Taxi (1978–1983): Season 1, Episode 12 - Memories of Cab 804: Part 2 - full transcript
In part two the gang continues to reminisce about their experiences in cab 804 while Latka comes closer to getting it fixed. Alex recalls a couple that got into his cab,the wife was pregnant & went in to labor and Alex had to help deliver it in the back seat. Elaine picks up a charming wealthy man and drives him out to the country,who asks her to spend the night with him but she can't bring herself to do it. He understands but still gave her kiss goodnight and a generous tip.
A much too fast recap
of last week's Taxi.
Louie got this phone call.
John had wrecked cab 804.
804?
I was in 804
the night I got held up.
Remember
when I started carrying
that big gun around
for protection?
Just want the fare money, son.
No games.
Okay, drop it!
Drop it?
Hey, man.
You ain't no fun
to stick up, man.
Hey, I saved a guy's life
once in 804.
Hey, don't do that!
Okay.
Hey, maybe we're all
getting upset for nothing.
I mean, we don't know for sure
that 804 is totaled.
JOHN:
Hi, everybody.
Hey, everything's all right.
I'm fine.
Just look at
that grillwork.
I can't look
at her anymore.
Well, we'll know soon enough.
804 is about to go
under the wrench.
It's going to take
a miracle to save her.
I wish it was me that was going
under the wrench.
Oh, John...
Come on. Don't
feel so bad.
It was just
an accident.
It could happen
to any of us.
Right?
Either of us.
( speaking native language )
TONY:
Latka! Latka!
How you doing?
We're counting
on you, Latka.
Take as much time
as you need.
As much time
as you need, right?
We know you can do it, buddy.
I still say we should have
got a specialist.
ALEX:
No, Latka'll do fine.
He's our man.
Hey, if he can't fix it,
nobody can.
Wait till he sees the cab.
Eh, trust.
No need for specialist.
I can fix it.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I quit.
Latka, no!
Come on. You got
to go get 'em, boy.
Yeah, Latka,
do your best.
Please,
Latka, please!
Save her, will you,
please?
( speaking native language )
...Genius!
( still speaking
native language )
Hey, let's forget about this.
I mean, I feel just as bad
as any of you
but standing around like this
isn't going to help.
( sighing )
You want to hear
a story
about what happened
to me in 804?
Yeah.
Well, it's just about this guy
I picked up one night...
What's wrong?
I thought when it came
to passengers, you never, uh...
No, I don't.
Well... well, I mean,
you got to understand.
I mean, this was special.
You know, there are just
certain things in life
that a girl can't resist.
ALEX:
Like what?
Well, like an auction.
I mean, I hear about an auction
and I go crazy, you know?
Or a ride in the country.
I mean, I love
a ride in the country.
Oh, and nice manners.
I adore nice manners.
Elaine, what's this got to do
with the guy you picked up?
Well...
MAN:
Excuse me, I've got
to get to a private
auction in the country.
Is it possible for you
to take me?
I know it's
a lot to ask.
I get off duty
in half an hour.
How far is it?
140 Miles.
Oh, I don't know. 140...
I can make it.
Uh, this is cab 804.
I'm going to be
a little late.
I have
an out-of-town fare.
LOUIE:
Good. How late will you be?
Don't wait up.
Elaine Nardo, huh?
It's a good picture.
Come on.
It's a terrible picture.
My hair wasn't fixed
and my eyes
are half-closed...
It's a mug shot.
Listen, maybe everybody
asks you this,
but how come
you're driving a cab?
There was this fat lady once.
Four suitcases
and three kids.
I drove her all the way
to New Jersey.
The kids were hanging out
the windows,
and she was screaming
at the kids to get back inside.
Two of the kids even
got sick in the car.
I don't get it.
She's the only one
who never asked me
why I drive a cab.
Okay. You don't
have to tell me.
I only tell
special people.
The reason I drive a cab
is because I'm divorced
and I need the extra money.
I really work
as a receptionist
at an art gallery.
That gallery is what
I really care about.
Uh, listen, the auction
that I'm going to
is an art auction.
Would you like
to join me?
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean
that as a come-on.
No, that's not true.
I did mean that
as a come-on.
Would you?
Oh, I don't know.
I... I couldn't date a
guy that I didn't know.
What's your name anyway?
Mike Beldon.
Certainly good to know
you, Mike Beldon.
Mike Beldon, Mike Beldon.
I own a few paintings
myself,
but mostly I just buy
for other people.
I'm still at the
renting stage.
I get them from
libraries, you know.
Just having them
around the house,
you know, changes the
whole atmosphere for me.
This isn't like me.
What isn't?
I'm still not comfortable
about having a passenger
ride up front.
Passenger?
I thought we were friends.
( sighing )
We shouldn't be doing this.
Why not?
What are you afraid of?
You know what I mean.
It's like, you know,
here we are,
sharing the same
experiences,
the same interests...
( sighing )
Sort of maybe...
feeling a little attracted
to each other?
Maybe a little.
Maybe a lot?
Maybe a lot.
Good.
But it's too
perfect, you know?
Yeah, we should stop.
Something's going
to go wrong.
What are you
talking about?
I mean, like, I just know
it's going to turn out
you're either married,
gay, or crazy.
( sighing )
I hit it, didn't I?
You're one of those?
Married, gay, or crazy?
Yeah, you're right.
Come on, crazy.
Right again.
Thank God.
So we got divorced.
I wanted kids,
she didn't.
Simple as that.
I don't know.
Maybe I was wrong.
Maybe I'm just
too old-fashioned,
but, uh... I still
believe in families.
How about you?
What is it, a tattoo somewhere
that says, "I have kids"?
You knew that.
See? You are too perfect.
ELAINE:
Why are we stopping?
We're here.
Oh, you're kidding.
140 miles goes
that fast, huh?
Listen...
There's something
I got to ask you.
Great.
It would seem real strange
if I had to say good-bye
to you right now.
So, would you
spend the night
with me tonight?
Believe me, I...
I wouldn't rush
it like this,
but I don't think
I'm going to get
another chance.
So, would you spend
the night with me?
You mean all night?
I'm not being naive.
I just want to make sure
that I understand you.
All night.
You mean in the same room?
Not naive.
I'm just checking.
Same room.
Do you mean
just for tonight?
( sighing )
I have to fly to London
in the morning.
What about when you come back?
I don't know
when I'm coming back,
and I'd hate
to make a promise
I couldn't keep.
( sighing )
You're not so perfect.
You don't even know
when to lie.
What about tonight?
I can't...
Unless there's even
the slightest chance
that you might not go
to London tomorrow.
Okay, there's
a slight chance.
Yeah?
No, that's a lie.
Now, see, you happy? I'm a liar.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, I am really sorry.
I'm furious at myself
is what I am.
I understand.
So long.
( sighing )
A kiss we can do.
What was
that question again?
( laughing )
Oh, you're sure going
to get remembered, fella.
Uh, hey... listen,
I owe you some money here.
That's right.
Thanks.
( sighing )
Here, take this.
A hundred dollars?
No, please take it.
Oh, wait, I can't!
Please?
I'd feel like a call girl.
You didn't do anything.
I'd feel like a bad call girl.
I want you
to have it.
I mean, think of it
as a down payment
on your art gallery.
You deserve it.
It's the best cab
ride I ever had.
Oh.
Oh, this is some tip.
What would you have given me
if I'd stayed the night?
A very sweet memory.
LOUIE:
You're better off
with the hundred.
Louie! Oh, Louie..!
Oh, I don't believe it!
Louie, what are
you doing?!
I don't believe it!
Louie, you creep!
You know, this creep
has nothing to do
than to interfere
with other people's lives.
I hate you!
Oh, I am so embarrassed.
I am so sorry.
I had no idea.
I'll kill you!
I'm sorry.
I believe you.
Good night.
Oh, good night.
Good old 804.
Well, he sounds like
he was some kind
of great guy.
No, you did
the right thing.
The guy had to have
a big flaw somewhere.
He did.
He took no for an answer.
It's your turn.
What, for a story?
Oh, come on.
I don't have any good ones.
I mean, it's just
the usual stuff, you know.
Well, one time I had
this contortionist
who insisted
on riding in the trunk.
I had a woman one time
with a head of lettuce
she said was alive,
and she wanted me
to ask it questions.
I mean, you know, usual stuff.
Nothing unusual, huh?
Well, there was this one time
in 804,
but it was
no big deal, actually.
I'll bet you this guy's got
the best story of them all.
You bet.
It helps to get
it off your chest.
Right. It goes like this.
Well, it was a miserable night.
It had just been snowing, and
my bookings were real light,
when I see this guy...
Taxi!
Hi there.
Methodist Hospital.
It's not an emergency,
or anything, is it?
No. We're having a baby,
but no need to panic.
Everything's cool.
Who's we?
Just a minute.
Don't start the meter.
You okay?
Uh-huh.
Okay. Okay.
You were right behind me
on the stairs.
What happened?
What happened?
I lost you when you
started taking two at a time.
Hello.
You can start the meter now.
Don't drive too fast.
We got plenty of time.
Are you sure?
Yeah, we're going natural.
We've had
the Lamaze classes.
We know exactly
what we're doing.
Going natural is so great
because ou know ahead of time
what's going to happen.
You don't have
to worry anyway.
With my pelvis, the doctor says
I'm gonna drop 'em like kittens.
My mother was like that.
Even my grandmother
dropped 'em like kittens.
My great-grandmother...
Dropped 'em
like kittens?
That's enough.
She may be a little nervous.
It's okay, that's why I'm
here to keep her calm.
I made you a great
peanut butter...
Oh, oh. Here comes
another one. Start timing.
Huh?
Start timing her
labor contractions.
The length of the contraction
and how often they occur
lets you know exactly which
stage of the labor she's in.
She's just in
the latter part
of the first phase
of the first stage
because the contractions are
way, way apart,
lasting about 20 seconds.
Later on they'll maybe...
They'll be maybe
three minutes or so apart
and last about 60 seconds.
Ultimately, the last
couple of minutes
will be one
right after the other.
That's the third and final phase
of the first stage.
It's pretty fascinating,
isn't it?
Yeah, I guess so.
I'm her coach.
I give all the directions.
It keeps her mind focused
away from the pain that way.
Coach, huh?
Yeah, that's the name
they give us.
I've got the sack here, bag.
I've got a rolling pin
and tennis ball for back pain
in case she needs a back rub.
I got some candy
in case I get hungry.
I do the breathing too
right along with her.
We share everything.
This way she doesn't feel
like she's having
the baby alone.
Hey, listen,
why don't you relax?
Sit back there
and have some candy.
Oh, no, thanks.
I'm not hungry.
Maybe when I get to the...
Stop.
Me?
She means me.
I stop timing
the contraction.
It's over now. I check to see
how long it lasted--
minute and ten seconds--
make a note of it.
Pencil, pencil... may I?
Oh, sure.
Here.
Huh?
Oh, thanks.
A minute and ten seconds?
In phase one?
Here comes another one.
You just had one.
Well, I'm having another one.
That's phase three. What
happened to phase two? Stop.
I can't.
Not you, him!
Stop the cab!
What for?
We skipped phase two,
we're too late.
We're too late?
Oh, my gosh. She's having
the baby right here.
She's still contracting.
This is it, this is the baby.
Hey, hey, listen, I thought you
were supposed to stay calm?
I thought we were supposed
to have three phases,
and look,
she's still contracting.
This is it,
this is the baby.
All right, now, try
to stay calm now.
You want me to
get a doctor?
No, don't talk to me,
I feel sick.
What?!
Faint. I feel faint.
Do your breathing.
I can't.
I feel nauseous.
Help him, please!
Get him in the front seat.
Well, what
about you?!
I'm sorry, I feel...
I got to get air.
Here comes another one.
Keep... Breathe, breathe.
Where did he go?
Hey, mister!
Please, lady,
look give me a break.
( screaming )
Hey, what about her?
You'll have to take over.
Me?!
Listen, no sweat. I can
coach you from here
on how to coach her
back there.
Hey, come on!
No kidding around.
You've got to go
through with this.
Hey, come on, come on.
Shape up, fella, will you?
This happens to some men.
Please don't blame him for it.
Don't make him
feel inferior.
Listen, lady, I'm a stranger.
You don't want me.
You want him.
She was the star pupil
in her class.
She'll take coaching
from anybody.
Hey, where are you going?!
Come here!
What are you doing?
( breathing quickly )
Here, watch me-- like this.
Coach her, coach her,
don't let her coach you.
He's right, he's right.
Don't worry
about how I am.
Make sure
she follows you.
Make sure she
follows you.
You're the boss,
remember.
Have you got something
to catch the baby?
Huh?
Use your coat.
Make sure
she's relaxed.
Don't let her muscles
tense up.
Hold her hand.
You can't hold my hand,
I need my hand.
I can't hold her hand,
she needs her hand.
Forget her hand.
Hey! What are you doing?
Getting into position.
It's coming.
I can feel it.
Make sure she's at
a 45-degree angle.
To what?! To what?!
Are you pushing yet?
I didn't know
I was supposed to push.
I'm not talking to you.
Oh.
Push. Are you pushing?
( straining ):
I'm pushing!
What's he doing?
He's doing fine.
What's wrong?
What's wrong?
Isn't she concentrating?
How should I know?
Why don't you call a doctor.
Use the radio, will you?
Are you all right?
All right, I got it.
Here, you talk.
Oh, my God.
Louie! Alex. Cab 804.
Listen, you got trouble here.
A lady's having a baby.
LOUIE:
I never saw her before.
No, Louie, Louie! Louie!
We're on 61st Street between
Second and Third Avenues.
Get a doctor quick,
will you, please?
It's coming.
Oh, my God.
Keep breathing!
Keep pushing!
Push.
You'll be all right.
You'll be all right.
Just take it easy.
Just relax.
Allen, watch. It's coming.
I can feel it.
I can't.
Huh?
Allen! Look!
I can't look.
I'm going to remember this.
You let a stranger
deliver our baby.
I'll never marry you now.
Ruth, don't...
Ruth, please, don't be mad.
I can't help it.
Yeah, come on, Ruth,
this is no time to argue.
Marry him
if he wants to marry you.
Marry a man who won't even
look at our baby?
All right, all right. I'll look.
But what if I pass out?
Oh, God.
Look at that.
ALEX:
Now, take it easy.
I got it.
Watch the shoulders, now.
Careful.
Ruth, it's so beautiful.
Easy now.
Easy.
You're almost home free.
Ruth, it's a boy.
It's a boy.
Yeah. A boy.
( baby crying )
Wrap him up.
Don't cut
the umbilical cord.
Lay him on top of Ruth.
He'll stay warm there.
Allen, look.
Hey... I'm a father.
Ruth, I love you.
I love you too.
Hey, Congratulations.
Hey, Mister, really...
I don't know how
to thank you
for all this.
Aw...
We don't have a name
for him yet. What's your name?
Alex.
Maybe we'll just get you
a bottle of scotch.
Hi.
Hey, Bob,
what's happening?
Any word on 804 yet?
They took it upstairs.
They're still going
to work on it.
Well... Latka!
Just tell me.
How's it going?
Yeah, how's
the car, man?
Ladies and gentlemen,
I now present to you
cab 804.
ALEX:
Latka!
The man's a genius,
a genius.
Thank you very much.
Hey, can I be
the first to drive it?
Hey, wait a minute! I want
to be the first to drive it.
I saved a guy's life
in this car.
Hey, I saved my own
life in this car!
I met my dream man
in this car.
Now, hold it, hold it.
Now just hold it!
I know you all have good reasons
to want this car,
but I think I got you all beat.
I brought
a beautiful human being
into the world in this cab.
When a man is right,
a man is right.
Well, thank you, Louie.
Thanks.
Oh, Alex?
Yes, Latka?
One thing--
Be careful of steering.
You know, sometimes
you turn... go this way
when the car,
it go this way.
Okay.
Oh, and also...
Yes?
Brakes are
really good now
except when it's wet
or very dry.
Leave it to me.
Okay.
Oh, and one...
also, Alex.
Be sure don't go over
25 mile per hours
because if you do,
transmission...
Don't worry
about it, Latka.
Okay. See you later.
Okay.
See you, Alex.
( engine sputters
and backfires )
Hey, Alex!
TONY:
It's burning!
JOHN:
Turn it off!
BOBBY:
Alex!
On reflection, I think
I delivered that baby in 803.
Hey, guys.
I think I made a mistake.
It wasn't this cab at all.
( theme music playing )
WOMAN:
Night, Mr. Walters.
( grunts )
of last week's Taxi.
Louie got this phone call.
John had wrecked cab 804.
804?
I was in 804
the night I got held up.
Remember
when I started carrying
that big gun around
for protection?
Just want the fare money, son.
No games.
Okay, drop it!
Drop it?
Hey, man.
You ain't no fun
to stick up, man.
Hey, I saved a guy's life
once in 804.
Hey, don't do that!
Okay.
Hey, maybe we're all
getting upset for nothing.
I mean, we don't know for sure
that 804 is totaled.
JOHN:
Hi, everybody.
Hey, everything's all right.
I'm fine.
Just look at
that grillwork.
I can't look
at her anymore.
Well, we'll know soon enough.
804 is about to go
under the wrench.
It's going to take
a miracle to save her.
I wish it was me that was going
under the wrench.
Oh, John...
Come on. Don't
feel so bad.
It was just
an accident.
It could happen
to any of us.
Right?
Either of us.
( speaking native language )
TONY:
Latka! Latka!
How you doing?
We're counting
on you, Latka.
Take as much time
as you need.
As much time
as you need, right?
We know you can do it, buddy.
I still say we should have
got a specialist.
ALEX:
No, Latka'll do fine.
He's our man.
Hey, if he can't fix it,
nobody can.
Wait till he sees the cab.
Eh, trust.
No need for specialist.
I can fix it.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I quit.
Latka, no!
Come on. You got
to go get 'em, boy.
Yeah, Latka,
do your best.
Please,
Latka, please!
Save her, will you,
please?
( speaking native language )
...Genius!
( still speaking
native language )
Hey, let's forget about this.
I mean, I feel just as bad
as any of you
but standing around like this
isn't going to help.
( sighing )
You want to hear
a story
about what happened
to me in 804?
Yeah.
Well, it's just about this guy
I picked up one night...
What's wrong?
I thought when it came
to passengers, you never, uh...
No, I don't.
Well... well, I mean,
you got to understand.
I mean, this was special.
You know, there are just
certain things in life
that a girl can't resist.
ALEX:
Like what?
Well, like an auction.
I mean, I hear about an auction
and I go crazy, you know?
Or a ride in the country.
I mean, I love
a ride in the country.
Oh, and nice manners.
I adore nice manners.
Elaine, what's this got to do
with the guy you picked up?
Well...
MAN:
Excuse me, I've got
to get to a private
auction in the country.
Is it possible for you
to take me?
I know it's
a lot to ask.
I get off duty
in half an hour.
How far is it?
140 Miles.
Oh, I don't know. 140...
I can make it.
Uh, this is cab 804.
I'm going to be
a little late.
I have
an out-of-town fare.
LOUIE:
Good. How late will you be?
Don't wait up.
Elaine Nardo, huh?
It's a good picture.
Come on.
It's a terrible picture.
My hair wasn't fixed
and my eyes
are half-closed...
It's a mug shot.
Listen, maybe everybody
asks you this,
but how come
you're driving a cab?
There was this fat lady once.
Four suitcases
and three kids.
I drove her all the way
to New Jersey.
The kids were hanging out
the windows,
and she was screaming
at the kids to get back inside.
Two of the kids even
got sick in the car.
I don't get it.
She's the only one
who never asked me
why I drive a cab.
Okay. You don't
have to tell me.
I only tell
special people.
The reason I drive a cab
is because I'm divorced
and I need the extra money.
I really work
as a receptionist
at an art gallery.
That gallery is what
I really care about.
Uh, listen, the auction
that I'm going to
is an art auction.
Would you like
to join me?
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean
that as a come-on.
No, that's not true.
I did mean that
as a come-on.
Would you?
Oh, I don't know.
I... I couldn't date a
guy that I didn't know.
What's your name anyway?
Mike Beldon.
Certainly good to know
you, Mike Beldon.
Mike Beldon, Mike Beldon.
I own a few paintings
myself,
but mostly I just buy
for other people.
I'm still at the
renting stage.
I get them from
libraries, you know.
Just having them
around the house,
you know, changes the
whole atmosphere for me.
This isn't like me.
What isn't?
I'm still not comfortable
about having a passenger
ride up front.
Passenger?
I thought we were friends.
( sighing )
We shouldn't be doing this.
Why not?
What are you afraid of?
You know what I mean.
It's like, you know,
here we are,
sharing the same
experiences,
the same interests...
( sighing )
Sort of maybe...
feeling a little attracted
to each other?
Maybe a little.
Maybe a lot?
Maybe a lot.
Good.
But it's too
perfect, you know?
Yeah, we should stop.
Something's going
to go wrong.
What are you
talking about?
I mean, like, I just know
it's going to turn out
you're either married,
gay, or crazy.
( sighing )
I hit it, didn't I?
You're one of those?
Married, gay, or crazy?
Yeah, you're right.
Come on, crazy.
Right again.
Thank God.
So we got divorced.
I wanted kids,
she didn't.
Simple as that.
I don't know.
Maybe I was wrong.
Maybe I'm just
too old-fashioned,
but, uh... I still
believe in families.
How about you?
What is it, a tattoo somewhere
that says, "I have kids"?
You knew that.
See? You are too perfect.
ELAINE:
Why are we stopping?
We're here.
Oh, you're kidding.
140 miles goes
that fast, huh?
Listen...
There's something
I got to ask you.
Great.
It would seem real strange
if I had to say good-bye
to you right now.
So, would you
spend the night
with me tonight?
Believe me, I...
I wouldn't rush
it like this,
but I don't think
I'm going to get
another chance.
So, would you spend
the night with me?
You mean all night?
I'm not being naive.
I just want to make sure
that I understand you.
All night.
You mean in the same room?
Not naive.
I'm just checking.
Same room.
Do you mean
just for tonight?
( sighing )
I have to fly to London
in the morning.
What about when you come back?
I don't know
when I'm coming back,
and I'd hate
to make a promise
I couldn't keep.
( sighing )
You're not so perfect.
You don't even know
when to lie.
What about tonight?
I can't...
Unless there's even
the slightest chance
that you might not go
to London tomorrow.
Okay, there's
a slight chance.
Yeah?
No, that's a lie.
Now, see, you happy? I'm a liar.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, I am really sorry.
I'm furious at myself
is what I am.
I understand.
So long.
( sighing )
A kiss we can do.
What was
that question again?
( laughing )
Oh, you're sure going
to get remembered, fella.
Uh, hey... listen,
I owe you some money here.
That's right.
Thanks.
( sighing )
Here, take this.
A hundred dollars?
No, please take it.
Oh, wait, I can't!
Please?
I'd feel like a call girl.
You didn't do anything.
I'd feel like a bad call girl.
I want you
to have it.
I mean, think of it
as a down payment
on your art gallery.
You deserve it.
It's the best cab
ride I ever had.
Oh.
Oh, this is some tip.
What would you have given me
if I'd stayed the night?
A very sweet memory.
LOUIE:
You're better off
with the hundred.
Louie! Oh, Louie..!
Oh, I don't believe it!
Louie, what are
you doing?!
I don't believe it!
Louie, you creep!
You know, this creep
has nothing to do
than to interfere
with other people's lives.
I hate you!
Oh, I am so embarrassed.
I am so sorry.
I had no idea.
I'll kill you!
I'm sorry.
I believe you.
Good night.
Oh, good night.
Good old 804.
Well, he sounds like
he was some kind
of great guy.
No, you did
the right thing.
The guy had to have
a big flaw somewhere.
He did.
He took no for an answer.
It's your turn.
What, for a story?
Oh, come on.
I don't have any good ones.
I mean, it's just
the usual stuff, you know.
Well, one time I had
this contortionist
who insisted
on riding in the trunk.
I had a woman one time
with a head of lettuce
she said was alive,
and she wanted me
to ask it questions.
I mean, you know, usual stuff.
Nothing unusual, huh?
Well, there was this one time
in 804,
but it was
no big deal, actually.
I'll bet you this guy's got
the best story of them all.
You bet.
It helps to get
it off your chest.
Right. It goes like this.
Well, it was a miserable night.
It had just been snowing, and
my bookings were real light,
when I see this guy...
Taxi!
Hi there.
Methodist Hospital.
It's not an emergency,
or anything, is it?
No. We're having a baby,
but no need to panic.
Everything's cool.
Who's we?
Just a minute.
Don't start the meter.
You okay?
Uh-huh.
Okay. Okay.
You were right behind me
on the stairs.
What happened?
What happened?
I lost you when you
started taking two at a time.
Hello.
You can start the meter now.
Don't drive too fast.
We got plenty of time.
Are you sure?
Yeah, we're going natural.
We've had
the Lamaze classes.
We know exactly
what we're doing.
Going natural is so great
because ou know ahead of time
what's going to happen.
You don't have
to worry anyway.
With my pelvis, the doctor says
I'm gonna drop 'em like kittens.
My mother was like that.
Even my grandmother
dropped 'em like kittens.
My great-grandmother...
Dropped 'em
like kittens?
That's enough.
She may be a little nervous.
It's okay, that's why I'm
here to keep her calm.
I made you a great
peanut butter...
Oh, oh. Here comes
another one. Start timing.
Huh?
Start timing her
labor contractions.
The length of the contraction
and how often they occur
lets you know exactly which
stage of the labor she's in.
She's just in
the latter part
of the first phase
of the first stage
because the contractions are
way, way apart,
lasting about 20 seconds.
Later on they'll maybe...
They'll be maybe
three minutes or so apart
and last about 60 seconds.
Ultimately, the last
couple of minutes
will be one
right after the other.
That's the third and final phase
of the first stage.
It's pretty fascinating,
isn't it?
Yeah, I guess so.
I'm her coach.
I give all the directions.
It keeps her mind focused
away from the pain that way.
Coach, huh?
Yeah, that's the name
they give us.
I've got the sack here, bag.
I've got a rolling pin
and tennis ball for back pain
in case she needs a back rub.
I got some candy
in case I get hungry.
I do the breathing too
right along with her.
We share everything.
This way she doesn't feel
like she's having
the baby alone.
Hey, listen,
why don't you relax?
Sit back there
and have some candy.
Oh, no, thanks.
I'm not hungry.
Maybe when I get to the...
Stop.
Me?
She means me.
I stop timing
the contraction.
It's over now. I check to see
how long it lasted--
minute and ten seconds--
make a note of it.
Pencil, pencil... may I?
Oh, sure.
Here.
Huh?
Oh, thanks.
A minute and ten seconds?
In phase one?
Here comes another one.
You just had one.
Well, I'm having another one.
That's phase three. What
happened to phase two? Stop.
I can't.
Not you, him!
Stop the cab!
What for?
We skipped phase two,
we're too late.
We're too late?
Oh, my gosh. She's having
the baby right here.
She's still contracting.
This is it, this is the baby.
Hey, hey, listen, I thought you
were supposed to stay calm?
I thought we were supposed
to have three phases,
and look,
she's still contracting.
This is it,
this is the baby.
All right, now, try
to stay calm now.
You want me to
get a doctor?
No, don't talk to me,
I feel sick.
What?!
Faint. I feel faint.
Do your breathing.
I can't.
I feel nauseous.
Help him, please!
Get him in the front seat.
Well, what
about you?!
I'm sorry, I feel...
I got to get air.
Here comes another one.
Keep... Breathe, breathe.
Where did he go?
Hey, mister!
Please, lady,
look give me a break.
( screaming )
Hey, what about her?
You'll have to take over.
Me?!
Listen, no sweat. I can
coach you from here
on how to coach her
back there.
Hey, come on!
No kidding around.
You've got to go
through with this.
Hey, come on, come on.
Shape up, fella, will you?
This happens to some men.
Please don't blame him for it.
Don't make him
feel inferior.
Listen, lady, I'm a stranger.
You don't want me.
You want him.
She was the star pupil
in her class.
She'll take coaching
from anybody.
Hey, where are you going?!
Come here!
What are you doing?
( breathing quickly )
Here, watch me-- like this.
Coach her, coach her,
don't let her coach you.
He's right, he's right.
Don't worry
about how I am.
Make sure
she follows you.
Make sure she
follows you.
You're the boss,
remember.
Have you got something
to catch the baby?
Huh?
Use your coat.
Make sure
she's relaxed.
Don't let her muscles
tense up.
Hold her hand.
You can't hold my hand,
I need my hand.
I can't hold her hand,
she needs her hand.
Forget her hand.
Hey! What are you doing?
Getting into position.
It's coming.
I can feel it.
Make sure she's at
a 45-degree angle.
To what?! To what?!
Are you pushing yet?
I didn't know
I was supposed to push.
I'm not talking to you.
Oh.
Push. Are you pushing?
( straining ):
I'm pushing!
What's he doing?
He's doing fine.
What's wrong?
What's wrong?
Isn't she concentrating?
How should I know?
Why don't you call a doctor.
Use the radio, will you?
Are you all right?
All right, I got it.
Here, you talk.
Oh, my God.
Louie! Alex. Cab 804.
Listen, you got trouble here.
A lady's having a baby.
LOUIE:
I never saw her before.
No, Louie, Louie! Louie!
We're on 61st Street between
Second and Third Avenues.
Get a doctor quick,
will you, please?
It's coming.
Oh, my God.
Keep breathing!
Keep pushing!
Push.
You'll be all right.
You'll be all right.
Just take it easy.
Just relax.
Allen, watch. It's coming.
I can feel it.
I can't.
Huh?
Allen! Look!
I can't look.
I'm going to remember this.
You let a stranger
deliver our baby.
I'll never marry you now.
Ruth, don't...
Ruth, please, don't be mad.
I can't help it.
Yeah, come on, Ruth,
this is no time to argue.
Marry him
if he wants to marry you.
Marry a man who won't even
look at our baby?
All right, all right. I'll look.
But what if I pass out?
Oh, God.
Look at that.
ALEX:
Now, take it easy.
I got it.
Watch the shoulders, now.
Careful.
Ruth, it's so beautiful.
Easy now.
Easy.
You're almost home free.
Ruth, it's a boy.
It's a boy.
Yeah. A boy.
( baby crying )
Wrap him up.
Don't cut
the umbilical cord.
Lay him on top of Ruth.
He'll stay warm there.
Allen, look.
Hey... I'm a father.
Ruth, I love you.
I love you too.
Hey, Congratulations.
Hey, Mister, really...
I don't know how
to thank you
for all this.
Aw...
We don't have a name
for him yet. What's your name?
Alex.
Maybe we'll just get you
a bottle of scotch.
Hi.
Hey, Bob,
what's happening?
Any word on 804 yet?
They took it upstairs.
They're still going
to work on it.
Well... Latka!
Just tell me.
How's it going?
Yeah, how's
the car, man?
Ladies and gentlemen,
I now present to you
cab 804.
ALEX:
Latka!
The man's a genius,
a genius.
Thank you very much.
Hey, can I be
the first to drive it?
Hey, wait a minute! I want
to be the first to drive it.
I saved a guy's life
in this car.
Hey, I saved my own
life in this car!
I met my dream man
in this car.
Now, hold it, hold it.
Now just hold it!
I know you all have good reasons
to want this car,
but I think I got you all beat.
I brought
a beautiful human being
into the world in this cab.
When a man is right,
a man is right.
Well, thank you, Louie.
Thanks.
Oh, Alex?
Yes, Latka?
One thing--
Be careful of steering.
You know, sometimes
you turn... go this way
when the car,
it go this way.
Okay.
Oh, and also...
Yes?
Brakes are
really good now
except when it's wet
or very dry.
Leave it to me.
Okay.
Oh, and one...
also, Alex.
Be sure don't go over
25 mile per hours
because if you do,
transmission...
Don't worry
about it, Latka.
Okay. See you later.
Okay.
See you, Alex.
( engine sputters
and backfires )
Hey, Alex!
TONY:
It's burning!
JOHN:
Turn it off!
BOBBY:
Alex!
On reflection, I think
I delivered that baby in 803.
Hey, guys.
I think I made a mistake.
It wasn't this cab at all.
( theme music playing )
WOMAN:
Night, Mr. Walters.
( grunts )