T.J. Hooker (1982–1986): Season 1, Episode 4 - Hooker's War - full transcript

YOU KNOW WHAT THAT POISON
IS DOIN' TO YOUR SYSTEM?

IT'S GONNA KILL YOU.

ROMANO, GRANDPA HOOKER
DOWNED A GALLON OF COFFEE A DAY

AND MADE IT TO 94.

WELL, TRY THIS. ALL
I'M ASKIN' IS TRY IT.

IT'S DELICIOUS.

JUST A LITTLE RAW
EGGS, ROMANIAN YOGURT,

CRUSHED PAPAYA,
LECITHIN AND MANGO JUICE.

SECRET OF MY
SUCCESS. AND MY VIRILITY.

ROMANO, WHEN
GRANDPA DID GO, AT 94,

12 WOMEN WEPT AT HIS GRAVE.
NOT INCLUDING GRANDMA.



WILL YOU LOOK WHAT'S
COMING DOWN THE BOULEVARD?

CAN YOU PICTURE THE INSIDE?

FUR ON THE WALLS, SATIN
SETTEE, QUAD SOUNDS,

THOSE LITTLE LA...

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

FLAT THROUGH THE LIGHT.

STILL A GOOD 7 MINUTES LEFT
ON THIS BREAK. IT AIN'T FAIR.

WHERE IS IT WRITTEN
THAT LIFE IS FAIR?

PUT DOWN YOUR VIRILITY
JUICE. LET'S DO OUR CIVIC DUTY.

AND, ROMANO, GO EASY
AROUND THE TURNS.

I DON'T WANNA SPILL ONE DROP OF
THIS NICE, SWEET, DELICIOUS COFFEE.

HERE, I'LL GET IT.
NO, LET ME HAVE 'EM.

I WANNA SEE THE INSIDE
OF THIS LOVE MACHINE.

ALL RIGHT, BUT BE CAREFUL.



LET'S GET THEM TURKEYS.

THIS IS 4-ADAM-30.
OFFICER NEEDS HELP.

WE ARE IN PURSUIT,
NORTHBOUND, SYCAMORE,

FROM 3RD STREET,
FOLLOWING AN ORANGE VAN.

WE ARE UNDER FIRE.

THAT COULD HAVE
RUINED MY WHOLE DAY.

WE LOST 'EM.

MAYBE THE BACKUP
UNITS CAN RUN 'EM DOWN.

DRIVER'S GONNA
NEED AN AMBULANCE.

HOOKER! TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

THERE'S ENOUGH
FIREPOWER TO START A WAR.

IF THIS STUFF HITS THE STREET,

THERE'LL BE A BODY
COUNT THAT WON'T STOP.

HEY, GUYS.

PETE BENEDICT. OH, YEAH.

ROBBERY-HOMICIDE DIVISION.

WHO WERE THE OFFICERS ON THIS?

OFF. ROMANO AND SGT.
HOOKER, LIEUTENANT.

HOOKER? THAT'S RIGHT.

THOMAS J. HOOKER?

YOU BET. HE'S RIGHT
OVER THERE, SIR.

HERE. LOOK AT THAT.

HEY, HOT SHOT.

YEAH, YOU HOOKER.
YOU, PLUG-UGLY...

I'M SON OF A GUN. PETE BENEDICT.

THE ORIGINAL DIRTY HARRY.

I HEARD THAT THEY GOT
YOU BACK IN THE CAVALRY.

YOU NEVER WERE
SHORT ON THE GUTS.

NO, IT'S MY BRAIN POWER
I'M WORRIED ABOUT.

THIS IS MY PARTNER, VINCE
ROMANO. LT. PETE BENEDICT.

LIEUTENANT.

ROMANO.

PETE AND I NOTCHED 5
YEARS TOGETHER IN THE 13TH.

YOUR PARTNER HERE WAS THE
BEST DETECTIVE I EVER WORKED WITH.

YOU ON THIS ONE, PETE?

SPECIAL ASSIGNMENT.
ILLEGAL IRONS.

THE COMPUTER READOUT SAYS

THAT THE STREET TRADE
HAS GONE SKY-HIGH.

NO STREET COP NEEDS A
COMPUTER TO TELL HIM THAT.

EVEN 10 YEAR OLDS
ARE PACKING PIECES.

WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU
GUYS HAVE REALLY STUMBLED

ONTO A MAJOR WHOLESALE DELIVERY.

ENOUGH MERCHANDISE
TO ARM EVERY PUNK

IN ALL 12 PRECINCTS
THIS SIDE A TOWN.

UH, HOLD IT, UH...

YOU SEEN THIS GUY BEFORE?

I DON' T THINK SO.

IT'S NOT A FACE
YOU'D FORGET EASY.

GET A LOAD OF THOSE TATTOOS.

THE GUY'S A WALKING GALLERY.

YOU RECOGNIZE THE TATTOO?

I'VE SEEN IT SOMEWHERE,

BUT I DON'T REMEMBER WHERE.

STUPIDEST THING I EVER HEARD.

RUNNIN' A RED LIGHT.

THE STREETS WERE EMPTY!

AH, THOSE GUNS
SHOULD'VE BEEN DROVE

LIKE THEY WAS A
BUSLOAD OF KIDDIES

ON THEIR WAY TO SUNDAY SCHOOL.

THAT HARDWARE WAS WORTH
$200,000 ON THE STREET, MAN,

AND YOU ALL AIN'T
WORTH TIDDLY SPIT!

I GOT CUSTOMERS
WAITIN' ALL OVER TOWN.

THE MAN IS GOING
TO BE BOILING MAD.

THE PRICE...

THE PRICE IS GONNA DOUBLE.

1, 2, 3, 4.

1, 2, 3, 4.

1, 2, 3, 4.

IF YOU DON'T MIND MY
ASKING A SECRET, LIEUTENANT,

I'D GIVE A WEEK'S PAYCHECK TO BE
ABLE TO HOLD A TAN LIKE YOU GOT.

THIS IS REAL. THIS IS
THE GENUINE ARTICLE.

YOU'VE BEEN FISHIN'
WITHOUT ME, PETE?

YOU BETTER BELIEVE. I BEEN
PAYIN' ON THIS CONDO DOWN IN BAJA.

I GOT A YEAR TO
GO BEFORE I RETIRE,

SO I GO DOWN THERE
EVERY WEEKEND.

GEE, IT SOUNDS GREAT.

WHY DON'T YOU
FIND SOME TIME OFF,

GIVE ME A CALL, WE'LL
GO DOWN TOGETHER.

YOU GOT A CUSTOMER.

SOME COLLECTION.

YEAH, SOME OF THESE
WERE SMUGGLED INTERSTATE,

ILLEGALLY IMPORTED,
TRADED FOR DRUGS.

MOST OF THESE WERE
JUST STOLEN FROM CITIZENS

OR FROM SPORTING
GOOD STORES, PAWNSHOPS.

WHY GO TO ALL THE TROUBLE?

JUST ABOUT ANYBODY
CAN WALK INTO A STORE

AND LEGALLY BUY
THEMSELVES A FIREARM.

WELL, FIRST OF ALL,
YOU HAVE TO BE 18.

THEN, IF THE STORE OWNER'S
DOING HIS JOB PROPERLY,

YOU HAVE TO WAIT WHILE
YOU'RE CHECKED OUT.

AT LEAST IN THIS STATE.

FEDERAL LAW SAYS YOU
CANNOT OWN A GUN LEGALLY,

IF YOU HAVE A RECORD, OR
YOU'RE A CONVICTED FELON,

OR YOU'RE CURRENTLY
UNDER INVESTIGATION.

AND THAT LEAVES A LOT OF
KOOKS ITCHING TO GET THEIR HANDS

ON WEAPONS THEY HAVE
NO LEGAL RIGHT TO POSSESS.

ANY SERIAL NUMBERS, YET?

NO, SIR. THEY'RE ALL THE
SAME. NUMBERS ARE FILED OFF.

WIPES OUT ITS HISTORY, MAKES
IT ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO TRACE.

BUT CAN'T YOU BRING THE
NUMBERS BACK WITH ACID ETCHING?

DEPENDS HOW MUCH
METAL WAS TAKEN OFF.

AND WHERE DO YOU THINK I'M
GONNA GET THE BUDGET FROM,

OR THE MANPOWER TO EVEN TRY
ACID ETCHING FOR THIS ARSENAL?

EXCUSE ME, KID,

I WANNA TALK TO YOUR
PARTNER FOR A MINUTE, ALONE.

HOOKER,

IF YOU GET ANY
KIND OF LIGHT BULB

AS TO WHERE THIS
ARSENAL CAME FROM

OR WHERE IT WAS
GOING THAT WOULD HELP.

YOU SEE, THIS IS MY LAST
GIG ON THE DEPARTMENT.

IT'S MY SWAN SONG.
I'D LIKE TO DO IT RIGHT.

YOU GOT IT.

I WISH I COULD REMEMBER
WHERE I SAW THAT TATTOO BEFORE.

LET'S PUT THAT IN THE
COMPUTER, SEE WHAT IT SPITS OUT.

I'M FREE AND CLEAR
ALL DAY SATURDAY,

AND ALL NIGHT. WHAT
ABOUT YOU, ROMANO?

SATURDAY?

DEPEND ON IT.

EXCUSE ME.

UH, DOES DUTY CALL, SARGE?

IT DOES, OFF. ROMANO.
IT TRULY DOES.

♪

ROMANO? HMM.

I'M A BIT CONFUSED. I WAS
UNDER THE DISTINCT IMPRESSION

THAT YOU AND THAT, UH,
THAT LITTLE BRUNETTE

WHO WORKS THE NIGHT SHIFT
FOR, UH, CAPT. SHERIDAN...

LISA. LISA.

I THOUGHT YOU AND SHE
WERE HOT AND HEAVY.

HMM. LISA'S
FANTASTIC. I LOVE HER.

SHE'S HOT, PEPPERY, TEMPESTUOUS.

BUT, VICKI'S WONDERFUL.
I LOVE HER, TOO.

SHE'S SWEET, COOL, SOOTHING.

YOU KNOW, IF I HAD TO
PICK, I'D BE BROKENHEARTED.

FORTUNATELY, THINGS
BEING THE WAY THEY ARE...

WHICH WAY ARE THINGS?

VICKI WORKS DAYS, LISA,
THE GRAVEYARD SHIFT.

THE BEST OF ALL POSSIBLE WORLDS.

AND I'M NEVER LONELY.

FROM THE VANTAGE POINT
OF MY ADVANCING YEARS,

LET ME GIVE YOU A TIP.

A MAN COULD BUY
HIMSELF A PACK OF TROUBLE

TRAVELING THE ROAD YOU'RE ON.

HEY, NO WAY. NOT ME.

I'M CONCENTRATING
HARD, JUST ON THESE TWO.

YOU KNOW,

BEFORE I GOT INTO THE
NEW TRAINING PROGRAM,

AND GOT CONFINED TO
THE ACADEMY BARRACKS,

I USED TO KEEP A HALF
A DOZEN GOIN' AT A TIME.

YEAH.

NOW THAT WAS TROUBLE.

ALL UNITS IN THE
VICINITY AND 4-ADAM-30,

A 211 IN PROGRESS
AT 5TH AND PINE.

4-ADAM-30 HANDLE, CODE 3.

4-ADAM-30, ROGER.

I CAN'T STOP SHAKIN'.

I... I GAVE HIM THE MONEY.

IT WAS ONLY A FEW DOLLARS.

HE HAD A GUN. I WAS SO SCARED.

WHICH DIRECTION DID HE GO?

HE RAN EAST ON MISSION STREET.

WHAT'D HE LOOK LIKE?

SHORT, BLACK, WEARIN'
A BROWN JACKET.

OH, ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU.

HOLD IT. BACK UP.

BROWN JACKET. FITS
THE DESCRIPTION.

GO AFTER HIM. I'LL CUT HIM OFF.

HOLD IT, ROMANO!

IF THIS FELLA WANTED TO KILL ME,

HE'D HAVE PULLED
THE TRIGGER ALREADY.

IS THAT RIGHT, SON?

YOU'RE NOT IN REAL TROUBLE YET.

NOT IF YOU DROP THE GUN.

TRY SHOOTING IT OUT,
AND YOU'LL BE DEAD.

AND BEING DEAD IS AS
MUCH TROUBLE AS THERE IS.

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

IT'S OK.

A MAN CAN CRY IF HE WANTS TO.

I USED TO SEE THAT
IN THE WAR, EVERYDAY.

JUST PUT THE GUN DOWN, SON.

JUST OPEN YOUR HAND,

AND LET IT DROP.

LET IT DROP.

HOOKER, I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU. THIS GUN HAD A FULL LOAD.

ANOTHER ONE. NUMBERS FILED AWAY.

I DON'T WANT THIS KID.

I WANT THE LOW-LIFE WHO
PUT THE PIECE IN HIS HANDS.

WHERE'D YOU GET THE WEAPON, SON?

STREET.

FROM WHO? A DUDE.

WHAT DUDE?

WHAT WAS HIS NAME?

DON'T KNOW ANY NAME.

THIS GUY COMES AROUND THE BLOCK,

ASKIN' ME IF I
WANNA BUY A PIECE.

WOULD YOU KNOW HIM
IF YOU SAW HIM AGAIN?

IF YOU SAW A PICTURE OF HIM?

DON'T KNOW. MAYBE.

LET'S TAKE A RIDE DOWNTOWN.

BENEDICT.

PETE. HOOKER.

THERE'S A YOUNG KID IN THE
HOLDING CELL YOU WANNA TALK TO.

THE STORY'S ON MY REPORT,

AND ANOTHER PIECE
WITH A FILED NUMBER.

GOOD. I'LL BE RIGHT OVER THERE.

ANYTHING ON THE
DRIVER OF THE VAN?

OH, NOBODY'S GONNA
HEAR ANYTHING FROM HIM.

HE DIED IN THE CRASH
OF INTERNAL INJURIES.

GREAT.

WELL, YOU KNOW, HOOKER, UM,

NOBODY SAID THIS
WAS GONNA BE EASY.

NO I.D. ON HIM?

WE'RE RUNNING HIS
PRINTS, BUT NOTHING SO FAR.

WHAT ABOUT THE TATTOO?

NOTHING IN THE COMPUTER.

BUT, UH, IF YOU COME
UP WITH SOMETHING,

LET ME KNOW.

RIGHT.

HEY, HOW'S THE FOOD OVER THERE?

I COULD EAT A BEAR FOR LUNCH.

LUNCH CAN WAIT, ROMANO.

YOU SEE THAT LITTLE GUY OVER
THERE, WITH THE HORSE-BLANKET JACKET?

HOW CAN I MISS HIM?
THAT'S SOME OUTFIT.

HIS NAME IS BANTY,
AN INDUSTRIOUS SOUL.

WRITES NUMBERS FOR THE
SPORTING-MINDED OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

BANTY. HOLD IT!

THIS AIN'T RIGHT, HOOKER.

YOU KNOW, SQUAD CAR COPS,
UH, DON'T ROUST UP GUYS LIKE ME.

YOU KNOW, IT WAS
A DIFFERENT STORY

WHEN YOU WERE A GOLD BADGE.

WHAT HAVE WE GOT HERE? A
SNITCH WHO'S A SOCIAL SNOB?

I AIN'T A SNITCH.

WELL, EXCUSE ME.

CHECK HIS POCKETS, OFF. ROMANO.

I MEAN, SURE, YEAH,

I, UH, I DID YOU A FAVOR
A COUPLE A TIMES.

BUT THAT DON'T
MAKE ME NO SNITCH.

WHAT WE GOT HERE
IS LOTS OF CASH,

AND LOTS A SLIPS OF
PAPER WITH NUMBERS ON 'EM.

HEY, HEY, HEY, COME ON, PLEASE.

THAT'S ILLEGAL
SEARCH AND SEIZURE.

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY
RIGHT, AND I TELL YOU WHAT.

I'LL LET BYGONES BE BYGONES,

WE'LL TEAR UP
THOSE SLIPS OF PAPER

AND SAVE US ALL A TRIP DOWN TO
THE STATION. NOW, I WANT A FAVOR.

WHAT KIND OF A FAVOR?

I WANT YOU TO BUY ME A GUN.

WHAT? YOU'RE A COP.

YOU CAN GET A HOLD OF
ANY KIND OF IRON YOU WANT.

I WANT A STREET PIECE.

ONE THAT HAS NO
HISTORY, CAN'T BE TRACED.

THIS IS HOOKER
YOU-CAN'T-GET-NEAR.

HOOKER THE UN-CORRUPTIBLE.

HOOKER THE BLUE KNIGHT. YOU
GOT A SCAM GOIN' DOWN OR WHAT?

HERE'S $50.

BEFORE I CHANGE MY MIND
AND BOOK YOU FOR PRACTICE,

I WANT YOU TO BUY ME A GUN, OK?

SO LONG, GEORGE.

OFF. ROMANO?

CAN I SEE YOU A MINUTE?

WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

I'M HELPING LISA
REDECORATE HER APARTMENT.

I THOUGHT THE HAND
ON THE HIP WAS MACHO.

FUNNY GUY.

IT MUST BE CONVENIENT HAVING YOUR
OWN DECORATOR ON THE PREMISES.

NOW, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT ROMANO,

BUT, UH, I REALLY THINK
THAT THESE ARE, UH,

UNUSUAL.

THINK SO?

RIGHT. EXACTLY WHAT
I WAS GONNA SAY.

I'LL HAVE TO
THINK IT OVER, LISA,

AND GIVE YOU AN ANSWER LATER.

WELL, UH, HOW ABOUT SATURDAY?

WE CAN SEE HOW
THEY LOOK ON THE SPOT.

SATURDAY? I CAN'T WAIT.

SATURDAY IT IS.

SUNDAY.

THIS SUNDAY W-WOULD BE
BETTER, IF YOU DON'T MIND.

YOU GOT IT. SEE YOU LATER.

BYE, SERGEANT.

BYE, LISA.

BYE. BYE.

IF THAT'S THE DARK
LADY OF THE NIGHT SHIFT,

YOU DO INDEED HAVE
YOUR HANDS FULL.

YEAH. SHE IS FINE, ISN'T SHE?

WHATEVER IT IS I GOT,
IF WE COULD BOTTLE IT,

WE'D MAKE A FORTUNE.

WHAT YOU GOT, JUNIOR,

IS A WHOLE MESS OF
TROUBLE COMIN' UP.

I'M LOOKIN' FOR PETE BENEDICT.
HIS OFFICE SAID HE WAS HERE.

OH, HELLO, HOOKER.

YEAH, HE TOOK SOME SATURDAY
NIGHT SPECIALS UP TO THE LAB.

HE SHOULD BE ON HIS
WAY BACK DOWN BY NOW.

OK.

STANDING ROOM ONLY
IN THE WEAPONS ROOM.

HOW MANY WEAPONS A
YEAR CHECK THROUGH HERE?

THIS YEAR WE'RE PUSHING 10,000.

A GROWTH INDUSTRY.

ANYTHING THAT COMES ALONG
WITH A BUST OR IS CONFISCATED,

OR ISN'T BEING HELD FOR
EVIDENCE, WE STACK BACK THERE.

WHEN IT GETS TOO CROWDED,
WE SHIP 'EM OUT TO A FOUNDRY

THAT MELTS 'EM DOWN FOR SCRAP.

HEY, HOOKER.

SLUMMIN'?

NOT TODAY.

DIDN'T HEAR ANYTHING FROM
YOU ON THE WEAPONS HAUL,

SO I THOUGHT I'D STOP
BY AND SEE WHAT'S SHAKIN'.

YOU DIDN'T HEAR ANYTHING
BECAUSE THERE WAS NOTHIN' TO TELL.

I PICKED OUT 3 DOZEN
OF THESE AT RANDOM,

TRIED ACID ETCHING,
AND CAME UP WITH ZERO.

HMM.

NUMBERS ARE GROUND
DOWN TOO GOOD.

WHAT ABOUT THE KID WE BUSTED?

WE SHOWED HIM PICTURES, DROVE
HIM AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD,

CAME UP WITH ZILCH.

YEAH, MAYBE HE'S LYING. MAYBE
HE'S AFRAID OF THE SNITCH JACKET.

MAYBE, MAYBE NOT.

FINALLY TOOK HIM TO JUVENILE.

WHAT'S WITH YOU, HOOKER?
YOU MISS DETECTIVE WORK?

YOU FORGET THE DIRT, THE
DRUDGERY, THE BOREDOM?

MAYBE I JUST DON'T LIKE TO SEE
INNOCENT PEOPLE BLOWN AWAY

BECAUSE ANY PUNK
WITH AN ITCH CAN BUY

AN UNDER-THE-TABLE
PIECE ANYTIME HE WANTS.

I HEAR YOU.

BUT YOU JUST BRING
IN WHATEVER YOU GOT,

LIKE YOU DID WITH THE KID,
AND I'LL FOLLOW THROUGH.

JUST LIKE WHEN WE
WERE PARTNERS, HUH?

I GOT SOMETHING GOING.

OH, YEAH. I'M LISTENING.

NO, NO. WHEN I'M READY,

I'LL LET YOU KNOW
WHAT I HAUL IN.

NO PROBLEM.

JUST PROMISE YOU WON'T
LEAVE ME OUT ON ANY FUN.

THE DELIVERY'S LATE.

BANTY'S LOOKING NERVOUS.

HIM AND ME, BOTH.

NOW, WAIT A MINUTE.

HERE COMES A SWEET LOOKING GUY.

LET'S GET HIM.

MY, MY, MY.

A VERITABLE PICTURE GALLERY

OF THE FINE ART OF TATTOO.

REMARKABLE
COINCIDENCE, ISN'T IT?

REMARKABLE.

A MATCH UP.

THE TATTOO OF THE SUSPECT,

THE TATTOO OF THE
VAN DRIVER. EXACTLY.

WHAT IS IT, SOME KIND OF DEVIL?

NOPE. I HAVEN'T SEEN
ONE OF THESE IN YEARS,

THAT'S WHY I COULDN'T
REMEMBER IT RIGHT AWAY.

IT'S A MYTHOLOGICAL FIGURE.

IT'S THE SYMBOL OF THE DEMONS.

THE WHO?

A BIG, BAD MOTORCYCLE CLUB.

BROKE UP YEARS AGO.

MUST HAVE BEEN
BEFORE MY TIME, HOOKER.

THANKS, KID. I NEEDED THAT.

THESE DEMONS, THERE
STILL A FEW AROUND?

WELL, THERE'S AN
EX-DEMON. LIVES NEAR ME.

CORNER OF ELDRIDGE AND
11TH. RUNS A MR. FIXIT SHOP.

YOU COULD SAY HE'S
BEEN DOMESTICATED.

WHAT ARE WE
WAITING FOR? LET'S GO.

LOOK, I AIN'T HUNG OUT WITH
ANYONE FROM THE DEMONS FOR YEARS.

I'M ON THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW
NOW EVER SINCE I GOT MARRIED.

YOU GUYS GOTTA PARK YOUR
CAR RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE HOUSE?

YOU WORRIED ABOUT
YOUR CIVIC IMAGE?

HEY, I'M IN BUSINESS HERE AND...

MAULER! WHAT'S
GOIN' ON OUT THERE?

WHAT'D YOU DO TO
BRING THE COPS AROUND?

TOO LATE. SEE WHAT YOU DID!

UH, IT'S ALL RIGHT, HONEYBUNCH.

YOU'VE BEEN DOIN'
ANYTHING, I'M GONNA KILL YOU!

IS THAT ALL YOU
CAN TELL US, MAULER?

THEY'RE RUNNING A,
UH, CUSTOMIZING SHOP

CALLED, UH, I. T. AND M.,
SOMEPLACE DOWNTOWN.

THEY CHOP HOGS, MAKE
OVER VANS AND PICKUPS,

STUFF LIKE THAT.

NOW WILL YOU GUYS
GET OUTTA HERE?

YOU FUZZ LEAVE HIM ALONE.

WHATEVER HE'S DONE,
I'LL STRAIGHTEN HIM OUT.

UH, THANKS, MA'AM.

WE WERE JUST ASKING DIRECTIONS.

4-ADAM-30.4-ADAM-30.

POSSIBLE 187 AT SOUTH
PINE AND RIVERFRONT.

4-ADAM-30, CODE 3.

4-ADAM-30, ROGER.

I THINK I KNOW THAT JACKET.

IT'S NOT LIKELY THERE'D
BE 2 OF THEM AROUND.

POOR BANTY.

THE GUY WAS JUST
TRYIN' TO HELP US.

HE WASN'T MUCH OF A CITIZEN,
BUT HE WAS AN ALL RIGHT LITTLE GUY.

DEAD BECAUSE HE KEPT
HIS BARGAIN WITH ME.

THEY USED BANTY TO
SEND US A MESSAGE.

THEY'RE DECLARING WAR.

WELL, IF IT'S WAR THEY WANT,

IT'S WAR THEY'RE GONNA GET.

COME ON IN, BOYS.

HOT OUT THERE.

CAN WE GET YOU ALL A
BREW FROM THE COOLER?

UH, NO THANKS.

WE'RE ON DUTY. MAYBE, UH,

MAYBE ANOTHER TIME.

OH, NOTHINGS TOO GOOD
FOR THE BOYS IN BLUE.

WHAT CAN WE DO FOR YOU?

WE'RE TRYIN' TO
TRACE A STOLEN VAN.

CARRYING AN ILLEGAL GUN LOAD
THAT CRASHED THE OTHER DAY.

I SUPPOSE YOU HEARD ABOUT THAT?

OH, ONLY WHAT I
READ IN THE PAPER.

NOW, YOU BOYS WERE MEMBERS
OF THE FEARED, MIGHTY DEMONS.

PERHAPS YOU CAN HELP ME
UNDERSTAND WHY 2 EX-DEMONS

WERE INVOLVED THIS PAST
WEEK IN ILLEGAL WEAPON CAPERS?

IT'S ALWAYS SOMEBODY THAT'S
OUT AFTER THAT BIG UNLAWFUL BUCK.

NOW, WE AIN'T SEEN
THEM DUDES IN YEARS,

AND WE DON'T KNOW NOTHIN'
ABOUT NO ILLEGAL GUNS

OR ILLEGAL ANYTHING ELSE,

BECAUSE YOU SEE, WE'RE LEGIT.

BUSINESSMEN. THAT'S RIGHT.

LEGAL.

SO, YOU ARE.

LOOK AT THEIR
EQUIPMENT, OFF. ROMANO.

PUNCHES, DRILL PRESSES,
EXTRUDERS, GRINDERS.

JUST ABOUT EVERY METAL
WORKING MACHINE AVAILABLE.

HEY, YOU DON'T MIND

IF WE LOOK AROUND,
DO YOU, MOUNTAIN?

OH, NO, NO.

SEEIN' AS HOW YOU'VE
GOT A WARRANT.

YOU DO GOT A WARRANT?

IT'S OK BY ME, IF YOU WANT
TO PLAY IT BY THE BOOK.

I'M PLACING YOU ALL UNDER ARREST

FOR VIOLATION OF THE
STATE VEHICLE CODE,

10750 AND 10751.

SAY WHAT?

ALTERING, DEFACING, OR
REPLACING A VEHICLE I.D. NUMBER.

BUYING, SELLING OR
POSSESSING A VEHICLE

WITH THE I.D.'S
REMOVED OR DEFACED.

EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED
TO THIS VEHICLE HERE.

FOR SOME REASON, ANYBODY
ALTERING A STOLEN VEHICLE,

FIRST THING THEY DO IS
REMOVE THE I.D. NUMBER.

THEY COME IN HERE THAT WAY.

ADD SUSPICION OF
RECEIVING STOLEN PROPERTY

TO THE CHARGES, OFF. ROMANO.

HEY, MAN, THIS WHOLE THING
IS A BUNCH OF BULLWASH.

ATTEMPTING TO PROVOKE AN
OFFICER WITH ABUSIVE LANGUAGE.

IF YOU WASN'T
WEARING THAT BADGE,

I'D KICK YOUR TEETH IN.

ADD 415 TO THE
LIST, OFF. ROMANO.

CHALLENGING A UNIFORMED
OFFICER TO A FIGHT.

I THINK I'M JUST GONNA
HAVE TO EARN THAT ONE.

HOLD IT.

THANK YOU, OFF. ROMANO.

ADD ASSAULT, BATTERY,

AND RESISTING ARREST
TO THE CHARGES.

THEN SEND FOR A WAGON.

WHEREAS WE BECAME SUSPICIOUS,

AND REQUESTED TO
SEARCH THE PREMISES.

WHEREAS... OH, ROMANO.

SGT. HOOKER, THERE'S A
MESSAGE FROM LT. BENEDICT.

HE SAID HE'S ON HIS WAY OVER
AND HE WANTS YOU TO WAIT FOR HIM.

HE SAYS IT'S IMPORTANT.

HI, VINCE.

SURPRISE. THEY, UH,
TRANSFERRED ME TO DAY SHIFT.

ISN'T THAT TERRIFIC?

OH, YEAH, UH, THAT'S
WONDERFUL, LISA.

NOW WE WON'T HAVE TO
MEET AT SUCH WEIRD HOURS.

SEE YOU LATER, SWEETIE.

YEAH. LATER.

HI, LISA.

WELCOME TO REAL
LIFE. THE SUNSHINE SHIFT.

THANK YOU.

UH, Y-YOU TWO KNOW EACH OTHER?

OH, SURE. WE'RE OLD FRIENDS.

SAME CLASS AT THE ACADEMY.

AND WE'VE BEEN
DYING TO GET TOGETHER

BUT COULDN'T BECAUSE OF
BEING ON DIFFERENT SCHEDULES.

WELL, NOW WE'LL HAVE THE CHANCE.

OH, GREAT.

I MEAN, UH, GREAT.

REALLY, UH,

GREAT.

IN FACT WE'RE OFF TO LUNCH
TO CELEBRATE LISA'S TRANSFER

AND, UH, CATCH UP ON GIRL TALK.

BYE, SERGEANT.

'BYE, VINCE.

BYE, UH, H-HAVE A NICE

LUNCH.

ROMANO.

ROMANO, JUSTICE IN ACTION.

HOW'D THE LAWYER AND
BONDSMAN GET HERE SO FAST?

WE JUST BOOKED THEM.

I WAS HOPING WE'D HAVE A COUPLE
OF HOURS BEFORE THEY MADE BAIL.

FOR WHAT?

I WANTED TO GET A WARRANT
AND A WRIT OF SEIZURE

FOR THE DEMONS' SHOP EQUIPMENT.

THE LAB CAN COMPARE
THE GRINDING WHEELS

WITH THE WORK DONE ON
THE GUN HAUL FOR STARTERS.

SGT. HOOKER.

MY CLIENTS HAVE DETAILED
YOUR OUTRAGEOUS HARASSMENT.

YOU'RE TREADING ON CIVIL RIGHTS,

TO SAY NOTHING OF
DUE PROCESS OF LAW.

COUNSELOR.

ALL YOUR WEASELING
AND TWISTING OF THE LAW

CAN'T HIDE THE FACT THAT
YOUR "INNOCENT" CLIENTS

ARE GUILTY OF BUYING, SELLING
AND TRANSPORTING ILLEGAL GUNS.

GUNS THAT ARE BLOWING THE
HELL OUT OF CITIZENS' RIGHTS,

AND THE CITIZENS THEMSELVES.

AND I'M GONNA GET YOUR
CLIENTS, COUNSELOR.

NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES.

UH, HOOKER.

NICE OF YOU, UH, TO
DROP BY AND SEE US.

UH, STEP INSIDE, ROMANO.

YOU MIGHT LEARN SOMETHING.

I WANT TO APOLOGIZE
FOR WHAT I'M GOING TO SAY.

IN FACT, I DON'T EVEN
KNOW HOW TO START.

JUST SPIT IT OUT, PETE.

HOOKER, WE HAD A DEAL.

YOU WERE GOING TO
BRING ME INFORMATION.

YOU WERE GOING TO WORK WITH ME.

YOU WERE GONNA WORK THROUGH ME.

BUT, NO, YOU GO OFF HALF COCKED.

I'VE BEEN CLOCKING THAT
DEMON BODY SHOP FOR MONTHS,

HOPING THAT THEY WOULD
LEAD ME TO THE SOURCE.

NOW YOU COULD'VE BLOWN THAT!

WELL, WHAT ABOUT A WARRANT? WHAT
ABOUT A WRIT OF SEIZURE? W-WHAT...

WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH TO GO ON.

NOW, IT HAS TO HOLD UP IN COURT.

NOW WHAT GOOD IS THE ARREST
IF IT ISN'T CLEAN AND BY THE BOOK?

SOME CITIZENS THAT ARE
DEAD WOULD NOW BE ALIVE.

LOOK, UH, I EARN MY
PAY ON THE STREETS.

NOT IN THE COURTROOM.

YOU WANNA BRING ME UP ON
CHARGES, YOU GO RIGHT AHEAD.

WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE.
WHO'S TALKIN' ABOUT CHARGES?

I WANT YOU TO LAY OFF THIS CASE.

NOW, LOOK, I NOT ONLY
WANT YOU TO LAY OFF,

I'M ORDERING YOU TO LAY OFF.

NOW, IS THAT CLEARLY
UNDERSTOOD BY BOTH OF YOU?

OFF. ROMANO?

YES, SIR.

HOOKER?

UNDERSTOOD.

IF THERE'S NOTHING
FURTHER, GENTLEMEN,

WE'RE DUE ON PATROL.

DAVE.

HOOKER. IT TOOK
A LOT OF TALKING,

BUT YOU GOT YOUR WARRANTS
AND YOU GOT YOUR WRIT.

JUST KEEP MY NAME
OUT OF IT, HUH?

HOOKER, YOU'RE NOT
GONNA USE THOSE, ARE YOU?

CAPT. SHERIDAN
ORDERED US TO LAY OFF.

10 MORE MINUTES, THEY'D BE GONE.

HOLD IT! I'VE GOT A WARRANT
TO SEARCH THE PREMISES.

KEEP 'EM ON ICE, ROMANO!

NO. NO. COME ON,
MAN. PLEASE, I GIVE.

NO.

I JUST WANT TO HEAR YOU ASK.

YOU WOULDN'T BE
WORTH THE PAPERWORK.

NUMBERS FILED, HUH?

WHERE'D YOU GET IT, MOUNTAIN?

NO. NO.

WHO'S YOUR CONNECTION?

NO. I AIN'T GONNA SAY NOTHIN'.
I'D BE AS GOOD AS DEAD IF I DID.

WHO'S GONNA PULL THE TRIGGER?

I, UH, I AIN'T GONNA SAY
NOTHIN', MAN. NOTHIN'!

YOU'RE BLOCKING THE GARAGE WITH
YOUR CAR, HOOKER. I CAN'T GET IN.

I THOUGHT HARVEY
WAS DRIVING YOU HOME.

HIS BOARD MEETING RAN LATE. HE
ASKED ME TO MEET HIM AT THE THEATER.

ARE THE KIDS OK?

YEAH. THEY'RE FAST
ASLEEP. AM I RELEASED NOW?

YES, YOU'RE RELEASED.

THANKS FOR BABYSITTING.

WHAT ARE EX-HUSBANDS FOR?

EXCUSE ME.

HELLO. YEAH, HE'S HERE. MMM-HMM.

OK, I'LL TELL HIM.

THAT WAS CENTRAL DISPATCH.
THEY LOCATED PETE BENEDICT.

SAID HE HAD A MESSAGE FOR YOU.

HE'S ON ASSIGNMENT AND
HE'LL TALK TO YOU TOMORROW.

TSK. HMM.

IT WAS IMPORTANT.

MAYBE WHAT PETE'S
DOING IS IMPORTANT, TOO.

HOW DO YOU TALK
TO PETE THESE DAYS?

ALL HE WANTS IS ONE
GLORIOUS SWAN SONG

TO LOOK BACK ON WHILE
HE SITS ON HIS BOAT,

IN MEXICO, COLLECTING
HIS PENSION.

I HOPE TO GOD YOU LIVE LONG
ENOUGH TO DO THE SAME THING.

HE LET ME DOWN.

YOU PUT TOO MUCH
STOCK IN THE PAST, HOOKER.

THE GOOD OLD DAYS.

I LIKE THE GOOD OLD DAYS.

I LIKE OLD CARS,

I LIKE FRIENDSHIPS.

WELL, FRIENDSHIP MEANS DIFFERENT
THINGS TO DIFFERENT PEOPLE.

YOU, YOU'D WALK THROUGH A
FLAMING WALL FOR A FRIEND.

YOU CAN'T EXPECT
THAT IN EVERYBODY.

PETE AND I WERE PARTNERS.

I HAVE A RIGHT TO
EXPECT A LOT FROM PETE.

WE WERE PARTNERS.

DID I EXPECT TOO MUCH FROM YOU?

OH, I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

PEOPLE JUST NEED
DIFFERENT THINGS, I GUESS.

I'M SORRY I COULDN'T BE
EVERYTHING YOU WANTED ME TO BE.

I'M TRULY SORRY.

WELL,

THERE'S NO POINT IN
RAKING UP OLD LEAVES.

NO, NO, NO. WHAT I DON'T
NEED ARE OLD LEAVES.

I GOTTA GO.

LISTEN, DO ME A
FAVOR, WILL YOU? UH,

CALL ROMANO AND TELL HIM
TO MEET ME AT THE PRECINCT.

AND TELL HIM TO BRING THE KIT.

THE KIT?

YEAH, THE ACID ETCHING SOLUTION.

IT RAISES THE SERIAL
NUMBERS ON WEAPONS

AFTER THEY'VE BEEN FILED AWAY.

HOOKER?

THE KIDS ARE COUNTING
ON YOU FOR SATURDAY.

SATURDAY. I'LL BE THERE.

HOOKER?

I'M COUNTING ON YOU, TOO.

TRY A LITTLE MORE.

WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT? IT WORKS.

VICKI,

RUN THIS NUMBER
THROUGH THE COMPUTER.

SEE WHAT YOU GOT.

3, 6, 7,

9, 3, 4.

THANKS FOR STAYIN' LATE, VICKI.

UH, YOU AND LISA
HAVE A NICE LUNCH?

GREAT. GREAT, ROMANO.

WE FOUND OUT WE HAD ALL
KINDS OF THINGS IN COMMON.

WELL, THAT'S NICE.

REAL NICE.

ARE YOU SURE THIS IS THE NUMBER?

367934?

ACCORDING TO RECORDS, THIS
GUN WAS ORIGINALLY STOLEN

ON A RESIDENTIAL BURGLARY.

ABOUT 8 MONTHS AGO IT WAS
TAKEN FROM AN ARMED ROBBER.

SO IT WAS SENT TO
PROPERTY AT HEADQUARTERS.

HOW COME THIS GUN,
CONFISCATED BY THE DEPARTMENT,

HAULED AWAY AND
STORED FOR SAFEKEEPING...

HOW COME THIS GUN IS
OUT ON THE STREETS AGAIN?

THERE YOU ARE,
DESTROYED JUST LAST MONTH.

LAST MONTH? ISN'T
THAT KINDA FAST?

YEAH, YOU COULD SAY THAT,
ESPECIALLY WHEN THIS INDICATES

THAT IT WAS CHECKED IN ONLY A
COUPLE OF WEEKS BEFORE THAT.

WELL, IT USED TO BE
EVERY 3, 4 MONTHS.

BUT NOW WE SHIP 'EM OUT TO
THE FOUNDRY EVERY 30 DAYS,

JUST LIKE CLOCKWORK.

TOOK A SHIPMENT
OUT THIS MORNING.

THEY'RE NOT
DESTROYING THOSE GUNS.

SOMEBODY'S SWITCHING THEM.

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT?

ALL RIGHT, I'LL SIGN
FOR THIS, SARGE.

ALL RIGHT. GOOD ENOUGH.

CAN YOU TAKE ME DOWN,
THAT WAY? YES, SIR.

WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT.

THOSE 2 GUYS ON THE FORKLIFTS.

THEY MUST BE IN
ON THE OPERATION.

CAN YOU LAY THAT HOOK
OVER THERE, BEHIND 'EM?

YES, SIR.

ROMANO, WHEN I GET OFF,

YOU COME DOWN THE LADDER
AND TRY AND CUT 'EM OFF.

I'M DISAPPOINTED IN YOU, PETE.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? YOU
WANNA SHOOT IT OUT WITH ME?

AFTER ALL THESE YEARS?

THAT'S WHAT I WAS THINKIN',
PETE. AFTER ALL THESE YEARS.

LET ME GIVE IT TO YOU STRAIGHT.

HOOKER, I AM CROWDING
50 YEARS OF AGE.

I'VE GIVEN MY LIFE
TO THIS DEPARTMENT!

I'VE ALWAYS PLAYED
IT ON THE SQUARE.

ALL OF A SUDDEN, I REALIZE THAT

I'M FACING RETIREMENT.

I MEAN, I LOOK AROUND,
I SEE THE HUSTLERS.

I SEE THE POLITICIANS.

I SEE THE CROOKED
COPS ALL CLEANING UP.

AND I GOTTA TURN MY BACK ON IT!

THE ONLY THING I GOT
TO LOOK FORWARD TO IS...

IS THE SMALL POTATOES PENSION.

SO WHEN THEY OFFERED
ME THAT JOB WITH THE GUNS,

I SAW A CHANCE.

A CHANCE FOR ME TO DO
SOMETHING FOR MYSELF.

SO WHAT'S THE BIG
DEAL? I'M SELLING GUNS.

WHAT'S A FEW MORE GUNS
ADDED TO THE MILLIONS

THAT ARE ALREADY FLOATING
AROUND THE STREETS?

I UNDERSTAND YOU, PETE.

I EVEN FEEL FOR YOU.

BUT THERE'S ONE
THING THAT BOTHERS ME.

AND IT BOTHERS ME REAL BAD,

ABOUT THE CONDO AND
THE SWEET LITTLE BOAT.

YOU'VE BEEN BUYING
THEM WITH BLOOD.

SOMETIMES THE BLOOD OF
YOUR OWN FELLOW OFFICERS.

TURN AROUND.

PUT YOUR HANDS BEHIND YOU.

HOOKER? WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

YOU LET ME DOWN.

2, 3, 4.

1, 2, 3, 4.1, 2, 3, 4.

SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO
GO OUT FOR A BITE TO EAT?

WITH WHAT YOU EAT, JUNIOR,
I COULD DIE OF STARVATION.

FREEZE!

ROMANO, YOU NO
GOOD, LOWLIFE RAT.

WE TALKED THINGS OVER AT LUNCH.

I MEAN EVERYTHING.

YEAH, I... I CAN...

NOT ONLY ARE WE
GOOD FRIENDS, ROMANO,

BUT WE SHARE THE SAME BELIEFS
ABOUT THE CHANGING ROLE OF WOMEN,

THE FEMININE IMPERATIVE
AND ALL OF THAT GOOD STUFF.

WE'VE BOTH DECIDED
TO FREE OURSELVES

OF THE OLD, CONFINING
ROLE PLAYING,

AND SOCIAL PRESSURES.

AND YOU'RE A NICE,
LIVELY MALE SPECIMEN.

YEAH, BUT WHY DON'T WE...

SO, THIS IS WHAT WE DECIDED.

LISA GETS YOU
TUESDAYS AND FRIDAYS.

I GET YOU MONDAYS AND THURSDAYS.

WE, UH, ALTERNATE
WEDNESDAYS AND WEEKENDS.

HOLD ON. I DON'T
THINK I'M OLD ENOUGH

TO HEAR THIS KIND OF THING.

LADIES, GOOD DAY.
ROMANO, GOOD LUCK.

YOU CAN RETURN MY
CAR IN THE MORNING,

IF YOU CAN STILL
DRIVE, I'M TAKIN' THE BUS.