Supernatural (2005–…): Season 13, Episode 8 - The Scorpion and the Frog - full transcript

The Winchesters agree to steal a trunk belonging to a demon in exchange for a spell they can use to find Jack.

I found a case.

I've got this. No, Jack. Jack.

I killed someone.

If I stay, I'm gonna hurt you.

I have to go.

It's bad enough the Winchesters
were babysitting my son.

But then they managed
to lose him,

with Heaven, Hell,
and everything in between

hunting him down?

I am Asmodeus.

I will definitely need
that nephilim.

Is that... Ketch.

I'm Alexander, his twin.

What's become of your angel?

Not sure, but I am sure
about you, Arthur.

Did it ever occur to you, Dean,

that I might actually be
one of the good guys?

No. Not even once.

Jack's off the grid.
We'll find him.

I swore
I would protect this boy.

Let me do this.

Your attention, please.

The museum will close
in 15 minutes.

The museum
will close in 15 minutes.

Excuse me? Madam?

You're not allowed down here.

Well done.

How do you think Asmodeus
will reward us?

Yeah? Dean Winchester?

Who's this?

I have something you might
be interested in.

I think she's clean.

Anything on Ketch?

No. Checked every hospital
in a 50mile radius. Nada.

Crazy son of a bitch
probably pulled the bullet out

with his teeth. Yeah.

What about Jack?

I talked to Cass.
He's got nothing.

It's like... We gotta
find something in the lore

or wait for Jack to make
a mistake.

Yeah, well, the "mistakes" are
what I'm worried about.

Yeah? Dean Winchester?

Who's this?

I have something you might
be interested in.

No, we're happy with our
cable provider. Thank you.

What about your nephilim?

Word on the street is
he's gone rogue.

Yeah? What street is that?

Hell Street. Hell Avenue.

Just Hell, really.


What if I told you I had a way
to find your boy?

Meet me at Smile Diner at 12:45.

You know, this could be a trap.

I mean he could work
for Asmodeus.

Yeah, but what if
he's telling the truth?

You know, after Crowley,
I told myself, no more demons.

Dean, we don't even know
what this guy's deal is.

Yeah, we do.
He's a freakin' demon.

Yeah, but you said it yourself,
we need a miracle.

And maybe this is it.

You know what "miracles" are
called from demons?

I don't know, but I'm pretty
sure it's not "miracles."

How about this?
Let's hear the guy out.

All right, and after that,
we kill him.

The famous Winchesters.

Some random demon.

Barthamus. Bart's fine.
Please, sit.

I ordered cherry pie.

Well, Bart, don't know what
you've heard about us, but...

Everything. I've been following
your careers a long time.

You're a real pain
in the pitchfork.

And the halo.

Natural disrupters. We have
that in common, you and I.

Yeah, we're twinsies.

All right. You said you have
something for us?

That is a genuine

nephilim... tracking spell.

Yeah, and I just won
the Powerball.

You don't believe me. Ya think?

Wait a second.
Even if this is real...

It's real.

Why would you give it to us?

I'm a crossroads demon, Sam.

After Crowley's promotion
to King of Hell,

the crossroads demon.

Helping people's what I do,
my raison d'être.


Okay, look, we've been around
long enough to know

nothing's ever free.

So what's the catch? You got me.

I do need something in return.
Call it a favor.

Yeah, but you already
gave us the spell.

Half the spell.
That's half the spell.

The other half is... elsewhere.

But I'll happily hand it over
once we're done.

Well, see, here's the thing.

When a demon tells us to jump,
we don't ask how high.

We just ice their ass.

How very "Dean" of you.

Sam, do me a favor.
You're the smart one.

Look into that.

I'll be in touch.

What's the verdict?

The spell...

I think it checks out.

I put together
a rough translation.

Um, it's Canaanite.

Dates back to the time
of King Solomon,

who apparently commissioned it

to keep tabs on
the Queen of Sheba,

who, according to the lore,
was halfangel.

She was a nephilim?

So what you're saying is that
King Solomon created a spell

so that she could stalk
his girlfriend.

Yeah. And it looks like
it works.

Or it would work...
If we had the other half,

which, without it,
we got nothing.

Pretty much. Great.

Look, whatever
game Bart is playing,

III don't wanna play it, but...

Sam, you know that these things
don't usually go our way.

It doesn't matter.

Jack is out there, in the world,

and he's alone and he's scared
and he's dangerous.

And if this is our chance
to find him...

we have to take it.

Relax. They'll be here.

Sam. Dean. Welcome.

Who are your friends?

I'm sorry. I should've told you.
These are my associates.

This young lady is Smash.

And this is Grab. Hiya.

Smash and Grab? Really?

Not our real names.

No kidding.

Smash can crack any safe
built by man.

And Grab's a demon, expert in
bypassing supernatural security.

Wait. Safecracking?
What is this, a heist?

Hold up. Is this a heist?

His name is Luther Shrike.

Lives offgrid.

Paranoid, agoraphobic.
You might call him a hoarder.

Has a rabid appetite
for collecting

rare supernatural objects,

including something of mine.

All right,
so what are we talkin'?

Your favorite My Little Pony?


What I want is in
a mahogany trunk, in a safe,

locked in a vault room, hidden
somewhere on Shrike's farm.

I want you to find my property
and bring it back to me.

What's in the safe?

Why don't you rob him yourself?

If I could, I would.
Farm's warded inside and out.

Grab can locate the vault room,

but the only thing
that can actually open it

is the blood of a man
who's been to Hell and back.

Tell me, Dean, do you know
any men like that?

Somebody help me!


Well, here.
Why don't you just take it?

Then you can give us
the rest of the spell.

I'm afraid it needs to be
straight from the tap.

And I don't just need
your blood. I need you.

You see, when it comes
to Shrike,

there's what I know
and what I don't know.

Now Grab can locate the vault,
Smash can crack the safe.

But there will be curveballs.

And you boys, well,
you tend to hit those...

right out of the park.

Okay, tell me.

How does Shrike get
into his vault?

He uses his own blood.

So he's been to Hell.
What's he, a demon?

Luther gets around,
but he is human.

Not one of the good ones.
He's a sadist,

a murderer who'll do anything
and everything to add to his collection.

All right, seriously,
what does he have of yours?

It's important to me.
That's all you need to know.

Sorry. That's not good enough.

Put it another way...

Take the deal, or I give
the spell to Asmodeus.

I made a copy of your half,

Did I neglect to mention that
he's looking for your boy, too?

But here's the thing...
I don't trust him.

Of course, I don't trust you
either, but I trust him less,

so you get dibs.

For now.

All right, well, I've seen
this movie a thousand times.

Some asshat too fancy
to get his hands dirty

plans a job, swears it'll
all go smooth,

and it does... until bang!

And everything goes
screaming off the rails,

and it's our asses. Dean...

You know he's gonna screw us
over the first chance he gets.

Not if we screw him over first.

Listen, we want
that spell, right?

I mean, we need that spell.

We definitely don't want Asmodeus
getting his hands on it.

So let's do this,

have him hand over
the other half of the spell...

And then?

And then, like you said...

we kill him.


Peace made?

Yeah, you could say that.

All right, look,
if we're doing this,

finding the vault's gonna
take time.

We need a distraction,
something to keep Shrike busy.

I'm all ears.

See, boys, it's kismet,
us working together.

Shrike'll never see us coming.

They're coming.

Asmodeus isn't your enemy.

He wants to use me as bait.

Barthamus is coming, Luther.

All Asmodeus asks is when
he shows his traitor face,

you give us a call.

I could.


Exorcizamus Te,

omnis immundus spiritus.

You're making a mistake!

Adiuramus Te,

cessa decipere
humanas creaturas,

eisque aeternae
perditionis venenum propinare!

Tell your boss I don't
take orders. I give 'em.

If he or Barthamus... if anyone
comes near me, I'm ready.

It's, John Dortmunder.

- We... we emailed about my...
- family heirloom.

Hey, Winona.

The '90s called. They'd like
their shoes back.



Dean? Yeah?

Don't get dead.

You, too.

Let's go.

I'm in here.

Come on.

You're weird.

That Nerve Damage?


I used to live on that crap
when I was a kid.

It's, like, 10 times the legal
limit of caffeine, right?

Didn't know they made that



So... safecracking.

So... hunting.

You know, I probably
don't have to tell you this,

but working for demons
is not a smart idea.

You're working for demons.

Yeah, well, I don't really
have a choice.


You get in some kind of trouble
or somethin'?

How long does
a demon summoning spell take?


All right, so where's
this vault room?

Don't know.


It's hidden under
a cloaking spell.


Don't worry, Chief. I got this.

- Or should I say...
- You got this.


Your blood, it's like
a dowsing rod.

The vault wants it. You have it.

Like attracts like, comprende?

Wait, so you're saying that I'm
some sort of a vault compass?

You said he was
just a pretty face.


Okay, what now?


Sanguis infernus, anima nunc.

Viam manifesta.

Sanguis inferne, viam ostende.

Dude! What...


I guess we gotta go that way.

Homemade gin.

It'll blow your whistle.


I don't get out much.

Um... I gotta say,

you have a very impressive

Ever seen a "fang of
the Basilisk"?

Actually, that's not, um...

So whoever sold you this
to you had it wrong.

Basilisk fangs are hollow.

This is actually a Gorgon tooth.

It's still really cool, though.

You know, I would love to see
more of your collection.

Let's stick to business.
What you got?

Of course. Um, okay.

So what I brought today

is very special.

It's very rare.

It's oneofakind.

A knife that can kill demons.

I hate this.

I hate this! I hate you!

No one cares. How much longer?

Takes as long as it takes.

Okay, well, if something
happens to my brother

while we're out here
dealing with this crap...

Hey, a little respect? It took
years to perfect that spell.

If your brother's too stupid to
do his part, then that's on him.

What'd you say?

Son of a bitch.

No lock. Well, that's
never a good sign.

Vault's gotta be down there.

I'm not going down there.
I've already done my bit.

This is on you, hand puppet.

I will kill you.

I bet you say that
to all the girls.


All right.

This is the vault room.
Where's the safe?

Behind that door.

And I'm supposed
to use my blood how?

I think you're supposed
to put your paw in there.

What, are you kidding me?

So what's your price?

You know, what we agreed to
in the email is... is fine.

Of course.


we both know you're
not really here for this.

Sorry? II don't... understand.

Bart sent you.

You're here to rob me, right?

No, no, no. You got it wrong.

I don't think so, demon.

You're the distraction, right?

Got your friends out there,
stripping me blind as we speak.

Bart didn't tell you?

As long as I'm on the property,
I can't die.


I mean, there could
be anything in there.

Anything, right?
There could be spiders.

There could be
the spiny blade thing...

Snakes. Spiders.

- You don't even know, do you?
- Correct.


How about this?
What if I cut myself,

put it on, like,
a little piece of paper?

We'll just wad it up and throw
it in the mouth, okay? Okay.


Going in. Do it.

I... Aah!

It got me! It...

You gonna live?


What the hell was that?

The curveball.

Yo! How's it goin'?

- Did Bart mention anything to you about this?
- No.


Really? Not gonna answer?

Just ignore ol' Grab. Typical.

There was supposed to be a safe,

not some Dollar Store
Indiana Jones crap!

Dean... What?

Son of a bitch.



My brother, where is he?

Alive, far as I left him.

Thought he was a demon.

Guess Bart's got humans
doing his dirty work now.

Well, looks like
gun beats knife,

so how about you hand over
the safe,

and then we'll all be home in
time to watch "Game of Thrones."

I'm more of a book guy.


He's immortal!

Well, good thing he's got
a glass jaw.

All right, jackass,
this is how it's gonna go.

You can tell us how to get past
your little booby trap in here,

and then you're safe, all right?

Sorry, son.

That riddle in there?
You'll never crack it.

And if you try,
you'll find yourself

on the business end
of a thousand tiny darts,

each tipped with silver

and filled with arsenic,
holy water, and holy oil.

Gentlemen, I wish you
good fortune!

And I wish you'd shut up.

Where are you running off to?

Everything went sideways.

Grab is dead.
The Winchesters, too, probably.

And? And what?

Job cancelled. Game over.

Alice, just because I like you
doesn't mean I'm willing

to renegotiate the terms
of your deal.

So? I'll do another job.

I'll make it up to you.

Just tell me what
you want me to do.

All right, so what are
we looking at here?

Some sort of an ancient
hoodoo disco floor?

No, II think it's like a...
Like a giant keypad.

Like we have
to walk over the tiles

in a very specific order...

An order which
only Shrike knows.

Yeah, well,
Shrike's not talking,

so I guess we wing it.

Wing it?

Dean, these... these aren't like
the lasers in "Entrapment."

There are infinite
possible combinations...

and pressurereleased darts.

Did you just say "Entrapment"?

I don't know. I mean, I don't...

I don't watch a whole lot
of those kinds of movies.

Yeah, but you saw "Entrapment"?

Catherine Zeta Jones.

I think I just...


I just got an idea,

but it's a little crazy.

I'm good with crazy.

I told you, you'd help.


On three.



That was awesome!

All right, Shrike's all
tied back up.

- Man, is he pissed.
- Yeah, wouldn't you be?

How we lookin'? Can you open it?

Dean, I bet
no one's seen a safe like that

in over a hundred years.

I have.

Look who decided to show.

Why'd you cottontail?

You think I wanna be here?
Like I have a choice?

You made a deal.

Wow! You think?

You sold your soul.

And if I could take it back,
I would.

But sorry, Charlie. I can't.

So here I am.

And as long as I keep working
for him, Bart never collects.

So you gonna let me
do my thing or what?

Look, it doesn't have
to be that way.

You know, we could help you.
No, you can't.

I gotta take care of me.

How long does this usually...


Let's go?!



Who cares? Let's blow
this pop stand.

Does this guy ever stop?

You wanna handle this?!

On it!

Get out of the truck!
Don't try anything funny.

Get out!

It make you feel good, whoring
yourselves out to pure evil?

Because that's what he is.

What he did to me,
my little boy...

What are you talking about?
My son.

He was sick, dying.

So I found Bart and I traded
my life for his.

My boy got better,

but then a few years later,
he died anyway.

He drowned.

You know what Bart told me then?

He said, "Accidents happen,"

that he "couldn't
be held responsible."

So what did you do?

When the hounds came
and dragged me to Hell,

I negotiated a new deal.

How? Leverage.

What kind of leverage?

Look in the trunk.

Bart's bones.

You burn them, he dies.

That's my leverage.

You're on the wrong side
of this, boys.

You gotta ask yourselves
if you can live with that.


You never should've left
the house.

Trust me, he had it coming.

You let his son die.

Well, he didn't read
the fine print,

and I am a businessman.
Speaking of which...


Little something
for a job well done.

Don't be shy. Come on.

Yeah. And for you boys...

The spell. You earned it.



Let me see if I understand.

You two dogooding idiots are
willing to welch on our deal,

throw away the only chance
you have at finding your boy,

because I killed a 200yearold
blackmailing piece of garbage?

Is that it?

Yeah, that,

and we just don't like you.

Time to reopen negotiations, shall we?

Give me my bones,
and the girl lives.

Or try to burn them,
and the moment before I die...

I'll snap her neck like kindling.

It's amazing what I can do
in a halfsecond's time.



Slide it out, please.

My dear...

You're all right.

Would you mind?

You could've had this.
It was almost all yours.

But no, you just couldn't
make it easy, could you?

I'm sorry.

It's all right.

You gotta take care
of you. Right?

Sweet, really.

Take care of you.

Alice, chop chop!


Aah! Aah!

The spell! The spell!

Thanks for the ride.

You gonna be okay?

Yeah. I'm gonna be good.

Hey, I just wanted to say...
I'm sorry.

What you did for me...

you didn't have to do that.

Thank you, seriously.

See ya around.

Hey, Alice.

Stay weird.


You okay?

Yeah, not really.

Not exactly the best day,
you know?

Well, it's not the worst.

We did save somebody.
That felt good.

Yeah. Yeah, it did. But...

back to square one with Jack.

We'll figure something else out.

And if that doesn't work,
then we'll move on to next,

and then whatever's after that.

We just keep working,
'cause it's what we do.

It feels really good to hear you
talk like that again.

I'll drink to that.

== sync, corrected by elderman ==