TaleSpin (1990–1991): Season 1, Episode 49 - In Search of Ancient Blunders - full transcript

- [thunderclap]
- [man chuckling]

Spin it!

[men vocalizing]

Let's begin it.

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh
- ♪ TaleSpin

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ TaleSpin

♪ Friends for life
through thick and thin

♪ With another tale to spin

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh
- ♪ TaleSpin

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ TaleSpin

♪ All the trouble we get in
with another tale to spin



Spin it!

[vocalizing]

Spin it, my friend.

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh
- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh, ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh, ohh-ee-yo

[rapid vocalizing]

♪ Spin it, let's begin it
Bear 'n grin it when you're in it

♪ You can win it in a minute
When you spin it, spin it, spin it

♪ So spin it!

♪ TaleSpin! ♪

We should have been in Aridia
over an hour ago, Wildcat.

What's our position?

Way high up in the air.



Oh, let me see that.

Hey!
You're reading the map upside down.

We're flying in the wrong direction.

No wonder we haven't seen any desert.

We got to get this tablet
to the museum by 3:00.

'Cause you'll never work
in this town again if you don't?

Nah. 'Cause they'll probably
treat us like kings in Aridia.

The red-carpet treatment.

Dancing girls, fabulous feasts.

[laughs]
I don't want to be late for that!

Either the Sea Duck is late
to its own ambush,

or we forgot to change our clocks
to Aridian Standard Time.

I cannot wait!
I must have that tablet!

You have a headache,
Captain Karnage, sir?

Not an aspirin tablet.

The ancient stone tablet

which will lead me to
the lost treasure of King Utmost!

How you gonna read it
if it's in some funny language?

With this.

"Ancient Hieroglyphics Made Easy."
[giggles]

[whispers]

[chuckles]
The sitting duck approaches.

Ambush stations, men!

[Baloo] Mountain passes
make me nervous.

You never know
who may try to jump you.

[yawns]

Ready... aim...

...devour!

[crashing]

Why did we go stop?

[whispering]

What do you mean we are stuck?

Keep your eyes peeled
for any welcoming parties, Wildcat.

OK, Baloo.

Hey!
Is this the welcoming party?

Huh.
They must have got tired of waiting.

I guess we'll have to carry the stone
to the museum.

[groaning]

Hold it, Wildcat.
Let's put her down.

Whoo!
That thing seem heavy to you?

- No.
- [sighs] Well, let's keep going.

- Ready?
- Ready.

[grunts] Don't worry,
it's tough going now,

but we'll be waited on hand and foot
before you know it.

"Coming soon,
Museum of Ancient History."

Shall we wait for it?

Nah. Let's check next door.

[straining]

You brought the tablet!

How wonderful!

I'm Myra, State Archaeologist,
Minister of Culture.

And I'll be the museum curator too,
when it opens.

Pleased to meet you.
Can I set this thing down somewhere?

Just put it there.

Sorry, ma'am.

I can't believe
the tablet of King Utmost

was discovered at a thrift shop.

On sale, too.

This is a great discovery.

We ought to be getting dinner now.

Well, goodbye
and thank you for all your help.

But--but--but what about dinner?

I'm sorry.

I'll take you
for some of our local delicacies.

Is it OK if we take the tablet?
I can't wait to translate it.

Allow me.

I apologize for the long walk.
Taxis are scarce in Aridia.

[straining]
Oh, that's OK.

What I'm losing in strength
I'm gaining in blisters.

Hey, Baloo, I don't see
any dancing girls.

They're dancing in another country.

I'm starting to get the feeling
Aridia's not real big on nightlife.

Sorry, ma'am.

But Aridia does have a rich culture,

contained entirely within
the great pyramid of King Utmost.

But the location of the pyramid
is a mystery

and no one's ever been able to find it.

- How'd you know that?
- It says so on the menu.

Unbelievable. The tablet shows
the location of the great pyramid.

If I find the pyramid, I'll finally
be able to build the museum

and help Aridia's economy.

Waiter!
Three house specials, please.

At least we're getting a free meal.

[glass shattering]

[gulp]
Oh, that's it. We're gone.

Almost forgot.
Got a dental appointment at 5:00.

Well, thank you for all your help.

Look, Baloo, the waiters are triplets.

They're not waiters, Wildcat.
They're pirates.

Pirates?!

Hand over the tablet, flyboy.

Sure thing.

Give me that stone.

You'll have to get past me first,
Dump Truck.

How about best two out of three?

It will take more than a chair
to stop me.

He was right.

That's pretty fancy footwork, Wildcat.

Thank you.

I'm slipping on bean dip.

Well, ma'am, I guess we'll be off.

Before you go, do you think
you can make sense of these coordinates?

Please?

This is it.
Those coordinates point right here.

But this is the airport.

I just don't understand.

[Baloo] I'm really sorry, ma'am.
I know I read the tablet right.

Maybe there just isn't any pyramid.

But, Baloo, the tablet says
the pyramid's right here.

Wildcat, you're reading things
backwards again.

If the pyramid was right here,
we'd be standing on it.

[gulps]

[Baloo] Any sign of pirates, Myra?

The coast is clear, Baloo.

[grunts]

There anything in the tablet
about a password?

Not that I could see.

Hey! Wildcat!

Whoa! Who-a-a!

[thud]

Baloo, are you OK?

[Baloo] Watch that first step.

It's a lulu.

If the pyramid will not come to Karnage,

Karnage will come to the pyramid.

Wildcat!
Where are you?

Down here, Baloo.

Hey,
what are you doing upside down?

Wildcat, get down here.
You can't walk on the ceiling!

I can't?

This is amazing.
They built everything upside down.

Even the statues are bolted
to the ceiling... floor.

Why would anyone want to build
an upside down pyramid?

Maybe they all walked on their hands.

Maybe they all
thought like you, Wildcat.

Be careful.

The ancient pyramids are rife
with secret traps.

But who'd be crazy enough
to put a trap on the ceiling?

[all screaming]

Look! An inscription.

But it's upside down.

Why am I not surprised?

It says, "Beware of mummy.

Keep reading for further details."

A mummy!
[laughs]

Boa constrictors I'm afraid of,
but mummies?

[growls]

- [mummy growling]
- [gulps]

Hey, who's our mummy?

[panting] Oh, great.

We had to pick a room
with high ceilings.

Quick, up that column.

What did you do to make him mad, Baloo?

Nothing.

He got up on the wrong side
of the sarcophagus this morning.

Come on, Baloo!

[mummy growling and snarling]

My turn to ride the mummy next!

Try not to damage him, Baloo.
He's a historical artifact!

Well, I'm gonna be one too in a minute!

We've got to do something.

All I can find was this accordion.

That's not an accordion.
It's a ladder.

Here, Baloo.

Oops.

So, you come here often?

I'm not waiting to see what happens
when he gets to my end.

That'd stop a two-ton truck.

[snarling]

Wow!
He must get a lot of exercise.

Yeah, so will we, running out of here.
Come on!

[Baloo]
Everybody OK?

[Myra]
I'm OK.

Wildcat, are you in here?

I don't know.
I'm still looking.

[Baloo]
Where are we?

[Myra] It must be
the Chamber of Eternal Night.

[Baloo] Then there's probably no point
in looking for the light switch.

I've got some matches.

[Baloo] Let me have them.

[Wildcat] I know they're here somewhere.
[mumbling] No.

Oop, that's not them.

Wait. I found something.

It's big and cold and wet.

[Baloo] Wildcat, let go of my nose.

Sorry. Here they are.

I'm surprised you didn't bring
the kitchen sink.

Got any dirty dishes?

No. Ouch!

- [Myra] What happened?
- [Baloo] A third-degree burn happened.

I'll try again.

I'm just glad we got rid of that mummy.

[Baloo] Hmm, must be a breeze in here.

[Myra] Let me try.

- Good work, Myra.
- I didn't do anything.

[snarling]

[roaring]

[running footsteps]

Look who has dropped in for a visit.

Put that down. It's priceless.

What are you doing, dumb-dumb?

She said it wasn't worth anything.

[mummy roars]

I love our little chats,
but there's this mummy after us.

Do you think I am stupid in the head?

You cannot frighten me away
with silliness about a mummy.

- M-m-mummy!
- Come on, this way!

This cheap mummy costume
does not fool me.

Now, stand aside
or you will need a new Band-Aid.

[laughs nervously]

Nice suit, and what a fit.
I tell you this.

You let me take the treasure
and I split it with you 50-50.

Yes? No?

Good idea. OK, 60-40,
but that is my final offer.

[roars]

OK. You asked for it.

Get him!

I was afraid he'd say that.

Ah-ha!
The way out.

Say, this looks familiar.

I can finish reading the inscription
if I can just get a good angle on it.

Let's go, Myra. Our mummy pal
could drop by any second.

But the hieroglyphics might tell us
how to get rid of the mummy.

All right. You twisted my arm.

[whispers]

There must be an easier way
to pillage this pyramid.

[whispers]

Excellent, Gibber.

Radio the Iron Vulture
and tell them to bring the cables.

The fat ones like this.

Hmm...

It seems the mummy was the foreman
who built the pyramid.

He read the blueprint wrong
and built the pyramid upside down.

What a great idea.

Yeah, he was probably
an ancestor of yours, Wildcat.

[Myra]
King Utmost was so embarrassed

he put a curse on the foreman

and condemned him to stop anyone
who stumbled onto the shameful secret.

Poor guy.

Could we skip to the part
about getting rid of the mummy?

Ah-ha! To lift the mummy's curse, the
pyramid must be turned right side up.

Oh, is that all?

[roars]

Where do we start lifting?

Way to go, Wildcat!

[roars]

Come on. This way.

No, this way.

Why didn't you tell us
you knew the way out?

- You didn't ask.
- [growling]

I'm worried. We can't just
leave those pirates in here.

What are they gonna do,
take the whole pyramid?

What's going on?!

They're taking the whole enchilada.

We got to get to the Sea Duck.

Uh-oh, handsome's back.

Ha ha!
The lost treasure is mine!

[Baloo] Whoa!

[roars]

[all exclaiming]

Poor mummy.

How about poor us?
Let's get out of here.

[Myra]
But we have to save the pyramid!

Right.

Now, listen here, Karnage.

Put down that pyramid or else!

[Karnage]
Or else what, future victim?

Anyone got any ideas?

- No.
- Not me.

[Baloo]
Let me get back to you.

Uh-oh.

All I asked for was a couple
of dancing girls and a free meal.

Instead, I've been jumped by pirates,
chased by a crazed mummy,

lost inside an upside-down pyramid

and now I'm being shot at!

[Wildcat]
Yeah, I'm having a great time, too.

Thanks for bringing me along, Baloo.

At least we should be safe
back here for a while.

[whispers]

So, those silly foolish types

think they can outfox the fox
by hiding behind his backside, eh?

- [whispers]
- Yes, yes, yes.

Bring out the great big gun
that makes the loud kaboom-boom.

Uh-oh, looks like
we got some fireworks.

Baloo, what's big and round
and made of black metal

and hollow in the middle?

I haven't got time for riddles
right now, Wildcat.

I got an emergency down here.

This is really important, Baloo.

All right, Wildcat. I give up.

- What?
- That.

[Baloo] Whoa!

We'll be safe down here.

[snarls]

How about if we toast those cables?

Now you're thinking
right side up, Wildcat.

And when we're done,
we can toast some marshmallows.

How's it going out there, Wildcat?

I think I singed one.

Well, keep going.

[growls]

Hey, where'd the plane go?

Hey, where's Wildcat?

Now I'm really starting to get upset.

That pirate's stealing my life's work
and ruining the future of my country.

What could be worse?

[growls]

- Look out!
- Doesn't the guy ever knock?

[whispers]

The Sea Duck has returned.

Fire at will!

[screaming]

[whispers]

No, do not fire at Will.

He is my second mate.

Fire at the Sea Duck!

Here we go again.

I think it might be safer to take
our chances with laughing boy here.

On second thought,
I could be wrong.

Will you knock it off?

[timid groan]

What is your problem?

It's not our fault you built
the lousy pyramid upside down!

- We didn't put the curse on you.
- [timid groan]

We're trying to help you.

You can stomp around all day
growling like an idiot,

or you can give us a hand.

[muttering]

Now, look.
That pirate's stealing the pyramid.

Are you going to let him
get away with that?

Uh-uh.

Then get out there and do your thing!

[growling]

[roars]

What are you doing on the pyramid?

If he plays his cards right,
he might just put an end to that curse.

It's the way out. We made it!

[both exclaiming]

What is happening
to our posterior back end back there?

[whispers]

Then turn the rear engines on
full throttle.

Are the rear engines
still on full throttle?

[whispers]

I was afraid so.

Where she stops, nobody knows.

But where's that mummy?

[crowd murmuring]

Looks like he's getting
some well-deserved shut-eye.

He's our star attraction.

We'll even take in enough
to build a new airport.

And what else?

And a nice red carpet,

and some dancing girls.

Solid!

Wildcat, what are you doing?

I like the place better this way.

And they say if you listen closely,

you can hear the voice of the pharaohs.

[pirate] Captain, are you in here?

- Please answer me, please.
- Yoo-hoo. Captain?

Where are you?

♪ TaleSpin

♪ TaleSpin

[men vocalizing]

♪ Another tale to spin

♪ TaleSpin

♪ TaleSpin

[vocalizing]

♪ Another tale to spin

[men vocalizing]

[man chuckling]

♪ TaleSpin ♪