Supernatural (2005–…): Season 9, Episode 4 - Slumber Party - full transcript

MAN: Charlie Bradbury.

Charlie.

Charlie.

What's up, bitches?

MAN: How does
a high-school dropout
Ripped By mstoll

become
one of the brightest minds

of Roman Inc?

Historically,
I've had this problem with...

with authority.

Is there such thing
as a monster magnet?

When did you become
such an expert?



After you guys left,

I dug into all things
monstrous.

I'm a wee bit obsessive.

If "a wee bit" means
completely.

There is a big difference

between reading about hunting
and actually hunting.

I'm... I'm more hunter
in training.

Totally not worth killing.

You know,
you really should come back

and dig through
our archives.

You are definitely
a Woman of Letters.

I like the sound of that.

MAN: It is the safest
place on Earth.

Warded against
any evil ever created.



It is the supernatural
mother Iode.

If knowledge is power,

then this is the most powerful
place on Earth.

DEAN: Sammy, I think
we found the Bat Cave.

Protocols complete.

James Haggerty.

Peter Jenkins.

Did we do everything
right?

Shouldn't...
(MACHINERY WHIRRING)

It took three years
to build this dump?

Dump?

(SCOFFS)
Dump?

Are you kidding?

Do you realize
where we are?

This... This dump is the last
true beacon of light in...

In a world gone
topsy-turvy.

This dump
is the epicenter of...

Of the ultimate chess match
between Good and Evil.

What a dump.

You know,
when I got this assignment,

I thought there'd be...

I don't know.

Excitement?

Adventure?

There's nothing worse
than adventure, my boy.

Trust me.

(PHONE RINGING)

Extension 765.

Yes.

No.

That's not the password.

There's protocol here,
young lady.

We'll be waiting.

We have a guest.

Damn hunter.

Frank's kid.

Really?

Wow.

What he did for her, that...

That was really something.

It was something all right.

(DOOR CREAKS OPEN)

(DOOR CLOSES)

PETER: Holy buckets.

It's really you.

That's right, rookie,
it's really me.

Dorothy.

Now which one of you
geniuses

is gonna help me
kill the Wicked Witch?

(DOORS OPENING)

Hello, Moose.

You want more Demon names?

I want a room
with a view.

We can discuss this.

I'd settle
for stretching my legs.

Bollocks.

Hey.

How'd it go with Kevin?

(SIGHS)
Well, that little nerd is

in a lovely warded motel room
in Branson.

He's got about 48 hours
of pay-per-porn

and Kenny Rogers
ahead of him.

How's he feeling?

Well, he stared
at the Angel Tablet

and repeated the word 'falafel'
for the entire ride.

Kid's cracked.

I'm hoping this break will, uh,
clear his head.

You know, after
everything that happened,

I figured we could use
a little break ourselves,

so I, uh, picked you up

Season one,
Game of Thrones,

figured we'd get
a little takeout.

All right, well, first,

I think I might have found
a way to help Cass.

What, did you talk to him?

No.

And by the way,

I still don't understand
why he left in the first place.

I mean, the bunker
is the safest place for him.

Bartholomew and

who knows
how many other Angels

are out there
gunning for him.

Hey.
Look.

Nobody wants him here
more than I do, okay?

But, uh,

he felt like he'd bring trouble
down on us,

so he had to split.

But if you got a way
to help him,

I'm all ears.

All right.

So Kevin said the table lit up
like a Christmas Tree

when the Angels fell,
right?

So?

So it turns out
each light

was where
a cluster of Angels fell.

So I'm thinking,

maybe there's some way
to hotwire this.

Make it track Angels.

That way we could help
Cass steer clear of danger.

This was your idea?

Do you see
anybody else in here?

So how would it work?

No idea.

See, at first I thought
the table was the computer,

but it's not.

It turns out
it's just part of it.

But I did find these cables
underneath it

and I followed them.

You're never gonna believe
what I found.

Voila.

- This is a computer?
- Yeah.

Uh, it was, in 1951
when it was installed.

Now here's
the crazy thing.

It's not plugged
into anything.

I mean,
I have no idea

what's making
this thing work.

It's warm here.

Got it.

- Huh.
- Well, that looks simple.

SAM: Does it come
with a manual?

Got nothing
in the archives.

And I obviously
couldn't find anything

like it online.

Not to mention,
I'm pretty sure

that the Men of Letters
doesn't exactly have

IT support anymore,
either.

I think I know somebody
who can help us.

Come on.

So, what do you have to say
for yourself?

Nothing.

I cut out her tongue.

I've bound her,
but it won't last.

Wait,
you captured her?

All by yourself?

DOROTHY: Yes.

Despite all my lady parts,

I managed to capture
the Wicked Witch.

Well, your father
would be very proud.

I mean,
did you know that he...

Wasted my time
with his words

and I'd appreciate it
if you didn't do the same.

Now.

I have tried cutting off
her head, burning her,

dousing her
with holy water.

All she did was laugh.

Nothing I know
of can kill her.

So I'm here
as a last resort.

I was hoping you stiffs
have a way to kill someone

from Oz.

Well, of course we do.

I... We... We have to.

Uh, this place is
the last true beacon of light.

All right.

Just open your damn books,
already.

JAMES: All right, Jenkins.

Let's go to work.

Look who it is.

Hey!

Thanks for coming.

Not a problem.

Especially since I got fired
last week.

Hey, what?
What happened?

Turns out the company
I worked for

was outsourcing
to child labor.

So, took a big Wikileak
all over that.

And yeah.

It's cool, though.

It's given me more time
to focus on my hobbies.

Like LARPing,

macrame,

and hunting.

- Excuse me?
- Okay.

It was just a couple
little cases.

I took down
a teenaged vampire and a ghost.

Which sounds like
a YA novel

if you say it out loud.

Charlie.

How'd it go?

It was...

It was intense,

but I kind of wish...

...hunting was more magical.

You know?

Never mind.

So where's this Commodore 64
of yours?

Sweet Ada Lovelace.

This thing
belongs in a museum.

I mean,
it's got encryption software,

it seems to be powered
by something magical.

Skip to the end.

It's kind of
an alarm system.

Global badness?

It freaks.

This computer
is what locked this place down.

Can we use it
to track Angels?

All right,

let me see what I can do.

All right, it took some doing,
but now,

we can download.

This beast has
all the Men of Letters' files.

Time for a little
drag and drop.

SAM: Wow.

Well, that's a start.

Thank you.

Um, that's...
That's great.

So you've been hunting.

Alone.

I know.

Not a good idea according
to the Supernatural books.

You really can't delete those
from the internet?

Not even I could do that.

I mean, come on.

Where do you even find them?

Atop secret place
I call Amazon.

And someone uploaded
all the unpublished works.

I thought
it was fan-fic at first,

but it was clearly
Edlund's work.

Who uploaded it?

I don't know.

Their screen name was
BeckyWinchester176.

- Ring a bell?
- None.

Uh, nobody's...

No, there are no bells.

Uh, no.

Uh, these files
are encrypted,

this is gonna take a while.

So.

Takeout?

Sleepover?
Braid each others' hair?

I've got an idea.

(SWORDPLAY, CLANGING ON TV)
(SIGHS)

Wow,
that Joffrey's a dick.

Oh, you have no idea.
Wait until he...

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Spoilers.

I haven't read
all the books yet.

You're gonna
read the books?

Yes, Dean,
I like to read books.

You know,
the ones without pictures?

CHARLIE: Man.

This bed is about
as comfortable as a brick.

Any plans on moving in
anytime soon?

I am moved in.

This is just my style.

Yeah,
this is his, uh, style.

Well, I'm sorry
I haven't hung up the, uh,

"Hang in there, Kitty" poster
yet, Dean.

Feel free to redecorate.

So, what,
our home's not good enough

for the "Hang in there,
Kitty" poster?

This isn't our home,
this is where we work.

What's the difference?

Okay.

(CLEARS THROAT)
All right,

well, I'm gonna go get us
some more beers.

How about that?

(DOOR CLOSES)

So, Charlie,

what was all that about
how hunting isn't magical?

Saving people.
Hunting things.

The family business?

I am down.

But I was raised
on Tolkein, man.

I mean, where is all this?

Where are
my White Walkers,

and my volcano and magic ring
to throw in the damn thing?

Where...

Where's my quest?

Magic?

Quests?

Suck.
Trust me.

They're all...

Dead ends.

Nothing but dead ends.

There's got to be
some way to kill this thing.

Jenkins, don't!

(DEEP, DISTORTED VOICE)
Something here belongs to me.

Take me to it.

What the hell
is it talking about?

I have no idea.

Do you have a lab?

Second floor.
Room 28.

Wait!

(JAMES GROANING)

Jenkins.

Jenkins.

I know you're in there.

Jenkins is gone.

Jenkins.

Jenkins.

You...
You were right.

There's nothing worse
than adventure.

Dorothy!

Dorothy!

Download should be done
by now.

What the hell?

Sam, give me a hand.

(CHARLIE GASPS)

(GASPS)

CHARLIE: Holy crap.

The first case investigated
in this bunker involved Dorothy.

She and the Witch
came into this room

and they never came out.

This will never stop
blowing my mind.

Okay, pace yourself, Toto.

CHARLIE: Oz is real.

It's part of the fairy world.

We have to find her.

No we need to talk before
anyone does anything, okay?

Dorothy?

DOROTHY: Talk.

Oh, typical Men of Letters.

Standing around
having a nice little chat,

with your noses
buried in your books

while your little secretary
takes notes.

We're Hunters.

And who are you
calling a secretary?

You're not a secretary?

You're a Woman of Letters?

How long have I been out?

That's why we need to talk.

Look, you've been gone
for over 75 years.

Now according to our files,
you came here

to kill the Wicked Witch
and then disappeared.

What happened?

We couldn't find a way
to kill her.

So I did the only thing
that I could.

It's you and me forever,
bitch.

(GASPING)

Dorothy?

Dorothy?

DOROTHY: A binding spell
that came at a price.

Her soul with mine.

So you've been frozen
with the Witch

for all this time?

Yes.

Look.

The Witch cannot be killed.

If I'm awake,
then so is she.

MAN: Hello, lovely.

(GROANS)

Sorry.

This litter box is warded
against everything.

Even Wicked Witches.

Big fan.

Love your work.

What's the matter,
darling?

Cowardly Lion
got your tongue?

(GROWLS)

Right, enough chit-chat.

You must be here
for a reason.

Write it down
so Daddy can help.

Wait, if she's here,
why didn't she kill you?

She can't.

You're protected, by the Witch
of the North's kiss.

It's from the books.

Oh, forget the books.

They're not important.

I'm protected,
you aren't.

Now the Witch came here
looking for something.

I have no idea what it is,
but we have to find her,

before she finds it.

All right, all right.
Charlie, dig into the files.

See if you can find anything
that puts a dent in a Witch.

Sam and I will
have a look-see, come on.

- I'm helping.
- Yeah, I don't doubt it.

But for right now,
why don't you rest up

and help the smartest person
in the room.

So.

- Big fan.
- Hm.

Ozma of Oz...

Is a total ass.

You were much nicer
in the books.

Those books are the ravings
of a sad old man, my father.

Wait.

Your dad was L. Frank Baum?
The writer?

A Man of Letters.

Another glorified Librarian,
you ask me.

Hey, these guys
may have been sexist,

but like all Librarians,
they were wicked smart too.

The dude who was here
when you came in?

Haggerty?

He kept
your case file open.

Worked it every day
until he retired.

Obviously,
he never found you,

but, if you took
five seconds to read,

he did find a way
to fight the Wicked Witch.

Do you remember the poppy fields
in the first book?

That's not actually
how it happened.

It was much bloodier.

Stop ruining my childhood.

Do you remember the poppies?

Good.

Haggerty made a deal
with a Fairy

and got some poppy extract.

I'm gonna get some bullets
from the gun range

and make us some poppy bullets.

So are you coming
or what?

(CROWLEY WHISTLING
'SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW')

Well.

If it isn't Scarecrow
and the Tin-Man.

Your new house guest,

so misunderstood.

Neither of you saw
Wicked?

What did she say to you?

Something along
the lines of...

(HISSING)

All right, I'm gonna get
some holy oil and a lighter,

dickbag.

I know
what she's looking for.

What does she want?

I'd be happy to tell you.

As soon as
I get to stretch my legs.

Oh...

(EXHALES SHARPLY)
SAM: All right.

What does the Witch want?

Give me a mo'.

Still need
to air myself out.

I think
you're aired out enough.

Rude.

"Key."

What key?

Haven't the foggiest.

Had to send her off
on a merry chase

before she could melt me.

Told her you boys
kept the keys in the kitchen.

You do have a kitchen
in this craphole, don't you?

Damn it.

I just cleaned in here.

Really?

Looks like
we got a witch here.

Sorry.

We raided your gun range.

Made us
some poppy bullets.

They won't kill the Witch,

but they will stun the crap
out of her.

That's my girl.

There was only enough
for four bullets,

so...

make each shot count.

Now we just have
to find her

before she finds whatever
the hell she's looking for.

She's looking for a key.

Well, how do you know?

Little birdie told us.

Ring any bells, Dorothy?

Unfortunately.

It's the Key to Oz.

There are magical ways
into Oz.

Tornado, eye of a hurricane,
whirlpool.

But this key will turn any
locked door

into a portal to Oz.

Insert the Key,
twist, and presto,

you're in Oz.

Well, how did the Men of Letters
get the key?

I have no idea,

but if she finds it,
she'll go back

and finish
what she started.

She'll destroy
all that's good in Oz.

She's got armies of Witches,

flying monkeys.

Many will die.

What's this key look like?

I've seen that key.

I found it
when I was doing inventory.

Where is it now?

My room.

We got to get to that key.
All right.

Charlie, and I will
go look in my room.

Why don't you guys
buy us some time.

Charlie,

the safest place
in this joint is the dungeon.

You have a dungeon
in this place?

Of course you do.

So maybe you should...

I am not hiding.

Especially in a dungeon.

Wicked Witch?

A key?
A quest?

Let's do this.

Char... Charlie?

I can't believe
I've lived here for 75 years.

How long have you called
this place home?

My brother calls it home.

Me, I, uh...

I haven't that much
luck with homes.

Me neither.

Overrated, you ask me.

Yellow bricks or not,
give me the open road any day.

Sam!

(SCREAMING)

She can get anywhere
from there.

Split up,
cover more ground.

You keep your porn meticulously
organized, but not...

Don't judge me.

Ah!

Yahtzee.

(GASPS)
Dean!

No!

(SHRIEKS)

Charlie?

Charlie?

Charlie!

Charlie.

Charlie.

Charlie.

No!

SAM: Dean?

Zeke!

You have to help her.

She's gone.

No,
you can bring her back,

like you did with Cass.

I cannot
keep doing that.

Why the hell not?

I am barely
back to half strength, Dean.

Every time I use my power,
it weakens me.

Which means I will have
to stay in your brother

longer than you want.

Longer than we both want.

The Witch running around
your bunker is very powerful.

I can help with the Witch
or save your friend.

Save her.

As you wish.

(GASPS)

Merry Christmas!

Charlie?

Hi.

Yeah, I know you.

I told you to stay
in the Dungeon.

I bet you say that
to all the girls.

Dean?

Sammy?

What the hell just happened?

The Witch...

The Witch was about to
put a whammy on me.

And, uh,
Charlie jumped in front.

She got zapped.

Then the Witch
got the drop on you.

Then why aren't we dead?

That's a good question.

I...

I clipped her with a...
With a poppy bullet,

but she got the Key.

I think she's gone.

No.
She's wounded.

We should still have some time,

she could still be
in the air vents.

No.
She's right.

We have to...
We...

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Just go.
We'll catch up.

My... My gun's over there.

There's one bullet in it.

Can we be
best friends now?

Who's Zeke?

What?

When I came
into your room,

before I got zapped,

I thought you said
the name Zeke.

- Who's that?
- Um...

I think you're still
a little punchy, man.

Let's just keep moving.

I had the weirdest dream
when I was out.

It... It was Christmas

and my parents
were still alive and...

Dream?

Charlie, you died.

Don't worry about it,
though.

You're not a real hunter
until you've died

and come back again.

Slow down.

Why would you think
I died?

Heaven?

It's your dream life.

And if you were zapped
by the Wicked Witch,

instant death.
I would know.

She killed me too.

Okay.

Let's rewind here a bit.

When did you die?

In Oz.

My father was obsessed
with his work

as a Man of Letters.

And then I was born
and nothing changed.

He would keep
his work a secret,

but I was
such a curious kid.

I was always
looking for trouble,

looking
for the next big adventure.

- I know the feeling.
- Hm.

I stowed away
on one of his cases.

Wound up
in the Emerald City.

Accidentally
got left behind.

It was terrifying.

Well, what happened?

I met up with
these three freedom fighters.

And they thought
I was this child of destiny,

chosen to kill
the Wicked Witch.

They protected me.

And then the Witch
turned them into...

A Scarecrow,
a Tin Man and a Lion?

And then she hunted me down.

And killed me.

Yeah, that never
made it to the books.

Sometimes real life
is darker than fiction.

Hey, why haven't
you moved in?

Is now really the time
for this, Dean?

Well, just asking.

Look, I never had what you had
with Mom and Dad, okay?

What are you talking about?

I don't have
any memories of home.

And whenever I've tried
to make a home of my own,

it really hasn't ended well.

Yeah, but a lifetime
of abandoned buildings

and crappy motel rooms?

I mean, this is about
as close to a home

as we're gonna get.

And it's ours.

And what about the books?

Revisionist history.

That's my father's way
of trying to undo

what had happened to me.

But I knew the truth.

When the Witch
came to our world,

I became a Hunter

and my father
wrote those silly books.

Don't you get it?

The books aren't silly,
they're guide books,

filled with clues
he left for you.

Haggerty
poured through each one,

and his research led him
to uncover the poppies.

So maybe there's something else
from the books we can use.

Preferably something
with a pointy end.

You are a genius.

Come on.
We've got to get to the garage.

There's a garage
in this place?

Oh, boy!

Clear!

I got nothing!

What do you think?

Is she gone?

Sam!

(DISTORTED) Find the girls.

(DISTORTED) And kill them both.

Yes, I knew those boy
scouts would keep it for me.

Is that...

Yeah.

He didn't make it.

Please be here.

Please be here.

Yes!

I don't believe it.

Did you really
walk down a brick road in these?

No, I never
actually wore them.

Seemed kind of tacky
wearing a dead woman's shoes.

Plus, I'm no good in heels,
you know?

I don't suppose
we could just wish her away.

Sorry.

Another thing
the books got wrong.

But like the poppies,
these have magic from Oz.

Sharp magic.

Hm... Death by shoe.
(CHUCKLES)

(DISTORTED, DEEP VOICE)
There you are.

Was that your Batman voice?

That's definitely
not your Batman voice.

DOROTHY: It's her.

She possessed
the both of them.

I've missed you,
my pretty.

Killing you a second time

will be just
as sweet as the first.

Guys.

I know you're in there.

Dean, you can't
let the Witch do this.

If she opens the door,
she's going to destroy Oz.

(GASPING BREATHS)

I have no intention
of escaping to Oz.

I'm going to bring
my armies here.

(CHUCKLING)

(GASPS)

(CACKLING)

(DEEP, DISTORTED VOICE)
Don't worry.

You'll join Dorothy
right after you watch her die.

Sorry about the nards,
Dean.

(GRUNTS)

Go.

I'll buy you some time.

All right.

Let's see what you
pencil necks are made of.

(OVERLAPPING SCREAMS)

All right, let's do this
the old fashioned way.

My body cannot hurt you,
Dorothy.

But theirs can.

(THUD)

Now heel.

What the hell
just happened?

Charlie.

(SCREECHING)

(PANTING)

(DOOR OPENS)

Ding-dong, bitches.

Ah!

(COUGHS)
Really?

After all I did
with Miss Defying Gravity?

(DOOR CLOSES)

Bollocks.

Baby looks good in here,
huh?

Not bad.

Dean.

Dorothy.

I... I found something
in the archives.

I'm sure
belongs to you.

You have no idea
how odd it is

having a series of books
written about you.

Actually,
I do know.

And it is
definitely weird.

But you know what?
End of the day,

it's our story.
So we get to write it.

So.

Thanks
for the slumber party.

And for bringing me
back from the dead.

Uh, I didn't.

Don't BS a BSer.

Am I a zombie now?

Do I need to eat brains?

No.
No.

No.
You're you.

You're gonna be fine,
all right?

Just, um...

Just keep this between us,
okay?

All right.

But only because
you raised me from the dead,

which you're going
to have to explain to me later.

All right.

Not bad
for a bunch of Librarians.

Hm.

Mind keeping an eye
on my bike for me?

DEAN: Yeah.
Yeah.

As long as
you don't mind me

taking it for a spin
every once in a while.

Deal.

Thank you.

For everything.

Now if you'll excuse me,

I have a rebellion
to finish.

So you coming or what?

What?
With you?

To Oz?

Yeah, you said
you were looking for adventure.

Well, here it is, Red.

Come help me
find my damn dog.

You have no idea
what's in Oz.

I mean, there's...
there's flying monkeys.

Armies of witches.
There's all kinds of danger.

Promise?

If you need anything,
just...

tap your heels together
three times, okay?

Me?

What about you crazy kids?

You gonna be all right
without me?

Take care of yourselves,
boys.

Think she'll be back?

Of course.

There's no place
like home.
Ripped By mstoll

(English US - SDH)