That Girl (1966–1971): Season 1, Episode 24 - A Tenor's Loving Care - full transcript

Hey, where do you think... oh.

Oh, hey, Coop, what did we miss?

An hour's wait, that's for sure.

You haven't seen him? No.

But we certainly heard him.

♪♪

Oh, Donald, isn't
that marvelous?

Did you get any pictures?

No, nobody got his pictures.

One of the Times boys tried,

and that clown
had him thrown off.



Who does he think he is?

Oh, well, maybe he thinks he's
the world's greatest opera singer.

'Cause he is.

What's with this kid?

Well, she digs opera.

Oh, that makes one of her.

♪♪

Oh, Donald, I can't believe it.

That's actually Giuseppe
Cassenetti. Not necessarily.

It could be the
'abandon ship' alarm.

Well, I'm not leaving
this ship until I see him.

Maybe you better
enlist in the Italian Navy.

Why, what's the matter?

Mr. Wonderful there



doesn't wanna talk to reporters.

Oh, honey, look, we better go.

This is gonna turn
out to be a big nothing.

Oh, Donald, please.

Let's not leave until we
just catch a glimpse of him.

But you heard what
he... Oh, please, Donald.

Honey, you heard what he said.

Hey, what do you
say there Giuseppe?

Let's go.

Silencio!

Listen to me!

I want to talk to
just one reporter.

Ahh...

Quella Ragazza.

♪♪

Donald, did he mean me?

He sure did.

Yeah, yeah, Brenda Starr,
he pointed right at you.

Look, Miss, you're new here.

Uh, we'll be expecting you
to share your notes with us.

Oh, I will. I will.

I'll be happy to.

What notes? Your
notes from the interview.

Uh, relax, fellas, we'll share
anything we get with you.

Where did you
get that "we" stuff?

He said just one reporter.

And every reporter is entitled
to just one photographer.

I don't know anything
about reporting.

And I don't know
anything about opera.

We'll make a great team.

What will I ask him?

Just remember to ask about
who, what, when, where and how.

I'll coach you.

Who, what, when, where and how.

Ah.

How do you do?

Thank you for coming.

You go away, eh?

Oh, uh, now wait a minute.

Oh, please, don't send him away.

You see, Señor Cassenetti,

there's been a slight
misunderstanding.

I know there has been
a misunderstanding

because as I said before,

I want to talk just only to you.

Oh, oh, well, you see,

couldn't he stay because
he's my photographer?

I don't like photographer.

W-What's the matter with him?

U-Us. Paparazzi.

Oh, Señor Cassenetti,

I can't tell you what
a thrill this is for me.

Well, I understand.

I have been a fan of your
singing for years and years.

Ah, you know, I said to myself,

"Giuseppe, this girl
she love the opera."

I can see it.

And that's why I pick you.

Him.

I made rule.

If a reporter is stupid,

and he doesn't know
anything about opera,

no interview.

Now, what do you wanna ask me?

Uh, well... Who, what,
when, where and how.

How are you feeling?

I feel just fine.

Uh, excuse me, excuse me.

Uh, can I ask a question? No.

Oh, oh, go ahead.

Let him ask just one,
Señor Cassenetti.

Giuseppe, huh?

Giuseppe.

Uh, Giuseppe...
Señor Cassenetti.

Señor Cassenetti.

Um, how does it feel to be the
world's most famous baritone?

I wouldn't know.

Because, you see,
I happen to be...

a tenor!

Come on, you wanna ask
me some more questions.

Well, uh, how...

Huh?

Uh, what do you think of the
new Metropolitan Opera House?

Oh, well, I have not yet
sing there, so I can't tell.

What do you think?
Is worthy of me?

Oh! Well, it costs
$60 million dollars.

Is worthy of me.

Avanti.

This is champagne.

Next question. Yes.

Uh, the next question.
What do you think

of the current crop
of American singers?

Crop?

Crop is for fruit pickers.

Cassenetti is an artiste!

Next question.

Yes, well, the, the
next question is...

Ahhhh!

It's cold! It's ice cold!

Uh, what, what's
wrong with that?

Cassenetti never
drink anything ice cold!

Even champagne.

It ruin the throat.

Temperatura della camera.

You know what I mean?

Room temperatura.

Ah. Ahh!

Excuse me, Signorina,

what were you asking me?

It was about artistic
temperamnent.

I think you gotta go now
because it's time to rest the throat.

You know what I mean.
Oh, what about the interview?

Please, eh?

Signorina... you come
back here tonight.

And I give you
exclusive, All right?

All right, I see you later.

You, goodbye forever.

Uh, now, what do you mean? I
should come back to the boat tonight?

Yes, of course, because you see,

during my engagement
in your country,

I remain here on the boat.

Oh. Oh, that's an interesting
point for your story, Ann.

Oh.

How come you're
gonna be on the boat?

Is it because of your throat?

Because of my stomach.

You see, it needs special care,

and these are my
people on this boat.

They cook for me very good.

You come back
tonight, exclusive for you.

Oh, Donald, isn't that exciting?

You're gonna get an exclusive.

Not him. You.

Ciao, carina.

Ciao.

Hi ya, Tommy. Stealing
paper clips again?

No, paper.

Oh, hi, Ann. Hi.

Hey, you look like the cat
who just follow the canary.

Almost. I'm the cat who
just interviewed the canary.

So, you got an interview
with the canary, right?

No, Giuseppe Cassenetti,
King of the Tenors.

I heard he wasn't
giving interviews.

To the reporters, no.

To their girlfriends, yes.

I'm getting an exclusive.

Thanks to Ann.
Hey, that's great!

Mr. Hamlin will be so
thrilled he'd kiss you.

Well, I'd rather
he give me a raise

and kiss Ann.

Congratulations,
Don. Thanks, buddy.

When you're up there,
head of Newsview,

just remember the poor
people who helped you out,

encouraged you

and stole your typewriter paper.

You know, honey,

this maybe the break
I was looking for.

And it comes from opera,
something I know nothing about.

I guess that's where I come in.

You know I never
thought I'd be happy

because another
man fell for my girl.

Oh, Donald, will you stop it?

But he didn't fall for me.

He just likes me
because I'm a fan.

I don't mean anything to him.

You'll see when
we go back there.

You're not going. I don't
want you anywhere near him.

You have to take me.

I'm the reporter, and you're the
dumb photographer, remember?

Yeah, but I'm not that dumb.

I may not know about opera,

but I know about
this Cassenetti.

He's a big ladies' man.

Oh, Donald, that's ridiculous.

If he was a big ladies' man,
what would he see in me?

I don't know.

Donald.

Okay, okay.

The point I was
trying to make is

I'm just not his type.

Well, just the same, I don't
wanna take any chances.

I am gonna go alone.

You don't know
anything about opera.

Honey, I am a reporter.

I know how to get an interview.

But just to make sure, you
better give me a fast rundown.

Opera's a big subject.

Well, all I want is
enough to fake it.

All I have to do is sound expert
enough to pacify Cassenetti.

All right, what's he opening in?

Rigaletto.

Okay.

Give me a quick rundown
on him and that opera.

Quick rundown.

Well, Cassenetti is a tenor.

Yeah. Yeah, I heard about that.

Well, the tenors of an
opera are usually the heroes,

because their voices are
so sweet, and high, and clear.

Yeah, yeah, they sound
like choirboys, right?

Right.

Now, the tenor in Rigaletto

is a cruel, licentious nobleman,

who betrays this
innocent, young girl,

and then he abandons her.

That doesn't sound
like a choirboy.

What about the music?

Well, let's see
now. There's, uh...

♪ La donna e mobile ♪

♪ Rut-tut-tut-tur-ru-rut ♪

A-And the quartet?

Right. The quartet
from Rigaletto, right?

Right, yes.

What's a quartet about?

Well, in the last act,

the tenor makes
love to the contralto.

Wait a minute, is that,
is that the fat lady?

Usually.

Donald, have you
ever seen an opera?

Of course, I've seen an opera.

I went to The Marriage
of Figaro once.

But I missed the reception.

This isn't gonna work.

I'm gonna have to go with you.

Now, let's not start that again.

I am going alone
and that's final.

Oh, well, okay, go alone.

But if you run into any trouble,

you better use the old dodge

from my Music
Appreciation course.

Now, no matter what
opera he mentions,

you just smile and say,

"Oh, yes, one
of Verdi's finest."

Well, Verdi didn't
write them all, did he?

Well, most of the Italian ones.

And the ones Verdi
didn't write, Puccini did.

So, if you goof
up, just say, um,

"What's the matter with
me? I meant Puccini."

Hey, perfect, honey. Perfect.

Verdi or Puccini, right?

Right. Right.

Hey, what's wrong with
The Marriage of Figaro?

Mozart.

♪♪

Hi. Goodbye.

Oh, oh, wait, wait, wait.

I didn't want to see you. Where
is the beautiful, young girl?

Well, she couldn't make it.
I'm gonna cover the story.

No, no, no, I don't talk
to no stupid reporter,

who know nothing about opera.

Well, wait, wait a minute.
Just, just wait a minute.

♪ La donna e mobile ♪

♪ Dum-dum-dum-dum-du-dum ♪

What do you want from me?

An ovation?

That was from Rigoletto.

Really? Oh, I'm certain of it.

Oh.

So, the beautiful, young girl,

she can't come back, eh?

Uh, well, no, no.

But I can handle the interview.

So, you are now
the lover of opera.

Oh, well, well, I don't, uh,

I don't claim to be an expert.

Like Valpolicella.

Well, one of Verdi's finest.

Uh... Oh, w-what's
the matter with me?

Valpolicella, well,
isn't that Puccini?

It happens to be... the wine.

Wine.

Try it.

Thank you. Thank you.

Salute.

Oh, you don't like?

No, no, very interesting.

Hot wine.

Temperature of the room.

Well, it's a very hot room.

It's so Cassenetti don't
catch the cold in the throat.

You know what
happens, don't you,

when Cassenetti
catch a cold, eh?

Well, I-I can imagine.

But, uh, too warm
is no good, either.

Oh, you're a doctor, eh?

Well, no, no.

No. no. You singer?

Well, I... What are
you? I will tell you.

You are a nothing!

You have here in this throat
worth millions of dollars.

You gotta take care of it.

It's my voice. Don't
tell me nothing about it!

What did you do?

Well, I'm sorry. I'm
sorry, it was an accident.

What did you do?

Well, I-I, I'll turn it off.

You turned on the machine?

Well, I'm sorry. Press
that other button there!

Well, uh, sorry it's stuck.

Press the other
one! I, I don't think...

Get out of the way!

You broke the
machine. I'm sorry.

Assassin. You tried to
ruin the voice of Cassenetti!

Get out of here,
you crazy American!

It's not safe to be with you.

Well, you did it. You...

Uh, Mr. Cassenetti...
Get out of here...

If you could stay calm here...

Now, maybe some other time?

Shut up!

As long as I'm here, if I could
ask you just a few questions.

Don't say no more.

Get out. Send back that girl.

That's all I want to know.

Well, howdid it go?

I escaped with my life
and a perforated eardrum.

What happened?

I accidentally turned
on the air conditioner

and blew the entire interview.

Oh, it's terrible.

And I lost the story,
that's not so terrible.

No, it's what I did that
makes it so terrible.

What did you do?
Oh, it's terrible.

Okay, what did you do?

I was just trying to be helpful.

Uh-um. I told Mr. Hamlin

that you were getting an
exclusive with Cassenetti.

That's terrible. See, see.

And, what's even worse,
he was so impressed,

he canceled what was going on the music
page and was saving room for your story.

Which I don't have.

Don, he's waiting for your call.

Well, better not
keep him waiting.

I meant well.

Yeah, so did Benedict Arnold.

Uh, Mr. Hamlin, please.

Don Hollinger.

Uh, Mr. Hamlin?

Oh, thank you. Thank you, sir.

But let's not be premature.

Well, yeah. Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

I know you're holding
open the music page.

Yeah, well...

Well, all I can
promise is I'll tr...

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

I'll be sure to get it.

Yeah, right. Goodbye.

What did he say?

Nothing I care to repeat.

Did the words, uh, "you're
fired" creep in anywhere?

Oh, yeah, yeah,
quite a few times.

I'm sorry.

No, it's not your fault.

Boy, and to think I could've
had that story like that.

If I'd only taken Ann along,
he'd have talked to her.

Well, then, uh...
Don't... Don't say it.

Don't say it. It's unthinkable.

What is?

Using my girl as
bait for a story.

It's funny you should
have thought of it.

Okay, so I've thought
of it, but I'll never do it.

If it were my girl and
my job were at stake...

She's not your girl
and it's not your job.

I don't care what happens.

I will not embarrass my girl
for the sake of an interview.

♪♪

Just a minute.

Hi, Donald. Hi.

Well, you certainly don't
have a song in your heart.

Well, if I did, it wouldn't
be from an opera.

Are you still
brooding about that?

So you lost an exclusive,
it's all part of your job.

Job?

Yeah, I had one of those once.

Oh, Donald, Mr. Hamlin didn't.

No, no. But he told me,
"No interview, no job."

And so far, no interview.

He wouldn't.

Well, he couldn't.
Try, he shouldn't.

That's all the leeway
I'm allowing myself.

Donald, you get back to
Cassenetti and try again.

You're not the kind
of man who quits.

No, no. I'm the kind
of man who gets fired.

There's still a way of
getting that interview.

How?

Send me?

I couldn't do that, Ann. No.

No, I couldn't do that.

Donald, I admit. I'm not
too crazy about going.

I know, I know.

Well, maybe, we
ought to discuss it.

Now, there's no
point in discussing it.

Well, okay.

But if you wanna
discuss it, let's discuss it.

Donald Hollinger.

You were planning on sending
me all along, weren't you?

No such thing. Where
did you get that idea?

It's written all over your face.

You have just been standing
there, waiting to bring it up.

No, that's not true. I've
been standing there,

waiting for you to bring it
up. There's a difference.

That's true.

Honey, look, will you do it?

Before, you said there was no
story in the world worth risking me for.

Story, no. Job, yes.

Listen, maybe, I did
exaggerate his interest in you.

Maybe he is harmless.

Well, it's supposed
to be his voice.

They say it makes women melt.

Yeah. Yeah, they
melt because he keeps

the thermostat at
around 85 degrees.

Hey, wait listen, honey.
There's nothing to worry about.

I'll be right there with you.

You will? Sure.

Sure, and if by chance
he did make a pass at you,

well, I'd give him a shot in his

Okay, I'll do it.

What's his number?

Here.

You see, I'm willing to give
the guy the benefit of the doubt.

I mean, maybe he just
has a fatherly interest in you.

Yeah, I sure
hope that's all it is.

Señor Cassenetti, please.

Guiseppe?

Ann Marie, the reporter.

Oh, yes, I'm sorry about that.

But Guiseppe, Do you think I
could still have the interview?

Tonight?

Oh, oh, thank you.

Oh, Donald, he's singing to me.

It's the love song
from Madame Butterfly.

Um, does it sound fatherly?

Let's tell I'm not
the reporter, you are.

Listen, honey, he's mad
enough at me as it is.

I know, but the tape recorder.

This recorder will save you.

You won't have
to take any notes.

Now, put it in your purse.

It just doesn't seem right.

It's perfectly respectable.

Reporters do it all the time.

Now, in case I get
thrown out at there...

Thrown out?

Donald, don't you dare
leave me in there alone.

I said just in case.

That recorder will
come in very handy.

Now, come on please.

Come in.

Oh, please. No, no,
no, wait. Listen to me.

You're friend outside,
what's his name?

Mr. Hollinger. I think there's
something wrong with his head.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
See, don't worry about him.

Come with me, over here.

Sit down.

Now, quietly, we are
alone together and now,

we're going to have
a nice little talk. Huh?

When did they stop
making key holes?

Now, what do you
wanna ask me, huh?

How about letting
go of my hands?

Oh.

Can I help you, sir?

Oh, no, no, thanks. I'm fine.

Thank you very much.

You're waiting to see Señor
Cassenetti? Yeah, well, sort of.

But I don't wanna let
him know I'm out here.

Oh. Yeah.

You see, I want the
shots to be candid.

They're always so
much better that way.

Momentino. I
mean, you wait here.

One moment. Don't
move, Señorita. Yeah.

All right.

Señor Cassenetti...
Giuseppe, Giuseppe, eh?

Señor Cassenetti.

Now, I'd like to ask you,
what is your favorite opera?

No, I don't want to.

Wait, you were saying?

What is your favorite opera?

Well, let me see, now,
what is your favorite opera?

La Bohéme. La Bohéme.

Well, then, that is
my favorite opera.

I know what to tell you.
There is a lovely scene

in La Bohéme where
Rodolfo make love to Mimi.

He take her little cold hands
in his and he sing to her...

Don't sing. Don't sing.

You could tell it.

You're a photographer, huh?

Uh, well, I, I fool
around a little, yes.

The wife's been after me to have

some pictures taken.
Would you mind?

No. No, I'd be glad to.

Now, you sit right
there in that chair

and answer my questions
or I'm gonna leave.

All right, All right,
interview, interview.

Every night before I go to bed,

I have a glass of hot milk with a
little honey in it for the vocal chords.

Now, you have your answer, eh?

Oh, yes.

My, you certainly take
good care of your voice.

Of course.

Because the voice
is a special thing.

Special, like you,
Cara mia, special.

Giuseppe, I'm very
flattered by your attention...

Naturally, naturally.

But you don't wanna
get too serious.

But I do, Cara mia.

I want to get serious.
That's what I want.

Now, Giuseppe, stop it.

But I can't, I can't.

Belleza, because from
the first moment I see you,

you are like a
fever in my blood.

I can't think of nobody but you.

I need you. I want
you. I adore you.

You'll see, by tomorrow,
you'll forget all about me.

I know.

Listen, I'm really
not a photographer.

I was beginning
to get that feeling.

Giuseppe, please,
just leave me alone.

Don't you like
Giuseppe just a little bit?

Oh, yes, a whole bit.

It's just that there's
someone else.

Oh, please, darling.

Don't talk about
my wife, will you?

Your wife? She's
4,000 miles from here.

Why don't we go
talk to the captain?

No, Wait a minute.

I am a legitimate reporter.

Here, now, look at this. Look.

I'm trying to get an
interview with Cassenetti.

There, right there.

From out here?

Well, it isn't easy.

Let's go.

If you don't let go of
me, I'm gonna scream.

Brava. Good. Scream.

I scream too.

We have it your way, huh?

You know that the early Verdi's has
been compared with the late Rossini?

Oh, yes. But the critics say Verdi
never consciously copied Rossini.

Do you agree with that
opinion? And if not, why not?

This is not time to compare
nobody with nobody else.

This is time for love.

But I only came
for an interview.

Yes, and you are here
at room temperature.

Listen, there's something
I have to tell you,

I lied to you. I'm
not a reporter.

Good. Then, we don't have to
worry about interview no more, eh?

I have something
terrible to tell you.

What, darling?

I have a cold.

What?

You're... I don't believe you.

It's terrible. It's
a terrible cold.

Don't breathe. Don't move.

Don't do anything. Don't speak.

You have to go.

Do you understand? Go on. Go on.

Out. Out.

How do you say
"gesundheit" in Italian?

Goodbye.

Fine, Mr. Hamlin.

He said he'll talk to me just
as soon as he's over his cold.

Yes, sir. You just keep
that Music Page open.

All right, thank you. Bye bye.

Honey, it's too much.

He not only believed
you had a cold,

he believes he
caught it from you.

See what the power
of belief can do?

Yeah. Yeah, but what
I still don't understand

is why did he get so nice
to me all of a sudden?

I'm getting the
interview plus pictures.

Plus, tickets to all of
his performances here.

Yeah. Yeah, how come?

I, as well, don't understand it.

All I did was call
him up on the phone

and just mentioned that I had a
tape recorder going all the time

that he was chasing
me around the room.

And just like that, he
offers me all of these tickets.

Uh uh. There's a word for that.

Freebies?

Blackmail.

Oh, Donald, I figured as long
as he was being generous,

he might as well be generous to
you, too, and give you the story.

Shame on you.

Holding your tape
recorder over a guy's head.

A recording we've
already erased.

I know that.

And you know that.

But does he know that.

♪♪