TaleSpin (1990–1991): Season 1, Episode 41 - Citizen Khan - full transcript

- [thunderclap]
- [man chuckling]

Spin it!

[men vocalizing]

Let's begin it.

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh
- ♪ TaleSpin

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ TaleSpin

♪ Friends for life
through thick and thin

♪ With another tale to spin

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh
- ♪ TaleSpin

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ TaleSpin

♪ All the trouble we get in
with another tale to spin



Spin it!

[vocalizing]

Spin it, my friend.

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh
- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ Ohh-ee-yo

- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh, ohh-ee-yo
- ♪ Ohh-ee-yeh, ohh-ee-yo

[rapid vocalizing]

♪ Spin it, let's begin it
Bear 'n grin it when you're in it

♪ You can win it in a minute
When you spin it, spin it, spin it

♪ So spin it!

♪ TaleSpin! ♪

[plane approaching]

[Kit] Wow! All this nothing
is really something.

I wouldn't want a breakdown
to happen around here.



Well, that's why
we brought Wildcat along.

Better see what he's up to.

Bombs away!

What are you doing?

These Carnuvian kumquats
are worth their weight in do-re-mi.

I was getting rid of the rotten ones.

The only reason we fly this shortcut
is so there won't be rotten ones.

It doesn't look like it's short enough.

This one smells worse
than Colonel Spigot's aftershave.

Whoo-wee!

We have to move our tail
or this whole deal is gonna turn sour.

[sirens approaching]

- [Kit] Sounds like the police.
- [Baloo] What police?

We're in the middle of nowhere,
there aren't police here.

Pull over!

Those kumquats and I don't have time
to play cowboys and Indians.

- [machine neighing]
- Let them have it, Wendell.

Whoa! They shot my baby!

[Kit] Guess we have time to play
cowboys and Indians after all.

[man] This court is now in session.

The prisoners are charged with
speeding, littering, resisting arrest

over the Boomstone city limits.

Six months hard labor and
confiscation of the offending vehicle.

What?! You can't do that!
The Sea Duck's private property.

Not anymore!

Gomer, you have got to stop this. You're
not the sheriff, you're not the judge.

You're just an employee of Khan
Enterprises like the rest of us.

Oh, Clementine, why are you making
such a big deal out of this?

Because you force anyone who happens
along to work in that horrible mine.

Until Khan tells me different,
we're running things my way.

How's he supposed to? You got the only
phone and it's been broken for weeks.

You just keep writing Khan
those reports.

We'll keep mailing them
till we hear different.

- Take them away, Wendell.
- What's Khan got to do with this?

[Wendell] He owns the town
and the silver mine.

Well, look here, Cowboy Bob,

we just happen to be pals
with Mr. Shere Khan.

You let us go,
if you know what's good for you.

Mr. Khan may own this town,
but he don't run it.

I do.

Now, put these "pals"
of Mr. Khan to work.

[Baloo] When Khan hears about this,
you won't be dogcatcher of a mud puddle.

And how's he gonna find out?

Why, he'll read Clementine's reports.

You know anything
about any reports, Wendell?

Not a thing, Sheriff.

What old Khan doesn't know,
won't hurt me.

What is this stuff, anyway?

It's not silver.

It's Urgonium, son.

We ran out of silver quite a while ago.

Then our mining machines
came across a vein of this stuff.

Looks like it didn't agree with them.

Urgonium has a peculiarity
that's hard on machines...

...and miners.

That's why we have to arrange
for special volunteers

to work the mine for us.

Like you all.

What kind of peculiarity
are we talking about?

One that will have armies and demolition
companies paying out of the nose

for every teeny, tiny piece.

It's kind of pretty for a rock.

Put that back where you got it,
fuzz-for-brains.

Anything you say.

- [rumbling]
- [all yelling]

That's a pretty peculiar peculiarity,
all right.

You guys seen my cap?

I don't believe it!

What's the matter?
You two look like you've seen a ghost.

Baloo, look!

Wildcat looks just like Khan.

Well, I guess there's no use
pretending anymore.

No. No use pretending, all right?

Pretending what?

[clears throat] They've discovered
your secret, Mr. Khan.

Oh, yeah. Sure.

My friends would call me "Shere,"
but I don't have any friends.

Well, Mr. Khan,
what are you doing here?

- All dressed up and such?
- I always dress this way.

Except on my birthday,
I have a special suit for that.

What the Chairman means is that he
always dresses this way

when investigating such things as...

...missing reports.

Wendell, get the plane to fly
our illustrious guests back to town.

When he's sufficiently rested,

we'll have the explanation
he so richly deserves.

- Aren't you gonna lock the door?
- No.

The only way out of here
or Boomstone is by plane.

Besides, they like it here.

So that's the great and powerful Khan.

And he has a plane.

Our ticket home.

And you'll be winging your way home
from this surprise visit in no time.

Seems our surprise pretty much
caught you by surprise.

Yep. Your surprise ruined our surprise.

You had a surprise?
That is a surprise.

We knew Mr. Khan had about given up on
our mine when we discovered Urgonium.

We wanted it to be a surprise.

Why sure you did.

And you saved every piece just for him?

Every chunk we've mined so far
is on our getaway patrol plane.

For safe keeping.

[Baloo] So it won't
fall into the wrong hands.

That's it exactly. Just been
a great, big misunderstanding.

Right, Mr. Khan?

Mr. Khan?

That would hold better
with a large wad of bubblegum.

[chuckling] Planes are the boss' hobby.

I figured that as soon as I saw the
antique he was flying around in.

Why don't you all make yourselves
comfortable till takeoff time?

It's your town, after all.

[Kit] I don't trust that sheriff.

Yeah, that's why we're making prop wash
as soon as the Sea Duck's up to snuff.

We can't keep up this charade forever.

Khan gets home and we're through.

That's why he's not getting home.

Now here's what I want you to do.

[Wildcat] I'm worried about
the Sea Duck, Baloo.

[sighing] Relax, Mr. Khan.

We'll sneak a look later
when things are a little less tense.

Hello, Mr. Khan, remember me?
I'm Clementine Clemenger.

I must say, you certainly had us fooled.

Oh, charmed, I'm sure.

Now, I thought we should
go over the books, while you're here.

It's been a long time
since we've heard from you.

OK. What are all these numbers for?

Why, Clementine,
what are you doing around here?

I wanted to meet Mr. Khan and get him
back up to speed on the mine.

I'm sure Mr. Khan doesn't want
to spoil his meal with work.

In fact, how about
a nice game of pool? My treat.

Sure, I love pool.
But, I didn't bring my suit.

Mr. Khan... [whispering]

I mean, billiards would be divine.

- Come, my dear.
- Uh, but...

If you'll excuse me,
I have to get my teeth cleaned.

What about Clementine?

Trying to keep her in the dark while we
stole the Urgonium was a real pain.

[humming]

[chuckling]
You're not at all what I expected

a ruthless financial genius to be like.

Oh? I've been sick.

Stand back, I'm really gonna blast 'em!

I missed one.

Uh, Mr. Khan, why don't we
give the lady a tour of the Sea Duck

- before the sheriff comes back?
- Yeah, the Sea Duck.

Come on, Clem.

What are they doing, Baloo?

I don't care, as long as
they aren't doing it to me.

Sheriff, they're gone!

Dadburn it, get in there before
something happens to that ball!

[sputtering] Right.

Oh, Wendell.

If it was raining soup,
you'd fetch a fork.

[Wildcat] The Sea Duck's
right over here, Miss Clem.

Now where'd that mechanic drift off to?

Why don't you have
a look at the engine, Mr. Khan?

Oh, is there anything he can't do?

Yeah, find his head with both hands.

Uh, can you determine the problem,
Mr. Khan?

Yeah, I read this one already.

I was referring to the engine, boss.

Oh, easy as pie.

Great, you fix it while we distract,
I mean entertain the sheriff.

Got any bubblegum, Clem?

[sighs] I am convinced nothing
is too difficult for you, Mr. Khan.

I draw the line
at eating brussel sprouts.

Right now brussel sprouts
are not your most serious problem,

Mr. Khan.

[wolves howling]

[man] Now we'll see how you
like it down here, Chairman Khan.

[man 2] Yeah, he'll love it down here.

- But, there must be some mistake.
- What mistake?

We work and starve so you can get fat.

I thought I was
putting on a few pounds.

What are you gonna do?

It's not what we're gonna do.

It's what you're gonna do.

Lost? How could he get lost
in a town that's only a block long?

Maybe he wanted to get lost.

That Miss Clemenger's
a whole lot of woman.

- [Clementine] The miners took him!
- Huh?

[sobbing] They kidnapped Mr. Khan,
it was terrible.

They gave me this to deliver.

"We have the skunk Khan, we demand
safe passage out of this smelly place."

"In the oppressor's own aircraft.

Refuse us and Khan's history."

We've got room on the Duck,
let's go get him!

Not so fast. Nobody's going nowhere!

- Says who?
- [Gomer] Says me!

- Anything you says.
- But we have to rescue Mr. Khan!

I am not going to succumb
to the demands of a crowd of hooligans.

- Mr. Khan would want it that way.
- But...

You've been through
a horrible experience.

You go take a nap or something
while I handle it.

[grumbling] I'll show him
a horrible experience!

That will hold these two till the miners
get Khan out of our hair

and we can fly off into the sunset
with our Urgonium.

I should've known the sheriff
was lying about the phone.

Come on, come on. Somebody pick it up!

[phone ringing]

This will teach me to let my employees
go home after a mere 16 hour workday.

- Yes?
- [whispering] Hello.

I need to speak to someone. It's a
matter of life and death for Mr. Khan.

Is that so?

The miners in his Boomstone silver mine
have snatched him!

Really? Somehow I find that
hard to believe.

If someone doesn't hurry,
it will be too late! They'll...

- [Gomer] Clementine!
- Oh, no.

I don't think you should be
wandering around alone.

Hey, let me take you to your room.

Make sure you're not disturbed

till this Khan business
is taken care of.

Well, I suppose I should investigate
my untimely abduction.

That darn sheriff.

Mr. Khan never should have trusted him.

Oh, dear.

What are those cretins up to?

We'll take care of Khan's boys
as soon as they open that door,

and try to rescue their boss.
So, where are they?

I don't know, sheriff.
I did everything you told me to.

We'll tell them
they was transporting Urgonium.

And had an accident.

[Baloo] We have to get out of here
and rescue Wildcat.

[groaning] And I don't think
this is gonna do it.

Hmm. Let me give it a try.

[gasping] Well,
this works in the movies.

So much for the movies.

[howling]

After her bath,
a girl's ready for anything.

Baloo, I'm stuck.

Hang on, Little Britches.

- [bars screeching]
- [gasping]

Go down there and see what's the matter.

[stammering] Sure, sheriff.

[Baloo] It's starting to give.

- Don't say it.
- Well, what now, Papa Bear?

Oh, we've tried everything
I can think of.

Come on, Little Britches.
Let's vamoose.

Those flyboys are as slow as Wendell.

Wait. What's this?

All right, boys. Come to papa.

- [Clementine] Stop!
- Huh?

- [Baloo] What happened to you?
- Never mind.

Just follow me out the back way!

Whoops! I better tell the sheriff
they snucked off.

Come on, come on.

A-ha!

Oh, Wendell!

They're headed for the mine!

- Come on!
- Yeah, gotta stop them.

We must save Mr. Khan
and rescue those poor miners.

Oh, we intend to save him,
but about this Mr. Khan business...

No wonder he wasn't what I expected.

Let's hope your miner buddies
haven't been too rough on him.

Oh-oh.

The sheriff. Come on!

- They're going in the mine!
- Yeah, but they ain't coming out.

[all panting]

- Are they coming?
- Not yet.

But you can bet
they're up to something.

All right, Wendell,
break out the heavy artillery.

Right away, sheriff.

Come on, it's time to live
happily ever after.

- [gasps] They blew up the tunnel!
- Well, let's just take another way out.

There is no other way out.

[all] Wildcat!

[all] Wildcat?

That's the name,
don't wear it out. [chuckling]

We should have known
this wasn't Khan.

If brains was perfume,

you couldn't smell this guy
through a barb wire fence.

If you want to work the real Khan over,
you'll have to wait till we get you out.

And how are we supposed to do that?
We're buried alive.

[humming]

We'll be OK, just give me a hand.

Wildcat, are you sure?

Well... anybody got any bubblegum?

Just think of it, Wendell,
a plane full of Urgonium,

and no more Khan to fool with.

- [wind blowing]
- [plane approaching]

I thought you was
down with the miners.

So I've been told.

Hey boss, maybe the one
we got down there ain't the...

Mr. Khan, what a surprise.

We were just about to call you
to let you know

about the problems
we've been having with an imposter.

I would very much enjoy meeting myself.

Can you arrange it?

Well, I'm not sure we can lay our hands
on him right now, you see...

- [ground rumbling]
- What's that?

Last stop, everybody out!

How nice of you all to drop by.

There he is, Mr. Khan, the imposter.

The lowdown varmint
who was trying to steal your mine.

You mistook him for me?

And... who are these?

We mine the Urgonium.

Urgonium? How interesting.

Why haven't I heard about this?

Well, you see... run!

Don't worry, Mr. Khan, we'll get 'em!

So, you never told the sheriff
to mistreat the miners?

My dear, I desire only money and power.

Unpresentable employees
provide me with neither.

[Sea Duck approaching]

[Urgonium approaching]

- Oh, that was close.
- [Urgonium exploding]

How are we gonna fight
against those exploding rocks?

I've got an idea.

[Gomer chuckles] Get ready, Wendell.

This is gonna be like shooting tin cans
with a scatter gun.

These kumquats are so rotten,

they're only good for ammunition.

Loaded, Baloo!

Hold on!

What's that fool doing?

[Baloo] Let them have it, boys!

Bombs away!

What was that?

Nice shooting, Kit!

[engine sputtering]

Oh-uh.

How do you like my new mine foreman?

[Baloo chuckles] Why don't we ask
the new miners?

I guess now that
you met the real Shere Khan,

you don't like me anymore?

Actually, Wildcat,
since I met the real Shere Khan,

I like you even better.

[sighing] In gratitude
for uncovering this subterfuge,

I suppose I can
reimburse you for your kumquats.

That's real decent of you, Khan.

And I promise I won't tell a soul.

And... where's that mechanic fellow?

I want to thank him, too.

Well, Mr. Khan...

I think you'd better ask
your new foreman.

♪ TaleSpin

♪ TaleSpin

[men vocalizing]

♪ Another tale to spin

♪ TaleSpin

♪ TaleSpin

[vocalizing]

♪ Another tale to spin

[men vocalizing]

[man chuckling]

♪ TaleSpin ♪