Stromberg (2004–2012): Season 4, Episode 10 - Die Abrechnung - full transcript

Has it been cleaned
since you last wore it?

It stinks,
like the whole club died in it.

So nice of Horst. Gives Mr. Stromberg
his uniform for Schützenfest.

It is not at all clear whether
be there next weekend.

Günter Nehring is counting on you.
And I

shall give you this.

This year's choir program.

Shall you get on it,
because yesterday...

were not at the rehearsal.

[Magdalena] You see, Horst.
You've had it on for years.

Now Mr. Stromberg
carry on.



[Achim] Looks great.
I'll take a picture.

[Magdalena] No problem.

I make tighter the jacket, the pants.

[Achim] Bit friendly.

[Camera shutter clicks]

Pisses me off, honestly.

Piefiger customs crap,
where everyone is like everyone else.

Must get out of there as soon as possible.

I have to attack again,

before I get scrapped in Finsdorf
in Finsdorf.

The chances are good.

Becker folded the Seifertsche
like a paper airplane.

Madame still has a trial period.
I'm confident that...

We should be
on the highway.



Or?

Did I make a wrong turn?
But here also looks

one shitty town looks like the other.

A shit is what it is.

Yes! [honks horn]

Granny! Get out of the way!

[Man] So.

Caution.

No way.

Here are some more applications from the Erika.

Nobody really cleans up.

Look on the bright side,

nothing is lost.

It has been dead for two years.
Can really be disposed of.

[Stromberg] Well.

I would keep something like that as a memorial.

Tanja, this shows how fast
we can be away from the window.

From the window of life and the office.

Will you let me know if it works?

Ulf, forgot to salute.

Tanja has got a tone on her body,
since she is the boss.

Are you certainly glad
when that changes again.

Why should it change?
So, should go again.

One hears, Tanja sits so firmly in the saddle
like our grandma at the rodeo.

Friday the head office is looking at
Tanja's new accounting system.

If they like it,
she gets the job.

Solid. Without a probationary period.

- Said the Becker.
- Aha...

[Ulf] So.

Now!

[Tanja] This is not your department.
You have no business here anymore.

I think it would be better if you didn't
you didn't walk around here all the time.

Ulf, will you come over here?

[Bert] Leipziger Einer..., uh, Allerlei.

That's just vegetables.

Mia eats nothing that had to die extra
and had eyes and parents.

A tin can
is not a gift.

I know.
There's something else that comes with it.

A poem and a flower and everything.

But in the restaurant or something,

when somebody orders a steak,

she can't take it so well,
the Mia.

That's why I give her this.

Let's see, which one of us
we warm this up.

Mom used to make all kinds of things too.

There have found
the right two found each other.

Mmh.

She has a screw loose
and he lost a nut.

[Jennifer] Oh Bernd!

Ernie, did you count the twelves?
I can't find them in the computer.

No, I haven't.

I said on Monday
that I need them.

Without twelve
I cannot present.

On Friday they will come from the head office

and you've been dilly-dallying here for days.
Get a grip!

- Give it!
- This is silly.

[Jennifer.]
Give him back the stupid can.

Ernie is unstable in the millet.
There you roll

not over it like a steam pile driver!

Apart from the motivation
of such a deserving employee!

I said before,
do not interfere!

[Bert] That's my can!

What's wrong with you?

[Jennifer]
Tanya is hysterical at the moment.

Like some supermodel.
No idea what she has.

That's not mare biting either.

Tanja is also not a mare anymore,
but like a wild stallion.

I can think of other animal names.
I find it anyway

totally silly, what she pulls off.

[Stromberg]
I told you that directly,

that you don't do yourselves
you are not doing yourself any favors.

Just a woman like you--

We are just in the--

Just had a talk
with a couple of people.

They have a neck like a thigh
because of Tanja.

That will only change
when a real man sits there again.

You won't get them back
when the twelves are finished.

In a vote for popularity.
I would vote for Tanja

easily.

Lurchi for President.

Yes, I can!

Yeah!

[Jennifer's cell phone rings.]

Oh, Tanja. I think
I have to go over there again.

- Sorry.
- Bye.

It's gone.

[Bert rhymes]
Often you feel sadness inside,

but because I am so much like you
I can understand you not only well,

i am always happy too,
rejoice...

i am always glad to see you too.

For me you are the great lot
and not a stupid mourner.

This is not for you.

What do you think about it,
as a woman?

I don't know...

With Leipziger Allerlei in it.

I'm sure she'll be happy.

Yes, she is happy, isn't she?

So kids, here, uh....

Very briefly just now?

[Stromberg] Yes?

Hello! Today is... Watch out here!

Today, as you know, is a very special day.
special day. Today is the anniversary,

as every year, an event,

which, I think,
all very upset.

I think for none of us
life is still like that,

as it was when she was still there.
Namely, the Erika.

[Colleagues offer condolences.]
Yes, oh...

Erika, who unfortunately much too soon
is no more.

Was... and as you all know,

my co-workers have given me

have always been very close to my heart.

Therefore I would like
for the Erika today a

Memorial afternoon

event... uh...

so, make.

[Stromberg] One afternoon,

on which the work rests just as much,

as well as the Erika

rests. [Alarm beeps]

Uh, Ernie.

And what better way to commemorate
better to commemorate Erika than

with champagne and cake!

I brought both with me.

But for the presentation we are supposed to
the damage reports for the presentation.

[Stromberg.]
Yes, please.

If that is more important
than the memory of a dead person,

I will not stop you.

But I mean,

here also once again someone must
think about the people!

The people are more important
than...

- Spread the cake.
- 00:07:240 --> 00:07:760 Yes.

As damage reports

And any presentations.

[Bert] Sprinkles.

Ne? Erika?

[Jennifer] I think it's sweet
that you think about Erika.

Yes, I think so too.
That that's appropriate,

something like that, right?

Also a little bit?

[Employee.]
I actually have to...

It's all on me!
It's because of Erika!

Krümelmonster Burstedt would not have gone home either
gone home after one piece.

[Bert] She's dead, Erika.
You don't make jokes about that.

Besides, she wasn't that fat.
That was a gland problem.

But then it had
really thick glands, right?

[Lehnhoff]
Should also be...

[Stromberg]
Must all be the same...

There's your cookie.
Where's your cookie?

What's here?

[Stromberg] The Ulf!
We are commemorating. Fire it up.

- Sorry?
- What?

I should give Tanja
the two numbers right away.

She still hangs at the Becker for a while
because of her great system.

[Laughter]

Here. This was back when...

where Stromberg grabbed
grabbed the cleaning lady's butt.

[Stromberg.]
Nonsense! I didn't!

[Ulf]
Here, Ernie, your dingus is here.

[Bert] Ow, jeez!

Mia, we're celebrating a little bit here.

It's good that you are here.
I'm glad.

Now for all very briefly.
This is Mia!

Is it someone's birthday?

This is for a dead colleague.

Erika.

Cheers!

[Bert]
I don't enjoy joy either.

But it looked quite different.

That was also just because,
since I know you.

That's why I also wanted to...
I got a present.

But Tanja has the can.

Which can?

[Employee]
What Ulf looked like back then!

[Really cool, isn't it?
Because I always see

really cool. Here look, like this.

[Tanja] What's going on here?

We are doing here because of the Erika....

[Stromberg] Here
must also once again

to take care of the human.

Today around our highly esteemed colleague
Erika Burstedt,

who exactly two years ago today
has blessed the temporal.

Are you crazy? The death anniversary of Erika
is only in four or five weeks.

Tanja, quickly, the can.

- Such nitpicking, exactly, that--
- They are quiet.

Go back to Finsdorf
and stay there.

Come on, I mean it!

Have a drink,
and keep the ball flat.

So that's the thanks,
if you care--

All of you, back to work, right?

[Mia]
She screams like that, like my mother.

Your acquaintances
have no place here!

This is not a support group!

I want my can.

Loose is different, Mrs. Steinke.

Ulf, you really don't understand anything!

[Stromberg] So now...

Here 'a dead woman
on the carpet!

My dear Miss,
if this becomes public,

it's but tight on 'm boss chair.

[Nobody will make you a cake,
when you are dead!

Mia, we are going out.

[Ulf] If I had for every mistake.
in life I would have gotten 1,000 euros,

I would have been a millionaire long ago.

About new rims and so on,

I think about for weeks.

Read test reports, talk to people
and everything. But marriage...

nope.

She: "Don't we want to get married?
It's great from the tax."

I stupid asshole say yes immediately.

Don't you get it,
what Stromberg is up to?

I don't give a damn.
I'm not married to him.

I don't want you to make me feel like
in front of everybody.

[Tanja] Where everything is at stake for me

you stand there and make faxes.
Do you think I'm up for that?

Do you know,
how people see you here?

I don't care. For people the boss is
always stupid.

Dwarf boar.

Terror-Tanja. Nerd Stone.

That my name in connection
with nerdiness--

The others are much more important to you
than anything else, typical!

They are not to me!

What matters to me is that you are popular.
You are zero popular.

[Bert] So grief dumpling...

not that you are fat
or something.

Do you think I am fat?

No, just not. That's why no...

I had first
"To me, you're a grief vamp,

I love you, Berthold Heisterkämp."

Didn't do it then.

Flowers I find somehow...

difficult.

In principle, they are already dead.

Cut off and so.

Oh, I didn't know that.

I was just thinking,

since I know you,
everything is better with me.

That's when I wanted you to be happy.

Do you know what depression
in Turkish?

Cloudy turnip.

I thought,
you see everything the same way,

that life...

that everything sucks
and that you...

apparently not.

Sure, everything sucks. That's just...

Let me get my jacket.

[Bert] My fucking jacket!

[Staff]
Morning!

Make sure I'm in a good mood.

Times with more disappointment....

[Jennifer] Morning!

What is this going to be?

This is for the CAPITOL Intern,

documenting -- this is Martin,
Jennifer.

They're documenting a little bit here,

like the Erika also

afterwards
is still trampled underfoot.

And with the feet there, ne.
Please?

You can do it.
You just have to look angry, because of Erika.

- I can't.
- It's nonsense.

I have never been warned!

You can not three times a week

in the middle of the day
to your self-help thing,

constantly fooling around with goths in the hallway

And being paid as a full-time employee.
What's going on here?

Because of my soul,
because it is broken.

Because of everything here. Says Mrs. Löppke, too.

Knips times, how one here
with living employees.

Because Ernie is a friend,

who is dealt with in such a way.
Look depri...

No photos are taken here now!

- Next.
- Like this!

We meet at one in the confi!
The whole department!

Come, first photographic...

I don't want to!

I count down, then everyone looks depri.
Three, two, one.

You point to the nail.

Point correctly.

From time to time the king must show.
that he is king.

and have someone beheaded.

Simply because he is king.

Or just queen.

I didn't get that from Stromberg,
doesn't sound like him either.

I got this from a management book...

I don't find it now.

Lately the Ernie
has not been a full-fledged worker.

I don't really have
no time for this, so...

We'll go on at some other time.

[Tanja] Many of you recently had
the feeling that sometimes

react tense.

I have never been warned before.

[Tanja]
That is not the topic here.

- Anyway--
- [Ernie] Once, in kindergarten,

I broke a doll,
Mama had to come.

That was 40 years ago.

This is not about you now!

Congratulations, such a tone
relaxes the situation already...

[Staff]
Can we smoke?

No, there is no smoking here.

Let me explain why I think
find this billing system important.

- With the new system, we could--
- [Stromberg] There's the whole store....

[Tanja]
You're going to leave now, please.

Does anybody mind
that I am here?

If you
brought cake again...

Sure, witch cookies, for Tanja.

I would like to go on!

With Mr. Stromberg
I have never been warned.

On the contrary. I have often said
how great I think you are.

- Never either.
- Bullshit!

All the time! Tanja, just...
don't let --

Hello?

[Stromberg] In the company.
You lose your authority faster.

Than your innocence in the whorehouse.

As a woman now.

Once she is gone,
you won't get her back so quickly.

Neither the authority, nor the innocence.

As a man
you can easily claim both.

Is much harder as a woman.

At least in many cultural circles.

So, the innocence thing now.

Here at...

at Bibi Blocksberg.
[Laughter.]

Hex, hex!

Hex, hex!

Anyway, Tanja has
has now 'n problem

with authority. And I just don't.

Ne?

Chief is like genius.

Can't learn.

Anyway, I wouldn't know,
How I could tell someone...

- What now?
- Come with me.

So, say, now the guard duty.

on me.
These are police state methods!

You are not serious!

[Tanja]
I have asked you several times--

Again.

So, I think it's hacking!

So, now here is an end
with the nonsense!

They are bringing Mr. Stromberg out.

You can complain,
but out!

There will be consequences...
my coat.

You are banned from the house.

You have tried my patience
more than strained.

I have told Achim many times,
the door is broken.

- No coffee.
- Is it all?

It's stupid.

Store is closed today,
because of shooting match.

[Magdalena] But it's all good!

I have finished jacket.

Do you want to get dressed?

Not trying on now?

Not now, not tomorrow, not ever.

I have to get out of here, just get out of here.

[Stromberg]
Today it is our friend

Ernie, who catches a warning,
tomorrow every single one of you.

Or did you
something wrong?

I wanted to give something to Mia
because she is often sad.

At this point we don't want to talk about
about me.

Or do, briefly.

Martyr, yes...

Martyrs have always existed.

In the series I am nothing special.
But their

have to decide: Do you want to be
be an ass-kisser or an ass-kicker?

If yes, which ass--

- Meal.
- Meal.

Which ass are you going to kick?

Do you prefer Tanja
or rather Bernd?

[Stromberg]
The question is, do you want Bernd

have only now and then on memorial days,

or do you want the complete
and permanent Bernd?

The question is ultimately,
do you want the total Bernd?

What does it mean,
you want to vote, how it goes on?

I was treated unfairly--

That is not the point.

You have no real support here
in the department anymore.

It's about me too!

[We find,
that it is not going on with you.

[Tanja]
That's not for you to decide.

Ulf, why don't you say something?

I am so sick of this from both sides
I can hardly tell.

We will now here
certainly not vote,

who should be the boss.

- I would be for Stromberg.
- Me too.

Me too.

Are you now completely...
[Murmuring: "Yes", "Bernd"]

Stop this nonsense!

Otherwise will you let
by the security guard?

[All shout together]
Stromberg! Stromberg! Stromberg!

We just have here--

This is Frau Steinke.

Mr. Sartorius and his colleagues
from the head office.

Hello, nice to meet you.

It was about
about an organizational story.

The colleagues from the head office!

Stromberg. Bernd Stromberg.
Meal.

It was just about me.

You will be interested to know,
what the mood is at the base.

You are banned from the house!

And it is not good, the atmosphere....

there is 'n article published,
in the CAPITOL-Intern.

- You're leaving now!
- Leave it quietly.

[Stromberg]
It's about a dead colleague...

So much time must be.

It starts with the dead,
then I'll be right there.

Even in the present time...

[Stromberg] The Lion.
Does not eat the antelope,

To punish them,

but because he is hungry.

And no refrigerator.

Genetically, he can't help it.
Just like Tanja and me.

This is first of all not personal,
but purely...

genetic.

Yes.

[Tanja] We wanted to have
have transferred all the data, but there were

unfortunately some difficulties
with my staff.

The old accounting system is
You are all familiar with it now. I have--

[Board].
That's not what we're here for.

I can only apologize for that.

I guess some things went wrong.

[Becker]
Not looked through, before?

[Tanja] Yes, of course!

- I don't know what happened.
- Neither do I.

- I am sorry.
- Good, but --.

[Becker] Now nothing works at all?

[Tanja]
There is water, if someone of you

would like to have something to drink,
it takes

just a few more seconds, please.

- This...
- Yes, yes, is now...

Not so dölle run here

for Barbie Blümchen.

Whereas the daddy...
1-A finishes in Finsdorf,

the complete backing of the people here,
has become clear.

And the central fuzzies
were quite impressed by you.

From the next first sits here again

the one and the only...

[Tanja cries.]

Shit!

No bullshit for a change,

I find 's really great so.

[Tanja sobs]

You know, you are very slow

mutated more and more.

A few more months and you would have
a bald head and a beard.

[Both laugh restrainedly]
Mmh?

It's really not worth it.

[Stromberg]
Ah, umbrella, you piece!

- Not now.
- Come here.

Man!

Women.

[Bert] That symbolizes 'a tear.
[Bert] That's what the woman said.

Every tear from you is like a

Sea of sorrow,

In which I would like to bathe.

Is like...

Like a cold rain shower,

that wants to tell me something dark.

- That's nice.
- Yes?

I also had:
I am your puppet

you are my string puller.

I am your Berthold,
you be my Mia.

Then I thought that...

[Ernie cries]

[Ernie cries]

[Telephone rings]

[Phone rings]

[Phone rings]

Stromberg.