Step by Step (1991–1998): Season 3, Episode 6 - Video-Mania - full transcript
When Mark frets over getting his first "A" (instead of the A-pluses he has been so accustomed to), Frank decides the best way to relieve the tension is to play video games. However, Mark quickly becomes a video game addict, forcing Carol to take drastic steps to break her son out of his new addiction. Meanwhile, Cody drives Dana nuts with his ways of trying to cure the common cold ... with mind power.
[CLEARS THROAT]
[GRUNTING]
[GRUNTING]
[GRUNTING]
Cody, what's the problem?
Got another one of those
nasty fur balls?
[SCOFFS]
Ah, no, I just got
this humongous cold.
Well, why don't you
take some cold pills?
No way. My body's a temple.
[SCOFFS]
I don't put anything in it
that isn't completely healthy.
Except for the occasional
double king egg
chili cheese bacon burger.
[SIGHS]
[GRUNTING]
Cody...
before some lonely goose
gets the wrong idea
maybe you should go down
to the health food store.
There's all kinds of
natural remedies you could take.
Wow, great idea.
[LAUGHING] Yeah.
Doctor Dana Burger
comes through again.
I really owe you for this one.
I mean, anything you want
you just say the word.
I just want some
peace and quiet.
Peace and quiet.
Okay.
Hey, you guys,
kitchen's off limits!
Dana wants peace and quiet.
I'll just stay right here
and make sure nobody bothers ya.
[LAUGHS]
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
Download MyTotal.TV to watch your favorite TV
www.mytotal.tv THE BEST TV APP
[SCREAMING]
MAN:
♪ The dream got broken
♪ Seemed like all was lost
♪ What would be the future
♪ Could you pay the cost?
♪ You wonder
♪ Will there ever be
♪ A second time around?
WOMAN:
♪ Woah-a, woah-a
♪ When the tears are over
♪ And the moment has come
♪ Say "My Lord,
I think I found someone"
♪ And no one would be better
♪ To be putting it together
For the second time around
ALL:
♪ Step by step, day by day
WOMAN:
♪ Day by day
ALL:
♪ A fresh start over
♪ A different hand to play
♪ The deeper we fall
♪ The stronger we stay
MAN:
♪ It will be better
♪ The second time around
ALL:
♪ Step by Step, day by day
WOMAN:
♪ We'll make it better
MAN:
♪ Second time around ♪
Wait a minute, Frank.
Don't put the mustard in there.
Oh, honey,
I'm using your system.
I'm putting everything away
according to food groups,
and then, alphabetically
within the group.
Well, I know.
But, I've decided to rethink
my entire storage system.
Because, I think, if it's
just a little, too neurotic.
So, from now on, just...
put everything
in the shelves alphabetically,
and to heck
with the food groups.
-Hey, Carol.
-Hi.
Hey, dad, you know
how you're always telling me
to get more involved at school?
Well, today I signed up
for an after-school activity.
Alright, that's wonderful.
What are you doing?
I'm the crossbar monitor
at the girls' high jump pit.
So, your job is to sit there
and look up girls' shorts?
Pretty cool, huh, dad?
Oh, I'm truly proud.
I'm gonna go see if
Dana's camera has a macro zoom.
[LAUGHS]
This is the worst day
of my life.
Why? What happened?
I was completely humiliated
at school.
Oh, did Al stuff you
in your locker again?
Yeah,
but, that's not the problem.
I just got my math test back.
I'm slime.
Mark, you got an A,
what's wrong with that?
It's not an A plus.
See? No happy face.
Well, listen,
if that's what's bothering ya
I'll draw you a happy face
and a little duck too.
[LAUGHS]
You guys just don't understand.
I'm losing my edge.
If this keeps up,
I won't be the valedictorian
of the eighth grade.
This has gotta stop.
Is it just me or, is your son
wound a little tight?
Yeah, you're right,
he's so compulsive.
I don't know
how he got that way.
No, Frank,
the peaches don't go in there.
They go in
the L-M-N-O-P cabinet.
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
Om.
Om.
Om...
♪ On the range
♪ Where the deer and the...
DANA: Karen, come here,
you got to see this.
♪ Roam
♪ Boom shaka-laka-laka
♪ Boom shaka-laka-laka
♪ Boom shaka-laka-laka
boom shaka-laka-laka ♪
Uh, Cody?
[CHUCKLES] Hey, Karen.
You caught me at mid shaka-laka.
[LAUGHS]
-What are you doing?
-I'm curing my cold.
Hey, Dana, thanks for sending me
over to that health food store.
I got something that
totally changed my whole life.
Check this out.
"Healing your body
with your mind."
[LAUGHS] Yeah.
Everything I need
to stay healthy
is right up here
in the old casaba.
You bought this pamphlet
at the health food store?
No way, I bought it
in the parking lot
of the health food store.
It was totally spiritual, dude.
He was looking
for his shoes in the trash.
He said that I could use
the powers of my mind
to cure many of life's
every day ailments
like your common cold, your flu.
The heartbreak of psoriasis.
Cody, did it ever occur to you
that this guy
was just a nutcase?
[SCOFFS] All I know is this.
He did not have a cold.
Coincidence?
I think not.
Om.
Om.
♪ MacDonald had a farm
♪ E-I-E-I ♪
Om.
Oh, Frank, you're not trying
to get the Playboy channel
for free again, are you?
Now, why would I need
the Playboy channel
when I have you?
Alright, Frank, who is she?
Oh, I see.
-It's, uh, mood swing day.
-Oh, I'm sorry.
I guess I just had
a tough day at the beauty shop.
I mean, what do you do with
a bald woman who's in denial?
Anyway, what are you doing?
Well, you know,
I've been thinking about
how uptight Mark has been,
and I decided that he just needs
a little entertainment
in his life.
So, look,
I bought him this.
"Super Video Buster?"
Gee, I don't know, Frank.
You know, kids get so
caught up in these video games
they forget to do
their homework.
Honey, we're talking about Mark.
He wanted to know
if we are gonna spend
our next vacation
at the library of congress.
Can you believe
this encyclopedia
still calls the Apatosaurus
a brontosaurus?
Is there no pride in
species identification
anymore?
Mark, why don't you take
an itty-bitty break
from brain-land, huh?
And check this out.
Frank, I appreciate the offer
but, I'm just
not into video games.
Oh, come on, Mark.
Everybody's gotta kick back
every once in a while.
Why don't you
just give it a try?
Well, I have been curious about
this new 64-bit microprocessor.
"Motherboard Magazine"
gave it a rave review.
Well,
I got a lot of video games
but, I thought first we'd try
"Alien Warlords."
Oh, Frank,
that sounds awfully violent.
[LAUGHS] Yeah.
Wait till you see it.
Hmm, high resolution graphics.
Over a thousand pixels
per square inch.
Very impressive.
-Hey, I got one.
-Hey, hey, good shot.
-Oh, I got another.
-Ha.
Ha! I blew his
little alien head off.
Oh! Wait till you get
to level two.
When you shoot
the alien in the head
his eyeballs explode.
It's beautiful!
Hi, Daddy. Hi, Carol.
FRANK: Hey, pal,
how was school?
Great! We made
Billy Jenkins laugh so hard,
he blew chocolate milk
out of his nose.
Don't get any
better than that.
-Is Mark home?
-No, not yet.
Good. Now, maybe someone
else can get a turn on
Video Buster.
You know, Mark's been
playing with that thing
an awful lot this week,
I'm getting kind of
concerned.
Honey, give the kid a break.
He's just acting like a
normal child.
Hi, guys. Bye, guys.
Mark.
No time to talk, I've got
a date with level eight.
See? I told you,
he'd love that video game.
Hey, guys.
I had the best day
at school today.
Did you stuff Mark
in his locker again?
Well, yeah,
but, that's not the good part.
Mark got a D on his math test.
Mark got a D?
[CHUCKLES]
Yeah. Can you believe it?
Mr. Wizard crashed and burned.
I gotta go tell J.T.
Mark got a D?
Oh, thanks a lot, Frank.
Your stupid video games
are ruining my son.
Well, now, honey, just relax.
We'll go have a talk with Mark.
I'm sure there's
a logical explanation.
A video game does not
drastically alter
a kid like Mark.
Give me that joystick or, I'll
crush your head like a peanut.
Mark.
-Hey, hey, hey. Hey.
-Mark.
-Give me that cable.
-Mark.
-It's my game, I want it.
-Stop.
I want that joystick.
Give me that joystick.
I want that joystick,
give it here.
Stop.
I want it. I want it.
-Let me at him.
-Mark, would you stop it?
What is going on?
He was trying
to take the game from me.
Normally,
I'd just kick his butt.
But, I think he's possessed.
Brendan, we'd like
to speak to Mark alone, okay?
Okay, but, don't turn
your back on him.
Alright, Mark, sit down here.
What is wrong with you?
First, you're fighting
with Brendan, and what is this
I hear about you getting
a D on your math test?
Oh, is that out
on the street now?
From now on, there will be
no more video games
during the school week.
-None?
-None!
Your mother's right, Mark.
This is serious.
You're starting to act like...
one of my kids.
Gee! I had no idea.
[SIGHS]
Guess I kinda got
carried away, huh?
Yes, I guess so.
So, why don't you go upstairs
apologize to Brendan
and start your homework?
Good idea, mom.
Hey, Mark.
Do I still have to apologize?
[WHISPERING] Frank.
Frank.
-Frank!
-No, mommy, not the tap shoes.
Shh.
Listen...
[THUDDING]
-What is that?
-I don't know.
[THUDDING]
It's coming from downstairs.
Oh, my God.
Maybe it's a burglar.
Maybe he's strung out on drugs
and has a gun
and is ready to shoot
anything that moves.
Go check.
Oh, sure.
They want equal pay
but, I gotta take a bullet.
[SIGHS]
[SIGHS]
Frank, would you
just get downstairs?
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
-Go, go, go. Go.
-Okay, okay.
Mark?
What are you doing?
Trying to get to level ten.
It's 3 o'clock in the morning.
Good, then it
gives me four hours
until I gotta go to school.
Four and a half
if I go in my pajamas.
Mark, you turn that thing off
right now.
No way, I'm just about to win.
Mark, give me that.
Mark, you are out of control.
No, I'm not out of control.
You can't be
a master of the universe
if you're out of control.
Frank, plug that back in.
Okay, Captain Kirk.
-Hey! Hey!
-I'm beaming you back upstairs.
-Put me down.
-Don't force me to use
the Vulcan death grip.
MARK: Frank, I'm warning you.
I've read several books
on karate.
Hiyah! Yi-yah-yah!
[CLINKING]
[CLINKING]
Do you have to do that?
-Is it bothering you?
-Yes.
Then I have to do it.
Hey, hey.
Boy, nothing works up
your appetite
like a nice big day
of recreational welding.
Cody, what is that?
Oh, it's an ashtray.
You don't smoke.
Okay, then it's a paperweight.
[LAUGHS]
You don't have a desk.
Then it's a '57 Chevy.
Who cares? It looks cool.
Guys, I'm in big trouble.
Look!
Whoa, a hickey.
[LAUGHS]
Mark of the "Love Jones."
[CODY LAUGHS]
Actually,
it's the mark of Steve Jones.
Whoa, that is some hickey.
What did you do?
Drag him around school all day?
This isn't funny, Dana.
If mom sees this,
she'll kill me.
What am I gonna do?
Here's a thought.
Don't let guys
suck on your neck.
You know, Karen,
swapping monkey bites
is no way to say "I love you."
But, there's no use crying over
spilled blood
So, the Codeman, with his powers
of psychic healing
is gonna help you
in your time of need.
Cody, you're not
gonna do one of your
"Hocus-Pocus, Let's All Focus"
numbers, are you?
Scoff if you will, non-believer.
But, I had a major cold.
I took no medication.
I just got plenty of rest
drank lots of fluid and used
only the powers of my mind.
And now a mere
seven to ten days later...
[SNAPS FINGERS] I am cured.
I'll try anything.
Go ahead, Cody, heal me.
Okay.
[EXHALES]
Hickey, hickey.
Heal hickey, heal hickey.
Hickey, hickey heal.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka. Boom.
Well?
Boy, that sucker
must go straight to the bone.
[LAUGHS]
This calls for
emergency medical procedure
Free association.
Okay.
Hickey.
Ricky.
Ricky Nelson.
Ozzy Nelson.
Paul Nelson.
"Full House."
[GASPS] Little Michelle.
[LAUGHS]
[EXHALES]
Seashell.
Turtle shell.
Turtleneck.
[GASPS] Dude, that's it.
-What's it?
-Turtleneck.
Wear a turtleneck
till your hickey goes away.
[LAUGHS]
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, Cody, you're amazing.
[LAUGHS]
Alright.
Yeah.
Guess between the known
and the unknown,
lies the Codeman.
Now I know why "Hee Haw"
ran for 21 years.
I don't know
why you brought me here.
This is a complete
waste of time.
Oh, face it, Mark
you're addicted
to that video game
and we have to do
something about it.
Hi, you must be the Lamberts.
I'm Ed Wheeler.
Welcome
to Video Addicts Anonymous.
Hi, I'm Carol,
and this is my husband, Frank.
And this is
our little addict, Mark.
Nice to meet you, Mark.
You know,
this is a support group
to help people who are
video game addicts.
And I'm sure you do
terrific work.
But, the truth is, Ed..
May I call you Ed?
Sure.
I'm not a video game addict.
In fact, I've never even
played one until last week.
Well, he's right about that.
In fact, he wouldn't have
played one at all
if Frank hadn't brought
one home
to help him relax.
What are you saying?
Now this is all my fault, huh?
Well, you are the one
who got him hooked.
FRANK: Honey, I was just
trying to help him out.
I mean, he's got a mother who
alphabetizes canned goods, huh?
No wonder he's so compulsive.
Oh, so now it's my fault.
Well, honey, I'm telling you--
Ah, folks, folks.
We're here to help Mark.
But, there is a group
for troubled marriages
down the hall.
Oh! No, no, no, no.
We have a very healthy marriage.
There's just
this one little issue
which will be solved as soon as
my husband admits
that I am right.
[CHUCKLES]
We'll be down the hall.
Everything's gonna be okay.
You be a brave little boy
for mommy
and just remember
how much mommy loves you.
I love you so much, and this is
gonna be great for you, honey.
Is there any wonder I still
sleep with a night light?
Okay, everybody,
let's get started.
I'd like to introduce
a newcomer to the group.
Everyone, this is Mark.
ALL: Hi, Mark.
Hello. Friendly bunch.
Alright, who'd like to be
the first to share tonight?
Yes.
Hi, My name's Scott.
I'm a video game addict.
ALL: Hi, Scott.
It's been about three days
since I've...
You know...
played a video game.
[APPLAUDING]
It's been tough,
it's been real tough.
But, the good news is
I'm starting to get used to
the sunlight again.
[APPLAUDING]
So, Mark, would you
like to share a little
about your problem?
What problem?
I don't have a problem.
Mark, anything you say here
is confidential.
All we wanna do is help.
Listen, Ed, I don't
wanna seem ungrateful
but, I just don't need your help
because I don't have a problem.
Sounds like you're
in denial, Mark.
That's the first sign
of a video addict.
I am not in denial.
Oh, anger.
That's the second sign.
Listen, red...
I am not in denial,
I am not a video game addict,
and I am not angry.
You know, maybe Mark's right.
Maybe he's not addicted
to video games.
By the way, Mark, how's school?
Still getting straight As?
Well, there's been
a little setback, but, so what?
What about fights?
Been in any fights lately, Mark?
One slight altercation.
But, he deserved it.
How are you sleeping?
Sleeping?
Yeah, hard to turn
that game off and go to bed?
It's none of your business.
Do you always have to get
to the next level?
Leave me alone.
Is it tough to go to sleep
if you haven't got
the highest score?
But, I always have
the highest score!
I always get to the next level.
I'm the best.
I am
Mark "The Terminator" Foster.
And I'm...
I'm...
It's okay, Mark,
we're your friends.
I'm Mark Foster.
I'm a video game addict.
[APPLAUDING]
Okay, Mark and I
are going to the mall.
Yeah, I'm looking
for a Halloween costume.
I'm thinking about
going as a computer nerd.
Good disguise.
Oh, poor baby, your cold's
really bad, isn't it?
Yes, it's the worst one
I've ever had in my life
and none of this medication
is helping.
I'm so miserable.
Well, just drink this tea
and take it easy, hmm?
-Bye-bye, honey.
-Bye, mom.
Get better.
[COUGHS]
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka...
[GRUNTING]
[GRUNTING]
[GRUNTING]
Cody, what's the problem?
Got another one of those
nasty fur balls?
[SCOFFS]
Ah, no, I just got
this humongous cold.
Well, why don't you
take some cold pills?
No way. My body's a temple.
[SCOFFS]
I don't put anything in it
that isn't completely healthy.
Except for the occasional
double king egg
chili cheese bacon burger.
[SIGHS]
[GRUNTING]
Cody...
before some lonely goose
gets the wrong idea
maybe you should go down
to the health food store.
There's all kinds of
natural remedies you could take.
Wow, great idea.
[LAUGHING] Yeah.
Doctor Dana Burger
comes through again.
I really owe you for this one.
I mean, anything you want
you just say the word.
I just want some
peace and quiet.
Peace and quiet.
Okay.
Hey, you guys,
kitchen's off limits!
Dana wants peace and quiet.
I'll just stay right here
and make sure nobody bothers ya.
[LAUGHS]
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
Download MyTotal.TV to watch your favorite TV
www.mytotal.tv THE BEST TV APP
[SCREAMING]
MAN:
♪ The dream got broken
♪ Seemed like all was lost
♪ What would be the future
♪ Could you pay the cost?
♪ You wonder
♪ Will there ever be
♪ A second time around?
WOMAN:
♪ Woah-a, woah-a
♪ When the tears are over
♪ And the moment has come
♪ Say "My Lord,
I think I found someone"
♪ And no one would be better
♪ To be putting it together
For the second time around
ALL:
♪ Step by step, day by day
WOMAN:
♪ Day by day
ALL:
♪ A fresh start over
♪ A different hand to play
♪ The deeper we fall
♪ The stronger we stay
MAN:
♪ It will be better
♪ The second time around
ALL:
♪ Step by Step, day by day
WOMAN:
♪ We'll make it better
MAN:
♪ Second time around ♪
Wait a minute, Frank.
Don't put the mustard in there.
Oh, honey,
I'm using your system.
I'm putting everything away
according to food groups,
and then, alphabetically
within the group.
Well, I know.
But, I've decided to rethink
my entire storage system.
Because, I think, if it's
just a little, too neurotic.
So, from now on, just...
put everything
in the shelves alphabetically,
and to heck
with the food groups.
-Hey, Carol.
-Hi.
Hey, dad, you know
how you're always telling me
to get more involved at school?
Well, today I signed up
for an after-school activity.
Alright, that's wonderful.
What are you doing?
I'm the crossbar monitor
at the girls' high jump pit.
So, your job is to sit there
and look up girls' shorts?
Pretty cool, huh, dad?
Oh, I'm truly proud.
I'm gonna go see if
Dana's camera has a macro zoom.
[LAUGHS]
This is the worst day
of my life.
Why? What happened?
I was completely humiliated
at school.
Oh, did Al stuff you
in your locker again?
Yeah,
but, that's not the problem.
I just got my math test back.
I'm slime.
Mark, you got an A,
what's wrong with that?
It's not an A plus.
See? No happy face.
Well, listen,
if that's what's bothering ya
I'll draw you a happy face
and a little duck too.
[LAUGHS]
You guys just don't understand.
I'm losing my edge.
If this keeps up,
I won't be the valedictorian
of the eighth grade.
This has gotta stop.
Is it just me or, is your son
wound a little tight?
Yeah, you're right,
he's so compulsive.
I don't know
how he got that way.
No, Frank,
the peaches don't go in there.
They go in
the L-M-N-O-P cabinet.
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
Om.
Om.
Om...
♪ On the range
♪ Where the deer and the...
DANA: Karen, come here,
you got to see this.
♪ Roam
♪ Boom shaka-laka-laka
♪ Boom shaka-laka-laka
♪ Boom shaka-laka-laka
boom shaka-laka-laka ♪
Uh, Cody?
[CHUCKLES] Hey, Karen.
You caught me at mid shaka-laka.
[LAUGHS]
-What are you doing?
-I'm curing my cold.
Hey, Dana, thanks for sending me
over to that health food store.
I got something that
totally changed my whole life.
Check this out.
"Healing your body
with your mind."
[LAUGHS] Yeah.
Everything I need
to stay healthy
is right up here
in the old casaba.
You bought this pamphlet
at the health food store?
No way, I bought it
in the parking lot
of the health food store.
It was totally spiritual, dude.
He was looking
for his shoes in the trash.
He said that I could use
the powers of my mind
to cure many of life's
every day ailments
like your common cold, your flu.
The heartbreak of psoriasis.
Cody, did it ever occur to you
that this guy
was just a nutcase?
[SCOFFS] All I know is this.
He did not have a cold.
Coincidence?
I think not.
Om.
Om.
♪ MacDonald had a farm
♪ E-I-E-I ♪
Om.
Oh, Frank, you're not trying
to get the Playboy channel
for free again, are you?
Now, why would I need
the Playboy channel
when I have you?
Alright, Frank, who is she?
Oh, I see.
-It's, uh, mood swing day.
-Oh, I'm sorry.
I guess I just had
a tough day at the beauty shop.
I mean, what do you do with
a bald woman who's in denial?
Anyway, what are you doing?
Well, you know,
I've been thinking about
how uptight Mark has been,
and I decided that he just needs
a little entertainment
in his life.
So, look,
I bought him this.
"Super Video Buster?"
Gee, I don't know, Frank.
You know, kids get so
caught up in these video games
they forget to do
their homework.
Honey, we're talking about Mark.
He wanted to know
if we are gonna spend
our next vacation
at the library of congress.
Can you believe
this encyclopedia
still calls the Apatosaurus
a brontosaurus?
Is there no pride in
species identification
anymore?
Mark, why don't you take
an itty-bitty break
from brain-land, huh?
And check this out.
Frank, I appreciate the offer
but, I'm just
not into video games.
Oh, come on, Mark.
Everybody's gotta kick back
every once in a while.
Why don't you
just give it a try?
Well, I have been curious about
this new 64-bit microprocessor.
"Motherboard Magazine"
gave it a rave review.
Well,
I got a lot of video games
but, I thought first we'd try
"Alien Warlords."
Oh, Frank,
that sounds awfully violent.
[LAUGHS] Yeah.
Wait till you see it.
Hmm, high resolution graphics.
Over a thousand pixels
per square inch.
Very impressive.
-Hey, I got one.
-Hey, hey, good shot.
-Oh, I got another.
-Ha.
Ha! I blew his
little alien head off.
Oh! Wait till you get
to level two.
When you shoot
the alien in the head
his eyeballs explode.
It's beautiful!
Hi, Daddy. Hi, Carol.
FRANK: Hey, pal,
how was school?
Great! We made
Billy Jenkins laugh so hard,
he blew chocolate milk
out of his nose.
Don't get any
better than that.
-Is Mark home?
-No, not yet.
Good. Now, maybe someone
else can get a turn on
Video Buster.
You know, Mark's been
playing with that thing
an awful lot this week,
I'm getting kind of
concerned.
Honey, give the kid a break.
He's just acting like a
normal child.
Hi, guys. Bye, guys.
Mark.
No time to talk, I've got
a date with level eight.
See? I told you,
he'd love that video game.
Hey, guys.
I had the best day
at school today.
Did you stuff Mark
in his locker again?
Well, yeah,
but, that's not the good part.
Mark got a D on his math test.
Mark got a D?
[CHUCKLES]
Yeah. Can you believe it?
Mr. Wizard crashed and burned.
I gotta go tell J.T.
Mark got a D?
Oh, thanks a lot, Frank.
Your stupid video games
are ruining my son.
Well, now, honey, just relax.
We'll go have a talk with Mark.
I'm sure there's
a logical explanation.
A video game does not
drastically alter
a kid like Mark.
Give me that joystick or, I'll
crush your head like a peanut.
Mark.
-Hey, hey, hey. Hey.
-Mark.
-Give me that cable.
-Mark.
-It's my game, I want it.
-Stop.
I want that joystick.
Give me that joystick.
I want that joystick,
give it here.
Stop.
I want it. I want it.
-Let me at him.
-Mark, would you stop it?
What is going on?
He was trying
to take the game from me.
Normally,
I'd just kick his butt.
But, I think he's possessed.
Brendan, we'd like
to speak to Mark alone, okay?
Okay, but, don't turn
your back on him.
Alright, Mark, sit down here.
What is wrong with you?
First, you're fighting
with Brendan, and what is this
I hear about you getting
a D on your math test?
Oh, is that out
on the street now?
From now on, there will be
no more video games
during the school week.
-None?
-None!
Your mother's right, Mark.
This is serious.
You're starting to act like...
one of my kids.
Gee! I had no idea.
[SIGHS]
Guess I kinda got
carried away, huh?
Yes, I guess so.
So, why don't you go upstairs
apologize to Brendan
and start your homework?
Good idea, mom.
Hey, Mark.
Do I still have to apologize?
[WHISPERING] Frank.
Frank.
-Frank!
-No, mommy, not the tap shoes.
Shh.
Listen...
[THUDDING]
-What is that?
-I don't know.
[THUDDING]
It's coming from downstairs.
Oh, my God.
Maybe it's a burglar.
Maybe he's strung out on drugs
and has a gun
and is ready to shoot
anything that moves.
Go check.
Oh, sure.
They want equal pay
but, I gotta take a bullet.
[SIGHS]
[SIGHS]
Frank, would you
just get downstairs?
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
-Go, go, go. Go.
-Okay, okay.
Mark?
What are you doing?
Trying to get to level ten.
It's 3 o'clock in the morning.
Good, then it
gives me four hours
until I gotta go to school.
Four and a half
if I go in my pajamas.
Mark, you turn that thing off
right now.
No way, I'm just about to win.
Mark, give me that.
Mark, you are out of control.
No, I'm not out of control.
You can't be
a master of the universe
if you're out of control.
Frank, plug that back in.
Okay, Captain Kirk.
-Hey! Hey!
-I'm beaming you back upstairs.
-Put me down.
-Don't force me to use
the Vulcan death grip.
MARK: Frank, I'm warning you.
I've read several books
on karate.
Hiyah! Yi-yah-yah!
[CLINKING]
[CLINKING]
Do you have to do that?
-Is it bothering you?
-Yes.
Then I have to do it.
Hey, hey.
Boy, nothing works up
your appetite
like a nice big day
of recreational welding.
Cody, what is that?
Oh, it's an ashtray.
You don't smoke.
Okay, then it's a paperweight.
[LAUGHS]
You don't have a desk.
Then it's a '57 Chevy.
Who cares? It looks cool.
Guys, I'm in big trouble.
Look!
Whoa, a hickey.
[LAUGHS]
Mark of the "Love Jones."
[CODY LAUGHS]
Actually,
it's the mark of Steve Jones.
Whoa, that is some hickey.
What did you do?
Drag him around school all day?
This isn't funny, Dana.
If mom sees this,
she'll kill me.
What am I gonna do?
Here's a thought.
Don't let guys
suck on your neck.
You know, Karen,
swapping monkey bites
is no way to say "I love you."
But, there's no use crying over
spilled blood
So, the Codeman, with his powers
of psychic healing
is gonna help you
in your time of need.
Cody, you're not
gonna do one of your
"Hocus-Pocus, Let's All Focus"
numbers, are you?
Scoff if you will, non-believer.
But, I had a major cold.
I took no medication.
I just got plenty of rest
drank lots of fluid and used
only the powers of my mind.
And now a mere
seven to ten days later...
[SNAPS FINGERS] I am cured.
I'll try anything.
Go ahead, Cody, heal me.
Okay.
[EXHALES]
Hickey, hickey.
Heal hickey, heal hickey.
Hickey, hickey heal.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka. Boom.
Well?
Boy, that sucker
must go straight to the bone.
[LAUGHS]
This calls for
emergency medical procedure
Free association.
Okay.
Hickey.
Ricky.
Ricky Nelson.
Ozzy Nelson.
Paul Nelson.
"Full House."
[GASPS] Little Michelle.
[LAUGHS]
[EXHALES]
Seashell.
Turtle shell.
Turtleneck.
[GASPS] Dude, that's it.
-What's it?
-Turtleneck.
Wear a turtleneck
till your hickey goes away.
[LAUGHS]
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, Cody, you're amazing.
[LAUGHS]
Alright.
Yeah.
Guess between the known
and the unknown,
lies the Codeman.
Now I know why "Hee Haw"
ran for 21 years.
I don't know
why you brought me here.
This is a complete
waste of time.
Oh, face it, Mark
you're addicted
to that video game
and we have to do
something about it.
Hi, you must be the Lamberts.
I'm Ed Wheeler.
Welcome
to Video Addicts Anonymous.
Hi, I'm Carol,
and this is my husband, Frank.
And this is
our little addict, Mark.
Nice to meet you, Mark.
You know,
this is a support group
to help people who are
video game addicts.
And I'm sure you do
terrific work.
But, the truth is, Ed..
May I call you Ed?
Sure.
I'm not a video game addict.
In fact, I've never even
played one until last week.
Well, he's right about that.
In fact, he wouldn't have
played one at all
if Frank hadn't brought
one home
to help him relax.
What are you saying?
Now this is all my fault, huh?
Well, you are the one
who got him hooked.
FRANK: Honey, I was just
trying to help him out.
I mean, he's got a mother who
alphabetizes canned goods, huh?
No wonder he's so compulsive.
Oh, so now it's my fault.
Well, honey, I'm telling you--
Ah, folks, folks.
We're here to help Mark.
But, there is a group
for troubled marriages
down the hall.
Oh! No, no, no, no.
We have a very healthy marriage.
There's just
this one little issue
which will be solved as soon as
my husband admits
that I am right.
[CHUCKLES]
We'll be down the hall.
Everything's gonna be okay.
You be a brave little boy
for mommy
and just remember
how much mommy loves you.
I love you so much, and this is
gonna be great for you, honey.
Is there any wonder I still
sleep with a night light?
Okay, everybody,
let's get started.
I'd like to introduce
a newcomer to the group.
Everyone, this is Mark.
ALL: Hi, Mark.
Hello. Friendly bunch.
Alright, who'd like to be
the first to share tonight?
Yes.
Hi, My name's Scott.
I'm a video game addict.
ALL: Hi, Scott.
It's been about three days
since I've...
You know...
played a video game.
[APPLAUDING]
It's been tough,
it's been real tough.
But, the good news is
I'm starting to get used to
the sunlight again.
[APPLAUDING]
So, Mark, would you
like to share a little
about your problem?
What problem?
I don't have a problem.
Mark, anything you say here
is confidential.
All we wanna do is help.
Listen, Ed, I don't
wanna seem ungrateful
but, I just don't need your help
because I don't have a problem.
Sounds like you're
in denial, Mark.
That's the first sign
of a video addict.
I am not in denial.
Oh, anger.
That's the second sign.
Listen, red...
I am not in denial,
I am not a video game addict,
and I am not angry.
You know, maybe Mark's right.
Maybe he's not addicted
to video games.
By the way, Mark, how's school?
Still getting straight As?
Well, there's been
a little setback, but, so what?
What about fights?
Been in any fights lately, Mark?
One slight altercation.
But, he deserved it.
How are you sleeping?
Sleeping?
Yeah, hard to turn
that game off and go to bed?
It's none of your business.
Do you always have to get
to the next level?
Leave me alone.
Is it tough to go to sleep
if you haven't got
the highest score?
But, I always have
the highest score!
I always get to the next level.
I'm the best.
I am
Mark "The Terminator" Foster.
And I'm...
I'm...
It's okay, Mark,
we're your friends.
I'm Mark Foster.
I'm a video game addict.
[APPLAUDING]
Okay, Mark and I
are going to the mall.
Yeah, I'm looking
for a Halloween costume.
I'm thinking about
going as a computer nerd.
Good disguise.
Oh, poor baby, your cold's
really bad, isn't it?
Yes, it's the worst one
I've ever had in my life
and none of this medication
is helping.
I'm so miserable.
Well, just drink this tea
and take it easy, hmm?
-Bye-bye, honey.
-Bye, mom.
Get better.
[COUGHS]
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka-laka-laka.
Boom shaka...