That Girl (1966–1971): Season 3, Episode 6 - Secret Ballot - full transcript
It's Halloween. Ann's mind is not on costumes and jack-o-lanterns, but rather the upcoming Presidential election, which will be the first in which she is eligible to vote. She is reading up on as much as she can so that on election day she can make an informed decision, which she believes is the duty of every voter. As Ann and Donald spend the day with her parents, she gets into an argument with her father about her constitutional right to keep her election decisions - even with which party she registered - a secret, and their fundamental differences in how to vote, with Lew historically voting for a party slate regardless of the candidates. Ann, with Donald in tow, storms out of her parent's house because of this argument. Ann may have to make up with her father sooner than later as her forgotten purse in their house makes Ann and Donald need to drive all the way back up to Brewster to retrieve it.
Hope you enjoy it.
Excuse me. Hmm?
May I please leave these
here while I get a few books?
Oh, certainly.
Thank you.
Oh, um, could you direct
me to your political section?
Oh, uh, aisle five, section S.
Thank you. Mm-hmm.
[grunts]
I'd like to check these
books out, please.
All right. Here you are.
Thank you.
Oh, the three latest volumes
of the Congressional Record.
That's a lot of reading.
Well, I want to compare the
legislation that's been proposed
to what these
magazines say is needed.
I see... Oh!
These new machines,
they make me so nervous.
Oh, you got a lot
of magazines, too.
I have articles here
covering all shades of opinion,
from far left, to far right,
to far middle of the road.
Are you writing a thesis?
[chuckles] No. I'm preparing to
vote in my first presidential election.
Ohh. And I want to be informed
on as many issues
as I can think of.
I think the good voter
is the aware voter,
not the voter who votes
off the top of his head.
I agree with you.
There you are. Thank you.
Voting is a great privilege.
But more than that, it's a
sacred trust of a free society.
Young lady, I admire you.
Oh, thank you.
Now, can you handle all this?
Oh, sure. Nothing to it.
Be careful. Oh,
don't worry. I will.
Now, there's someone with
her head on her shoulders.
Who?
That girl.
♪♪ [theme song]
[door buzzes]
Just a minute.
[door buzzes]
Coming!
[prolonged door buzzing]
Trick or treat?
Hi, Donald.
Serves me right.
If I wanted attention, I
should've worn a pointy hat
and blacked out my teeth.
Donald, what's your solution
to the problem of the
migratory farm worker?
Not being a migratory farm
worker, I don't have one.
You don't have
one? Not offhand, no.
What happened to your teeth?
I blacked them out as a joke.
Oh.
You know, the
migratory farm workers
are one of the basic issues
of our domestic farm policy?
Well, that may well be, but
I don't have a solution for it.
Well, before you decide
who you want for president,
you should really read up on it.
Okay, I will.
Now, can we go?
Go where?
Your folks are expecting
us for Halloween.
Oh, yeah, that's right. Wait...
I just want to read this
one other paragraph.
[laughs]
What?
What? What is it?
That's why you were
wearing that funny hat.
Right. You looked cute.
Thank you.
Anyway, what about civil rights?
What's your attitude on that?
Civil rights? I'm
in favor of them.
That's a little vague, Donald.
Do you propose any
specific further legislation?
Look, honey, suppose
we discuss it in the car.
No, we're gonna discuss
the Far East in the car.
Well, can't we
discuss both of them?
We won't have time.
It's only a two-hour drive.
Well, then we can stop
and park for a while.
Oh, you're patronizing me.
I am not. Honey, I'm very happy
that you're taking this
election so seriously.
Well, didn't you the
first time you were able
to vote for the President
of the United States?
Of course I did.
Oh, Donald, I think voting
is more than a privilege.
I think it's a sacred
trust of a free society.
So you told me,
and I agree with you.
Well, I'm just
telling you again.
And I'm agreeing with you again.
And so does your answering
service, your garbage man,
my answering service,
and my garbage man.
And my public librarian,
who said, and I quote,
"Young lady, I admire you."
Young lady, I admire you, too.
It's a little bit like being in
love with Everett Dirksen,
but I admire you. Now, let's go.
Suppose you were president.
What would you do about
the migratory farm workers?
I... I haven't decided.
Well, why not?
Well, I have time.
I can't be president
until I'm 35 years old.
Donald, you're being facetious.
I'm trying to analyze
major campaign issues,
and you're just being facetious.
Honey, look, I realize
this is your first election,
but don't go overboard.
Who, me?
Yes, you.
Don't make such
a big deal out of it
that you become
a... pain in the neck.
A pain in the neck to whom?
Well, to everyone.
To people in general.
See, there you go
being vague again.
And you're also being not nice.
Honey, I'm trying to be helpful.
I merely suggested
tempering your enthusiasm.
Your apology is accepted.
Thank you.
Shall we depart? Yes.
Uh, Senator Dirksen?
Yes, young man?
Uh, you forgot your purse.
[doorbell rings]
I'll get it, Lou.
Hi, Mom. You're
here. I'm so glad.
Welcome to the
suburbs. Hi, Daddy.
How are you? Hello, Mr. Marie.
Hi.
What are all those?
I'm reading several
brilliant articles
on urban renewal.
She's informing
herself on the issues
of the forthcoming election.
Ah, how time flies.
My darling, able
to vote. [chuckles]
I didn't realize, sweetheart.
That's very exciting.
Congratulations.
Thank you, Daddy.
What's your position
on urban renewal?
Well, that all depends.
On what? Some urbans need
renewal, and some urbans don't. [laughs]
Could you be more specific?
No, I could not.
Would you like a drink?
No, no, thank you, sir.
Donald, would you please put
these somewhere near the door?
Certainly. And Lou, you
have to fix the pumpkins.
Oh, we want to help.
Fine. Who's your
candidate, sweetheart?
I haven't decided yet.
I still have a lot
of reading to do.
How did you register? Ooh.
As Miss Ann Marie
of New York City.
He means, did you register
as a Republican or a Democrat?
You always liked
to draw the faces.
[chuckles] Thanks, Mom. Go on.
Well, did you?
Did I what? Register as a
Democrat or Republican?
Oh, yes, I did.
Which one?
Well, I registered as
a... Why do you ask?
'Cause I'm curious.
Well, Daddy, if you don't
mind, I'd rather not tell you.
Why not?
Well, because, if I tell
you how I registered,
then you'll assume
that's how I'll vote.
So?
So, therefore, I'd
rather not tell you.
I don't follow you.
Do you follow her?
Yeah, I think so. She feels
her vote is a personal matter,
between her and her conscience.
That's correct.
You see, the United
States Constitution
provides for a secret ballot.
Uh, Mr. Marie?
Well, do you want
a drink or don't you?
No. No, thank you, sir.
I was about to ask, how's
the restaurant business?
The restaurant business is fine.
Donald, you're not
a very good model.
Smile.
Does the Constitution
provide that a secret ballot
has to be a secret
from your father?
Of course it does.
Okay.
Where are you going? To
get a copy of the Constitution,
so my daughter can
show me where it says
that her father should
mind his own business.
Daddy, it doesn't
actually say that,
but it's obvious.
A secret ballot is a
secret ballot to everybody.
There were fathers before
there were constitutions.
Lou. Daddy.
Do you have to take
everything so personally?
Daddy, if it's any consolation,
I didn't tell Donald
how I registered either.
And I didn't ask her.
What kind of a crack is that?
Oh, Lou. Please don't
get angry. I'm not angry.
Well, then why are your
veins turning purple?
That's astonishment.
[doorbell rings]
I'll get it.
Trick or treat.
Oh, hi. Just a minute.
Oh, Daddy, I don't
want you to be insulted,
but, as Mom said,
it's nothing personal.
It's just a matter of principal.
I'll tell you how
I'm registered.
The same as I've been
for the past 30 years.
The same as my father was.
You expect me to
follow a family tradition?
I suppose that would be immoral.
Well, it's not necessarily
immoral, but...
Would you kindly explain that?
Well, yes, I'll
try... Just a minute.
Listen, Papa. Listen
to your grandchild.
[doorbell rings]
I'll get it.
Oh, Daddy, it's just that I think
voting is more than a privilege.
I think it's a sacred trust.
Uh-huh.
Trick or treat.
Just a minute, honey.
And also, I believe that each
voter should make up his mind
according to the
issues of the campaign,
and according to the
merits of the candidates,
instead of just voting
for a straight party ticket.
Don't be ridiculous.
Daddy!
I voted the straight
party ticket all my life.
And so did your grandfather.
That's terrible.
Did you get that,
Papa? It's terrible.
You know what I mean.
Daddy, don't you do any reading?
Don't you listen
to all the speeches
each of the
candidates makes and...
don't you devour every
piece of information
you can get your hands on?
Occasionally, if I have time.
If you have time?
Well, Daddy, I'm sorry,
but I just think it's
the responsibility
of every American citizen.
Papa, listen to who's lecturing
us on American citizenship.
She's old enough to vote, so all
of a sudden she's Eric Sevareid.
Daddy, will you please
stop talking to Grandpa
and defend yourself.
Defend myself against what?
Against the charge that
you don't keep an open mind.
[doorbell rings]
I'll get it.
I do keep an open mind.
Trick or treat.
Weren't you here before?
Yes, sir.
Let's not be greedy.
It just so happens that my
open mind always coincides
with my straight party ticket.
[loud buzzing]
Ann, I know what you're doing.
You don't fool me for a second.
What am I doing, Daddy?
You're rejecting your heritage.
You're using this
election as an excuse
to tell me you don't
need me anymore.
And you put her up to it.
What did I do?
You changed her sense of values.
You took an innocent girl and
turned her into an anarchist.
Oh, Mr. Marie... For all I
know, she could be arrested
for the way she registered.
Oh, Mr. Marie, I...
All right, all right.
I'll waive my secret ballot
long enough to tell you
that I have registered
with the duly-authorized
and highly-respected
political party
of the United States of America.
We've got stickers and
buttons and everything.
Isn't that right, Don?
Absolutely right.
[Lou] Absolutely right, is it?
Under the circumstances,
I find it hypocritical
that you're willing to
accept my hospitality.
Daddy. You mean,
you want me to leave?
That's entirely up to you.
Daddy.
In that case, I'll leave.
Donald, just a minute.
Daddy, do you wish to apologize?
Yes, he does. No, I do not.
I see.
Well, in that case,
Donald, I'm going with you.
You know, you're
all being very silly.
Good-bye, Mother.
I certainly hope we see
each other again soon.
Now, see what you've done.
Look, do you really want to go?
As a daughter? No.
As an American citizen? Yes.
Short weekend, wasn't it? Very.
However, I want to
thank you for your loyalty.
My pleasure.
It wasn't anyone's pleasure.
And under the circumstances,
I hesitate to say this, honey,
but I think you take the
concept of the secret ballot
far too literally.
Was I a pain in the neck?
[chuckles] Not to me, no.
But to your father.
Well, he was
unfair. Yes, he was.
On the other hand...
What about the other hand?
So were you.
Donald, in what possible
and conceivable way
can you say that I
was being unfair?
Honey, many people
vote a straight party ticket.
It's perfectly legal.
Well, it isn't
voting intelligently.
That's your opinion.
But in a democracy,
a person can vote on
whatever basis he chooses.
Oh, piffle.
Ann... Now, look,
that is not piffle
and you know it.
Well, I may know
it, but I don't like it.
And why are you
sticking up for my father
after I stuck up for you?
Honey, I am not sticking
up for your father, not exactly.
Oh, yes you are.
And I thank you
for your disloyalty.
H-Honey.
Look, I-I'm sorry.
This is no time to discuss it.
One fight for today was enough.
Would you mind
stepping inside, sir?
Out of the prying eyes
of friends and neighbors.
I wouldn't mind at all.
Open the door. You have the key.
Oh, no. I forgot my purse.
In the car? Yes. No!
In my parents' living room.
Oh, Donald, why
didn't you notice?
I was busy being indignant.
You noticed when I
left it in my living room.
Uh, you're right. It's my fault.
Why don't we get a pass
key? Pass key won't help.
Why not? Well, I've got extra
locks on the door for protection.
Okay, we'll get a locksmith.
Well, what about my
money, my identification...
my eye shadow?
Donald, I can't exist
without my purse.
I see.
Okay. Back to Brewster.
Now? Well, it's about 9:00.
We can get your purse
and be back here by one.
Yeah, I'll share the driving.
In that case, we can
be back here by three.
[car pulls up]
[tires screech]
[car doors close]
[footsteps approach]
Oh, no! They're out!
Why so many lights?
To make the burglars
think they're in.
Oh, I bet they took a walk.
Daddy always likes to
take a walk when he's mad.
Okay, we'll sit on the
porch, and we'll wait for them.
No, I'd rather not.
I'll go through the window
and we can get my purse
and be out of here
before they get back.
Aren't the windows locked?
Well, they all are except this one.
The lock is broken on it.
I think if we can
just raise it up a little,
we can lift it
easily. All right.
Okay.
You got a pencil?
No, I got a pen. But I
don't have any paper.
That's okay.
Okay, now just put
your hands here.
And when I say
lift, lift. All right.
Ready? Ready. Lift.
Good. Oh, that's good.
Okay, lift.
What happened?
I broke your pen.
Why?
Because I remembered that
the window with the broken lock
was nailed shut until
Daddy had a chance to fix it.
Only I didn't remember
until I broke the pen.
Oh, well, now I understand.
What? Why you
didn't need any paper.
Right. Right.
Let's try the bedroom window.
I think we ought to wait. Oh,
Donald, don't be ridiculous.
As a great
philosopher once said,
one fight for today was enough.
Now, will you please
go and get the ladder
that's behind the garage?
I hope.
[Donald] Here we are. Oh, good.
Just put it up there against
my former bedroom window.
All right, now, wait a minute.
You better let me do it.
Oh, Donald, this is an old
ladder, and it's not very strong.
I'm a lot lighter. All
right. Well, be careful.
Ann, are you all right?
Yeah, I'm fine.
How's the ladder?
Well, it's broken
into kindling wood.
Can you climb down?
Of course I can climb down.
That's funny.
I did it all the time
when I was 12 years old.
Well, look. Maybe
I can reach you.
Ah, it's no use.
Donald, do something.
Well, like what? Like
find another ladder.
Where?
The fire department.
Okay, where is it?
It's, uh, two blocks that way,
then around the corner,
and, uh, two blocks that way.
And tell them Lou
Marie sent you.
He's an emergency
volunteer. Tell them that.
Ann? Yes, Donald. What is it?
Look, if I were to turn
and walk away from here,
never to return,
would you understand?
[chuckles] Yes, Donald.
[sighs]
Enjoying the night air?
I'm enjoying nothing.
It's your guilt.
You should call Don
and Ann and apologize.
What'll I say?
Say you're sorry
you lost your temper
and that after thinking it over,
you realized how deeply
you love both of them.
Him, too? Well, of course.
Say you know that they're
mature, responsible adults
and that in the future you'll respect
their rights as individuals, huh?
I've got a better idea.
You call. Oh, no, I...
[clears throat]
Good evening.
Just a minute.
What are you doing here?
Ann forgot her purse.
Where, up on the roof?
Where is Ann?
I'm up here.
[gasps] Wha...
Ann! Good evening.
I don't mean to be nosy, but
what are you doing in my tree?
I was trying to climb through
my former bedroom window
to get my purse.
When your old ladder broke,
and I landed in your tree.
So I sent Donald to
your fire department
to get another ladder.
That's logical. Uh, Mr. Marie,
would you please step asi...
Just a second.
Well, well, well.
Miss Independence
is stuck in a tree.
Move aside, please.
Miss "I'm from the Gallup poll.
I'd like to know your
position on urban renewal."
Lou, please. Or would you
rather not go out on a limb?
[laughs] Lou...
[pretends to laugh]
she'll catch pneumonia.
Okay, go ahead.
Okay, honey, be careful.
All right. Now, that, I enjoy.
Well, did you find the
iodine and bandages?
Yes, thank you.
[chuckles] Lou, your
daughter's in pain.
Well, one good pain
deserves another.
That's all right, Mother.
I suppose Daddy's right.
Why do you say that?
Well, as Donald
pointed out to me,
I've been taking this whole
thing a little too literally.
You pointed that out.
Yes, sir.
So I am now going to
tell you who I'm voting for.
Darling, you don't
have to do that.
But I want to, Mother.
I'm gonna vote for the same man,
whoever he is, that
Daddy votes for.
Ann, that's wrong.
It's un-American.
It's also very fishy.
But I want to, Mother.
I'm voting for the same man,
whoever he is, that
Daddy votes for.
Oh, no. Nothing doing.
If you vote for the
same man that I vote for
and the country goes
to ruin, you'll blame me.
Well, if you like,
I'll vote for the
other candidate.
Makes no difference to me.
Then if he wins and
the country goes to ruin,
you can blame her. [chuckles]
That's not very funny,
humorously speaking.
Well, like it or not, I'm
telling you right now
who I'm voting for.
I forbid you to tell me
who you're voting for.
Why?
You'd always resent me for it.
When you look back on
your first presidential election,
you'll always remember that it was
your father who spoiled it for you.
I would not.
Yes, you would.
Now that I think of it,
I remember raising
you to think for yourself.
Now that I think of
it, you certainly did.
So that's that, and I refuse
to hear another word about it.
Well, kids. Where
are your suitcases?
They're in the trunk of my car.
Why don't you bring them
inside, and we'll start over again.
Are we welcome here?
Always.
Donald, too?
Naturally. I never said
Donald wasn't welcome here.
Hmm.
Thank you, sir. I appreciate it.
We'll get our suitcases. After we
take back the fire department's ladder.
Oh, yeah. Come on.
Ann.
Yes, Donald. What is it?
You forgot something.
Ha ha, I've got my purse.
Ha ha, you forgot your pants.
Thank you, Mommy.
Oh, Donald, it was so wonderful.
Pulling that lever.
Not just voting, but knowing
that I was standing up
and being counted
as an American citizen.
That's really where
it's at, isn't it, Donald?
That's really
what it's all about.
It certainly is, and
I'm proud of you.
You kept your secret ballot
a secret right to the finish.
So did you.
But now that it's all over,
we can tell each
other who we voted for.
Ann? Well, it's all right, now.
And I can't tell you
how curious I've been.
Okay, I voted
for... Wait a minute.
What's the matter?
Suppose we didn't
vote for the same man?
So what?
Well, that would mean we
canceled out each other's vote.
It would be as if I really
hadn't voted at all, wouldn't it?
Well... more or less,
you could say that.
I don't want to know.
Let's not ever tell
each other, ever.
As long as we both shall live.
I think that's the
best way to handle it.
Don't you agree?
I agree.
[sighs]
It's wonderful living in a
democracy, isn't it, Donald?