That Girl (1966–1971): Season 3, Episode 16 - Dark on Top of Everything Else - full transcript
Donald tells Ann that if she wasn't in his life, he probably would have worked this weekend. As such, Ann does allow Donald to live his "without her" life, as she decides to head back to Brewster to visit with her parents for the weekend. But that plan doesn't come totally to fruition as Lew and Helen are heading into the city for the weekend for a convention. So Ann is left to her own devices at her parent's house. When she isn't fondly and not so fondly reminiscing about her growing up period in Brewster, Ann, who has too much alone time on her hands, hears every little proverbial bump in the night. Those bumps do cause Ann some grief, but probably not quite in the way she initially suspected.
[door buzzer]
Who is it?
[Donald] Steve McQueen.
Oh, Steve. Come
in and ravage me.
Hi.
You're not Steve McQueen.
Well, Steve said he's
gonna be a little late,
but that I should go ahead
and start ravaging you.
[squeaks] Stop it.
What's that? It's a puzzle.
I mean, who is it?
Millard Fillmore.
The former President?
Yeah. This company only makes
puzzles of former Presidents.
But, honey, why
get Millard Fillmore?
He's probably the
least famous of them all.
Well, all the other
Presidents were a dollar.
Millard Fillmore's 39 cents.
Oh.
Well. What would you like to do?
I'd like to find the rest of
President Fillmore's nose.
Assuming that
doesn't take all day,
what would you like to do
for the rest of the weekend?
I dunno. What do you wanna do?
Well, I wasn't thinking in
terms of what I wanna do.
I always think in terms
of what we wanna do.
Well, maybe if you thought in
terms of what you wanna do,
you'd get an idea quicker.
Well, if it was just me,
I guess I'd... I guess
I'd do some work.
Oh. Well, if... if that's
really what you wanna do,
Donald, maybe
that's a good idea.
I mean, I don't
want you to think
you have to spend
every weekend with me.
Honey, there's nothing wrong
if two people love each other
and spend a great deal of time
together wanna be alone once in a while.
No, no! Of course not!
If that's how you feel.
No, no. I was talking about you.
Oh.
Did Fillmore have a beard?
Here's a piece of chin
with some hair on it.
Honey, that's not a chin.
That's an upper lip.
That's a picture of Hitler.
You're kidding.
No wonder it was only 39 cents.
[chuckling]
You know, Donald,
maybe it's a real good thing
you have work you have to do.
I really should go to
Brewster and see my parents.
Are you sure?
That they wanna see me?
Certainly. I'm an only child.
No, no. That's not what I meant.
Well. Guess I'll
see ya on Monday.
Yeah. Yeah. I guess so.
Don't forget.
Forget? Me? Already
made a mental note.
Get together on Monday with...
What was her name again?
Oh, yeah, yeah. That girl.
♪♪ [theme]
[Lou] Helen, aren't
you ready yet?
I'm coming, Lou. Just a minute.
[Lou] Come on. Will
you please step on it?
I've got your coat. Yes, yes.
I turned off the gas, and
I locked the back door.
Good. Let's get going.
Okay. Thank you.
I don't wanna get caught
in that heavy traffic. No.
Hi. Ann.
What are you doing here?
[stammers] I mean,
you're not... w-well...
There isn't anything
wrong, is there?
Oh, Daddy. For heaven sakes.
No, I just thought I'd spend the
weekend home, that's all. Mmm, darling.
But we're just on
our way to New York!
Oh? Oh. I'm sorry.
I guess I should
have called first.
Why be sorry? You can turn
around drive back with us.
We're going to the Restaurant
Owners Convention and Workshop.
Your old man is on the program.
Oh! Really.
He's chairman of the
panel discussion on salads.
Come on. It'll be fun.
Just the three of us.
[half-laughs] No, thanks, Daddy.
[Helen] Is anything wrong?
Oh, no, no.
Now, look. Why don't
you stay in my apartment,
and I... I'll stay here.
I mean, you and Don usually
spend your weekends together.
Well, I... I just thought it
would be fun, you know,
to spend a night at home.
Maybe stay up in my room
and go through some of
my old things. You know.
[Lou] Good. You've been spending
too much time with that guy.
It isn't healthy! Lou.
Well, it's true. Why,
when we were their age...
When we were their age, we watched
the zeppelins land in New Jersey.
It's another world now.
All right. All right!
You're sure you don't
wanna come with us, Ann?
[Ann] Oh, no, thanks, Daddy.
You two go ahead
and have a good time.
Here's the key to my apartment.
Make yourselves at home.
Oh, and don't mind
the puzzle on the table.
It's either Millard
Fillmore or Adolph Hitler.
You're right, Helen.
It is another world.
All right. Let's go.
Darling? Uh, come back for
a real weekend with us soon.
And you can bring
Don. Thanks, Mom!
Bye.
Oh, knock 'em dead
on the salad panel...
The Brewster Rooster.
Oh, gosh.
"We, the graduating class of
Brewster High School, look to the future.
"For though we are
the students of today,
we are the leaders of tomorrow."
[chuckles]
The graduating class.
C, D, E, L, M... Marie.
"Ann Marie.
"Honor society, dramatic club,
class secretary, drum majorette.
She spins our hearts the
way she spins her baton."
[laughs]
"Spins her baton."
Let's see, here. [laughing]
Bom-bom bah bah-pah-pah-pah...
[thuds to floor]
I wonder if that's
what they meant by
"She spins our hearts the
way she spins her baton."
[panting]
I was a little younger
when I did that!
"To Ann. A-N-N.
"A... always there
when you need her.
"N... never lets you down.
"N... never forgets a friend.
Your friend, Nathan."
I don't remember any Nathan...
"Ann, if I live to be a hundred,
"I'll never forget what
you did to Steve Loomis.
Your best friend, Ethel Burns."
[laughing]
"If I live to be a hundred,
I'll never forget what
you did to Steve Loomis."
What did I do to Steve Loomis?
Hello, is this Steve Loomis?
The Steve Loomis who
went to Brewster high?
Steve, it's Ann Marie.
[phone disconnects]
Hello?
Hello?
Talk about holding a grudge.
"It's been neat being your
friend for these four years.
"Your friend, Cyndi Walker.
"P.S. I'll be your friend till
the ocean wears diapers
to keep its bottom dry."
Cyndi Walker.
"They say you never
forget your first love.
"I know I won't.
"Lover, Walter S. Wickhorst,
Drum Major,
Brewster High School."
Walter Wickhorst.
Let's see.
Whack, Whacker, Whackerhill, Wickerhoff,
Wick, Wicket, Wickhoff, Wickerhop,
Wickhitch, Wickhorst.
[dialing phone]
Hello? Walter?
Hi. It's Ann Marie.
[laughs]
Yeah, really.
How are you?
Oh, I'm fine, thank you.
Oh, well, I'm living
in New York City,
and, you know, working
on television and the stage.
You have?
Really?
Oh, well, that's
very flattering.
Well, I'm not really
what you call a real star.
Not yet, anyway.
What about you, Walter?
What are you doing now?
You're a drum major?
Oh, no, no. I wasn't startled.
I just never knew a
professional drum major before.
The St. Patrick's Day parade?
Say, you have made
a name for yourself.
Oh, sure, I think about
you sometimes, Walter.
See you?
Oh, well, sure. Maybe sometime.
Now?
Oh, oh, well,
gosh. I don't know.
I thought you were married.
You are.
Oh... Oh, no.
No hard feelings.
I mean, I certainly didn't
expect you to wait forever.
Well, no, Walter.
Maybe some other time.
Okay.
Bye, Walter.
[water dripping]
[rustling]
[rustling]
Hi, friends. Bernie Sterns speaking
to you from Bernie Sterns Motors,
home of Brewster's biggest
collection of used cars.
Tonight's feature
film is Night of Terror,
the grisly story of what
happens to a young girl
trapped by herself
in a deserted cave.
Close enough.
Let's see, now.
Night of Terror. No.
"Movie, 1943.
"Tap-dance Your Troubles Away.
"A girl from Central
America tries to break
"into show business
disguised as a banana.
Carmen Miranda
and Andy Russell."
Why can't I relax?
I miss Donald, that's
why I can't relax.
I don't know if Donald misses
me, that's why I can't relax.
[dialing phone]
Busy. She's still on the phone.
Well, you can phone
her in the morning.
Let's go to sleep.
She's been on
the phone all night.
Ah!
Does Ethel Burns
still live in Brewster?
I think so.
I bet she's talking
to Ethel Burns.
Remember how they used to
hang on the phone for hours?
She's probably talking to Don.
I hope she's talking
to Ethel Burns.
Oh, he hasn't been
in the office at all?
Okay, thank you.
[knocking]
[knocking]
[knocking]
[steps creaking]
[knocking]
[knocking]
[lock rattling]
Oh!
[window knocking]
If I can just get
up to that pipe.
I could swing my
legs to the window.
Oof.
Oh...
[grunting]
[phone ringing]
Oh... [grunting]
Helen.
Helen!
What is it now?
There's no answer.
Are you sure you
dialed the right number?
I've punched the same
buttons 27 times tonight.
Of course it's the right number.
Maybe she went to bed.
She was on the
phone ten minutes ago.
Well, then, what's wrong?
I don't know. How should I know?
I don't know!
But we'd better get
back to Brewster real fast!
[sighs]
[door closing]
[footsteps]
[Donald] Ann?
Donald?
Ann?
Donald, I'm down here!
[door rattling]
Hold the door open!
Ann! Oh...
Honey, what are
you doing in that bed?
Oh, Donald, it was just awful.
I was trying to get... ooh!
Out the window, and I...
couldn't move the trunk, and
the rocking chair didn't work,
and when I jumped
up to the pipe,
the bed folded up
and smashed me in it.
What are you doing here?
Well, I was just in
the neighborhood.
This time of night?
Morning.
Morning?
Well, honey, I couldn't work,
so I decided to take a drive.
To Brewster?
Well, I started to drive,
and before you
knew it, here I was.
I thought you didn't want
to see me this weekend.
Of course I wanted to see you.
Oh, Donald, you did not.
I could tell by your attitude.
You said you had work to do.
Honey, I have work to do every
weekend, but I still want to see you.
Why didn't you want to see me?
I did.
It's just that, well, we spend
every weekend together,
and I don't want you
to get bored with me.
[chuckles]
How could I get
bored with a girl
who buys Millard Fillmore
and brings home Adolph Hitler?
[laughs]
What the devil is going on here?
Daddy! Oh, hi, Mr. Marie.
Hello, mother. Mrs. Marie.
That's the bed my
mother used to sleep on.
Have I got a story to tell you.
I don't want to hear it.
We drove all the way from New York
because we were so worried about you.
Didn't you hear the phone?
Well, I was stuck in this bed.
Look, Mr. Marie...
Look? I've seen enough already.
Lou, calm down.
I want them to explain
this kind of messing around.
Well, there's a perfectly
simple explanation.
Of course there is.
It's like the time that my father
caught us in your rumble seat.
We were not messing around.
We were looking for
a crank to start the car.
That's just the point.
You mean they were down
here looking for a crank?
I doubt it, but anything
that looks this terrible
must have an
innocent explanation.
Now, of course.
You see, Daddy...
Never mind. We'll
talk about it upstairs.
After you've put
some clothes on.
[sighs]
Donald, we are in big trouble.
Why?
Daddy will never
believe the truth.
We're gonna have to make
up something pretty sexy.
So there she was, helpless.
Held prisoner by a
vicious folding bed.
Yeah, if it hadn't been for Donald, I
might never have been seen again.
Oh, honey, someone would have
come along and found you sooner or later.
Oh, Donald, you're too modest.
Well, a man does what he can.
They wouldn't have the
gall to make all this up.
Of course not. Now, come on.
We have to get back, or you'll
be late for your salad panel.
That's right.
Aren't you two
coming to New York?
We'll be right behind you.
Bye.
Somehow, I get the feeling
your father doesn't trust me.
Oh, Donald, now,
don't worry about it.
It's perfectly natural.
Grandpa never trusted him.
I mean, he caught him in
the rumble seat with mother.
I know. They were
looking for a crank.
There was no crank.
Daddy just made that story up
to get Mother in the rumble seat,
and he figures you're at least
as untrustworthy as he was.
Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA
Who is it?
[Donald] Steve McQueen.
Oh, Steve. Come
in and ravage me.
Hi.
You're not Steve McQueen.
Well, Steve said he's
gonna be a little late,
but that I should go ahead
and start ravaging you.
[squeaks] Stop it.
What's that? It's a puzzle.
I mean, who is it?
Millard Fillmore.
The former President?
Yeah. This company only makes
puzzles of former Presidents.
But, honey, why
get Millard Fillmore?
He's probably the
least famous of them all.
Well, all the other
Presidents were a dollar.
Millard Fillmore's 39 cents.
Oh.
Well. What would you like to do?
I'd like to find the rest of
President Fillmore's nose.
Assuming that
doesn't take all day,
what would you like to do
for the rest of the weekend?
I dunno. What do you wanna do?
Well, I wasn't thinking in
terms of what I wanna do.
I always think in terms
of what we wanna do.
Well, maybe if you thought in
terms of what you wanna do,
you'd get an idea quicker.
Well, if it was just me,
I guess I'd... I guess
I'd do some work.
Oh. Well, if... if that's
really what you wanna do,
Donald, maybe
that's a good idea.
I mean, I don't
want you to think
you have to spend
every weekend with me.
Honey, there's nothing wrong
if two people love each other
and spend a great deal of time
together wanna be alone once in a while.
No, no! Of course not!
If that's how you feel.
No, no. I was talking about you.
Oh.
Did Fillmore have a beard?
Here's a piece of chin
with some hair on it.
Honey, that's not a chin.
That's an upper lip.
That's a picture of Hitler.
You're kidding.
No wonder it was only 39 cents.
[chuckling]
You know, Donald,
maybe it's a real good thing
you have work you have to do.
I really should go to
Brewster and see my parents.
Are you sure?
That they wanna see me?
Certainly. I'm an only child.
No, no. That's not what I meant.
Well. Guess I'll
see ya on Monday.
Yeah. Yeah. I guess so.
Don't forget.
Forget? Me? Already
made a mental note.
Get together on Monday with...
What was her name again?
Oh, yeah, yeah. That girl.
♪♪ [theme]
[Lou] Helen, aren't
you ready yet?
I'm coming, Lou. Just a minute.
[Lou] Come on. Will
you please step on it?
I've got your coat. Yes, yes.
I turned off the gas, and
I locked the back door.
Good. Let's get going.
Okay. Thank you.
I don't wanna get caught
in that heavy traffic. No.
Hi. Ann.
What are you doing here?
[stammers] I mean,
you're not... w-well...
There isn't anything
wrong, is there?
Oh, Daddy. For heaven sakes.
No, I just thought I'd spend the
weekend home, that's all. Mmm, darling.
But we're just on
our way to New York!
Oh? Oh. I'm sorry.
I guess I should
have called first.
Why be sorry? You can turn
around drive back with us.
We're going to the Restaurant
Owners Convention and Workshop.
Your old man is on the program.
Oh! Really.
He's chairman of the
panel discussion on salads.
Come on. It'll be fun.
Just the three of us.
[half-laughs] No, thanks, Daddy.
[Helen] Is anything wrong?
Oh, no, no.
Now, look. Why don't
you stay in my apartment,
and I... I'll stay here.
I mean, you and Don usually
spend your weekends together.
Well, I... I just thought it
would be fun, you know,
to spend a night at home.
Maybe stay up in my room
and go through some of
my old things. You know.
[Lou] Good. You've been spending
too much time with that guy.
It isn't healthy! Lou.
Well, it's true. Why,
when we were their age...
When we were their age, we watched
the zeppelins land in New Jersey.
It's another world now.
All right. All right!
You're sure you don't
wanna come with us, Ann?
[Ann] Oh, no, thanks, Daddy.
You two go ahead
and have a good time.
Here's the key to my apartment.
Make yourselves at home.
Oh, and don't mind
the puzzle on the table.
It's either Millard
Fillmore or Adolph Hitler.
You're right, Helen.
It is another world.
All right. Let's go.
Darling? Uh, come back for
a real weekend with us soon.
And you can bring
Don. Thanks, Mom!
Bye.
Oh, knock 'em dead
on the salad panel...
The Brewster Rooster.
Oh, gosh.
"We, the graduating class of
Brewster High School, look to the future.
"For though we are
the students of today,
we are the leaders of tomorrow."
[chuckles]
The graduating class.
C, D, E, L, M... Marie.
"Ann Marie.
"Honor society, dramatic club,
class secretary, drum majorette.
She spins our hearts the
way she spins her baton."
[laughs]
"Spins her baton."
Let's see, here. [laughing]
Bom-bom bah bah-pah-pah-pah...
[thuds to floor]
I wonder if that's
what they meant by
"She spins our hearts the
way she spins her baton."
[panting]
I was a little younger
when I did that!
"To Ann. A-N-N.
"A... always there
when you need her.
"N... never lets you down.
"N... never forgets a friend.
Your friend, Nathan."
I don't remember any Nathan...
"Ann, if I live to be a hundred,
"I'll never forget what
you did to Steve Loomis.
Your best friend, Ethel Burns."
[laughing]
"If I live to be a hundred,
I'll never forget what
you did to Steve Loomis."
What did I do to Steve Loomis?
Hello, is this Steve Loomis?
The Steve Loomis who
went to Brewster high?
Steve, it's Ann Marie.
[phone disconnects]
Hello?
Hello?
Talk about holding a grudge.
"It's been neat being your
friend for these four years.
"Your friend, Cyndi Walker.
"P.S. I'll be your friend till
the ocean wears diapers
to keep its bottom dry."
Cyndi Walker.
"They say you never
forget your first love.
"I know I won't.
"Lover, Walter S. Wickhorst,
Drum Major,
Brewster High School."
Walter Wickhorst.
Let's see.
Whack, Whacker, Whackerhill, Wickerhoff,
Wick, Wicket, Wickhoff, Wickerhop,
Wickhitch, Wickhorst.
[dialing phone]
Hello? Walter?
Hi. It's Ann Marie.
[laughs]
Yeah, really.
How are you?
Oh, I'm fine, thank you.
Oh, well, I'm living
in New York City,
and, you know, working
on television and the stage.
You have?
Really?
Oh, well, that's
very flattering.
Well, I'm not really
what you call a real star.
Not yet, anyway.
What about you, Walter?
What are you doing now?
You're a drum major?
Oh, no, no. I wasn't startled.
I just never knew a
professional drum major before.
The St. Patrick's Day parade?
Say, you have made
a name for yourself.
Oh, sure, I think about
you sometimes, Walter.
See you?
Oh, well, sure. Maybe sometime.
Now?
Oh, oh, well,
gosh. I don't know.
I thought you were married.
You are.
Oh... Oh, no.
No hard feelings.
I mean, I certainly didn't
expect you to wait forever.
Well, no, Walter.
Maybe some other time.
Okay.
Bye, Walter.
[water dripping]
[rustling]
[rustling]
Hi, friends. Bernie Sterns speaking
to you from Bernie Sterns Motors,
home of Brewster's biggest
collection of used cars.
Tonight's feature
film is Night of Terror,
the grisly story of what
happens to a young girl
trapped by herself
in a deserted cave.
Close enough.
Let's see, now.
Night of Terror. No.
"Movie, 1943.
"Tap-dance Your Troubles Away.
"A girl from Central
America tries to break
"into show business
disguised as a banana.
Carmen Miranda
and Andy Russell."
Why can't I relax?
I miss Donald, that's
why I can't relax.
I don't know if Donald misses
me, that's why I can't relax.
[dialing phone]
Busy. She's still on the phone.
Well, you can phone
her in the morning.
Let's go to sleep.
She's been on
the phone all night.
Ah!
Does Ethel Burns
still live in Brewster?
I think so.
I bet she's talking
to Ethel Burns.
Remember how they used to
hang on the phone for hours?
She's probably talking to Don.
I hope she's talking
to Ethel Burns.
Oh, he hasn't been
in the office at all?
Okay, thank you.
[knocking]
[knocking]
[knocking]
[steps creaking]
[knocking]
[knocking]
[lock rattling]
Oh!
[window knocking]
If I can just get
up to that pipe.
I could swing my
legs to the window.
Oof.
Oh...
[grunting]
[phone ringing]
Oh... [grunting]
Helen.
Helen!
What is it now?
There's no answer.
Are you sure you
dialed the right number?
I've punched the same
buttons 27 times tonight.
Of course it's the right number.
Maybe she went to bed.
She was on the
phone ten minutes ago.
Well, then, what's wrong?
I don't know. How should I know?
I don't know!
But we'd better get
back to Brewster real fast!
[sighs]
[door closing]
[footsteps]
[Donald] Ann?
Donald?
Ann?
Donald, I'm down here!
[door rattling]
Hold the door open!
Ann! Oh...
Honey, what are
you doing in that bed?
Oh, Donald, it was just awful.
I was trying to get... ooh!
Out the window, and I...
couldn't move the trunk, and
the rocking chair didn't work,
and when I jumped
up to the pipe,
the bed folded up
and smashed me in it.
What are you doing here?
Well, I was just in
the neighborhood.
This time of night?
Morning.
Morning?
Well, honey, I couldn't work,
so I decided to take a drive.
To Brewster?
Well, I started to drive,
and before you
knew it, here I was.
I thought you didn't want
to see me this weekend.
Of course I wanted to see you.
Oh, Donald, you did not.
I could tell by your attitude.
You said you had work to do.
Honey, I have work to do every
weekend, but I still want to see you.
Why didn't you want to see me?
I did.
It's just that, well, we spend
every weekend together,
and I don't want you
to get bored with me.
[chuckles]
How could I get
bored with a girl
who buys Millard Fillmore
and brings home Adolph Hitler?
[laughs]
What the devil is going on here?
Daddy! Oh, hi, Mr. Marie.
Hello, mother. Mrs. Marie.
That's the bed my
mother used to sleep on.
Have I got a story to tell you.
I don't want to hear it.
We drove all the way from New York
because we were so worried about you.
Didn't you hear the phone?
Well, I was stuck in this bed.
Look, Mr. Marie...
Look? I've seen enough already.
Lou, calm down.
I want them to explain
this kind of messing around.
Well, there's a perfectly
simple explanation.
Of course there is.
It's like the time that my father
caught us in your rumble seat.
We were not messing around.
We were looking for
a crank to start the car.
That's just the point.
You mean they were down
here looking for a crank?
I doubt it, but anything
that looks this terrible
must have an
innocent explanation.
Now, of course.
You see, Daddy...
Never mind. We'll
talk about it upstairs.
After you've put
some clothes on.
[sighs]
Donald, we are in big trouble.
Why?
Daddy will never
believe the truth.
We're gonna have to make
up something pretty sexy.
So there she was, helpless.
Held prisoner by a
vicious folding bed.
Yeah, if it hadn't been for Donald, I
might never have been seen again.
Oh, honey, someone would have
come along and found you sooner or later.
Oh, Donald, you're too modest.
Well, a man does what he can.
They wouldn't have the
gall to make all this up.
Of course not. Now, come on.
We have to get back, or you'll
be late for your salad panel.
That's right.
Aren't you two
coming to New York?
We'll be right behind you.
Bye.
Somehow, I get the feeling
your father doesn't trust me.
Oh, Donald, now,
don't worry about it.
It's perfectly natural.
Grandpa never trusted him.
I mean, he caught him in
the rumble seat with mother.
I know. They were
looking for a crank.
There was no crank.
Daddy just made that story up
to get Mother in the rumble seat,
and he figures you're at least
as untrustworthy as he was.
Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA