That Girl (1966–1971): Season 1, Episode 11 - What's in a Name? - full transcript

This episode is a revised version of the test pilot, with different characters and actors. Ann's agent, Harvey Peck, thinks that she should change her name to something more appropriate for an actress, as people are constantly asking him "'Ann Marie' what?" Ann does not like the idea, knowing how much it would upset her parents. As she predicted, Ann's father is furious with the idea, and will not speak to her unless her name is 'Ann Marie'. Ann has to decide soon - she has a part on a television show and needs to choose what name will appear for her in the credits.

Mr. Kelly? Hi. Harvey Peck.

Hi. Listen, uh, I was wondering
if you made a decision yet

on the girl for the
part of the teller.

Yeah. Well, uh, the girl
I sent over, Ann Marie.

She's... Huh?

No, no, no. Marie's
her last name.

Ann Marie. Yeah.

Well, uh, I think it'd be a
very smart move, Mr. Kelly.

Well, she's very much in
demand. She's new but she's hot.

Oh, yeah. People all over
town are asking for her.

Boy, where's my waitress?



That girl.

♪♪

Well, what can
I do for you, sir?

How is the turkey hash?

Oh, it's delicious.

I had it yesterday.

Thanks. I'll take a roast beef
on rye and a cup of coffee.

Good thinking.

Hello? Is it for me?

Are you expecting
two crates of tomatoes?

Yeah, okay.

If you'd like, I can
take these out,

so you can stay and
answer the phone.

Oh, come on, Charlie.
You know this is important.



Important? You know
what's important?

Fresh tuna salad, crisp lettuce,

oatmeal without
lumps. That's important.

You know, getting a
part's important to me.

Somewhere, somewhere, there's gotta
be an actress that wants to be a waitress.

I think I'll call him.

Why don't you call him?

He doesn't like me to call him.

He gets angry when
I call him. I better not.

Because if there's anything
important, he'll call me.

He's my agent. I have a
perfect right to call him.

He's gonna be angry anyway,
so I might as well call him.

Hello, Mr. Peck,
please. I'll hold.

Listen, I hate to do
this, but there are

some nice people who
would like to eat their lunch.

Jimmy, will you please
hold this for me? Yeah, sure.

Thank you. And tell him when
he gets on that I'll be right back.

And tell him not to be angry.

There you are. Roast beef
sandwich and tuna salad.

Oh, Miss?

Yes, sir?

May we have some
mustard, please? Mustard.

There you are, sir. Uh, Miss...

Oh, that's not my table.
Well, that's my mustard.

Are you through with
the mustard? Not quite.

Oh, when you are, would
you mind giving it back to him?

Thanks. He'll
give it back to you.

He hung up. He was
mad? No, he was busy.

He said, the second
you're done, get over there.

Oh, that means I got the part.

But why didn't he say so?

Because I didn't get the part.

What time is it? What
time is it, Charlie?

You'll be out of here
in 30 more hamburgers.

Oh, Charlie, make them all rare.

There you are, and
thank you very much.

Annie, don't we get dessert?

Oh, uh, Jimmy...
Go ahead. I'll bring it.

Annie, hope you get the part.

Thanks.

Hmm, come in. Mm.

Well, what is it?

Mm, ham and cheese.

Oh, Harvey, did I
get the part or didn't I?

Hmm, want some
malt? Good for you.

Make you a big star.

I got it! I got it!
I got that part!

Oh, Harvey, you're the best
agent in the whole wide world.

I did get it, didn't
I? You got it.

They said, "Tell Ann Marie
what's-her-name she's got the part."

Is that what they said?

Oh, Harvey, a real part.

That means, somebody's gonna
actually pay me for doing what I love.

That'll be like stealing.

For that part, it'll
be petty larceny.

Ahem, uh, Annie...

Annie?

What's wrong?

Well, uh... uh, my boss says...

and I agree with him.

W-w-what? About what?

About changing your name.

Change my name?

We discussed that.

No, we discussed discussing it,

but we never
really discussed it.

Well, I don't wanna discuss it.

Well, I do. Ann Marie is a
very bad professional name.

It sounds incomplete, like
you don't have a last name.

Nine out of ten people
say, Ann Marie what?

Nobody knows your last name.

One out of ten people does.

Ann, don't be funny when
I'm trying to be serious.

Well, Harvey, I, I just
don't wanna talk about it.

But why?

My father would cry.

Cry? Your father cries?

Yes, he's a very sensitive man.

Every time he hits me, he cries.

Listen, I gotta
represent you, hon,

and you got a rotten
name for representing.

I just got a job, didn't I?

Only because I
happen to be a genius.

You know how many
times I had to tell the guy,

"Marie is her last name".
He thought I was a recording.

Oh, Harvey, my parents
would not understand.

Boy, you sure know
how to ruin a day.

Hey, lady...

I'm the guy who got you
your first real acting job.

I know, but then, before I
even had a chance to celebrate,

you brought up this
whole name business.

Well, it's gonna be on television
for the first time this week.

It should be the name
you're gonna use.

You mean I have
to decide right now?

Well, yeah, that's why we're talking so
much when I could be finishing my lunch.

I don't even know
how to think of a name.

Well, easy. Uh, the phone book.

That's how I got my name.

You changed your name?

Well, I, uh, I had to,
for professional reasons.

No kidding.

What was it before?

Grace Kelly.

No, it's true. I used to call up
people and say I was Grace Kelly.

And they'd say, "The
actor or the agent?"

It was very confusing.
Will you come on.

No. Grace had the same problem.

That's why she ran off to
Europe and married Price Bernie.

See? It isn't so terrible.

Will you at least
think about it?

Okay, I'll think about it.

Listen, I'm gonna buy a bottle of
champagne and have a celebration.

You wanna come over tonight?

I'd love to, but
I'll be working.

Aw. Did I thank you enough
for getting me the part?

No, but you don't
have to. Just act good.

Now, get out of here
so I can finish my lunch.

Okay, bye.

And thanks, Grace.

There you are, sir, $1.90.

That only leaves
10 cents for your tip.

Wish it would be more,
but that wipes me out. Sorry.

Sorry? Instead of champagne,
you should've bought cream soda.

I guess not everybody cares.

Uh, sorry.

Mr. Cochran, when I left
here this morning, what was I?

Ten minutes late.

Right. So I left a
waitress and I return...

A drunk.

No, an actress. I got a part.

Congratulations.
What time's the party?

7 o'clock. And if you
come, bring your own glass.

Boy that looks good.

We better drink it fast
before the bubbles disappear.

Oh, no, the bubbles
last for hours.

Not if you're 98 above.

Don, you make the toast. Okay.

Sweetheart... No, not a love
toast, a show-business toast.

I'll make it. I'll save
the love toast till later.

Now, this may have been
said before, but well, here goes.

To Ann Marie, may your
name be in lights forever.

That's been said before.

Thank you.

Hmm. Great. Great.

Listen, about my name. Do you
think it's a good name for an actress?

What do you mean? Well, my
agent thinks I should change it.

Oh, a stage name.

Like Cary Grant is really
Archibald Leach. He is?

Sure. You ought to read some of those
magazines you have in your waiting room.

Wait, wait a minute, Judy. Ann,
you wanna change your name?

Well, I can see the
advantage to it sometimes

and my agent says
it's very important.

Well, honey, I don't see anything
wrong with having a stage name.

Well, I don't either, but I'm
really thinking about my parents.

Oh, they have to
change their name, too?

It's just that my father takes great
pride in the family, and he won't like it.

- Why, did you ask him?
- I'm almost afraid to.

Well, listen. Before you do, I suggest
you pick the name you're gonna use.

Why? He may
surprise you and like it.

I doubt that.

Come on, let's think of
a name now. It'll be fun.

Yeah, I have to think up names
for my patients all the time.

How about, uh, Melody?

Melody? Melody what?

Oh, gee, I never have
to think up a last name.

The mothers always
come in with those.

Well, the first name
may be enough.

Cause when I tell my
father what I have in mind,

my last name may be mud.

Melody Mud. It's nice.

Filipina.

How did those Hollywood
actors and actresses

come up with all
those famous names?

How about Balfida Barra?

Well, that hasn't been
used in a long time.

You wouldn't think
it'd be this hard.

I haven't even come up
with any good first names yet.

Ben Casey.

There was a nurse
on the Ben Casey show

with a great name.
Now, what was it?

Wait a second. I think I got
it. If you do, I'll give you a kiss.

All right, then pucker up.
It's not only a great name,

but it's one your
father may like.

What is it? Okay,
now, listen to this.

Marie Brewster.

Marie Brewster.

Well, it's not bad, but
it's hardly worth a kiss.

And why would
her father like it?

Why would my father like it?

Well, because you come from
Brewster and your last name is Marie.

Right. So we'll use my
last name as my first name

and the name of my hometown
as my last name. Right.

Now, that's clever.

Marie Brewster. I like it.

And I think you might
be right about my father.

Okay. How about my kiss?

Right after I call
home and try it out.

W-w-wait a minute. Under the
circumstances, could I have it in advance?

You're gonna call
your father now?

Not on your life.
It's his lodge night.

I'm gonna call my mother
first and try it out on her.

Okay, I'll wait for the kiss.

Hello, Mom? Ann.

Uh, is Daddy home?

Oh, that's right. I forgot.

Um, um, Mom... Oh,
no, nothing special.

Well, there is one thing.

I'm coming up Saturday.

Right. Listen, Mom, wait.

Uh, what do you think of
the name Marie Brewster?

Please, sir, I told you before.

We don't allow
strange men upstairs.

I'm not a strange man.

I'm a father.

Boy, one more and I'll
need a bigger apartment.

You really have got to
learn to pass up a sale.

Come in, but watch it.

I'm watching.

Daddy.

Good, you remembered.

Uh, Daddy, this
is my friend, Judy.

Hi, Mr. Marie. We've talked
on the phone, remember?

Yes. It's a pleasure.

Thank you.

Uh, you know,
Judy's from next door.

She's married to
Leon. The obstetrician.

He's a doctor.

Good. All obstetricians
should be doctors.

Oh. Well, I guess I'd better go

and give my obste-doctor

husband, uh,
breakfast, uh, lunch.

Uh, it was really nice
meeting you, Mr. Marie.

Again, a pleasure.

Well, Daddy, come on in.

How? That's funny.

You know, Mom said,
"Never store sweaters dirty."

I'll just... Don't bother.

I have only one sentence.

Oh, Pop, come on in.

I'll make you something.
You must be hungry.

How could I be hungry? Since
midnight, I've been eating my heart out.

Daddy, will you come on in? I can
say what I have to say right here.

Short and sweet.

I don't want you to
change your name, period.

Sure, Daddy. I understand.

And just come in
and we'll discuss it.

There is nothing to discuss.

Ooh, that's a heck of a...

Look, Daddy. Father, I
am not a child anymore.

We had that discussion
when you picked

yourself up and left
home, Ms. Independence.

Could you at least
hear the name?

It's still ringing in my ears.

You see, I used our last
name for my first name and the

name of our hometown
for my last name.

I like your last name
as your last name

and your first name
as your first name.

And the town can
take care of itself.

Daddy, I love my real name.

It's just not a very good
name for an actress.

We didn't name an actress,
we named a daughter.

Wait a second.

What's the name
of your restaurant?

Why, are you planning
to change that, too?

You don't call it Lou Marie's.
No, you call it The Parisienne.

Why? Because The Parisienne is a
better name for a French restaurant.

So? So? Marie Brewster's
a better name for an actress.

See? It's really the same
thing with me and the restaurant.

A restaurant does not have a
father, or a mother who cried all night.

Oh, Daddy, you're
not being fair.

Fair? I'm not fair?

Will you, will you...
Wait a second.

Not fair?

Will you let me fix you
a cup of coffee? Why?

Well, it's nice to discuss
things over a cup of coffee.

Right, but we're not
discussing anything.

You mean, you're just gonna
stand there and be stubborn?

Wrong. I'm going home.

No, Daddy, wait a
minute. Now, wait.

I just wanna talk about this.

What's your name?

What do you mean? To Marie
Brewster, I have nothing to talk about.

With Ann Marie, I'll be
a talking encyclopedia.

You mean, if I don't do what
you say, you won't talk to me?

What's your name?

It's, it-it's...

Now, Daddy, you
really mean that?

What's your name?

Marie Brewster!

Oh, Daddy!

Daddy!

Please, please give me a chance.

Come on, up with your hands.

All right, cut, cut.

All right, that's fine.
Lunch, one hour, huh?

Hey, Dave, I'd like to talk to
you about a couple of things.

It's very good.

Hey, can I buy you lunch,
Ms. Brewster? Hi. Uh, hi.

To tell you the truth, I'm
too stage-frightened to eat.

Now, don't you worry.

You're gonna be a smash.

What did you tell them at the
restaurant so they'd let you off?

Oh, I did the wildest
thing. I told them the truth.

It's always the best thing.

How long can you stay away?

Forever. They fired me.

Huh, like I said, the truth
is always the best thing.

Come on.

Boy, this is some big break.

In one shot, I lost
a job and a father.

Well, look, are you still
going up on Saturday?

Oh, yeah, my mom's expecting me.

Well, suppose I
drive you up there?

Well, why on earth would you
want to let yourself in for that?

Well, I-I actually started this name
business, and maybe I can talk to him.

Besides, you're
kind of a special girl.

You're kind of a special guy.

Daddy. Daddy.

Hi. Daddy, you
remember Don Hollinger?

Hello. What's her name?

Oh, Daddy, would
you please listen?

Well, do you still
wanna talk to him?

Look, you go see your
mom, I'll give it another try.

Okay, but don't
stand in front of him.

He might not stop.

Mr. Marie Mr. Marie, please.

Mr. Marie, can I just... Mr. Marie, uh,
could you turn that down for a second?

Okay, it's down. Thank you, sir.

I stopped to tell you we have
nothing to talk about. But we do, sir.

Wrong. You don't know her well
enough to ask me for her hand.

The weather is terrific.

Football, I hate.

It's too early for
baseball and yes,

I think there are
people on Mars.

Mr. Marie, Ann...

That I don't wanna talk
about, Mr. Hollingshead.

Oh, no. No, no, no.

That's Hollinger.

Sorry. Well, that's all right.

Everybody makes that mistake.

So why don't you
change your name?

Don's a very nice
young man, isn't he?

Yes, he is. But I don't
wanna talk about him, Mom.

I wanna talk about me.

Oh, you are between
you and your father.

I'm just, uh, an
innocent victim.

Can't I talk to
anybody in this family?

Have some lemonade,
huh. Thank you.

Look, Mom. You and Daddy raised
me well enough to know that I wouldn't

intentionally do anything to hurt
you or him or anybody for that matter.

We also raised you well enough to
want everybody to know we raised you.

Everybody knows
you raised me. Oh?

You think people would know that
Mr. and Mrs. Marie were the parents of, uh,

Marie Brewster or whoever?

Look, Mom.

There is something
more important than

just a name involved here. What?

Well, we all decided that I was old enough
to live alone and make my own decisions.

Ann, even the
President asks for advice.

Well, so do I. I
would like advice.

But he gives orders and he
makes ultimatums, he shouts.

When you think someone's getting
too far away to hear, you shout.

Well?

What do you think of the
name Hollinger Toledo?

You see, Ann, I come from Toledo, and we
could use my last name for my first name.

Boy, he's rough.

Hello?

Hi, it's me. How
did the taping go?

Oh, fine. Are you coming
over to watch the show tonight?

N-no. Look, I'm sorry, I can't.

I have to work, but I'll
catch it here at the office.

Oh. Some debut.

No parents, no you.

They're not coming? No. My
mother said, "You know your father."

Well, I know him, all right.

Well, Ann, look. You did what
was right, and I'm proud of you.

Oh, just a minute.
Someone's at the door.

For the star.

Oh, how beautiful.

Thank you, Max.

I'll see you later.

Don, you are so sweet. Thanks.

Oh, they're just
beautiful, the flowers.

Oh, I'm not so sweet.

I didn't send them.

Who was sweet?

Oh, listen.

Blood is thicker than name.

Though you're not
forgiven, you're not forgotten.

And it's signed, "Your father."

The armistice.

No, just a truce.

They're addressed to
apartment 2-C, no names.

Ann, listen.

Why don't you call them?

No.

You know, I think this really
ought to be done in person.

"Ms. Independence" is gonna
go home and watch the show.

Can I use your car?

Well, be totally independent
and take the train.

I'm using my car.

Bye.

Bye.

Not your fault. It's this town.

And that's why I'm leaving.

Oh, they have such problems.

And we're one big,
happy family. What's that?

I said, we have problems, too.
No, I thought I heard something.

Ann darling. Mom.

Lou, look who's here.

Oh, what's her name?

Thank you for the
flowers, Daddy.

You're welcome for the flowers.

It's such a pleasant surprise.

Well, I didn't wanna watch
my debut all by myself.

See? Well, um, what
about something to eat?

Daddy made some tarts.

Raspberry.

In honor of the occasion.

Wait a moment. It's
just about to start.

Oh?

If we find him,
the jury will decide.

So?

She told you she's on later.

It's a small part, but
very important to the plot.

You better hurry. This
thing needs something.

Hands up, everybody.

This is a stickup.

Okay, keep moving.

When I sneezed before,
is that when she was on?

She told you she's on later.

When, on the
eleven o'clock news?

Oh, there it is!

Look, look. Take a
look at the woman.

Okay, everybody,
down on the floor.

There she is.

Do as you're told,
or you're dead.

Please.

Uh.

You get killed?

Yeah.

And that's all you're on?

Do they at least
show your funeral?

Daddy.

That's all she's on.

Well, I said it
was a small part.

Oh, wait. It's over.

I know, but now
they'll roll the credits.

They'll show your name? Sure.

That thrill I can live
without. Daddy, please.

For please, please. and
bang, bang, all this aggravation.

- Well, where are you?
- At the end, at the end.

That's your name.

Ann Marie.

Lou?

Ann Marie?

That's me. They made a mistake?

No, they didn't, Pop, but I
almost did. Why didn't you tell us?

Why should a girl have to tell
anyone she's using her own name?

Get some coffee.

Why, uh, why did you do that?

Why did you send the flowers?

Oh, Pop.

I wanted to change my name
to help me, not to hurt you.

But then I realized it was hurting you
so much more than it could ever help me.

You were very good in that part.

It was little, but
you were very good.

You really think I was good?

Much better than that Marie
Brewster would have been.

Uh huh. Uh huh. That's great.

Yes, she'll be
delighted to hear it.

W-well, I'm expecting
her at any moment.

I'll tell her. Fine.

Thank you. Bye.

Oh. Hello? Hello?

Oh, gosh, he hung up.

Who was it? It was about you.

You're kidding. You
got me another part?

No, I got your job
back at the restaurant.

Too late. I'm starting at
Macy's in the morning.

♪♪