Terriers (2010): Season 1, Episode 6 - Ring-A-Ding-Ding - full transcript

Previously on Terriers:

ROBERT: I need you to do this.

HANK: Do what exactly?

ROBERT: Steal a quarter of
a million dollars from me.

BRITT: Bearer bonds.

JOSEPHINE: Here's your cut.

HANK: This is my sister Steph.

Why'd you leave St. John's?

I thought you liked it there.

STEPH: I got tired of the ward.

All the people there are crazy.



HANK: You're getting married again?

GRETCHEN: Yeah.

Jason, this is Hank Dolworth.

Hank, Jason Adler.

JASON: Sorry about that.

BRITT: I'm so sorry.

Excuse me. My fault.

The guy was buying a tuxedo.

There's his wallet.

What's Maggie want
with this guy, anyway?

HANK: Background check stuff.

BRITT: Now you're running a
background check on her new new dude?

HANK: She met him six
months ago on the Internet.

I'm just trying to make sure
she does the right thing.



JASON: Someone keeps screwing with
my credit and I don't know how.

HANK: I'll look into it.

Hey, Gretch.

GRETCHEN: Yeah?

HANK: I still love you.

GRETCHEN: I don't know what
I'm supposed to do with that.

HANK: I don't either.

In local news,
late real eastate developer

and accused murderer
Robert Lindus

was layed to rest today

in a funeral service
attended only by immediate family.

This once prominent's citizen
rapid fall from grace

has rocked the quiet
Ocean Beach community

(sniffs)

BRITT: Hey, sorry we're late.

We, uh, we had car trouble.

BRITT: What'd we miss?

HANK: Not much, not much.

They got into a huge fight.

She called off the wedding.

She said I was the one
she always loved.

Jason burst into tears, and
I just stood there aloof.

BRITT: Aloof's a good choice.

STEPH: That didn't really happen.

We just got here.

KATIE: Steph, you look beautiful.

STEPH: Gretchen lent me this dress.

I'm Hank's pity date.

But we're not sleeping together.

BRITT: Hey.

KATIE: Is that him?

You know, he's nothing--
not much to look at.

JASON: Hey, so glad you made it.

HANK: Jason, hey, good to see you.

Yeah. Oh, this is my
partner Britt Pollack.

Jason Adler.

This is Katie Nichols his girlfriend.

You remember my sister Steph.

JASON: Of course.

KATIE: Amazing party.

JASON: Oh, thanks.

Britt, have we-- have we met before?

BRITT: No, I don't think so.

STEPH: Societal norms baffle me.

I mean, you feel this need
to formally announce your

engagement to the world, and yet
I assume you already put your

penis in her.

JASON: Bar's over there.

BRITT: Dude totally recognized me.

HANK: Don't be paranoid.

He thinks whoever used his credit cards
got the numbers off the Internet.

BRITT: Wait, except we
didn't use his cards.

You had me lift his wallet so you
could do a background check.

HANK: Yeah, yeah.

Oh, and he was clean.

BRITT: You used his cards?

HANK: Man, you put his
wallet back, remember?

I mean, I used his numbers.

BRITT: On what?

HANK: Forget it.

It's fine.

In fact, he asked me to
look into it for him.

BRITT: Are we getting paid?

HANK: It's a wedding gift.

BRITT: Oh, you're a giver.

HANK: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I am.

KATIE: Oh... yeah.

(baby cooing)

She's adorable.

What?

BRITT: You know we can't go
to their wedding, right?

KATIE: Why not?

BRITT: 'Cause no one
would look at the bride.

KATIE: Where's Hank?

BRITT: I think he jumped.

(seagull calling)

GRETCHEN: You.

HANK: Hey, Red.

Thanks for making it.

GRETCHEN: Likewise.

There's that tie again.

HANK: Yeah, well, my
underwear's clean, too.

GRETCHEN: And you cut your hair.

STEPH: He hates it.

HANK: Yeah. Hey, don't ever
go to a barber named Delilah.

STEPH: Or Hank.

GRETCHEN: Steph, the
dress looks great.

STEPH: And I brushed.

Congratulations on your
marriage to not-Hank.

GRETCHEN: Thanks, honey.

HANK: Hey, you know, this reminds
me of our engagement party.

GRETCHEN: Oh, we didn't
have an engagement party.

HANK: Oh, that's right.

I'm glad you're here, Hank.

You didn't have to be.

HANK: You didn't ha to invite me.

GRETCHEN: It was Jason's idea.

HANK: Well, he's a pip.

(train bell clanging)

JASON: Everybody.

Uh, you guys, um, first of all,
Gretchen and I want to thank

you all for coming out today.

We both feel incredibly blessed
to have so many friends an-and

family here to share in our joy.

And it is a joy.

Gretchen knows that if I'd had
my way, we'd have been married

the first week we met.

I'm glad we didn't.

I'm an architect, and I know how
important it is to create a... a

solid foundation.

A structure with integrity.

And our love is our foundation.

And you guys-- our friends and
our family, are, uh, the beams

and girders which lift us up.

So, we want to thank you.

Um, I also want to say,
Gretchen, you're a miracle.

You came into my life at a moment when
I'd stopped believing in miracles.

You've renewed my faith.

You've renewed my life.

You make me alive.

And I cannot wait to call you my wife.

(applause)

(cheering)

HANK: Just had to get that architect
stuff in there, didn't he?

BRITT: Yeah.

I-I got to-- I got to pee.

Excuse me.

HANK: Excuse me.

How odd of an architect to use a
house metaphor for their love, huh?

Hey, are you okay?

I haven't seen you like this
since we listened to Wuthering

Heights on tape.

BRITT: Did you see Katie, man?

I mean, did you see her?

HANK: Yeah.
Sh-She looks beautiful.

BRITT: So what am I waiting for?

I mean, maybe I'll screw it up,
but right now, exactly now, when

I hear her call my name when she
walks in the door, I wake up in

the morning I see her feet at
the end of the bed, it just...

HANK: She's...
she's a beautiful person.

BRITT: Hank, I'm going to do it.

I'm going to do it-- I'm going
to ask Katie to marry me.

I'm going to ask her to spend
the rest of her life with me.

HANK: That's-- it's terrific.

BRITT: Wait, wait, wait, wait,
how did you get this number?

HANK: It's cumulative, okay?

Ten grand for site rental,
15 for food, entertainment,

rehearsal dinner, open bar.

We're not even talking about the tuxes,
her dress, rings-- it adds up.

BRITT: It's a good thing we
just made a hundred grand.

I know where my half is going.

HANK: Oh, yeah, hey, about those bearer
bonds-- um, we can't touch those.

BRITT: Did you spend it?

HANK: I didn't spend it.

BRITT: Hank...
HANK: I stored it.

Look, we can't touch that until this
Lindus shit is well and cooled down.

BRITT: Well, how long
is that going to take?

HANK: Two years.

BRITT: I'm not waiting two
years to marry Katie.

HANK: No one's saying you should.

MAGGIE: Thanks for
getting here so fast.

I appreciate it.

BRITT: Where's the baby?

MAGGIE: I sold it.

You know, it shit
absolutely everywhere.

He's at home-- which
is where I should be.

I didn't cut into my maternity leave
so you bozos could make bingo money.

These clients are important people.

They are better than you.

Right now I'm just handling some
minor probate stuff for them,

but if all goes well, they sign with
the firm and that's good for me.

And what's good for Mama, etcetera...
So try not to screw this up.

BRITT: Your boobs are huge.

MAGGIE: Stop staring
at my son's lunch.

HANK: Hard not to.

So the stone is sapphire.

It's Beth's great-grandmother's.

So you can understand why we're
so anxious to get it back.

HANK: When did you first
notice it missing?

BETH: A few weeks ago.

I was going through my estate,
getting my affairs in order.

As you probably guessed, I
haven't much time left.

Beth, don't talk like that.

You're going to be with
us for a very long time.

We've beaten the odds before.

The doctors told her she had,
like, six months to live.

That was over two years ago.

BETH: In any event, I intend on
leaving it to my son, Matthew.

He's 16.

Of course, I won't be around
when he's able to give it to a

young lady, but I wanted to
make sure that he had it.

MAGGIE: Of course.

BRITT: So you don't really know for
sure how long it's been missing?

BETH: No, we don't.

Dale has a theory, though.

DALE: Yeah, I don't want to
accuse anybody, but we have a

woman Flora, that's worked
for us for 15 years.

HANK: You think the maid did it?

DALE: Oh, no, no, Flora--
she'd never do that.

But she's got a brother that
stayed with her for a couple

weeks last summer.

He's not a U.S. citizen.

I believe he's working
at a hotel downtown.

He would have had access to the house.

HANK: Hey, does it strike you
as remotely hinky that Pablo

rifles through the missus's jewelry
box and only takes one thing?

BRITT: Yeah, more than a little bit.

DALE: Hey, fellas, fellas, excuse me.

Listen, what I said back there,
I didn't want to upset my wife.

Flora's brother didn't
really steal the ring.

As a matter of fact, it's
not really even missing.

HANK: You know where it is?

DALE: I know who I gave it to.

HANK: Oh, so you have a girlfriend
in addition to a wife, huh, Dale?

DALE: I know I look like an asshole
for cheating on my dying wife.

HANK: No, don't be
so easy on yourself.

DALE: Hey, listen, in my defense,
things between Beth and

I weren't good for a very long time.

I was going to marry Paolo.

That's why I gave her the ring.

When Beth's condition worsened--
what am I going to do, put her

through a divorce as well?

BRITT: Yeah, that would be wrong.

DALE: Anyway, Paolo got tired of
waiting around, so she broke it off.

And now she won't see me,
she won't talk to me.

HANK: She won't give
you the ring back.

DALE: Exactly.

There's an extra grand in it for you guys
if you can resolve this thing discreetly.

Get the ring back from Paolo, we
make up some kind of story about

where you found it, and Beth can
have some sort of peace about this.

BRITT: Let me ask you something.

Why not get your squeeze a new ring?

Why give her your wife's heirloom?

DALE: Beth hated that ring.

She never wore it.

I didn't even think she'd miss it.

It's not even worth that much.

Probably like five grand,
something like that.

To be honest with you, I
thought she'd be dead by now.

So how do we check for
intestinal parasites?

Two ways-- direct observation and...
Anyone?

I know you want to hear me say it.

Fecal floatation.

As vets, you'll become intimately
familiar with excrement.

All right, that's our time.

Lecture slides will be up online.

But, more importantly,
it's karaoke night.

This week's musical
theme-- '80s movies.

Come on, I want to see all
you animals out there.

BRITT: Ten bucks says
shorty with the booty.

HANK: I'm going blonde streaks.

BRITT: Okay.

(phone dialing)

(phone ringing through)

Verve Salon.

HANK: Yes, hi.
Is Paolo Alvarez working today.

Just one moment.

Paolo.

BRITT: Put it on my tab.

PAOLO: This is Paolo.

HANK: Yes, I'd like to
make an appointment.

Are you accepting walk-ins?

PAOLO: Yeah, I can take you today.

(phone ringing)

HANK: How are you looking
for the next 15 minutes?

PAOLO: Yes, of course.

BRITT: Hey, baby.

KATIE: y, listen, you know
how I told you Owen's

parasitology class does
karaoke on Thursday nights?

BRITT: Okay.

KATIE: Yeah, well, um, we
just got out of class, and

they're kind of leaning on me to go with,
and probably wouldn't hurt my grade.

BRITT: Baby, you should totally go.

KATIE: All right, well, I was
thinking maybe you could join me.

BRITT: Well, uh, we're kind
of on a case right now.

OWEN: Hey, Katie, are
you going to join us?

KATIE: Um, right.

Well, maybe I'll just
tell them next week.

BRITT: No, no, no, no, no.

What are you talking about?

You should-- listen, go
hang with your friends.

KATIE: Well, they're
not really friends.

They're more like classmates.

And they're young.

BRITT: Well, I hang with Hank
and, you know, he's old.

All right, well, look, it could go late,
so are you all right letting Winston out?

BRITT: Yeah, baby.

Everyone will poop
successfully in your absence.

Have fun, flirt with your
teacher, get that GPA up.

KATIE: Okay. I love you.

BRITT: I love you.

Well?

KATIE: I'm in.

Yeah. The boyfriend?

KATIE: Yeah, he, um, he has to work.

I'm starting to think
he doesn't exist.

See you there.

HANK: What are we thinking?

Full hawk, dreds, braids?

PAOLO: Your hair-- braids.

HANK: Braids aren't too feminine?

PAOLO: Oh, rows are manly.

Big commitment though.

HANK: Yeah, probably that bead
maintenance is tough, huh?

I always wondered about that.

What with your bracelets
and rings and all that.

Does that get-- does that
get caught up in the hair?

PAOLO: Oh, honey, that's why we don't
wear nothing like that on the job.

HANK: Ah.

PAOLO: Come on.

HANK: That's smart.

Oh, great.

Oh, yeah.

Um, hey, you know, could
you do me a favor, Paolo?

Could I ask you for
a second go around?

Would you mind shampooing
the old noggin again?

This weather's wreaking
havoc on my scalp.

PAOLO: You like my magic fingers, huh?

HANK: Busted.

You've got a lucky boyfriend.

PAOLO: Boyfriend? Ha.

HANK: Ooh, I sense a story there.

BRITT: Hey, sorry.

Uh, where's the bathroom at?

PAOLO: Oh, right back there, sweetie.

BRITT: Right here?

PAOLO: Just past the break room.

HANK: Oh, so that's really...
That's messed up.

BRITT: Hey.

I'm glad you walked in.

Do you know where the
paper towels are?

I couldn't find any, and
the restroom's all out.

Oh, let me grab some for you, cutie.

BRITT: Thanks.

PAOLO: Boyfriend say three months.

In three months, we'll be together.

A year pass.

And then two years pass.

I say forget about it, buddy.

I no wait no more.

HANK: I don't blame you.

What a shithead.

PAOLO: Yeah.

HANK: I mean, this was after
he gave you the ring?

PAOLO: Yeah, but it was old.

Not even a diamond.

HANK: Probably threw that
shit right back in his face.

PAOLO: Hell, no.

You think I'm giving
anything back to him?

Not a chance.

HANK: You know what you should do?

You should sell that thing.

Make a few hundred bucks.

You'll feel worlds better.

I'm really good at that kind of stuff.

If you want, I'll take a look at it
and tell you how much it's worth.

Do you have it here?

PAOLO: How you say you find me?

HANK: Uh, the recommendation of a friend...
PAOLO: Cabron, your friend!

Dale sent you didn't he?!

You know what, you can tell that
hijo de puta that he can eat shit!

And I sold his crappy
ring already, okay?

HANK: Okay, but my...
PAOLO: Get out of here!

(yelling in Spanish)

BRITT: Well, at least you
got a free deep condition.

HANK: Yeah, and the name of
the person she sold it to.

I'm not just in it for the perks.

BRITT: Yeah, there's that.

HANK: Hey, things are going to
change, that's all I'm saying.

BRITT: Dude, why should they change?

We already live together, our
funds are intermingled, she

pees with the door open, man.

HANK: I'm not talking
about you and her.

BRITT: What, between us?

HANK: Yeah.

Marriage changes things.

Pretty soon it's, "I got
to check with the wife.

I promised the wife.

The wife don't cotton to that."

BRITT: No, I never say "cotton."

HANK: Oh, you'll say "cotton."

BRITT: All right, so assuming we
find the vendor that she sold

it to, and assuming that the
vendor still has it, what are we

supposed to do about it, buy it back?

HANK: In a place like this, they might
not know what they have, right?

So we make a low-ball offer, see
if they make the deal, and we

sell it back to Komack retail.

BRITT: Boom.
Get the full five grand.

That's going to pay for the wedding
photographer and the band right there.

HANK: Serve that douche bag right.

Hey, looking for something special?

BRITT: A ring.

For your girl, eh?

HANK: Yep, and a lovely
little gal she is.

And he's finally looking to
make an honest woman of her.

BRITT: She is honest.

HANK: So we're looking for
something old, very tasteful,

used, maybe with a sapphire.

I have just the thing.

That diamond, this sapphire, eh?

I thought you want sapphire.

HANK: We do, we do.

Uh, do you have anything
that looks like this?

No. Did, not now.

Sold it.

HANK: Out of curiosity, how
much did you get for it?

$250.

HANK: Do you remember
who you sold it to?

Sure. Regular customer.

HANK: Angelo Baldamotti?

ANGELO: That's my name, man.

Don't wear it out.

(both laughing)

BRITT: That's sweet.

HANK: That's good, man.

Listen, you got a ring
from the Ethiopian mart.

We want to buy it off you.

BRITT: You paid $250 for it.

We're willing to go as high as $500.

ANGELO: Huh?

HANK: Not that one.

ANGELO: Huh?

BRITT: Not that one.

ANGELO: I got that one.

HANK: Nah.
You got anything else?

ANGELO: Yeah.

HANK: No, that's not it.

Does, uh, does this
look familiar to you?

ANGELO: Yeah.

HANK: Great. Where is it?

ANGELO: I had to pay some bills, man.

Where do you guys know Angelo from?

HANK: He does my taxes.

So anything in particular
you guys are looking for?

BRITT: Wow.

Yeah, that's the Amstel Gold.

Smokes soft, has nice
ustrus undertones.

BRITT: Lemony.

HANK: Actually, we're
not looking for weed.

We're looking for a ring.

You guys use the volcano vaporizer?

I've got extra O-rings
in the other room.

HANK: No, no, no, no, no, no.

An antique ring, like a sapphire.

BRITT: Show him the pictures.

Ah, you mean the ring that Angelo
used to bring his accounts current.

HANK: That's the one.

I don't have it anymore.

BRITT: Aw. You sold it?

To a customer.

She went crazy over
it, had to have it.

HANK: Can you give us her name?

No. We do not release the
names of our clients.

HANK: Oh, would you release
them to the police, because I

think they'd be pretty interested in
the operation you got going on here.

The police already know about it.

I'm registered with the state.

This is a legal operation.

I have a license to grow
marijuana for medical purposes.

BRITT: Shit.

HANK: Okay.

So, Angelo-- right?

What was he suffering from?

BRITT: Yeah, he had a kind of an owie.

HANK: I mean, does the state
know that you're bartering your

product for jewelry-- stolen jewelry?

Fine.

Keep my name out of it.

She's a legitimate customer
with good insurance.

Not like these Medicaid deadbeats.

And she's very ill.

HANK: Does that name
look familiar to you?

BRITT: Elizabeth.

Yeah, long for Beth.

BRITT: Komack.

HANK: Short for what the hell.

BETH: So you found me out.

And in less than 24 hours.

Ms. Levritz said you
were good detectives.

BRITT: She's a really good lawyer.

She's the best, really top-notch.

HANK: So why the goose gocha, Mrs.
Komack, if you had it the whole time?

BETH: Because I wasn't sure.

I lied to you before.

I didn't discover it missing
while I was making my will.

I didn't even know it was
gone until I found it.

BRITT: At your dealer's?

BETH: Yes.

How it got there, I can only guess.

I tried to trace it back and
got as far as a street vendor.

She said some young Latino
woman had sold it to her.

Which is just my husband's taste,
based on the description.

But she had no name.

HANK: An-And you never confronted
your husband about this?

BETH: I told Dale that I discovered
it missing to gauge his reaction.

And without hesitation, he
implicated my housekeeper's

brother, which could
make sense, I guess.

If it had been stolen, it could
have ended up back in my hands

through the usual Rube
Goldberg of street commerce.

But the fact that you traced it
back to where I found it, that

can only mean one thing-- my
husband gave you the name of the

woman who sold it.

Because he gave it to her.

Because she's his mistress.

I'd like that name.

HANK: That wasn't the job.

BETH: The job parameters have changed.

HANK: This is a personal matter
between you and your husband.

BETH: I'm dying.

I need that name to give to
my attorney so I can file for

divorce so I can amend my will.

Because, obviously, I can't trust
Dale to put his head before his dick.

So If I don't separate my estate
before I die, Matthew could lose

everything.

He doesn't come to majority
for two more years.

I will not be here to protect him.

I need to do it now while I can.

Please.

HANK: Paolo Alvarez.

BETH: Thank you.

I need one more thing.

I need you to get the ring.

BRITT: I thought you had it.

BETH: It's at our home.

I-- I don't trust it being
there while I'm here.

HANK: Okay.

BETH: And there's one more
thing my husband doesn't know.

It's not a sapphire--
it's a blue diamond.

It's worth $300,000.

DALE: Good evening, Mr. Dolworth.

You have what I was looking for?

HANK: Uh, my partner is on his
way over here right now, but

I have a couple of questions first.

I mean, did she consider this
ring to be a promise of marriage?

DALE: Do you have the
ring or don't you?

HANK: Uh, not quite.

Your little spitfire-- she wasn't
so enthralled with the ring.

She hocked it.

In fact, she had a lot of
not-so-complimentary things to say about you.

DALE: Really? Like what?

HANK: Well, she was ranting in Spanish,
and she kept making this gesture.

You have any idea
what that might mean?

DALE: We got to find out
who she sold it to.

HANK: She wouldn't give me a name.

She just said she dumped it at one
of those outdoor jewelry marts.

My partner's looking into it though.

DALE: That's great, that's great.

It could be anywhere, then.

HANK: Yeah, it could.

It really... could.

DALE: If you locate one of the
vendors, you think that, uh,

2,500 bucks is enough to barter with?

HANK: I mean, it's a start.

Dolworth, one "L."

DALE: All right.

If you don't get the ring back,
obviously I want this back.

HANK: Good.

DALE: What's up?

BRITT: Hi, guys.

(phone ringing)

DALE: Excuse me one second.

Hello.

BRITT: Hey, I think we got a problem.

HANK: What?

BRITT: Guess where she
gets her wigs done?

HANK: Oh, man.

DALE: That was the hospital.

Beth's gone.

HANK: Oh, I'm so sorry.

BRITT: Condolences, man, really.

DALE: She's not dead.

She's gone missing.

And, apparently, you were the
last visitors that she had.

What the hell did you guys say to her?

Where the hell is she?

KATIE: So are you in vet
school or nursing school?

Why?

KATIE: 'Cause you're nursing that
drink like it's going out of style.

(camera shutter clicking)

Tender, two Long Islands.

No can do.

KATIE: What?

Place won't serve Long Islands
or play Celine Dion after 10:00.

Can't be seen as inciting violence.

KATIE: Fine.

Two buttery nipples.

So, what's it like dating a ghost?

KATIE: You gonna drink that?

You know, that's called deflecting.

KATIE: Yeah, I was just trying to
spare your ego, buddy, but okay.

Um, he makes me laugh.

He's good to me.

Great in bed.

Yeah, things are pretty much perfect.

OWENS: Okay, we're back.

And now for her inaugural turn
on the parasitology 101 mic, the

lovely Ms. Katie Nicols is going to
sing Olivia Newton John's "Suddenly."

So come on up, Katie.

Whoo!

(applause)

All right.

Oh, hold on, this is a duet.

We need a man.

Gavin, get up here, come on.

KATIE: Thanks, Professor.

OWENS: Yes.

♪ Look at me can't you tell I'd be so
thrilled to see the message in your eye... ♪

GAVIN: ? Felt so close to my dream,
than suddenly it's all right... ?

KATIE: ? Suddenly...
BOTH: ? The wheels are in

motion and I-I-I am ready
to sail any ocean... ?

PAOLO: Get the hell out of
here before I call the cops.

BETH: I want some answers.

I deserve that much.

When did it start?

PAOLO: It doesn't matter, it's over.

Look, I don't want to call the
cops on a sick lady, but...

HANK: No ons calling the cops.

BETH: Stay out of this, Mr.

Dolworth.

This is not your concern.

And I am not leaving here until...
Mommy.

(Paolo speaking Spanish)

Daddy!

PAOLO: Hush.

BETH: Oh, no.

No, God, no.

HANK: Get 'em out of here.

Go, go.

BRITT: Hey, come on, come on.

DALE: Beth...
BETH: Get out, get out, get out!

DALE: Paolo...
PAOLO: I don't have your stinking ring.

See?

HANK: Beth... Listen, Beth, we have
to take you back to the hospital now.

BETH: Why?

HANK: Because you're sick.

BETH: Yeah?

And stupid.

Six years of stupid.

That chair, that one-- I sat in
that chair for six years and

told her my whole life.

About my family.

And she used it all.

I just wanted one last bit of dignity.

To face her.

To hear her say it was over.

But it will never be over.

He was supposed to love me,
till death do us part.

What, he couldn't wait ten minutes?

He's gonna lose me, you know.

He's gonna lose me and
then he's gonna be sorry.

(sobbing)

HANK: Yeah.

Yeah, he will.

Yeah, he will.

MAGGIE: How is she?

BRITT: She collapsed
outside the hair salon.

MAGGIE: Shit!

HANK: Asshole's in there with her now.

BRITT: Hey, if she doesn't come
out of it, do we still have

to give him this?

MAGGIE: You did find it.

Dale thought...
HANK: Dale doesn't know.

She didn't want him to know, Mags.

BRITT: She wants it to go to her kid.

Can't you just hang on
to it till he turns 18?

MAGGIE: I'm now
officially their lawyer.

I do that, I could lose my license.

I never saw this.

MATTHEW: Excuse me,
I'm Matthew Komack.

My dad called, he said that my mom...
MAGGIE: Matthew.

I'm Maggie Levritz.

I'm a friend of your parents.

MATTHEW: How is she?

DALE: Matthew.

MATTHEW: Dad.

DALE: Come here.

MAGGIE: Let's hope she's around
long enough to amend her

will, or file for divorce.

HANK: Until then, we hold
on to it for the kid.

BRITT: Yeah.

(phone ringing)

Hey, it's Britt.
Leave me a message.

GAVIN: Having problems?

KATIE: Yeah.
The key doesn't work.

GAVIN: Maybe it's 'cause
it's not your car.

KATIE: Oh.

(laughing)

GAVIN: Hey, don't be embarrassed.

I've made the same mistake...
oh, never.

KATIE: You asshole.

GAVIN: It's a simple sobriety test.

I mean, if you can't find your
car, then maybe you shouldn't

drive it home.

KATIE: That's actually
very good advice.

GAVIN: Why don't you let
me give you a ride.

KATIE: I can't ride you--
I have a boyfriend.

GAVIN: He's not here.

KATIE: No, he's not.

Gavin!

GAVIN: It's not like you're married.

KATIE: I have to go.

Oh!

OWENS: You okay?

KATIE: I said no, okay?

OWENS: Katie?

Hey, everything okay here?

GAVIN: Everything's fine, Professor.

STEPH: "Zoologist," a
double-letter score on "L" and

two triple-word scores equals 180.

You lose.

And rather badly.

Hey.

JASON: Hank.

STEPH: Okay, am I done
entertaining for the night?

I'm bushed.

JASON: Steph, thanks
for a lovely evening.

STEPH: Uh-huh.

HANK: Uh, so, uh, what's up?

Where's Gretchen?

JASON: She's not here.

I uh, I wanted to
have a word with you.

I tried calling, but I
got your voice mail.

HANK: I was at the hospital.

I had to, uh, turn my phone off.

JASON: Oh, is everything okay?

HANK: Yeah.

Yeah, just a case.

Uh, so, uh, what can
I do for you, Jason?

JASON: You can stop
using my credit cards.

HANK: Shit.

JASON: Your partner Britt--

I realized where I knew him from.

That day I was being fitted for my
tux, he lifted my wallet, didn't he?

HANK: Yeah.
It's not his fault.

He didn't know who you were.

JASON: I mean it needs to stop, Hank.
It... HANK: It does.

It did.

It-it's done.

JASON: You know, I-- I invited
you to our engagement

party for two reasons.

One because after meeting
you, I genuinely liked you.

I know how important
you are to Gretchen.

She wants you in our life.

But mostly I wanted you
to see how happy she is.

I'm going to marry her, Hank.

That's going to happen.

I need you to know that.

(door closing)

(clock ticking)

♪ Are you gonna be somebody
who really loves me♪

Hope that you can see just how
much I'm gonna love you, baby ?

(stereo clicks off)

(soft gasp)

BRITT: It's not what you think.

KATIE: What?

BRITT: It's um, it's an heirloom Hank
and I had to track down for a case.

(yawning)

Did track down.

You had fun?

KATIE: Yeah, it was okay.

You know, it's hard keeping
up with those kids.

Like, shots on top of shots
inside of beers, you know.

BRITT: Yeah.

KATIE: Hey, babe, um, I...
I had to taxi home.

I hope you don't mind driving
me to my car in the morning.

BRITT: No, I don't
mind, of course not.

I'm glad you got to let
loose a little bit.

You needed it.

KATIE: Yeah.
Were you waiting up for me?

BRITT: Well, not, you
know, not in a bad way.

I kind of wish you
didn't see that ring.

Now you're going to be expecting...
KATIE: I don't expect anything.

BRITT: You okay, baby?

KATIE: Yeah.
My head's, like, pounding.

I think I'm going to shower.

BRITT: Okay.

Yeah, babe, do what you got to do.

(doorbell ringing)

HANK: Come on in. It's open.

Hey.

What's all that?

GRETCHEN: Oh, uh, leftovers.

From the party.

You ducked out so quick, I was afraid
you didn't get to try anything.

HANK: Oh, thanks.

GRETCHEN: What's with all the schmutz?

HANK: Oh, I was digging for
buried treasure in the backyard.

Keeping Steph occupied.

GRETCHEN: Crafts?

HANK: More like taking
the truck engine apart.

GRETCHEN: So, uh, Jason told me
about the credit card thing.

HANK: Oh, yeah.

GRETCHEN: He said you traced it
to some Nigerian Internet ring.

HANK: Something like that..

GRETCHEN: Hank, this cottage
cheese is from the Bush

administration-- the first one.

So we don't have to
worry about it anymore?

It's all done?

HANK: Yep.

GRETCHEN: Well, we both
want to thank you.

HANK: It was nothing.

GRETCHEN: It's not nothing.

You said you'd take care of it,
and you did, and appreciate that.

So does Jason.

HANK: Tell him you're welcome.

GRETCHEN: I will.

HANK: He's a pretty
decent sort, isn't he?

GRETCHEN: Yeah, he is.

HANK: And he makes you happy?

GRETCHEN: Very.

HANK: That's good.

GRETCHEN: Okay, eat cake.

I got to scoot.

Good-bye, Hank.

HANK: Bye, Gretch.

(phone ringing)

Hello.

Hey, girl.

KATIE: Thanks for coming.

HANK: You're welcome.

Hey, thank you.

Where's Britt?

KATIE: Sleeping.

HANK: What's wrong?

KATIE: (shuddering breath)

HANK: Look, I know the kid
ain't perfect, but he'll come

around eventually, right?

KATIE: I don't deserve him.

HANK: What are you
talking about, Katie?

He's the luckiest guy in
the world to have you.

KATIE: Hank, I messed up.

HANK: What did you do?

No, you didn't.

KATIE: I got drunk and I...
HANK: Shh. Please, don't.

You don't have to
finish that sentence.

Is it someone from school?

KATIE: My professor.

I-I don't know how I'm
supposed to go back there.

HANK: All right, listen,
you were drunk.

It wasn't you, hmm?

And you didn't know
what you were doing.

KATIE: No, I got-- I was drunk
and it wasn't me, but I

knew exactly what I was doing.

HANK: Then why?

KATIE: I don't know.

I mean, I've been feeling the
way he's looking at me lately.

And I pretty much know
what's coming next.

HANK: But that's what you want.

KATIE: That's exactly what I want.

HANK: Then why-why won't
you let yourself have it?

KATIE: What's wrong with me?

Why, Hank, when everything's
like so perfect?

HANK: Yeah, drive a big
dynamite truck right into it?

KATIE: Yeah.

HANK: Probably because somewhere
deep down inside you--

you just don't feel
like you deserve it.

KATIE: I'm gonna lose him.

I know it.

I'm so scared.

(sobbing)

HANK: Katie, come on.

Come here.

Come here.

It's okay, it's okay, it's okay.

KATIE: Oh, my God, he's
never going to forgive me.

HANK: No. No, he's not...
Because you're not going to tell him.

KATIE: What?

HANK: Look at me.

You're going to lie to him.

You're going to go back to school.

This never happened.

KATIE: I tell him everything.

HANK: Listen, he can
never know about this.

And I know this might kill you a
little bit, and it might eat you

up inside a little bit, but it'll
kill him more if he-- if he knew.

Okay?

So you got to forget it happened.

Okay?

KATIE: I can't do that.

(sobbing)

HANK: Then pretend.