Stumptown (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 7 - November Surprise - full transcript

Dex goes undercover after she is hired by a local politician to dig up dirt on his political opponent. Meanwhile, Grey and Liz's romance continues, and Dex celebrates a tense Friendsgiving at the Bad Alibi.

This, I'm I'm good at.

I don't know why,
but I am.

Hey, thanks for your help
with Ansel.

I owe you one.
Oh, stop it.

I like him.
You know that.

You You had somebody here
while my brother was here?

Her name is Liz.

It was all very PG.

You and Dex are...
Just friends.


I just can't tell
if she's playing games or what.

I'd love
to show you my world.

Uh, you mean like
go to a jazz concert?

Super sexy.

I'm glad you came.

I built businesses
right here in Oregon,

created jobs
for hardworking Oregonians,

like my dad
and his dad before him.

Oregon never follows.

We always lead,

and I want to continue
leading us

into a future
that works for you.

I am Llewellyn Slocombe,

and I want your vote
for State Senate.

This message
was approved of and paid for

by the political action

for Oregon State Senate.

Vanessa is ready for you.


Okay, whenever you're ready.
This is a redraft.

We're against tort reform
on a state level,

but we're for it

Write it more confusing
so the voter

has no idea
what we're talking about.

I'm gonna need a salad Niçoise
in 45 minutes,

and send them a video
how to poach a fish.

You went up against
Randall Tapper.

Uh, yeah.

I mean, somebody had to.

Well, it cost him.

He pulled
his campaign donation.

I mean, I'm not gonna hold that
against you.

Or will I?

Will you?

I don't know.
Let's find out.


Uh, it's 11:00 a. m.,

so, yes,
of course I will.


Two refreshers!

Uh, give me the room.

What do you know
about Dan Gibson?

Councilman Dan?, married...

seems smart.

I don't know.

I want to destroy
Dan Gibson.

I want to reduce him to ash,

and then I want to have
a private ceremony,

and by "private,"
I mean "public ceremony,"

where the proud people of Oregon
watch me scatter his remains

over the mountains,
out to the high desert

to be forgotten forever.

Cool beans.


Thank you, Elliot.

Um, why am I here?

I have one month
to get voters

to punch the ballot for my guy,
Llewellyn Slocombe.

You're gonna find
my October Surprise.

So, let me get this

You want me
to destroy Councilman Dan?

He's selling squeaky clean.

Nobody in politics
is that good.

He has a secret.
You're gonna sniff it out,

and you're gonna bring it
to me,

and I'm gonna detonate
his soul.

Yeah, I don't know.

It's not really my bag.

Are you sure you got
the right girl?

It's 50 grand.
5 up front,

45 on receipt of dirt
dirty enough to bury Dan Gibson.

Yeah. Yeah, okay.
I'll just move some things

around in my schedule,
but, yeah.

Vanessa. Vanessa.
Uh, security found a package

that may contain
some anthrax.

Betcha a finski.

Yeah. Okay, so, I just need
that check for the 5 grand.


Oh, you don't think ‐‐ you don't
think we're good for ‐‐

She doesn't think
we're good for it.

Okay. As a sign
of good faith,

I am gonna give you
my gas mask.

Gee, thanks.
Elliot, give me yours.

I'm gonna need that check,

I don't want to die
for $12 an hour.

You were amazing
last night.

Oh, was I?

Oh, my God.
My heart stopped.


Well, you should know ‐‐
it was my first time.

Could've fooled me.


I actually recorded it.

Well, do I want
to watch it?

Oh, you want to see it.

It, um ‐‐ I think we should
probably watch it together.

Oh, no.

Grey, keep that
freaking elbow up.


I mean, elbow up.

That's good advice.

My brother Edgar ‐‐

two‐time Northwest Backyard
Axe Toss champ.


Where did I find you?

Um, I found you.
At your bar.

Literally begged you
to take me home.


Glad you did.


Let's get started.

Um...I have
an awkward question.

Okay. Well, I have
an awkward answer.

Can I have a job?

So, you're gonna ruin
Councilman Dan's career?

That's the gig?
Wow, your new lady

really put you through
your paces, huh?

No, this is about
the cool‐down.

I forgot to do
the cool‐down.

The cool‐down is just
as important as a warm‐up.

I think we're off‐topic.

Here's the thing, though ‐‐
Councilman Dan seems like

a really good person.

I thought you were doing
all this to help the good guys.

Well, there are no good guys
in politics,

which is sexist,
by the way.

Everyone likes him.

You, be yourself. Don't just
follow the in‐crowd, okay?

You're gonna make everyone
hate him.

No, I'm not. I'm sure he is
a monster deep down,

like everyone else.

If someone's gonna vote
for Councilman Dan,

they deserve to know
the truth.

It's the obliques.
That's what's really hurting.

Yeah, I hurt my obliques.

She did this thing with her leg,
where ‐‐

Oh, yeah, an anchor baby.

It's when you wrap around

and there's a lot of compression
on the low back ‐‐

But we don't need to...
we don't need to get into it.

And since when
do you care about the truth?

Well, since the truth
started to pay.

"Dan Can Do It."

Oh, you're going

I sure am.

Gotta start somewhere.

Hello. Uh, Dex...Gladstone
reporting for duty.

I run the phone bank.

Oh, I got you pegged,

"Team leader ‐‐ Carol."

Oh. Geez.

Of course, of course.

Tempeh ball?
Oh, no.

Not in this universe
or any other.

Suit yourself.
They are quite yummy.

Now ‐‐ Oh!
Thank you.

So, um, where do you, uh,
want me?

My background is mostly
in administration,

so if Dan needs help
at his desk ‐‐

Oh, no,
he has four assistants.

He's completely covered.


Hardware issues.


So, uh, so, fundraising,

That is a good guess.

Here's your script.

Now, there's no quota
per se,

but a good goal is 30 contacts
per shift.

Convert eight of those,
and that's a win.

And, uh, and the man himself?

He'll be in.
You'll know.

Why are you here?

Oh. Uh...

I'm sorry, what?

We all know Dan is on
a rocket to Washington.

He has his eye
on the big chair.

Look at these killers.

No, come on.

This is the future
of our country,

and these people know
that they are riding

a gravy train
all the way to D. C.

Now, let me ask you again ‐‐
why are you here?

You know,
I just want to know

if Dan is really too good
to be true.

So, if I'm gonna hitch
this wagon to the gravy train,

I need to know
who I'm following.

Let's get you started.


Oh, geez.
Don't go esoteric.

Hey, I'm the customer.
You know what?

I'll have
what he's having.


I'll have a Manhattan.

Okay. Coming up.

No martini glasses?

Do you have
Carpano Antica?

Look, I got what I got.

I'll grade you on a curve,


So, what's the barback

He's at soccer practice.

I'm on my own.

Oh. Pushover.

Can I have a week off
for Christmas?

Okay, 1
you're not hired yet,

2 absolutely not,

and, 3
it's complicated.

He's a great kid, and I give him
Thursdays off for soccer

and Saturdays
if he's got a game.



You gotta finish it.

Nice final touch.

Damn, that's
a pretty good drink.

20 bucks an hour,
and I don't pool tips.

She's a deal
at twice the price.

And I'm good‐looking, too.

Don't hop in, Danny.

Just stop.

What do you say
about tomorrow night, we go out?

My buddy's band
is playing.

They're not good.

They're actually bad,
but they're loud.

What do you say?

We are going out?

Huh. Bold move.

I like it.

Hello, uh...

Jill Woods, my na‐‐

Uh, Claire Kennedy ‐‐

Whoa. You ‐‐ You ‐‐

You kiss your mother
with that mouth?

Okay, well, don't answer
the phone

while you're in the bath
if it's an unknown number.

That would...

you have a great d‐‐

They tell you one in five calls
pays out,

but it's really like one in 15
in my experience.

Archie, the last campaign
I worked on ‐‐

uh, we had a lot of confidential
materials coming in.

Do we have a policy
for that here?

Yeah, we shred every night.

Dan's a stickler.

Never saves a piece
of paper.

Okay, so, if I wanted
something shredded,

I would just ‐‐
I'd go in there?

What? No.

Give it to Carol.

"Walk in there."

The Councilman's busy.
Rewriting the future.

Of course.

You know,
I've never even met him.
Oh, no?

Oh. Shh!

I don't ‐‐ I just ‐‐
I don't understand.

Don't panic. Don't.
How can they just ‐‐
They can just cancel?

It's alright.

We ‐‐ We've got the church
as an option.

We just ‐‐
We need something.

I never gossip.

Oh, but please do.

But the venue for tonight's
fundraiser fell out.

Talk about
a turd sandwich.

We were all gonna go.

The whole office?

Yeah, as a thank‐you.

But I guess
we're stuck here,

burning the midnight oil ‐‐

You know, I know a venue that we
can get into super last‐minute.

You would be our hero.

Papa needs a new pair
of mai tais.

He sure does.
Let's get it for him.

I just want to thank you, uh,
for your contributions.

You really saved our bacon
tonight ‐‐ both of you.

could not agree more.

Thank you so much.

Well, happy to help.
I really like the slogan.

Uh, "Be You, Be True,
Be Portland."

"Be You, Be True,
Be Portland."

So, we can count
on your vote?

I'd vote 10 times
if I could.

And he might try.

Convicted felon.

‐He's a business owner now.

That's why he's so
into, um, criminal justice.

Hey, well, then you know
how important

sentencing reform
is to me.

We are gonna overturn
Measure 11

and get back
to common‐sense prison terms.

Go out there and save it
for the stump speech.

I'm sorry. Listen to me.
I can't shut it off.

But it's true. We will.

It's all silly.
Alright, you two have fun.

We'll see you out there.


What was that?

What? I was just ‐‐
I was making small talk.

Get better
at small talk.

What were you doing
in there?

You were kissing
some serious political ass.

I don't know. Maybe I could do
business with him.

He seems honest.

Well, maybe.

I'll find out.

I cannot believe you dragged me
into all this.

I had to empty out their office
somehow, okay?

And you're welcome for all of
the paying customers, you know?

Yeah, that's true.


You got her tending bar now,

just trying her out.

That didn't sound good.

It's a trial period,
and so far, so good.



W‐‐ It ‐‐ Nothing.

She just, you know...

she seems a little young.



Uh, question...

Dan for Senate.

Oh, look how good that looks.

Thank you so much
for coming.

We appreciate
your, uh, support.


Tonight, I'm just here
to support a good man.

Thanks for the invite.

When did everybody
get into politics?

Middle school, and you're
the one wearing the T‐shirt.

Yeah, this is a long story.

Hey, look, um...

if it's cool with you,
at some point,

I'd like to meet
your brother.


You know what?
Actually, we ‐‐

we host
a little Thanksgiving thing.

Um...and you're welcome
to come to that,

if you don't have
any plans.

Ah, anything I can do
to avoid my family,

I'm down.
Please put
your hands together

for your next state senator,
Dan Gibson.

Thank you.
Thank you, Bad Alibi!

Thank you all so much
for being here.

It means so much to me.

Um..."Be You, Be True."

My slogan, right?

I want to tell you
what it means to be me

and why I'm here working so hard
to represent all of you.

Uh, also, for any of you
who might have wandered

into the wrong event tonight,
by the way, I'm Dan Gibson.

Okay? Yeah.

And this is my campaign manager,
my husband, Antony.

Uh, this handsome fella.

And so, if I wander,
if I'm wandering

from my prepared remarks...
Alright, I'm gonna go.

You're gonna miss
the prepared remarks.

...just talk to him...
I'll be right back.
You won't miss me.

...'cause he's always
keeping a list.

You guys look great tonight.

it means so much to me...

Come on.

Hey, Carol.

You know, I think I, uh,
lost my clipboard ‐‐

Uh‐huh. Uh‐huh.

What's with the letter?
What letter?

The one
that's behind your back.

Oh, this letter?
This is a personal letter.

My grandmother, uh ‐‐
You know what?

I got a bad vibe from you
from jump.

Now, give me that letter
before I have to bust your ass.

Oh, alright.

Yeah, I know who you are,

You're not the only private dick
Slocombe hired.

You're undercover.

I'm working sly, and you have
popped a squat on my turf.

This is insane.

You're after
the October Surprise?

I'm after $75K.

Same as you.

No, they told me 50.

Yeah, well, grow up.
You're working for scum,

and now you're digging in
on scum.

Okay, listen, we're cool.

Doesn't have to be like this,

You know what?
If I see you here tomorrow,

we're gonna have

The letter.



Hey, pal.

Just wanted to make sure
you're good

with your sister going out
of town for the day.

Where's she going?
The University
of Northern Oregon.

But she'll be back
for Friendsgiving.

She promises.

It won't be long.

Let's run through this.

How do you lock
this place up?

Windows, porch light,
side door, and back door.

And what do you do

if you see something
you don't like?

I touch my nose
with my tongue.

Little smart ass.

You're messing with me.

I text the word "apple."

Right, and then I'll be
wherever you are.

You guys treat me
like a little kid.

We do?
You do.

Well, I'm sorry.

I don't see you
as a little kid.

I see you as a man,
and I see you as a friend.

We cool?

I'm cool.

Also, you're out of milk,

so figure that out,
tough guy.

Uh, Professor Gopalin?

I went by
for office hours.

I'm hiding
from my juniors.

Just handed back
their midterms.

Are you a student here?

Oh, no.

Wow. I am flattered.
Thank you.

No, I'm here about, uh,
Dan Gibson.

Councilman Dan?

I can't imagine why.

Well, he was on the faculty

He worked in the econ department
with you,

and you were
in contact with him recently.

I'm with his campaign.
I ‐‐ We were not in ‐‐

You sent him a letter
last week.

I haven't seen Dan
in a decade,

since he was
an associate professor.

I was just wishing him luck.

But he held on to your letter,
and I understand why.

It was very...intimate.

You read it?

Yes. Yes, you said
that you were proud of him

for living his truth,

and I guess I'm just wondering
what lie

he was living with
way back when.

Sometimes a letter's
just a letter.

I apologize if you wasted
your time coming out here.

It's been too long.

Oh, just long enough.

What do I owe
the pleasure?

Uh, I am here to report
a break‐in.


And what walked off
on you?

You ‐‐ You don't want
to get a pen?

Oh, let's hear
the story first.

The break‐in ‐‐
was it, uh, was it your house?

Dan Gibson's
campaign office,

burglarized by your friend
Dex Parios.

So, you would like
to report her?

Oh, no, I'm ‐‐ I'm ‐‐
I'm not at liberty to do that.

Technically, I shouldn't have
been there

to witness the break‐in.

Okay, so,
what would you like me to do?

Bring her in.
Get her off the street.

Scare her straight.

Get her off the streets?

And I assume that you already
tried to do this yourself?

Um...that conversation
ended prematurely.

She beat feet.

But if you tell me
where she's at,

I'd be happy to talk
to her.

Carol, why are you still
doing this?

You got to be
in your late...
Watch it.


You still have a cabin
up in Mount Hood, right?


Why not get
out of the game?

No way this is still fun.

And is that why you do it,

For the laughs?

Look, your girl Dex is in
over her head.

These are heavy people.

I'll pass that on.

But, listen ‐‐ Carol...

think about that cabin,


I'm sorry.
I couldn't speak freely.

Listen, I am here
to help your friend Dan.

Will you help me do that?

Why would I do that?

Or I could turn your life
upside down

and...see what falls out?

Not necessary.

When Dan taught here,
he was a different person.

How so? Your colleagues
said they loved him,

said the students did, too.

Some of them,
maybe too much.

One student in particular ‐‐
very attractive.

I always wondered.

If he violated
school policy.

Don't be naive.

What are you doing here?

I'm just trying to get
ahead of things for Dan,

but what was
his, um, name ‐‐

the ‐‐ the ‐‐ the student
that he got tangled up in?

Her name.

Dan wasn't out.

He was trying so hard
to pass.

Not that it mattered to us,
but it did to him,

and this girl
was all over him.

She was beautiful.

Do you remember her name?


This is 15 years ago.

Anything you remember
could help.

She played volleyball.

She dropped out.

Next semester,
Dan was gone.

I'm proud
he embraced his story.

It's not always easy
being true.

No, no, it's not.

Uh, thank you.

You did a great thing
for the people of Oregon.

You know the Internet stocks
video pornography for free?

I'm helping Dex on the case.

Uh, 'cause she asked me,
and I owe her.

For what?
A bunch of stuff.

Hey, look,
which one of these girls

do you think is the, um...

you know,
the best, um...

The, uh...

The hottest?
It's a reductive term,
but yes.

Which one is the hottest,
in your opinion?

‐ Number 9.
‐That's what I was thinking.

It's Number 9 for sure.

I got to tell Dex that.

Yeah, I think you cracked
this thing wide open.

Good job.

Can I be honest?

I kinda love this.

Rooting around in people's past,
pulling the thread.

It's fun.
Did you Google‐stalk me?

After we met?


So, you found it?

Found what?

How I wound up
in Portland.

How my ex had a psychotic break
on vacation in France,

said I used him
as a drug mule.

Heroin, he said.

Police detained me.

The State Department
had to get me out in the end.

I was trapped
for two months.

Lost my job.
I lost everything.

Had to leave Seattle
and just start over.

I don't know if you're messing
with me or not.

you're the super‐sleuth.

Hey, Dex.

Yeah, I think I got her.
Blond hair, long legs.

Wow. You're really painting
a word picture, buddy.

She plays volleyball
her freshman and sophomore year,

and then
she just drops out.

I'll take a run at her.

What's her name?
Her name? Yeah.

Emma Lindstrom.

Great. Thanks.







That was easy.

Looks like I'm driving
to Yamhill.


You must be Jacob.

Yeah, that's me.

I'm, uh,

Uh, I'm a friend of your mom's
from way back when.


Well, it's a party.

I'm Casey,
Emma's brother.

I‐Is everything okay,

Everything's fine,

Why don't you go get started
on your homework?


You kids keep it down
in here.

Nice to meet you,
Miss Guardstone.

Shall we go outside?


Sweet kid.

Smart ass.

Like I said.

What is your business
with my sister?


I have questions...

about Jacob.

So do I.
Who sent you?

Well, what does it matter?
I got sent.

Um...I know about you
and Dan Gibson.

I know a lot, actually.

I know that he gave you a B‐plus
in Applied Econometrics,

that you had a fling

and then you dropped
out of school

and had his baby,

But you, uh, you never told him.
Why is that?

Don't ‐‐ Don't come in our house
with this garbage.

Look, there was no father
on the birth certificate.

That's a red flag to me.

And I am not the one you need
to worry about, okay?

There are bad people
that are gonna find Jacob.

It's campaign season.

This is
very valuable information.

You don't have
to say anything.

Casey, I got it.

I was obsessed with Dan.

I had a feeling
he was hiding things.

I guess I thought
he was so smart.

And he made me
feel smart...

but I had a boyfriend
back home.

I got pregnant,
and...I lied.

Told him Jacob was his.

He split
right after Jacob was born.

He didn't deserve
to be a father.

It's only ever been us ‐‐
me, my brother, and my boy.

You have to protect
your family.

I can respect that.

What do you suggest we do?

I think you tell him.

Now, in your own words.

I can't.

They're gonna ruin
my son's life.

You don't have to do this.

You can keep this
a secret.

That's what I'm ‐‐
I'm trying to tell you.

I can't.

And ‐‐ And ‐‐
And you can't, either.

So, you're gonna ‐‐
you're gonna sell this?

You're gonna profit off
our family?

I am going to fulfill
my job.


Good to know.

Now get the hell
out of our house.



I am so screwed.

Yeah? Who isn't?

No, I mean it.

It's bad.

It's bad.
I messed up.

Worse ‐‐
Worse than normal.

What'd you do?

Um...I found what my client
was looking for.

Oh, quit bragging.

No, I mean it.
This is really bad, Grey, okay?

I‐I‐I found her,
the ‐‐ the girl,

and I don't know what to do
with what I found.

Well, for $45,000, you turn her
in to the client, alright?

I know. I know.
I know.

But if I do that,
then I blow up her life, know, that's not
why I do this.

Why did you start doing this?

To help people, I think.
Which is great.

Dex, I can't give you
an opinion

unless you let me know
what's going on.

What's up?

Well ‐‐



What do you say?
We still on for tonight?

I just came back early
to prep my station.

That is really great.

What were you saying?
What's the thing?

I'm not gonna...she's...

No. It's okay.
She knows about the girl.


You told her? Why?

'Cause she helped me
identify her.

Oh, Number 9,
with the legs.

I'm a private investigator.


You ‐‐ You can't just spill
my work to the new bartender.

My name is Liz.

This is unbelievable.

I don't even know
why I came here.

Okay, enough.
Just let me help you.

No, you know what?
I'm good.

Don't just say "I'm good."

I'll just figure this out
on my own, okay?

Dex, come on.

A rose?

Come on, man, relax.
It's for a lady.

When was the last time
you got somebody a flower, huh?

It's nice.
You should try it.

You want a flower?



We need to talk.
Hard pass.

You don't even want
to know the topic?

Blow my mind.

It involves you
getting paid.

So, here's the deal.

I got the thing.

The October Surprise.

So, what I'm thinking is,
you take it to Vanessa,

split your fee with me.

75 grand,
right down the middle.

I see.
So, the thing you found is bad,

someone begged you
not to use it,

but you're gonna.

Now you're trying to spread
your bad juju around.

You take 40, I'll take 35.

You're on your own, girlie.
I'm out.

Okay, how about I take 25,
you get to keep 50 grand?

You don't get it.
I quit.

Heard Vanessa bragging

how she was gonna destroy
Councilman Dan.

I got too many bodies
on my belt.

You know what kinda cases
I like?

Reuniting kids
with their biological parents.

That's my bag
from here on out.

Okay, so what do I do?

The question
you need to answer is,

how much pain are you willing
to inflict for a dollar?

And I'd think fast,

'cause they got more people
out there

who'll do just about anything
to scoop you.


You're in over your head.

You should just lean
on Detective Hoffman.

He's watching out for you.

You know what?
I can watch my six just fine.

Whatever you do,
remember this ‐‐

you got to live
with yourself.




Are you okay?

I am now.
Did you get my text?

Yeah, I did.

What are you doing
in my house?

Oh, I'm fine, thank you.

How are you?

I wanted to deliver this
in person.


45 grand?
What is this for?

It's your bonus for getting us
what we needed.

I haven't shown anyone
my file.

So, Casey Lindstrom,
Emma's brother,

he came to me
because you proved to him

that their little family secret
was worth something.

So, naturally,
I bought it off him,

and now I am paying you

because he wouldn't have
come forward otherwise.

So, thank you.

Wow. So, he sold out
his own family?

Okay, so what happens now?

Now, I use what you found

to go suck Councilman Dan
into a black hole

from which
he'll never emerge.

Oh, we go live
at the county fair in ‐‐

oh, in about an hour. did good, Parios.


Look, don't do this, okay?

Jacob is
a really good kid,

and if you do this to him,
his life is gonna be ruined.

That's sad.

Well...'s out of the barn.

What's the matter?

Um...well, I just destroyed
two families, buddy.

Listen, I have to go.

I'm gonna fix it.

Are you okay?

I'm okay, Dex.

Lock the door after me,

You're really slicing
those limes, huh?

Yeah, they should float.

That's right.

Hey, um...

I'm...I'm sorry,

but...I think we should keep
this professional.

Employee, boss.


Well, we wouldn't be keeping it
professional, right?

We would be changing it
to professional.


No, physically.

Liz, w‐what happened?

It was kind of last‐minute.

You canceled,
and you did it via text.

I know. I'm sorry.

you've already said that.

This is where I would normally
ask you,

"Did I do something wrong?"

But I know I didn't,
so ‐‐

You didn't.
I know.

Look, pretend I'm dumb
and catch me up.

What's going on?

It's just...watching
you two together ‐‐

I don't want
to get in between anything.

You talking
about me and Dex?

We are just friends.

You can trust me.

I want to trust you,
but I just met you.

I've seen this movie

My last boyfriend ‐‐

You are comparing me
to the guy who cracked up?

Yes, but he had this ex
who was always hanging around,

and in the end,
he wound up with her again.

I...I just need
to protect myself.

Well, I can say this ‐‐ you have
not seen this movie before.

'Cause this movie
went straight to DVD.

In South Korea.

It was terrible.

I'm backing
out of the metaphor.

Hey, can I put
this knife down?


Look, I really like you.

I think you're great,

And I'm right here, and I'd like
to give this a shot.

And, look, me and Dex ‐‐
we're just friends.

Give me a minute to prove that
to you, okay?


I'm holding you to it.


Llewellyn Slocombe
remember that.

Llewellyn ‐‐ Hey.
How you doing?

Hi, sweetie.


Sir, don't get up.

But get my vote, alright?

Nice to see you.

A vote for Slocombe
is a vote for income!


How you doing?

Vote, okay?

Wow. You're voting, right?


Llewellyn Slocombe,


Thank you.
Every vote counts!

Uh, Councilman...Dan? don't know me
from Eve, but ‐‐


Dex Gladstone, right?

Uh, rescued my fundraiser.
I owe you.

Um...uh, we don't have
a lot of time,

but, uh, I'm not
who I said I was,

and I have
some sensitive i‐information

that I need to share
with you.

Uh...Team Dan,
c‐could we have the room?

‐Oh, alright.

What's up?,
you have a son.

Uh, his mother
is Emma Lindstrom.

His name's Jacob.

He's, uh, 15 years old.

He's very funny.

Uh, he's in AP Lit.

I‐I tracked him down
for your opponent.



You were investigating me?

I was. I was.

And Slocombe's team
is planning on going live

with this right now.

Then what the hell
are you doing here?

I took a job
I shouldn't have taken, okay?

I thought
that both sides were dirty,

so what did it matter
what side I was on?

But I was wrong.

It does matter, and ‐‐
and I'm ‐‐ I'm here.

I'm trying ‐‐
I'm trying to fix this.

Okay, does...
Oh, my God.

Does the boy know
about me?

No, Emma never told him.

Uh...S‐Slocombe speaks first.

We've got, like, 15 minutes
to strategize here.

Wait, you have a son?

Your whole coalition is based
on the fact

that you were
an out gay man,

that you were honest
about who you are.

They're behind me because I have
a vision for the future, Ant.

I ‐‐
Dan, our slogan is
"Be You, Be True."

This changes the story
we've been telling,

and the story
is everything.

Okay, sorry, this kid,
your son ‐‐

he ‐‐ he didn't ask to be
in the middle of this story.

What do I do now?


I guess you own it,

No spin.
We expand your truth.

Okay, well,
that might work for you,

but it's still gonna mess up
Jacob's life.

You're taking counsel
from a turncoat PI?

I ‐‐
You don't know that.

Oh, my God.
Okay, look.

This ‐‐ This side,
they're gonna burn you, okay?

They don't care what happens
to you

or to Jacob
or his mother.

What have I done?

You didn't do anything.

Emma made her choice,

and now you have
to make yours.

What are we supposed
to do?

This is gonna
ruin everything.

All the work we've done ‐‐
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

I have a plan.

But you're not gonna
like it.

Alright, people are coming off
of funnel cakes,

so let's talk fast.

Someone want to tell me

what the holy hell
is going on here?

We all know you're about to
detonate Dan's family secret.

Okay, they would have done
the same to us.

Actually, honey,
we ran a clean campaign.

We stand for something.

Ooh. Keep talking.

I'm getting aroused.

That's disgusting.

‐You knock‐off Kellyanne Conway.

Okay. Jacob Lindstrom
is a 15‐year‐old kid

who has no idea
what's happening here,

so what is it gonna take
for you to keep him out of this?

Well, that's a big ask.

Uh, there's only one thing

I understand,
and I am prepared.

But we don't trust you.

We want assurances.

In writing.

‐Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.


I want to hear you say it first,

I just ‐‐
I just want to hear it.

I will drop
out of the race.

‐Mm, mm.

And you're gonna sign
a contract

that says
that you and your team

are not gonna utter
Jacob's name.

Not today, not ever.

Great. Sure.
Just draft it up.

I already did.


I hope you're proud
of yourselves.


Let's take
a little peek here.


Thank you.

I never pegged you
to be a family man.

‐Whoa, Dan!

I should have done that
on the debate stage,

you son of a bitch!
I'm gonna ‐‐

You're gonna hear
from my lawyer!

And you know ‐‐ Hey!
That was a good punch, though.

‐That was good.
‐Oh, wow.

Let's go. Let's go.
Let go of me!
I know karate!

Can we get a car? Good job.
I'll come and get you!
Let ‐‐ Let ‐‐ Let go of me!


Well, Dan was
the better man.

Oh, I've been at this
since I was about knee‐high...

at my daddy's mistress.

We don't always deserve
the better man,

but you ‐‐ you.

Wow. I am definitely keeping you
in mind for future work.

Oh, no.
No. No, thank you.

That would be ‐‐
That'd be horrible.

Um, you can
take this back.

It's money.

It's blood money.

Is there
any other kind?

Yeah, there is.

I will see you
around the bouncy house.


Well, this is all that's left
of Grandma's china.

She threw a lot of it.


Do you remember when she broke,
um, Uncle Mark's nose?


Hey, we're here!


Ah. You brought the bartender
to Friendsgiving.

I did.
We're together.

And her name is Liz,
and you know that.

For example, Liz,
would you explain the thing?

Um, I have been aging
a barrel of Sazerac.

Well, by all means, come on in.



Oh, Detective.


Looks like you got
the invite.

Looks that way.

So, I got the bottle
you drink first

and the bottle
you drink second.

Thank you.

Hey, Ansel, this is Miles.

Miles, Ansel.

So, you can just invite
anybody you want?

Well, it is my house.

it's your parents' house.

Do you want to eat
or not?

I do.

You didn't let her
cook anything, did you?

No way.


My doctor's traveling
this week.

I can't get sick.

Rough day?

Uh, it's just,
you know ‐‐

No, go on and tell her.

You're a hero.


I stopped the world
from ruining one kid's life,

but to do that,
I had to bury a man

who was gonna make the world
a better place.

You did the right thing.

You know
what I'm grateful for?

Oh, yeah.
Let's do that.

Hey, that's for you.

For things
we couldn't predict.

If I hadn't walked in

to a decidedly not‐haunted bar
on a job,

I would have never met
this guy.

That's true.


‐To you.

Where's the restroom?

Down the hall.



She is perfect, right?

I don't know.

Um...she seems
really, like, happy.


Is she okay?