Step by Step (1991–1998): Season 6, Episode 14 - Future Shock - full transcript

Well, Dad, we're on our way
to Adam's funeral.

Funeral? I thought Adam
was getting married.

Wedding, funeral,
what's the difference?

Either way,
his life's over.

I mean, getting married

Thanks a lot, J.T.

Sam, Sam.
No, no, no. I just--

You're fine.

but, that's not
it either?

That's not it.

Well, look at the time.
Time to go.



Frank.

She'll understand.
No, honey.

Listen it-- Boy.
Gee, are you sure
you're okay?

Yeah, yeah.
I'll be as good as new.

You don't have to worry
about the swing set,

'cause I found
somebody else to build it.

Well, now, honey,
come on now.

You can't just get anybody
to build you a swing set.

It takes
a trained professional.

Somebody who really
knows what they're doing

and who has
all the right tools.

Bonjour.

My name's Ben.
I build things.

It says,
"If you could read this,
I'm probably workin'."



Hi!

It was such a lovely ceremony,
Mrs. Landers.

Yeah, your daughter
makes a beautiful bride.

I'm glad you could be here.

You are such
a darling couple.

So, when are you two
tying the knot?

Well, we're a long way
from that.

I mean, you know,
we've only been together
for eight months.

Honey, Ed and I
got married after two months.

Ed, come here.
I want you to meet
Dana and Rich.

They're thinking about
getting married.

No, actually,
we were just--

Hey, kids,
congratulations.

You're gonna
love being married.
You really are.

It's the best thing
I ever did.

Really.

Real happy
for you folks,

but we're not thinking
about marriage.

I mean, my career comes
before anything else.

Put a ring on
her finger, son.

She'll forget all about
this career garbage.

You're gorgeous!

Um, Mr. Landers,
um, today's woman is--

Honey, let's go sit down.
No, I was just
gonna tell him--

I know what you were
going to tell him.
Let's go sit down.

Bye, kids.

Hi, J.T.
and Samantha.

You are such
a darling couple.

Hey, ho,
take it easy there.

We just met,
so don't give her
any ideas, all right?

Marriage is out of
the question, okay?

Yeah, we're not sure
we're going to even
keep dating.

You were just
saying that, right?

I can't believe
I have this cold

and I'm trying to put
together a swing set.

You know, Frank, yesterday
I felt terrible.

I had the most awful cold.

I couldn't breathe,
I couldn't taste nothing.

And then,
one of my customers,

she gave me
this home remedy.

I-I am completely
a new man.

Really?
Yeah, she gave me
an extra bottle.

Here.
Right over here.

There you go.

what's in it?

Well, evidently,

it's just nothing
but natural ingredients.

She did mention
juniper berries,

but, it really is
a good fixer-upper.

You should try it.

Wow.

Did she,
say how much to take?

Yeah, she said just
take enough to feel better.

Okay, then I'll just
take a little bit here.

Boy, that warms
you right up, doesn't it?

You're sure
this is totally herbal?

Hey, my body
is my temple, okay?

I don't put nothing in there
that isn't absolutely
100% pure.

As a matter of fact,
I'm gonna take another
little swig

of this home remedy
cold medicine right now,

in case, you know,
I don't wanna have a relapse.

In case there's any
little bug in there,

I just get it
all cleared out.

Jean-Luc, you know,
my congestion is
almost cleared up.

I can breathe again.

You see that?

Just to
get it all cleared out.

You know, Frank--
What?

She said, "Jean-Luc, um,
you know, the more you take,
the better you gonna feel."

And-and-and I said,
"Really?"

And so, what I think
I'm gonna do is, I'll just
take a little bit more.

Just a little bit.

You know, just
to get it all cleared out.All cleared out.

Dana?

Nicole!
I can't believe it.

So good to see you.
It's good to
see you, too.

This is
my boyfriend, Rich.

And this is
my husband, Scott.

Rich Halke,
how are you doing?

Your husband?

Don't act
so surprised.

Everybody says you two are
getting married any day now.

Well, everybody's wrong.

So, how's school
up in Madison?

I quit college.

Scott and I just found out,
we're gonna have a baby.

A baby?

I-I thought you wanted
to go to law school?

Well, that's on the
back burner for now.

I want to stay home
and raise the baby.

Besides, Scott just
got a promotion.

He's the assistant
snack food manager
at the Piggly Wiggly.

Yep, with my new raise,

we'll be able to afford
our own modular home soon.

You mean a trailer?

Well, yeah.

Wow! Man!

You guys got it made.
Jeez.

A job.
A place to live.

A little baby on the way.

It just doesn't get
better than that.

That's enough, okay.

All you single gals,

Janet's going to throw her bouquet so we can find out

who is going to be next
to be married.

Dana, let's go try
and catch the bouquet.

I'd rather French kiss
Bob Dole. Thanks.

Well, I'm going.
I'm going, too.

Hey, ho-ho,
excuse me.

You can't catch
the bouquet.

No, but I can knock it away
from Sam.

Go on, Dana.
It's not too late.

No, really.
I think I'll just sit here.

Congratulations.

Hey, you guys see this?

Looks like we're next.
Hey, hey!

Well, glory be, Dana Foster
caught the bouquet.

It's a sign from God.

I think I'm having
chest pains.

Dana, I was hoping
you'd catch the bouquet.

I told you
you'd be next.

You're gonna be pregnant

and big as a house
before you know it.

Okay, everybody,
time to limbo.

You know, you look
like you could use
a glass of champagne.

Bring the bottle.

You're gonna be pregnant
and big as a house

before you know it.

It's a sign from God.

Yeah.

Hey, honey, come on out.
It's a beautiful day.

Just as pretty as the day
I married her and twice
as much to love!

Come on out,
kids, breakfast.

Hey, there, Rich Jr.

Hey there.
How you doin'?

Hey, little Dana.

Littler Dana.
Tiny Dana, hey.

Hey! Ross, don't pick
your nose there, kid.

Ins there any chance,
maybe after the baby's born,

I could actually
attend law school?

I mean, I was
accepted at Harvard.

What, you mean,
you wanna be at Harvard,

rather than here
in paradise?

Well, it always was
kind of a dream of mine.

Rich,
could you give us a hand?

Yeah, sure thing,
Mother Lambert.

Well, I'll go help
your parents.

Hey, kids. Hey, hey.
Looking good, Mr. L.

Hey. Hey, Mr. L,
how about those
reflexes?

Okay, there ya go,
Frankie.

Grandpa, Grandpa,
I lost a tooth.

Can I have some money?

Carol?

Reach on in
Frankie's pocket here,

see if you can roam around
and find a quarter.

Frankie,
you old rascal.

Eighty-two years old
and he's still a pistol.

Go sit down.
I'll pay you later.

Mom, you look great.

Well, how come you're 82
and you have the body of
a 24-year-old?

Well, one word...
ThighMaster.

So, how's my little
baby machine?

Mom, can I ask
you a question?Absolutely.

Did you ever regret
having so many kids?

No!

Speak for yourself.

I'm 82 years old.
I'm taking my first
tennis lesson.

That reminds me.

and see if you can find
a tennis ball?

Frankie, not in
front of the kids.

Well, you okay, Frankie?

Okay, we have to go.

Yeah, before we play tennis,
we're stopping for lunch.

Lunch?
That reminds me, honey,

why don't you reach on in
Frankie's pocket

and see if you can
find a Happy Meal?

Frankie.

Dana.

I'm so glad you're here.

I flew in to thank you
for not going to Harvard.

Well, because
you didn't go,

there was a space for me.

And today, they made me
a Supreme Court Justice.

No way, honey!
How about that?

Karen here's
a Supreme Court Justice

Don't you think
that's funny, Dana?

Dana...

Dana? Dana?

Don't touch me,
I'll get pregnant.

I think you and your mother
need to have a little talk.

Jean-Luc?
Yeah.

Where are ya?
Well...

I... I'm right here.

Well, I've fallen and
I can't get up.

You think that's bad?
I'm up and I can't fall down.

Okay.

I can't fall down.
Here we go.

I think... I think
I see a thing...Upsy-daisy.

...that could help me
get in the place of...

We're just a couple of
swingin' guys.

Frank, we're home.

Hi, Carol!

My God,
they're bombed.

Have you two been drinking?

Well, no.

But we have
been taking

Yes, but, honey,
it's herbal.

It's made entirely
out of the juice
of buniper jerries.

You mean
juniper berries?

Well, so is gin.
Mrs. Thompson
is a big lush.

Well, yeah.

I think I'll go
make some coffee.

I cannot believe you two
took some homemade medication

from some old bat
who whipped it up

in her kitchen sink
without knowing what's in it.

I mean, you guys are lucky
you're just drunk.

You could've been killed.

Wow!

Hey. Hey.
Shh.

We are not drunk.

And you wanna
know how I know?

How?

how could we construct
such a fine swing set?

So, Rich, buddy.

Dana caught
the bouquet?

You've got
big problems, bud.

Come on.

Are you crazy?

My career comes before
anything else.

That's like being married
to Cujo with a law degree.

Cujo with a law degree.

Cujo with a law degree.

Hello.

J.T., my best friend.
How are you?

Listen, I really
can't talk right now.

Dana's on her way home.

Yeah, it's our anniversary.

I want everything
to be really romantic.

I got champagne, candles,

even had my hair done.

I'm home.

She's home.
Listen, I gotta go.

Okay, I'll talk to you
later, kisses.

Hi, honey.

Why is it so dark in here?

Well, I,

Yeah?

Why's that?
Um, well...

Sweetheart, it's the...

My God.

I can't believe
I forgot.

I forgot to file briefs
on the Maxwell case.

I gotta go back
to the office.

Sweetheart,
it's our anniversary.

Today?

Are you sure?

Okay.

Um, well, then...

Just forget it.

You go on back
to your office.

Come on, you never...

even look at
me anymore.

Do you know that I got
my hair done today

just for you

Looks great.

Too late.

You know...

But you know what?

I don't know you anymore.

Okay. Honey.

Look, I love you.

I mean, you're my wife.
I-I mean, my husband.

Look, I know I spend
too much time at the office,

but it's only because
I want to get you all of
the things that you want.

I mean, this house,

That new kitchen
you want.

I need you.

Look, you're right.

Forget about the office.
Forget the briefs.

You're not
just saying that?

No, honey, I mean it.

You are the most important
thing in my life.

Dana Foster.

Right now?

Okay, I'm on the case.

Honey, love ya.
Gotta go.

What--

Just like that?
Sweetie, you--

It... It's our anniversary.

Yeah.
Happy anniversary, Rick.

It's Rich.

It's Rich!

Rich!

Rich!

Rich.

Rich!

Rich?

Dana.

I just had the weirdest vision
of our future together.

Was I pregnant?

No.

Yeah?

we were living in a trailer
with eight kids,

and you wouldn't let me
go to law school.

I wouldn't--
Excuse me, um...

I wouldn't let you
go to law school?
I'm sorry.

You know I would
never do that.

Dana, I-I want a family,

yeah, but I want you
to have a career, too.

I know how important
that is to you.

Good. Thanks.

I just hope that,
when you become

a big-shot lawyer,
you won't forget
all about me.

I could never
forget about you.

And then you jetted off
to New York and you left me
crying on the bed.

Believe me, if we got married,
it would never be like that.

Really?
I promise.

I'd like to
make a proposal.

Proposal?

Dana Foster,

in sickness
and in health,

ever...

I do.

We'll be right back
for the conclusion of

Murder, She Wrote.

Hey, Carol?

It's almost noon.
That's right, Frankie.

It's time for dinner.
Okay.

after 67 years,

we're finally all alone.

Now we can do what
we always wanted to do.

In the middle
of the afternoon?

You betcha!

Hot diggity.
Yes.

I tell you what,
I'm gonna go upstairs

and slip into
something flannel.

I'm right behind you,
love puppy.

Wait for your old
stud muffin.

Here he comin' now.

I'm right
behind you, baby.

I'm--

Where the hell was I going?

Who the hell am I?

Where's J.R.?