That Girl (1966–1971): Season 2, Episode 11 - Thanksgiving Comes But Once a Year, Hopefully - full transcript

Ma. Mom. Mother.

Mother, listen.

You know I'd like to
spend Thanksgiving

with you and Dad,
but I just can't take

time off from work right now.

Oh, you can fly to St. Louis

in a couple of hours.

I don't want you to
spend Thanksgiving alone.

Mother, I won't be alone.

I'm having dinner with Ann.

Perfectly strange girl.



Well, I can't entirely
disagree with that.

We don't want to
spoil your plans,

but, well, do you want
to bring Ann along?

To St. Louis?

That's not a bad idea.

I'd rather have you both
than lose you altogether.

We'll look forward
to seeing you... both.

Good-bye, darling.

Good-bye, mother.

Harold?

Donald is up to something.

Why would he want to bring Ann

all the way home to St. Louis

for Thanksgiving dinner?



Because you asked him too.

Ann who?

Oh, he knew I didn't mean it.

Harold, he's planning
to propose to her.

Well, good.

I want my son to have
every chance I never had.

Ann who?

Ann Marie.

We met her in New
York last summer.

Oh, yeah. That girl.

♪♪

Just a minute.

Hello, sweetheart.

Oh, hi, Daddy.

What's that?

Oh, I'm measuring a bookcase.

What for? Short stories?

Here's your laundry.

Oh, Daddy, don't you think

this is getting a
little ridiculous?

What's ridiculous about it?

You wash, your mother irons.

It's an equitable arrangement.

Yes, but I'm perfectly capable

of ironing my own blouses.

You should see the way
your mother's eyes shine

when she thinks you can't iron.

You don't know how hard it is

to get enough
blouses dirty each week

to keep mother's eyes shining.

Besides, I get to deliver them.

My eyes shine, too.

See?

Also gives you a chance
to check up on me,

doesn't it?

I'm not ashamed to admit it.

See you Thursday.

Thursday? Laundry
day is Tuesday.

And Thursday is Thanksgiving.

We're expecting you for dinner.

Oh, Daddy,

I... I guess I should
have told you before,

but, well, this is my first
Thanksgiving in my own apartment

and I thought I'd take a
crack at a turkey myself.

But you've always spent
Thanksgiving at home

with me, your mother,

and a goose with
oyster stuffing.

Well, Donald's coming
over for dinner this year,

and he likes turkey.

That's not the point.

Holidays should be
spent with your family.

Well, Donald's family, sort of.

Not our family.

You're splitting hairs.

I'm being specific.

Don is not related to us.

Well, if you want
to get technical,

you and mother aren't
blood relatives either.

I beg your pardon.

I mean, technically,
I'm the only one

who's really related
to both of you.

Maybe that's why we
both want you with us.

Well, Don feels the same way,

and his eyes have a right

to shine once in a while, too.

Okay. Bring him
home with you then.

Well, that's not exactly
what we had in mind.

Exactly what did
you have in mind?

Maybe we ought to discuss that.

Well... forget it, Daddy.

I just talked myself
into your way.

Here's a little eye
shine for Mother.

You know, I spend half
my life waiting for you.

Okay, okay, I'm ready.

Don't get excited.

And the other half
saying, "Who's excited?"

Where do you
want to have dinner?

I wanted to ask you about...

You first.

No, ladies before gentlemen.

My parents want you to have

Thanksgiving dinner with us.

My parents want you to have

Thanksgiving dinner with us.

I asked you first.

Only because I was polite.

And you should politely accept

my parents' invitation.

Well, I just thought
you might like

to see my parents for a change.

Your parents live all
the way in St. Louis.

Correct.

I can't go all the
way to St. Louis.

Yeah, but you can't get
to my parents if you don't.

Besides, I was planning on
spending the day with you.

So was I.

But we shouldn't
hurt their feelings.

Of course not.

I mean, after all,
they are our parents.

Yeah, but we do
have lives of our own.

That's true.

I mean, it's time we
showed a little independence.

"We"?

I send my shirts to a laundry.

Donald, I've got an idea

that'll make everybody happy.

I'm listening.

You can have dinner
with your parents,

and I can have dinner with mine.

Honey, that's not a solution.

That's a capitulation.

Not if we all have dinner here.

But, Donald, we've
never met them.

I don't care how
much we'll like them.

Your mother's
eyes are not shining.

I'm sorry, Mom, but
how do you figure

by my asking you
to come to New York

that I'm rejecting you?

They're not perfect
strangers, Daddy.

We all had dinner
together last summer.

Ann who?

But, Ann, we've always had

just the family on Thanksgiving.

But can't you think of
Ann as one of the family?

He's trying to
tell us something.

I'm only trying to work it out

so we'll all be together.

She says we'll all be together.

Sounds very permanent to me.

Well, if she wants to be
with her parents so much,

why doesn't she bring
them to St. Louis?

She says it'll prove to us

how independent she is.

New York is far enough,
but, Lou, St. Louis.

Mother, Ann wants
to do this on her own.

I don't think she'll want

your recipe for
chestnut stuffing.

Mother, I really want
to do this on my own.

I don't want Daddy's
recipe for oyster stuffing.

Well, I was only trying to help.

The biggest help you can give

is by just being there.

And not offering any advice.

Please, Daddy, it's important.

Well, if it'll make
you happy, Donald.

I knew it.

We'll never get him back.

They always go
with the girl's parents.

If it's what you want,
Ann, we'll go along.

Oh, Helen, please stop that.

Then I'll see you next Thursday.

About noon.

Mother, please, if I
decide I want oysters,

I'll dig them up myself.

"One dozen eggs,
one loaf of bread..."

Come in.

"Parsley, raisins..."

Hi, honey. Hi, Donald.

Look at this.

What's that?

Just got it in the
mail from Mother.

Well, what is it?

Just a thoughtful gesture.

Silverware.

Been in the family for years.

We always use it on holidays.

Your mother's silverware.
My father's oyster stuffing.

Oh, you're kidding.

It arrived in the
mail this morning.

I guess you can't blame them.

They each have their traditions.

I want to start
my own traditions.

Now, it's not gonna hurt to
give in a little on each side.

I'll give in and I'll
wind up cooking

two completely different
Thanksgiving dinners.

Well, just throw in a little
something for everybody.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

Daddy would love a
sweet-potato casserole.

Is there anything special
your parents always have?

Um, mashed potatoes with
mushroom gravy for my father.

Minced pie for my mother.

And for me...

There's no room
in the oven for you.

Mm.

Let's see.

One minced pie, one
sweet potato casserole,

one turkey,

baked prune and
broccoli pudding...

Baked prune and
broccoli pudding?

I love it.

Now, come on.

Let's see if everything
will fit into the oven.

One mincemeat pie.

One mincemeat pie.

One sweet potato casserole.

Okay.

Honey, they fit perfectly.

What about one raw turkey?

Something goes off the menu.

I'd rather die than
make the choice.

Honey, suppose each person

gives up one thing.

Then we'll be left
with bread and butter.

Oh, Donald, I know!

We can use the
Bauman's kitchen next door.

Ruth left me the key.

She and Jerry went to Buffalo

to have dinner with his family.

We can put the
turkey in Ruth's oven

and everything else in here.

That's what I'll do.

Come in.

Honey, I got to tell you,

I'm really proud of the
way you've organized

your first Thanksgiving dinner.

Thank you, Donald.

Hi. Hi.

Oh, don't tell me I forgot to
put a stamp on my gas bill again.

No, I got a special
delivery for you.

Oh.

And I can't say I'm
unhappy to deliver it.

Oh, it's from my mother.

"Dearest Ann, hope you are well

"and hope your goose
is marinating properly.

"Love, Mother.

P.S. Here's a little
something for your pot."

Just a minute.

There are some things you just
can't send through the U.S. mail.

Wait a minute. What is it?

Marjoram. You're under arrest.

Wait a minute.

I don't think you understand.

Marjoram is a spice,
like salt and pepper.

Aw, come on.

Why would anyone
take the trouble

to send salt and
pepper through the mail?

Because she
couldn't get the soup

to stay in the envelope.

Come in.

Hi.

Hi, Daddy.

I thought you might
be the mailman

with some boiling water.

Well, you know your mother.

She's not at all like you.

I'll admit I didn't
like the idea

of spending Thanksgiving here,

but you know I
wouldn't interfere

once you made up your mind.

I know.

No matter what my...
personal feelings might be.

Looking for something?

Oh, nothing. Nothing.

Nothing at all.

Where's the goose?

What goose?

Ann, your father's an old man.

You wouldn't forget the goose.

I'm just kidding.

"H"?

What hotel did this come from?

It belongs to Mrs. Hollinger.

Who?

Donald's mother.

She sent you her silverware?

I only have five forks.

You reject your
own father's recipe,

but you'll eat with a
strange woman's silverware?

Daddy, it's really
not the same thing.

May I please have my laundry?

This isn't your laundry.

It's something else.

I just happen to
have it with me.

For instance?

Your mother's best
tablecloth and napkin.

This is trying to help.

This is showing off.

Oh!

It is us, your Pilgrim parents.

I know. Hi.

I believe we were expected.

But not so soon.

I mean, won't you come in?

I've got to go next door
and baste the turkey.

Well, can I help, dear?

That's all right, Mother.

Make yourselves
comfortable. I'll be right back.

Who's are those?

"H."

Why do those people
monogram everything?

Are they afraid she'll
steal something?

I guess they just want her

to get used to her new initial.

Ann Hollinger.

Who's ridiculous
idea was it anyway

to change the girl's name
when she gets married?

Mince pie.

Right.

Mince pie.

And let's see. Ah.

"Before placing pie
in the moderate oven,

cut slits in pie crust."

All right, cut
slits in pie crust.

Ugly plates.

Those are Ann's.

Oh, I should have
♪ lent her my China.

No, no, no, the plates
are just the right touch,

shows she knows
how to economize.

Naughty, naughty.

Thought I smelled
something burning.

Really?

What are you cooking?

It sure smells good!

What does it smell like?

Pine cones.

Right. It's room spray.

It hides cooking
odors... and curiosity.

Where is everybody?

The Hollingers are on
their way over from the hotel

and Donald had to work.

On Thanksgiving?

That boy's
completely unreliable.

He'll be here as soon as he can.

Hello, Mrs. Hollinger,
Mr. Hollinger.

Hello, Ann.

So nice to see you again.

Well, merry Thanksgiving!

I hope you didn't
have too much trouble

finding my building.

Oh, no, no. Not at all.

It stands out like a sore thumb.

Now, I'd like you
to meet my parents.

Mr. and Mrs. Marie,
Mr. and Mrs. Hollinger.

How do you do?

How are you? Hello.

How are you? How do you do?

It's nice to see
you. It's a pleasure.

Well, why don't we
all get comfortable?

Oh, may I?

Well, thank you. Thank you.

May I take your
wrap, Mrs. Hollinger?

Maybe I'd better leave it
on. It seems a bit drafty.

Oh, well, I could
turn the heat up.

It's too hot already.

I could turn the heat down.

Oh, no, no, not at all.

Perfectly comfortable, dear.

Oh, well, why don't you
all get better acquainted?

I have to go next
door for a minute.

Excuse me.

What's next door?

The oven.

Don's apartment
has its own kitchen.

What does he need it for?

It seems like he eats
here most of the time.

I hope your trip was
not too unpleasant.

Oh, no, no, not at all.

It was lovely.

Long, but lovely.

Of course, I don't have
too much faith in airplanes.

Actually, you're a
lot safer in a plane

than you are on the highways.

I flew one all through the
war and never got a scratch.

Well, I wouldn't
know about that.

I was in the infantry.

Did all the dirty work
while you glamour boys

got all the publicity.

Well, you can over
dramatize a little dirt, you know.

Did you ever slop through mud

with a 50-pound
pack on your back?

I was in ten major operations.

And came through
without a scratch, I'll bet.

I had dysentery.

Would anybody like a drink?

I'd love one! I don't drink!

Well, I'll just put
out a few things

and then you can decide.

Well, uh, isn't it nice that
we have this opportunity

to meet each other?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Our children seem
to get along well.

They certainly seem to.

I don't suppose Don
has told you a great deal

about himself, has he?

No, why? Has he
got something to hide?

On the contrary, Mr. Marie.

My son is inclined
to be overly modest.

He's a nice boy.

Don was first in
his journalism class

at the university and
student body president.

Varsity track, ROTC,
honor society...

Oh, St. Louis expected a
great deal from that boy.

Well, Ann isn't exactly a
sack of doorknobs, you know.

Brewster College hasn't been
the same since she graduated.

Well, you can
certainly see that.

I'll be serving dinner just
as soon as Donald gets here.

Well, anything I can do?

No, thank you, Mrs. Hollinger.
Everything's under control.

Now, if you'll just
all help yourselves.

I'll be right back.

I suppose you were both
sorry to see Ann leave Brewster

and come to the big city, huh?

No, not at all.

Most Broadway stars
keep a little flat in town.

It's very chic.

What line of business
are you in up there?

I own my own
restaurant. And you?

I own my own hardware store.

Oh, nuts and bolts, eh?

Does anybody want anything?

No, thank you. Can
I help? No, Mother.

Just a few squirts across
the hall and I'll be right back.

She's a marvelous cook.
Prepares really exciting meals.

Wait until you taste a
goose with oyster stuffing.

She's not having turkey
with chestnut stuffing?

We always have
goose on Thanksgiving.

You're supposed to have
turkey on Thanksgiving.

Who says so?

Any American will tell you that.

Oysters? Oysters in the turkey?

Oysters in the goose!

Everything all right, dear?

Oh, yes. Fine, fine.

Just moving along real fine.

Sage! Sage in the goose!

Sage in the turkey,
oyster in the goose.

If anybody wants
anything, just say so.

What's the matter, dear?

Did you lose something?

The key to Ruth's
apartment. I can't get in.

Have any idea where you left it?

I'm not sure, but I think
I left it in her kitchen

the last time I was over there.

Get a spare from the super.

He went to Brooklyn to
have dinner with his sister.

I'll look in my other purse.

You got a lock pick
or a door jimmy?

I don't think so.

What would a decent,
wholesome girl be doing

with a lock pick
and a door jimmy?

It was just a thought. Yeah.

Daddy, I can't find it. My
turkey's going to burn up.

Ha, did you hear that?

Her turkey's going to burn up!

You didn't cook a goose?

I cooked a goose. The goose
is in here, the turkey's in there.

Well, why didn't
you put it in here?

She can cook a goose
any place she wants.

What difference does
it make? It'll be ashes!

Don't worry about the
door, Ann. I'll take care of it.

An old infantry trick.

If there's any taking care
of to be done around here,

the air force will do it!

Daddy, would you please
hurry? I can smell smoke.

Stand back. I'll put
the shoulder to it.

You'll never open it that way.

I can go up on the roof and
come down the fire escape.

I can get in through
the kitchen window.

Be careful, Daddy!
I'd better go with you.

Now, Harold,
watch your bursitis.

Look, I've busted open
better doors than this

with half the effort.

Can you get it any higher?

No, Daddy, I'm
trying. Here, hold this.

Oh, it's stuck. It won't
go up any higher.

How's your shoulder?

Oh, great, great. Just
a little dizzy, that's all.

Hold it! Hold it!

I'm holding it
as tight as I can.

Not the window, my back!

Oh, Harold, don't you
think you've had enough?

If we'd had that
attitude in '44,

Hitler would be in
St. Louis right now.

Daddy's foot's stuck
in the fire escape!

I'd better call the
fire department!

I see what you mean when you
say Ann prepares an exciting meal.

Excuse me.

Mother?

Oh, Donald!

Oh, I'm so glad you're here.

It been awful. Just awful!

Oh, it was just...
Just awful, really.

What happened?

Ann locked the turkey in
the Baumans' apartment.

And it started burning
and the firemen came,

and it was awful... just awful.

Calm down, Mother. Where
are Mr. and Mrs. Marie?

The firemen are bringing
him down from the roof.

Easy, fellows, easy.

You'll be lying down
in a minute, Daddy.

It was the day over
Berlin. Ruptured two discs.

I tell you the Luftwaffe knew
they were in a scrap that day.

My father told me all about it.

Honey, it was great.

Oh, thank you.

Yes, considering all the
trials and tribulations you had,

you did very well, my dear.

Oh, thank you, Mrs. Hollinger.

Would anybody care
for anything else?

Oh, couldn't possibly. Thanks
so much. Oh, no, no, thanks.

Daddy, would you like
another slice of goose?

No thanks, dear.
My slice was plenty.

Well, there's still plenty of
broccoli and prune pudding left.

Well, we can certainly
be thankful for that.

We can be thankful
it wasn't burnt.

It's a very unusual dish.

Personally, I'm
grateful we're all alive,

and I couldn't eat another bite.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have
an announcement to make.

Due to the fact that the pumpkin
pie was burned with the turkey

and the mince pie was washed
out of the window by the firemen,

and all I have
left in the kitchen

is half a jar of peanut butter,
some marshmallow topping,

and a can of anchovy paste,

I have an announcement for
which we can all be truly thankful.

There will be no dessert.

What did I tell you?

Didn't they turn out to be
pretty nice-type people, huh?

Was I right? I
never said a thing.

Donald didn't say one
word about getting married

or engaged or anything.

Oh, I know.

Oh, Harold, I'm... I'm so happy!

Are... are you sure
you're all right, sir?

Fine, fine.

I'll be okay as soon as
these muscle spasms relax.

Well, I-I'm sure
sorry, Mr. Marie.

Well, war is no joke.

Well, we're all set.

Good night, Ann, and thank you.

Wonderful dinner.

Don't you want Donald to
drive you back to the hotel?

Oh no, no. Don't bother.

We'll be fine.

Right to the
hotel, right to bed!

Uh, Mr. Marie, I don't think you
ought to be driving with that back.

Why don't you let me...

Oh, no. That... that
won't be necessary.

We'll be home in no time.

Certainly. I'll have
no problem driving.

Well, are you sure?

Oh, no, no. We'll
see you all again.

Come on, Lou.

Right, Helen. We've
got a long way to go.

Well, let's get rolling.

Oh, wait a minute.

I've got a better idea.

Why don't we all go
out and eat together?

Closed-Captioned By J.R.
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