Teen Titans Go! (2013–…): Season 2, Episode 33 - Tamaranian Vacation - full transcript

The Titans visit Starfire's homeworld, Tamaran.

2x33 - "Tamaranian Vacation"

Star, you don't have to do this.

I must.
Accept your fate, human.

- Never!
- Very well.

Remember, you asked for this.

Tickle war!

Titan, Tita...
Titans, go!

No, don't. Don't do it!

I got to pee!

Yeah, you got me.

It's no use, Star.
My computer parts cannot be tickled.


Belly button!

And I couldn't forget
you, my little bumgorf.

- Man, Starfire is so upbeat!
- Her happiness makes me happy.

Thirteen seconds.

That's the longest you were
ever in a good mood, mama.

That was a record.

I have to know, Star,

where does your cheery
disposition come from?

I suppose it comes from growing up
on my home planet, Tamaran.

If it made you this nice,

it must be the best
place in the universe.

Okay, okay.

Wait your turn, please.
No, no. You go next.

When you gonna take us there?

I am not sure you would like it.

We like you.
We'll like your planet.

You may find my
Tamaranian ways strange,

much like I find some of
the Earth ways strange.

A poem for milady.

Is that a sunrise on yon lake?

Nay. 'Tis your eyes.

It would mean so much to me,
if I could share this special place.

Then share away.
Let's go to space!


It is so good to be home.

Ah. I missed the crispness
of Tamaranian air.

- My lungs are crying!
- What are we breathing, Star?

That is the Tamaranian fire air.


Your planet's air is
made out of hot sauce.

It ensures the weak do not survive.

You will grow accustomed to the burning.

♪ The pain
all I know is pain ♪

Oh, do not die so quickly, friends.
We have just arrived!

There are so many more
wonderful things to see.

This place is amazing.

Give us the tour, Star.

We want to see all the
things that made you

such a sweet little cuddle bug.

As a Tamaranian princess,
this palace was my home.

We often entertained kings,
queens and warlords,

in an effort to keep
the peace of the galaxy.

This is general Thraxis
of the Blood dominion.

We are working on a very
important treaty with him now.

What up, general?

What was that about?

Oh, on Tamaran, a handshake
is the most violent declaration of war.

He has vowed to wipe out my people

and turn Tamaran into
intergalactic gravel.

My bad.

That is the all right,
but you must excuse me,

I need to rally a planetary defense.


You have to shake everyone's hand?!

I'm a friendly guy,
what do you want me to do?!

This is not what I was expecting.

I'm not sure I like Starfire's planet.

It's definitely not as sweet as she is.

True, but it's pretty cool
watching those blob guys explode.

There goes one!

Why does everything burn on this planet?

My face!

This is terrible.
Let's go before things get worse.

No, Raven. It means so much
to Starfire that we're here.

Yo! The cries
of terror have stopped.

Maybe Cyborg's handshake war is over.

Handshakes are friendly, I don't
care who you are, they are friendly.

Good news!
The war has concluded

and only three-quarters
of the planet were destroyed.

That's great!
I'm so happy for you, Starfire.

As is the custom on Tamaran,
I brokered a truce

by offering my hand in
marriage to the general.


Why did you have to shake his hand?!

Why I ask you, Cyborg, why?!

I can't help it.
I'm just a friendly guy.

I like putting people at ease.

It should have been me.

I really, really hate this planet.

How can anyone as nice and
perfect as Starfire come from here?

Ew! Look. Now she has
to kiss all those mouths.

And she never kissed
you on your one mouth.


We're gonna be here awhile.

Was the ceremony not beautiful?

Now, please enjoy the rest
of your stay on Tamaran.

- I must go.
- Where?

As the general's wife,
I must travel with his fleet

in order to attend to his mouths
as he conquers the universe.

You will never see me again.

You can't go with him!

I know our customs seem strange,
but it is important to honor them.

- Goodbye forever, friends!
- This is not cool!

If Starfire is going to
be forced to marry anyone,

it's going to be me.

Titans, let's annul this marriage.


Friends, why did
you blow up my husband?

The peace treaty is now broken.

The general's army will soon attack,
and I have dishonored my people.

And you are welcome.

- He was gross.
- Yeah, super gross!

Now the only way to save
my planet from the invasion

is in a traditional show of bravery
by fighting Gridnock, the skull crusher.

And if you don't, this
planet will be destroyed?


Sounds good to me, let's go home.

These are the guardians of honor.

They will escort us to our inevitable
deaths at the hands of Gridnock.

Hello, guardians!
Keeping those axes sharp, I see?

- Is he not magnificent?
- Why are you so happy about this?

It is an honor to prove
one's bravery on Tamaran.

So, how many people
have survived Gridnock?

That is why it is such an honor.

None, Star?

Well, he's never faced the Teen Titans.
Titans, go!

Whoa. Did we just get eaten?
That was fast!

Don't take this the wrong way, Star,

but we hate your planet
and everything on it!

- You are hurting the feelings, Robin.
- It's true. This planet is awful.

We have no idea how you
came from a place like this.

Yes, life can be hard on Tamaran.

But if I only saw the negative,

my skull would have been
crushed many years ago.

Instead, I have learned
to find the best in any situation.

In fact, that is the
only way I have been

able to tolerate you
all as my roommates.

Oh, Star, that's beautiful.

I always wondered why
you didn't hate us.

Well, if we're gonna die,

we might as well be
positive like Starfire.

We're in an alien
rock monster's belly,

what's not to love?

Look, is that a half-eaten hot dog?

Not a hot dog,

but I've never tasted
anything like it before!

Hmm. It's so nice and warm
in here like a free sauna.

Gettin' a good sweat on.


If Star survived so long
because of her positive attitude,

then we have to think like her.

You know what that means.

Tickle war!

Belly button!

We defeated the Gridnock!

Yeah, kid.

We couldn't have done it

without seeing things
the Tamaranian way, Star.

Now do you understand
why I love this planet so?

I think we do, Star.

Then, perhaps you will let
me show you more of Tamaran.

- Are you crazy?
- Let's get out of here!

Worst place ever!