Supernatural (2005–…): Season 13, Episode 13 - Devil's Bargain - full transcript

"Devil's Bargain" Dean, Castiel and Sam search for Lucifer who, meanwhile, strikes an unlikely deal with a local faith healer named Sister Jo. Asmodeus gets closer to finding Jack.

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Michael is a monster? Pure evil?

That paradise you left behind?

I believe I'll take up
residence.

Sort of need that
pesky little rift.

I've assembled all the elements
annotated in the angel tablets.

The key ingredient...
Archangel grace.

This better work.

Ouch.

Asmodeus was
my weakest creation.

Doesn't seem that weak to me.

That whole shapeshifty
thing he does?



II didn't give him that.

Cass? What's happening?

I'll fill
you in when I know more.

Someone got mad
and broke his warding.

Good times.

Jack is gone. Mom is
trapped in another reality.

We'll figure it out.

Dean, we don't have a plan.
So, how?

I don't know, but we will.

This would be so much easier

if somebody would be a pal

and let me eat a little
of his grace.

Come on, Castiel.
We just fought side by side.

You gotta trust me now, man.



Aah!

Told you I found a body.

See? Dead.

Lucifer!

Where are you?

- Oops!
- Whoa!

Whoa!

I think I just fell for you.

I'll catch you any time
you fall.

Thanks.

Nice job.

Another happy beginning.

Right...

Cupid?

== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elderman.

Yeah.

That's very good.

But I need seconds.

Where can I find more angels?

Where do I find more angels?

I don't know.

There... there... there
aren't mmany of us left.

Don't lie to me.

I'm not.

Please. Please.

Please. No.

Okay. Okay, Cupid.

Don't cry.

You know, without your grace,
you're only human,

so you should be careful.

Accidents can happen.

Like that.

Sorry.

Let me get this straight.

You were kidnapped weeks ago,
locked up.

Cass, I just talked to you
on the phone.

No. No.

Asmodeus had my phone.
You've been talking to him.

What did he want with you?

Well, they mostly wanted
Lucifer. I just...

I just happened to be
in proximity.

Lucifer? No, no, no, he...
No, no, no.

We slammed his ass back in
the Apocalypse World. How did...

Kevin Tran. Kevin Tran?

The Apocalypse World
version, yes.

He managed to open a rift
using Lucifer's grace.

They have an angel tablet?

Yes.

And the Archangel Michael...

Again, Apocalypse World
version...

He wants to use the spell
to invade and conquer our world.

That's why I met with Lucifer.

So you met w...

Cass, I specifically told you
not to do anything stupid.

Well, he was weak,

and given the context of
our imminent annihilation,

it didn't seem stupid.

Lucifer wanted to help
fight Michael.

Yeah. Right.
Lucifer wanted to help. Sure.

If he were lying,
I'd have known it.

He was... he was scared.

But Asmodeus showed up before we
could finish our conversation.

And when we finally
managed to escape,

Lucifer did try to kill me.

Well, so much for helping.

He say anything about our mom?

She's alive.

That's all I know. I'm sorry.

Nothing but humans.

Not a wing flapper in sight.

What? What are ya gawking at?
You never seen

the Prince of Darkness
before, pal?

Turn around. Come on, man.

What?

I hungry?

Ew.

Seriously?

Spare some change, man?

Bless you.

It was a simple task.

All these fools had to do
was keep Lucifer on ice

until I returned
from an important errand.

Frankly, I'm shocked you left.

I believe I said it was
an important errand.

My initial thought was
to take Lucifer prisoner.

That's proven to be...

Monumentally stupid?

Indeed.

So, take two.

I want you to kill him.

Kill... the Devil?

He's runnin' on empty.

Nice angel blade to the heart,
he'll go down.

Probably.

Do it fast, though,
before he fills the tank.

And if he does?

Then I believe we're all dead.

Give me some money.

Come on, man.

Here you go. Thank you, sir.

Gag me.

Money. Or your jacket.

- Money, please.
- Here you go. - Bless you.

Come on!

What's the matter with you?

Hey. Just so you know,
it's your vibe.

It's my vibe?

It's offputting. People don't...

people don't take to you.

Yeah, well, maybe because
this isn't me, all right?

I don't... I don't need money.

Or food or warmth
or dental floss

or any of that crap.

Being human sucks.

Yeah, but...
what's the alternative?

Don't even get me started, pal.

Can I have that, please?

Well... closing time.

Yeah.

You hungry?

Hey, hey, hey. Aren't we going
inside the restaurant there

to... to eat
a little dinner or...

We are. Almost there. Come on.

Come on.
Corelli's lasagna? Kills.

Frankly, it's better
the next day.

Okay, yeah, why don't we,

why don't we take that big pile
of cash you got there,

go inside the restaurant,

and get a dinner
that's botulismlite?

No. That money's going
right into the old leg fund.

The “old leg fund”?

Okay, I got news for you.
Your leg is shot.

No doctor's gonna help you
with that,

so we might as well just...

I'm not blowing my money
on doctors.

I'm gonna see Sister Jo.
“Sister Jo”?

She don't come cheap,
but she can heal anything.

- She's a faith healer.
- Yeah.

Okay, let you down easy?

She's a fake.
They're all fake, man.

No. I've seen it.

Boils, blindness, birth defects.

She touches you,
there's this glow,

and you're cured.

Really?

Yeah.

It's a long shot at best.

Yeah, well,

most of what we do
are long shots.

You get used to it.

Cass, I'm sorry.

All that time you were
with Asmodeus, II...

We should've known
it wasn't you.

Well, he's a shapeshifter.

Besides, II was the one
who got myself captured.

Yeah, but if Sam and I knew,
you know, we would've...

Yeah, I know. I know.
You would've tried another long shot.

I'm fine, Dean.

You sure about that?

Right now, all that matters

is getting Jack and your mother
out of that place.

Okay?

Look, I promised Kelly
that I would protect her son.

I intend to keep that promise.

Hey, there he is!

Donny, how you doing?

The usual.

Bewildered.

Right. Cool. So here's the plan.

We nab Lucifer.

If he is as weak as Cass says,

then the angel cuffs
should work on him.

Yeah. Maybe.

Well, maybe's all we got.

So... we grab Satan,

and we use his grace to open up
a door between two universes.

Okay? Then we get Mom,
we get Jack, and we get out.

Slam the door before
Michael follows us

and destroys our universe.

Now it's gonna be harder
than it sounds.

And so, the spell to open this
rift is in the angel tablet?

Yeah, they... they are, um...

on Earth 2, except...

Except we don't have
the angel tablet anymore.

No, we don't. We do have...

the demon tablet.

We thought it might
mention the spell as well

because it, too,
is the word of God.

And since you speak God,

figured it was
right up your alley.

So give it a swing.

These glyphs,

they're... they're...
They're nearly impenetrable.

Okay. Um...

Well, is there anything
we can get you? Or, um...

Chicken wings. Excuse me?

Chicken wings.

Heavy lifting like this
requires real brain fuel.

My analysis of the halflives
of the 33 arsenic isotopes

required about...

25 buckets.

Cass?

You all right? It's angel radio.

A vessel was found
last night, mutilated.

Wait. Who's killing angels?

Thank you.

Don't be afraid.

You're whole again.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Okay, so according
to the report,

the Vic died from trauma.

Something blunt
driven through the body.

There was also a slit
in his neck, which means...

Lucifer fed on
this angel's grace,

which means he's trying
to restore his power.

And if he does... We're boned.

Epically.

We're closed.

Come back tomorrow.

But I need healin', Sister Jo.

Or should I say Anael.

You're an angel.

Back atcha...

Lucifer.

What? No, “Eek!”?

No “Spare me, Dark Master”...

No quaking fear? Should I quake?

I mean, yeah, most people
sort of do. Yeah.

I'm not most.

Right.

You're special because you
heal people for money.

Not very heavenly,
I have to say.

We're not in Heaven.
We're on Earth.

You may have noticed,
around here,

good life ain't cheap.

After The Fall,

all the angels were a mess,

desperate for “housing.”

Any vessel would do.

And they had no long game.

Yeah, that's...

I, on the other hand,
took some care.

I listened.

A woman was praying for
her dying husband.

So we made a trade...
His life for her vessel.

She was grateful.

I realized humans are
so desperate for life,

they'd do almost anything,
pay almost anything.

So... caching!

I was a soso angel,
but turns out,

I am an excellent businesswoman.

Wow.

That is very impressive.

As you can see, my highoctane
grace is a little bit low.

So I came for a recharge,
which unfortunately,

doesn't end well for you.

Not very cost efficient,

running around, killing angels.

What?
Wouldn't it make more sense

to keep one premium angel
on tap?

Take a sip now, sip later.

Not taking all the grace,

but giving the angel
time to recharge.

Then rinse and repeat.

And that angel being...

You'd do that?

It's better than having you

suck me dry and kill me,
isn't it?

This way, I help you,
you help me.

Still a businesswoman.

Well, if you see this man...

Yeah.

Thanks.

Excuse me, sir.

Do you mind if I ask you
a few questions?

Yeah, no, I'm kind of
working here, man.

I tell you what.
I'll be quick. I promise.

Just tell me...

have you ever seen this man?

Actually, we had a lovely chat.

He was curious about
this faith healer I'm saving up to see.

She's gonna fix this leg
right up.

Sister Jo?

And did he... believe in her?

Not at first, but after
I described her skills,

he was very supportive.

Ooh.

Better?

So much better.

Wow.

That was so much more fun
than my last time.

I had to kill that guy.

When was that?

Two nights ago.

That was you?

That was all over angel radio.

Yeah.

Star power. Can't fight it.

Did anyone know
you were coming here?

It's only you.

What the hell
are you doing here?

Do we really have
to do all this again?

Last time we were together,
I saved your lives,

and you shot me.

Doesn't that make us even?

No, I guess not.

Dean asked you a question.
What are you doing here?

My sources tell me
Lucifer's back.

He's weak and he's... or was...

In this wonderful
little slice of Americana.

I was going to try and kill him,
as were you, I assume.

Great.

Who are you working for?

Isn't it possible that
I'm simply trying

to strike a blow for the good
of humanity?

No.

That's not possible.

And truth be told,
taking out Lucifer

would be an enormous
feather in the cap.

My business model is very, um...

word of mouth.

All right, so if Lucifer
isn't here, where is he?

Excellent question.

I propose we team up.

Share Intel, cover more ground.

Huzzah!

All right.

I say we take dick bag here
back to the bunker,

find out what he knows,
and put a bullet in him,

burn his bones,
and flush his ashes.

I like that plan.

Hey. Check this out.

That's Sister Jo?
The faith healer?

No, that's not.

She's an angel.
Her name is Anael.

All right, so say Lucifer
drained her and killed her.

Where's her body?

No way. What you got?

So I set an alert up
on my phone.

Looks like Sister Jo has just
used her credit card.

Where?

You don't have to rush.

We can do this slowly.

It's always so strange.

That final moment...

when I've lost just enough
grace that I'm almost...

Human?

I feel...

emotions.

Sensations.

Things they must feel.

Yeah, I had that experience.

I didn't like it.

Hunger. Cold. Loneliness.

I don't know
how they keep going.

I do.

When I'm in that place,

I can see how there'd be pain.

But there's also hope.

Love, even.

Angels can only imagine.

Sometimes I envy humans.

They can be anything.

Do you know what my job was?

Upstairs?

I pushed a button.

A soul would come in,
I'd push a button,

they'd be counted,
and I'd wait for the next.

It was so... Boring?

Eternal.

I mean, I had ideas.

I saw how Heaven was running,
and I knew how to fix it.

But no one would listen to me.

Not Michael, not Raphael,
not Naomi.

They would just send me back
to push my button.

So up there, you're nobody.

Down here, you're somebody.

After The Fall,

when we lost our wings,

I wasn't devastated.

I was liberated.
I was finally free.

But you must know
how that feels.

No.

No, I always wanted
to... fit in,

please a father
I couldn't please.

And now I'm gonna be a father.

Probably screw it up
like he did.

Lucifer...

the great and terrible.

I don't know why I said that.

Stupid.

I mean, it's like...

pretty soon, I'm not gonna
feel anything, you know.

I mean...

the more I do this,
the stronger I get,

the more me I become.

Lucifer...

Prince of Darkness.
King of Lies.

I'm back, baby.

Then what?

And then?

I'm gonna find my son,

and the fun really starts.

This better be good news.

It is, my lord.

The prophet, we found him.

Hey, it's you.

That... II thought
I felt a presence.

I sensed you as well.

Sam and Dean are...
Are still tracking Lucifer,

but they asked me to
check in on you.

Well, I'm making
progress with the demon tablet,

but...
my goodness, it's a challenge.

Really?

Yeah. I have determined, though,
that there is definitely

some kind of spell for...
you know...

opening
a door to that other world.

Well, that would be very useful.

Yes.

The ingredients are
very, very complicated.

II'm just starting to,
decipher them.

Well, let me know if there's
anything I can do to help.

I doubt it, since apparently,
I'm the only one on the planet

who can read the damn thing.

I just hope I'm in time.

You mean, before Michael comes?

Before anything happens
to Jack or the boys' mom.

I couldn't live with myself

if they never make it out
of that terrible place.

Yes, yes,
that would be very tragic.

Forget this.

Whatever you find
on that tablet,

you will report to me.

Understand?

Yes.

Good boy.

Run along now.

Mnh.

This is it?

Yep. Last place Jo, or someone,
used her credit card.

Checked in last night.

Do you think Lucifer
is with her?

Or she's dead.
One way to find out.

Would you look at the...

Wrong. That's wrong.

Does anybody factcheck
this stuff?

I mean, that's...

This...

Hello?

My card?

Of course it's good.

Yeah, okay. You know what?

Our system must be screwy.

Do you mind bringing the card
back so I can run it again?

Okay. Just a minute.

Sure. I'll be here.
That's great. Thank you.

Well, good news. She's alive.

Anael.

Castiel.
What are you doing here?

We were gonna ask you
the same thing.

We're looking for Lucifer.
Have you seen him?

Do you know where he is?

Yes. He's in the room.

Has he hurt you?

Not yet. He's threatened.

He wants to drain my grace.

So he's still weak. Very.

You have to help me.

We will.

But first, you're gonna help us.

Dad's always stealing
my best lines, man.

Sh...

Lord Lucifer?
Could you let me in?

Sorry. I forgot my key.

“Lord Lucifer”?

I likey.

Really...

Mornin', Sunshine.

What's up?

Gents.

Hey.

Cass!

You're alive. That's...

that's awesome. They made me.

They forced me to tell them
how weak you still are.

Well, great seeing ya.
It's been a long time.

Nice jacket there, Dean.

Your hair, Sam, is magnificent.

Is that a leavein conditioner
you have there?

We got this. Go.

So what are you gonna do now?
You gonna... you gonna kill me?

Eventually.

Aah!

We need to go. Okay, just...

I just wanna enjoy this
for just a minute.

That's good. That's really good.

I've got to get in better shape.

This is ridiculous.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Did you just...

No. They vanished before
it went off.

But you're welcome.

All right, so why did ya,
you know...

Like I said,
I help you, you help me.

Right.

Cool.

Okay. So where on earth
do we go now?

Congratulations, you just
helped Lucifer escape.

Put another way,
I opted out of my own escape

and put myself in harm's way
to save your lives...

again.

All right, all right. How did
you get out of the trunk?

I'm Ketch.

I found the demon bomb
in your weapons cache

and I thought, with Lucifer's
weakened state,

it might make a dent.

"Well, it seems
his “weakened stat”"

may have been
greatly exaggerated.

Yeah, exactly. And... and Jo,
wwhat's the deal with her?

I don't know. In Heaven,
she was nothing.

She was a lowlevel functionary.

Yeah, well, now she's
Satan's gal pal. That's awesome.

Gentlemen, this may, once again,
fall on deaf ears,

but I shall have another go.

Clearly, Lucifer's more
dangerous than we thought.

I propose we pool resources

and go after him together.

Dude, why would we ever
trust you?

Fine.

As proof of my sincerity,
I shall come clean.

I'm working for Asmodeus.

Happy? Whoa. What?

How is that supposed
to make us feel better?

It's not. It's supposed to
present an opportunity.

If I'm working for him,

then I can pass information
on to you.

Right. And you would
do that for us?

For everyone.

I know you think
I'm a monster...

Because you are.

But even I must
draw the line somewhere.

And letting Lucifer free
upon the Earth?

Well, as it turns out,
that's my line.

Not to mention
the whole Michael situation.

I know you want to kill me.

I know you can't forgive me.

But if you think about it,
I'm the lesser of...

Well, at least three evils.

All I ask
is that you wait to murder me

until after I prove useful.

I know we've had
our problems in the past,

little family squabbles.

Just minor,
little disagreements.

You know, kids being kids
kinda stuff.

But right now, you need me.

Kill him. Whoa, wait, hey!

Hold on, hold on, hold on. Okay.

Number one, it's true.
I am powered down.

But you can't kill me.

We could try. Repeatedly.

Okay, look, number...
Number two,

I happen to know Heaven
is in short supply of angels.

All right, let's face it.

After Pop took a powder,
your only strength,

your only defense
was in numbers, yeah?

And now, with the Prince of Hell
basically running...

Hell, if the dark side makes
a move, y'all are screwed.

You... need... more... you.

But with Dad gone
and... everything,

I mean, who's still up for
birthin' angels?

Yo! Yo!

- You can't.
- Yeah. - He can, Dumah.

Who are you to speak to me?

Okay, she's with me,
and you're gonna listen to her.

Hey, look, I was here when
you, when all of you were born.

I saw how the old man did it.

I can make angels. Okay?

And I'll do it, if...

Enough games, Lucifer.

If for my incredible act
of generosity,

you name me
the undisputed and unquestioned

ruler of Heaven.

Yeah? It's funny.

Come on. Let's face it.
You don't wanna run the place.

Angels were designed to follow,
not lead.

Don't give me the stink eye.
That wasn't my idea.

The point is, you need me.

And icing on the cake, guys...

How'd you like your wings back?

So Ketch... can we trust him?

Not even a little.

Yeah, of course not, but...

we need him, for now.

Right.

And when we don't?

Guess.

Donatello, you're doing great.

I mean, looks like you
made a lot of progress.

It's like pulling
freaking teeth!

I...

I'm working my way
through the ingredients.

Right. Okay.

But at least we know
the spell we need is in there.

And we have a plan.

Hail to the King, baby.

I missed him by seconds.

Rest assured,
Lucifer will be found.

And killed before he causes
any more problems.

Or those idiot Winchesters
use him

to open up a gate to
Michael Land.

Another stickuphisass archangel

is the last thing I need.

Yes, well, Lucifer is
getting strong,

and as good as I am, and I am...

very good,

I don't think even I can beat
the Devil at full power.

About that.

You recall the important errand
I had mentioned?

Word had got back to me
that a certain artifact

I thought had been lost forever

resurfaced.

And now it's mine.

Beautiful, isn't it?

Yes.

The only known weapon capable
of destroying an archangel...

The archangel blade.

You'll forgive me,
but my reading of the lore

suggests that the...

blade is only effective if
wielded by an archangel.

Really?

Thanks for the news flash.

Allow me to
make an introduction.

Mr. Ketch...

Meet the Archangel Gabriel.

== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elderman