That Girl (1966–1971): Season 4, Episode 3 - My Part Belongs to Daddy - full transcript

Mrs. Marie, that was just great.

Wonderful. Glad
you enjoyed it, Don.

Leave the tip, Hollinger.
I'll get the check.

We'd better hurry if we're
gonna get to the country club by 8.

Oh, I'll help, Mom. Drink
your coffee. I'm all right.

Thank you.

Donald's never
seen the club show.

It's really something.

Well, tonight are
just the auditions.

Yeah, well, sometimes
they're better than the show.

♪ Folks, here's the story
about Minnie the Moocher ♪



♪ She's a lowdown
hoochie-coocher ♪

Guess whose big
song that is every year.

Is that right, Mr. Marie?
You sing that in the show?

"Is that right, Mr. Marie?
You sing that in the show?"

Certainly. ♪ Hi-de-hi-de ♪

♪ Hi-de-ho ♪

♪ Hi-de-hi-da-hi-de-ho ♪

That's terrific. You
have a great voice...

Mrs. Marie.

Tell you what,
Hollinger, I'll leave the tip.

The food came to about $13.

Mom's really just
his accompanist.

Are you gonna sing
it again this year?

I don't know. That's entirely
up to the new director.



Well, what happened to that nice
little man who always directed?

That nice little man who
was such a brilliant director,

a master in the art of staging,

was transferred yesterday to
Florida by his insurance company.

That's why you wanted us

to come to the auditions.

You're gonna be
the new director.

Wrong. But I have
been instrumental

in recommending a new director

who has not only met with
the approval of the committee,

but who has only
to say "yes..." Yes?

Thank you and congratulations.

That girl?

♪♪ [theme]

I knew you wouldn't let me down.

Daddy, I've never
directed anything.

That's right. Hollinger, please.

I have absolute confidence
in you, even if he doesn't.

Oh, I don't know!

Everyone's expecting you there.

You already told them
I'm gonna be the director?!

Well, not exactly.

Yes, exactly. Come on,
Lou. We've gotta hurry.

Right. Look, sweetheart,
you don't have to

decide this minute.
You can wait an hour.

You want to follow
us in your car?

No, sir, you go
ahead. I know the way.

Okay. Drive
carefully, Hollinger.

You're responsible
for the genius.

I know, but he's
not your father.

You know, honey, despite
your father's constant sarcasm

and refusal to call
me by my first name,

I really think he dislikes me.

Well, in the first
place, that's silly.

And in the second place, it's...

it's really only normal.

And in the third place, I'm
moving over to the fourth place.

You gonna direct the show?

I don't know.

I don't think so.

Maybe.

Is that a multiple
choice answer?

Well, what do you think?

I think it would
be a big mistake.

You don't think I could direct?

No, honey, it's not that.

It's directing your own father.

Wasn't it Cecil B.
DeMille who said

"There are two things a
director should never do:

Direct his own father
and direct Lou Marie."

That was not DeMille. It
was definitely Hollinger.

Yeah, well, Hollinger was right.

Well, maybe.

But you know
something, Donald...

that's the first time
since I left Brewster

that Daddy's even recognized
that I'm in the theater at all.

I mean, and to ask me to
direct his own club's show!

That means he's proud of me!

Yeah, okay, he's proven
that by asking you.

Now, why don't you
do yourself a favor...

Thank him and turn it down.

Why is this whole thing
upsetting you so much?

It's not upsetting me so much.

Well, how come you missed
the road to the country club?

I haven't missed it.

You passed it three minutes ago.

Yeah, well, I... I
admit I passed it,

but I haven't missed it. I mean,

I thought about it a little,

considered dropping it a
note, and hoped it was all right,

but... I haven't
really missed it.

[Man] The sneer is
gone from Casey's lips.

His teeth are
clenched with hate.

He pounds with cruel vengeance

his bat upon the plate.

And now the
pitcher holds the ball,

and now he let's it go.

And now the air is shattered

by the force of Casey's blow.

Harry does this every year.

Good. Then you know
the ending. Let's go.

No, we can't go. Oh,
somewhere in this favored land,

the sun is shining bright.

The band is playing somewhere...

and somewhere hearts are light.

Somewhere, men are laughing.

Somewhere, children shout.

But there is no joy in Mudville.

Mighty Casey has... struck out.

[flatly] struck out.

[someone claps]

Well, what do you think?

Oh, it was great.

They've all been great.

I think a director should
be a little more selective.

Daddy, I haven't
said I'd direct.

You're right. You should wait
until you've seen all the talent.

Wait'll you see me do it

with a catcher's
mask on, Miss Marie.

"Miss" Marie?

Well, yeah. You can't
call a professional director

by her first name.

Dad, if... Look, I'm very sorry

I ruined your ending.

Oh, it's okay, kid.

I mean, see, I just
take a little delay there

for dramatic emphasis.

[chuckles] Well, I'm very sorry.

Well, how would you know?

You're no actor.

Uh, who's next?

Uh, Dorothy Desmond.

Oh, that's me.

Oh, I... I hope you understand.

I have a... [clears
throat] slight cold.

Oh. I hope you're better.

Than Harry.

As a professional,

I'm sure you'll cut
through the huskiness

and find the bell-like quality.

[chuckles]

I... I'm really just
here as a guest.

[clears throat]

♪♪ [piano intro]

♪ Johnny could
only sing one note ♪

♪ And the note
he sang was this ♪

♪ Ah ♪

♪ Ah ♪ ♪♪ [piano
plays correcting note]

♪ Ah ♪
♪♪ [repeats correct note]

♪ Ah ♪

♪ Ah ♪
♪

[whistles] ♪ Ah... ♪

Excuse me.

Dorothy, why don't you wait

till your cold is better.

Oh, that's a good idea.

I'll wait.

Uh, Lou, you're next.

Uh, wait a minute, Lou.

What are you auditioning for?

You got the part.

I mean, you're a
pal of the director.

No, no. Now, wait a minute.

Just a minute, please.

I want to make
it perfectly clear

that I get no favoritism
from the director

simply because she may
turn out to be my daughter.

Isn't that right, Miss Marie?

That's totally right, Mr. Marie.

I'll audition like
everybody else.

And if I'm not good
enough, all she has to do

is tell me. And all I have to do

is spank her.

[laughter]

"Minnie the Moocher."

Professor, if you please.

♪♪ [piano intro]

♪ Now here's a story
about Minnie the moocher ♪

♪ She was a lowdown
hoochie-coocher ♪

♪ She was the
roughest, toughest frail ♪

♪ But Minnie had a
heart as big as a whale ♪

♪ Ho-de-ho-de-ho ♪

♪ Ho-de-ho-de-ho ♪

♪ Rah-de-dah-de-dah ♪

♪ Rah-de-dah-de-dah ♪

♪ Deedle-de-de-de ♪

♪ Deedle-de-de-de ♪

♪ Ho-de-ho-ho-ho ♪

♪ Ho-de-ho-ho-ho ♪

♪ She had a dream 'bout ♪

♪ The King of Sweden ♪

♪ He gave her things... ♪

You know, he really is good.

Like daughter, like father.

♪ Built of gold and steel ♪

♪ A platinum car with
diamond-studded wheels ♪

♪ Wha-de-wha-de-way ♪

♪ Wha-de-wha-de-way ♪

♪ Do-de-de-de-do ♪

♪ Do-de-de-de-do ♪

♪ Hi-de-hi-de-hey ♪

♪ Hi-de-hi-de-hey ♪

♪ Hi-de-hi-de-ho ♪

♪♪ [piano arpeggio]

♪ Poor Min ♪

♪ Poor Min ♪

♪ Poor Min ♪

♪♪ [piano wind-up]

Come on, Mr. Marie,
one more time.

Yeah! Once more!

[Man] Encore!

Please. One performance
a night is enough.

I've got to save myself.

And you all know how
shy Daddy is. [laughter]

Helen, who's next?

Uh, that's everybody.

And you all know...
coffee and doughnuts by

the fireplace.

Miss Marie, have you decided?

Yes. I'm definitely
not doing it.

Good.

But, Donald,
they all think I am,

and I don't know how
to tell them that I'm not.

You see that thing
just south of the nose

and north of the chin?

Sounds like a song title.

It's called a mouth.

It's surrounded by lips.

It's used for kissing,
whistling, or talking.

I didn't know that.
All those things.

Yeah. Now, talking
is where the brain

sends a message
down to the mouth

and words come out.

"No... thanks... Dad... dy."

No... thanks... Dad... dy.

Perfect.

Hi, honey. Can I
get you some coffee?

In a minute. Daddy,
can we please talk?

Sure. When the director
says "Talk," we talk.

Uh, Daddy, I...
I really think...

Uh, now, wait a minute.

I think everybody was a
little nervous performing

in front of a real professional.

Oh, Daddy, please.

Daddy, you keep telling me

that I have to make
my own decisions.

Right.

I mean, everybody
was just great.

But for that kind
of a variety show,

you don't need me to
be the director. Right.

They always do the
same kind of a show,

and the audience loves it.

So for that kind
of variety show,

you really don't need
me to be the director.

I mean, if I were
gonna be the director,

I'd want to do something
different. You know,

a little heavier, more dramatic.

Even a play.

But for a variety show...

Right, sweetheart. I agree
with you one hundred percent.

[chuckles]

Thank you, Daddy.

Hey, group.

Short announcement coming up.

Folks, it looks like
I jumped the gun

a bit too soon. It
really wasn't fair

to assume that Ann
would just walk in here

and say, "Okay,
I'm the director."

Also, she very
wisely pointed out

that we don't really need her

to direct our
old-fashioned variety show.

Come on, that what
we wanted. Right?

Now, hold it.

But when she said
that she'd accept

if we could try something
different this year,

like a real play,

then I knew I had a
genius for a daughter.

[Man] That's a
great idea. Oh, yeah!

The world is waiting for the
new, the modern wonderful!

Yes, uh, that's
terrific, Annie, terrific!

Well, I... I...

Yes, she did, all by herself.

Let's have a toast to Lou

for being smart enough

to have Ann for a
daughter. [laughs]

Straight ahead!

What is the something new?

Yeah, what is it?

Well, uh... I... I
thought we'd...

you... you'd...

That they'd...

I'd...

Is this gonna be one of those
silent trips all the way back home?

No. No, I'll be out of
shock in a second or two.

Oh, it's not that disastrous.

Do you think?

The last thing I remember

is that you were
gonna explain why

you couldn't direct the show.

Well, I did, and it
was going perfectly.

I explained that they didn't
really need me, and Daddy agreed.

And then I said that he could
just as easily do the show,

and he said I was right.

And then I said I didn't
really have the time,

and he said, "Right."

And then I guess I
went one step too far,

and I finally figured
out what my problem is.

What's that?

I can't take "yes"
for an answer.

Good. You're coming along.

Well, it could
turn out to be fun.

Right.

Now, don't you start.

I admit that I didn't
really want to do it

in the first place, but...
now that I am the director...

Donald, did you hear that?

What?

I am the director.

You know, that's a very big step

in a theatrical career,
being a director.

I mean, I've never been
able to say that before.

I am a director.

I mean, I am the director.

Look, Ann.

"Miss Marie."

Miss Marie.

"Miss Marie, sir."

"Sir"?

All right, cut the "sir."

Take it from the top.

Uh...[chuckles] Look, I'm
just gonna make three points,

and then I'm not
gonna say another word.

One, I think you're
gonna go a little bananas

trying to get those
people to learn the play.

Two, they're never gonna
do it to your satisfaction.

And, three, if you don't give
your father the lead in the play,

you're gonna lose
one directing job,

and you also may be
canceled as a daughter.

Now, Donald, that's wrong.

You're wrong. That's
wrong, totally wrong,

and I'll show you
where you're wrong.

Daddy knows that whatever
I do, I'll do for the best.

And whoever I pick, I'll
pick because he's best,

and if I don't pick Daddy,
it's because he's not best.

And he'll know that,
and he'll understand that.

He'll never understand
that, and you're totally right,

and I'm totally wrong,
and I wish I were dead.

Good evening, everybody.

Hi. Hi. Oh, hi, honey.

Have you all read the script?

Oh, yeah. It's marvelous,
Ann, just marvelous.

Oh, good. I cried

in the middle of
the second act...

The part where I say
good-bye to my mother.

Where you say good-bye?

Well, if I get the part, I mean.

[chuckles] Yeah.

Well, uh, are there any
questions before we start?

Well, I thought it was terrific.

I... I read it at work, and
that's why my script's all messy.

Harry's a butcher.

But to tell you the truth,
there's... there's something

that confused
me a little bit. Uh...

what's it all about?

Oh, Harry, there's no
need to be apologetic.

You see, it really
isn't all about anything.

It's... It's more all
about... everything.

Oh, I felt that.

You see, what the
playwright has tried to do

is translate Hamlet's dilemma

into the terms of today's
generation gap problems.

Like, what was the castle
at Ellsinore in Shakespeare

could just as easily be
the campus in our play.

And all the interrelationships

of all the characters are
propelled through time

so that we can relate to them...

in... in a way that... that
applies to each of us...

individually.

You could've asked me.

I think I've just
confused you more.

But you'll all see it
o-once we get started.

So what I'd like to do is
get right to casting the roles.

And... And I want
you to know that I'm...

I'm gonna do my very best

to... to cast each of
you in... in the part

that'll be best for the... for
the production as a whole.

Right.

And I've made a rule, Daddy.

When you say "right,"
I change the subject.

So, uh, anyone who's interested

in reading for the male lead,

uh, just... gather around.

[Harry chuckles]

Um...

Come on, fellas, none of that.

Oh, look, look, you've
earned it on your own.

Go ahead, take it.

I told you before. Just
because I'm her father...

Because you're her father
has nothin' to do with it.

The important thing is
that she's your daughter.

Get up there!

Yeah.

Sit down. Yep.

Now, uh, you'll be
reading for the part

of Ned, Harry.
It's on page nine.

Nine. Yeah. Okay. Okay?

Yeah. [stammers] Uh, you ready?

Yeah. I'm ready.

Okay. Uh, th... This is the part

where Ned is mad. Right?

That's right. You see,

he's the father of a teenager,

and he's failed
with his teenager,

and yet he believes that
he's done everything right.

So, uh, that's the dilemma.

Yeah. Okay.

Uh, you... Are you ready?

[snorting] I can't act.

[chuckles] Yes, you can, Harry.

Now, come on.

Oh, yeah.

[clears throat]

Uh, n-nobody laugh, now.

Okay?

Read it, Harry!

All right, all right.

"Walking into the room..."

Uh, that's the stage direction.

Yeah, but did I do it good?

[quiet chuckling]

I want you to
stay in this place!

Because this must be the place.

[laughter]

Daddy. This is supposed to be

a very sensitive
and serious part.

Now, I want you
to stick to the script.

Now, go on.

Yes. I've searched my heart.

Funny. It was here
when I came in.

[laughter]

Daddy.

I've searched my heart, honey.

And...

we're from two different worlds.

I'll never understand yours,

and least of all,
can I change it.

Oh, Father.

Baby, listen.

You have to... what is it...

do your own thing.

Well, so do I.

Now, I don't know. Um...

I may be wrong, but...

my own thing is simply
loving you and your mother.

I can't change.

[applause]

Thank you, Mr. Brooks. Really.

Thank you so much.

You know...

I love you, Donald.

I know. But I don't want you

to give me the part of your
boyfriend just because of that.

[laughs] You nut.

You know, I just can't
get over that Bob Brooks.

That's great. That's just great.

I mean, he's just...
He's just amazing.

He's so good for
just an amateur.

Yeah. You said that in the car.

So are you gonna give
him the part of Ned?

Well, he's just perfect.

You gonna give
him the part of Ned?

You just asked me that.

I know. I'm just rehearsing you

for when your father asks
you that same question.

Oh, Donald. How did I
ever get myself into this?

Huh. That part between
your nose and your chin.

Daddy really expects
that part, Donald.

The part between your
nose and your chin?

I'm serious, and you're joking.

Good morning. Serious
& Joking. Oh, Donald.

It's for you. They
want Serious. Donald.

Okay, okay. How am I ever

gonna be able to tell Daddy

that Mr. Brooks is better?

Well, you can just explain

that it's for the
good of the show.

Oh, I don't give a hoot

about the good of the show.

All I care about is
the good of Daddy.

I admit I'm a weakling,

but I just can't hurt Daddy.

Now, look. All right, I
understand. I really do.

So why don't you
just give him the part?

Oh, I can't do that, either.

Everybody'll know
I'm only giving it to him

because he's my
father, and they're all

counting on me to do
a good job for them.

Daddy more than anybody's
counting on me to do that.

I can't win, no
matter what I do.

Can you resign?

A week before the production?

Hey, have you ever
had your appendix out?

Now would be a perfect time.

You're not helping.

All right. Then can I
make a suggestion?

Please.

You have a big
problem now. Right?

You've had big problems before.

Why don't you do
what you always do

with your big problems...

Forget it. Let's kiss.

Hey, where is everybody?

In here, sweetheart.

Oh, hi, Daddy.

Hi. Where's Mom?

I sent her out for oregano.

Can't make spaghetti
sauce without oregano.

It's like making
toast without bread.

You're making so much.

Well, it's for the cast
party Saturday night.

I won't get a chance to make
it once we start rehearsing.

The part of Ned is pretty big.

I know.

Don't worry about it, though.

I'll memorize it cold.

You know something, honey?

When I was a waiter,
I used to memorize

32 orders at once...
and who got what.

Yeah. Uh, Daddy, there's
something I have to discuss with you.

And it's something that...

I have to discuss.

Which isn't easy.

But I know I can
because you always said

that I could discuss
anything with you.

And this anything
is... really something.

Okay, sweetheart.

Tell old Dad about
your serious problem.

Well, it's [chuckles]
not really serious.

I mean, like U.N. business.

It's more in the...

things I wish I didn't
have to do... category.

Well, fathers are
supposed to help.

And don't let the
apron fool you.

I'm still your father.

I know.

Uh, Daddy, it's
about Bob Brooks.

Playing the part of Ned?

That's right!

I thought that's what
your problem was.

Well, say no more about it.

I'll do it for you.

I'll tell him you don't
think he's right for the part.

Oh, well... well,
that's not it, exactly.

I mean... I think he
should play the part of Ned.

[thud]

You're kidding!

Well, no. I just thought
from the audition

that he'd be perfect. And you,
because you're so funny and everything,

I thought you'd be terrific

for the funnyman in the park.

Well, I... can't say
that I agree with you,

but you're the
director, and if that's

your decision,
it's... okay with me.

Now, what was the big problem

you wanted to talk to me about?

That's it.

That was the big problem
you wanted to talk to me about?

That you couldn't
give you father

the lead in the
country club play?

Oh, Daddy, I feel awful.

Ann, I'm in the
restaurant business.

I'll tell you what a
big problem really is...

When your chef gets a
72-hour virus on the Wednesday

before the Thanksgiving
Day weekend,

that's a big problem.

60 Jewish war veterans drop
in for dinner after a meeting,

and all you have
left is baked ham.

As a father, that's
where you see problems.

I have a daughter who feels bad

because she doesn't give
you the lead in the play.

Do you think for one minute

that I would ever be the
cause of your problems?

You're wonderful.

To tell the truth, I'm
very proud of you.

Couldn't have been easy to
come to such a wrong decision.

[chuckles] You're right.

The important thing now is
that we have a good show.

You know, Mom's
lucky she caught you.

Or I'd have married you.

Then you'd have to
go out for the oregano.

[chuckles]

♪♪ [piano plays party music]

Oh, what a night, huh?

We oughta all go down
to Max's delicatessen

and wait for the reviews.

Oh, you... you were great, Lou.

You really were.

Thank you, Bob.

You know, they're right.

I know, you big ham.

Boy, if there were reviews,

I can just see them now...

"Supporting player
steals the show."

You were really
great, Mr. Marie.

I think someday you're
gonna be a very big star.

Oh... [chuckles]

Not only is he a great actor,

he is also a great chef.

This is better than
in your restaurant.

Sure. Here, it's free.

Well, when you get your Oscar,

don't forget to thank
the piano player

for inspiration and oregano.

Sorry, but I've gotta give

all the credit to my director.

Thank you, Daddy.

Well? You proud of your old man?

I sure am, Daddy.

But not so much for the acting.

And what was
wrong with my acting?

Oh, it was perfect.

Just that I expected
that much from you.

But the creative genius you
showed in that final scene

when everything was at
its highest emotional pitch!

You liked that, huh?

Are you kidding?

Not even Alfred Lunt or
the great John Barrymore

would've handled that
situation the way you did.

Well, when Bob forgot his lines

right in the most
important part of the show,

I thought it was all over.

So did I.

Only my father Lou Marie

would think fast enough
to have a dead man

jump up off the floor
and sing two full courses

of "Minnie the Moocher."

[chuckles]

I'm gonna go. You're exhausted.

I am not. I always
come alive after a show.

Now, you sit down. I'm gonna get

into something a
little comfortable.

Wait a minute. I think that's
supposed to be my line.

[chuckles] I'll be right back.

Listen, are you sure?

You've been going
nonstop all week.

I'm wide awake.

Well, you're an amazing
lady, Miss Marie.

Rehearsals, recasting,

driving back and forth.

The show, a party,
after the show,

and you're still full of fire.

You want to go down to Nino's?

Honey?

Ann?

Honey?

Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA