Sweet Tooth (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 3 - Weird Deer S**t - full transcript

Great leaders are created
in the most unexpected of places.

Clock that aggro mob creeping up.

Ah!

Nuke 'em animal style.

Keep up, Pony.

Tiger, wait.

Ambush! Watch out!

- Ah!
- Rhino, Pony, Tiger down.

- Tiger down!
- No animal left behind.

Tiger, unleash your ultra attack.

Now!



Ah!

Great job.

Emergency IRL. Hybrid distress.

Emergency IRL.
Animal Army, to your stations.

- You all know what to do.
- Emergency IRL. Hybrid distress.

Some are born to follow...

and some are born to lead.

For Gus, he was just happy
to have someone to guide him.

We never had those flowers.

Pubba would've liked them.

That means the Sick's been up here.

Doesn't look sick to me.

Those flowers show up
every time the Sick does.

They're like an omen or something.



How come you don't get the Sick?

I eat a lot of Wheaties.

I don't know, kid.

Some people are just born lucky.

♪ Oh, there's a river
That winds on forever ♪

♪ I'm gonna see where it leads ♪

♪ Oh, there's a mountain
That no man has mounted ♪

♪ I'm gonna stand on the peak ♪

♪ To the ends of the earth
Would you follow me? ♪

♪ There's a world
That was meant for our eyes to see... ♪

Are we there yet?

Almost.

Real almost,
or just almost to make me stop asking?

Real almost.

That's not Colorado.

Nope. It's my stash.

- But I thought you said...
- Got to get a couple things.

We can stay here tonight.

Whoa.

So is this where you live?

I told you, I don't live anywhere.

But I do hide things where I can.

It's a good habit.

Like a squirrel?

Sure.

They smell like
wet moccasins and old raisins.

What does?

Your candy.

You can smell my pills from there?

Well, actually,
I could smell them from outside.

Hm.

You hungry?

Were you gonna leave me?

With that family?

Word of advice, kid.

Don't ask questions
you don't want the answers to.

Hey, you know what tomorrow is?

Train day.

This is a special train.

You know why?

It's going where you're going.

Colorado?

Is the train gonna pick us up here?

No, we gotta catch it at the Market.

How are we supposed to catch it,
and what's a market?

You like apples?

I love apples.

You like caramel?

Depends. What is it?

It's like syrup,

but better.

They melt it
and drip it all over an apple.

Better than syrup?

Whoa!

A little gold man.

Who is he?

Nobody.

I got him for being
good at playing sports.

Sports like "pass the ball"?

I don't know what that is,
but I'm sure you're gonna tell me.

A game me and Pubba used to play.

We'd pass the ball
as many times as possible

before someone dropped it.

Yeah, it is kind of like that.

What do you do with them all?

I don't know, look at them,
like a reminder, I guess.

What happened to his head?

Someone couldn't control his temper.

Once I threw Dog into a fire.

I don't remember why except
how bad I felt afterward.

Yeah. It's... it's like that.

I'm... I'm going outside.

You shout
if you smell anyone that ain't me.

Good night, Big Man.

Hey.

What do you call that thing
with the caramel melted onto the apple?

A caramel apple.

Mama.

- What are you doing in there?
- Uh, sleeping!

Jepp?

Big Man?

Jepperd?

Jepp!

Big Man.

I had a bad dream.

You'll get used to them.

Remember what today is?

Train day.

What else?

- Market.
- Which means Last Men.

Same dudes who tried
to snatch you at the visitors' center.

So I made you a disguise.

Like a costume.

You know, Halloween.

Yeah, of course. Halloween's when
Pubba made pancakes the way I like them,

and we'd hit things with slingshots.

Your Pubba was a weird dude.

You're going in disguise as a human boy

pretending to be a hybrid kid.

But I am a hybrid kid.

Well, today, that's our secret.

You're going to be faking
that you're fake, even though you're real.

Are there any other hybrids at the Market?

Only ones in cages.

This is the medical journal
of Dr. Aditya Singh.

I'm making these recordings for...

Well, posterity, I suppose.

I have taken over
Dr. Bell's medical practice...

and already I've made
the following observations.

Most patients have
garden-variety ailments,

sniffles and skinned knees,

the occasional broken bone.

I remember how much I enjoy
the hands-on practice of medicine,

the ability to restore order
in someone's life.

But almost daily, I'm reminded why I quit.

A time when doctors had to decide
who would live and who would die.

And the fear that
we'll never have a true cure.

I only know of one patient
who has managed to survive the whole time

with the H5G9 virus.

Okay.

I'll refer to her...

as Jane Doe.

I only pray

I can continue to keep Miss Doe

from succumbing like so many before her.

Dr. Bell's research was...

"questionable" would be a generous word.

How long had she been
in her moral no man's land?

I may not be as devout as I once was,

but I still can't bring myself
to do everything she prescribed.

I am haunted by the idea
that it may be the only answer

in saving Jane Doe...

...and what's left of humanity.

You the replacement?

Is everything okay?

Peachy.

Are you pre-gaming without me?

Pre-gaming for what?

Oh, hell, Doug Duncan's party.
We'll have to skip it. We'll have to.

We can't skip Survivors' Day.
They'll never give us a moment's peace.

It's not worth it. You're not 100%.

I'm not contagious. Bell's serum
still hasn't entirely worn off.

You have all the symptoms.
We'll be exposed.

- The medicine simply isn't working.
- And we both know why.

What does that mean?

I'm trying everything in Bell's notebook,

everything except the sadism.
I can't go there.

Even if they are hybrids,
they're still half human

and children!

If anyone can find
a humane alternative, it's you, Adi.

We'll be fine.

We can tell them I didn't feel like it,
I just don't like parties.

Hanson said he just didn't like parties,

and you remember what they did to him.

- No one liked Hanson.
- We'll be okay.

We should have an exit strategy.

A code word, just in case.

- All right, um, "gargoyle."
- What?

If either of us says "gargoyle,"
we say our goodbyes.

How you gonna work "gargoyle"
into a conversation?

That's why it's a good code word.

All right, come here. Let's have a look.

The most beautiful woman in
the Greater Rockbridge metropolitan area.

You silver-tongued devil.

Come on.

Three...

Two...

- One.
- One.

Big Doug, you look great.

Thanks.
Rani, you are a sight for sore eyes.

You look fantabulous.

And Adi, well,
the pinnacle of class, as always.

You're too kind. You're too kind.

Come on. Got mojitos
with your names on them.

- Rani, Adi.
- Hey!

A... a movie?

TV?

And a book? All three?

Everything but an epic poem.

This should be easy for someone, eh?

Nancie, you're flailing like a stuck fish.
Just focus, okay?

- Maybe try giving us a "sounds like."
- Okay.

Sounds like...

Thinking?

- Just wondering.
- Over there?

- Twyla?
- Sounds like "Twyla"?

- "There"?
- "Fur"?

- Sounds like "fur," okay.
- "Burr"?

"Deter," um...

- "Blur."
- "Slur."

Do you know what furries are?

- Uh...
- It's "fur"!

No, it sounds like "fur,"
it can't be "fur."

"Her"! is the word "her"?

- Ben-Hur! It's Ben-Hur.
- Yes!

- Aw!
- Team Rani wins.

Well done!

Never heard of it.

- Wait, what?
- What?

Ben-Hur. Best Picture winner twice.

- Once with Charlton Heston.
- Yeah.

Pretty famous. I know it.

And the only Charlton Heston
I've ever seen is Planet of the Apes.

"You dirty, stinking apes!
You killed Lady Liberty!"

That's not what he says.

Oh, my favorite line.

Yeah, it's a classic.
I've seen that movie, like, ten times.

Is there a gargoyle in, um,

in that, um...

picture... movie? Movie picture?

- Gargoyle?
- Planet of the...

Gargoyle?

- Not sure...
- I'm fine.

Be cool, okay?

Anyone want a refill?

I never planned on getting married.

I was always gonna be, you know, Doug,
the fifth wheel.

That is, until Kelly walked in my practice
looking for a pair of glasses,

but finding me instead.

Suddenly all those sappy love songs
and cutesy memes made sense.

You know that thing they say about
Cupid's arrow, you know, blindsiding you?

Well, it's true.

Love is an anarchist.

It was the best thing
that ever happened to me.

We had three good years before the Sick.

No regrets.

There'll never be another like Kelly.

To Kelly.

To Kelly.

Married all these years,
and still lovey-dovey as teenagers.

Life is fleeting.

We've got to enjoy it while we can.

Uh-oh, you have something
you want to share with us?

Adi? Rani?

Yes.

The, uh, the tamales are outstanding.

Oh!

Sorry, my bad. I... I was moving too fast.

Doug.

What?

It's nothing.

I... I jammed it in the door.

It's not what it looks like.

This is an issue for security. Bob? Lee?

Come on, Doug.

- You know the drill.
- Guys, come on.

No, guys, come on!

We've all had a lot to drink,
and what with Survivors' Day,

the Sick is on everyone's minds.

It's just a simple mistake.

We can settle this quickly.
Singh, test him.

I left my scanner at the clinic.

It's okay.

I always carry a portable blood test kit
as Neighborhood Watch captain.

Right.

Adi, come on. You know this is ridiculous.

Sh, shh. I hear you.
Let's just get this over with,

and then maybe everyone will calm down.

Yeah?

Hand, please.

Big surprise was supposed to be
I was making pecan pies.

Oh, yeah?

Stay still just a tad longer.

Hey, Doug.

Yeah?

Where'd you get the pecans?

Oh, if I told you, I'd... I'd have to...

What does it say?

What?

No.

No, no.

No, come on!

No, you can't be serious,
you guys. Come on!

This... this has to be a mistake!

Please!

This doesn't have to happen.

Guys!

Where are you go... Don't go!

Please!

Adi? Rani?

- Sorry, Doug.
- Please!

Come on, Singh, how'd Doug get it?

There hasn't been a new wave
of the Sick here in years.

Let's just all take a breath.

We've all been here before.

Another wave's coming, isn't it?

I'm not sure.

♪ Should auld acquaintance be forgot ♪

♪ And never brought to mind? ♪

♪ Should auld acquaintance be forgot ♪

♪ And days of auld lang syne? ♪

That's it, isn't it?

Yeah.

Whoa. It is like a caterpillar.

Rusty was right.

From now on, you got to keep that hat on.

Makes me look stupid.

Wear this hat,
and you might just pass as human.

Hello, my name is
Gustopher Chocolate Dingleberry the Third.

That's not your name.

It's my human name.

Just say "Gus."

Okay, just Gus.

Hello, I'm Gus,
just a regular, boring human boy.

Use your normal voice.
This ain't a game, kid.

Look, if you don't blend in,
you don't make it. You got me?

Now what did we talk about?

If someone thinks I'm a hybrid,
I start talking,

because no one's met
a hybrid that can talk.

And never, ever move my ears.

And most of all,

don't do any weird deer shit.

Come on, kid.

Bad people! Bad people!

Take it easy, kid.

They're not the same ones.

Take it off.

Stand still

Hold up.

Here.

Lithium double A, unexpired.

Go.

Caramel apples.

Hey, kid, you gotta pay for that!

Hey.

Sorry. Sorry.

Put this brat on a leash.

Come on, kid.

Would you stop eating?

Stop eating.

But it said, "Free sample."

But it didn't say keep chomping away
like you're still in the woods.

Is that weird deer shit?

Sorry.

Look, man, stay right here.
I'm gonna go get you a ticket.

Don't go anywhere.

Don't eat anything else,

and don't talk to anyone
unless they talk to you first.

Okay, I get it. Don't do anything at all.

Mm-hmm.

Next.

One for Colorado.

That'll be five MRE tokens.

You're kidding me. It's one way.

So? You know how much easier border
crossing is when you're on the train?

Why you think I'm here?

Look, if you don't have the tokens,
you're gonna have to step aside.

Wait. Wait.

Look, I got three.

Brother, what else you need?
Batteries? Floss? Matches?

Nice boots you got there.

- That ain't gonna happen.
- Not the boots.

The laces.

You're lucky I got a spare pair.

Train leaves at four o'clock.
That's less than half an hour from now.

We blast the whistle three times
15 minutes before leaving,

and twice at five minutes to go.

Have a great trip.

Next.

Act... human.

Red Rocks.

Hey.

Is Richie around?
I haven't seen his booth anywhere.

I was hoping to refill my meds.

Last Men shut him down.

They claimed he wasn't
in compliance with God knows what.

Welcome to Abbot's America.

Man, you just knocked his head off.

Yeah, hit that hybrid right in the face.

This hybrid is going down.

Yeah, screw that half-breed.

Yeah, smash him right in the face!

What are you looking at?

Uh...

What's wrong with this kid?

I'm just a regular human boy. I can talk.

I can see that.

Hey.

Breathe.

Like this.

Are you here alone?

Uh, yeah.

Why don't you come with me?

Let go!

Jepp?

I told you not to talk to anyone.

But I was lost,
and she... she was helping me.

Anyway, I got your ticket.

You can still come with me, you know?

Look, I told you, this is it for us.

Separate ways, remember?

Come on, we better be going.

Have your ID's ready.

Take your hats off...

For the train.

Smells like nuts and maple syrup and corn.

Kettle corn.

Save it for the ride.

You got a long way to go.

They must really like your candy too.

What did you just say?

Those men.

They have lots
of your candy in those boxes.

I can smell, remember?

Huh.

You know what, kid?

I think there's
one last thing we have to do.

But what about the train?

Don't worry, I won't let you miss it.

I promise.

All right, move it up.

Isn't this the wrong train?

Hey, keep it down.

We got a few minutes. Get over here.

Now, where do you smell my candy?

This one.

Atta boy.

Okay, which box?

Everything kind of
smells the same in here.

Close the rest of these up...

You gotta hurry, kid.

It's here. That smell.

- You sure?
- Positive.

Hey.

You're not supposed to be here.

It's okay, kid.

Uh...

He's, you know...

He's sleeping.

Oh, my Lord.

Come on.

All right.

- Are we gonna get in trouble?
- Shut up and follow me.

Come on, man.

Whatever you took,

put it back.

Wait a second.

That's a hybrid!

Come on.

Get your damn ears under control.

- I'm trying!
- Try harder.

I'm not getting caught 'cause of you.
Gotta get you on that train.

Okay, kid.

Colorado's waiting. Don't dawdle.

Get on the train right now.

Go to the furthest carriage
in the back right away,

and don't do any weird deer shit.

What do I do when I get there?

You're Sweet Tooth.
You'll think of something.

Bye, Big Man.

Hybrid! Stop them! That kid
with the horns is a real hybrid. Get him!

No! Help!

Oh!

All aboard!

Last call!

Come on, keep up.

Let's go.

Hey, kid.

You okay?

- Hey, get down.
- Take cover!

- Big Man!
- Stay down.

Ambush!

I can't see them.

You gotta be shittin' me.

Please don't hurt us!

Great leaders are created
in the most unexpected of places.

Come on!

But the worst,

they are made the old-fashioned way.

General Abbot.

I think we found her.

"Her" who?

"Her" her.

Oh.

Well, why didn't you just say so?

Tell the men to start packing.