracted to.
It could be anyone.
Could be bald men.
It very well could be.
Could be very old men.
I'm not ruling anyone out.
Except boys who wear skinny jeans.
Except boys that wear skinny jeans.
You hear that?
What?
The train track. The metal's
shrinking in the cold.
How can you hear that?
'Cause it's what I do. I listen.
Hear the light?
It's buzzing.
What else?
I can hear... the trucks
down at the docks.
The hum of an air conditioner.
Someone's television.
I can hear the television. I can hear it.
What else?
I can hear my wrist clicking.
Wow, I've never noticed
it like that before.
I like that sound.
It sounds like you.
Can you hear that?
What --the stars?
No, it's, like, um, it's a clinking noise.
Clinking?
Yeah. An aeroplane.
People coming back from their holidays.
There's a tea trolley going down the aisle
and it's making a clinking noise.
And the stewardess is asking
people to raise their tray tables
'cause they're coming in to land.
Yeah. It's the first
flight in from Singapore.
See? Now you're getting the hang of it.
Yeah.
What time is it?
It is 11 o'clock.
Man, I had the weirdest dreams last night.
It was probably the gorgonzola.
It gives you strange dreams.
I thought I woke up and you weren't
in bed and that you'd gone.
You know me, I just crept
out for a drive with my lover
and then fucked him in our front
yard before I came back to bed.
Lucky you.
All I got was a hand job off a fisherman.
Blue cheese? Stuffs with your head.
Wine?
-I don't want it.
It's a 'thanks for not shooting my
cat' offering, and it's for you --
unless you shot her, then it's not.
You're lucky I had two
small children with me,
otherwise I would have.
It's the third time,
Helen. It's always out.
Every time I drive into
town I tell myself,
'Helen, remember to get
a lock for the cat flap,'
and every time, it's
the one thing I forget.
See, this is what drives
me insane about you.
I spend all my time trying to
keep the feral cat numbers down,
and you're sitting across the
hill with an open cat flap.
Hey, whoa. My cat flap isn't THAT open.
Just take the cat and go
before I say something I regret.
I'm just glad I caught
you in such a good mood.
Look, I like cats. It's not
cats I have a problem with.
It's the people who can't keep 'em in.
I find dead wildlife
strewn all over the place.
You know I'm going through
a horrible divorce.
I don't need another person
telling me what I did wrong.
Yeah, yeah. Just keep
your bloody cat inside.
Yeah.
Hey, Pete. You got any jumper leads?
Bottle of wine in it for you.
Do you want to get married?
To you? Nuh.
That's not what I'm asking.
But why? What's wrong with me?
I have no interest in being
another straight girl's rebound.
I'm not asking you to be.
So stop flirting with me.
Do you want to get married or not?
Who'd marry me?
I've never even met the parents
of any of the girls I've dated.
Why not?
I'm not exactly daughter-in-law material.
If you were me, staring down
the barrel of a broken marriage,
what would you do?
Would you move cities?
-Nuh. Who cares?
Um... me.
The dick is not your problem.
Your problem is that you knew
he wasn't into it like you were
and you ignored it.
That's your problem.
Um, he asked me to marry him.
Why would I not believe him?
There were signs all along
the way, weren't there?
Little clues and alarm bells?
But you went on ignoring them
and pretending they didn't mean anything,
pushing him into thinking you were happy.
Why are you being such a bitch?
Because you're just like all
the other first-world people
with their first-world problems.
'I'm fat. My husband's gay. I'm
ageing. My dishwasher broke.'
You're milking it.
I am not.
-You are.
Falling about dramatically,
making sure everyone can
see you in his T-shirt,
crying and moaning and
feigning shock that it ended
when it was never real in the
first place, and you know it.
Now you really are flirting with me.
I'm not that straight, you know?
-Yeah. You're a massive lesbian.
Leave me alone, actually.
Not your precious T-shirt.
Never even heard of them anyway.
I knew it.
I was going to ask you
why you're still single,
but the great part about today
is that now I don't need to.
What's that supposed to mean?
You're truly cranky.
You're like a 60-year-old decrepit
in the body of someone who
happens to be quite handsome.
Yeah, look, I'm sorry, I'm not in
a very social mood at the moment.
Loud and clear.
Hey, how did you even drive here?
The car's not worthy of its parts.
Yeah, to be honest, it was
conking out on the way here.
I had to roll it along
out of gear for a bit.
Whoa.
No?
-No.
God.
I'm sorry, I...
I think I misread this whole thing. I...
I thought that's why
you asked me over here.
What?
-Your text.
I wasn't even sure that
you really had my cat
until you brought her out of the laundry.
I thought you were sending me
some kind of very weird
booty-call message.
What part of 'I have your
cat and I'm gonna shoot it'
says booty call to you?
Well, that's how this whole
thing started, wasn't it?
I thought you were being cute.
-Cute?
Yes. You're very hard to read sometimes.
You can be very odd.
Look, I thought we said we
weren't going to do that anymore.
This.
Yeah, we did.
But I haven't met anyone
since we said that,
and you're obviously not doing any better.
I'm under a lot of stress with my ex,
and frankly, I could use the distraction.
No, I don't want to go
down that path anymore.
I don't want you to think that...
-Jesus Christ, Peter.
I'm nearly 40.
I think I know which path we're
on and which one we're not.
Well, it's not about you.
It's... it's... it's...
You're so serious.
I'm not asking you to
fall in love with me.
? I saw a beggar
? Leanin' on his wooden crutch
? He cried out to me
? You must not ask for so much
? Saw a woman
? Standing
? In her darkened door
? She said, 'Hey, baby
? Why not ask
? Like
? A bird
? On the wire
? Like a drunk
? In an old midnight choir
? I've tried
? In my way
Can you hear that?
Hear what?
Listen. The fridge --it's buzzing.
Probably time to get a new one.
Let's have fun tonight?
I can't...
-Yeah, don't worry.
Just... just leave it.
Should I get a condom?
-Yeah. -Now? -Yep.
OK.
Is it...
-No, it's alright.
Yep.
-Am I squashing you?
No, it's fine.
Jesus.
Just ignore it.
-I am.
OK.
Fatso.
Just keep going. It's alright.
Fatso.
Sorry, keep going.
Fatso.
OK.
What is it? What's wrong? You alright?
No, get out, get out, get out.
Get out.
Did I do something?
-No.
Is it the cat?
-No, I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry. I'm sorry.
I slept with my ex.
I don't know what I'm doing.
I'm a crazy person right now.
Do you think I could still
be in love with him?
I have no idea.
I think I'll make some
tea. You want some tea?
Um, yeah.
OK.
This really is quite
awkward now, isn't it?
Yeah.
Going once. No, going twice.
Anyone beat that?
Sold for $3,000.
Congratulations to you, sir.
Could have bought it at the market
for $40, but here you paid 3,000.
Kitty's gone back to rehab.
-No.
She was an inconsolable mess
after the engagement party
and Mum caught her binging again.
They took her straight in.
Lucky she didn't get any further
with that wanker gutless little prick.
I tell you what, I dream of rehab, though.
That, hospital, or prison --sign me up.
To be locked away where people insist
you have to lie down on your bed
and not move until it's time for your
one hour of sunlight and exercise?
I'm in. God, why are we still
talking when we need champagne?
I would have...
-Hello. Thank you.
No. My bra strap's broken.
How symbolic is that?
You know, it's, like, the last
thing that was holding me up
was this stupid strap, and now look at it.
It's like the whole
world is laughing at me.
What a month I've had.
Tell me if my boob falls out.
-Yeah.
Guess what I've got.
-What?
Cocaine...
-Dolly, are you serious?
You are hilarious.
I found it in Kingsley's stuff
when I was throwing it all
around the room, and at him.
Come on, catch up. I've already had two.
Yes, you can.
-Don't put it...
Everyone's looking now. You're
making a scene. Just go.
I'll catch up with you in a sec.
What are you doing here?
I just came to check on my
girl, see how she's doing,
and then I'll be off.
Your girl?
-Yeah.
You want to help me find her?
What does she look like?
She's beautiful.
Well, there's lots of
beautiful people in the world.
There --is that her?
No. My girl's way more beautiful than her.
She's classy, you know?
She's brilliant.
She's funny and, um,
she wears a cable tie.
Stop. No, stop.
People can see you.
Anna, I just want to be near you.
Well, not here.
Alright, our final auction.
There's no need for an
introduction, ladies and gentlemen.
We all know he's here.
You've seen him, I've seen
him, we all want to be him...
Where's Anna?
-Bathroom.
.. ladies and gentlemen,
our very own national
champion, Alexander Ivin.
You go like that, like this,
and like that, and like this.
What are you doing here?
I can't believe that you're here.
Here.
What have we done?
You know Dolly's here?
And if she saw that you were
here, she would kill you.
Kitty's gone back to rehab.
I mean, this is terrible. It's terrible.
We are awful, awful people.
And amazing.
You are the best thing
that's ever happened to me.
I think I'm gonna die.
I... I still don't think it's working.
I think it's working.
Really?
-Why are you talking so fast?
I think it's working.
Really?
I don't know who I am anymore.
Well, I'm not going to be
the one to stop kissing you.
I've never been much
good at not kissing you.
We're going to be together, Anna.
It's inevitable.
Inevitable?
This is our big prize.
This is not one to miss.
One hour of tennis with
this man, for $2,000.
Do I have $2,000?
Thank you, ma'am. $2,000.
Can anyone beat it?
3,000? Do I hear 3,000?
Lady down the back's got it for $3,000.
But we can go higher.
Let's take it higher.
We can go higher.
We're auctioning this man for $5,000.
Right now.
Going once. Going twice.
$5,000.
It's been a fantastic night.
That's really good.
Thank you for bidding.
It's not over yet while
there's still alcohol...
I want to live simply.
As in alone?
I want to live in the country.
You couldn't live in the country, Doll.
If we sold our house, we'd clear the debt.
Mum and Dad would let us live in
the old house. They'd love it.
It's just sitting there,
being dusty and charming.
It'd just be us again --
you, me, and the kids.
No distractions.
You are the best.
Come here.
Thank you.
It's only a one-hour commute.
I've got a terrible backhand...
No. Anna?
-Jesus.
Sorry.
Hang on. Anna.
Anna. What's going on?
Sorry, hang on, hang on.
Stop, stop, stop, stop.
It just happened.
I... I don't know. I...
It's already done and I didn't
tell you, and I'm sorry, Xander...
What's done? What's happened?
Are you alright?
- Look, is this really necessary?
Can't I just drive her to
wherever she needs to be?
You need to contact your
lawyer, Mr Ivin. Come on.
Anna.
Are you going to tell me
at least what she's done?
Would you just piss off?.
Kitty had every right to be angry,
but in this tiny moment, she wasn't.
She'd spent a large part
of her adult life wallowing
and she wanted to stop.
Peter's dalliance with Helen
hadn't cured him of his heartache.
But being unutterably humiliated
so soon after Kitty's rejection of him,
Peter was able to see something.
He finally saw the funny side.
Gabriela's coming with us to the country.
I once read that if you fall off a cliff,
you can die before you hit the ground.
The shock of seeing the
earth hurtling towards you
can stop your heart.
I was falling, but I didn't
find it frightening at all.
I was free.
The ground was racing towards me,
and it only made me feel more alive.
But then I wondered,
maybe I was dead already.
Maybe I was smashed-up bones and blood
and I just didn't feel
the ground when I hit it.
I'm so sorry, Xander.
Did you sleep with him?
Yes, and I'm sorry...
You made me look like an idiot.
All those people were there, and
you made yourself look cheap.
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...
Stop saying that.
Anna, we made promises in front of people.
We made important, meaningful promises.
All you seem to be worried about
is what other people think...
Maybe you should too, 'cause it's
gonna be all through the media.
It'll be front-page news...
-I love him.
What?
-I do. I...
What does it say?
End it.
I... I will.
You end it, or you will
regret it, I promise you that.
It's over.
Xander just couldn't see
that it was over already.
My husband felt like a
distant memory to me.
In time, I think we'll
forget it ever happened.
You look different.
-You look the same.
I hope I don't look the
same as last time you saw me.
I was stupid then.
If you weren't such a dickless killjoy,
maybe you'd still have a wife.
Dolly's leaving him.
-What?
She caught him with
Gabriela, their au pair.
She's practically a backpacker.
He was begging me to
come home to talk to her.
To the happy couple.
-To the happy couple.
The reason I came here
tonight is to ask you
if you think that you and I
could ever be more than friends.
I wish someone had told you.
I have a boyfriend --a fiance
--and we're madly in love.
Hey... Wait.
I'm married.
-I know.
That's your party inside.
-I don't think it was ever my party.
He's gone. He's left with her.
What if it were true?
What if every person
on Earth had a soulmate?
Chances are you'd never meet,
but what if I'd found mine?
And if it were true, then did we have
a universal, metaphysical
obligation to be together?
Hello?
Beer, please.
What... a... day.
Dad.
That Tennis Australia
lunch went on forever
and I had to drink all their wine.
Dad, you're on me.
-What?
Didn't see you under there, little sneak.
Thank you.
How was your day?
Good, yeah. Busy.
I was in that Nature's
Wellness thing, the vitamin ad.
And who did that?
-Um, Charlotte?
Or Cherie? Cherry?
She was really lovely.
A lovely little someone from somewhere.
And then I picked Kasper
up and went to the park.
And what did you see?
A black rabbit.
What?
-Yeah.
It was a perfect afternoon.
Very good.
Shot.
Skeet didn't believe in soulmates.
The idea of two people
so perfectly compatible
would only cancel each other out.
You need friction, electricity --a spark.
Skeet believed in urgent
and immediate love --
love in the right now.
Only problem was that his 'right now'
was missing the one thing
that he couldn't have --me.
Kitty never wanted to see anyone again.
Herself included.
Cake?
There's nothing funny about this.
Believe me, I'm not laughing.
I'll take you back to bed.
We'll work out what to do in the morning.
No, Kitty. Kitty, no.
Kit...
We're taking you back to Kia
Ora first thing in the morning.
I won't stand back and watch
you do this to yourself again.
Peter was finding it difficult
to distract himself.
He wanted to feel a
connection to someone, anyone,
if only for the duration
of this 13-minute video.
A girl on a website couldn't
possibility say no to him.
Or could she?
Hey.
Righto, get out.
Did I forget you were coming?
We are being spontaneous.
New beginnings, all that.
Dolly wanted to smell grass.
I understand completely.
-Riley.
Mate, an hour of asking 'When are we
gonna get there?' --we are here, OK?
So, get out of the car.
Roam. Be free-range.
Thank you.
He's been spending a lot of time
alone with the children lately.
You're looking great, Doll.
Thank you. Break-ups are
excellent for your looks.
We didn't break up.
You don't know that yet.
It's complicated.
But the heartache is the same.
Righto, well, come on up.
Back on the spot. Bit
further. We'll go again.
Ready? Here we go.
Watch this, Mum.
Watching.
Ready.
-Here it comes.
It's alright, mate.
You'll get the next one.
Concentrate.
-Yep.
One more time.
-Mum, I'm gonna get this one.
Go again.
Great shot.
-Yes. Winner.
In here.
-Mum.
Here we go.
-Yep.
Can they be any more obvious?
She's liking all his pictures.
When you were a baby,
I used to have these
terrible dreams about you,
where a snake would bite you in the
face or you'd fall out of a window.
Mum...
I once watched helplessly
while you drowned in a pool.
I think then you were
swept away by a tidal wave.
Remember that Gypsy woman in Rome
who whispered, 'Be careful, they
will take her,' when she was a baby?
There was that too.
I'm not talking about real life, Phillip.
Wait, where is this going?
Because I feel like you're
damaging me psychologically
three seconds before you abandon me.
Which will give me something
to talk about in group, I guess.
You're our baby girl.
Right now you're going through something
more terrible than in my wildest dreams...
I'm OK this time, Mum.
Well, then, concentrating
on your health for a week
can only be a good thing.
Could you just look at my phone?
Just look --just to
see that I'm not crazy.
Darling, even if Anna is
'liking' Skeet's photos,
it doesn't mean anything
more than liking his photos.
She's a married woman.
Hey, I'd forgotten about the greenhouse.
That's really lovely. You should go there.
We're proud of you.
Yep, I bet Who wouldn't be?
Just clear your soul,
you know? Go for walks.
Climb up to the top of a high
hill as often as you can.
Fuckity fuck.
Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey.
No, no, no, we don't play with
that. We don't play with that.
How about some food, hey? Who's hungry?
Have you guys had lunch? I've
got a cow in the deep freeze.
Charming.
-Is it one of yours?
Yeah, shot it in the back paddock.
-Wow. What do you do?
Do you just, what --you creep up on
it and then, what --chk-chk-pwoh?
Killed from behind.
-Pretty much.
I can see you doing that, you know.
What about the other cows?
Yeah, it doesn't distress
'em like you'd think.
Like an abattoir would.
-God, it'd distress me.
Well, I think it's nice. It's
kinder to do it where they live.
He could shoot you if you like.
A good solution to the financial
ruin you've gotten us into.
I thought you guys were doing well.
We received a preposterous tax bill
calling for some short-term
domestic consolidation.
We? You.
How preposterous?
Jail-time preposterous.
Pete, don't make that face.
I know that face. There's
nothing worse than that face.
Daddy, I found a dead bird.
I retract. That bird's
face is worse than yours.
Feral cats are rife. I've got some
traps I need to check, actually.
I will come for a walk.
I'm going to sit here and
drink wine in the daytime.
Well, wine is something
I do have. You help yourself.
Dammit, I married the wrong man.
Alright, let's go kids.
Dolly is torturing me.
I mean, it's like she's gone on
holiday but she's still at home.
She keeps leaving the kids with me,
which we both know is not a good thing,
and she's started reading and
watching television in the day --
and I'm doing everything.
Well, there is an argument for
'you deserve it', you know.
Yes, there is. I know, and
I agree, but it's just...
I've found one.
.. I underestimated the inventive ways
the woman had of putting both
Gabriela and I in situations
of the most acute awkwardness.
Daddy, a cat.
A cat with a collar.
Yeah. I know this cat.
I hate this cat.
Come here, bub.
What are you doing?
-Picking you up.
Are we dancing or walking?
Well, shall we dance?
-Yes.
Do you want to follow the
cat and have a dance?
Whee, whee, whee, whee, whee.
This is gorgeous. The countryside,
greenery, the unaware beef.
The wine.
-Exactly.
Thank you. We don't come down here enough.
There's no stress. The children
even seem to like each other.
Tree change?
Mate,
-we couldn't live in the country.
What's wrong with the country?
-It's alright for you.
You've got your whole
'lonely man' thing going on.
I do not have a 'lonely man' thing.
-Yes, you do.
All alone out here with your
cat traps and your rifle,
sneaking up on cows and shooting them.
Mate, you need a girlfriend.
The quicker, the better.
I can't. I'm terrible at it.
I don't know where to start.
I can't pretend, you know?
And 'come home with me' sounds like
a ridiculous thing to say to someone.
Come home with me.
-Don't open with that.
Kitty missed out with you, you know?
She doesn't know it yet, but
you'd be the best thing for her.
Are you guys driving home tonight?
He is. We have to get home to Gabriela.
I've been coming in and out
of here since I was 11.
I binged my way up to 70 kilos
and I purged my way down to 40.
Every morning I wake up and I
don't know where I'm meant to be.
It's like I didn't get the invitation
to the day that everyone else did.
But I get up and I put on my fake face
and I can hear myself talking,
but inside I'm thinking, 'Who are you?
You don't even know what you think.
You think nothing. You're stupid, Kitty.'
Last weekend, my fiance...
What a dick.
I'll take that as a comment, Zoe.
You don't know what he did yet.
But it was bad, wasn't it? It was
completely dickish behaviour.
He left me at our engagement party
in front of everyone I know.
I knew it. Dick.
Another comment.
He hasn't even called me back.
-What did you ever see in him?
I saw my whole life with him.
Dick.
Hey, do you want some pyjamas?
They're giving me a
free pair if I buy two.
Sure.
I shouldn't have told you.
It could have been a surprise.
What's this?
I'm tired.
Doll, I drove all the way home.
I put the children to bed. I read
them the same story seven times.
Does that not get a little
bit of credit with you?
Just... Please?
Doll, come on, just...
Just a narrow strip of the
bed, that's all I'm asking for.
Like a sliver.
I'm afraid I don't want
your sliver anywhere near me.
If I just curled up here like this?
And just...
.. just slept?
It's your own time you're wasting.
OK. Alright.
I love you.
-Goodnight.
Go back to bed, Anna.
I just came to tell you that I
can't be texting you anymore.
So, when I don't text back, it's
not because my phone isn't working.
It is. I'm just not texting you anymore.
I just thought we'd go for a walk.
Hey, come on.
It's just walking.
What's that?
It's an arrow.
Look.
-There's another arrow.
Yeah.
Did you do this?
I dunno. Maybe.
Come on.
There's another one.
I built it for you.
It's... it's wonderful.
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
And I got you something.
This is crazy.
This is the only thing that makes sense.
I'm sorry. I shouldn't even be out here.
I... I don't even know why I am.
I'm married... married to a man
who thinks I'm in bed
beside him, and I'm not.
I'm out...
-Stop thinking about it.
I've really got to go home.
Because the more I stand here,
the worse a person I become.
Wait.
This is worse.
This is so much worse.
That's not what I meant.
It's just driving.
Have you spoken to Kitty?
No.
Aren't you worried about her?
Yeah, of course.
You should call her.
You can't just leave someone like that.
What am I going to say?
That you know when you left her
at your own engagement party
it was a really, really bad thing to do
and you're a terrible, terrible person.
I didn't leave by myself.
-Exactly.
So whose fault is that?
I just think that if you
said sorry, we'd feel better.
We?
I've worked out that all the
guys I've ever been attracted to
wear skinny jeans.
That's stupid, right?
Well, everyone has a type. Just
not everyone knows what it is.
I like Asian girls,
and no matter how much I try
to tell myself it's not a thing,
next thing I know, I'm going
down, down, down to Chinatown.
I want to change my attraction.
Skinny jeans isn't even
a personality trait.
They do hypnosis here.
Without skinny jeans, I don't
know who I'd be attracted to.
It could be anyone.
Could be bald men.
It very well could be.
Could be very old men.
I'm not ruling anyone out.
Except boys who wear skinny jeans.
Except boys that wear skinny jeans.
You hear that?
What?
The train track. The metal's
shrinking in the cold.
How can you hear that?
'Cause it's what I do. I listen.
Hear the light?
It's buzzing.
What else?
I can hear... the trucks
down at the docks.
The hum of an air conditioner.
Someone's television.
I can hear the television. I can hear it.
What else?
I can hear my wrist clicking.
Wow, I've never noticed
it like that before.
I like that sound.
It sounds like you.
Can you hear that?
What --the stars?
No, it's, like, um, it's a clinking noise.
Clinking?
Yeah. An aeroplane.
People coming back from their holidays.
There's a tea trolley going down the aisle
and it's making a clinking noise.
And the stewardess is asking
people to raise their tray tables
'cause they're coming in to land.
Yeah. It's the first
flight in from Singapore.
See? Now you're getting the hang of it.
Yeah.
What time is it?
It is 11 o'clock.
Man, I had the weirdest dreams last night.
It was probably the gorgonzola.
It gives you strange dreams.
I thought I woke up and you weren't
in bed and that you'd gone.
You know me, I just crept
out for a drive with my lover
and then fucked him in our front
yard before I came back to bed.
Lucky you.
All I got was a hand job off a fisherman.
Blue cheese? Stuffs with your head.
Wine?
-I don't want it.
It's a 'thanks for not shooting my
cat' offering, and it's for you --
unless you shot her, then it's not.
You're lucky I had two
small children with me,
otherwise I would have.
It's the third time,
Helen. It's always out.
Every time I drive into
town I tell myself,
'Helen, remember to get
a lock for the cat flap,'
and every time, it's
the one thing I forget.
See, this is what drives
me insane about you.
I spend all my time trying to
keep the feral cat numbers down,
and you're sitting across the
hill with an open cat flap.
Hey, whoa. My cat flap isn't THAT open.
Just take the cat and go
before I say something I regret.
I'm just glad I caught
you in such a good mood.
Look, I like cats. It's not
cats I have a problem with.
It's the people who can't keep 'em in.
I find dead wildlife
strewn all over the place.
You know I'm going through
a horrible divorce.
I don't need another person
telling me what I did wrong.
Yeah, yeah. Just keep
your bloody cat inside.
Yeah.
Hey, Pete. You got any jumper leads?
Bottle of wine in it for you.
Do you want to get married?
To you? Nuh.
That's not what I'm asking.
But why? What's wrong with me?
I have no interest in being
another straight girl's rebound.
I'm not asking you to be.
So stop flirting with me.
Do you want to get married or not?
Who'd marry me?
I've never even met the parents
of any of the girls I've dated.
Why not?
I'm not exactly daughter-in-law material.
If you were me, staring down
the barrel of a broken marriage,
what would you do?
Would you move cities?
-Nuh. Who cares?
Um... me.
The dick is not your problem.
Your problem is that you knew
he wasn't into it like you were
and you ignored it.
That's your problem.
Um, he asked me to marry him.
Why would I not believe him?
There were signs all along
the way, weren't there?
Little clues and alarm bells?
But you went on ignoring them
and pretending they didn't mean anything,
pushing him into thinking you were happy.
Why are you being such a bitch?
Because you're just like all
the other first-world people
with their first-world problems.
'I'm fat. My husband's gay. I'm
ageing. My dishwasher broke.'
You're milking it.
I am not.
-You are.
Falling about dramatically,
making sure everyone can
see you in his T-shirt,
crying and moaning and
feigning shock that it ended
when it was never real in the
first place, and you know it.
Now you really are flirting with me.
I'm not that straight, you know?
-Yeah. You're a massive lesbian.
Leave me alone, actually.
Not your precious T-shirt.
Never even heard of them anyway.
I knew it.
I was going to ask you
why you're still single,
but the great part about today
is that now I don't need to.
What's that supposed to mean?
You're truly cranky.
You're like a 60-year-old decrepit
in the body of someone who
happens to be quite handsome.
Yeah, look, I'm sorry, I'm not in
a very social mood at the moment.
Loud and clear.
Hey, how did you even drive here?
The car's not worthy of its parts.
Yeah, to be honest, it was
conking out on the way here.
I had to roll it along
out of gear for a bit.
Whoa.
No?
-No.
God.
I'm sorry, I...
I think I misread this whole thing. I...
I thought that's why
you asked me over here.
What?
-Your text.
I wasn't even sure that
you really had my cat
until you brought her out of the laundry.
I thought you were sending me
some kind of very weird
booty-call message.
What part of 'I have your
cat and I'm gonna shoot it'
says booty call to you?
Well, that's how this whole
thing started, wasn't it?
I thought you were being cute.
-Cute?
Yes. You're very hard to read sometimes.
You can be very odd.
Look, I thought we said we
weren't going to do that anymore.
This.
Yeah, we did.
But I haven't met anyone
since we said that,
and you're obviously not doing any better.
I'm under a lot of stress with my ex,
and frankly, I could use the distraction.
No, I don't want to go
down that path anymore.
I don't want you to think that...
-Jesus Christ, Peter.
I'm nearly 40.
I think I know which path we're
on and which one we're not.
Well, it's not about you.
It's... it's... it's...
You're so serious.
I'm not asking you to
fall in love with me.
? I saw a beggar
? Leanin' on his wooden crutch
? He cried out to me
? You must not ask for so much
? Saw a woman
? Standing
? In her darkened door
? She said, 'Hey, baby
? Why not ask
? Like
? A bird
? On the wire
? Like a drunk
? In an old midnight choir
? I've tried
? In my way
Can you hear that?
Hear what?
Listen. The fridge --it's buzzing.
Probably time to get a new one.
Let's have fun tonight?
I can't...
-Yeah, don't worry.
Just... just leave it.
Should I get a condom?
-Yeah. -Now? -Yep.
OK.
Is it...
-No, it's alright.
Yep.
-Am I squashing you?
No, it's fine.
Jesus.
Just ignore it.
-I am.
OK.
Fatso.
Just keep going. It's alright.
Fatso.
Sorry, keep going.
Fatso.
OK.
What is it? What's wrong? You alright?
No, get out, get out, get out.
Get out.
Did I do something?
-No.
Is it the cat?
-No, I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry. I'm sorry.
I slept with my ex.
I don't know what I'm doing.
I'm a crazy person right now.
Do you think I could still
be in love with him?
I have no idea.
I think I'll make some
tea. You want some tea?
Um, yeah.
OK.
This really is quite
awkward now, isn't it?
Yeah.
Going once. No, going twice.
Anyone beat that?
Sold for $3,000.
Congratulations to you, sir.
Could have bought it at the market
for $40, but here you paid 3,000.
Kitty's gone back to rehab.
-No.
She was an inconsolable mess
after the engagement party
and Mum caught her binging again.
They took her straight in.
Lucky she didn't get any further
with that wanker gutless little prick.
I tell you what, I dream of rehab, though.
That, hospital, or prison --sign me up.
To be locked away where people insist
you have to lie down on your bed
and not move until it's time for your
one hour of sunlight and exercise?
I'm in. God, why are we still
talking when we need champagne?
I would have...
-Hello. Thank you.
No. My bra strap's broken.
How symbolic is that?
You know, it's, like, the last
thing that was holding me up
was this stupid strap, and now look at it.
It's like the whole
world is laughing at me.
What a month I've had.
Tell me if my boob falls out.
-Yeah.
Guess what I've got.
-What?
Cocaine...
-Dolly, are you serious?
You are hilarious.
I found it in Kingsley's stuff
when I was throwing it all
around the room, and at him.
Come on, catch up. I've already had two.
Yes, you can.
-Don't put it...
Everyone's looking now. You're
making a scene. Just go.
I'll catch up with you in a sec.
What are you doing here?
I just came to check on my
girl, see how she's doing,
and then I'll be off.
Your girl?
-Yeah.
You want to help me find her?
What does she look like?
She's beautiful.
Well, there's lots of
beautiful people in the world.
There --is that her?
No. My girl's way more beautiful than her.
She's classy, you know?
She's brilliant.
She's funny and, um,
she wears a cable tie.
Stop. No, stop.
People can see you.
Anna, I just want to be near you.
Well, not here.
Alright, our final auction.
There's no need for an
introduction, ladies and gentlemen.
We all know he's here.
You've seen him, I've seen
him, we all want to be him...
Where's Anna?
-Bathroom.
.. ladies and gentlemen,
our very own national
champion, Alexander Ivin.
You go like that, like this,
and like that, and like this.
What are you doing here?
I can't believe that you're here.
Here.
What have we done?
You know Dolly's here?
And if she saw that you were
here, she would kill you.
Kitty's gone back to rehab.
I mean, this is terrible. It's terrible.
We are awful, awful people.
And amazing.
You are the best thing
that's ever happened to me.
I think I'm gonna die.
I... I still don't think it's working.
I think it's working.
Really?
-Why are you talking so fast?
I think it's working.
Really?
I don't know who I am anymore.
Well, I'm not going to be
the one to stop kissing you.
I've never been much
good at not kissing you.
We're going to be together, Anna.
It's inevitable.
Inevitable?
This is our big prize.
This is not one to miss.
One hour of tennis with
this man, for $2,000.
Do I have $2,000?
Thank you, ma'am. $2,000.
Can anyone beat it?
3,000? Do I hear 3,000?
Lady down the back's got it for $3,000.
But we can go higher.
Let's take it higher.
We can go higher.
We're auctioning this man for $5,000.
Right now.
Going once. Going twice.
$5,000.
It's been a fantastic night.
That's really good.
Thank you for bidding.
It's not over yet while
there's still alcohol...
I want to live simply.
As in alone?
I want to live in the country.
You couldn't live in the country, Doll.
If we sold our house, we'd clear the debt.
Mum and Dad would let us live in
the old house. They'd love it.
It's just sitting there,
being dusty and charming.
It'd just be us again --
you, me, and the kids.
No distractions.
You are the best.
Come here.
Thank you.
It's only a one-hour commute.
I've got a terrible backhand...
No. Anna?
-Jesus.
Sorry.
Hang on. Anna.
Anna. What's going on?
Sorry, hang on, hang on.
Stop, stop, stop, stop.
It just happened.
I... I don't know. I...
It's already done and I didn't
tell you, and I'm sorry, Xander...
What's done? What's happened?
Are you alright?
- Look, is this really necessary?
Can't I just drive her to
wherever she needs to be?
You need to contact your
lawyer, Mr Ivin. Come on.
Anna.
Are you going to tell me
at least what she's done?
Would you just piss off?.
Kitty had every right to be angry,
but in this tiny moment, she wasn't.
She'd spent a large part
of her adult life wallowing
and she wanted to stop.
Peter's dalliance with Helen
hadn't cured him of his heartache.
But being unutterably humiliated
so soon after Kitty's rejection of him,
Peter was able to see something.
He finally saw the funny side.
Gabriela's coming with us to the country.
I once read that if you fall off a cliff,
you can die before you hit the ground.
The shock of seeing the
earth hurtling towards you
can stop your heart.
I was falling, but I didn't
find it frightening at all.
I was free.
The ground was racing towards me,
and it only made me feel more alive.
But then I wondered,
maybe I was dead already.
Maybe I was smashed-up bones and blood
and I just didn't feel
the ground when I hit it.
I'm so sorry, Xander.
Did you sleep with him?
Yes, and I'm sorry...
You made me look like an idiot.
All those people were there, and
you made yourself look cheap.
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...
Stop saying that.
Anna, we made promises in front of people.
We made important, meaningful promises.
All you seem to be worried about
is what other people think...
Maybe you should too, 'cause it's
gonna be all through the media.
It'll be front-page news...
-I love him.
What?
-I do. I...
What does it say?
End it.
I... I will.
You end it, or you will
regret it, I promise you that.
It's over.
Xander just couldn't see
that it was over already.
My husband felt like a
distant memory to me.
In time, I think we'll
forget it ever happened.
You look different.
-You look the same.
I hope I don't look the
same as last time you saw me.
I was stupid then.
If you weren't such a dickless killjoy,
maybe you'd still have a wife.