The Amazing Chan and the Chan Clan (1972): Season 1, Episode 13 - The Gypsy Caper - full transcript

- [man scatting]
- [music plays]

[whistling]

- [whistling]
- [man scatting]

[whistling]

¶ The Amazing Chan ¶

[man scatting]

[buzzer sounding]

[buzzer sounding]

[buzzer sounding]

[buzzer sounding]

¶ That's the Chan plan ¶



[whistling]

[whistling]

[whistling]

¶ The Amazing Chan
and the Chan Clan ¶

¶ The Amazing Chan ¶¶

[man] And now I will show you
our village's most treasured
possession.

- The golden icon.
- [all gasping] Wow!

- [all] Cool!
- [Nancy] Aren't they sweet?

- [Scooter] What's an icon?
- A picture or representation,
Scooter,

- usually religious in origin.
- [Charlie] It must be
extremely valuable.

Oh, the icon is priceless.
It has been here since
our village was founded.

If it's worth that kind of loot,
you're begging for a heist.

Heist? Uh, my English
is not too good.

Your English is fine, Mr. Mayor.



It's my son's that needs
correcting.

[Flip] What I said was it'd be
easy for a crook to steal
that icon.

- [Scooter] Yeah, easy.
- Ah! I see now what you mean.

But the icon is quite safe.
No one in this town would
dream of touching it.

And besides, there's always
a guard at the door.

The gypsies are here.
Mr. Mayor, the gypsies are here.

- [Nancy] Wow! Real gypsies.
- Please excuse me, Mr. Chan.

I must meet their leader
in my office.

- Hey, a dancing bear!
- [music plays]

- [Flip] Look at that!
- [Scooter] Yeah, look at that!

- What an act!
- Wow! I wish I could
dance like that.

Look, tumblers!
Boy, that's neat!

I think it's time we
went back to the hotel.

- [music plays]
- ¶ When I was just a boy ¶

¶ My daddy said to me ¶

¶ You know the apple
shouldn't fall ¶

¶ Too far from
the family tree ¶

¶ Countless generations ¶

¶ Hang their hopes on you ¶

¶ Ages of tradition ¶

¶ Depend on what you do ¶

¶ I'm the number one son
of a number one man ¶

¶ The number one hope
of my family clan ¶

¶ Gonna be like my dad
any way that I can ¶

¶ I am ¶

¶ I'm his number one son ¶

¶ The firstborn of my father ¶

¶ It makes me feel so glad ¶

¶ Whenever people tell me ¶

¶ You're just like your dad ¶

¶ Out of all the fathers ¶

¶ I'm glad that I got mine ¶

¶ Out of all my brothers ¶

¶ I'm the first in line ¶

¶ I'm the number one son
of a number one man ¶

¶ The number one hope
of my family clan ¶¶

- [knocking]
- You may continue practicing.

I will answer the door.

The mayor's compliments,
kind sir.

And he desperately
needs your help.

- May I take you to him?
- Of course.

- Tell me what's wrong.
- [man] Yes, sir.

The golden icon
has been stolen!

Wham, bam,
the mayor's in a jam!

My gypsies did not
steal your icon.

All right then, Aleyko.
Who did?

We do not know. But why is it
gypsies are blamed whenever
anything is missing?

Why not? It is well known
that stealing is a way of life
with you people.

Be careful, little man.

To accuse a man of a crime
simply because he is a gypsy,

or anything else,
is something I cannot stand for.

- He has been warned.
- Enough, Kalo.

[Scooter] Aleyko must be
the gypsies' leader.

Would you call him
a gypsy godfather?

Will you be quiet and listen!

For the last time, I tell you we
did not steal your icon.

And for the last time,
I tell you, if our icon
is not returned by tomorrow,

you and your people will be
thrown in jail until it is!

[all muttering]

Who else would have stolen
the icon?

It had to be Aleyko
and his gang.

And pursuing him will
undoubtedly lead us
to its present location.

Here he comes.

Let's go!

[Henry] Of course it's the
guard! Stanley, he's the only
one that could have done it.

But he said he was
watching the gypsies.

You expect anyone who'd steal
an icon to tell the truth?

Gee, I never thought
of it that way.

There he goes.

[Stanley] Get that icon stealer,
Henry!

Right!

- What are you supposed to be?
- I am a gypsy, can't you tell?

¶ La, la, la, dee, dee ¶

- [humming]
- Will you get out of that
stupid disguise!

[Stanley humming]

OK, gang. We'll just
cruise the area.

- They'll think we're tourists.
- Good idea, chief.

- What do you think, Chu Chu?
- [barks]

Do you think they'd keep the
icon here in the camp?

That's my hunch.
So keep your eyes peeled.

Aleyko's still
on the same trail.
Pick him up, Alan.

Roger, Annie. I got him!
He's heading your way, Suzie.

OK, Alan. I see him.
Get ready, Tom.

Tom? Tom, where are you?

- You all right, Tom?
- Anne, this is fascinating!

I've just discovered
a colony of Hymenoptera.

- Of what-era?
- Ants.

Listen, you kook!
We're supposed to be on a case.

Not a picnic. I think
he should be there by now.

Tom!

He almost stepped on me.

That'll teach you to keep your
mind on business.

- [Stanley] You think he knows
we're following him?
- [Henry] No.

But we better switch to
something inconspicuous
to make sure.

[Stanley] Right. Chan Plan
Seven, coming up!

[buzzing]

[over PA] Vote for Harley Q.
Pedwin for town council.

Vote for Harley Q. Pedwin...

- That's inconspicuous?
- Don't you get it?

- Nobody would ever figure us
for detectives.
- And in your case,

they'd be right,
you dumb-dumb!

[buzzing]

[Henry] That's inconspicuous.

Well, sure, but it doesn't show
any imagination.

Just keep your eye on the guard.

[Flip] "Madame Menya
foretells the future.

Crystal ball readings.
Tarot cards.

- Phrenology."
- What's "phrenelon..."
"phregel..."

- That last word!
- Phrenology.

I think it means reading
the bumps on your head.

Correct, dear child.

No doubt, you wish a reading
of your skull.

Come in, come in.
Madame Menya sees all,

knows all, tells all.

Ah! This bump
should tell us many things.

Yeah, I got that yesterday
when I tripped over a chair.

Yes. Well, it is called
the careless bump.

And it tells us you are
a little careless.

- [all] Wow!
- [Chu Chu whimpers]

- Now, this bump here...
- I got that the day before
yesterday.

- I walked into a lamp.
- Of course.

This is known
as the clumsy bump.

It shows you are very clumsy.

Boy, how does she do it?

I don't know, but I got an idea.

Maybe that crystal ball can tell
us where the icon is.

Here is a beautiful bump.

- Where did you get it?
- I think that one
came with my head.

Excellent. This bump tells us
that some enchanted evening

you will meet a stranger
across a crowded room.

I hope we didn't lose Aleyko.

[Anne] Could you go
a little faster, please?
We're in a hurry.

Thank you.

- I'm beat.
- Same here.

We can't quit now. Aleyko may be
heading for the icon.

Look, a natural source
of instant energy.

- [buzzing]
- Look, it's honey!

Hey, that'll pick us up!

- Won't the bees get mad?
- My zoological studies

have taught me the proper way to
extract honey from a hive.

But first, we must
examine it more closely.

- Be careful, Tom!
- [buzzing]

[Tom] This shouldn't
be too difficult.

- [buzzing]
- Ow!

[Anne] Run!

[Alan] Faster!

Ouch!

[bubbling]

The guard's turning, Henry!
Don't lose him!

- Don't worry!
- Boy, is he in for a surprise
when he...

Oh, boy!
What do we do now?

Alan put in
a new emergency plan X.

- Let's see if it works.
- [clattering]

Get us out of this!

Plan X! Wait till
I get that Alan!

Oh, boy! That's a relief!

Hey! Look where
the guard is going!

[Stanley] Clock factory!
What's he doing there?

[Henry] Let's follow him
and find out!

The disgrace will be too much.
I shall have to leave this town.

- But this is your home.
- [mayor] The icon was my
responsibility.

In fact, I built this shrine
with my own hands!

- That is interesting.
- I cannot stay.
I shall have to leave here.

That is all, young mistress.
You may cross my palm
with silver.

- Uh, Madame Menya?
- Yes, dear boy.

[Flip] Can that crystal ball
tell me something?

[Menya] Anything.
Whatever you wish to know,

the crystal ball will divulge.
Speak your question.

Well, uh, you see, we...

We're tourists and we heard
about a missing icon.

- Can you tell us where it is?
- So!

The missing icon.
You wish to know where it is.

- If it's not too much trouble.
- Very well.

I shall ask the crystal ball.

Falala-caree,
falala-caran,

where has the missing icon gone?

[whimpering]

Who speaks of the icon?

[all] Huh?!

[moaning]

[all] Yikes!

[moaning]

You and your honey!
We may lose Aleyko for good!

Save your breath.

[all] Yikes!

Keep going!

[croaking]

All clear. He's gone.

One more minute
and I'd have needed gills.

I suggest we leave this area
immediately, if not sooner.

- [ticking]
- [Stanley] Spooky place,
huh, Henry?

Keep it down! Sh!
Good spot for the guard
to meet his accomplice.

- What time is it?
- What?

I said, what time is it?

- [cuckoo clock sounding]
- [clocks chiming]

It's six o'clock.

- [cuckoos]
- Who asked you?

I think he's right.
Come on, bird brain.

Well, there's nobody here.

This is just the warehouse part.
Let's keep going.

I got a feeling
the place is deserted.

Henry, I ever tell you the joke
about the clock that didn't
have a face?

- Ten times.
- Oh.

- I wasn't talking to you.
- Who were you talking to?

- This fella back here.
- This... that fella?

[stammering] Back here!

- [both yelling]
- Run, Henry!

- Anybody see that ghost?
- Uh-uh.

- I think we lost him.
- I hope.

Well, let's get going.

We gotta case the rest
of this place.

- Do we have to?
- Sure we have to,

if you're gonna find that icon,
right, Scooter?

- Right, chief.
- Well... Ouch!

That'll give Madame Menya
another bump to read next time.

[snickering]

That creepy guy
is still looking for us.

We've gotta do something.
I have a plan which may succeed.

- It's working!
- Now, if he'll just
go for the handkerchief.

[yelling]

[yelling]

That should hold him
for a while.

Let's get out of here.

I didn't think the joke
was that bad!

Don't talk, run!

We're not doing this right,
Henry.

You mean there's a wrong way
to be chased?

Let's figure it out.
Why are we running
in the first place?

'Cause if we don't, we'll be
clobbered in the second place.

That's what I mean.
Whoever's chasing us,

why don't we chase him
for a while?

Just how do you figure
on doing that?

I'll show you.
Let's hide in there.

[babbling]

Boy, you really scared him,
dumb-dumb.

How'd you know it was me?

- No sing of Aleyko.
- He has to be in that building.

- Why?
- It's the only one in sight.

- Where else could he go?
- I suggest we try it.

- We have no other alternative.
- [Anne] Let's go.

We'll go in the back way.
You and Alan go in the front
so he can't get away.

Hold it down!

- I can't see a thing!
- Just hang on to me.

My night vision is perfect.

I'd better take over
before your perfect vision

gets us clobbered.

- It's a restaurant.
- It's empty!

I guess we were wrong. Aleyko
must have gone someplace else.

[man] It is not enough.
I want more.

- That's Aleyko.
- But that is all I have.

- There is no more.
- We're just in time.

- He's selling the icon.
- Let's apprehend the criminal!

No sale, Aleyko! There's
not gonna be any more.

- You've had it.
- I know I have had it.

But there must be one more
taco in the kitchen.
Or an enchilada.

- Taco?
- Enchilada?

I have been waiting months
for this. I cannot
stand gypsy food!

- Oh, boy!
- [Aleyko] But please,
you must not tell anyone.

They would not let me be
the gypsy leader
if they found out.

Don't worry, Aleyko. We wouldn't
want our pop to find out about
this either.

- Got any more brilliant ideas?
- Yeah.

Let's move it into high gear!

Phew! We sure fooled him that
time, hey, Henry? [laughs]

[choking] You dummy!
You made me swallow the clock!

Don't worry, Henry.
There are a lot more.
They'll never miss it.

- What now, chief?
- Well, I think we should...

- Chu Chu! Where's Chu Chu?
- He was here a minute ago.

There he is!
He's taking dancing lessons!

[barking]

I wish he'd quite fooling around
and tend to business.

- We gotta find that icon.
- We've been looking
for hours.

- Can't we leave now?
- No way.

- We've got a crime to solve.
- Yeah, we got a crime to solve.

- We're tired.
- And I'm hungry.

You wanna be a detective?
You gotta put up with that
kind of stuff.

Till we find that icon,
nothing's gonna make us move.

- Right, Scooter?
- Right, chief.
Nothing's gonna make us move.

- [moaning]
- [all] Yikes!

Move!

Why don't we take
a break for a while, Henry?

Because I wanna find that guard
before he gets rid of the icon.

- Well...
- [buzzing]

I think you're a little fast,
Henry.

One of these days...

[man] I should
get more than that.
I deserve it!

- It's him. It's the guard.
- Well, what are we waiting for?

- You'll get what you deserve.
- Better believe it.

Why, it's our American visitors.

- You bet it is.
- See? Even they think
I deserve more money

as a night watchman.

- Night watchman?
- Here?

Yes. With the icon gone,
there is no need for a guard.

And I need a job.

- We need something too.
- Yeah. [laughs]

A couple of new heads.

[Charlie] Don't bother,
Mr. Mayor.

- It is you, Chan.
- I'm afraid you

won't be allowed
to take the icon when you leave.

- How did you know?
- The wall was too clean.

There was no mark
where the icon had been.

That, plus your having
built this building,

- told the story.
- I guess that wraps up another
caper. Right, Scooter?

Right, chief. Suppose they'll
ever learn not to fool with us
Chans?

[Flip] It's that day again, Pop.

- [chuckles] What day is that?
- Boy.

For a world-famous detective,
you sure forget easy when
allowance time comes around.

Perhaps I was merely testing
your memories.

- We won't forget.
- Very well.

All line up, except Henry,
Nancy and Chu Chu.

- Hey, Pop!
- [barks]

It seems that Nancy owes
Madame Menya a fee

for reading the bumps
on her head.

- Oh, boy.
- And Henry owes for a clock
he swallowed.

Stanley ought to pay
for half of that.

But what does Chu Chu
owe you for?

One dancing lesson
from a gypsy bear.