St. Elsewhere (1982–1988): Season 3, Episode 1 - Playing God: Part 1 - full transcript

Here I am at work again -

after a month of sleeping late and
home cooking, I'm back in Boston.

Oh, Boston in the summer,
gives a whole new meaning

to the word "shvitz",

which brings me to the new
first year residents,

who I've been given the honour of
leading around on their first day.

On the looks of this bunch,

my sympathies to anyone who gets
sick in the next three months.

Now you are going to see
how St Eligius really works.

Elliott, pass these out.

Nice hands, Elliott.



Thanks.

Everyone, pick one up.

Turn to page XXI.

Who here reads?

I do.

Fine. Read the section,
"What Is A Resident?"

"A person, who having been regularly
admitted to a medical school,

"duly recognised in the country
in which it is located,

"has completed the prescribed
course of study and medicine -

"and has acquired
the requisite qualifications

"to be legally licensed
to practise medicine."

That is...wrong.

A resident, especially a
first year resident, is nothing.

The days are 36 hours long.



Sleep is a fond childhood memory.

Everything you think you learned,
don't think about it.

This place certainly fell
apart while I was gone.

The city made them close it.

After all the money they
spent on reconstruction, I can,

without hesitation, say that
this ER still looks like a dump.

Annie, Phil...

I guess this is what happens
when the umpire strikes back.

Excuse me!

Anybody want to grab this one?

Excuse me.
Looks like heat exhaustion.

Possible angina attack.
Is he taking any medication?

His wife said he took

two nitroglycerine sublingual
a few minutes ago.

Help me get him on a gurney.

Take his blood pressure
and get a heart rate.

Shirley, start an IVD 5LR. Elliott,
oxygen, four litres per minute

and let's get him on a monitor now.

You don't know something, you just
ask. If no-one's around, you guess.

What if we guess wrong?

Next stop on the tour, the morgue.

What do you keep in there -
addresses? So, where was I?

Philadelphia.

Oh, yes. I said, "Take the cotton
out of your ears and listen to me."

She says, "What?" She's got this
otitis media ear infection.

She picked it up when
she fell out of the boat.

How did you spend your month off?

I got involved in the
nuclear freeze movement.

Trust me, Jack,
there's no future in it.

Hi, guys, what's up?

Jack's gone activist on us. No nukes.

BLEEPING

See you later!

What brought this on? Clancy.

A boy, a girl or a Cocker Spaniel?

She's at Radcliffe. We have
a meaningful relationship

and she thinks Pete is great.

And the sex is incredible.

Yeah.

Does she have a sister?

Howdy-doody, Lucy,
what's your problem?

Mrs Sato's repertory
rate is still low since

you extirpated her yesterday.

Oh, brother, what am I going to do?

In my opinion, you should knock off
the morphine and put her on Narcan.

Hey, babe, I'd change the
medication order right now

but my hands are tied.

I thought that was Roberta's problem!

This is Dr Swales' patient.

Swales!

Yes, the Invisible Man!

He's got admitting privileges,
but he's never here.

No big deal.
Just call him and get the OK.

No, you call him.

Oh, me call him.
That's right, I forgot.

This is "Nurses Are People Too" Week
at St Eligius.

Erlich... What, honey?

If it's the last thing I do,
I'm going to dance on your grave.

Oh you will, huh? Great.

Thank you, Lucy - thoughts like that
help carry me through the day(!)

The morgue.

A cool place to hang out on a day
like today. Just ask these guys.

OK, everybody, turn to page XXXIV,
"Pronouncing A Patient Dead."

Who's our first contestant?

Is this mic on?
I know you're out there.

I can here you breathing.

You, step up. Don't be shy.

I've seen dead bodies before.

Well, you'll be good at this game.
Pick a door, any door.

You can win an all-expense
paid trip to Province.

You're awfully glib.

What's your name?

Po. Alan Po.

Dr Po, pick a door.

This is stupid.

No, this is the morgue.
You're not paying attention.

Go ahead!

There, big deal.

Now what do you do?

I enter the time of death,

my final note and call
the attending physician.

You forgot something.

Oh?

Yep, he's dead.

You know, I don't think any
of this is so damn funny.

Neither do I.

The patients you'll pronounce,
you'll have never seen before.

To their families,
you'll be a stranger with bad news.

Other families you'll have
gotten to know and to them,

you'll be a friend with bad news.

Either way, it stinks.

At least a sense of humour will
keep you out of the psych ward.

OK?
OK. Now on with the tour.

We're going to go to the third
floor for heavy metal and cutlery.

Elliott, close the door.

I know, I know. I've got
the reports right in front of me.

Look, Mrs Hatch. I don't think giving
a couple of ghetto kids scholarships

is going to ruin St Ursula's.

Besides, think of how good it
will be for our basketball team.

Bull!

I am not interested in preserving
the snob appeal of this school

at the expense of other children.

Father Flynn is here. We're already
ten minutes late for the meeting.

Mrs Hatch, I appreciate your concern.

I realise how much
you've done for us.

I guess it was just your bad luck
that I was elected Mother Superior,

for life.

Yeah. I'll see you in church.

I know, I should have
been more tactful.

Her husband is head of our
order's finance committee.

And she's a bigot. Lindsay...

Theresa told me you're in a
hurry so I'll keep it short.

I just got off the phone
with the archdiocese.

They regrettably passed
on giving us a new computer system.

How do you expect these
kids to graduate with real skills

unless they have the right equipment?

I think we should
go ahead and order the computers.

The parish can't afford to.
How will we pay for it?

Tonight, the Sisters and I will
start a novena and pray for it.

You're kidding.

No, I'm not. It works wonders.

Like last winter, when we
needed a new heating system.

My prayers are always answered.

I've got a great track record.
The money will appear.

OK, OK.

I'll go back to the foundation to
see if we can get an extra grant.

Thank you, Lindsay. I was hoping
you'd say that. Is the car out front?

Got to run.

We're stopping by the bakery.
Can we bring you anything?

A tart.

Lemon?

KNOCK AT DOOR

Come in.

Hi! It's freezing in here.
Can you turn that thing down?

I'm afraid it has only
one setting - Arctic!

There was a meeting last
night of the nurses' union.

Making plans for the annual picnic?

They want to know when you and I

are going to schedule our next
round of contract negotiations.

What seems to be the rush?

It's been dragging
on for a month now.

Sorry, Daniel, I don't mean
to sound overly argumentative.

How come you expect us to
work without a contract?

You have a contract.

KNOCK AT DOOR

Ah, the only functioning air
conditioner in the building. Hi!

One of the perks of
being Chief of Services.

You know, there's a consensus over
at the union that you're stalling.

We've had 16 bargaining sessions,
including that 12-hour marathon.

They've asked me to file unfair
labour charges against this hospital.

That's ridiculous.

Don't they realise that this is the
first time in St Eligius's history

we've had to deal
with the nurses' union.

Besides, Daniel's been preoccupied
with the ER reconstruction

and he's still recovering
from that collapse in the elevator.

I'm feeling fine.
Are you free at 4 o'clock?

Yes, I am.

I think we can work out
our differences then.

Me too. Thanks for the sweater.

I'm glad to see you two are
getting close to settling this.

Frankly, Donald, the woman and
I don't see eye to eye at all.

(SNEEZES)

Gesundheit.

You know, I used to think
doing the Lord's work

was simply a matter of faith,
not files.

Buckle up, Teresa.

In a minute!
I've got to admit something to you.

Wait! Don't tell me, you're
thinking about jumping over the wall.

Not since Vatican two.

All those changes
did not make any sense to me.

Suddenly, everything I grew up
believing wasn't kosher any more.

If you left now, I'd never be able
to decipher your filing system.

Will you let me finish my thought?

Sorry.

I love the way you stood up
to Mrs Hatch. I could never do that.

It's not hard to stand up
to ignorant people.

All you need is an iron
will and a big mouth.

The good Lord blessed me with both -
and you.

The reason you say that is because
I can type 100 words a minute.

That's true. But you're the
one that really runs the order.

Listen to us, you'd think we
were in line for sainthood.

Oh, my God!

Help us, please.

I'm going to the little girl's room.

Why do you guys get to
wear shorts and we don't?

Most doctors have
better legs than nurses.

Just say doctors are better than
nurses. That's what you mean.

There has been a paid
announcement by the nurses' union.

I have never been a big fan of
unions, especially the one I'm in.

But there's not one damn thing
you can do better than I can.

Yes, there is.
What?

Breakdance.

Wanna bet?

Seriously, I think it's
terrible that the hospital's

ignoring your demands for equal pay.

It's not just the money.
It's under staffing and job security

and shift differentials.
Discrimination, health insurance.

Performing non-nursing functions.

Continuing training and
tuition assistance.

What have we got?

55-year-old female.
Car collision, found unconscious.

Any associated injuries?

Probable neck injury.

Seniority, sick days,
holidays, vacation.

OK, Shirley.

OK, we want to admit
her to overnight holding.

Neural checks every hour. I want a
skull series and neurology consults.

Shouldn't I call nuclear
medicine to schedule a CAT scan?

Right.

She's a nun. Isn't her habit sacred?

I think this is one of those times
when God will look the other way.

The doctor performing this bypass

is the foremost surgeon at
St Eligius, Dr Mark Craig.

Wasn't he the one that
did the heart transplant?

That's right.
Notice the concentration.

Notice the way he leads the team
like the conductor of a symphony

or the foreman of
a road repair gang.

St Eligius has such a great
reputation as a teaching hospital

because of professionals
of Mark Craig's calibre.

Like all good doctors,
he never loses his patience.

Safety glass.

You soon discover that people who
enter the surgical residency

are a special breed. Rabid.

I can't believe you're still
tying knots like a tenderfoot

at a Scout jamboree.

Dr Bowers, would you close, please?

Dr Craig, I'd like
you to meet someone.

Get out of my way!

Dr Craig, please.
I just had a rough night on call.

Let's eat.

Hello, Sister. I'm Dr Westphall.

Hello, doctor.
How's the arm?

It's not broken.

Good! I'm taking care
of Sister Teresa.

Is she conscious yet?

No, I'm afraid she isn't.

I called the convent. They're
sending someone over to get you.

Thank you. I'd like to see her.

I don't think that would
be a good idea today.

Still, I'd like to.

All right.

I bet you think I'm going to be
making a lot of snide remarks

about the quality of cuisine served
here daily in the cafeteria.

Well, I'm not. The dieticians go
to incredible lengths to ensure

patients and staff receive a
nutritionally balanced bill of fare,

which, when you think about it,
makes it even sadder that,

despite all these efforts,
the food here is crap.

We pay for this?

Who'd steal it?

Fiscus and the flock.

Remember when we were on
the same tour a year ago?

Yeah, you kept asking
where the men's room was.

And he never found it.

Ehrlich, you heard from Swales?

No, he hasn't returned my call.

I hope he does soon.
Mr Sato's not getting any better.

Why don't you come and sit with us?

Can't. Got a meeting.

Solidarity.

You think they are really
going to go on strike?

What difference does it make?

A big one! It'll be hell doing our
jobs if they are not doing theirs!

That's why they'd be selfish to go
on strike. We're in this together.

You'd still have the candy store.

I rest my case.

Hi.

Clancy, hi.

Is this seat taken?

Oh, no, no. Sit.

Hi.

Hello. I'm Jacqueline Wade.

I'm Clancy Williams.

Oh, I'm sorry. This is, er...

Jack's a good friend. James Kildare.

Yeah. Nice to meet you.

Listen, Boomer, I don't mean
to be rude, but we gotta talk.

OK. See you later.

Bye-bye. Bye.

(BOTH) "Boomer"?!

Dr Craig.

What is it, Ehrlich?

I've got a problem.

Only one, huh?

After your haphazard, clumsy
performance in the OR today,

you may be here in body, but your
brains are still on vacation.

Fine. Well, Dr Swales...

Who?

Exactly! He's got
admitting privileges here,

and I've been assigned
one of his patients.

You know, I have tried to reach
him but without any luck.

Mrs Sato's condition is worsening
and I have to change her meds fast!

Then do it!

I can't change his orders. He is an
attending and I'm only a resident.

You are also a moron.

When a human life is in the balance,

protocol goes out the window.
Do I make myself understood?

Yes, sir.

And, Ehrlich, I appreciate
the fact that you don't wear shorts.

With my legs, sir? Never.

I promise I won't stay long.
I wouldn't want to do anything

that would jeopardise her care.

Well, it's not Sister Teresa
I'm worried about right now.

Everyone suffers a certain amount of
trauma after a serious accident.

Most people don't realise the
full effects for several days.

I was driving the car.

Why was I going so fast?

Well, you are lucky to
be alive, both of you.

Now, please, don't expect
too much too soon.

How bad is she?

Well, the damage was extensive,
but her condition is stable.

BLEEPING

Teresa, what have I done to you?

Her CAT scan showed a haemorrhage in
her brain that we can't operate on.

Results indicate the condition of
her brain is likely irreversible.

When will you know for sure?

We won't have a picture of what is
going on for a couple of hours.

I have also asked for a second
opinion from our top neurologist.

Sister, the chances are she'll remain
in a coma the rest of her life.

Irreversible brain damage.

What are they doing?

That's a ventilator. It's one of the
support systems keeping her alive.

You all set, Frank?

So what happens now?

We keep the machines going until
her body can function for itself.

How long will that take?

I don't know.

I was driving the car, you know.

Do you mind if I
stay here for a while?

No, I'll tell the nurse.

Thank you.

It's all right, Teresa.

I am here.

What do you mean, it went
better than you expected?

I was nervous about
you meeting my friends.

Did you think I'd embarrass you?

No!

Good, because I'm saving
that for your family.

Sometimes I think all you want to do
is give me a hard time. There you go.

OK? OK, here, here.
No, no, stay there.

Not now. We're not alone.

I don't know what it is.
I can't keep my hands off you.

Oh, I'm off next Wednesday,

so we're on for the August Moon
Festival. All the MSG you can handle.

Talk about bad timing.

I went to see my gynaecologist
this morning.

Anything wrong?

No, it's just that the rabbit died.

You're pregnant?

Yeah. The Williams clan
is a prolific bunch.

All you have to do
is look at us funny.

Before you crack open the champagne,

I should tell you
I'm not going to have it.

I don't want to
complicate our lives.

What?

It's no big deal. I'll be in and
out of the clinic in an afternoon.

You'll have performed lots of them.

As a matter of fact, I haven't.

Clancy, don't you think
we should talk about this?

We are talking about it, I'm
telling you what I'm doing!

Don't I have any say?

This is the doctors' lounge,
and this is none of our business.

There is no room in my life
for a kid right now.

No offence, little Boomer.

I'm not been callous
about this, just practical.

I've given it a lot of thought.
You've got to trust me here, Jack.

It makes perfect sense.

I have to get to class.

Bye.

Clancy.

I think what you're doing is wrong.

You never cease to amaze me, Jack.

SIREN BLARES

Who brought the marshmallows?

Oh boy, no water pressure.

There ought to be a law stopping
kids from turning on the hydrants.

There is a law.

Yeah, then they ought to enforce it.

It wasn't long ago I used to do
this. What better way to cool off?

I bet your dad would
love to hear about that.

His dad was a great fireman.
What's he doing these days?

He has been tanning up all summer.

Hey, kid, put the mask on.

CRASH!

We've got two guys
from the warehouse fire.

We have got a 60-year-old male with
burns on the neck, face, scalp.

I've got this one.

You got it.

Breathing's erratic.

Can you feel that?

Yeah.

Are the other two guys all right?

Sure.

Possible damage to the lungs. We will
have to intubate so he can breathe.

Can you move your fingers?

I can't.

Take it easy.

I'm going to clean up the burns.

Found another one.

Male, black, forties.

60% body burns.

Fix body fluids
and expand his circulation.

CBP tray, admission lab,
type and cross. IV...

Mine's stabilised. Need a hand?

Yes, this guy is in big trouble.

Hello.

I understand you've
been here all afternoon.

The longer I sit here,
the clearer one thing becomes.

What's that?

It was my fault.

I thought it was an accident.

What'll I do if the test shows
that her condition is permanent?

The answer will come to you.

I know.

Through prayer.

Whenever I was involved in a project,

I never thought my participation
was very important.

I always thought,
the wheels are in motion

and whoever is in my job,
the work will get done successfully.

What changed your mind?

I was elected head of the order.

I realised that some things were
different because I did them.

Me, I made the difference.

And you have accomplished a lot?

Yes. Because I have been as
fanatical as any convert

in my attempt to do things.

I have charged ahead,
insensitive, fast, faster, too fast.

Sister Teresa has suffered for it.
Maybe the whole order.

What you have lost sight of is

God has chosen to do His work
through you.

I'm so ashamed.

I need your help.

How?

Will you hear my confession?

I think I already have.

What's the rush?

You work next to somebody for years
and you think you know them.

Surprise!

Union this, union that!

All I wanted was a cup of coffee.

What happened?

Helen Rosenthal's more interested in
politics than she is her patients.

You'd think she was with the road
company of Evita. If I were you,

I would cut her hours in half, let
her sew union labels on her own time.

I don't think that's
the answer, Mark.

Besides, I have these
negotiations under control.

You be careful, Daniel. You're
coming off another chemo cycle.

Wasn't too long ago you
were buns up in the elevator.

That's why I use the stairs.

Ah!

Only two more hours to go.

It's almost over.

Ehrlich, guess who just showed up?

Who?

Doctor Swales.

Oh, really?

He wants to meet the thinking
resident who put Mrs Sato on Narcan.

He has a few words to say to you.

I've got a few words to say to him.
Where is he?

Doctors' lounge.

(TANNOY) 'Nurse Jackson, 4592,
Nurse Jackson, 4592.'

Swales?

What, you only show up here
for doughnuts? Wise guy, huh?

Let me tell you something.

It's guys like you put a patient
in any hospital with a free bed,

and then forget about them and make
life miserable for the rest of us!

If I had half a mind, I would sue
you for malpractice. Mrs Sato, too.

I mean, she should sue you.
You know what I'm talking about.

Ehrlich?

That's the name, my friend.
E-H-R-L-I-C-H.

I know I'm only a resident,
and you're a hotshot attending.

When it comes to human life,
protocol goes out the window,

and I don't
care if you toss me out with it,

if you think you're a man enough!

I do not understand
your language very good,

but I thank you. Most humbly.

Doughnut?

Sure.

Maybe I'll just split one.

First, there's morning rounds, then
X-ray rounds, then afternoon rounds.

And a coffee break of ground rounds.

Usually, there is a midday lecture
from a house faculty position,

and then afternoon rounds.

There is a tendency, due to
the intimacy with which we work,

to seek sexual gratification
within the confines of the hospital.

I have seen some of my contemporaries

compromise the integrity of
the medical oath for carnal lust.

People need love in the morgue,
in the OR, in the elevator.

Take my word for it,

it's not worth being the victim of
innuendo and rumour.

Frankly, I'm glad I never got caught.

But, boy, would I love
to take a shot at Cavanero.

Fiscus!

Every time I go through a tollbooth,
it's frustrating to realise

that the person who takes my change
is making the same salary I am!

You made that point, Helen...

an hour ago.

Perhaps that indicates we have
been at this long enough for today.

You want a ride?

Yeah.

Do you have a minute?

Yes.

Why do I get the feeling
this is getting personal?

There's nothing
personal about it, Helen.

It's part of negotiating.

You would know that if you had
been at this as long as I have been.

I think it's time we
brought in a federal mediator.

Nonsense. At this stage of the
game, that would be a mistake.

This isn't a game. Do you think our
grievances are just selfish demands?

Don't you understand that
by giving us what we ask for,

the quality of care will improve?

Not if there isn't a
hospital here to put them in.

I think your loyalties
are confused, Helen.

What you fail to realise is that
your union is already out of date.

The nurses are voting this
afternoon to authorise a strike.

I hope it doesn't come to that.

How are negotiations going?

We're pleased with progress
that has been made.

Will there be a strike?

Ask her.

Excuse me, Sister.

I've got to suction out
the breathing tube.

Can I get you a
pillow for your knees?

That won't be necessary, thank you.

Rule number XCVI,
don't smoke in the burns unit.

Makes the patients very nervous.
A-ha!

This Dr Caldwell.
I'm in love with him.

Stop it, Fiscus.

Everyone bring their swimsuits? Dr
Caldwell's gonna talk hydrotherapy.

Basically, it's a
very simple procedure.

Patient's bandages had been removed,
he's been placed in a hydra tank.

Basically, the water loosens
the crud from the burns,

so that after he gets out, we
can cut off all the dead skin.

Wait a minute!

Your rotation here can
last up to two months.

Or as short as three seconds.

Hey, it's her body and her life.
Mind your own business!

If you had a child, it wouldn't
be so easy for you to say that.

An embryo is a living...

Don't talk pro-life to me. You are in
no position to support another kid.

How do tell a nun that
she is getting to be a pain?

Have you tried Latin?

It just seems to be
that the man should...

I mean, it's his baby too.

Especially if he loves the woman.

There's always one other option.

What's that?

You could always ask Clancy
to marry you.

Hello.

I'm not here for a physical,
I just got to see the doctor.

Take a number.

Hot, isn't it?

All right, so you just
take this form down to room 304,

and give it to the receptionist.

Who's 47?

How you doing?

Good.

You're 47a.

Da-rum!

It's not the male clinic,
but it's home.

I never thought I'd end up
practising corporate medicine.

The good thing is, I give these
guys an excuse to get out of work,

they give me a couple of bucks.

I got a letter from Laura,
talks about the kids.

I thought you would want it.

There's no return address on here.

And no postmark. Where are my kids?

I don't know.

Why's she doing this to me?

Because, despite what
the court says, in her mind...

Yeah, I'm a rapist.
It still isn't fair.

I mean,
I still got rights to see my kids.

Well, don't worry. You'll find them.

You're a good friend.

You've stuck by me from the opening
bell. Why do you do that?

Because you told me you're
innocent, and that's enough.

And I couldn't believe you were
capable of what they accused you.

I wish you were running St Elegius,

then I would be practising
real medicine, instead of this.

You got any news on your court case?

Yeah, I should know soon.
My lawyer says there's a good chance

the courts will force Westphall
into taking me back.

I'll tell you something, that
will drive him berserk, too.

He's a good man, Peter.

Do you want to get some dinner?

No, I can't.

Are you on call?

No, I've got a date.

No kidding!

BANGING AT DOOR

Come on!
I've got deliveries to make.

Better get outta here.
47a's getting restless.

What's your problem?

They barely got these guys
out of the fire in time.

Why would someone become a fireman?

Too risky for this
boy, I'll tell you.

Getting cats out of trees,
sliding down a pole is one thing,

but trying to douse a
towering inferno is another.

Takes a better man than you are.

Course, I always had
a thing for Dalmatians.

Well, how is Roberta?

Gadedy-boom!

There you go.
Shotwell.

Here you go, Peggy.

I'm kind of confused.
Are we voting to strike or not?

No, all you're doing is
authorising the union

to use the strike as a last ditch
effort to settle the dispute.

That sounds fair.

I don't know why we are
bothering with secret ballots.

Oh, good, I'm not too late.

You still have five minutes.
Daniels.

Can't I just put on here,
hire more nurses?

Circle "yes" or "no", Shirley.

Look, if I vote no, then we vote to
strike, do I have to stop working?

Well, we'd like everyone
to support the group's decision,

but we would have to keep
a skeleton crew on here to help out.

You could be part of that.

I didn't even want to
join the damn union.

Excuse me, I have got to cut in.
Give me a ballot.

Strike.

Bye. Bye.

Beryl.

Hey, Dr Caldwell.

Michael.

Mike.

How are the others doing?

Well, you all made it.

So, what happens to us next?

A little bit different
for each of you.

Recovering from burns
is a slow process.

You'll be seeing a lot of me over
the next few weeks and vice versa.

Is my family here?

Yeah, downstairs.

I don't think right now is the
best time for them to be visiting.

You sure we're going to be all right?

Yeah.

I know you're in a lot of
pain, but try to get some sleep.

It's kind of tricky with someone
in every hour, checking my pulse.

Doze around it. You guys
should be used to doing that.

Yeah.

At least I won't have to
hear those clowns snoring.

Risking your lives that way,
I don't know how you do it.

I try not to think about it.

Thanks for all your help.

After what you guys have done,

heck, I'm just returning the favour.

There.

So you don't think
the strike is a good idea?

I didn't say that. Exactly.

Oh, sorry.
I'm here to pick up the garbage.

I'll see you in an hour.

So, what's that stuff for, cancer?

Yes. It helps to shrink the mass.

Hasn't anybody thought to give that
to people before they get cancer?

Wouldn't help.

Oh, that's too bad, cos
I know I'm going to get it.

How do you know that?

I read the paper. Everything causes
cancer, there's nothing you can do.

That's not true. Don't smoke,

drink in moderation, have a proper
diet and avoid excessive sunlight.

Believe me, it's not
my tan I need to work on.

As far as the other stuff,
though, I'll work on it.

But how come a guy like you, who
knows so much, still got trapped?

That's a question I ask
myself every single day.

Doc,

when you die...

Yes.

..can I have your stereo?

(LAUGHS)

Not the records.

No, just the stereo.

One more. You're going to
love this picture.

OK, your ID will be out tomorrow.

We have been here all day,
and now they're taking our picture.

Welcome to St Elegius.

OK, Dr Axelrod, you're the last one.

Call me Elliott.
Just because I'm a doctor now

doesn't mean you have to treat me
differently than before.

OK by me. Just get up on the stool
and smile, fat boy.

Oh.

That's it!

Some say the patron saint
of craftsmen and artisans,

but my guess is,
bowling alleys and tea parties.

That's why this place is sometimes
referred to as St Elsewhere,

a place you wouldn't
send your tax auditor to.

This poor statue gets a lot of abuse.
Better him than us.

After all, he is a saint.

Yeah.

That about wraps up the
unofficial Wayne Fiscus tour.

I guess I did present a pretty bleak
picture of what goes on around here.

There are some good things to be
said for working in a hospital.

If you have a heart attack, you
are only a gurney away from the CCU.

We're in the business
of saving lives.

I guess that makes all the other
stuff a little more than tolerable.

See you tomorrow.

One more thing.

No matter how bad I made it seem
today, it's going to get worse.

Jack, the world is overrun with
babies who shouldn't be here

cos there's not enough food to eat!

I keep talking about us and you keep
talking about zero population growth!

I can't believe that a man of
your education could be so blind.

This isn't going to be some child who
is unloved or unwanted or neglected.

Let's just drop it.

There is nothing you can say
that's going to change my mind!

I want to marry you.

Marry me?

Yeah.

That's very sweet, but no way.

Why?

Because we've only known each other
two months.

I promised myself I wouldn't get
married until I left grad school.

I haven't had a chance to embarrass
myself in front of your parents yet.

I love you, Clancy.

That still doesn't change anything.

I'm not going to have this baby.

I can't believe you can be
so unfeeling or uncaring.

Just stop it, OK?

You're supposed to help me through
this, not think of yourself.

Maybe we should just
stop seeing each other.

When are you having
the procedure done?

Next Wednesday.

Well, I'm not on call.
I would like to be there.

I would like that, too.

Next time I get involved with a guy,

I'm gonna make sure he's
got an air conditioner.

See you, Boomer.

PHONE RINGS

Hello.

No, you've got the wrong number.
This is 634. Yeah.

Huh? No, no, no problem.

What's for dinner?

I'm not disturbing you?

No, just collecting my thoughts.
I don't spend a lot of time here.

You have a nice chapel.
You ought to use it.

I'm afraid it makes me uneasy.

Same way I feel about hospitals.
Thanks for coming down.

You know, Sister, I have
to tell you something.

You don't strike me as
the head of a religious order.

Too young? Yeah.

It's funny. Most laymen's concept
about the Catholic religion

begins with the Flying Nun
and ends with Ingrid Bergman.

I went to a Jesuit high school.

And lived to tell about it?

Well, I learned a lot.
How to use my mind.

It's come in handy over the years.

I wasn't a model student.

They broke more than one ruler
trying to teach me discipline.

Sometimes, we have to bend to
the will of a higher authority.

Especially when that will
is different from our own.

You'd be amazed how much
the Church has changed.

Much less rigid. The people, too.

That's why I love
working with Sister Teresa.

You should see her with those kids.

She always says, if you want
to understand the world better,

try looking at it through
the eyes of a child.

An extraordinary gift.

Sister, Dr Muhlmeister
has confirmed my diagnosis.

Then turn off the machines.

I can't do that.

Let her die, Dr Westphall.

I don't think that's your decision.

Who better to make it? Her family.

I am her family. Her real family.

Sister, I don't mean any disrespect,

but this hospital can't
accept the responsibility...

I want those machines turned off.

If you won't do it voluntary,
I'll find some way to force you.

You have no right to play God
with another person's life.