Taxi (1978–1983): Season 2, Episode 4 - Nardo Loses Her Marbles - full transcript
Single mother Elaine has too many things in her life to handle at once. Her kids,being a cab driver and working at an art gallery as well. All this overwork causes her to have a near nervous breakdown. Leading her to see a psychiatrist and to look to Alex for possible "comfort",which makes Alex feel he'd be taking advantage of her emotional state.
( theme music playing )
Hey...
( laughter )
Drinks for everybody.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
In our little group.
Tony won tonight?
Does this look like
the face of a loser?
Well, in that case,
the first pitcher's on me.
Hey, thanks, Tom.
Oh, that's great.
Oh, boy, did that guy
go down hard.
That sucker hit the canvas
like a sack of cement.
Hey, you know, I'll tell you,
I was worried for a minute.
You never want to see
anybody get hurt, you know.
Ah...
Hey, you really gave it
to him good, huh, Tony?
It was a weird
thing, Tommy.
The guy was climbing
into the ring,
he trips, falls down
and knocks himself cold.
Tony won by default.
You mean,
that's what you're celebrating?
I had to make it
through the same ropes.
That'll be three bucks.
BOBBY:
Hey, look.
There's Reverend Jim.
Oh, yeah.
The guy who performed
Latka's wedding ceremony.
Hey, Reverend Jim!
Hey, how you doing,
buddy?
Fine, fine.
Uh, how you doing?
Oh, great, great.
You, uh, remember us?
Uh, nope.
Jeez, it was nice
chatting with you.
Latka!
Where have you been?
I thought you were
coming to my fight.
( speaking native language )
Latka, Latka, Latka,
calm down.
Go slowly.
All right.
I was going to
go to your fight
but I take the
wrong subway
and I end up in a
place called, uh...
how do you say,
uh, Har... Harlem.
Harlem?
So I went walking
around, uh, lost,
and I go into the bar,
and I tell everyone
I am looking for a fight.
Right.
Uh... did you find one?
Well, lots of people
offered to help.
So... uh, I sit down
and drink with them
and you know,
they make mistake.
They think I am
their brother.
( snickers )
So... so they teach
me word... new words
and lots of songs, and
we all have a good time.
Mm-hmm.
So how was your fight?
I won!
Oh, you are a bad dude.
Sit down, Latka.
When are they going to clean
those bathrooms?
You were in the kitchen.
Thank goodness.
Wait a minute--
you marry me.
Uh, believe me,
it would never work out.
No, no, no, no.
You performed
the wedding ceremony.
Yeah, yeah.
Don't you remember?
Eight months ago,
Latka had to get married
to stay in the country.
You performed the ceremony
at the Sunshine Garage.
( speaking
native language )
Oh, yeah.
I thought I dreamed that.
Maybe I'm dreaming this.
Hey, Tommy, how about
another glass, okay?
TOMMY:
You're up.
So how's the
Church of the Peaceful doing?
Not so good.
After the draft ended,
I lost my flock.
Well, have you performed
any other wedding ceremonies?
Let's see, I, uh...
married two people
stark naked in the woods.
You mean the whole
wedding party was nude?
No, just me.
They, uh...
...changed their minds
at the last minute
and forgot to tell me.
Thanks for the beer.
Yeah.
Well,
we'll see you around.
Oh, boy.
Oh, the poor guy.
You know, in-in my country
we have an expression:
( speaking native language )
What does it mean?
Uh... "Poor guy."
You know, call me crazy,
but I happen to
like the guy.
and I'm going to go
see how he's doing.
You're crazy.
You're crazy,
crazy.
( all chuckling )
Hey, uh, Jim.
Yo!
Listen, my friends and I,
we were wondering
if you'd like to come over
and join us.
Well, what did
you decide?
Well, we-we, uh...
we thought
that-that you might like to?
Okeydoke.
Of course,
I can only stay for five or six.
ELAINE:
So how you doing, Jim?
Fine, fine.
Uh, who are you
folks again?
You marry me.
In the garage.
Oh, yeah.
( imitating Latka's language )
Jim, uh,
would you mind
if I asked you a
personal question?
Well, I can take it,
if you can.
No, no, no, not
that personal.
Um, did you ever think
about doing something
with your life?
You know, like
getting a job?
As a matter of fact,
I have.
I've often thought
I'd make a good pharmacist.
A pharmacist?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, well, if you're
serious then
you have to go to school,
take a lot of chemistry...
Oh, I've taken
a lot of chemistry.
You know, this has been
a very long day for me
so I must
boogie on home now.
Boogie down,
Latka.
Boogie down.
Okay. Good-bye.
Thanks for
dropping by.
See you.
* Get on up
* Get on the scene
* I feel like a sex machine.
Last call.
I got to close it up.
Hey, Tom,
another round.
Hey, uh...
will you guys let me buy?
Yeah!
Sure!
Why not?
Any of this currency?
Next time.
Yeah, I know.
I'll get it.
Jim, I guess what
we're trying to say
is that we'd
like to help you.
ALEX:
Hey, Elaine, would
you leave him alone?
He's not asking anything
from anybody.
Besides, it's not like our lives
are in such great shape.
Yeah, but I just can't believe
he's happy this way.
You know,
getting high all the time.
Hey... no. Everything I take
is by doctor's prescription--
everything.
Though finding the right doctor
can be difficult.
Jim, please
don't be offended
by what I'm about to say,
but don't you ever feel
like you're wasting
your life?
Me? No, no.
I have function in life.
I-I stand for something.
Not everybody stands
for something, but I do.
I am the living embodiment
of the '60s.
Everything that came along,
I went with.
Even if I didn't know
what it was, I went with it.
I did some drugs...
not nearly so many
as you probably think I did.
How many drugs
do you think I did?
Mmm... a lot.
Wow! Right on the nose!
But I did a lot
of all the other stuff, too.
I spent a year of my life
making a macram? couch.
I went to all the big events.
I was at Woodstock.
Oh, yeah?
You went to Woodstock?
Yeah.
Half a million people.
Hey, you know,
if I hadn't been there
there would only have been...
499,999 people.
Lucky thing for them I went.
All of them groovin' on
Hendrix, Sly, Joni, and The Who.
All of us gathered together
in peace and joy.
I'd like to see them try that
with disco.
I did it all.
I wore flowers in my hair...
meditated for hours on end...
chanted...
I was finding God
all over the place.
He kept ditching me.
I marched and protested
against that crummy war.
Is that so?
Pardon me?
Hey, hey, hey, Tony.
No, I got something
to say, Alex.
You know, the only reason
why guys like you
got to stay home, protest,
and get loaded
because guys like me
were over in 'Nam
doing your fighting for you.
What do you say to that?
Thank you.
You're welcome.
But you got to understand
my position.
I thought I was on my way
to Nirvana.
All I ended up with
was recurring flashbacks
of the original Mouseketeers...
hatching out of seedpods.
Boy, time flies.
Yeah.
I'm sleeping with
the lights on tonight.
So, Jim, uh,
take it easy, old man,
and, uh... okay.
Good night, Tony.
ELAINE:
Hey, guys.
Let's get him a job.
BOBBY:
Let's do that.
TONY:
Doing what?
What, are you kidding?
What kind of training
could he possibly have?
None.
What kind of skills
could he possibly have?
None.
What kind of job can
we possibly get him?
Cabdriver.
Cabdriver.
Cabdriver.
ELAINE:
Hey, guys.
Hey. How...? Yeah?
Now I'm telling you, Jim,
you drive in the test
like you just drove now
and you'll do fine.
So, Jim...
you coming along?
Well, I'm a little
confused about something.
Am I coming or going?
Come on,
I'll introduce you
to your future boss,
all right?
Might as well
get this over with, huh?
Hey, Jim,
if you can handle this,
the rest of reality
is a piece of cake, believe me.
LOUIE ( loudly over P.A. ):
Okay, listen up here!
Simpkin, 401.
Petrelli, 622.
Latka, I'm still waiting
on that cab.
I could have built
a new one by now.
I'm getting done, bro.
Excuse me, Louie.
You remember Reverend Jim.
Howdy.
Get him out.
I mean it, Nardo.
Get him out of here.
He's a flake.
All right, come on now, listen.
Losers...
bookings are down this week.
I know guys pulling rickshas
that could do better.
We got to get Louie
to agree to this.
Well, maybe we can get him
on a shift that Louie...
he won't have
to deal with Louie.
ALEX:
Maybe he could start
in another company
and, uh, you know,
once he breaks in...
Hey, what was that?
Uh... what was what?
You just put something
in Louie's coffee.
What was that?
It was either
a tranquilizer
or a Chiclet.
Jim! Jim, that's stupid!
LOUIE:
Hey, Wheeler!
Get your mitts off my cup.
Yeah, but Louie...
Get out of here.
Get your own coffee.
( phone ringing )
LOUIE:
Yeah?
Judy?
Do I sound like Judy to you?
You got the wrong number,
bone-brain.
Where was I?
You were giving them hell,
Louie.
Oh, yeah.
Krubnik, 301!
Try something new tonight,
like making money.
Hendy, 338!
One more ticket,
and you're history.
I guess we can
rule out Chiclets.
Banta?
Yeah, Louie?
Yeah, Lou?
Uh...
Let's see.
901 looks nice.
How you doing, Banta?
Good, Lou.
Thanks.
Good.
Lubna, 831.
Hey, come on, guys.
Let's get cracking here.
Let's get this show
on the road.
Latka...
By golly...
let's get this cab out, huh?
Zoom, zoom.
Okay, Louie.
Come on, boys and girls,
let's roll them out.
* We were sailing along
* On Moonlight Bay
* We could hear
the voices singing *
* They seemed to say
Everybody sing.
* You have stolen my heart
BOTH:
* Now don't go away
* As we sang
love's old sweet song *
* On Moonlight Bay
( harmonizing: )
* On Moonlight Bay.
Well, I think
I'm going to go upstairs
and go to sleep now, Ma.
Good night.
( softly ):
* We were sailing along
* On Moonlight Bay
* We could hear
the voices singing *
* They seemed to say
* You have stolen my heart
* Now don't go 'way
Hey, Louie?
Yeah, Bob?
Hey, is it okay
if Jim comes and works here
as a cab driver?
Sure.
Everybody works
on Moonlight Bay.
* On Moonlight Bay.
Okay...
here we go.
Hey, uh...
give me a little help
on this one.
You forgot
your last name?
I've been busy.
Well, what was
your father's name?
Uh, Ignatowski.
Well, maybe that's
your name, too.
You know,
I think you're right.
Good, good.
"Eyes."
No, don't put two.
Oh. They mean color,
don't they?
Yep.
What color
are my eyes?
Elaine, you want
to take a stab at this one?
Hmm...
well, you can
rule out white.
Call them brown.
Okeydoke.
...W-N.
...W-N.
Uh, let's see.
Uh... "Height."
Oh, about, um...
about five ten?
Oh, good.
Yeah, good.
Not bad. Not bad.
Uh...
Ow.
"Weight."
Weight, uh...
now this is
a very relative question.
I mean, if I were in space
I'd be weightless.
You are in space.
Jim, they mean
Earth weight.
Oh.
Whew.
This is the most reading
I've done in years.
My brown eyes hurt.
Here, here, let me
help you out, okay?
All right.
Phew!
Um... "Have you
ever experienced
"loss of consciousness,
hallucinations,
"dizzy spells,
convulsive disorders,
fainting, or periods
of loss of memory?"
Well, hasn't everyone?
Put "No."
Um... "Mental illness
or narcotic addiction?"
That's a tough choice.
Just put "No."
Okay, that's it.
You're ready
for the test.
I thought this was the test.
No, no, no,
this is the application.
Oh, man!
The day is getting
rougher and rougher.
I'm expecting
the Mouseketeers
any second now.
I'd be just like them.
I think that Cubby's
got it in for me.
Jim, really,
it's going to be okay.
We'll just take your application
up to the counter
and then they'll give you
the test, okay?
Okay.
Do they serve beer
over there?
No.
You're going
to need this.
Yeah.
Oh, boy, oh, boy,
oh, boy, oh, boy.
This is a joke.
What are you
worried about?
What am I worried about?
Two things--
That they won't issue him
a license to drive in this city
and that they will.
ELAINE:
Go get them.
He's going to do it.
I know he's going to do it.
( grunts )
Psst...
What does a yellow light mean?
Slow down.
Okay.
What... does...
a... yellow...
light... mean?
Slow down.
Okay.
What...
does...
a...
...yellow...
light...
mean?
Slow down!
What...
...does...
a...
yellow...
light...
mean?!
I got to admit,
I never thought you'd pass.
The examiner said
I did real well.
I didn't hit hardly anything.
Hey, Jeff?
Yeah?
Give this man a key.
Okay.
And an envelope.
Jim, I'd like to present you
with the keys to Cab 605
and your first envelope.
I never been good at speeches,
but this is one
of the great moments of my life.
I've never felt closer
to a group of people,
not even in the portable johns
at Woodstock.
Thanks, everybody.
Well, uh, I'm off.
Oh, I'd like
to request the honor
of being
your first passenger.
Well, hop in.
Okay.
Well, thank you.
Where are you headed?
Uptown... cabby.
( engine starting )
( tires screeching )
That'll be 90 cents.
( theme music playing )
WOMAN:
Night, Mr. Walters.
( grunts )
Hey...
( laughter )
Drinks for everybody.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
In our little group.
Tony won tonight?
Does this look like
the face of a loser?
Well, in that case,
the first pitcher's on me.
Hey, thanks, Tom.
Oh, that's great.
Oh, boy, did that guy
go down hard.
That sucker hit the canvas
like a sack of cement.
Hey, you know, I'll tell you,
I was worried for a minute.
You never want to see
anybody get hurt, you know.
Ah...
Hey, you really gave it
to him good, huh, Tony?
It was a weird
thing, Tommy.
The guy was climbing
into the ring,
he trips, falls down
and knocks himself cold.
Tony won by default.
You mean,
that's what you're celebrating?
I had to make it
through the same ropes.
That'll be three bucks.
BOBBY:
Hey, look.
There's Reverend Jim.
Oh, yeah.
The guy who performed
Latka's wedding ceremony.
Hey, Reverend Jim!
Hey, how you doing,
buddy?
Fine, fine.
Uh, how you doing?
Oh, great, great.
You, uh, remember us?
Uh, nope.
Jeez, it was nice
chatting with you.
Latka!
Where have you been?
I thought you were
coming to my fight.
( speaking native language )
Latka, Latka, Latka,
calm down.
Go slowly.
All right.
I was going to
go to your fight
but I take the
wrong subway
and I end up in a
place called, uh...
how do you say,
uh, Har... Harlem.
Harlem?
So I went walking
around, uh, lost,
and I go into the bar,
and I tell everyone
I am looking for a fight.
Right.
Uh... did you find one?
Well, lots of people
offered to help.
So... uh, I sit down
and drink with them
and you know,
they make mistake.
They think I am
their brother.
( snickers )
So... so they teach
me word... new words
and lots of songs, and
we all have a good time.
Mm-hmm.
So how was your fight?
I won!
Oh, you are a bad dude.
Sit down, Latka.
When are they going to clean
those bathrooms?
You were in the kitchen.
Thank goodness.
Wait a minute--
you marry me.
Uh, believe me,
it would never work out.
No, no, no, no.
You performed
the wedding ceremony.
Yeah, yeah.
Don't you remember?
Eight months ago,
Latka had to get married
to stay in the country.
You performed the ceremony
at the Sunshine Garage.
( speaking
native language )
Oh, yeah.
I thought I dreamed that.
Maybe I'm dreaming this.
Hey, Tommy, how about
another glass, okay?
TOMMY:
You're up.
So how's the
Church of the Peaceful doing?
Not so good.
After the draft ended,
I lost my flock.
Well, have you performed
any other wedding ceremonies?
Let's see, I, uh...
married two people
stark naked in the woods.
You mean the whole
wedding party was nude?
No, just me.
They, uh...
...changed their minds
at the last minute
and forgot to tell me.
Thanks for the beer.
Yeah.
Well,
we'll see you around.
Oh, boy.
Oh, the poor guy.
You know, in-in my country
we have an expression:
( speaking native language )
What does it mean?
Uh... "Poor guy."
You know, call me crazy,
but I happen to
like the guy.
and I'm going to go
see how he's doing.
You're crazy.
You're crazy,
crazy.
( all chuckling )
Hey, uh, Jim.
Yo!
Listen, my friends and I,
we were wondering
if you'd like to come over
and join us.
Well, what did
you decide?
Well, we-we, uh...
we thought
that-that you might like to?
Okeydoke.
Of course,
I can only stay for five or six.
ELAINE:
So how you doing, Jim?
Fine, fine.
Uh, who are you
folks again?
You marry me.
In the garage.
Oh, yeah.
( imitating Latka's language )
Jim, uh,
would you mind
if I asked you a
personal question?
Well, I can take it,
if you can.
No, no, no, not
that personal.
Um, did you ever think
about doing something
with your life?
You know, like
getting a job?
As a matter of fact,
I have.
I've often thought
I'd make a good pharmacist.
A pharmacist?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, well, if you're
serious then
you have to go to school,
take a lot of chemistry...
Oh, I've taken
a lot of chemistry.
You know, this has been
a very long day for me
so I must
boogie on home now.
Boogie down,
Latka.
Boogie down.
Okay. Good-bye.
Thanks for
dropping by.
See you.
* Get on up
* Get on the scene
* I feel like a sex machine.
Last call.
I got to close it up.
Hey, Tom,
another round.
Hey, uh...
will you guys let me buy?
Yeah!
Sure!
Why not?
Any of this currency?
Next time.
Yeah, I know.
I'll get it.
Jim, I guess what
we're trying to say
is that we'd
like to help you.
ALEX:
Hey, Elaine, would
you leave him alone?
He's not asking anything
from anybody.
Besides, it's not like our lives
are in such great shape.
Yeah, but I just can't believe
he's happy this way.
You know,
getting high all the time.
Hey... no. Everything I take
is by doctor's prescription--
everything.
Though finding the right doctor
can be difficult.
Jim, please
don't be offended
by what I'm about to say,
but don't you ever feel
like you're wasting
your life?
Me? No, no.
I have function in life.
I-I stand for something.
Not everybody stands
for something, but I do.
I am the living embodiment
of the '60s.
Everything that came along,
I went with.
Even if I didn't know
what it was, I went with it.
I did some drugs...
not nearly so many
as you probably think I did.
How many drugs
do you think I did?
Mmm... a lot.
Wow! Right on the nose!
But I did a lot
of all the other stuff, too.
I spent a year of my life
making a macram? couch.
I went to all the big events.
I was at Woodstock.
Oh, yeah?
You went to Woodstock?
Yeah.
Half a million people.
Hey, you know,
if I hadn't been there
there would only have been...
499,999 people.
Lucky thing for them I went.
All of them groovin' on
Hendrix, Sly, Joni, and The Who.
All of us gathered together
in peace and joy.
I'd like to see them try that
with disco.
I did it all.
I wore flowers in my hair...
meditated for hours on end...
chanted...
I was finding God
all over the place.
He kept ditching me.
I marched and protested
against that crummy war.
Is that so?
Pardon me?
Hey, hey, hey, Tony.
No, I got something
to say, Alex.
You know, the only reason
why guys like you
got to stay home, protest,
and get loaded
because guys like me
were over in 'Nam
doing your fighting for you.
What do you say to that?
Thank you.
You're welcome.
But you got to understand
my position.
I thought I was on my way
to Nirvana.
All I ended up with
was recurring flashbacks
of the original Mouseketeers...
hatching out of seedpods.
Boy, time flies.
Yeah.
I'm sleeping with
the lights on tonight.
So, Jim, uh,
take it easy, old man,
and, uh... okay.
Good night, Tony.
ELAINE:
Hey, guys.
Let's get him a job.
BOBBY:
Let's do that.
TONY:
Doing what?
What, are you kidding?
What kind of training
could he possibly have?
None.
What kind of skills
could he possibly have?
None.
What kind of job can
we possibly get him?
Cabdriver.
Cabdriver.
Cabdriver.
ELAINE:
Hey, guys.
Hey. How...? Yeah?
Now I'm telling you, Jim,
you drive in the test
like you just drove now
and you'll do fine.
So, Jim...
you coming along?
Well, I'm a little
confused about something.
Am I coming or going?
Come on,
I'll introduce you
to your future boss,
all right?
Might as well
get this over with, huh?
Hey, Jim,
if you can handle this,
the rest of reality
is a piece of cake, believe me.
LOUIE ( loudly over P.A. ):
Okay, listen up here!
Simpkin, 401.
Petrelli, 622.
Latka, I'm still waiting
on that cab.
I could have built
a new one by now.
I'm getting done, bro.
Excuse me, Louie.
You remember Reverend Jim.
Howdy.
Get him out.
I mean it, Nardo.
Get him out of here.
He's a flake.
All right, come on now, listen.
Losers...
bookings are down this week.
I know guys pulling rickshas
that could do better.
We got to get Louie
to agree to this.
Well, maybe we can get him
on a shift that Louie...
he won't have
to deal with Louie.
ALEX:
Maybe he could start
in another company
and, uh, you know,
once he breaks in...
Hey, what was that?
Uh... what was what?
You just put something
in Louie's coffee.
What was that?
It was either
a tranquilizer
or a Chiclet.
Jim! Jim, that's stupid!
LOUIE:
Hey, Wheeler!
Get your mitts off my cup.
Yeah, but Louie...
Get out of here.
Get your own coffee.
( phone ringing )
LOUIE:
Yeah?
Judy?
Do I sound like Judy to you?
You got the wrong number,
bone-brain.
Where was I?
You were giving them hell,
Louie.
Oh, yeah.
Krubnik, 301!
Try something new tonight,
like making money.
Hendy, 338!
One more ticket,
and you're history.
I guess we can
rule out Chiclets.
Banta?
Yeah, Louie?
Yeah, Lou?
Uh...
Let's see.
901 looks nice.
How you doing, Banta?
Good, Lou.
Thanks.
Good.
Lubna, 831.
Hey, come on, guys.
Let's get cracking here.
Let's get this show
on the road.
Latka...
By golly...
let's get this cab out, huh?
Zoom, zoom.
Okay, Louie.
Come on, boys and girls,
let's roll them out.
* We were sailing along
* On Moonlight Bay
* We could hear
the voices singing *
* They seemed to say
Everybody sing.
* You have stolen my heart
BOTH:
* Now don't go away
* As we sang
love's old sweet song *
* On Moonlight Bay
( harmonizing: )
* On Moonlight Bay.
Well, I think
I'm going to go upstairs
and go to sleep now, Ma.
Good night.
( softly ):
* We were sailing along
* On Moonlight Bay
* We could hear
the voices singing *
* They seemed to say
* You have stolen my heart
* Now don't go 'way
Hey, Louie?
Yeah, Bob?
Hey, is it okay
if Jim comes and works here
as a cab driver?
Sure.
Everybody works
on Moonlight Bay.
* On Moonlight Bay.
Okay...
here we go.
Hey, uh...
give me a little help
on this one.
You forgot
your last name?
I've been busy.
Well, what was
your father's name?
Uh, Ignatowski.
Well, maybe that's
your name, too.
You know,
I think you're right.
Good, good.
"Eyes."
No, don't put two.
Oh. They mean color,
don't they?
Yep.
What color
are my eyes?
Elaine, you want
to take a stab at this one?
Hmm...
well, you can
rule out white.
Call them brown.
Okeydoke.
...W-N.
...W-N.
Uh, let's see.
Uh... "Height."
Oh, about, um...
about five ten?
Oh, good.
Yeah, good.
Not bad. Not bad.
Uh...
Ow.
"Weight."
Weight, uh...
now this is
a very relative question.
I mean, if I were in space
I'd be weightless.
You are in space.
Jim, they mean
Earth weight.
Oh.
Whew.
This is the most reading
I've done in years.
My brown eyes hurt.
Here, here, let me
help you out, okay?
All right.
Phew!
Um... "Have you
ever experienced
"loss of consciousness,
hallucinations,
"dizzy spells,
convulsive disorders,
fainting, or periods
of loss of memory?"
Well, hasn't everyone?
Put "No."
Um... "Mental illness
or narcotic addiction?"
That's a tough choice.
Just put "No."
Okay, that's it.
You're ready
for the test.
I thought this was the test.
No, no, no,
this is the application.
Oh, man!
The day is getting
rougher and rougher.
I'm expecting
the Mouseketeers
any second now.
I'd be just like them.
I think that Cubby's
got it in for me.
Jim, really,
it's going to be okay.
We'll just take your application
up to the counter
and then they'll give you
the test, okay?
Okay.
Do they serve beer
over there?
No.
You're going
to need this.
Yeah.
Oh, boy, oh, boy,
oh, boy, oh, boy.
This is a joke.
What are you
worried about?
What am I worried about?
Two things--
That they won't issue him
a license to drive in this city
and that they will.
ELAINE:
Go get them.
He's going to do it.
I know he's going to do it.
( grunts )
Psst...
What does a yellow light mean?
Slow down.
Okay.
What... does...
a... yellow...
light... mean?
Slow down.
Okay.
What...
does...
a...
...yellow...
light...
mean?
Slow down!
What...
...does...
a...
yellow...
light...
mean?!
I got to admit,
I never thought you'd pass.
The examiner said
I did real well.
I didn't hit hardly anything.
Hey, Jeff?
Yeah?
Give this man a key.
Okay.
And an envelope.
Jim, I'd like to present you
with the keys to Cab 605
and your first envelope.
I never been good at speeches,
but this is one
of the great moments of my life.
I've never felt closer
to a group of people,
not even in the portable johns
at Woodstock.
Thanks, everybody.
Well, uh, I'm off.
Oh, I'd like
to request the honor
of being
your first passenger.
Well, hop in.
Okay.
Well, thank you.
Where are you headed?
Uptown... cabby.
( engine starting )
( tires screeching )
That'll be 90 cents.
( theme music playing )
WOMAN:
Night, Mr. Walters.
( grunts )