Sorry for Your Loss (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 5 - 17 Unheard Messages - full transcript

- My husband died for nothing.

Do you know
your husband's passcode

to his phone?
- Of course.

- Jesus.

- If I were to ask
eight-year-old Matt

what he really wanted,
what would he say?

- I wanted to make comic books.

- This is amazing.

- That day Rogue died...

it was the day after Christmas,
right?

That was the day



that he knew
he was gonna marry you.

- 12-26.

I think there was
a lot about him I didn't know.

- Hey, I'm just running
to the grocery store.

Can you let me know
if there's anything

you want me to get?

I hope you're having
a nice hike. Bye.

So why is Raskolnikov
so concerned

for his sister's safety here?

Is it because Vin Diesel
told him

the most important thing
is family

and then drove off

in a $1/2 million car?

Guys, we have six weeks left.



Way too early
to check out like this.

I mean, come on.
Give me... give me something

before the period ends.

No, wait, hold up.

Hold up.
How about this?

Read the first six chapters,

and if you're still
this bored,

we'll find something
more exciting,

and we'll swap out

Robert Frost
for Kendrick Lamar.

But you have
to really read it,

or do a way better job
faking it.

All right.

- Hey,
I'm, uh, checking out

so if there's anything
you want, let me know.

Okay, I guess you're not
getting service yet.

You ready?

- I can't decide
what shirt to wear.

- Aren't all men's shirts
the same shirt?

Well, you look good
in all of these.

How about this one?
This is fun.

Hi.
Can you please call me back?

I am starting to worry.

Um...

Please just give me a call
so I know you're okay.

Love you. Bye.

- What if art becomes
like the 24-hour news cycle?

When everything
comes out quick,

it has the shelf life
of a gallon of milk.

What if we end up living
in a world of first drafts?

- Really?
- What?

- You were weird at the party,

you didn't say a word
in the car ride home,

and now you want to go
straight to bed.

- I'm tired.
- Everyone is tired.

It's Friday.

You completely shut down.

- Oh, because I didn't want
to laugh at Rob's jokes?

He said he was so impressed
with my self-sacrifice

in being a teacher.

- I can't believe he gave you
a compliment.

What a sociopath.

- He's in finance.
It was a dig

about how little I make, Leigh.

- Why do you have to run
every nice thing

someone says to you
through the Matt Machine

to figure out
how it's secretly an insult?

- Maybe because
I'm just not interested

in laughing at unfunny jokes

and pretending to be interested
in lame stories.

- You could've stayed home
if you didn't want to go.

- Yeah, really?
You would've let me stay home?

- I get that you're going
through a hard time right now.

I... I just thought

that going out
might make you feel better.

- Yeah, going out doesn't
do that for me, Leigh.

- Well, sometimes,
you're...

sure that you won't have fun,

and then you do,

and... then you're glad
you went, sometimes.

But what never makes you
feel better

is lying in bed all day.

- You know, what also
never makes me feel better

is when my wife yells at me.

- I'm not yelling.

- It's hard to figure out
what book

might keep
my students awake

when I keep getting push alerts

that the world
is going to hell,

and with summer coming up,

I'll have even more time
to spiral out like this.

- You feel like your medication
has stopped working?

I have thought loops
that I can't stop, so yeah.

- Happens.

We've reached
the maximum dose with this one.

We'll try another.
Have you tried Sertraline?

- Not yet.
You know,

every time I cycle
onto something new,

I've... I end up crying
at dog food commercials.

- You know that's temporary.

I'll send the prescription
in today.

Let's talk more about summer.

Ideally,
what does this break look like?

- Um, well, I...
I want to exercise more,

uh, and meditate.
Um...

And Leigh's dad and stepmom

gave us this gift certificate

to some... hotel
in Palm Springs.

- That real life or ideal life?

- Uh, both,

um, though it's 110 degrees
in the summer,

so probably ideal fall.

Um, and I know Leigh
would love it

if I finished my...
my comic book.

- Leigh would love it?

- I might want to finish it.

Um...

Yeah, I mean... you know,

it's a comic
that I wanna read,

so I wanna create it.

- Just so you can read it?
Only you?

- Oh, boy.
I...

I want... I want... yeah.

I want everyone to read it.

Why is that so hard to say?

- Say it again,
even if it's hard.

- Okay, I want everyone
to read it.

I want... I want everyone
to read it.

Um, I...

I want it to get published.

I want...

I wanna...
I wanna see it

on my favorite shelf

in my favorite
comic book store.

I... I want some kid
who's like I was

to pick it up and...

and... and, uh...

And... and love it so much

they make their friends
read it.

- So you'll finish it
this summer.

- Uh, y... um, it's not
just finishing it,

which I'm actually
pretty close to.

It's... it's telling people
about it.

I... I have to pitch my book

with my online portfolio,
which I... I set up...

last year, and you're now

the second person
in the world

who knows it exists,

and... and if I do all that,

well, what if
it gets published?

- Matt...

What about success
frightens you?

What if it gets published,

and...

it doesn't make me
feel better?

I mean, if...

If that doesn't work,

then I don't think
anything could.

I just don't know
what else to try.

- I think you do.

I think we listed

a whole bunch
of things to try.

Where are you?

Uh, did you forget
to charge your phone again?

'Cause I got you
that new charger

for your car,

and, uh, here it is
on your drafting table.

Cool.

- Oh, my God.

What time is it?

I'm supposed
to teach at 8:00.

- Leigh's already there.

- Okay, on a scale of

"We'll laugh
about this someday"

to "my sister is dead to me,"

how mad is she?

- Uh, she was in the
"I'm not saying anything,

but I'm sighing
really loudly" range.

- That's not good.

Whatever.

She always judges people.

It's like the smokescreen
she uses

so that she doesn't have to
work on her own problems.

- Oh, you're in trouble
right now,

so I'm not gonna
agree with you.

Hope whatever happened
last night was worth it.

- Oh, it was.

The family my friend Kristin
nannys for

went out of town
for the weekend,

so we raided
their wine cellar

and went skinny-dipping
in their infinity pool,

uh, but then Kristin
fell asleep inside the house

with all of our stuff
and we were all locked outside.

All I had was my phone, so...

I threw an inflatable pool toy

over my naked body

and took a Lyft here.

The Lyft driver said
that the next time

anyone asks her
for her craziest story,

she's going to tell mine.

What?

- Just think about

what you could accomplish

if you took all that energy
you put into partying

and funneled it literally
into anything else.

Thanks for the lecture, Dad,

but I'm fine.

I have a job,
my mom makes me pay rent...

- Okay, but what
about the future?

- Uh, I mean,
I think it's unstoppable,

but until it comes,

I'm going to continue

giving Lyft drivers
their best stories.

- Okay, clearly,
I'm not getting through.

This is the decade
where you build your life.

What do you want to build,
Jules?

Who do you want to be?

- Yeah, okay.

I can't wait
for you to screw up,

so you can call me,

and I can ask you,

"Who do you want to be?"

but for now, I'm going
to make us some pancakes,

so you can stop
questioning my life choices.

Blueberry?

- Okay.

- Cool.

- And send.

Yo, bro, talk to your wife.

She's, like, freaking out

'cause you haven't
called her back.

Text her you're okay,
so she can stop calling me.

Thanks.

- Hi, honey.
It's Mom.

I want to get you guys
over for dinner.

Can you and Leigh
do Sunday night?

Let me know.
Love you.

Dude, dude, dude,
you are never gonna believe

what just...

okay, wait, hold on.

Hold on, wait.
Whoa, whoa.

W-what happened?

Man,

she said I was too defensive,

but obviously,
I'm gonna be defensive

when she's always
criticizing me,

and she had already
broken up with me

at this point, by the way.

So I'm like,

"Why am I still getting
yelled at

when you're already done?"

- She was still yelling because

she still wants to work it out
between you guys,

and as long as you insist

on being right
about everything,

you're never gonna be
in a relationship

that lasts longer
than six months.

That's amazing.

How does Leigh get her voice

to come out of your mouth
like that?

- It's not funny.
- It is.

Actually, it is.

- You know, Mom let you
get away with everything,

and it created
unrealistic expectations

for how a woman
would treat you.

- You obviously got that
from therapy.

- No, I get a lot from it,
actually.

- Mm, maybe I can use some

to help me get over
this breakup.

- No, you don't need therapy
for that.

Y-you're supposed to feel bad
when you get dumped.

You should go to therapy
about Mom, though.

You really think I have
unrealistic expectations?

Man, all I want is a girl...

Who will laugh really hard
at my jokes

and to make me laugh
really hard back.

- There was a study

that looked at people

who won the lottery

and people
who had an accident,

became paraplegics,
quadriplegics,

and...

pretty soon,

they were about as happy

as they were before the lottery

or the accident,

so they came up with this idea

of a happiness set point.

However happy you were,
no matter what happened,

after a momentary spike
or dip,

that's about as happy
as you'll always be.

- So I'm just gonna
keep talking about Kyra,

and you're
just gonna keep talking

about some article you read.
- I'm saying,

you're a relatively happy
person.

You were happy
before you met Kyra,

and you'll be happy
again soon.

- Okay.

Okay, thanks.

- You know,
the really crazy thing is,

after the study,
the lead researcher

jumped off of a building.

What do you think
my sober set point is?

I think I should spike it soon.

Good?
- Yeah.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

- I love you, man.
- I love you, too.

- I don't know why
I'm still calling you

if your phone's dead,

Matt, if you are ignoring me,

I am going to be so pissed.

Please call me.

Call me, call me,
call me, call me,

call me, call me,
call me, call me.

Call me, call me, call me.

Oh, my... wait, oh, shit,

I'm getting
another call.

Uh, Oh, God,
I hope this is you.

- What are you doing?

- I was waiting until I was
okay to drive, Leigh.

- I thought
you were dead.

- No, no.

- You can't die.

- I won't.

- No, I'm... I'm, like, never.

I think
I might have to someday.

Just do it after me.

- Okay.

It's okay.

Hey, hey.

Hey.

Hey, it's okay, I'm here.

- This is
your local Rite Aid Pharmacy.

Your prescription
is ready for pickup.

- This is
your local Rite Aid Pharmacy.

Your prescription
will be available

for three more days.

- This is
your local Rite Aid Pharmacy.

Your prescription
has been canceled.

Please call
your doctor's office.

- I think that's better
than a coffee.

You're welcome.

- Did you cum?

- Um, no, I don't think...

uh, I don't think
it's gonna happen today.

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, I think it's just
a possible side effect

of the medication
I'm taking.

- You do...

seem like you're...
a little better, I think.

- Well, I read somewhere
that sometimes,

your body feels it
before your head does.

- I wish I had
a better understanding

of what you're going through.
- Oh, it's hard to describe.

- You're an English teacher.

Give me a metaphor.
- I don't know!

- I read an article

that said it's like a...

like a fog
descending over everything.

- Like that?

- Kind of.

- Please just tell me

if there's anything

I can do to help.

- Oh, yeah.

- Anything.

Even if it's giving you space,

which, you know,
is the hardest thing

you could ask me to do.

But I love you that much.

- That is what I need.

- Then...

I can start by
taking a shower,

and that will buy you
ten minutes.

Mm, twenty-five.

- Hey, it's, uh...
it's Danny.

I, uh...

I do... I don't know why

I even called you.
I...

You're never even gonna get
this message.

Yeah.

I guess I just wanted
to hear your voice.

This is weird.

Sorry.

Um...

I was procrastinating
the other day

and I was flipping
through my phone,

and I found this old
credit card bill

I hadn't paid.

Um, I donated to this thing.

The last male
northern white rhino was sick.

And I hid the emails

because I didn't want Leigh
to find out about it,

and I guess I forgot to pay it.

W... anyway, um...

I hadn't heard
about the rhino,

so I looked him up,

and it turns out he died.

Months ago, actually.

Um...

The whole world just
didn't care about him.

We killed off
every single creature like him,

and now he's gone.

- Why don't you want Leigh
to know?

- Uh, because I always donate

to bummer things like that,

and I shouldn't
be spending the money,

and e... I'll... I'll just put
the credit card

in the freezer.
- Why can't you...

just tell Leigh about it?

- She doesn't know
what it's really like.

She thinks it's like a fog,

because someone
described it like that

in an article or something,

but that's... that's not
how it feels to me.

- What does it feel like
for you?

- The opposite.

It feels like a bracing wind

that blows...
blows the fog away

and reveals the whole truth

of the world underneath,
and it's...

Everyone else is in the fog.
They can't see it, but I can,

and it's all ugly
and hopeless.

- Is that
the depression talking?

- No, no, it's me talking.

- The disease

makes you see the world
that way.

- No, the disease
isn't dangerous

because it tells me lies.

The disease is dangerous
because it tells me the truth.

- Matt...

You have to open yourself up

to the possibility

that you can be happy.

- I was thinking
about this time

we were driving to Vegas.

I was sleeping, and...

you woke me up
because there was actually

a tumbleweed blowing by,

and you knew
it would make me laugh.

And I did.

I laughed so hard.
It...

- Matt Greer?

- Not saying
I don't... laugh anymore,

but... not like you
made me laugh.

- Sorry I'm late, but I swear,

being an editor's like being
a firefighter on the Sun,

which is why it's so nice

when I get
to make someone's day.

Here's the deal:

You're a better writer
than artist,

and there's a few key panels

I want you to take
another crack at,

and obviously, you gotta finish
that last chapter,

but I know you can get there.
- Uh, sure.

- Sorry. I'm totally
burying the lede here.

We're gonna publish you.

- We just gotta nail those
last few pages and I'm...

Congratulations, Matt.

Welcome to the club.

Matt, dude.
Joe Tsang.

It's been three weeks.
Where'd you go?

I've been emailing you.
Hit me back.

- Hey.
- Hey.

- What's going on?

- It's Jules.
Her car

quote-unquote broke down
in Victorville,

so I'm not... I'm not
gonna make it for dinner.

- Uh, then don't give it
a second thought.

Just go do
what you've gotta do.

- You're the greatest.
I'm so sorry.

I'll make it up to you
tomorrow.

- No, don't... don't... I...

Yeah, you better.

Hey, I'll see you later, okay?

- Okay, I love you.
- Yeah, love you too.

Bye.

- I went
for a hike today.

What do you think of that?

I'm at the spot where, um...

Anyway, I'm looking
straight down

the side of this cliff, man.
It's no joke.

But I guess
you already knew that.

Was it muddy up there?

You never replaced
those raggedy-ass boots,

did you?

I'm just trying
to understand...

what happened,
since you can't

explain it to me.

Those last few seconds

on the way down,

what was going
through your head?

Where are you going?

- I'm gonna go
for a hike.

- I'm gonna come with you.

Just give me ten minutes
to get ready.

And three more hours
to sleep.

- You were up all night.
It's okay.

- Mm, okay.

I love you.

- I love you too.

- You've done
that hike a hundred times,

and I've done it with you
at least 20.

I want to believe
this was an accident,

but I'm standing here,
looking down,

and... I just don't know.

- I think I want a party.
- You do?

- I do.
- A party?

- Mm-hmm. Like a big party.

- Okay.

- Leigh, I've been trying
to give you

your column back for months.

- I-I know you waited on me,
and the good news is,

is that I'm done
putting my life on hold

and I'm ready to do this.

- Are you okay?

You've invited 657 people
to my house tonight.

- Well, it's a last-minute
invite on a Tuesday.

If 30 people show up, it's
gonna be a Christmas miracle.

- No. Shit.