Teen Titans Go! (2013–…): Season 5, Episode 13 - Justice League's Next Top Talent Idol Star: Second Greatest Team Edition - full transcript

[ANIMAL SOUNDS]

Go!
[TITLE MUSIC]

♪ T E E N T I T A N S ♪

♪ Teen Titans let's go ♪

♪ [scratching]
T-TEEN, T-TEE-TEEN ♪

♪ Teen Titans, go! ♪

Wassup, y'all, [MUSIC]
I'm your host, Birdarang.

Last time on our show,
one hero impressed the judges

and became the newest member
of the Justice League.

Dummy Robin!

And now, he's joining
our panel of judges.



Tonight, the greatest
superhero team in the universe,

will decide
who deserves the title of

Second Greatest Superhero Team
in the Universe.

And the winners get an
all-expense paid vacation to

the Hall Of Justice!
Word!

How will we decide
who's the second greatest?

We're gonna have ourselves
a song and dance part-ay!

And it all starts right now.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

We gots all the hottest teens from
the DC universe representin', yo!

[PLAYING BAGPIPES]

But the favorites in this contest
are definitely The Teen Titans, y'all!

Titans, get ready!
Get ready! Go!

We are going to absolutely
destroy the competition. [GROANS]



It's actually sad that

the other teams think
they can compete with us.

Wah! [BLOWS NOSE]
So, so sad.

I'm being sarcastic.

We's got a deep playlist
full of songs and dances,

and we's gonna pull 'em out, yo!

And I have the new song
and dance I wish to perform.

ALL: [HESITANTLY] Yeah...

We talked about this,
remember, Star?

Yes. You said I was
the secret weapon

and I would be used
as the last resort.

Uh, that's right, Star.
As a last resort. [CLEARS THROAT]

Because we don't want to
unleash those moves on the world

unless we have to.
[TRIBAL MUSIC]

♪ Ow, waka kaka kaka
Chau cau cau Chau cau cau ♪

♪ Chau cau cau Waka kaka,
kaka kaka Kaka kaka chau ♪

Musically and rhythmically,
she's the Ringo of the group.

[SLOW MUSIC]
[CLICKING IN DISCOMFORT]

BIRDARANG: So many heroes,
so much talent,

but these do-gooders are about
to get the surprise of a lifetime

when they see the final team
enter the competition.

[HIP HOP INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

Waddup, waddup!
H.I.V.E. in the house!

Criminal filth.
Titans, go!

[ALL CLAMORING]

BIRDARANG: Check yourselves before
you wreck yourselves, homies.

They ain't here to beef,
they're here to get down.

- You mean the H.I.V.E. is in the competition?
- Ow. Ow. Ow.

But this is supposed to be
for heroes only. [GROANING]

Peep the Rule Book
and slow your roll, yo!

There ain't nothin' here that
says villains can't compete.

[ALL ARGUING INDISTINCTLY]

We know that we're
not exactly welcome here.

- But we're not up to anything bad.
- The H.I.V.E. may not be heroes,

but when it comes to singin'
and dancin', we got it goin' on.

[VOCALIZING]

Yee-haw!
We're here as performers.

- We came to win.
- Fair and square, baby.

The H.I.V.E. cannot be trusted!

Them dirty villains are gonna cheat
the first chance they get. Watch!

And you can
tell them we said that.

The Titans said
we're going to cheat?

You should be more worried
about them. They're the cheaters.

[FAST-PACED MUSIC]

[GULPING]

[BUZZER SOUNDS]

[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
[BUZZER SOUNDING]

[INDISTINCT NERVOUS CHATTER]

[STARFIRE LAUGHS SHEEPISHLY]

Them H.I.V.E.s is the only team in
this competition that could beat us, yo!

I can only imagine the fate of the
world if they were somehow

declared the second best
team in the DC Universe.

You don't have to imagine.
I can show you.

Azarath Metrion Zinthos!
[EXPLOSION]

[STATIC HISSING]

You mean if the H.I.V.E. wins...

[LOUDLY]
Nothing will change at all?

Life will go on exactly as it is now?

The outcome of the contest will
have no impact upon the future?

I'm afraid so.

[ALL SCREAMING]

Pull yourself together, Titans!

There's absolutely nothing at stake!

[SOBBING]
We can't lose our cool!

We need an opening number
to put us on top.

Friends, perhaps it is time
to use our secret weapon.

- The me.
- No.

We ain't that desperate yet, Ringo.

We're goin' with
the solid gold hits.

That's right. A classic
dance known as...

Wait for it.
The Booty Scooty.

BIRDARANG: Comin' up, the Teen Titans

will perform a dance they made famous.

But first, the H.I.V.E. is
gonna do that same dance.

[CROWD CHEERING]

- What?
- They's doin' our dance?

This is an outrage.
An outrage!

- They're cheating.
- Peep the Rule Book, yo!

I will not peep the Rule
Book, yo! They can't do this!

You got it twisted, yo.
They can and they are.

Chickety-check it.

[FAST-PACED HIP-HOP MUSIC]

[YELLING]

[SINGING]

♪ Scoot your booty that booty
now do the booty scooty ♪

♪ Scoot, scoot scoot
that booty booty ♪

♪ Scoot, scoot
scoot that booty booty ♪

♪ Scoot your booty that booty
now do the booty scooty ♪

♪ Scoot your booty
that booty now do the booty scooty ♪

[YELLING]

[CROWD CHEERING]
[BUZZERS DINGING]

Wassup!
Super fresh moves by the H.I.V.E.

Not sure I'd wanna bite their
style and follow that dance,

- with the same dance.
- We knew you would cheat.

What are you talking about?

- That was our dance!
- Really? What a funny coincidence.

It ain't funny
nor was it coincidence.

It is clear evidence of
some cheat-ery shenanigans!

Yeah, we did their dance.

Someone should tell them they
don't own The Booty Scooty.

I don't see their names
on these booties.

Yee-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Titans... [DEEP BREATH]
we must stay calm.

Let's not forget what's at stake

if we lose this competition!
[GROANS]

It's of utmost importance that
we win this meaningless contest.

- But how?
- Are we at the last resort?

Is it time for me to
perform my sing and dance?

I's checkin' my watch, Star.
[WATCH CUCKOOS]

It ain't that time.

We need to come up with a
dance to beat The Booty Scooty.

- Quick!
- There is only one dance

as tried, true and powerful
as The Booty Scooty.

[INHALES SHARPLY]
The Lift.

[MUSIC]

Up next are the Teen Titans.

[APPLAUSE]

[SNAPS FINGERS]

[ROMANTIC MUSIC]

AUDIENCE: Aw!

[STRAINING]

[ROBIN GROANING]
[LEG SNAPS]

[SCREAMS]

[LEG SNAPS]
[SCREAMS]

[GASPING]
[CROWD JEERING]

[BUZZERS BEEP]

[BUZZER DINGS]

[ALL CHEER]

[ALL CHEERING]

- We're still in the competition.
- On a technicality.

[FANFARE PLAYS] And now, our only chance

to stay in the competition
rests with one person.

- [GASPS] The me?
- Not you, Ringo. Beast Boy!

[GROWLING SOFTLY]

Just remember, if we lose,

our lives will not be affected
at all!

[ALL SCREAMING]

- Oh, the humanity!
- Chill.

Don't even worry
about them H.I.V.E.s no mo'.

Them judges gonna flip when they
find out I gots that Mummy Money!

Up next, we got a slammin'
hard track y'all mighta heard,

[READING]

Performed by...

- See-More from the H.I.V.E.
- What?

Y'all ever got so much money, you
ain't know how to spend it? Check.

♪ Oh, I bought a gold boat
bought a gold star ♪

♪ Bought a gold bat
put them in the gold car ♪

♪ Bought a gold fridge
filled it with some gold food ♪

♪ Bought a gold me
I call him the Gold Dude ♪

♪ I'm makin' that money
that pyramid Mummy Money ♪

♪ I'm makin' money that
pyramid scheme money ♪

♪ Makin' that money
that pyramid Mummy Money ♪

♪ I'm makin' money
that pyramid scheme money ♪

♪ Gonna stack my money
brick by brick ♪

♪ Check my gold fronts
I go lick, lick, lick ♪

♪ Need a new wallet
'cause my money don't fit ♪

♪ Bought a gold bomb
that go tick, tick, tick ♪

♪ Makin' that money that
pyramid Mummy Money ♪ [CHEERING]

♪ I'm makin' money
that pyramid scheme money ♪

♪ Makin' that money
that pyramid Mummy Money ♪

♪ I'm makin' money
that pyramid scheme money ♪

[AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING]

[BUZZERS DINGING]

BIRDARANG: Oh, snap!
What a performance!

The H.I.V.E. is bringin'
the heat tonight, y'all.

Ah! What am I
gonna sing now?

Beast Boy! Get out here
and represent, homie.

Uh...
[MICROPHONE FEEDBACK]

[MAN COUGHING]
Hi! [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

I'm a person.

Um, I wanted to sing, uh...
It's a song!

Uh, that I know!
It gots words.

Well, don't leave us hangin', dawg.
Start spittin' some lyrics.

Oh! [STAMMERING]
Okay, okay, I gots it.

[BEAST BOY CLEARS THROAT]
[SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

This song is a little somethin'
my mom and dad used to sing me,

and my mama and my friends

and everybody who pretty
much was around too.

And they sing it on
the same day every year!

[OFF-PITCH]
♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪

We're doomed.

♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪

♪ Happy birthday, dear pal ♪

♪ Of course it's his birthday
it's today ♪

BIRDARANG: What a nail-biter, yo.

[ALL SHIVERING]

♪ A minute more
until the floor! ♪

Could this be
the end for the Titans?

Will the H.I.V.E. be voted the second
greatest team in the DC Universe?

Will The Titans fail to
remain exactly the same

- regardless of the outcome?
- Scooby-Doo on Channel 2.

Find out next time

on Justice League's
Next Top Talent Idol Star.

Second Greatest Team Edition.