Star Trek (1966–1969): Season 1, Episode 17 - The Squire of Gothos - full transcript

When Kirk and Sulu vanish into thin air from the bridge of the Enterprise, Spock sends a landing party to the planet below to locate them. What they find is an 18th century castle and a rather foppish man, Trelane, who seems to know a great deal about the Earth - even if it is the wrong time period. If truth be told, Trelane acts like a spoiled little boy and it's obvious Kirk and the others have become his playthings. They soon realize that if they are to overcome Trelane and free themselves, they must locate and destroy his power source.

All clear ahead, Captain.

The sensors indicate zero register.

Forward readings, Mr. Spock.

Gravimetric reading--

no significant change,

zero space density.

Ahead warp factor 3, Mr. Sulu.

Colony Beta 6
wants their supplies.

We'll get across this void
in a hurry.

Void,

stardust--



The word conjures up
pictures of dunes,

oases, mirages.

Sunlight, palm trees.

We're 900 light-years
from that kind of desert.

The precise meaning
of the word desert

is a waterless,
barren wasteland.

I fail to understand
your romantic nostalgia

for such a place.

It doesn't surprise me,
Mr. Spock.

I can't imagine
a mirage ever disturbing

those mathematically perfect

brain waves of yours.

Thank you, Dr. McCoy.

Moving on schedule



into quadrant 904.

Beta 6...

is eight days distant.

Something, Mr. Spock?

Unusual, Captain.

I'm now getting a sizable

space displacement reading.

- Can you verify that, Navigator?
- No, sir.

Forward sweeps are negative.
Wait. Verified, sir.

We must be in some sort of light warp
or we would have picked it up earlier.

Put it on visual.

Iron silica body,
planet size--

magnitude 1-E.

We'll be passing close.

Inconceivable this body
has gone unnoted on our records.

And yet, here it is.

No time to investigate.

Science stations,

gather data for computer banks.

Uhura, notify the Discovery

on subspace radio.

A strong interference
on subspace, Captain.

The planet must be
a natural radio source.

Let's get out of its range.

Veer 40 degrees
to starboard, Mr. Sulu.

40 degrees.

Sulu!

Mr. Spock, they're gone!

Emergency!

Full reverse power!

Space--

the final frontier.

These are the voyages

of the starship Enterprise.

Its five-year mission--

to explore strange new worlds...

to seek out new life
and new civilizations...

to boldly go

where no man has gone before.

Ship 's log-- Stardate 2124.5.

First Officer Spock

reporting for Captain James Kirk.

We are orbiting the lone
unrecorded planet

in the star desert.

For four hours,

we have made every possible
instrument sweep,

but Captain Kirk
and Helmsman Sulu

remain unaccounted for.

I have placed the ship
on red alert.

We've searched again
from stem to stern.

If they're not down on that planet,
they're now here.

No sign of human life
on the surface, sir,

unless the instruments
aren't functioning.

Function is normal.

Continue sensor sweeps.

Lieutenant Uhura,

have you checked all wave bands?

All of them. No response.

With due respect, sir,

request permission

to transport to the surface

and carry out search.

I second DeSalle's request.

What are we waiting for?

The decision will be mine, Doctor.

I have the responsibility
for your safety.

Mr.Jaeger,

describe
your geophysical findings

for the surface below.

No detectable soil or vegetation,

extremely hot, toxic atmosphere

swept by tornadic storms,

continuous volcanic eruptions,

deadly to any life-forms
such as we know it

without oxygen
and life-support systems.

Estimate survival time

of two unprotected
individuals down there.

Not very long.

Mr. Spock...

Iook.

"Greetings...

and felicitations."

Hmm.

Send this, Lieutenant.

U.S.S. Enterprise

to signaler on planet surface.

Identify self.

[ Beeping ]

"Hip-hip...

hoorah"?

And I believe it's pronounced...

tallyho.

Some kind of a joke, sir?

I'll entertain any theories,
Mr. DeSalle.

Any at all.

One thing is certain.

Obviously there's life
on that planet.

You're quite correct, Doctor.

Prepare transporter room.

Request assignment
to the search party, sir.

No, Mr. Scott.

Neither you nor I
can be spared here.

Mr. DeSalle,
equip the landing party

with full communications, armament,
and life-support gear.

Mr.Jaeger,
your geophysical knowledge

may be crucial down there.

Dr. McCoy will accompany.

If those peculiar signals

are coming from Captain Kirk

or Lieutenant Sulu,

their rationality is in question.

Dismissed.

[ Uhura ]
No more messages from below, sir,

but I've locked onto
their original source.

Very good.

Transmit coordinates
to Mr. Scott.

Once on the planet's surface,

you'll establish contact
with us immediately.

Use the laser beacon
if necessary.

Ready, Scott?

Ready, Mr. Spock.

Activate.

Where are your storms,Jaeger?

Atmosphere...

exactly the same as ours.

[ Communicator Beeps ]

DeSalle to Enterprise.

DeSalle to Enterprise.

It doesn't function.

We're cut off.

[ Communicator Beeps ]

No response.

Keep trying with yours.

[ Beacon Whistles ]

Something's blocking the beacon.

Got to find open ground.

Jaeger!

McCoy!

In the name of heaven,

where are we?

Look.

[ Tricorder Sounds ]

There's no reading.

They're like waxworks figures.

[ Harpsichord Plays ]

I must say,

they make a perfectly exquisite

display pair,

but I suppose
you want them back now.

Where are we?

Welcome to an island of peace

on my stormy little planet
of Gothos.

What happened? Fill me in.

You disappeared
from the bridge after Sulu.

We've been looking for you
for four hours.

You must excuse my whimsical way

of fetching you here,

but when I saw you passing by,

I simply could not resist.

I'm Captain James Kirk

of the United Starship
Enterprise.

Ah, so you're the captain
of these brave lads.

My greetings and felicitations,
Captain.

So good ofyou
and your officers to, uh...

drop in.

Absolutely smashing.

Who are you?
Where do you come from?

General Trelane,

retired.

At your service, sirs.

My home is your home.

We've lost contact
with the ship, Captain.

We're trapped here.

I can't tell you
how delighted I am

to have visitors
from the very planet

that I've made my hobby.

Yes, but according
to my observations,

I didn't think you capable

of such voyages.

Notice the period, Captain.

900 light-years from Earth.

It's what might be seen

through a viewing scope

if it were powerful enough.

Ah, yes.

I've been looking in

on the doings on your
lively little Earth.

Then you've been looking in
on the doings

900 years past.

Oh, really?

Have I made an error in time?

How fallible of me.

Oh, I did so want
to make you feel at home.

I'm quite proud ofthe detail.

General Trelane--

Retired, sir.

Just Squire Trelane now.

And you may call me squire.

Yes, I rather fancy that.

For what purpose...

have you imprisoned us here?

Imprisoned?

Nonsense.

You're my guests.

You see,
I just finished my studies

of your curious
and fascinating society.

You came by at the most
propitious moment.

I want to know
all about your campaigns,

your battles,
your missions of conquest.

Our missions are peaceful,
not for conquest.

When we do battle,

it's because we have no choice.

That's the official story, eh?

I must ask you
to let us go back.

I wouldn't hear of it.

You shall join me
in a repast.

I want to learn
all about your feelings

on war, killing, and conquest.

Do you know

that you're one of
the few predator species

that preys even on itself?

Not yet.

Put it on stun,

not to kill, DeSalle.

DeSalle, did you say?

Un vrai Francais?

My ancestry is French, yes.

Ah, monsieur.

Vive la gloire.

Vive Napoleon.

You know, I admire
your Napoleon very much.

This is Mr. DeSalle,

our navigator...

Dr. McCoy,
our medical officer,

Mr. Sulu, our helmsman,

and Carl Jaeger, meteorologist.

Welcome, good physicianer

and honorable sir.

Is he kidding?

Und...

Officer Jaeger.

Ein deutsch soldat, nein?

Ein, zwei, drei,

wirgehen vermittels
schiessgewehr.

I'm a scientist,
not a military man.

Oh, come now.

We're all military men
under the skin.

And how we do love our uniforms.

What an interesting weapon

you've got there.

Do let me see it.

Oh...

yes.

Now, let me see.

How does this work?

Ah, yes.

This won't kill,

and this will.

Oh.

Oh, how marvelous!

Devastating!

Why, this could kill millions.

Who will you start with,

my crew?

Are we your next targets?

Oh, how absolutely typical
of your species.

You don't understand some things,

so you become fearful.

Now, do let me anticipate

your next question.

You want to know how
I've managed all ofthis.

That's correct.

We,

meaning I and others,

have,

to state the matter briefly,

perfected a system

by which matter can be
transferred to energy

and back to matter again.

Like the Enterprise's
transporter system.

Oh, a crude example

of an infinitely
more sophisticated process.

You see,

we not only transport matter

from place to place,

but we can alter its shape...

at will.

This drawing room...

did you create it

by rearranging matter
on this planet?

Quite.

I see.

How did you manage--

Your inquiries
are becoming tiresome.

I want you to be happy.

Free yourself of care.

Let's enjoy ourselves

in the spirit of martial
good fellowship.

We're getting out of here.

You're being quite rude.

You can't go.

Apparently,

you need another demonstration

of my authority.

Yes, quite.

[ Coughing ]

Now, that's a sample

of the atmosphere
of this planet

outside my kindly influence.

Now, you will behave yourself

here after, won't you?

Or I shall be very,

very angry.

Captain 's Log-- Stardate 2125. 7.

Science Officer Spock
reporting for Captain Kirk.

We have completed
14th orbit of this planet

without establishing contact
with our missing officers

or the parties sent to find them.

Subspace communications
remain blocked.

However,
by diverting impulse power

to our sensors,

we have made them operable,

and we have detected
one small area

on the surface

which seems relatively stable.

Aye, it's there, Mr. Spock.

Peaceful as Earth,
but how do you explain it?

I don't, Mr. Scott.

It simply exists.

Artificial
or a freak of nature.

The fact remains that life
can exist in that area.

Aye, it could, but it
couldn't move around much.

Apply a fine tuning
on our sensors.

Locate any life-forms
in that stable area.

If we find any,
it may not be our people.

Affirmative.

But if the captain
is down there and alive,

that's where he'll have to be.

We'll attempt to transport up

any living beings
our sensors detect.

Shooting in the dark?

Or stand by and do nothing,
Mr. Scott.

And this, of course,

is an array of your
battle flags and pennants

dating back to the Crusades,

to Hannibal's invaders,

the Grecian war galleys,
and the hordes of Persia.

Can't you imagine it, Captain?

The thousands of men

marching off to their deaths,

singing beneath these banners.

Doesn't it make
your blood run swiftly?

Captain...

where could he
possibly come from?

Who is this maniac?

Better say, what is he?

I monitored him,

and what I found
was unbelievable.

Not alive?

Not in the way we define life.

No trace.

Zero.

You mean...

it shows he's dead?

It doesn't even show
that he exists at all,

alive or dead.

Notice the wood fire, Captain?

Burning steadily,
ember bed glowing,

and it doesn't give off
any heat at all.

Fire without heat,

mistaking all this
for present-day Earth

without taking into account

the time differential.

Whatever we're dealing with,

he certainly isn't
all-knowledgeable.

He makes mistakes.

Discussing deep-laid plans,
I'll wager.

[ Laughs ]

I cannot wait
to see them evolve.

Trelane...

we haven't planned--

Tut-tut.

Do not think that I deplore

your martial virtue

of deception and stratagem.

Quite the contrary.

I have nothing but admiration
for your whole species.

If your admiration
is genuine,

you must have respect
for our sense of duty.

Our ship needs us.
We have tasks to perform.

Oh, I can't let you go now.

I was getting a bit bored
until you came.

You must stay.

I insist.

For how long?

Until this is over.

Until what is over?

Dear Captain, so many questions.

Make the most
ofan uncertain future.

Enjoy yourself today.

Tomorrow...

may never come at all.

Even if we wanted to stay,

our companions are missing us.

Yes, I must experience

your sense of concern,

your grief at the separation.

There are 400 men and women
aboard that ship.

Women?

Do you mean

that you actually have members
of the fairer sex

among your crew?

Oh, how charming.

Ha ha.

And they must be
all very beautiful.

And I shall be
so very gallant to them.

Here, let me fetch them
down at once.

No.

No?

This game has gone on
long enough.

Those are crucial
operating personnel.

You can't--

I can do anything I want.

[ Communicator Beeps ]

Captain, receiving
a transporter signal.

Transporter signal?

What does he mean?

You must tell me!

It means, Trelane...

the party's over,
thanks to Mr. Spock.

Wait! I won't have this!

I haven't dismissed you yet.

Stop!

I won't have this!

Everyone to stations.

Report, Mr. Spock.

How were our scanners able
to penetrate that radiation field?

They didn't, Captain.
Not clearly.

We beamed up all life-forms
in a given area.

Which means Trelane
is not a life-form,

or he'd be
beaming through now.

Prepare to warp
out of here at once.

Oh, Captain, I was so worried.

Scotty, we're going to need

every ounce of your engines.

We're going to put
100 million miles

between us and that madman.

I'm quaking,
but from laughter or terror?

What was it?

What was down there?

Well, it was a--

Oh, forget it.

Look.

Where are all your weapons,
Captain?

Don't you display your weapons?

Trelane.

Don't fret, Captain.

I'm only a bit upset with you,

but this Mr. Spockyou mentioned,

the one responsible
for that unseemly,

impudent act
of taking you from me,

which is he?

I'm Spock.

Oh, surely not an officer.

Isn't quite human, is he?

My father
is from the planet Vulcan.

And are its natives predatory?

Not generally.

But there have been exceptions.

Oh, really?

You will see to his punishment?

On the contrary.
I commend his action.

But I don't like him.

Get off my ship.

Oh, rot! You're all
going back with me.

We're not going anywhere.

Nonsense.

I have an absolutely
enchanting sojourn

on Gothos
planned for you all.

You shan't spoil it for me.

Anyway, the decor
of my drawing room

is much more appropriate

and tasteful.

Don't you agree?

No.

But so much more fitting,
honorable sir.

You...

DeSalle.

Oh, what primitive fury.

Why, he's the very soul
of sublime savagery.

Trelane, let him go.

We haven't even got our phasers.

Yes, of course.

I forget that I shouldn't
frighten you too much.

But I warn you,

you can't provoke me again.

Come, everyone.

Let's forget your bad manners.

Let's be full of merry talk

and sallies ofwit.

We have victuals
to delight the palate

and brave company
to delight the mind.

Come, Doctor,

do partake.

Ah, you've been, uh...

quite derelict

in your social duties, Captain.

You haven't introduced me

to the charming contingent
of your crew.

This is...

General Trelane.

Retired.

But if you prefer,

you may address me

as the lonely squire of Gothos,
dear ladies.

Lieutenant Uhura
of Communications.

Ah...

a Nubian prize.

Taken on one of your raids of conquest,
no doubt, Captain.

No doubt.

She has the melting eyes

of the queen of Sheba,

the same lovely coloring.

And this.

Is this the face

that launched a thousand ships

and burnt the topless towers
of Ilium?

Fair Helen,

make me immortal with a kiss.

Yeoman Teresa Ross.

I believe you have met

our science officer
Mr. Spock.

You do realize, don't you,

that it's in deference
to the captain

that I brought you here?

Affirmative.

Well, I don't know
if I like your tone.

It's most challenging.

That's what you're doing,
challenging me?

I object to you.

I object to intellect
without discipline.

I object to power

without constructive purpose.

Oh, Mr. Spock,

you do have one saving grace
after all.

You're ill-mannered.

The human half of you, no doubt.

Ah, come,

my little wood nymph.

Won't you dance with your swain?

Give us some sprightly music,
my dear girl.

Oh, I don't know
how to play this.

Of course you do.

Captain,

how far do we go along
with this charade?

Until we can think
our way out.

Meanwhile, we accept
his hospitality.

You should taste his food.

Straw would taste better
than his meat,

water a hundred times
better than his brandy.

Nothing has any taste at all.

It may be unappetizing,
Doctor,

but it is very logical.

There's that magic word again.

Does your logic find this
fascinating, Mr. Spock?

No. "Fascinating" is a word
I use for the unexpected.

In this case,

I should think "interesting"
would suffice.

You don't find this
unexpected, Mr. Spock?

That his food has no taste,
his wine no flavor?

No. It simply means

that Trelane knows
all ofthe Earth forms,

but none ofthe substance.

And if he's fallible,

he can't be all-powerful,

which means he has
something helping him.

Evidently.

A machine?

A device?

Something which does
these things for him.

Ah, my dear, don't we make
a graceful pair?

Except for one small detail--

that dress hardly matches
this charming scene.

Ah, yes, that's more
what we want--

the dashing warrior
and his elegant lady.

That mirror...

it's part of his audience,
his ego.

He never wanders from it.

Is it ego...

or something else?

Explain.

The mirror.

What?

You noted he never
gets far from it.

I suppose it could be vanity.

No, no, Mr. Spock,
that's not the reason.

What kind ofa machine
could do these things?

A machine with the ability

to turn energy into matter

guided by thought waves.

It would have
a very complex memory bank.

It would be
extremely sophisticated.

Like a computer,
only much more.

Could the machine

that maintains the environment
in this immediate area

be kept in this house?

I think not.

A device capable

of keeping out this planet's
natural atmosphere

would be immense.

Good. I agree.

That leaves me free.

Free, Captain?

If I'm not mistaken,
Mr. Spock,

I think I can turn
his lights off

at the source.

Don't be too upset
by what you see, gentlemen.

After all,
his actions are those

ofan immature, unbalanced mind.

I overheard that remark,
Captain.

I'm afraid I'll have
to dispense with you.

You only heard part of it.

I just started.

Oh?

Yes. I want you
to leave my crew alone.

Don't dance with him.

Did it make you angry?

Don't accept his gifts,
either.

I believe the dear captain's
Jealous of me.

I don't care what you believe.

Keep your hands off her!

How curiously human,
how wonderfully barbaric.

I've had enough
of your attentions to her.

Of course.

That's the root
of the matter, isn't it?

You fight for the attention,
admiration,

possession of women.

If it's fighting
that you want,

you may have it.

Are you challenging me
to a duel?

If you have the courage.

This is better
than I'd planned.

I shall not shirk
an affair of honor.

A matched set--

Just like the pair

that slew your heroic
Alexander Hamilton.

And, Captain...

I never miss.

Captain 's Log,

Stardate 2126. 1,
delayed report--

the whole bridge crew
are the unwilling guests

of the creature
who calls himself Trelane.

We are weaponless, powerless,

and our only hope of escape

with the Enterprise

lies in playing his games.

I've decided to make my move

with the field-of-honor game,

and everything depends
on my one chance

with the ancient dueling pistol.

Oh, how fascinating.

I'm party
to an actual human duel.

Ready?

Quite ready, sir.

We shall test
each other's courage,

and then...

and then we shall see.

Let's get on with it.

As you will, sir.

Honor will be served, eh?

Oh, wait!

As the one challenged,
I claim the first shot.

We shoot together.

It's my game and my rules,

but if you need
to be persuaded...

All right.

Captain...

And now, Captain,
how do you have the expression?

My fate is in your hands.

You've ruined everything!

The machine.

[ Communicator Beeps ]

Subspace interference
is clearing.

Try to contact the ship.

The remarkable treachery
of this species.

Go on, Trelane. Look at it.

It's over.

Your power is blanked out.

You're finished.

You've earned my wrath.

Go back.
Go back to your ship,

all of you,

and prepare.

You're all dead men--

you especially, Captain.

Trelane?

Everyone, we're getting out
of here, and now.

This is the captain.

Commence beaming up--
maximum speed.

Set course for Colony Beta 6.

Linking, sir.

Full-power acceleration
from orbit, Mr. Scott.

Full power, sir.

Emergency warp at the earliest
possible moment,

Mr. Sulu.

Standing by to warp, sir.

Shall I make a full report
to Spacefleet Command?

Not yet.
They may trace our beam.

Wait until we're
well out of range.

Can we know his range,
Captain?

We can take an educated guess--

at the point we entered
their solar system.

Still no sign of pursuit.

Instruments clear, sir.

Good.

May I take a moment to change?

Yes, I think you might.

Turn in your glass slippers.

The ball is over.

Gladly, Captain.

Hard to believe
that it ever happened.

Captain, we're about to warp.

Large body ahead.

Collision course.

Hard to port, Mr. Sulu.

That was the planet Gothos,
Captain.

Gothos!

Have we been going in circles?

No. All instruments
show on-course.

Gothos again.

Hard over.

Cat-and-mouse game.

With us as the mouse.

90 degrees to starboard,
Mr. Sulu.

Turning, Captain.

Now veering aftwards.

90 degrees subport, Mr. Sulu.

Adjust.

Turn completed

and still accelerating
toward the planet.

Or it toward us.

Decelerate into orbit.
Prepare transporter room.

Captain,
you're not beaming down.

Yes, I am, Dr. McCoy.

I am going to see
our playful Mr. Trelane

and whatever it takes

to make him give up our ship.

Stand by communications.

If you don't receive a message
from me within the hour,

Leave the vicinity at once.
No turning back.

The prisoner
may approach the bench.

Trelane.

Any attempt at demonstrations

will weigh against you
with the court,

and this time my instrumentality
is unbreakable.

I've had enough of your games.

Oh, the absurdity
of these inferior beings.

"And now, Captain James Kirk,

you stand accused
of the high crime oftreason

against a superior authority,

conspiracy,

and the attempt
to foment insurrection."

How do you plead?

I haven't come to plead
in your court, Trelane.

Anything you might say
has already been taken down

in evidence against you.

I've come to get back my ship.

Irrelevant.

We've made you angry
with our will to survive?

Uncalled-for.

Then vent your anger
on me alone.

I led the others.

I shot out your mirror machine.

Did you think that was the only
medium of instrumentality

at my command?

I took that chance.

I'm willing to pay the price
for chancing wrong.

Oh, then you do admit
to the charges?

Yes, anything!

Just allow the Enterprise

to continue its journey.

Uhh!

You pompous--

Immaterial!

Those people
have done you no harm.

Inadmissible!

We're living beings,
not playthings for your amusement.

Silence!
This trial is over.

You are guilty.

On all counts,
you are guilty.

According to your own laws,

this court has no choice
in fixing punishment.

You will hang by the neck,
Captain,

until you are dead, dead, dead!

Captain 's Log, Stardate 2126.3.

First Officer Spock reporting.

Still no word from Captain Kirk

on the surface below us.

Waiting time is almost up.

I willsoon be forced
to attempt departure

as per instructions.

Until a moment ago,
I didn't think it possible,

but it was.

I did it. I was angry.

I actually experienced
genuine rage.

This experiment
has been successful.

I'm glad you weren't
disappointed.

Why, Captain,
you're still angry.

Would that I could
have sustained that moment.

Ah, no matter.

Do you have a last request?

If you think I'm going to
obediently stick my head

in that noose--

You still haven't learned.
You have no choice.

Oh, this is becoming
quite tiresome.

It's all so very easy.

That's your problem,
Trelane--

everything's easy.

It's given you a bad habit.

You're not aware of it,
but you have it.

You don't think, Trelane.

That's your problem.

You miss opportunities,

Iike your anger before
and mine right now.

Oh, you enjoy it,

but you couldn't have
accomplished it without me,

and you know why?

Because you're
a bumbling, inept fool.

Take care, now.

Here you have an opportunity

to experience
something really unique,

and you're wasting it.

You want to commit murder?

Go ahead, but where's the sport
in a simple hanging?

The sport?

Yes...

the terror of murder,

the suspense,

the fun.

Oh, I'm intrigued.

Go ahead, Captain.

What do you suggest?

A personal conflict
between us--

not like the duel before,

but the real thing.

The stakes?

A human life--mine.

Oh...

yes!

Yes!

That's the idea.

Oh, then you approve?

Yes,

but...

you can do better than that.

There's still not enough sport

in killing me with a sword.

I know. That will be dull.

We'll have to have
something more fanciful.

Let me see...

a hunt, a royal hunt--

predator against predator.

Now, you may go hide in the forest--
anywhere you like--

and I shall seek.

How does that strike you,
Captain?

It strikes me...

very well...

but you'll have to make it
worth my while, Trelane.

Why not up the stakes?

The stakes?

Yes.

While we're playing our game,

free my ship.

Let it continue on its way.

In return,

I'll give you a contest
you'll remember.

Always back to your ship.

Oh, well...

if it will add spice
to the pursuit...

I accept your terms, Captain.

[ Trelane ]
Remember, you must try

not to let me find you
too quickly.

Let me notify the Enterprise

that it can go.

At your convenience.

Enterprise...

Enterprise, this is Kirk.

Can you hear me?

[ Static ]

Get the ship away
as fast as you can.

I'll try and give you
the time you need.

Can you hear me?

Aha!

Enterprise...

Ha ha!

Captain Kirk.

You must try harder,
Captain.

This is too easy.

Enterprise...

Enterprise, can you hear me?

Touche, Captain. Touche.

I must confess you scored first,

but after all, I never played
this game before.

And now let's have at it again!

Ha ha ha!

Enterprise...

Enterprise...

Aha!

Tallyho!

Aha...

You made a noble fight
of it, Captain.

Remember, you promised
to let my ship go.

But this is such sport.

I must fetch all
the others back to play.

So this is victory.

It has a sweet taste.

Down, Captain--

on your knees!

You haven't won, Trelane.

I could run you through!

But you haven't won anything.

On your knees, Captain!

No!

Does it still taste as sweet?

I order you.
You've been beaten!

But I'm not defeated.

I order you! I order you!

You broke it!

You broke my sword!

You've got a lot to learn
about winning, Trelane.

You dare to defy me!

You've got a lot
to learn about everything.

I'll fix you! You cheated!

You haven't played the game right.

I'll show you!

[ Woman's Voice ]
Trelane!

No!

No!

You said I could have
this planet.

[ Man's Voice ]
This has gone far enough.

But you always stop me
when I'm having fun.

You're disobedient and cruel.

We've told you before.

Time to come in now, Trelane.

I don't want to come in,
and I won't.

I'm a general,

and I won't listen to you.

Enough, Trelane. Come along.

But why?

I didn't do anything wrong.

I was just playing.

We said come along.

But I haven't finished
studying my predators yet.

This is not studying them.

If you cannot take proper care
of your pets,

you cannot have them.

Aw, but I was winning.
I was winning.

They're beings, Trelane.

They have spirit.
They're superior.

No, no. You saw.

You'll grow up, Trelane.

You'll understand.

Now come along.

Aw, but you said I could.

You promised.

I never have any fun.

Stop that nonsense at once,

or you'll not be permitted
to make any more planets.

Aw, but you saw.

I was winning.

I would have won...

honest.

No, Trelane.

No, Trelane.

I would have.

I would have.

I would have.

I would.

I would.

I would.

I would.

Captain, we regret

that the life paths
of yourself and your companions

have been disturbed.

Who are you?

Who is Trelane?

You must forgive our child.

The fault is ours
for indulging him too much.

He will be punished.

We would not have
let him intercept you

had we realized
your vulnerability.

Forgive us, Captain.

We will maintain
your life-support conditions

while you return to your ship.

Please accept our apologies.

Captain to Enterprise.

Captain to Enterprise.

[ Spock ]
Captain, we're receiving you.

Beam me up, Mr. Spock.

We're free to go.

Warping down, Captain.

Our warp factor--4.

Approach channels clear, Captain.

Colony Beta 6 clears us

for normal approach, sir.

Normal orbit approach
procedures, Mr. Sulu.

Captain.

Still thinking about Trelane,
is that it?

For the record,
how do we describe him--

pure mentality,
force of intellect,

embodied energy, superbeing?

He must be classified, sir.

God of war, Mr. Spock.

Well, I hardly
find that fitting.

Then a small boy,

and a very naughty one.

It will make a strange entry
in the library banks.

He was a very strange
small boy.

He was probably doing
things comparable

to the mischievous pranks
you played

when you were a boy.

Mischievous pranks, Captain?

Yes--

dipping little girls' curls
in inkwells,

stealing apples
from the neighbors' trees,

tying cans on--

Forgive me...

Mr. Spock.

I should have known better.

I shall be delighted,
Captain.