Solsidan (2010–…): Season 1, Episode 9 - Midsommarfest - full transcript

Breathe in through your nose and...

out through your mouth.

Then the whole face relaxes.
That's the point.

This doesn't feel good.

I should have pulled down the blinds,
People might think we're hippies.

Pinch my leg, and I'll see if I can
breathe myself through the pain.

Here?
-Yes.

But you're going to have to pinch harder.

Alex, you're going to have to put your back into it.
-Harder?

Yes, a child is going out of my vagina.
It hurts. Let's go!

What the hell are you doing!



I was supposed to pinch harder.
-Well don't rip half my leg off!

You said pinch harder.
-You don't have to pinch like this, do you?

Breathe your way through the pain.
You'll see, it's easy.

I was on a respiratory retreat in Sri Lanka,
it was fucking awesome.

I learned how to get in a trance
with the help of breathing.

And a hefty spacecake, perhaps?

In the villages, women only have
breathing as a painkiller.

Must be really hard
to find epidurals in the villages there.

Have you talked to Fredde about
Midsummer and Ove and Anette?

No, I haven't.
-They're counting on celebrating with us.

You told them that.
-Told them...

I said it might be a good idea
if we celebrated together, possibly.

I said it could be.
But now it's not that great of an idea.

Who's Ove?
-Alex's best friend. They're twin souls.



A bit like Tjorven and B?tsman,
you could say.

Which one am I?
-B?tsman.

More like Uncle Melker,
I'd say.

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Don't tickle!
Not now, I'm not in the mood.

When will you be?

We're watching "Home Makeover",
We'll see later.

You have to actively work a
for a good sex life.

Have you read Amelia again?
-On the toilet.

But you're right,
of course we're going to...

No! Brown corduroy on the walls?
That's insane.

I'm sorry, darling.
We're going to do it. Soon.

New shoes?
-Yes. Same as Federer.

Gas sole in it, I can regulate the pressure.
On gravel, I do 2 kilobars.

Well, hey!
-Hi there!

Don't say anything about Midsummer.
-Is that Edberg and Wilander?

I'm glad I caught you, Alex.
We were talking about Midsummer.

Yes, that's right.
But shouldn't we think on it a bit?

It's the day after tomorrow.
-Well, it's starting to...

Fredde, what are you doing for Midsummer?
-We're going to the country.

Why don't we join you?
-Well...yes...

Good! What do you say, Alex?
Let's join Fredde and Mickan.

Yes, but is that such a good idea?

It's quite crowded.
There's not a single bed left free.

No problem for us,
we can sleep on the floor.

You don't have to worry about that.
You've done the dirty work.

Not me though, I got a free pass.

We'll bring sleeping mats.
Anything else?

Eel.
-Eel?

Yes, bring three, four eels. Smoked.
From the Hall.

Okay, eel... Great, guys!
Keep going!

I'll see you later!
Have a good time!

Do you like eel?
-No, but it's expensive. It will sting.

Hi!
-Hi!

Am I interrupting?
-No, it's okay.

Hi! Mickan.
-Palle, Anna's brother.

For Midsummer, is herring okay?
-Absolutely.

Don't you think herring is overrated?
Do you like herring?

Yes.
-You wouldn't say so when you look at you.

You don't look like a herring person.
Oh no? What does that look like?

Alex is a typical herring man.
He's got that herring-like look.

Yes, in fact, he has.
-Yes, maybe.

Should we buy something else?
-No. We'll buy Lebanese, too.

Wonderful! I love hommos.

Not gays, of course, but chickpea paste.

Do you mind gays?
-No, I have a lot of gay friends.

But it's women I love.
And chickpea paste.

Well... What to do on Midsummer,
besides eating 'hommos'?

You're welcome to join us.
-Yes, come.

But you're going to Gothenburg.
-I can change that.

What fun, let's do it.
Welcome.

Hello! Hey, everybody!
-Hi!

Take this, Alex.
Where are the groceries?

I don't know, in the car?
Did you leave those?

I wasn't able to carry everything.

What boat do you take?
The fastest or the one with the best-looking women?

Ours is the fastest.
-Perfect, then I don't have to choose.

Hey, Palle, take this...

Could you help me down?
-Take this, too.

What are you wearing, then?
-I've got a lot over there.

Is anyone helping me down?
-Absolutely, I'll help you.

Can I hold your hand?
Oh my God!

Take the rest there before you jump down.

Hey, Ove!
-Hey, Anna! That's nice!

It's coming together.

I can feel him,
I'm little sore in the stomach.

To think, in there lies a little
human who will soon see the light of day.

What a miracle!
-Yes, that's it.

Now I'm going to get in the boat, Ove.
-I'll see you later.

Is there something?
-I'm being squeezed all the time.

I'm going to have to start charging for it soon.

Squeeze a stomach here.
10 kronor per squeeze.

Wait, baby.

A good thing about being pregnant
is that you don't have to carry anything.

Not carry anything?
Then what's this?

You think that...
-I'm not doing anything but carry!

I can take your bags too.
-I was just kidding.

You weren't.

You know what it weighs? 20 kilos!
-I'm only up 14.

14 kilos. What you wear weighs a maximum of two.
-It weighs a little more, but...

Don't start arguing about that too!
-Please, she's pregnant. Don't you get it.

I think I get it now.

Hey, yes!

This room was free, so we got in here.

Mickan and I sleep here.

But now we've started unpacking so...
Is it okay?

I thought you were going to bring a sleeping mat.
-Yes, but we forgot about them.

We forgot sheets, too. It's very, very sad.
Can I take this, or what?

There is room in the guest house.

With Anette's urinary tract infection
it's good to be close to the bathroom.

I'll run around and pee the whole night,
so it's better for you, too.

And we have Marielle.
There can be several diaper changes per night.

We have toddlers, too.
-Great kids.

In any case.
Is it okay for us to be here, then?

Mom! We're going to sleep in the boat house.
-We are?

That fucking Ove and his fucking wife!

I prepared my own herring.
Some lemon and orange.

And here's a Martini Italian ice tea
for you, Luz.

Hey, hello!

That's good! You brought eel, didn't you?
-We couldn't get hold of any.

They didn't have it at Lidl.

We bought herring instead.
Lidl's own. Delicious.

Kn?ckebr?d and salt.

And Ove has shopped for
drinks as well.

We usually celebrate at Anette's
parents' house in Hunnebostrand.

We were there the first time in 2003.
In 2004 we were also in Hunnebostrand.

What happened?

My back.
-Should I call someone?

No! Just give me five seconds.

Anyway, in 2004 and 2005, we were in
Borgholm, 2006 in Hunnebostrand.

2007 was also in Hunnebostrand.
Hey, I lied to you.

In 2005 Borgholm,
2004 Hunnebostrand.

2006 back in Hunnebostrand again,
2007 Hunnebostrand.

I'm having a hard time keeping the years apart.

2008 Hunnebostrand
and in 2009, we're here.

Salt stick?
-No, thank you.

You're getting really big now.
-Yes, precisely...

Awesome!

Does he move a lot?
-Actually, it's a little girl.

It's a typical boy's belly you have.

But they said on the ultrasound
that it was a girl.

That's a boy's belly.
Pointed, forward. A typical boy's belly.

With that stomach shape...
Now I don't want to scare you.

But childbirth won't be easy.
Cilla was such a belly.

And it wasn't a cakewalk,
but I won't go into any details.

No, thank you.
-It took 34 hours.

That's all I can say.
I tore from north to south.

It was like a baboon's ass,
completely inside out.

It never completely healed.
-No, no, it didn't, no...

What if I had a little schnaps
on a string inside my throat?

I would pull it up and down
so it felt like much, much more

What if I had a little schnaps
on a string inside my throat?

Happy Midsummer!

That's a nice song.
-I think Churchill said...

that really good champagne
should be free.

There were two other things as well.
-Wasn't it 'dry' and 'cold'?

Yes, but 'free'
is just too damn good.

Anybody want salt?
Will you pass on the salt?

Could you pass the herring, darling?

The children need to find their own peaceful place.

Do you have a minute? Can we...?
There's something I want to take with you.

We don't have to do that now, do we?
-Yes, I'd love to now.

Can you talk to Palle?
-What should I tell him?

He's hitting on Mickan!
-He's not.

He's touching her all over the place,
traceing her hands and...

Traceing hands is something he does
all the time, with everyone.

Are you ashamed of him?
-Yes, when he does this.

Are you ashamed of me, too?
-No.

You know what I'm doing now?
Stop!

Palle and me are getting a taxi,
so you can relax.

So you don't have to take responsibility for others.
-Honey...

Sorry!

What the hell?

Palle's fucking screwed!

Stop this shit right now!

What the hell! Alex!
-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.

How do you close?
-What the fuck?

The curtain is pinched in there.
-Piss off!

What the hell,
I can't even get laid?

Yes, come on.

No, I can't now.
I'm completely out of it.

Fuck!
-I still have to pick some strawberries.

What's so great about Cuba?
-Cuba is...

It's hard to put into words.
Cuba must be experienced with all senses.

You have to be there.
The sounds, the flavors, the smells, the people.

Communists.
-But they have warmth, joy of life.

And the share everything.
The bread, the wine, even the love.

Exciting.
-Spanish has no word for infidelity.

Are you a communist, too?
He talks like one, dresses like one.

What's this communist hat?

Was it braided by communists
in some cigar factory there?

They say you should share love.
"Compartir amor", isn't that beautiful.

Listen to that, "compartir amor".
But love, I guess...

...is one of those things where,
the more you give away...

...the more you get back?
-Exactly. That's what they say in Cuba.

I knew there was
a Cuban in here.

You're both communists.

I was wrong about Palle.
He's a hell of a guy.

Yes, but he can be a pain in the ass.

How do you feel, sweetheart?
-It's hurting a bit down here.

Hey, there!

What a day!
-Yes, it's great.

Now it's getting
really big, that.

Can I feel it?
I love these big bellies.

There's only a placenta left in there.
The baby was born a week ago.

The placenta hasn't come out.
-I'm sorry, I thought...

But feel it, damn it!
Feel! God!

Squeeze it, and I'm sure
you'll see a placenta before dawn.

I was going to get a drink.
Do you want anything?

No, thank you.
-A stainless steel bowl.

I can put it between my legs
in case it falls out.

Stop it!
You're scaring the shit out of him.

I can't take it anymore.

Hey, man!

And his woman!

Jokes aside,
have you talked to that Palle?

What about him?

You can tell he's not from
Saltis. How did he sneak in here?

And he seems like a communist.
That's what I told him.

Palle is my brother, Ove.
-Well! Is he a communist?

He hasn't snuck in.
Mickan invited him.

Unlike you.
You haven't contributed shit.

I beg to differ.

With herring, kn?ckebr?d,
salt, salty sticks.

Without us, it wouldn't have
become any kind of fucking party here.

Shut up!
You're not going to talk shit about Palle.

Darling...
-No, I want to say this.

No, he's not from Saltis, and no,
he's not as wealthy as everyone else.

So you call him a communist!
What the fuck is that?

You're going to apologize!
-Okay. Sorry.

Not to me, to him.
-To him. Okay.

Yes, go and do it. Now!
-I will. Now.

Now!
-I'll do it.

And you're going to mean it too!

Shit, you don't have to start crying,
Tear up heaven and earth like that.

What the hell?

Howdy!
-Hey, hey...

Hey you.

I want to apologize for
calling you a communist.

It's all right.
-I just wanted to sort that out.

Okay.
-Have you seen Anette?

No, I've had my hands full here.

She's asleep.
The bore.

Not very warm now.
-No, it's a little cold.

You have a nice evening.
-You too, Ove.

Here.
I've been doing some reconnaissance.

It's a little slippery.

What is it?
-My back!

I've got back pains.

Wait!
Take it easy, damn it!

Go on!
You're standing where I'm going!

Damn, it hurts!

It's easier if you...
It's easier if you're quiet!

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