Stormester (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 7 - Camouflér dig på et billede - full transcript
Welcome to Stormester.
The program where I have knitted
a number of tasks together -
hoping to get rid of them -
- for a bunch of funny, beautiful,
wildly different celebrities.
The season is coming to an end.
Three of the participants do the same.
Christian Fuhlendorff.
Lina Rafn.
Nikolaj Stokholm.
Ruben Søltoft.
And Julie Ølgaard.
In their fight to win this
piece of divine craftsmanship -
- a bust ...
I wanted to finish the sentence,
but then I looked into the golden eyes.
And it's like looking
straight into the sky.
When you have
to say it yourself.
And I have to say most things, because
you five have solved a number of tasks.
You don’t know how you have fared
in relation to the other four.
Maybe you at home can come up with
other solutions that are better.
Everything the contestants do is
measured and evaluated by me -
- your dictator -
- in collaboration with my
caretaker, my timer, my surveyor -
- my Mark Le Fèvre.
- What have you been doing since last time?
- I've been inside and ...
Super exciting.
Here's what I made.
I've seen a program about -
how to breed dogs
to become obedient pets.
I saw that too.
If you want a dog
to be a skilled lap dog -
- then you have to give it
treats when it behaves properly.
Clever trick. You've already
done well today, Mark. Here you go.
Good assistant!
Skilled assistant!
- That's what's common.
- Chocolate.
What's tonight's prize?
We have asked a participant
to bring an item with them -
- which they cannot live without.
But which one must do without
if someone else wins that item.
How wonderful we are!
Who have we given the task to?
It’s Ruben Søltoft.
What did you bring?
Well uh ... say hello to my mom.
When it comes to my taste in women,
I range widely in terms of age.
How old is your mother?
Shut up!
- Hi, Ruben's mother.
- Hi hi.
If no one does well enough -
- it could be that the Taskmaster
wins Ruben's mother.
She wanted to come in and see
the recording. Then I said:
You can get a really
good seat on one condition.
Well, I can’t do without her.
She means everything to me.
She makes a wonderful
chicken tikka masala.
And is good for goodnight songs.
I got one last week.
I went out like a candle.
- Good luck, Ruben.
- Thanks.
I haven’t won in a long time.
I need to push myself.
Which task is first,
Mark Le Fevre?
It's a little sad that we're
approaching the end of the season -
- so we start with a real tear-jerker.
What?!
"Fill the egg cup with as
many tears as possible."
- "The one with the most tears wins."
- "You have 20 minutes."
"Time starts now."
So crying tears?
What should you see in the mirror?
Should one be sad to see oneself?
It's so touching to hear
you say that, Nikolaj Stokholm.
Do you often get sad when you
see yourself in the mirror?
No, I don’t know.
I'm 28, so I'm used to it.
But now we're talking about seeing
Nikolaj Stokholm ... Can we start there?
There must be a move ...
Yes! Yes, of course.
What are you doing?
Onions, pepper.
Yes, now it's coming. Yes yes.
- Can you see them?
- Yes, I can see them.
- Well, you have to count them or what?
- Yes.
What are you doing?
It must be in the eyes of hell.
That was one there.
There’s one.
It’s on its way.
So catch it, man!
God, there's an
onion sitting there.
It stings my face exceptionally.
And I'm not ready to smear
onions on my head again.
Do you think I should
go to the kitchen?
Uh no ...
I look forward to seeing
our professional actor -
- because I was actually
trying to cry -
- but I don’t own my emotions.
Onions are ...
When chopping onions -
or standing and looking
at one's aupair doing it -
- then it's like that ...
it stings and you cry.
- Mark Le Fevre, how did he do?
- Eight tears.
It was beautiful.
We don’t know if it was.
Who is the next stop on
our egg cup-tear journey?
- You can get Fuhlendorff.
- I'm taking him.
I just have to say something first.
I'm getting really upset right now.
But you can’t see it.
Maybe we get the explanation here?
My mouth runs completely ...
now, you just have to ...
It makes sense when
you see the clip.
Now it must be said ...
I have tear ducts in my mouth.
No?
I cry out in my mouth.
Now it's coming.
See how many tears and
saliva there is already.
How awful.
Then I will stop the time.
Well, but then it's
just measuring.
It's completely full.
Just go, Christian, that's fine.
Oops ...
I don’t think we should
talk so much about it.
Do you eat with your eyes or what?
We shouldn’t talk too much about it,
because I think it is uncomfortable.
I didn’t expect it was a handicap -
- I’d ever talk about.
No, now he's so sad,
he's going to drool.
You don’t understand how we with
tear ducts in our mouths feel -
- when people say we drool
when we watch a good movie.
Let's move on to the next one.
How much was it?
I guess we measure in milliliters.
He filled the cup to the brim.
With tears coming out of my mouth.
That's 49 milliliters.
If you want to
convince me of that -
- then you'll spit with
your eyes right now.
So far, there are 49 milliliters
of mouth tears in play.
Okay, I hear you.
And I admit that half of
that was saliva, too.
The other half were tears.
Fair enough.
It is noted.
In the meantime, we'll
see another one.
I have a video with
both Lina and Ruben.
Two very different solutions.
And I hope I never get
so close to Ruben again.
How do I handle it?
Was that a cliffhanger?
After all, I'm the kind of person who can cry
over a Merci [clothing store] commercial.
You can also just stop blinking -
- so in the end you start howling.
Bitch is tearing up.
Can you try to tickle me?
Now. We are a little busy.
I would like two egg cups.
- Can you keep them open?
- No, but it's coming.
- Was there one?
- I can promise you that.
Yes, that's good enough.
I've never seen anyone
cry in that color ...
Son of a bitch.
Am I nice now?
I would go so
far as to say ...
No, you just have to
keep quiet, I can sense.
There is a mirror.
Fuck!
Lina Rafn, is it true that you cry
when you think of a Merci commercial?
No, not when I think about
it, but if I see it -
- and they run the music and
they run toward each other -
- and there are
children and everything.
Lina Rafn, look me in the eye.
Even if there are Germans
in the commercials?
Yes. I can be touched
by all nationalities.
Also Germans?
Well, well.
You are a thumbs up in my adventure.
[Song from the Merci ads]
More acting is needed.
You're an elephant in my glass shop.
I can see it's not working on you.
But if you close your eyes and
don’t blink while looking at me.
But it's teamwork, where
Ruben is being teased here.
This is your first instinct:
I cry best with laughter.
As a comedian, it's a pleasure
to make people cry with laughter.
But not that way.
No.
It's a physically exhausting
task if you perform for 600.
Having to move around
from person to person.
How did Lina and Ruben
they handle the task?
I think we’ll stretch
the tension a bit.
- Who are we going to see in the meantime?
- You can get Julie Ølgaard.
Can you find me some water?
Some water.
You can just leave it at that.
Should I keep it?
It must be a little faster, Mark.
No, how slow he is.
Then you have to do it yourself.
What we are doing now is that
we are pouring water into your eyes.
You are welcome to do so.
It is completely
clean, Danish water.
There are no bacteria in it.
Now I start to cry.
Okay, are we ready?
No, there's one there.
Bone-dry cup!
Can't you see them?
I can feel them.
I have some bad news.
You must be able to see a drop,
because I can feel it.
Now the party’s over ...
Well, thank you.
- There are a lot of people here.
- How many were there?
I don’t know ... 20?
See you.
Julie, if you want to
make him really happy ...
No, can I have one?
Thanks.
There is no one ...? Well!
It's from Julie.
She would like to apologize -
- that she cried with laughter
while torturing you.
I'm going to do this -
- because it seems fair to
Fuhlendorff's four opponents.
I accept that one can
cry out of the mouth.
On the other hand, the tears
that come out are 49 ml each -
- so there is one tear
in his egg cup.
Don’t you want to tell us
what the position is -
- if Fuhlendorff's cup contained
one very moist mouth tear?
- What do you want to say?
- Thank you, Taskmaster.
I just want to hear if it counts,
if a little pee came out too.
No, do you suffer from that, too?
It depends on where
the pee came from -
- because now I'm confused.
It's my pee man
who cries a little.
Is that what you call 'a dripper'?
Like if it gives points.
I don’t think Ruben's
sad pee man counts.
And it's not sad either;
we know that.
I have rounded Fuhlendorff
to one big tear.
How is it distributed then?
There are 5 points for Lina Rafn.
22 tears.
4 points for Julie.
- 3 points ...
- Thanks.
- It's not something I decide.
- No, but you cried well.
Then there are 3 points for Stokholm.
2 points for Ruben.
- And 1 point for Fuhlendorff.
- That’s okay.
This is the penultimate program.
So there are five participants -
- we have looked at a lot.
Could we make it a little
harder to spot them?
Camouflage.
Green?
Good afternoon. Good morning.
Good evening. Good night.
It was hard to spot.
"Camouflage yourself
in a picture."
"You have 10 minutes
to plan your camouflage -
- and where to take the picture."
Where is Christian?
No, okay ...
"Time starts" ... at some point.
"Time starts now."
I can’t bear to smear myself
in mud for 10 minutes -
- and lay me out in a bush.
I'm just chewing on it.
I have a plan.
It still opens inwards.
I have been looking forward to this
task ever since I came up with it.
- How did we do?
- You must ...
We start with Stokholm.
You need to see if you
can spot him in the picture.
Now I understand why you immediately
knew what you were doing.
Nikolaj has grown up with
too little pigment in the skin.
Is it a hot tub?
- Have you found me?
- Yes, yes, yes.
It's a whirlpool tub.
And then it is well filled
with milk and grenadine.
You should have taken your glasses off.
Your skin would have fallen in.
Now you can’t come and say,
I'm as pale as milk.
That's great, Nikolaj.
Evil tongues will say:
Is that Photoshopped in?
But I have a clip where
you see him rise up.
If there are small children out there ...
maybe just a hand in front of the eyes now.
This is the new
wallpaper on my phone!
There is copyright, and you can buy it
on T-shirts for 250 kroner. [~US$41]
A good effort.
It was not impossible to find you -
- but I love the work you put into it.
It was to spot you.
I would say that.
But I'm tight with food waste.
It's a lot of milk.
It was all drunk the next day.
How did it taste?
You know that, because that's
what we get in our coffee out here.
I never think I will get over that.
You were an early favorite,
but I don’t really know anymore.
- Who are we going to see now?
- Lina Rafn.
It's a little harder right away.
It's my house seen from above.
- Ah! Okay.
- Did you find her?
She is lying on top of the shed.
Yes, that’s right.
We're talking about a whole
suit made of roofing felt.
Lina Rafn, an impressive
effort and nicely executed.
That was just before
we caught sight of you.
Who's next?
A man who can put himself
in the lead. Fuhlendorff.
It's the same Fuhlendorff
who's in the two, right?
The glasses act as a prism, and
then the light is refracted or ...?
I can’t remember my physics lessons.
Then I have to guess which of
them is Fuhlendorff, but they are both.
Whatever I guess, is that wrong?
No, no, it can move.
I'm guessing you're on the left
and the other one is you too ...
I don’t know.
- Left?
- Yes.
I'm in the middle!
If you guess it,
I think it's really nice.
And if you don’t guess it ...
... you're still beautiful.
I have to tell where
the idea came from.
I stood one night and had
to drop food down to my fish.
Then I had to grab something
and I couldn’t understand it ...
And suddenly it dawned
on me that reflection ...
It's wild.
The mirror ...
When you look through the glass,
do you see the hand somewhere else?
So that's what I do.
The aquarium enthusiast
got a great idea.
You had hidden so you could be seen -
- but I didn’t know
exactly where you were.
It's so insidious that
I can’t even fathom it.
You can have Julie Ølgaard next.
It's insidious!
I can help you a little.
I can put numbers on.
Can I exclude No. 2 and No. 9
who don’t have a body?
- She is thin.
- Yes, she's eel slim.
I can guess her.
After all, there are several of them
who don’t have the right hair color.
So I waver between
No. 8 and No. 10.
No. 8, there is a little
extra light curl behind.
And No. 10, I can’t see extra hair.
It's captivating TV, huh?
It's like watching a man of 46 discover
the book series “Find Holger” [“Where’s Waldo”].
You're right.
No zapping right now.
People are also sitting
and guessing right now.
I say No. 8.
Tha was a razor-sharp idea.
Don't be put off by the fact
that I could easily guess it.
You were really well camouflaged.
You had 10 minutes.
Then it can’t be perfect.
And the curls are so
easy not to hide, right?
I have that picture. When I can’t
sleep, I count Julie Ølfår.
And when you get to 12, you snore.
I'm so boring.
Now I can almost figure
out who we are missing.
- I'm guessing Ruben.
- You are so good.
It's completely impossible, so
you can also get some numbers on here.
I often have a hard time explaining
to my mother what my job is all about.
I still have it.
After tonight, you may
not find it difficult -
- because then you won’t
have your mother anymore.
I'm just reassuring. Fuhlendorff
does not cry in the picture.
It's just the tongue
that's out of the mouth.
So you know who it is?
Yes, because it's No. 9, right?
But shut up, a good piece of makeup -
- with eyes in the forehead.
Many people think it’s a fashion choice.
It's to dazzle.
When you pass a kennel, you think:
Oh, I fit in.
I clearly remember
when I lived there.
I would like to
move on to some points.
That effort with the roofing
felt suit was so compelling -
- so hard to see through,
so beautiful a picture.
That was where I spent
the longest time identifying.
First place for Lina Rafn.
Then it gets difficult.
A wagging Ruben tries
to get some attention.
Good Søltoft!
Now we are in something with effort -
- versus what an experience I had.
Several of you made a huge effort.
Who would I have
a hard time identifying?
If she had saved a little
hair, it would be Julie.
- I give her second place.
- Thanks!
I just saw you had the
chocolate bowl in front?
Yes yes.
Let's see who ends up
in the next place. Oh, heck.
There was hard work from Stokholm
to fill a bathtub with milk.
- Thank you so much for the coffee!
- Bon appetit.
I just thought about that again.
I drank the tub you've been in.
I would give you third place.
Now it goes instead -
- divided between Ruben and Fuhlendorff.
You get fifth place.
I loved your picture.
And I hate the idea that I drank
anything you've been lying in.
Well, yes yes.
What the hell.
Lines can be used as a lightning conductor,
and I can provide thunder coffee.
I don’t know how the coffee
has become thunder coffee -
- but if you have used
your bodily functions -
- to turn that milk jug
into a jaccuzi -
- then I'm glad I only
got two cups last week.
Lina Rafn is in the lead.
Such is the current score.
So what are we going to do now?
We're going for something
completely different.
Ah, I get it!
No, how nice!
Did you know -
- that as a child I was incredibly
fond of rubber ducks?
No.
Where should you also know it from.
No, how fine is that.
- Great.
- Thanks.
There is a task.
"Overturn all the rubber ducks."
"All attempts must be made
behind the red rope.”
"Fastest wins.
Time starts -
- when the first
rubber duck overturns."
Then just get started.
With what?
That is a good question.
"With what?!"
There are many different solutions.
Yes, you would think so.
Am I allowed to see
different solutions?
You can get a cocktail with
equal parts Lina and Stokholm.
- Fifty-fifty.
- A nice thing.
Not as easy as I thought.
I'm just trying to find something
long, anything I can work with.
No, that's a fucking plan.
- Do you want to read the task again?
- No!
I understand it.
And time is running!
Shit!
Behind the red rope?
"All attempts must be made
behind the red rope.”
2 clean.
And it is also overturned.
Well, was it a little
sugar from Stokholm?
Right after he tried to hit
a child with a wooden fence ...
This was a question
I never expected -
- I had to ask another grown man.
How does he kiss?
I will answer that
with a question.
We can quickly find out.
A bit like fried veal liver.
Dry, and not everyone likes it.
You should just rinse
with a glass of milk, huh?
Was it a thunder kiss?
Who was the fastest
when they realized -
- that they could
move the red rope?
We pull the tension a little more.
But of the two, Lina is the faster.
- Who now?
- Fuhlendorff, if you like.
- Yes, please. And Ruben.
- Both?
- Twice as good.
- Then we’ll do it.
Can you take this off?
I can’t.
I can’t be bothered.
Was there a single camera that didn't
get a little kiss from Ruben there?
We make television for hell.
No, you're doing ladies for hell.
Four coming.
He makes ladies ...
My mother claps.
Even if you lose your
mother, it seems like -
- there are some of the same age down
there who would like to go home with you.
You're sick in the head, man.
I just want to know ...
Julie wasn’t there.
She's got Mark for that.
For once, I was really
trying to play by the rules.
And I made an effort.
And you have to wear a
yes-hat when you see it.
Does the disqualification
button come in?
I hope not, because I
actually made an effort.
And then there was just one little
thing that didn’t quite play out.
But God, how well thought out.
And I think we need
to keep that in mind.
We need to keep in mind that time began
when you overturned the first duck.
And now we need to see Julie Ølgaard.
It's going really well
until it's not going so well.
Let's say I could tie
a string to something -
- that allowed me to pull
all the ends at once.
Is it okay if I'm just still
behind the red rope?
No.
No idea what I’ll pull in, but ...
We're trying.
Can we find some string?
Whoops, I think we should
get it up a bit.
- Don’t overturn anything.
- No no.
- You have to be damn careful.
- Yes, yes, yes.
Maybe there should be
one on each side, huh?
Yes, maybe ... you have to lead.
Oh! No!
Okay, shit.
Beware.
Behind the rope!
Julie!
Damn it! It must tip over.
- It's still up.
- Stupid duck.
It was such a good plan.
It was such a good plan.
The plan was perfect.
The execution ...
Not so good.
That was a good plan.
It was fucking cool.
I saw such a domino effect.
It was so good in my head.
The headline there was all:
Then it can also be just as much.
- It wasn’t so good.
- It was really well thought out.
It was just a pity that ...
Now I don’t have the button -
- but what am I going to say?
"How nice and sweet you are, Julie."
- Well, the button.
- It's my favorite button.
I think it's at home
on the bedside table.
It's a chocolate button, right?
Yes, I wrote on it in tiny letters:
"Julie, you're disqualified
for breaking the rules."
So Julie ends up with
zero points, but how ...
You don’t have to look far
for the chocolate buttons.
They are for those
who have done well.
Mark, you can get one if you
can give me the score.
If we take it from below:
Zero points for Julie.
It's not a shame for her
that she's doing it wrong.
I tried my best, Lasse.
It was really bad, your best.
2 points to Nikolaj Stokholm.
3 points for Lina Rafn.
There was just over
a minute between the two.
How fast was Lina?
Lina did it in 2 minutes flat.
But there are two
who did it better.
Ruben did it in 1:14
and gets 4 points.
And Fuhlendorff gets 5 points
with a time of 20 seconds.
Mark Le Fevre, have another.
Total score:
Lina Rafn leads with 13 points.
This is the penultimate
program of this season.
But I still think we should
have a little name round.
- Do you know what I mean?
- Completely.
It comes from the fact
that there is good news.
Now we can just take the task,
then I'll probably explain.
- Lina Rafn.
- Mark Le Fèvre.
Shall we have a baby?
Oh no.
It's a fetus.
In a stomach.
Is it yours?
"Name the child.
You have eight weeks."
"Who is it? Name the child. You
have eight weeks. Time starts now.“
Yes, yes, but is it my child?
You have eight
weeks to find out.
Is that a small dinky?
Is it a boy or a girl?
I think it's a girl.
His name should be John.
See you.
I'll figure it out.
So long, motherfuckers.
Oh oh oh.
We would like to
share the news with you.
Mark Le Fèvre and I
are in happy circumstances.
We've got a baby.
God, how cute you are
in that picture, Mark.
Fate ... we've found a baby.
It's a bit of a sad story.
We found a child left in
a pram in front of a cafe.
It's actually a really
nice picture, boys.
- And congratulations.
- Thank you.
We would like some
names to choose from.
We have stalled a bit
in the creative process.
I suggested Mjølner. [Thor’s hammer]
Mark wasn’t consulted.
- No.
- Well, that’s good.
If the child goes away,
it will come back on its own.
That was what I said.
You've had eight weeks
to come up with a name -
- and a presentation of the name.
Where do we start?
I really want to ...
Now I say 'I'.
I hope you too ...
Can we start with Lina?
Yes ... I 've thought about it
for a long time and found out -
- that you have to go
all in on the presentation.
I've called the coolest
performance collective -
- and they come and
present your child's name.
Here comes Disturbing Business.
What does it say?
I can’t see it.
It says Mogens.
In 14 years, the entertainment for
the confirmation is booked right now.
It's a little controversial for
a baby shower, but fair enough.
- What does it say?
- It says Mogens.
I like it for several reasons.
There may not be many who know
this, apart from the man himself -
- but my father's name is Mogens.
And I think it's
a name that's bubbling -
- just around the corner
as a new fashion name.
- I like it.
- I can do that, too.
- And it was great.
- Yes, so beautiful.
Who are we going to see now?
Someone I had actually guessed
would have bid with Mogens.
Stokholm.
I'm completely from scratch now.
I just run for a moment. So long.
It falls a little to the ground, because
I look like one from Disturbing Business.
I say the Danish National Church.
But we have also come from Earth,
and to Earth we must stay.
I have been commissioned
to baptize a child.
The child must be named P. Ølse.
And then you ask why.
I couldn’t get that far down;
it hurt like hell.
But the reason why the
child should be named ...
No, I'm fucking drunk.
The reason why the child
should be named P. Ølse is -
that if the child is bullied with
"your name is sausage" - [pølse]
- then it says, "yes, it really is.”
If they say “ølse rhymes with
pølse”, then the child says:
"No, because my name is sausage,
so you can’t rhyme."
So I made a bully-free name.
Because you can’t rhyme
anything with pølse.
I have a suspicion that Stokholm
has just always had a dream of -
- wearing a priest's frock and saying:
"The child must be named P. Ølse."
You have put on the priest's frock,
so you are actually best equipped for the task.
We'll have to see
the next presentation.
Julie, what do you have?
Say it's nothing with sausage.
I said that!
I have always learned that one
should go with their first instinct.
And that was John.
How many people think
John is a cool name?
I can’t think of a
bad person named John.
Johns are good people.
I've made a little poster.
- These are cool Johns.
- No, they’re good Johns.
- Where's John Mogensen? [singer-pianist]
- He ... There was no room.
It will be on another board.
- Elton John.
- Yes, and Farmer John.
John is just a name with power.
If your name is John,
you will go far in this world.
Like John Wayne, John McEnroe,
John Cleese, John Mayer.
You're all around.
He will be, too.
It's almost in the name of
John Goodman, he's a good man.
Exactly.
- I'm selling it to you, Julie.
- Cool. I like that.
- Mark, who are we going to see now?
- Ruben.
I have written a little song about
what the baby should be called.
Nice.
- Shall we sing choir?
- No.
Niels.
It's the greatest musical
anticlimax ever.
You didn’t even say
it with confidence.
You said it like a
Niels presenting himself -
- as an excuse.
Niels ...
"I'm sorry you have to meet me,
but that's the way it is."
I was entertained.
Did you like it?
Yes ... I have a little "but" ...
We've only got boy names so far.
Actually, I'm here to say:
You are the gender you feel like.
One can be a feminine
John, Niels, or P. Ølse.
- Who are we missing?
- Fuhlendorff.
Yeah, okay ... it takes a little.
I have been thinking about what kind
of name I should choose for your child.
I would find a gender-neutral name.
A unisex name.
Because I couldn’t see if
it was a boy or a girl.
And then I wanted a name
that asked a question.
Michael literally means
"who is Jehovah?" -
- and then I thought you're
the Taskmaster, so you're God -
- so I chose Micha, which is
a unisex version of Michael.
And I believe in it so much that
today I got it tattooed on my arm.
No, Christian.
Micha will be on your arm
for the rest of your life -
- hoping to win 5 points
in this task.
But I will judge it on what
we would like to baptize our child.
May I just say -
- think about it now -
- if you want to ...
I'm not crazy about the name P. Ølse.
I might end up in Hell -
- but I have already resigned
from the Danish National Church.
Meet Lucifer!
You cried out of your mouth!
I was ready to give you
1 point and last place -
- but that was the scariest
thing I've seen you say.
Well, it wasn’t me who said that.
I look forward to
seeing it on TV.
I'm crazy about the name John.
2 points for Julie.
3 points for a
tattoo for Fuhlendorff.
Then we have the two musical elements.
I laughed and laughed
and was also well entertained.
I'm pretty divided between Ruben
and Disturbing Business.
A shared first place
and 5 points each.
And so our child
was named as it is -
- with any couple having a child.
One decides, and the other
has a feeling of “Oh, okay.”
I’ll go out and take
off this awful robe.
We can look at the
score in the meantime.
Lina Rafn is set to
win Ruben's mother.
But notice the one who
has the best chance of -
- regaining his mother,
is not Ruben Søltoft.
Efforts are needed
in the very last task.
As always, this is
happening right now.
I think we should celebrate
the naming of Niels Mogens -
- or Mogens Niels -
- with a quick little word tennis.
And what is it about?
I choose Julie because I
like her and she is closest.
Thanks, Mark.
I like you, too.
Oh, it's long.
It’s good I didn’t get it.
That's what she said.
"Play table tennis with words."
"When the ball is within
striking distance, say a word -
- while pretending to hit
the ball with the paddle."
"The word must begin
with that letter -
- that was the last letter
in the previous word.”
"If you do not say a word
within the time it takes -
- to hit the ping-pong
ball, you're out. "
"After saying a word, run around
to the back of the queue -
- on the opposite side of the table."
"Mark will serve the first word
to the youngest participant."
"The last remaining participant wins."
We play once around the table
with the girls against the boys.
Are the players ready?
Well.
First round: Mark Le Fèvre.
Honningkage. [Gingerbread.]
Erik.
- Kumme. [Come.]
- What? [Hvad?]
- I didn’t hear it.
- She said “Kumme.”
No no.
You didn’t even try.
How do you think
your mother feels?
I said “Hvae” ... it's a-e.
That's not a word.
You sense that Mom is moving
away from home today.
But you'll get to
sit in the chair -
- and wave to her from there, because
we have to play the second round.
Mark Le Fèvre.
Sild. [Herring.]
Dragt. [Suit.]
Tumpe. [Moron.]
Ende. [End.]
Erektion. [Erection.]
I don’t know.
It was checkmate on “erection.”
It's a little unfair to use words
that make others so speechless -
- that they are not able
to continue playing.
No, I don’t know how to spell it.
- But you've experienced one?
- I have.
- And it ends in 'n'.
- Thank you.
- It was very early to quit.
- You say?
Served to Lina.
Mark Le Fèvre.
Snaps.
Satans.
Suppe. [Soup.]
- Ende.
- I said that before.
We have already handed
out 1 point to Ruben.
2 to Fuhlendorff.
3 to Stokholm.
There are 4 and 5 points at stake.
Served to Julie.
No longer around the table.
In the final, you just stay at
each end of the word tennis table.
- Popcorn.
- Nosser. [Nutsack.]
Rift.
Tis. [Piss.]
Sørens. [Shoot.]
Suppe. [Soup.]
Soup has been said before!
The winner is Lina.
We have tonight's winner.
The big winner is ...
I warm up and take my prize.
Lina Rafn!
Sorry, Ruben.
Lina Rafn has won
a Søltoft mother.
She is hers, and she can keep
her for at least a week.
Then it may be that she's
in favor of Ruben next week -
- when it’s the final of Stormester.
Remember the old Danish proverb:
Don’t cry overturned rubber ducks -
- unless you need
to fill an egg cup.
Thanks for tonight.
Danish text:
TopTexT
Anette Nielsen
The program where I have knitted
a number of tasks together -
hoping to get rid of them -
- for a bunch of funny, beautiful,
wildly different celebrities.
The season is coming to an end.
Three of the participants do the same.
Christian Fuhlendorff.
Lina Rafn.
Nikolaj Stokholm.
Ruben Søltoft.
And Julie Ølgaard.
In their fight to win this
piece of divine craftsmanship -
- a bust ...
I wanted to finish the sentence,
but then I looked into the golden eyes.
And it's like looking
straight into the sky.
When you have
to say it yourself.
And I have to say most things, because
you five have solved a number of tasks.
You don’t know how you have fared
in relation to the other four.
Maybe you at home can come up with
other solutions that are better.
Everything the contestants do is
measured and evaluated by me -
- your dictator -
- in collaboration with my
caretaker, my timer, my surveyor -
- my Mark Le Fèvre.
- What have you been doing since last time?
- I've been inside and ...
Super exciting.
Here's what I made.
I've seen a program about -
how to breed dogs
to become obedient pets.
I saw that too.
If you want a dog
to be a skilled lap dog -
- then you have to give it
treats when it behaves properly.
Clever trick. You've already
done well today, Mark. Here you go.
Good assistant!
Skilled assistant!
- That's what's common.
- Chocolate.
What's tonight's prize?
We have asked a participant
to bring an item with them -
- which they cannot live without.
But which one must do without
if someone else wins that item.
How wonderful we are!
Who have we given the task to?
It’s Ruben Søltoft.
What did you bring?
Well uh ... say hello to my mom.
When it comes to my taste in women,
I range widely in terms of age.
How old is your mother?
Shut up!
- Hi, Ruben's mother.
- Hi hi.
If no one does well enough -
- it could be that the Taskmaster
wins Ruben's mother.
She wanted to come in and see
the recording. Then I said:
You can get a really
good seat on one condition.
Well, I can’t do without her.
She means everything to me.
She makes a wonderful
chicken tikka masala.
And is good for goodnight songs.
I got one last week.
I went out like a candle.
- Good luck, Ruben.
- Thanks.
I haven’t won in a long time.
I need to push myself.
Which task is first,
Mark Le Fevre?
It's a little sad that we're
approaching the end of the season -
- so we start with a real tear-jerker.
What?!
"Fill the egg cup with as
many tears as possible."
- "The one with the most tears wins."
- "You have 20 minutes."
"Time starts now."
So crying tears?
What should you see in the mirror?
Should one be sad to see oneself?
It's so touching to hear
you say that, Nikolaj Stokholm.
Do you often get sad when you
see yourself in the mirror?
No, I don’t know.
I'm 28, so I'm used to it.
But now we're talking about seeing
Nikolaj Stokholm ... Can we start there?
There must be a move ...
Yes! Yes, of course.
What are you doing?
Onions, pepper.
Yes, now it's coming. Yes yes.
- Can you see them?
- Yes, I can see them.
- Well, you have to count them or what?
- Yes.
What are you doing?
It must be in the eyes of hell.
That was one there.
There’s one.
It’s on its way.
So catch it, man!
God, there's an
onion sitting there.
It stings my face exceptionally.
And I'm not ready to smear
onions on my head again.
Do you think I should
go to the kitchen?
Uh no ...
I look forward to seeing
our professional actor -
- because I was actually
trying to cry -
- but I don’t own my emotions.
Onions are ...
When chopping onions -
or standing and looking
at one's aupair doing it -
- then it's like that ...
it stings and you cry.
- Mark Le Fevre, how did he do?
- Eight tears.
It was beautiful.
We don’t know if it was.
Who is the next stop on
our egg cup-tear journey?
- You can get Fuhlendorff.
- I'm taking him.
I just have to say something first.
I'm getting really upset right now.
But you can’t see it.
Maybe we get the explanation here?
My mouth runs completely ...
now, you just have to ...
It makes sense when
you see the clip.
Now it must be said ...
I have tear ducts in my mouth.
No?
I cry out in my mouth.
Now it's coming.
See how many tears and
saliva there is already.
How awful.
Then I will stop the time.
Well, but then it's
just measuring.
It's completely full.
Just go, Christian, that's fine.
Oops ...
I don’t think we should
talk so much about it.
Do you eat with your eyes or what?
We shouldn’t talk too much about it,
because I think it is uncomfortable.
I didn’t expect it was a handicap -
- I’d ever talk about.
No, now he's so sad,
he's going to drool.
You don’t understand how we with
tear ducts in our mouths feel -
- when people say we drool
when we watch a good movie.
Let's move on to the next one.
How much was it?
I guess we measure in milliliters.
He filled the cup to the brim.
With tears coming out of my mouth.
That's 49 milliliters.
If you want to
convince me of that -
- then you'll spit with
your eyes right now.
So far, there are 49 milliliters
of mouth tears in play.
Okay, I hear you.
And I admit that half of
that was saliva, too.
The other half were tears.
Fair enough.
It is noted.
In the meantime, we'll
see another one.
I have a video with
both Lina and Ruben.
Two very different solutions.
And I hope I never get
so close to Ruben again.
How do I handle it?
Was that a cliffhanger?
After all, I'm the kind of person who can cry
over a Merci [clothing store] commercial.
You can also just stop blinking -
- so in the end you start howling.
Bitch is tearing up.
Can you try to tickle me?
Now. We are a little busy.
I would like two egg cups.
- Can you keep them open?
- No, but it's coming.
- Was there one?
- I can promise you that.
Yes, that's good enough.
I've never seen anyone
cry in that color ...
Son of a bitch.
Am I nice now?
I would go so
far as to say ...
No, you just have to
keep quiet, I can sense.
There is a mirror.
Fuck!
Lina Rafn, is it true that you cry
when you think of a Merci commercial?
No, not when I think about
it, but if I see it -
- and they run the music and
they run toward each other -
- and there are
children and everything.
Lina Rafn, look me in the eye.
Even if there are Germans
in the commercials?
Yes. I can be touched
by all nationalities.
Also Germans?
Well, well.
You are a thumbs up in my adventure.
[Song from the Merci ads]
More acting is needed.
You're an elephant in my glass shop.
I can see it's not working on you.
But if you close your eyes and
don’t blink while looking at me.
But it's teamwork, where
Ruben is being teased here.
This is your first instinct:
I cry best with laughter.
As a comedian, it's a pleasure
to make people cry with laughter.
But not that way.
No.
It's a physically exhausting
task if you perform for 600.
Having to move around
from person to person.
How did Lina and Ruben
they handle the task?
I think we’ll stretch
the tension a bit.
- Who are we going to see in the meantime?
- You can get Julie Ølgaard.
Can you find me some water?
Some water.
You can just leave it at that.
Should I keep it?
It must be a little faster, Mark.
No, how slow he is.
Then you have to do it yourself.
What we are doing now is that
we are pouring water into your eyes.
You are welcome to do so.
It is completely
clean, Danish water.
There are no bacteria in it.
Now I start to cry.
Okay, are we ready?
No, there's one there.
Bone-dry cup!
Can't you see them?
I can feel them.
I have some bad news.
You must be able to see a drop,
because I can feel it.
Now the party’s over ...
Well, thank you.
- There are a lot of people here.
- How many were there?
I don’t know ... 20?
See you.
Julie, if you want to
make him really happy ...
No, can I have one?
Thanks.
There is no one ...? Well!
It's from Julie.
She would like to apologize -
- that she cried with laughter
while torturing you.
I'm going to do this -
- because it seems fair to
Fuhlendorff's four opponents.
I accept that one can
cry out of the mouth.
On the other hand, the tears
that come out are 49 ml each -
- so there is one tear
in his egg cup.
Don’t you want to tell us
what the position is -
- if Fuhlendorff's cup contained
one very moist mouth tear?
- What do you want to say?
- Thank you, Taskmaster.
I just want to hear if it counts,
if a little pee came out too.
No, do you suffer from that, too?
It depends on where
the pee came from -
- because now I'm confused.
It's my pee man
who cries a little.
Is that what you call 'a dripper'?
Like if it gives points.
I don’t think Ruben's
sad pee man counts.
And it's not sad either;
we know that.
I have rounded Fuhlendorff
to one big tear.
How is it distributed then?
There are 5 points for Lina Rafn.
22 tears.
4 points for Julie.
- 3 points ...
- Thanks.
- It's not something I decide.
- No, but you cried well.
Then there are 3 points for Stokholm.
2 points for Ruben.
- And 1 point for Fuhlendorff.
- That’s okay.
This is the penultimate program.
So there are five participants -
- we have looked at a lot.
Could we make it a little
harder to spot them?
Camouflage.
Green?
Good afternoon. Good morning.
Good evening. Good night.
It was hard to spot.
"Camouflage yourself
in a picture."
"You have 10 minutes
to plan your camouflage -
- and where to take the picture."
Where is Christian?
No, okay ...
"Time starts" ... at some point.
"Time starts now."
I can’t bear to smear myself
in mud for 10 minutes -
- and lay me out in a bush.
I'm just chewing on it.
I have a plan.
It still opens inwards.
I have been looking forward to this
task ever since I came up with it.
- How did we do?
- You must ...
We start with Stokholm.
You need to see if you
can spot him in the picture.
Now I understand why you immediately
knew what you were doing.
Nikolaj has grown up with
too little pigment in the skin.
Is it a hot tub?
- Have you found me?
- Yes, yes, yes.
It's a whirlpool tub.
And then it is well filled
with milk and grenadine.
You should have taken your glasses off.
Your skin would have fallen in.
Now you can’t come and say,
I'm as pale as milk.
That's great, Nikolaj.
Evil tongues will say:
Is that Photoshopped in?
But I have a clip where
you see him rise up.
If there are small children out there ...
maybe just a hand in front of the eyes now.
This is the new
wallpaper on my phone!
There is copyright, and you can buy it
on T-shirts for 250 kroner. [~US$41]
A good effort.
It was not impossible to find you -
- but I love the work you put into it.
It was to spot you.
I would say that.
But I'm tight with food waste.
It's a lot of milk.
It was all drunk the next day.
How did it taste?
You know that, because that's
what we get in our coffee out here.
I never think I will get over that.
You were an early favorite,
but I don’t really know anymore.
- Who are we going to see now?
- Lina Rafn.
It's a little harder right away.
It's my house seen from above.
- Ah! Okay.
- Did you find her?
She is lying on top of the shed.
Yes, that’s right.
We're talking about a whole
suit made of roofing felt.
Lina Rafn, an impressive
effort and nicely executed.
That was just before
we caught sight of you.
Who's next?
A man who can put himself
in the lead. Fuhlendorff.
It's the same Fuhlendorff
who's in the two, right?
The glasses act as a prism, and
then the light is refracted or ...?
I can’t remember my physics lessons.
Then I have to guess which of
them is Fuhlendorff, but they are both.
Whatever I guess, is that wrong?
No, no, it can move.
I'm guessing you're on the left
and the other one is you too ...
I don’t know.
- Left?
- Yes.
I'm in the middle!
If you guess it,
I think it's really nice.
And if you don’t guess it ...
... you're still beautiful.
I have to tell where
the idea came from.
I stood one night and had
to drop food down to my fish.
Then I had to grab something
and I couldn’t understand it ...
And suddenly it dawned
on me that reflection ...
It's wild.
The mirror ...
When you look through the glass,
do you see the hand somewhere else?
So that's what I do.
The aquarium enthusiast
got a great idea.
You had hidden so you could be seen -
- but I didn’t know
exactly where you were.
It's so insidious that
I can’t even fathom it.
You can have Julie Ølgaard next.
It's insidious!
I can help you a little.
I can put numbers on.
Can I exclude No. 2 and No. 9
who don’t have a body?
- She is thin.
- Yes, she's eel slim.
I can guess her.
After all, there are several of them
who don’t have the right hair color.
So I waver between
No. 8 and No. 10.
No. 8, there is a little
extra light curl behind.
And No. 10, I can’t see extra hair.
It's captivating TV, huh?
It's like watching a man of 46 discover
the book series “Find Holger” [“Where’s Waldo”].
You're right.
No zapping right now.
People are also sitting
and guessing right now.
I say No. 8.
Tha was a razor-sharp idea.
Don't be put off by the fact
that I could easily guess it.
You were really well camouflaged.
You had 10 minutes.
Then it can’t be perfect.
And the curls are so
easy not to hide, right?
I have that picture. When I can’t
sleep, I count Julie Ølfår.
And when you get to 12, you snore.
I'm so boring.
Now I can almost figure
out who we are missing.
- I'm guessing Ruben.
- You are so good.
It's completely impossible, so
you can also get some numbers on here.
I often have a hard time explaining
to my mother what my job is all about.
I still have it.
After tonight, you may
not find it difficult -
- because then you won’t
have your mother anymore.
I'm just reassuring. Fuhlendorff
does not cry in the picture.
It's just the tongue
that's out of the mouth.
So you know who it is?
Yes, because it's No. 9, right?
But shut up, a good piece of makeup -
- with eyes in the forehead.
Many people think it’s a fashion choice.
It's to dazzle.
When you pass a kennel, you think:
Oh, I fit in.
I clearly remember
when I lived there.
I would like to
move on to some points.
That effort with the roofing
felt suit was so compelling -
- so hard to see through,
so beautiful a picture.
That was where I spent
the longest time identifying.
First place for Lina Rafn.
Then it gets difficult.
A wagging Ruben tries
to get some attention.
Good Søltoft!
Now we are in something with effort -
- versus what an experience I had.
Several of you made a huge effort.
Who would I have
a hard time identifying?
If she had saved a little
hair, it would be Julie.
- I give her second place.
- Thanks!
I just saw you had the
chocolate bowl in front?
Yes yes.
Let's see who ends up
in the next place. Oh, heck.
There was hard work from Stokholm
to fill a bathtub with milk.
- Thank you so much for the coffee!
- Bon appetit.
I just thought about that again.
I drank the tub you've been in.
I would give you third place.
Now it goes instead -
- divided between Ruben and Fuhlendorff.
You get fifth place.
I loved your picture.
And I hate the idea that I drank
anything you've been lying in.
Well, yes yes.
What the hell.
Lines can be used as a lightning conductor,
and I can provide thunder coffee.
I don’t know how the coffee
has become thunder coffee -
- but if you have used
your bodily functions -
- to turn that milk jug
into a jaccuzi -
- then I'm glad I only
got two cups last week.
Lina Rafn is in the lead.
Such is the current score.
So what are we going to do now?
We're going for something
completely different.
Ah, I get it!
No, how nice!
Did you know -
- that as a child I was incredibly
fond of rubber ducks?
No.
Where should you also know it from.
No, how fine is that.
- Great.
- Thanks.
There is a task.
"Overturn all the rubber ducks."
"All attempts must be made
behind the red rope.”
"Fastest wins.
Time starts -
- when the first
rubber duck overturns."
Then just get started.
With what?
That is a good question.
"With what?!"
There are many different solutions.
Yes, you would think so.
Am I allowed to see
different solutions?
You can get a cocktail with
equal parts Lina and Stokholm.
- Fifty-fifty.
- A nice thing.
Not as easy as I thought.
I'm just trying to find something
long, anything I can work with.
No, that's a fucking plan.
- Do you want to read the task again?
- No!
I understand it.
And time is running!
Shit!
Behind the red rope?
"All attempts must be made
behind the red rope.”
2 clean.
And it is also overturned.
Well, was it a little
sugar from Stokholm?
Right after he tried to hit
a child with a wooden fence ...
This was a question
I never expected -
- I had to ask another grown man.
How does he kiss?
I will answer that
with a question.
We can quickly find out.
A bit like fried veal liver.
Dry, and not everyone likes it.
You should just rinse
with a glass of milk, huh?
Was it a thunder kiss?
Who was the fastest
when they realized -
- that they could
move the red rope?
We pull the tension a little more.
But of the two, Lina is the faster.
- Who now?
- Fuhlendorff, if you like.
- Yes, please. And Ruben.
- Both?
- Twice as good.
- Then we’ll do it.
Can you take this off?
I can’t.
I can’t be bothered.
Was there a single camera that didn't
get a little kiss from Ruben there?
We make television for hell.
No, you're doing ladies for hell.
Four coming.
He makes ladies ...
My mother claps.
Even if you lose your
mother, it seems like -
- there are some of the same age down
there who would like to go home with you.
You're sick in the head, man.
I just want to know ...
Julie wasn’t there.
She's got Mark for that.
For once, I was really
trying to play by the rules.
And I made an effort.
And you have to wear a
yes-hat when you see it.
Does the disqualification
button come in?
I hope not, because I
actually made an effort.
And then there was just one little
thing that didn’t quite play out.
But God, how well thought out.
And I think we need
to keep that in mind.
We need to keep in mind that time began
when you overturned the first duck.
And now we need to see Julie Ølgaard.
It's going really well
until it's not going so well.
Let's say I could tie
a string to something -
- that allowed me to pull
all the ends at once.
Is it okay if I'm just still
behind the red rope?
No.
No idea what I’ll pull in, but ...
We're trying.
Can we find some string?
Whoops, I think we should
get it up a bit.
- Don’t overturn anything.
- No no.
- You have to be damn careful.
- Yes, yes, yes.
Maybe there should be
one on each side, huh?
Yes, maybe ... you have to lead.
Oh! No!
Okay, shit.
Beware.
Behind the rope!
Julie!
Damn it! It must tip over.
- It's still up.
- Stupid duck.
It was such a good plan.
It was such a good plan.
The plan was perfect.
The execution ...
Not so good.
That was a good plan.
It was fucking cool.
I saw such a domino effect.
It was so good in my head.
The headline there was all:
Then it can also be just as much.
- It wasn’t so good.
- It was really well thought out.
It was just a pity that ...
Now I don’t have the button -
- but what am I going to say?
"How nice and sweet you are, Julie."
- Well, the button.
- It's my favorite button.
I think it's at home
on the bedside table.
It's a chocolate button, right?
Yes, I wrote on it in tiny letters:
"Julie, you're disqualified
for breaking the rules."
So Julie ends up with
zero points, but how ...
You don’t have to look far
for the chocolate buttons.
They are for those
who have done well.
Mark, you can get one if you
can give me the score.
If we take it from below:
Zero points for Julie.
It's not a shame for her
that she's doing it wrong.
I tried my best, Lasse.
It was really bad, your best.
2 points to Nikolaj Stokholm.
3 points for Lina Rafn.
There was just over
a minute between the two.
How fast was Lina?
Lina did it in 2 minutes flat.
But there are two
who did it better.
Ruben did it in 1:14
and gets 4 points.
And Fuhlendorff gets 5 points
with a time of 20 seconds.
Mark Le Fevre, have another.
Total score:
Lina Rafn leads with 13 points.
This is the penultimate
program of this season.
But I still think we should
have a little name round.
- Do you know what I mean?
- Completely.
It comes from the fact
that there is good news.
Now we can just take the task,
then I'll probably explain.
- Lina Rafn.
- Mark Le Fèvre.
Shall we have a baby?
Oh no.
It's a fetus.
In a stomach.
Is it yours?
"Name the child.
You have eight weeks."
"Who is it? Name the child. You
have eight weeks. Time starts now.“
Yes, yes, but is it my child?
You have eight
weeks to find out.
Is that a small dinky?
Is it a boy or a girl?
I think it's a girl.
His name should be John.
See you.
I'll figure it out.
So long, motherfuckers.
Oh oh oh.
We would like to
share the news with you.
Mark Le Fèvre and I
are in happy circumstances.
We've got a baby.
God, how cute you are
in that picture, Mark.
Fate ... we've found a baby.
It's a bit of a sad story.
We found a child left in
a pram in front of a cafe.
It's actually a really
nice picture, boys.
- And congratulations.
- Thank you.
We would like some
names to choose from.
We have stalled a bit
in the creative process.
I suggested Mjølner. [Thor’s hammer]
Mark wasn’t consulted.
- No.
- Well, that’s good.
If the child goes away,
it will come back on its own.
That was what I said.
You've had eight weeks
to come up with a name -
- and a presentation of the name.
Where do we start?
I really want to ...
Now I say 'I'.
I hope you too ...
Can we start with Lina?
Yes ... I 've thought about it
for a long time and found out -
- that you have to go
all in on the presentation.
I've called the coolest
performance collective -
- and they come and
present your child's name.
Here comes Disturbing Business.
What does it say?
I can’t see it.
It says Mogens.
In 14 years, the entertainment for
the confirmation is booked right now.
It's a little controversial for
a baby shower, but fair enough.
- What does it say?
- It says Mogens.
I like it for several reasons.
There may not be many who know
this, apart from the man himself -
- but my father's name is Mogens.
And I think it's
a name that's bubbling -
- just around the corner
as a new fashion name.
- I like it.
- I can do that, too.
- And it was great.
- Yes, so beautiful.
Who are we going to see now?
Someone I had actually guessed
would have bid with Mogens.
Stokholm.
I'm completely from scratch now.
I just run for a moment. So long.
It falls a little to the ground, because
I look like one from Disturbing Business.
I say the Danish National Church.
But we have also come from Earth,
and to Earth we must stay.
I have been commissioned
to baptize a child.
The child must be named P. Ølse.
And then you ask why.
I couldn’t get that far down;
it hurt like hell.
But the reason why the
child should be named ...
No, I'm fucking drunk.
The reason why the child
should be named P. Ølse is -
that if the child is bullied with
"your name is sausage" - [pølse]
- then it says, "yes, it really is.”
If they say “ølse rhymes with
pølse”, then the child says:
"No, because my name is sausage,
so you can’t rhyme."
So I made a bully-free name.
Because you can’t rhyme
anything with pølse.
I have a suspicion that Stokholm
has just always had a dream of -
- wearing a priest's frock and saying:
"The child must be named P. Ølse."
You have put on the priest's frock,
so you are actually best equipped for the task.
We'll have to see
the next presentation.
Julie, what do you have?
Say it's nothing with sausage.
I said that!
I have always learned that one
should go with their first instinct.
And that was John.
How many people think
John is a cool name?
I can’t think of a
bad person named John.
Johns are good people.
I've made a little poster.
- These are cool Johns.
- No, they’re good Johns.
- Where's John Mogensen? [singer-pianist]
- He ... There was no room.
It will be on another board.
- Elton John.
- Yes, and Farmer John.
John is just a name with power.
If your name is John,
you will go far in this world.
Like John Wayne, John McEnroe,
John Cleese, John Mayer.
You're all around.
He will be, too.
It's almost in the name of
John Goodman, he's a good man.
Exactly.
- I'm selling it to you, Julie.
- Cool. I like that.
- Mark, who are we going to see now?
- Ruben.
I have written a little song about
what the baby should be called.
Nice.
- Shall we sing choir?
- No.
Niels.
It's the greatest musical
anticlimax ever.
You didn’t even say
it with confidence.
You said it like a
Niels presenting himself -
- as an excuse.
Niels ...
"I'm sorry you have to meet me,
but that's the way it is."
I was entertained.
Did you like it?
Yes ... I have a little "but" ...
We've only got boy names so far.
Actually, I'm here to say:
You are the gender you feel like.
One can be a feminine
John, Niels, or P. Ølse.
- Who are we missing?
- Fuhlendorff.
Yeah, okay ... it takes a little.
I have been thinking about what kind
of name I should choose for your child.
I would find a gender-neutral name.
A unisex name.
Because I couldn’t see if
it was a boy or a girl.
And then I wanted a name
that asked a question.
Michael literally means
"who is Jehovah?" -
- and then I thought you're
the Taskmaster, so you're God -
- so I chose Micha, which is
a unisex version of Michael.
And I believe in it so much that
today I got it tattooed on my arm.
No, Christian.
Micha will be on your arm
for the rest of your life -
- hoping to win 5 points
in this task.
But I will judge it on what
we would like to baptize our child.
May I just say -
- think about it now -
- if you want to ...
I'm not crazy about the name P. Ølse.
I might end up in Hell -
- but I have already resigned
from the Danish National Church.
Meet Lucifer!
You cried out of your mouth!
I was ready to give you
1 point and last place -
- but that was the scariest
thing I've seen you say.
Well, it wasn’t me who said that.
I look forward to
seeing it on TV.
I'm crazy about the name John.
2 points for Julie.
3 points for a
tattoo for Fuhlendorff.
Then we have the two musical elements.
I laughed and laughed
and was also well entertained.
I'm pretty divided between Ruben
and Disturbing Business.
A shared first place
and 5 points each.
And so our child
was named as it is -
- with any couple having a child.
One decides, and the other
has a feeling of “Oh, okay.”
I’ll go out and take
off this awful robe.
We can look at the
score in the meantime.
Lina Rafn is set to
win Ruben's mother.
But notice the one who
has the best chance of -
- regaining his mother,
is not Ruben Søltoft.
Efforts are needed
in the very last task.
As always, this is
happening right now.
I think we should celebrate
the naming of Niels Mogens -
- or Mogens Niels -
- with a quick little word tennis.
And what is it about?
I choose Julie because I
like her and she is closest.
Thanks, Mark.
I like you, too.
Oh, it's long.
It’s good I didn’t get it.
That's what she said.
"Play table tennis with words."
"When the ball is within
striking distance, say a word -
- while pretending to hit
the ball with the paddle."
"The word must begin
with that letter -
- that was the last letter
in the previous word.”
"If you do not say a word
within the time it takes -
- to hit the ping-pong
ball, you're out. "
"After saying a word, run around
to the back of the queue -
- on the opposite side of the table."
"Mark will serve the first word
to the youngest participant."
"The last remaining participant wins."
We play once around the table
with the girls against the boys.
Are the players ready?
Well.
First round: Mark Le Fèvre.
Honningkage. [Gingerbread.]
Erik.
- Kumme. [Come.]
- What? [Hvad?]
- I didn’t hear it.
- She said “Kumme.”
No no.
You didn’t even try.
How do you think
your mother feels?
I said “Hvae” ... it's a-e.
That's not a word.
You sense that Mom is moving
away from home today.
But you'll get to
sit in the chair -
- and wave to her from there, because
we have to play the second round.
Mark Le Fèvre.
Sild. [Herring.]
Dragt. [Suit.]
Tumpe. [Moron.]
Ende. [End.]
Erektion. [Erection.]
I don’t know.
It was checkmate on “erection.”
It's a little unfair to use words
that make others so speechless -
- that they are not able
to continue playing.
No, I don’t know how to spell it.
- But you've experienced one?
- I have.
- And it ends in 'n'.
- Thank you.
- It was very early to quit.
- You say?
Served to Lina.
Mark Le Fèvre.
Snaps.
Satans.
Suppe. [Soup.]
- Ende.
- I said that before.
We have already handed
out 1 point to Ruben.
2 to Fuhlendorff.
3 to Stokholm.
There are 4 and 5 points at stake.
Served to Julie.
No longer around the table.
In the final, you just stay at
each end of the word tennis table.
- Popcorn.
- Nosser. [Nutsack.]
Rift.
Tis. [Piss.]
Sørens. [Shoot.]
Suppe. [Soup.]
Soup has been said before!
The winner is Lina.
We have tonight's winner.
The big winner is ...
I warm up and take my prize.
Lina Rafn!
Sorry, Ruben.
Lina Rafn has won
a Søltoft mother.
She is hers, and she can keep
her for at least a week.
Then it may be that she's
in favor of Ruben next week -
- when it’s the final of Stormester.
Remember the old Danish proverb:
Don’t cry overturned rubber ducks -
- unless you need
to fill an egg cup.
Thanks for tonight.
Danish text:
TopTexT
Anette Nielsen