The Andy Griffith Show (1960–1968): Season 2, Episode 11 - The Pickle Story - full transcript

Woman:
YOO-HOO!

ANYBODY HOME?

OH, CLARA.

COME ON IN.

WELL...

HERE THEY ARE.

OH, YOU'VE BEEN
PUTTING OUT PICKLES.

MM-HMM.

AND I DO BELIEVE THESE ARE
THE BEST ONES I'VE EVER DONE.

OF COURSE,
I'M NOT AN EXPERT.

OH, CLARA JOHNSON, YOU ARE.



ANYONE WHO WINS
THE BLUE RIBBON AT THE FAIR

FOR TEN YEARS IN A ROW?

ELEVEN.

ELEVEN.

AND IT'S JUST POSSIBLE
THESE MAY MAKE IT 12.

JUST THINK OF THAT.

CONFIDENTIALLY,
I'M USING MORE ALLSPICE.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

MMM.

SIMPLY DELICIOUS.

OH, CLARA, THESE
ARE WONDERFUL.

I THINK SO MYSELF.

OH, YOU'RE ENTERING
THE CONTEST, TOO.

NO, NO. THOSE ARE
JUST FOR MY FAMILY.



OH, BUT, BEE,
YOU SHOU ENTER.

WHERE'S YOUR
SPORTING BLOOD?

NO, NO, NO. NO MORE CONTESTS.

CAN'T SAY I HAVEN'T TRIED.

I TRIED FOR TEN YEARS
AND I LOST FOR TEN YEARS.

ELEVEN.

ELEVEN.

WELL, I KNOW YOUR PICKLES
WOULD STAND A WONDERFUL CHANCE.

LET ME TRY ONE.

THEY'RE BETTER
THAN THE OTHERS.

WHAT DO YOU
THINK, CLARA?

OH, UH...

THEY'RE VERY NICE,
VERY NICE INDEED.

THEY'RE QUITE...

PLEASANT AND NICE.

REALLY?

OH, YES, INDEED.

I WOULDN'T CHANGE THEM
ONE SINGLE BIT...

EXCEPT MAYBE THE BRINE
MIGHT BE JUST A TOUCH TOO HEAVY.

I WAS VERY CAREFUL...

BUT THAT'S
THE ONLY THING.

MAYBE AN EXTRA SPRIG
OR TWO OF PARSLEY

STEEPED IN THE VINEGAR.

AND POSSIBLY IF YOU COULD GET
YOUNGER CUCUMBERS

THEY WOULDN'T BE SO SOFT.

AND THEN DRAIN THEM MORE

AND USE FRESHER SPICES.

BUT OTHER THAN THAT,
THEY'RE QUITE NICE.

WELL, I JUST PUT THEM OUT
FOR THE BOYS.

YES. WELL, LET ME LEAVE
MY JAR FOR OPIE.

THANK YOU, CLARA.

SEE YOU LATER.

BYE.

OH, YOU MIGHT TRY
BOILING THE VINEGAR

JUST TWO SECONDS MORE, TOO.

THANK YOU, CLARA.

BUT THEY'RE NICE.

Together:
* OH, I'LL BE THERE

* IN ANSWER TO HER PRAYER

* I'LL TELL MY DARLING MOTHER

* I'LL BE THERE

[ BOTH HUMMING ]

OH, HI, AUNT BEE.

HI.

ANYBODY READY
FOR SOME LUNCH?

OH, WE SURE ARE.

YEAH, BOY.

I HAVE A LITTLE SURPRISE
FOR YOU TODAY.

DID YOU HEAR
THAT, BARNEY?

AUNT BEE'S BROUGHT
US A SURPRISE.

DON'T YOU TELL ME

IT'S SOME OF THAT GOOD
OLD APPLE CRUMB PIE.

BETTER THAN THAT.

YOU MADE POTATO PANCAKES?

NO. EVEN BETTER THAN THAT.

WELL, WHAT?

ROAST BEEF SANDWICH...

UH-HUH.

COLESLAW...

YEAH.

AND HERE'S THE SURPRISE.

SOME OF MY NEW
HOMEMADE PICKLES.

WELL, THAT CERTAINLY
IS A WONDERFUL SURPRISE.

LOOKIT THERE, BARNEY--

AUNT BEE'S BROUGHT US SOME
OF HER HOMEMADE PICKLES.

I SEE.

IT SURE IS WONDERFUL.

YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T
HAVE, AUNT BEE.

THAT'S RIGHT, AUNT BEE.

YOU GO TO WAY YONDER TOO
MUCH TROUBLE TO PLEASE US.

OH, IT'S NO TROUBLE AT ALL.

THERE'S PLENTY.
I MADE EIGHT QUARTS.

EIGHT QUARTS?

OH, AUNT BEE
MADE EIGHT QUARTS.

EIGHT QUARTS.

SO YOU CAN HAVE SOME EVERY DAY.

OH, WELL, I HAD
AN AWFUL BIG BREAKFAST.

I JUST STUFFED MYSELF
SOMETHING TERRIBLE.

YOU OUGHT TO HAVE ROOM
FOR JUST A PICKLE.

HERE YOU ARE.

AND HERE YOU ARE.

YEAH, HERE I AM.

YEAH, THAT'S, UH...

THAT'S HOMEMADE,
ALL RIGHT.

ANYBODY CAN TELL THAT.

A CUTE LITTLE FELLA,
ISN'T IT?

WELL, GO AHEAD AND TASTE IT.

WELL, I-I DON'T WANT
TO WASTE IT

WHEN I'M SO FULL UP
LIKE THIS.

I THINK I'LL JUST WAIT

AND SMOKE IT...
EAT IT AFTER SUPPER.

OH, NONSENSE.

GO AHEAD
AND ENJOY IT NOW.

IF YOU WANT SOME MORE
AFTER SUPPER

I'LL BRING YOU OVER
A WHOLE JAR.

YOU DO LIKE PICKLES

DON'T YOU?

OH, SURE. WHO DON'T?

WELL?

THERE'S NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT.

THAT'S A PICKLE.

YEAH, BOY.

I'M GLAD YOU BOYS
LIKE THEM.

WELL, I DON'T WANT
TO KEEP YOU FROM YOUR WORK.

ENJOY THE PICKLES.

[ DOOR SHUTS ]

WHERE WE THROW THEM?

NO. WAIT.

SHE MIGHT FIND OUT,
AND IT'D BREAK HER HEART.

WELL, WE GOT
TO DO SOMETHING.

WE CAN'T-- SHOO, FLY.

IT'S DEAD.

WELL, WE GOT
TO FIGURE SOME WAY

TO DISPOSE OF
THESE PICKLES

SO THERE WON'T BE
A TRACE OF 'EM.

YEAH, BUT HOW?

I CAN'T UNDERSTAND IT.

WHY DOES SHE KEEP
ON MAKING THEM?

I RECKON LIKE MOST WOMEN

SHE JUST
AUTOMATICALLY FIGURES

THAT ANYTHING HOMEMADE
HAS GOT TO BE BETTER

THAN SOMETHING
FROM THE STORE.

STORE PICKLES ARE TEN TIMES
BETTER THAN THESE.

A HUNDRED TIMES BETTER.

I DON'T KNOW HOW I CAN
FACE THE FUTURE

WHEN I KNOW THERE'S EIGHT QUARTS
OF THESE PICKLES IN IT.

YOU JUST HAD A IDEA THERE.

LET'S EXAMINE
THE SITUATION HERE.

WE'RE MORE OR LESS BOUND
TO CONSUME THE PICKLES

IN THEM JARS, RIGHT?

NOW, IF THEY WAS GOOD
OL' STORE PICKLES

WE COULD EAT THEM.

BUT THEY AIN'T
GOOD OL' STORE PICKLES.

THEY'RE BAD OL' HOME PICKLES.

WE'LL JUST TURN THEM
INTO STORE PICKLES.

HOW?

WE'LL GET EIGHT QUARTS
OF STORE PICKLES

AND PUT 'EM IN
AUNT BEE'S JARS.

AND THEN WE WOULDN'T
HURT HER FEELINGS.

WE COULD EAT THE PICKLES,
AND SHE'D BE TICKLED PINK.

TONIGHT WE GO INTO
OPERATION PICKLE SWITCH.

PICKLE SWITCH.
YOU CHARACTER.

PRETTY GOOD.

THERE'S TWO MORE NOW.

YOU GOT 'EM, BARN?
YEAH.

OPIE,
I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND.

ORDINARILY,
I DON'T APPROVE

OF DOING THINGS
BEHIND FOLKS'S BACK.

I GET IT, PAW.

WE BETTER HUSTLE

WHILE SHE'S STILL
OVER AT MRS. JOHNSON'S.

NOW, YOU KNOW WHY
WE'RE DOING THIS?

'CAUSE WE DON'T WANT
TO HURT AUNT BEE'S FEELINGS

AND YOU DON'T WANT ME
TO GET SICK AGAIN.

I GUESS THAT'S RIGHT.

UNSCREW THEM THINGS.

NOW THE CLOTH.

11 MINUTES. THAT'S NOT BAD.

WE'RE ON SCHEDULE.

NOW, WE GOT TO GET RID
OF AUNT BEE'S PICKLES

IN SUCH A WAY

THAT SHE'LL NEVER
DETECT A SIGN.

YOU CAN TRUST ME.

OPE, GET ON UPSTAIRS.

AUNT BEE'LL BE
BACK ANY SECOND.

OKAY, PAW.

THIS WHOLE THING'S
COME OFF PRETTY SMOOTH.

I'D SAY SO.

GO OUT THIS WAY TO BE SURE
NOT TO RUN INTO AUNT BEE.

HELLO.

OH, HI, AUNT BEE.

I CAME THROUGH THE BACK.

I HAD TO GET SOME THINGS
OFF THE CLOTHESLINE.

BARNEY,
YOU GOING SOMEPLACE?

HUH?

YOUR SUITCASE.

UH... UH... THE SUITCASE?

OH, UH, BARNEY'S, UH...

BARNEY'S GOING ON A TRIP.

AIN'T YA, BARNEY?

UH... TRIP. THAT'S RIGHT.

I'M GOING ON A TRIP.

THAT'S RIGHT.

I'M GONNA VISIT
MY AUN... UH, COUSIN.

UH, I'LL BE BACK
TOMORROW, THOUGH.

I WOULD'VE BROUGHT
MY OWN SUITCASE

BUT IT'S IN THE CLEANERS.

YEAH, HAVE A GOOD TIME.

BYE, BARNEY.

YOU DON'T KNOW HIM, AND
HE DON'T HAVE A PHONE

SO DON'T TRY TO CALL
HIM UP TO CHECK ON IT.

WHAT?

MY COUSIN--
THE ONE I'M VISITING.

WHY SHOULD I DO THAT?

OPIE'S IN BED,
I SUPPOSE.

BYE, BARNEY.
YES, MA'AM.

I JUST DECIDED TO GO
AT THE LAST MINUTE

SO I JUST PICKLED
A FEW THINGS TO...

PICKED A FEW THINGS
TO TAKE WITH ME.

WELL, THAT SOUNDS
LIKE A GOOD IDEA.

OH, UH, WELL...
I'LL BE GOING NOW.

[ JARS CLANG ]

UH...
UH, SHAVING LOTION.

I SHAVE A LOT WHEN I TRAVEL

SO I BROUGHT
SOME LOTION WITH ME.

THAT'S PERFECTLY NATURAL.
EVERYBODY SHAVES.

WELL, MEN, THAT IS,
AND I'M A MAN.

AND SO THERE'S REALLY NOTHING
TO BE SUSPICIOUS ABOUT.

AND IF I WAS YOU, I'D JUST
FORGET THE WHOLE THING.

WELL, BARNEY,
HAVE A NICE TRIP.

I'LL SEE YOU
WHEN YOU GET BACK.

THIS COUSIN OF MINE--

SAY, HE LIVES WAY OVER...

JUST GO.

THAT WAS CLOSE.

YEAH. NOW, GET RID
OF THE YOU-KNOW-WHAT.

GET RID OF WHAT?

OH, THE PICK...!

BYE, AUNT BEE!

I'M LEAVING ON MY TRIP
TO MY COUSIN'S HOUSE...!

WHAT'S UP, OFFICER?
I DO SOMETHING WRONG?

I WASN'T SPEEDING.

OH, NO.

I SEE BY YOUR
LICENSE PLATES

THAT YOU'RE FROM OREGON.

THAT'S RIGHT. PORTLAND.

ON YOUR WAY BACK
THERE NOW, ARE YOU?

AS A MATTER OF FACT, I AM.

UH-HUH.

WHAT'S THE TROUBLE?

OH, NO TROUBLE AT ALL.

LIKE YOU SAID,
YOU WASN'T SPEEDING.

AS A MATTER OF FACT

YOU WAS HANDLING
YOUR CAR SO PERFECT

THAT YOU QUALIFY FOR
OUR SAFE DRIVING AWARD.

SAFE DRIVING AWARD?

THAT'S RIGHT.
AND HERE SHE IS.

MAYBERRY SAYS THANKS
AND HAPPY MOTORING.

HAVE A NICE TRIP NOW

AND DON'T STOP
FOR ANYTHING.

BARNEY, YOU NEVER TOLD US
A THING ABOUT YOUR TRIP.

WHAT TRIP?

OH, OH. THE TRIP.

UH, UH, WELL,
IT WAS JUST FINE, FINE.

THEY WERE JUST
PICKLED TINK TO SEE ME.

I BET THEY DIDN'T
SERVE YOU ANY PICKLES

AS GOOD AS THESE.

THEY SURE ARE TASTY.

THEY'RE THE BEST I EVER HAD.
LET ME HAVE ANOTHER ONE.

ALL RIGHT.

I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU BOYS
EAT SO MANY PICKLES.

WELL, THEY'RE JUST PLAIN
IRRESISTIBLE, AUNT BEE.

CARE FOR SOME, OP?

SURE WOULD, PAW.

I THINK I'LL TRY ONE MYSELF.

OH, YEAH, HELP YOURSELF.
YOU'LL LIKE 'EM.

MMM.

SAY, THEY ARE GOOD, AREN'T THEY?

THEY ARE THAT.

AND I WAS
BEGINNING TO THINK

YOU BOYS DIDN'T REALLY
CARE ABOUT MY PICKLES.

OH, NOW, AUNT BEE.

WELL, THEY WEREN'T DISAPPEARING
VERY FAST.

AS A MATTER OF FACT

THIS LAST BATCH
WOULD BE MY VERY LAST.

YOUR LAST?

MM-HMM. I SEE YOU
REALLY DO LIKE THEM.

AND ANOTHER THING.

I DECIDED NOT TO BE
IN THE CONTEST THIS YEAR

BUT, YOU KNOW,
I'VE CHANGED MY MIND.

I THINK I'VE HIT ON
JUST THE RIGHT RECIPE.

GONNA ENTER THE COMPETITION
AFTER ALL.

Y-Y-YOU ARE?

THIS MAY BE THE YEAR

TO BEAT OUT MRS. JOHNSON
FOR THE BLUE RIBBON.

I'M GONNA ENTER THESE PICKLES.

THESE?

THESE?

THESE?

THESE.

IT AIN'T OUR FAULT, ANDY.

WHOEVER WOULD HAVE THOUGHT

SHE'D ACTUALLY ENTER
THEM IN THE CONTEST?

WELL, THE THING
THAT BOTHERS ME

IS THEM'S GOOD
STORE PICKLES, BARNEY.

SHE MIGHT EVEN WIN
THAT CONTEST,

AND IT WOULDN'T BE FAIR
TO THE OTHERS.

WELL, WHAT'S WRONG
WITH HER WINNING?

AFTER 11 YEARS OF TRYING,

SHE'S CERTAINLY ENTITLED
TO ONE BLUE RIBBON.

BUT THEY'RE NOT
HER PICKLES.

YEAH, WELL, IT MEANS
SO MUCH TO HER.

WELL, YEAH, IT DOES THAT.

YOU KNOW, IF SHE DID WIN,
IT MIGHT BE A GOOD JOKE.

[ CHUCKLING ]

IMAGINE AUNT BEE WALKING OFF
WITH A FIXED PICKLE CONTEST.

JUST A HARMLESS
JOKE'S ALL.

YEAH.

SHERIFF, ARE YOU BUSY?

WELL, OF COURSE NOT,
MRS. JOHNSON.

HOW ARE YA, MRS. JOHNSON?

JUST FINE, THANK YOU.

I BROUGHT YA A
LITTLE SOMETHING.

OH, YOU DID?
WHAT?

SOME HOMEMADE
PICKLES.

OH, I DECLARE.

WELL, LOOKIT THERE,
BARNEY.

MRS. JOHNSON BROUGHT US
SOME PICKLES.

UH-HUH.

WELL, I THINK
YOU'LL LIKE THEM.

THEY'RE SORT
OF SPECIAL.

THIS YEAR I WENT
WILD WITH ALLSPICE.

OH, MRS. JOHNSON

I'D HAVE NEVER THOUGHT IT
OF YA.

WELL, AREN'T YOU
GOING TO TASTE ONE?

WELL, THE FACT IS

ME AND BARNEY
JUST HAD A SIZABLE LUNCH.

YEAH, AND I GOT TO GO
OUT ON PATROL.

WOULDN'T DO FOR ME
TO STOP ANYBODY

WITH ALLSPICE
ON MY BREATH.

WELL, AREN'T YOU

GOING TO TRY
JUST ONE?

ME AND BARNEY'LL TRY ONE,
WON'T WE, BARN?

COME ON AND LET'S HAVE ONE
OF MRS. JOHNSON'S PICKLES.

NO, YOU-YOU GO AHEAD, ANDY.
I GOTTA BRING THE CAR AROUND.

BARNEY!

WELL... MAYBE JUST
A LITTLE ONE.

HEY, THESE ARE GOOD.

DO YOU REALLY THINK SO?

MMM, JUST AS FLAVORSOME
AS CAN BE.

OH, I'M GLAD YOU
LIKE THEM SO MUCH.

I DO SPEND AN AWFUL
LOT OF TIME ON THEM.

MAYBE MORE THAN I SHOULD.

WELL, YOU CAN
CERTAINLY TELL IT.

YOU KNOW, WHEN
MR. JOHNSON WAS ALIVE

HE JUST LOVED
THEM SO MUCH.

HE ALWAYS USED
TO SAY TO ME:

"CLARA, WHEN MY TIME
COMES AND I GO TO HEAVEN

"I'LL JUST BET THEY
DON'T PUT DOWN A PICKLE

THAT CAN COMPARE
WITH YOURS."

THAT'S WHAT HE ALWAYS
SAID, REST HIS SOUL.

YEAH.

I GUESS NOW

HE HAS A CHANCE
TO FIND OUT.

I'D SAY CHANCES ARE,
HE IS EXACTLY 100% RIGHT.

DID YOU EVER SEE
MY SCRAPBOOK

WITH ALL THE PRIZES
I'VE WON FOR MY PICKLES?

UH, YES...

I'VE GOT IT RIGHT HERE.
PASTED IN EVERYTHING--

THE BLUE RIBBONS
FROM THE FAIR.

FIRST PLACE EVERY
YEAR FOR 11 YEARS.

THAT'S QUITE A RECORD.

YOU KNOW, WHENEVER I GET
DISCOURAGED OR LONELY

I TAKE OUT MY BOOK
AND LOOK AT MY RIBBONS.

I DON'T KNOW HOW
TO EXPLAIN IT

BUT... IT'S A GREAT COMFORT

TO KNOW THAT THERE'S
SOMETHING I CAN DO.

WHY, I SUPPOSE I'M JUST
A FOOLISH OLD LADY.

OH, WELL, NOW, I WOULDN'T
BELIEVE THAT FOR A MINUTE.

YOU PROBABLY THINK I'M
JUST PUTTING ON AIRS

BUT I DO TRY TO MAKE MY
PICKLES BETTER EVERY YEAR.

IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME.

BARNEY,
WE HAVE GOT US A MESS.

WELL, HOW'S THAT?

WE WAS DEAD WRONG

ABOUT FIGURIN' THAT CONTEST
DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING.

WHAT'S SMALL POTATOES
TO SOME FOLKS

CAN BE MIGHTY
IMPORTANT TO OTHERS.

ARE YOU TALKIN'
ABOUT MRS. JOHNSON?

MM-HMM.

BARNEY, THAT POOR SOUL
JUST LIVES FOR THAT CONTEST

AND IF SHE GOT NOSED OUT
BY A STORE PICKLE

I'D NEVER FORGIVE MYSELF.

BUT, ANDY, LIKE WE SAID,
IT'D JUST BE A LITTLE JOKE.

NO, NOT TO HER,
IT WOULDN'T.

NO CHANCE OF GETTING AUNT BEE'S
OLD PICKLES BACK, IS THERE?

THEY'RE SCATTERED ALL THE WAY
FROM OREGON TO NOVA SCOTIA.

WE GOT TO MAKE THIS CONTEST
FAIR AND SQUARE.

THAT MEANS
THE PICKLES AUNT BEE ENTERS

HAS GOT TO BE
THE PICKLES AUNT BEE MAKES.

BUT THE PICKLES SHE MADE,
THEY'RE GONE.

I KNOW IT.

WE'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO GET HER

TO MAKE ANOTHER BATCH.

YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS.

YOU MEAN YOU ACTUALLY WANT HER

TO MAKE ANOTHER BATCH
OF THEM KEROSENE CUCUMBERS?

[ SIGHS ]

ALL RIGHT.
HOW'RE WE GONNA DO IT?

WELL...

SOMEHOW
BETWEEN NOW AND THE CONTEST

WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO EAT UP

ALL THE STORE PICKLES THAT
AUNT BEE'S GOT ON HAND.

WHY DON'T WE
GET RID OF THEM

THE SAME WAY
WE GOT RID OF THE OTHERS?

NO. THAT WON'T WORK.

SEE, SHE'S GOT TO SEE THEM
PICKLES DISAPPEARIN'

AND SHE'S GOT TO SEE
US LIKIN' 'EM SO MUCH

THAT SHE'LL WANT TO
MAKE ANOTHER BATCH.

OH, ANDY,
I GOTTA TELL YA

NOW, MY HEART
AIN'T IN THIS.

WELL, IT'S NOT SO MUCH
YOUR HEART WE NEED--

IT'S YOUR STOMACH.

NOW, WE GOT TO EAT UP
EIGHT QUARTS OF PICKLES.

LUNCHTIME!

HI, AUNT BEE.

YOU KNOW,
THE MOST TERRIBLE THING--

I WAS FIXING YOUR LUNCH
AND I WENT TO GET SOME PICKLES

AND DO YOU KNOW
THEY'RE ALL GONE?

REALLY?

THEY'RE GONE?

I CAN'T IMAGINE
WHERE THEY WENT.

WELL, I CAN.

I KNOW YOU BOYS
HAVE BEEN EATING A LOT LATELY

BUT I NEVER THOUGHT
WE'D GET THROUGH ALL OF THEM.

THIS IS TERRIBLE.

THE CONTEST IS ALMOST HERE

AND I DON'T HAVE A SINGLE PICKLE
TO ENTER.

OH, IT'S ALL
OUR FAULT

NO TWO WAYS
ABOUT IT.

NO, NO,
I'M GLAD YOU ENJOYED...

WE'RE JUST GLUTTONS.

GLUTTONS, GLUTTONS, GLUTTONS.

I'M JUST ASHAMED
OF BOTH OF US.

AIN'T YOU, BARNEY?

I'VE ALREADY TOLD EVERYBODY
I'M GOING TO ENTER THE CONTEST

AND NOW I'LL LOOK RIDICULOUS
IF I DON'T.

I GUESS
THERE'S NOTHIN' YOU CAN DO

OUTSIDE OF MAKIN' A NEW BATCH.

I GUESS NOT.

HEY, THAT'S A EXCELLENT IDEA

AND AIN'T YOU THE CLEVER ONE
TO THINK OF IT.

WHAT?

WHAT YOU SAID
ABOUT MAKIN' A NEW BATCH.

I DID?

YEAH,
BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO HURRY SOME.

OH...

ANOTHER BATCH-- THAT'S IT.

YEAH, YOU CAN GET
ALL THE STUFF.

MRS. DREDMAR
HAS SOME NICE CUCUMBERS.

YOU GOT LOTS
OF EMPTY JARS.

AND MRS. JOHNSON'LL
LOAN YA SOME SPICES.

YES. I THINK I CAN DO IT.

I'LL JUST PUT OFF
THE SEWIN'.

THE KETTLE'S ALREADY...

KETTLE'S DONE.

OH, MY GOODNESS.
I'M GOING TO HAVE TO HURRY.

OH, YOU GONNA
HAVE TO HURRY.

THEY'RE JUST UP TO THE
PREACHER'S WIFE'S NOW.

OH, I'M SO EXCITED

I JUST CAN'T
STAND IT.

OH, NOW, AUNT BEE,
CALM YOURSELF.

I THINK THIS IS
MY NEIGHBOR'S JAR, THIS JAR.

LOOK, THEY'RE UP TO MINE NOW.

WELL, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY?

KEROSENE?

PRECISELY.

[ CROWD APPLAUDS ]

Andy:
OH, IT'S MRS. JOHNSON AGAIN.

OH, JUST LOOK AT HER.
SHE LOOKS SO HAPPY.

SHE'S FLOATIN'
ON A CLOUD.

WELL, IT MEANS
A LOT TO HER.

I'M SO HAPPY!

CONGRATULATIONS,
MRS. JOHNSON.

CONGRATULATIONS.

JUST IMAGINE--
BLUE RIBBON NUMBER 12.

AND YOU
DESERVED IT, DEAR.

OH, I'M SO HAPPY.

I'M SO VERY HAPPY.

I COULD ALMOST CRY.

I WORKED AND SUFFERED
FOR THIS SO LONG.

YES, WELL,
WE ALL HAVE.

OH, WELL, I MUST GO
AND THANK THE JUDGES.

WHERE DID
THEY GO TO?

UH, THEY'RE
OVER THERE

AT THE WATER FOUNTAIN
WASHIN' THEIR HANDS.

OH.

WELL, AUNT BEE,
MAYBE NEXT YEAR.

OH, IT DOESN'T MATTER.
I DON'T CARE.

AS LONG AS MY FAMILY
LIKES WHAT I MAKE

THAT'S BLUE RIBBON
ENOUGH FOR ME.

GOOD FOR YOU,
AUNT BEE.

ACTUALLY, YOU BOYS ARE
GOING TO BE THE WINNERS.

THAT'S RIGHT.

I MADE A DOUBLE BATCH
THIS TIME,

YOU LIKED MY PICKLES
SO MUCH-- 16 JARS.

16?

16?

16 JARS.

AND I'LL SEE THAT
YOU GET SOME EVERY DAY.

COME ALONG, OPIE.

16 JARS.

WELL, THERE'S ONLY
ONE THING TO DO.

THAT'S WHAT WE SHOULD HAVE
DONE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

YOU MEAN, UH...

LEARN TO LOVE 'EM.

HELP YOURSELF, BARN.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

YO!

YOU COMING TO WORK TODAY?

IS IT 8:00 ALREADY?

ARE YOU KIDDIN'?
IT'S THREE PAST.

I CAN'T HARDLY GET
STARTED THIS MORNING.

JUST LET ME DRINK
MY COFFEE HERE.

SIT DOWN AND HAVE SOME TOAST
AND JELLY OR SOMETHING.

YEAH, I BELIEVE I WILL.

AHH.

IT'S A NICE DAY.

IS IT?

[ SNIFFS ]

YOU BEEN DOING SOME
PAINTING IN HERE?

NO, NO.

[ SNIFFS ]

PROBABLY JUST SOME GLUE OPIE'S
USING ON MODEL AIRPLANES.

NO, DON'T SMELL
LIKE GLUE TO ME.

SMELLS MORE LIKE AMMONIA.

YOU DON'T RECKON THAT GAS
STOVE'S LEAKING, DO YOU?

I FOUND IT.

WHAT?

AUNT BEE WAS A-WORKIN'
IN HERE YESTERDAY.

APPARENTLY AUNT BEE
IS MAKING MARMALADE NOW.

WELL, DON'T JUST
STAND THERE.

GO GET THE SUITCASE.