Starsky and Hutch (1975–1979): Season 4, Episode 9 - Black and Blue - full transcript

Hutch is wounded by a teenage thief, Starsky dubiously goes to work with his new partner, black and beautiful Inspector Joan Meredith.







Pick a color.


A color. I'm checking
my ESP quotient.

I'm testing here. Pick a color.

Oh, come on, Starsky.

After 12 hours of shuffling
paper in that office,

give me a break, will you?

A color. What's the big deal?

All right, blue.

How's that for a color?
Blue. Is that good?

That's what I thought
you'd say. Sure you did.

Pick a number. Oh,
come on, Starsky. I'm tired.

I don't wanna play this game.

You're driving me home.

You got nothing else
to do. Pick a number.

Okay, I got a
number. What is it?

No, no, no, no.

This time you're gonna tell me.

Okay, I'm getting a... seven.

A what? A seven.

That's it.

Okay. Man, am I qualified.

You're qualified to do
nothing but commit yourself.

"If you get 60 percent or
more correct on this test,

you're qualified to join our
advanced class in ESP."

That's extra-sensory
perception. No kidding.

"One hundred percent
of our advanced students

"have used this ancient wisdom

"in the stock market, Las Vegas

and in relationships
with the opposite sex."

Well, you need all the
help you can get, pal.



[WHISPERS] Get me the police.

I got blue and seven.
I'm batting one thousand.

I may be some kind of
mystic without even knowing it.

I'm sure you are.

RADIO]: All units, all units,

a 211 in progress
at 10543 Cruger.

Did you get that, O
blue-seven mystic?

We're four blocks away.

This is Blue Seven.

This is Zebra
Three, Zebra Three.

We're following on that
211 at 10543 Cruger.



Hold it. Police.





She was a kid, just a kid.

She's a kid.




Did you get her? No.

Starsky, she was just a kid.

I couldn't pull the trigger.

Couldn't pull the trigger.


Clear it, please.

No sweat, you're
gonna be home free.

HUTCH: That's
just your ESP talkin'.

I was batting a thousand.

No, you're not.

I only said seven to
make you feel better.

I was thinking of two.

Here we go.

Oh, oh, wait out here. Oh,
no, you don't understand.

I'm a cop. He's my partner.
Then guard the hallway.

Dr. Richfield, call your office.

Dr. Richfield, call your office.



[SIGHING] Well, my
partner's been shot. I, uh...

Standing won't
make him better. Sit.


He'll be all right.


Hey, Viv, where you been?

Hey, we've been workin' hard,

and you outside gallivantin'.

Hey, Viv.


Where's Bruce?


The man showed
up like a bad dream.

Took me some to shake him.

How'd you do it?

I did it.

Well, how you know
you weren't followed?

The pigs are looki"
for a stolen '74 Cad,

driven by some 17-year-old.

Not a pigtailed pickaninny

ridin' a bus,

carryin' a ratty
valise. [CHUCKLES]


You got heart.

And you brought home all
the goodies. [CHUCKLES]

You know, you all right, babe.

You wanna go out for a taste?

Oh, I would, but, um,

you underage. [CHUCKLES]




Here, drink.

Oh, good.

I could use some coffee.

What are you talking, coffee?

It's bad for the bones.


Look, are you married?

[CHUCKLING] Is that a proposal?

Well, I don't make much money,

and I keep
irregular hours, but...

The important thing is,
are you a good dancer?

I think I'm in love.

Mrs. Greene, we're
ready for you now.

First door on your right.

Listen to him. "First
door on the right."

As though I've been waiting here

to go to the last
door down the hall.

Doctors. WOMAN
[OVER PA]: Dr. Redfelt,

report to Dr. Garr
in Administration.

He'll be all right, your friend.

I promise.




What's the matter with her?

Are you a relative?

No, a cop.

Terminal cancer.


Does she know that?


Excuse me.

Anything yet?

Terminal cancer.


She acts like
everything's light and love.

I'm inquirin' about Hutchinson.

No, nothin'.

Did you find out anything
from that kid I busted?

What do you think?

NURSE: Hey, you, the cop.


Listen, I'm not
supposed to tell you this.

Oh, boy, you look
terrible. What's the matter?

Hey, listen, your
buddy's gonna make it.

He's all right.

Now, go home.

How soon can we see him?

Oh, is he a cop too?


Well, he's in Recovery.

Before anybody
gets ready to see him,

it's 15, 20 hours.

Can we get him a message?

No, he's too dopey now.

Listen, I can't mess.
I gotta get to OB.




So he's all right, your friend?


I told you.

Go home now...

and stay away from that coffee.


Those young boys, they
can't stay away from me.

What can I tell you?


Yeah, uh, let me speak
to, uh, Kenneth Hutchinson.

He's a new patient there.



Yeah, uh, well, um,
uh, what floor is he on?

Well, look, let me speak
to the nurses' station

on that floor, okay?

Thank you.

Yeah, I'd like to speak
to Kenneth Hutchinson.

He's a new patient who
was operated on today.

This is Dave Starsky. I'm...

No, I'm...

Well, uh, look, uh,
I was told if I c...

Look, uh, ahem,
excuse me, ma'am.

Do you mind if I speak
to the doctor in charge?

He's not...

Yeah, uh, well, c...

Well, when can I speak to him?


Well, look... Look, wait, wait,

are you sure he's
gonna be okay, huh?

No complications?

No, I don't... Don't
trust doctors. No...


Okay, I appreciate it.

Thank you, ma'am.

Hutch? Yeah.

[SIGHING] Doctor
said he's gonna be okay.


He can't be seen
till this afternoon.

Where you goin'?

Oh, I got a kid in interrogation
I wanna ask a few questions.

Ahem. First I got somebody
I want you to meet.

Come on, captain,

no time for social

Look, this is strictly
departmental business.

It's your new partner.

STARSKY: What are you talking
about? The body's not even cold.

Uh, this particular case
requires special assistance.

Now, your new partner
can be particularly helpful

in this case.

Do I have a choice?

Sure you do.

Like always.


DOBEY: Inspector
First Grade Starsky...

Inspector Second Grade Meredith.

Meredith's been
briefed on the case.

That must've taken
all of five minutes.


Let's go,


You running a race?
Take bigger steps.

Listen, whatever's
wrong with you, man,

I had nothing to do with it.

Look, lady... No, no, no.

Detective Second Grade Meredith.

My partner's been shot.

Bullet missed his heart by
this much. My partner, Hutch,

he's closer to me
than my brother.

I hear you. Okay.

So don't ask me to open my arms

to some new social
experiment in police procedure

called Second
Inspec... Detective.

Starsky, the only
thing I expect from you

is that you breathe in and out

and let me do the
job I was assigned to.

Time to question the kid.

Who's going to play the heavy?

You're kidding. Try me.

You got cigarettes in that bag?

That is part of the
game plan, isn't it?


Turn around, punk.

How you doing, kid?


Oh, boy.

[SIGHS] You want a cigarette?


Meredith, give me a pack.

Come on.

Who's gonna pay for it?

She'd charge her mother.

I will, okay?


They treating you okay? Okay.

That's good. Wouldn't want
you to get hurt, would we?


Speak for yourself, Starsky.

What are you gonna do?

Women's lib lets loose
some dangerous people.

What's your name? Bruce?

[SCOFFS] Yeah.


Look, I just want you to know

what you're up against.

It's, uh, not only
a grand theft auto.

It's also attempted
murder of a police officer.

Look, I didn't shoot nobody.

Well, I know that.

But your partner did.

Now, what's her name again?

Barbra Streisand.

Don't get cute, punk.
Lighten up, baby...

Now, we want her name

and where she fenced
the goods. [DOOR OPENS]

Batson, take him up
to Property. What?

Yeah, tell me about it,



Who put up his bail?

His guardian, right?

How'd you know that?

I used to work Juvenile.

Happens all the time.


That's just what I need,

an expert on kids.


Better catch up
with your partner...



Look, Starsky, I remind you,

I did not ask for
this assignment.

I guess I'm just lucky.

It's called quota time.

Come again?

You read the papers,
watch the news.

Pressure's on the department
to hire more minorities,

to hire more women.

So I'm a veritable find.

In this one beautiful
black person,

I fill two quotas. Great.

Why don't you sit
closer to the window

so everybody can see you?

And the fact that black kids

are involved in this

makes me specially qualified.

So get off my back, Starsky,

'cause I don't like it
any better than you do.

It's not a question of "like."

I'm worried about
my beautiful body.

I ain't after it, honey.

Very funny.

You see the size
of that kid Bruce?

I barely got him down.

If two of those kids
jump me in an alley,

what's a 110-pound
woman gonna do

to protect my fragile features?

Pull over.


Pull over, I said.

Get out.

Hutch is never
gonna believe this.

Come at me any way you want.

Meredith, you've seen
too many kung fu movies.

That's not the way it
works. Damn it, try me.

Lady, I wouldn't wanna hurt you.


Ah! Let me go, or
I'll bust your ribs.

Say please, or I'm gonna
break your vertebrae.

[GRUNTS] Please.


Now, if you say pretty please,

I just might get you
transferred to Juvenile,

and you can play
with the kiddies.

Now, if you were
one of those punks,

you'd get up real easy now.



You gave Starsky a w...? A what?

A woman.


He's gonna love you
for... Love you for that.

She graduated fourth in
her class at the academy.

Got any lead on,
uh, who shot me?

Not yet.

That's five daytime
robberies in four weeks.

They always seem
to get away clean.

Yeah, except in this case.

You know, how come nobody's
ever home when they hit?

Five times. It
figures, you know?

Well, all five
families were away.

Two days to two weeks.

Vacations, business.

All in the same neighborhood?


All over the city.

You know, if you were running

a rip-off operation

like this one...

how would you find out
the people were away?

There'd be mail piling up.

There'd be, uh,
newspapers on the porch.

It'll be, uh, milk bottles.

We already checked all that.

The neighbors made
sure that didn't happen.

Well, we find out
how they do it, captain,

and we've got home base.


all you have to do is get well.

Leave those kids to us.

Captain, those kids
almost killed me.


Thank you. I'll tell him.

Okay. Okay.


Oh, hello, Mr. Blossom.

Oh, how marvelous.

For a week.


Yes, we'll hold
all the messages.

give Mexico my regards.


Who has BT down, hold the mayo?

That's my lunch. Ugh.

I'm starving.

Cover for me a minute, will you?

ELAINE: Allied
Answering Service.

Hi, how are you?

Go to the beach?


Just in time.

How much is that?

Three even.

Have change for a 5?

Sure do.


Have a good day.

I will now.



Well, well, well.

My man Starsky

Beauty and the beast.

In case you're wondering,

you ain't the beauty.

For a man who looks
like an Egyptian horse,

I'd say your house
is made of glass.

Are you gonna continue
with this tacky diatribe,

or are you gonna introduce
me to my next wife?

I wish you both luck.


this is Meredith.


She's a cop.

Meredith, I'll forgive
you your bad taste.

How are you doing?

[CHUCKLING] Okay. You?

[INHALES] Better now.

I hope you don't mind beer.

That's all he'll
go for. That's fine.

Well, are you gonna tell me

you just dropped by for a taste?

It would be a lie.

Ain't that the truth?

What's on your mind?

Can you get us a connect
to some hot goods?


Does an astronaut get high

when he goes high?

Are there grits in the ghetto?

Oh, good Lord.

She laughs at my jokes too.

Listen, when you
quit the force...

you and I could have

a great deal of potential,

not to mention the future.

Business before pleasure.

You've been hangin' out

with what's-his-name too long.

Can you get a
color television set

or a record player
hot off the streets?

Name the brand,
put in the order.

Do it.

Hey, wait a minute.

I'll help you guys when
somebody gets burned.

But I'm not gonna help
you bust every dude

in the neighborhood

who's rippin' off appliances.

No offense. Street ethics.

I need the fence.

Hutch almost got killed.

He's in the hospital.

I didn't know.

It's not public knowledge.

Well, how's he doin'?

He's gonna be okay.

Good chance of nailin'
the dude who shot him,

with your help.

We think it's an organization
that's exploitin' kids.

Black teenagers
losin' their future

before they've
even got a chance.


I can say no to his ugly face,

but you are very dangerous.

I like your hat.



STARSKY: Another robbery
reported three hours ago.

Mm. Anything?

Got away clean.

Well, that figures.

You really have it
rough, don't you?


Well, think of it this way.

Another six inches and it
might have been all over.


You must be grateful
for six inches, eh?

NURSE: Would you
like some after-shave?

Sure, anything. Anything...
Anything from your hands.


Now, you remember, if
you need anything else,

you call me, all right? Mm-hm.

You promise? Mm.

I promise solemnly. Solemnly.

Okay. Promise.

[CHUCKLES] Bye-bye.



Wipe your mouth.


Well, um... [CLEARS THROAT]


Speaking of partners,
how's your beautiful new one?

Tell you one thing.
She smells better

than your after-shave lotion.


You wanna catch the phone there?

My arm.

Hutchinson manor.

Is this you, Starsk?


How's Hutchie doin'?

Better than me.
What's happenin'?

Well, if you get a chance,
you should drop by about 4.

I'm gettin' a new color
television delivered.

Thanks, man.

And don't thank
me, just pay the bill.

Hey, and tell Hutch I got
a cold brew waitin' for him.

Will do.

What's happening?
They're startin' to move.

No time to tell you
about it. See you later.

Wait a minute, partner.

Least you could
do is to fill me in.

My partner's filled in plenty.

So how's your friend?

Much better.

Sure. I told you.

How are you doin'?

They got me in a wheelchair now.

I'm sorry.

You should live a life
as rich as God gave me.

And besides,

I hear it's not so
bad on the other side.

Go. Go save the world.

I gave already.



are you so salty about?

I never should've let you
talk me into taking this car.

There's no connect
to headquarters.

If I chase those kids,

what are we gonna
do in this thing?

Man, do you think
your red tomato

driven by some white-faced dude

won't stick out in the
ghetto like some...?

Some what?

Some red tomato driven
by some white-faced dude.

Listen, Meredith.

Write me a letter, Starsky.
They just completed delivery

and if we're lucky, they might
be headed back to the supplier.


No, no, Vivian
didn't tell me that.

Hey, man, I'm telling you.
She blew away the man.

Where did she get the piece?

The place we ripped off.

Thanks, Bruce.

Think we should call for a
backup and clean house?

And maybe get a bunch of
kids and not the headman? No.

I wanna make sure that the man

who sent those
kids out in the street

is there when we make our move.

There's no way to tell that

unless you're Superman
and have x-ray vision.


How old are you?


What does that have to do...?

How young can you look?

Are you talkin' about
me going undercover

as one of those kids?

Well, I'd do it except my
blue eyes would give me away.

you and Sinatra.

Are you ordering
me to go undercover?


We both know what
happened to Hutch.

This ain't no ice skate.

I wanna think on it.


If you decide not to do it...

it ain't nobody's
business but us chickens.


You burned a cop?

I told you, if you
ever get busted,

just go on down for the count.

I would've had you
out in 20 minutes.

Look at Bruce.

But no. No.

You got to go play
female gangster.

What are you standing there for?

What are you standing there for?
You ain't no good to me no more.

You blown it.


Look, I don't wanna see your
face around here no more.

Get out of here,
girl. Get out of here.




Fella, we're gonna
have to get you a lady.


Lady, I don't know what you
heard about me on the street,

but, uh, I'm
definitely not into kids.

Hey, how old do I look, mister?

Well, I'd say, uh,

young enough to infiltrate.

You got it.

And in order for me to do
it I need your color TV set.

Huh. 'Cause mine
is on the blink.

Where is it?

In the bedroom.



Not tonight.


There's a great special on.

Oh, yeah?



You know, Train always
leaves for appointments

around this time of day.

When he's out, we're in.

You know me, I'm
down with the get-down.

BOTH: We're gonna
rip off the rip-off artist.



Now, don't get brave.

Don't get paternal
on me just because...

Because what?

Because we, uh, watched
a TV special together.

Look, lady,

people who don't
get scared scare me.

Would it make
you feel any better

if I told you I was
scared to death?

It'll keep you from
making mistakes.

Now, you go into that house.

If you're not out
in 30 minutes...





What's that white dude
doin' in our neighborhood?

Can you handle it?

I better, 'cause you
can't exactly follow me

to the front door, now,
can you, old blue eyes?

That sucker's the man.

What are you doin'
with that piece?

We'll take him.

Say what?

He's settin' up Train.

We bring him in. We
save the operation.

He's gotta give
us some big bucks.

Are you crazy, girl?

What are you,
some kind of sissy?

Yeah, honey,

and this sissy gonna be
layin' lilies on top of your grave.

Hey, consider me gone.

TRAIN: How'd you
know to bring it here?

What do you expect me to do,
man, huh? Take it to Goodwill?

[SCOFFS] I ain't donatin'.

I want some bread.

Well, who told you I'm buyin'?

Aw, man, there ain't no
secrets in the streets now.

Now, are you gonna go for it,

or do I have to take it
over to the white side?

'Cause they're payin'
green just like you.

How old are you, girl?

Old enough to know better...
and young enough to do it all.




We'll work something out.


If you sigh, you die, pig.


Just pull out your
piece real easy-like

and put it in the back.

Hey, man,

I already burned one cop,

so two don't make no difference
between the fire and the pan.


Do it now.


Now, get out.

How old are you, kid?

Big enough to pull
a trigger. Move.


The cop you shot
isn't dead, kid.

Yeah, and my mama's Diana Ross.

Shut up and walk.

Fifteen, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20.

Twenty bucks? That number
costs 359 in the stores.

Well, take it back to the
store if you don't like my price.

Hey, man, you
are rippin' me off,

and I ain't goin' for it.


You got me.

You know, you're something else.

Uh, tell you what.

I'll give you another 10.

VIVIAN: Train, she's a cop.

Unh. Go for it, Train.

Just turn it loose, kid.

You must be crazy.

Do it.

What are you
gonna do, shoot him?


You're a cop. You
don't shoot people cold.

But I tell you
what I'm gonna do.

If you don't turn him loose,

I'm gonna waste
pasty-face over here.

If you check me out any longer,

your buddy's dead.


And you were worried about me?


I'd like to speak to
Ken Hutchinson, please.

He's a police detective.

Well, how would I
know what room he's in?

It's your hospital, isn't it?

Thank you.




Hutchinson, this is Dobey.

Is Starsky there?
No, he's not around.

Meredith and he haven't
been heard from since morning.

Oh, they didn't report in?

Didn't I just say that?

Well, um... maybe they're
over at his place or something.

Why don't you check?

Who do you think you're
talking to, some punk rookie?

You know, this call to you
was absolutely unnecessary.


TRAIN: Come on,
everybody, move that stuff.

Put that camera down. Bruce,
get them to work. Come on, now.

Let's move. Let's relocate
before the holidays. Move it!

Train, what are we
gonna do with them?

What do you think?

TRAIN: Come on, now.

Bruce, get 'em out there, man.

DOBEY: No, no, no,
no, no. Forget about that.

The Torino's at Starsky's house.

Just put the APB
out on Meredith's car.

If I knew that, you'd be the
captain, and I'd be the clerk.

Look it up, Henderson.

Who let you out? Me.

Are you supposed to
be out of the hospital?

Any word on Starsky?

Are you supposed to be out?

I'm out. You got
the file on the case?


All right, maybe this
will tell us something.



Mr. Blossom's line.

Yeah, is he in?

No, I'm sorry. He isn't.

May I take a message?

Who's this?

Allied Answering Service.

May I take a message
for Mr. Blossom?

Uh, no, thank
you. I'll call back.



What are you doin'?

I think I just figured out

how those kids knew
no one was home.

How's that?



Yeah, hello. This is
Detective Sergeant Hutchinson

at police headquarters.

Do you have an
answering service?

Oh, well, yes, we do.

Have you recovered our
property? What's the name?

Allied Answering Service.

Thank you very much.
We'll get back to you.

That's it, that's it.

Mind telling me what's going on?

I'll tell you on the way.


HUTCH: When you go
away for any length of time,

you call your
answering service, right?


I'm sorry, sir. No
one's permitted...

Police officers.
Who's in charge here?

Oh, Mary.

Mary, huh? I see.
Well, Mary, uh...

Anyone else work here?

Oh, just us two.

We split the shifts and
overlap for two hours.

HUTCH: Oh, well, that
makes it very simple, then,

because one of you is involved
in a very dangerous game

that almost killed me.

And almost killing a cop

is almost as bad as
anything you can think of.

BUZZES] This is Elaine.

Please hold on.

Look, I... I don't know

what you're talkin' about.

Mary, what are they
talkin' about? Look, mister...


Officer, I...

I... I... I work here to take
care of me and my daughter.

And my ex-bum of a husband
doesn't send me enough

to keep me in Twinkies.

And I don't know
what's going on.

This is Elaine. Elaine.
Please hold on. Uh...

But if there's trouble... Mary,

you better not get me
in trouble. I can't afford it.

Really, I can't.

This is Elaine. Please hold on.

How 'bout it, Mary?
You wanna cooperate?

You may save an officer's life.

If not, your life won't
be worth saving.



Let's just leave
'em here, Train.

I mean, before anybody find
two cops in this neighborhood,

they'll starve to death.

No. Waste them.

It don't feel right.

TRAIN: Why not? You
already blew one away.

Yeah, but that was
in self-defense, man.

TRAIN: Now, look. Now, you
created this whole situation

in the first place.

It's called karma, honey.
Now, you burn that man.

But that's cold, Train.

Well, it's a cold world, girl.

I understand how
you feel, Vivian.

Don't listen to him.

You understand
what, Mr. White-Cop?

Now, you live in some fancy pad

with fancy cars
and fancy clothes.

Vivian and the kids
livin' down here...

amongst the things
that we ripped off

from people just like you.

You don't understand
what we eat for lunch.

You gonna burn me, too, Vivian?

You blow us away, and you
blow every chance you got.

future is now, girl.

Don't blow it.



You know, all you
cops sound the same.

You may be black, lady,
but your uniform's blue.


TRAIN: Waste them.
STARSKY: Killin' us

ain't gonna do you any good.


but it might make me
feel a whole lot better.

Okay, okay. Let me just
have my last words, huh?

I mean, even blue eyes here

should have a chance
to say something

before this thing's over.

Now, you burn him.

HUTCH: Freeze.


Who let you out?

Well, we figured you
might need some help.

Well, we were doin' all right.


You okay?

Yeah, I'm okay. You okay?

I'm okay.

You okay, partner?

[SIGHS] I'm fine.

Yeah, you are. [CHUCKLES]



DOBEY: The kid is still a minor.

They'll probably
send her to a home.

They can't find any guardian.

I think Lionel the
Train filled that bill.

Plans are for him to spend
a little time in the joint.

All right. You did a good job.

Now, get out of here
so I can finish my work.




Hey, yourself.

Next time my
partner gets shot...

I'm gonna request
you personally.

Do that.


Uh, thanks a lot,
guys. Thank you.

You can ignore him.

You're a good cop.

You're not so bad yourself.


See you.

Might be nice.


You don't mind if we
leave the room, do you?

DOBEY: You speak for yourself.

This is my office,
and I wanna watch.

What are you gonna do?