Soap (1977–1981): Season 1, Episode 16 - Episode #1.16 - full transcript
Corinne meets her real mother, Ingrid Svenson, for the very first time; still vengeful at the loss of her child, Ingrid has hired a German detective whose abrasive nature rubs Benson the wrong way; and Chief of Police Tinkler gathers enough evidence to arrest Jessica for Peter's murder.
ON THE LAST EPISODE OF SOAP,
A SURPRISED CORINNE
WAS BOOKED FOR THE MURDER
OF PETER CAMPBELL.
BUT THIS IS NOTHING
COMPARED TO THE SURPRISE
IN STORE FOR HER
WHEN SHE FINDS OUT
THAT A SWEDISH LADY,
INGRID SVENSON,
HAS COME FROM ECUADOR
TO PAY CORINNE
A SURPRISE VISIT,
AND HAS SHOWN
A SURPRISED
CHIEF TINKLER PROOF
THAT SHE IS
CORINNE'S REAL MOTHER.
SURPRISED?
YOU WON'T BE AFTER
THIS EPISODE OF...
THIS IS
THE STORY OF 2 SISTERS,
JESSICA TATE
AND MARY CAMPBELL.
THESE ARE THE TATES,
AND THESE ARE THE CAMPBELLS.
AND THIS IS...
OH, MA. DADDY.
OH, BABY.
BABY, THE BAIL WILL
BE HERE ANY MINUTE.
OH, GOOD.
I CANNOT BELIEVE
THESE ACCOMMODATIONS.
WELL, I MEAN, CHESTER,
NO WONDER PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS
TRYING TO BREAK OUT
OF PLACES LIKE THIS.
OH. CHESTER.
LOOK AT THAT.
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT?
I SEE IT, JESSICA.
IT'S A TOILET.
I KNOW WHAT IT IS.
IT'S RIGHT IN
THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM.
HOW DO THEY EXPECT
ANYBODY TO USE THAT?
JESSICA, IF YOU'RE SERVING
A 10-YEAR SENTENCE,
EVENTUALLY YOU HAVE TO.
LOOK AT THIS.
YOU POOR CHILD.
SHUT UP IN THIS CELL
WITHOUT ANY SUNSHINE,
HUNDREDS OF FEET
BELOW THE EARTH.
THE CHAINS OF PRISONERS
CLANKING IN THE NIGHT.
THE MUSTY SMELL
OF THE WET STONES,
AND THE SOUND
OF SCAMPERING RATS
ACROSS THE FLOOR AT NIGHT.
JESSICA.
HUH?
CORINNE IS IN
A CONNECTICUT JAIL.
SHE'S NOT
THE PRISONER OF ZENDA.
CORINNE?
I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU.
BAIL?
NO, BETTER.
CORINNE, CORINNE, CORINNE.
OH, MY GOD!
WHO IS THIS?
CORINNE, CORINNE, CORINNE.
WHO IS THIS?
WHO ARE YOU?
WHO AM I?
YES, WHO ARE YOU?
HA!
WHO IS THIS?
23 YEARS.
FOR 23 YEARS
I'VE BEEN IN ECUADOR.
AND FOR 23 YEARS
I'VE HATED YOU!
JESSICA,
WHO IS THIS PERSON?
LOOK AT HER.
LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE.
IT WASN'T BAD ENOUGH
YOU TOOK HER AWAY FROM ME,
BUT LOOK AT HOW
YOU BROUGHT HER UP
TO BE IN JAIL.
OH, MY GOD.
IT'S HER.
RIGHT. THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER
SEE ME AGAIN, DID YOU?
HA!
M-MOTHER,
WHO IS THIS WOMAN?
DARLING,
I AM YOUR MOTHER.
OH.
SHERIFF,
GET HER OUT OF HERE.
SHE'S NUTS!
SHE'S GOT
DOCUMENTS.
AND SHE CERTAINLY
KNOWS YOUR NAME.
SHE SAYS SHE'S MY MOTHER.
SHE'S NOT MY MOTHER.
THIS IS MY MOTHER.
MOTHER?
HMM?
MOTHER, FOR GOD'S SAKE,
TELL ME WHO THIS IS.
UH, CORINNE,
THIS IS INGRID SVENSON.
INGRID,
THIS IS CORINNE.
CORINNE, CORINNE, CORINNE.
SHE SAYS
SHE'S MY MOTHER!
YES, SHE DID SAY THAT,
DIDN'T SHE?
WELL, WHO IS SHE?
SHE IS YOUR MOTHER.
WHO'S MY MOTHER?
SHE'S YOUR MOTHER.
WHICH SHE?
THAT SHE.
THIS SHE?
THAT SHE.
INGRID'S
MY MOTHER?
YES. IT'S A LONG STORY,
CORINNE.
CORINNE,
CORINNE, CORINNE.
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?
YOU NEVER TOLD ME.
HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME?
WELL,
WE THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER KNOW.
I WANT YOU TO GO, NOW!
CORINNE, WE WERE
TRYING TO PROTECT YOU.
I SAID, "GO."
CORINNE,
I LOVE YOU.
SHE WANTS YOU
TO GO.
DOES SHE HAVE
TO SPIT AT YOU?
CORINNE,
IF YOU HAD BEEN
OUR OWN CHILD,
WE COULDN'T HAVE
LOVED YOU ANY MORE.
SHERIFF,
GET 'EM OUT OF HERE.
OK. IT'S, UH,
IT'S TIME. LET'S GO.
COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON.
LET'S GO. LET'S GO.
LET'S GO.
HA!
MY LITTLE GIRL.
DON'T WORRY.
WE'LL GET YOU OUT OF HERE.
I HIRED A DETECTIVE,
AND WE GET YOU OUT OF HERE.
AND THEN WE GET
A PLACE TOGETHER,
AND GET TO KNOW
EACH OTHER ALL OVER AGAIN.
NOW, LET MOTHER LOOK
AT HOW PRETTY YOU ARE.
SO, NOW, TELL MOTHER,
WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING
THE LAST 23 YEARS?
I SAID, "QUIET,"
BOB.
YOU BE QUIET.
I'M HAPPY FOR A CHANGE.
BURT,
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THAT?
PETER'S BATHTUB.
I'VE GOT THE REST OUTSIDE.
BOY, I'VE HEARD OF SOUVENIRS,
BUT THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
BURT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING
WITH PETER'S BATHTUB?
WHY NOT?
PETER DOESN'T NEED IT ANYMORE.
IN THIS TUB
IS THE ANSWER.
I KNOW THAT IT'S HERE.
IT'S HERE.
THE MURDERER LEFT HIS TRACE
RIGHT IN THERE,
OR OUT THERE WITH
ONE OF THE OTHER PIECES.
I THOUGHT YOU SAID
CORINNE DID IT?
UH, NOT NECESSARILY.
HEY, EVERYBODY.
HEY, LISTEN, THERE'S
THIS HUGE CHUNK OF BATHTUB
LAYING OUT IN THE PATH.
SOMEBODY COULD
KILL THEMSELVES ON IT.
YEAH,
SOMEBODY ALREADY DID.
DANNY,
WHERE'S YOUR DISGUISE?
WELL, UH, I DON'T THINK
I'M GONNA NEED IT ANYMORE.
I FOUND SOMEBODY
WHO'S GONNA HELP ME OUT.
OH, TOO BAD.
MRS. CAMPBELL?
YES.
I AM HEINRICH HIMMEL,
A PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR HIRED
BY CORINNE TATE'S MOTHER.
MAY I COME IN?
YES.
I THINK YOU SHOULD KNOW
THAT THERE IS A BROKEN BATHTUB
ON YOUR LAWN,
AND IT LOOKS DISGUSTING.
WELL, THAT'S MINE.
I'LL GET IT.
HALT!
I DIDN'T KNOW JESSICA HAD
HIRED A PRIVATE DETECTIVE.
SHE DIDN'T.
BUT YOU SAID...
I SAID,
"CORINNE TATE'S MOTHER."
INGRID SVENSON.
INGRID SVENSON?
INGRID SVENSON.
QUIET!
ENOUGH.
MRS. INGRID SVENSON.
NOW, MRS. CAMPBELL,
I HAVE QUESTIONS
AND YOU WILL GIVE ANSWERS.
MAKE THEM BRIEF,
NO LONG, BORING STORIES,
WHICH YOU AMERICANS
SEEM SO BENT ON TELLING.
WHO IS THIS
INGRID SVENSON?
WHAT DID I SAY?
WHAT DID YOU
JUST HEAR ME SAY?
I'LL TELL YOU LATER.
TELL THEM NOW.
THEY'LL NEVER SHUT UP
IF YOU DON'T TELL THEM NOW.
BUT QUICK.
A QUICK, SHORT STORY.
NO DETAILS.
UNDERSTAND?
NO DETAILS.
MACHT SCHNELL!
SIT. SIT. SIT.
WELL, JESSICA AND I
HAD A BROTHER, RANDOLPH.
YOU NEVER TOLD ME
YOU HAD A BROTHER.
SHUT UP.
SHE'S TELLING YOU NOW.
WELL, UH, RANDOLPH
TOOK A LIKING TO INGRID,
OUR SWEDISH MAID.
SEE, INGRID
DIDN'T SPEAK ANY ENGLISH,
SO SHE DIDN'T KNOW
RANDOLPH WAS PECULIAR.
DETAILS.
THOSE ARE DETAILS.
WE DON'T CARE ABOUT PECULIAR.
YOU ARE ALL PECULIAR.
ANYWAY,
INGRID GOT PREGNANT
AND HAD CORINNE.
NOW, MOTHER
WANTED THE BABY,
SO SHE VERY CLEVERLY
OFFERED TO BABY-SIT,
AND THEN SHE SENT INGRID
AND RANDOLPH TO ECUADOR...
DETAILS!
MORE DETAILS!
HUT, HUT, HUT,
HUT, HUT, HUT.
SHE TOLD THE AUTHORITIES
THAT INGRID WAS
AN ILLEGAL ALIEN,
AND THAT RANDOLPH WAS SEEKING
TO OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT,
SO THEY HAD TO STAY
IN ECUADOR,
AND MOTHER GAVE JESSICA
THE BABY
TO BE RAISED AS A TATE.
WELL,
WHY DIDN'T THEY...
NO QUESTIONS!
THAT'S IT.
FINISHED.
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR
ANOTHER WORD
ABOUT THIS IDIOTIC BUSINESS.
NOW, MR. CAMPBELL,
I UNDERSTAND THAT RECENTLY
YOU CONSULTED A PSYCHIATRIST.
DID YOU CONSULT HIM
BECAUSE OF YOUR PROPENSITY
TO VIOLENCE?
THAT'S NONE
OF YOUR BUSINESS.
YOU ARE WRONG,
MR. CAMPBELL, DUMMKOPF.
IT IS VERY MUCH MY BUSINESS.
NOW, IF YOU WON'T TELL ME
WHY YOU SAW HIM,
I WILL HAVE TO ASSUME
IT WAS FOR HELP
IN CONTROLLING
YOUR VIOLENT TENDENCIES.
WELL, IT WAS NOT.
YOU SEE IT WAS BECAUSE I...
OK, VIOLENCE.
IMPOTENCE.
REALLY?
YEAH.
YOU'RE KIDDING.
NO, IT'S THE TRUTH.
I LOVE IT!
SO CLASSICALLY AMERICAN.
A PROBLEM WE NEVER HAVE
IN GERMANY.
NO IMPOTENCE,
NO SMOG...
NO JEWS.
NO...
IMPOTENCE?
A BIG, ROBUST GUY LIKE YOU?
I JUST WISH I HAD A CAMERA
FOR THAT ONE, MR. CAMPBELL.
I COULD PUT YOU IN JAIL
AND THROW AWAY THE KEY.
NOW THEN, MRS. CAMPBELL,
HOW MUCH DID YOU RESENT,
HATE AND DESPISE
PETER CAMPBELL?
WHAT?
JUST ANSWER, PLEASE,
THE QUESTION.
GOOD GOD!
YOU PEOPLE STALL
LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS.
I DIDN'T HATE HIM.
I NEVER HATED HIM.
OK. FINE.
WE HAVE HERE DENIALS, THEN.
DENIAL OF
THE PAINFUL TRUTH.
NOW, JODIE...
THAT'S NOT TRUE.
I SAID JODIE!
ARE YOU JODIE?
DO YOU LOOK LIKE JODIE?
DO YOU TALK LIKE JODIE?
SOMETIMES THEY DRESS ALIKE.
PLEASE TO PUT
THE TOY AWAY.
WHO IS HE TALKING TO?
NOW, JODIE,
IN YOUR CASE
IT WAS OBVIOUSLY
A TRANSFERENCE, HMM?
A HOMOSEXUAL
IN LOVE WITH AN ATHLETE,
WHO SPURNED HIM,
THUS TURNING TO RAGE
AND THEN...
MURDER.
WE HAVE PRECEDENTS
FOR THIS TYPE OF
HOMOSEXUAL BEHAVIOR.
NOT IN GERMANY, OF COURSE.
WE HAVE NO HOMOSEXUALS
IN GERMANY.
THEY ARE IN AUSTRIA
OR SWITZERLAND.
WHERE IN SWITZERLAND?
NOW, DANNY,
THIS IS AN EASY ONE.
YOU WORK IN
A VIOLENT SOCIETY, HMM?
YOU WOULD THINK NOTHING
OF KILLING PETER, HMM?
OH...
AND YOU,
WE KNOW YOU ALWAYS
HATED YOUR BROTHER.
I DID NOT.
BECAUSE YOU WERE
JEALOUS OF HIM.
OH, GO BACK TO ARGENTINA,
ADOLF.
HE WAS AN ATHLETE.
AND YOU, CHUCK?
YOU'RE A KLUTZ.
HE HAD MANY WOMEN.
YOU?
YOU GOT YOURSELF
A HUNK OF BARK.
NOW LISTEN...
SO,
YOU KILLED HIM.
I DID NOT.
BECAUSE HE REMINDED YOU
OF WHAT YOU WEREN'T...
OF WHAT YOU AREN'T,
OF WHAT YOU COULD
NEVER BE.
HEY, WHO DO YOU THINK...
SHUT UP!
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR
ANOTHER WORD FROM YOU!
THIS STUPIDITY
HAS WASTED MY TIME.
I WILL FILE MY REPORT.
YOU WILL ALL
STAY IN TOWN.
I HOPE I NEVER AGAIN
HAVE TO SEE ANY OF YOU
AS LONG AS I LIVE.
NICE, WARM GUY.
I LIKE HIM.
SO, IT'S ALL MY FAULT, MARY.
ALL OF IT.
PETER'S DEATH.
CORINNE'S ARREST.
INGRID'S ARRIVAL.
IT'S ALL MY FAULT.
JESSICA, DON'T BE SILLY.
NONE OF THAT HAS ANYTHING
TO DO WITH YOU.
NO?
WHEREVER I AM, MARY,
THERE'S DEATH AND DESTRUCTION.
IT'S ALWAYS BEEN THAT WAY.
JESSICA, THAT'S NOT TRUE.
YOU REMEMBER MR. ROLO
AND WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?
MR. ROLO?
YES, YOU REMEMBER.
THE CLOWN THAT USED
TO ENTERTAIN
AT ALL
OF OUR BIRTHDAY PARTIES
WHEN WE WERE LITTLE.
MR. ROLO...
OH, JESSICA,
DO YOU REMEMBER MR. ROLO?
WELL, MARY, OBVIOUSLY I DO.
I JUST BROUGHT HIM UP.
I LOVED MR. ROLO.
AND DO YOU REMEMBER
HOW, AT MY BIRTHDAY PARTY,
HE JUST KEELED OVER
AND DROPPED DEAD ON THE SPOT?
HI, MAR'.
HI, DARLING.
HI, JESS.
HI, BURT.
OH, BURT!
WHAT?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
NOTHING.
BURT!
YOU JUST PULLED A HAIR
OUT FROM MY HEAD.
NO, I DIDN'T.
I'M NOT FINISHED.
IS THAT YOUR SPOON?
YES.
PERHAPS HE'D LIKE
SOME TEA...
BURT,
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
NOTHING.
BURT, YOU PULLED
A HAIR OUT OF MY HEAD,
AND I JUST SAW YOU
PULL ONE
OUT OF JESSICA'S HEAD.
MORE THAN ONE, I'M AFRAID.
WELL, YOU SEE, I'M JUST
CONDUCTING A TEST, MARY.
CONDUCTING A TEST.
YOU SEE, I FOUND
A HAIR IN PETER'S BATHTUB.
A HAIR IN HIS TUB.
WELL, OF COURSE,
OF COURSE.
IT'S A BATHTUB.
THERE ARE ALWAYS HAIRS
IN THE BATHTUB.
IT'S SUCH A PROBLEM.
HAIR.
OH, IT JUST
CLOGS UP THE DRAIN,
AND THEN THE PLUMBER
HAS TO COME AND REMOVE IT.
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN
WHAT THEY REMOVE, BURT?
OH, IT'S SO DISGUSTING.
IT'S NO WONDER
THEY CHARGE SO MUCH.
I'D CHARGE A FORTUNE, TOO,
IF I HAD TO TOOK AT
HAIRY HUNKS OF GLOOP ALL DAY.
"GLOOP ALL DAY."
IT'S NOT GLOOP.
WELL, IT JUST MIGHT
BE A HAIRY HUNK OF GLOOP...
THAT HANGS ONE OF YOU.
CHESTER,
I JUST REALIZED
SOMETHING
VERY IMPORTANT.
WHAT, JESSICA?
YOU WANT ME TO GET THAT?
WOULD YOU MIND?
WHAT DID YOU REALIZE, JESSICA?
10 YEARS AGO, THIS COULD
NEVER HAVE HAPPENED.
WHAT?
PETER WAS A TENNIS TEACHER.
YES.
WELL, 10 YEARS AGO
NOBODY PLAYED TENNIS.
THE RECENT POPULARITY
OF TENNIS
HAS RUINED OUR LIVES.
HE ALWAYS COMES
AT MEAL TIMES.
THE GUY'S A RACCOON.
I'M SORRY
TO BOTHER YOU.
TINKLER,
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
WELL,
FIRST I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE
INVESTIGATOR RICK HIMMEL.
NOT "RICK," YOU FOOL.
HEINRICH!
HEINRICH!
ARE YOU A FOREIGNER?
HE'S GERMAN.
A GERMAN?
GOOD WORK, CORPORAL.
CAPTURING THEM ISN'T EASY.
CARRY ON.
TINKLER,
DO YOU WANT SOMETHING,
OR IS THIS A LUFTHANSA TOUR?
WELL I, UH, WOULD LIKE
TO LOOK THROUGH THE HOUSE.
WHAT?
I'VE HAD ENOUGH,
TINKLER.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU.
THIS IS MY HOUSE.
GET OUT OF HERE,
ONCE AND FOR ALL,
BEFORE I CALL
THE POLICE.
I AM THE POLICE.
AS DIFFICULT AS THAT
IS TO BELIEVE.
I HAVE A SEARCH WARRANT.
AND WHILE I AM LOOKING
THROUGH YOUR HOUSE,
RICK HERE HAS SOME QUESTIONS
HE WANTS TO ASK.
HEINRICH!
HEINRICH, YOU FOOL!
NOW, YOU ARE EUNICE,
I PRESUME?
MMM-HMM.
YOU LIKE TO FOOL PEOPLE,
DON'T YOU?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
OH, PRETENDING TO BE COLD,
SO THAT YOU DON'T GO OUT,
WHEN WE BOTH KNOW
THAT YOU'RE INVOLVED
WITH, UH...
OH, PLEASE.
FORTUNATELY FOR YOU,
YOU'RE A FOOLER,
NOT A MURDERER.
DO YOU FIND IT DIFFICULT
TALKING WITH A GERMAN ACCENT?
BECAUSE IT SEEMS LIKE IT
WOULD BE EXHAUSTING,
THE WAY YOU PRONOUNCE
WORDS SO HARD.
I MEAN SOMETIMES YOU EVEN
SPIT A LITTLE WHEN YOU TALK.
TALK? TALK?
THEY CAN PUT
MATCHES UNDER MY NAILS.
I'LL NEVER TALK.
SO, NEVER TALK!
I DON'T CARE
ABOUT YOUR TALKING.
NEVER TALK!
I WON'T.
GOOD, DON'T.
I WON'T.
I SWEAR,
I DON'T KNOW HOW
YOU PEOPLE WON THE WAR.
I NEVER SAW SUCH A NATION
OF UTTER FOOLS,
EXCEPT IN ITALY.
BUT THEY,
OF COURSE, CAN COOK.
YOU PEOPLE,
YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT.
THERE. THERE YOU DID IT
WHEN YOU SAID, "THAT."
YOU SPIT A LITTLE.
YOU DID.
I FELT IT ON MY CHEEK.
AND YOU?
OH,
YOU ARE MY FAVORITE.
BOY, OH, BOY,
I GOTTA HAND IT TO YOU.
YOU ARE SOMETHING.
BOY,
ARE YOU A BUSY GUY.
THERE'S THAT PIGEON, HUH,
AND THEN THAT SECRETARY.
I ADMIRE YOU.
IF YOU
COMMITTED THE MURDER,
YOU SHOULD GET AWAY
WITH IT.
THANK YOU.
YOU?
YOU ARE THE BLACK SERVANT,
BENSON, HMM?
NO, I AM JAPANESE HOUSE BOY,
MOJO.
HALT!
YOU COULD HAVE KILLED PETER,
HMM?
BECAUSE
YOU WERE JEALOUS.
HE WAS WHITE.
YOU ARE BLACK.
HE HAD WOMEN,
YOUTH, FREEDOM.
YOU? YOU'VE GOT AN APRON,
AND MAYBE
A DECENT TIME STEP.
NOW, LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHIN', YOU LITTLE
NAZI SHRIMP.
NOW, YOU CAN TALK TO THEM
ANY WAY YOU WANT TO,
BUT NOW YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ME,
BENSON.
AND I PERSONALLY
HAVE HAD IT
WITH YOUR SHOUTING
AND BULLYING AND SPITTING.
NOBODY HERE KILLED ANYONE,
NOT YET.
BRAVO, BENSON.
SORRY ABOUT THAT, FOLKS.
THERE'LL BE
NO DESSERT TONIGHT.
WELL, FOLKS,
I'VE GOT SOME GOOD NEWS
AND SOME BAD NEWS.
AHEM.
IS THAT
STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE?
YES.
OH, BOY, DO I LOVE
STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE.
TINKLER?
OH, YEAH. WELL,
THE CHARGES AGAINST CORINNE
HAVE BEEN DROPPED.
THAT'S THE GOOD NEWS.
OH, CHESTER,
ISN'T IT WONDERFUL?
NOW FOR THE BAD NEWS.
UH, COULDN'T WE JUST
FORGET ABOUT THAT?
ON MY LITTLE SEARCH
THROUGH YOUR HOUSE,
I FOUND THE GUN
THAT SHOT PETER CAMPBELL.
I FOUND THE KNIFE
THAT STABBED PETER CAMPBELL.
AND I FOUND THE BRICK
THAT HIT PETER CAMPBELL.
NOW THE GUN WAS
FOUND IN YOUR DRAWER,
THE KNIFE WAS FOUND
IN YOUR JEWELRY BOX,
AND THE BRICK WAS FOUND
IN YOUR ROSE GARDEN.
MRS. TATE,
YOU ARE UNDER ARREST
FOR THE MURDER
OF PETER CAMPBELL.
WILL CORINNE EVER FORGIVE
JESSICA AND CHESTER
FOR NOT TELLING HER
SHE WAS ADOPTED?
WILL THE COURT ACCEPT
BURT'S FINDINGS AS EVIDENCE?
OR WILL THE JUDGE RULE IT
"HAIR-SAY"?
DID JESSICA
KILL PETER CAMPBELL?
OR DOES SHE MERELY
COLLECT MURDER WEAPONS?
WILL THE TATES
DO WITHOUT DESSERT,
OR WILL THEY EAT
HEINRICH'S PANTS?
THESE QUESTIONS,
AND MANY OTHERS,
WILL BE ANSWERED
ON THE NEXT EPISODE OF
SOAP.
SOAP WAS VIDEOTAPED
IN FRONT OF
A STUDIO AUDIENCE.
A SURPRISED CORINNE
WAS BOOKED FOR THE MURDER
OF PETER CAMPBELL.
BUT THIS IS NOTHING
COMPARED TO THE SURPRISE
IN STORE FOR HER
WHEN SHE FINDS OUT
THAT A SWEDISH LADY,
INGRID SVENSON,
HAS COME FROM ECUADOR
TO PAY CORINNE
A SURPRISE VISIT,
AND HAS SHOWN
A SURPRISED
CHIEF TINKLER PROOF
THAT SHE IS
CORINNE'S REAL MOTHER.
SURPRISED?
YOU WON'T BE AFTER
THIS EPISODE OF...
THIS IS
THE STORY OF 2 SISTERS,
JESSICA TATE
AND MARY CAMPBELL.
THESE ARE THE TATES,
AND THESE ARE THE CAMPBELLS.
AND THIS IS...
OH, MA. DADDY.
OH, BABY.
BABY, THE BAIL WILL
BE HERE ANY MINUTE.
OH, GOOD.
I CANNOT BELIEVE
THESE ACCOMMODATIONS.
WELL, I MEAN, CHESTER,
NO WONDER PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS
TRYING TO BREAK OUT
OF PLACES LIKE THIS.
OH. CHESTER.
LOOK AT THAT.
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT?
I SEE IT, JESSICA.
IT'S A TOILET.
I KNOW WHAT IT IS.
IT'S RIGHT IN
THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM.
HOW DO THEY EXPECT
ANYBODY TO USE THAT?
JESSICA, IF YOU'RE SERVING
A 10-YEAR SENTENCE,
EVENTUALLY YOU HAVE TO.
LOOK AT THIS.
YOU POOR CHILD.
SHUT UP IN THIS CELL
WITHOUT ANY SUNSHINE,
HUNDREDS OF FEET
BELOW THE EARTH.
THE CHAINS OF PRISONERS
CLANKING IN THE NIGHT.
THE MUSTY SMELL
OF THE WET STONES,
AND THE SOUND
OF SCAMPERING RATS
ACROSS THE FLOOR AT NIGHT.
JESSICA.
HUH?
CORINNE IS IN
A CONNECTICUT JAIL.
SHE'S NOT
THE PRISONER OF ZENDA.
CORINNE?
I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU.
BAIL?
NO, BETTER.
CORINNE, CORINNE, CORINNE.
OH, MY GOD!
WHO IS THIS?
CORINNE, CORINNE, CORINNE.
WHO IS THIS?
WHO ARE YOU?
WHO AM I?
YES, WHO ARE YOU?
HA!
WHO IS THIS?
23 YEARS.
FOR 23 YEARS
I'VE BEEN IN ECUADOR.
AND FOR 23 YEARS
I'VE HATED YOU!
JESSICA,
WHO IS THIS PERSON?
LOOK AT HER.
LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE.
IT WASN'T BAD ENOUGH
YOU TOOK HER AWAY FROM ME,
BUT LOOK AT HOW
YOU BROUGHT HER UP
TO BE IN JAIL.
OH, MY GOD.
IT'S HER.
RIGHT. THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER
SEE ME AGAIN, DID YOU?
HA!
M-MOTHER,
WHO IS THIS WOMAN?
DARLING,
I AM YOUR MOTHER.
OH.
SHERIFF,
GET HER OUT OF HERE.
SHE'S NUTS!
SHE'S GOT
DOCUMENTS.
AND SHE CERTAINLY
KNOWS YOUR NAME.
SHE SAYS SHE'S MY MOTHER.
SHE'S NOT MY MOTHER.
THIS IS MY MOTHER.
MOTHER?
HMM?
MOTHER, FOR GOD'S SAKE,
TELL ME WHO THIS IS.
UH, CORINNE,
THIS IS INGRID SVENSON.
INGRID,
THIS IS CORINNE.
CORINNE, CORINNE, CORINNE.
SHE SAYS
SHE'S MY MOTHER!
YES, SHE DID SAY THAT,
DIDN'T SHE?
WELL, WHO IS SHE?
SHE IS YOUR MOTHER.
WHO'S MY MOTHER?
SHE'S YOUR MOTHER.
WHICH SHE?
THAT SHE.
THIS SHE?
THAT SHE.
INGRID'S
MY MOTHER?
YES. IT'S A LONG STORY,
CORINNE.
CORINNE,
CORINNE, CORINNE.
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?
YOU NEVER TOLD ME.
HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME?
WELL,
WE THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER KNOW.
I WANT YOU TO GO, NOW!
CORINNE, WE WERE
TRYING TO PROTECT YOU.
I SAID, "GO."
CORINNE,
I LOVE YOU.
SHE WANTS YOU
TO GO.
DOES SHE HAVE
TO SPIT AT YOU?
CORINNE,
IF YOU HAD BEEN
OUR OWN CHILD,
WE COULDN'T HAVE
LOVED YOU ANY MORE.
SHERIFF,
GET 'EM OUT OF HERE.
OK. IT'S, UH,
IT'S TIME. LET'S GO.
COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON.
LET'S GO. LET'S GO.
LET'S GO.
HA!
MY LITTLE GIRL.
DON'T WORRY.
WE'LL GET YOU OUT OF HERE.
I HIRED A DETECTIVE,
AND WE GET YOU OUT OF HERE.
AND THEN WE GET
A PLACE TOGETHER,
AND GET TO KNOW
EACH OTHER ALL OVER AGAIN.
NOW, LET MOTHER LOOK
AT HOW PRETTY YOU ARE.
SO, NOW, TELL MOTHER,
WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING
THE LAST 23 YEARS?
I SAID, "QUIET,"
BOB.
YOU BE QUIET.
I'M HAPPY FOR A CHANGE.
BURT,
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THAT?
PETER'S BATHTUB.
I'VE GOT THE REST OUTSIDE.
BOY, I'VE HEARD OF SOUVENIRS,
BUT THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
BURT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING
WITH PETER'S BATHTUB?
WHY NOT?
PETER DOESN'T NEED IT ANYMORE.
IN THIS TUB
IS THE ANSWER.
I KNOW THAT IT'S HERE.
IT'S HERE.
THE MURDERER LEFT HIS TRACE
RIGHT IN THERE,
OR OUT THERE WITH
ONE OF THE OTHER PIECES.
I THOUGHT YOU SAID
CORINNE DID IT?
UH, NOT NECESSARILY.
HEY, EVERYBODY.
HEY, LISTEN, THERE'S
THIS HUGE CHUNK OF BATHTUB
LAYING OUT IN THE PATH.
SOMEBODY COULD
KILL THEMSELVES ON IT.
YEAH,
SOMEBODY ALREADY DID.
DANNY,
WHERE'S YOUR DISGUISE?
WELL, UH, I DON'T THINK
I'M GONNA NEED IT ANYMORE.
I FOUND SOMEBODY
WHO'S GONNA HELP ME OUT.
OH, TOO BAD.
MRS. CAMPBELL?
YES.
I AM HEINRICH HIMMEL,
A PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR HIRED
BY CORINNE TATE'S MOTHER.
MAY I COME IN?
YES.
I THINK YOU SHOULD KNOW
THAT THERE IS A BROKEN BATHTUB
ON YOUR LAWN,
AND IT LOOKS DISGUSTING.
WELL, THAT'S MINE.
I'LL GET IT.
HALT!
I DIDN'T KNOW JESSICA HAD
HIRED A PRIVATE DETECTIVE.
SHE DIDN'T.
BUT YOU SAID...
I SAID,
"CORINNE TATE'S MOTHER."
INGRID SVENSON.
INGRID SVENSON?
INGRID SVENSON.
QUIET!
ENOUGH.
MRS. INGRID SVENSON.
NOW, MRS. CAMPBELL,
I HAVE QUESTIONS
AND YOU WILL GIVE ANSWERS.
MAKE THEM BRIEF,
NO LONG, BORING STORIES,
WHICH YOU AMERICANS
SEEM SO BENT ON TELLING.
WHO IS THIS
INGRID SVENSON?
WHAT DID I SAY?
WHAT DID YOU
JUST HEAR ME SAY?
I'LL TELL YOU LATER.
TELL THEM NOW.
THEY'LL NEVER SHUT UP
IF YOU DON'T TELL THEM NOW.
BUT QUICK.
A QUICK, SHORT STORY.
NO DETAILS.
UNDERSTAND?
NO DETAILS.
MACHT SCHNELL!
SIT. SIT. SIT.
WELL, JESSICA AND I
HAD A BROTHER, RANDOLPH.
YOU NEVER TOLD ME
YOU HAD A BROTHER.
SHUT UP.
SHE'S TELLING YOU NOW.
WELL, UH, RANDOLPH
TOOK A LIKING TO INGRID,
OUR SWEDISH MAID.
SEE, INGRID
DIDN'T SPEAK ANY ENGLISH,
SO SHE DIDN'T KNOW
RANDOLPH WAS PECULIAR.
DETAILS.
THOSE ARE DETAILS.
WE DON'T CARE ABOUT PECULIAR.
YOU ARE ALL PECULIAR.
ANYWAY,
INGRID GOT PREGNANT
AND HAD CORINNE.
NOW, MOTHER
WANTED THE BABY,
SO SHE VERY CLEVERLY
OFFERED TO BABY-SIT,
AND THEN SHE SENT INGRID
AND RANDOLPH TO ECUADOR...
DETAILS!
MORE DETAILS!
HUT, HUT, HUT,
HUT, HUT, HUT.
SHE TOLD THE AUTHORITIES
THAT INGRID WAS
AN ILLEGAL ALIEN,
AND THAT RANDOLPH WAS SEEKING
TO OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT,
SO THEY HAD TO STAY
IN ECUADOR,
AND MOTHER GAVE JESSICA
THE BABY
TO BE RAISED AS A TATE.
WELL,
WHY DIDN'T THEY...
NO QUESTIONS!
THAT'S IT.
FINISHED.
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR
ANOTHER WORD
ABOUT THIS IDIOTIC BUSINESS.
NOW, MR. CAMPBELL,
I UNDERSTAND THAT RECENTLY
YOU CONSULTED A PSYCHIATRIST.
DID YOU CONSULT HIM
BECAUSE OF YOUR PROPENSITY
TO VIOLENCE?
THAT'S NONE
OF YOUR BUSINESS.
YOU ARE WRONG,
MR. CAMPBELL, DUMMKOPF.
IT IS VERY MUCH MY BUSINESS.
NOW, IF YOU WON'T TELL ME
WHY YOU SAW HIM,
I WILL HAVE TO ASSUME
IT WAS FOR HELP
IN CONTROLLING
YOUR VIOLENT TENDENCIES.
WELL, IT WAS NOT.
YOU SEE IT WAS BECAUSE I...
OK, VIOLENCE.
IMPOTENCE.
REALLY?
YEAH.
YOU'RE KIDDING.
NO, IT'S THE TRUTH.
I LOVE IT!
SO CLASSICALLY AMERICAN.
A PROBLEM WE NEVER HAVE
IN GERMANY.
NO IMPOTENCE,
NO SMOG...
NO JEWS.
NO...
IMPOTENCE?
A BIG, ROBUST GUY LIKE YOU?
I JUST WISH I HAD A CAMERA
FOR THAT ONE, MR. CAMPBELL.
I COULD PUT YOU IN JAIL
AND THROW AWAY THE KEY.
NOW THEN, MRS. CAMPBELL,
HOW MUCH DID YOU RESENT,
HATE AND DESPISE
PETER CAMPBELL?
WHAT?
JUST ANSWER, PLEASE,
THE QUESTION.
GOOD GOD!
YOU PEOPLE STALL
LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS.
I DIDN'T HATE HIM.
I NEVER HATED HIM.
OK. FINE.
WE HAVE HERE DENIALS, THEN.
DENIAL OF
THE PAINFUL TRUTH.
NOW, JODIE...
THAT'S NOT TRUE.
I SAID JODIE!
ARE YOU JODIE?
DO YOU LOOK LIKE JODIE?
DO YOU TALK LIKE JODIE?
SOMETIMES THEY DRESS ALIKE.
PLEASE TO PUT
THE TOY AWAY.
WHO IS HE TALKING TO?
NOW, JODIE,
IN YOUR CASE
IT WAS OBVIOUSLY
A TRANSFERENCE, HMM?
A HOMOSEXUAL
IN LOVE WITH AN ATHLETE,
WHO SPURNED HIM,
THUS TURNING TO RAGE
AND THEN...
MURDER.
WE HAVE PRECEDENTS
FOR THIS TYPE OF
HOMOSEXUAL BEHAVIOR.
NOT IN GERMANY, OF COURSE.
WE HAVE NO HOMOSEXUALS
IN GERMANY.
THEY ARE IN AUSTRIA
OR SWITZERLAND.
WHERE IN SWITZERLAND?
NOW, DANNY,
THIS IS AN EASY ONE.
YOU WORK IN
A VIOLENT SOCIETY, HMM?
YOU WOULD THINK NOTHING
OF KILLING PETER, HMM?
OH...
AND YOU,
WE KNOW YOU ALWAYS
HATED YOUR BROTHER.
I DID NOT.
BECAUSE YOU WERE
JEALOUS OF HIM.
OH, GO BACK TO ARGENTINA,
ADOLF.
HE WAS AN ATHLETE.
AND YOU, CHUCK?
YOU'RE A KLUTZ.
HE HAD MANY WOMEN.
YOU?
YOU GOT YOURSELF
A HUNK OF BARK.
NOW LISTEN...
SO,
YOU KILLED HIM.
I DID NOT.
BECAUSE HE REMINDED YOU
OF WHAT YOU WEREN'T...
OF WHAT YOU AREN'T,
OF WHAT YOU COULD
NEVER BE.
HEY, WHO DO YOU THINK...
SHUT UP!
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR
ANOTHER WORD FROM YOU!
THIS STUPIDITY
HAS WASTED MY TIME.
I WILL FILE MY REPORT.
YOU WILL ALL
STAY IN TOWN.
I HOPE I NEVER AGAIN
HAVE TO SEE ANY OF YOU
AS LONG AS I LIVE.
NICE, WARM GUY.
I LIKE HIM.
SO, IT'S ALL MY FAULT, MARY.
ALL OF IT.
PETER'S DEATH.
CORINNE'S ARREST.
INGRID'S ARRIVAL.
IT'S ALL MY FAULT.
JESSICA, DON'T BE SILLY.
NONE OF THAT HAS ANYTHING
TO DO WITH YOU.
NO?
WHEREVER I AM, MARY,
THERE'S DEATH AND DESTRUCTION.
IT'S ALWAYS BEEN THAT WAY.
JESSICA, THAT'S NOT TRUE.
YOU REMEMBER MR. ROLO
AND WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?
MR. ROLO?
YES, YOU REMEMBER.
THE CLOWN THAT USED
TO ENTERTAIN
AT ALL
OF OUR BIRTHDAY PARTIES
WHEN WE WERE LITTLE.
MR. ROLO...
OH, JESSICA,
DO YOU REMEMBER MR. ROLO?
WELL, MARY, OBVIOUSLY I DO.
I JUST BROUGHT HIM UP.
I LOVED MR. ROLO.
AND DO YOU REMEMBER
HOW, AT MY BIRTHDAY PARTY,
HE JUST KEELED OVER
AND DROPPED DEAD ON THE SPOT?
HI, MAR'.
HI, DARLING.
HI, JESS.
HI, BURT.
OH, BURT!
WHAT?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
NOTHING.
BURT!
YOU JUST PULLED A HAIR
OUT FROM MY HEAD.
NO, I DIDN'T.
I'M NOT FINISHED.
IS THAT YOUR SPOON?
YES.
PERHAPS HE'D LIKE
SOME TEA...
BURT,
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
NOTHING.
BURT, YOU PULLED
A HAIR OUT OF MY HEAD,
AND I JUST SAW YOU
PULL ONE
OUT OF JESSICA'S HEAD.
MORE THAN ONE, I'M AFRAID.
WELL, YOU SEE, I'M JUST
CONDUCTING A TEST, MARY.
CONDUCTING A TEST.
YOU SEE, I FOUND
A HAIR IN PETER'S BATHTUB.
A HAIR IN HIS TUB.
WELL, OF COURSE,
OF COURSE.
IT'S A BATHTUB.
THERE ARE ALWAYS HAIRS
IN THE BATHTUB.
IT'S SUCH A PROBLEM.
HAIR.
OH, IT JUST
CLOGS UP THE DRAIN,
AND THEN THE PLUMBER
HAS TO COME AND REMOVE IT.
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN
WHAT THEY REMOVE, BURT?
OH, IT'S SO DISGUSTING.
IT'S NO WONDER
THEY CHARGE SO MUCH.
I'D CHARGE A FORTUNE, TOO,
IF I HAD TO TOOK AT
HAIRY HUNKS OF GLOOP ALL DAY.
"GLOOP ALL DAY."
IT'S NOT GLOOP.
WELL, IT JUST MIGHT
BE A HAIRY HUNK OF GLOOP...
THAT HANGS ONE OF YOU.
CHESTER,
I JUST REALIZED
SOMETHING
VERY IMPORTANT.
WHAT, JESSICA?
YOU WANT ME TO GET THAT?
WOULD YOU MIND?
WHAT DID YOU REALIZE, JESSICA?
10 YEARS AGO, THIS COULD
NEVER HAVE HAPPENED.
WHAT?
PETER WAS A TENNIS TEACHER.
YES.
WELL, 10 YEARS AGO
NOBODY PLAYED TENNIS.
THE RECENT POPULARITY
OF TENNIS
HAS RUINED OUR LIVES.
HE ALWAYS COMES
AT MEAL TIMES.
THE GUY'S A RACCOON.
I'M SORRY
TO BOTHER YOU.
TINKLER,
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
WELL,
FIRST I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE
INVESTIGATOR RICK HIMMEL.
NOT "RICK," YOU FOOL.
HEINRICH!
HEINRICH!
ARE YOU A FOREIGNER?
HE'S GERMAN.
A GERMAN?
GOOD WORK, CORPORAL.
CAPTURING THEM ISN'T EASY.
CARRY ON.
TINKLER,
DO YOU WANT SOMETHING,
OR IS THIS A LUFTHANSA TOUR?
WELL I, UH, WOULD LIKE
TO LOOK THROUGH THE HOUSE.
WHAT?
I'VE HAD ENOUGH,
TINKLER.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU.
THIS IS MY HOUSE.
GET OUT OF HERE,
ONCE AND FOR ALL,
BEFORE I CALL
THE POLICE.
I AM THE POLICE.
AS DIFFICULT AS THAT
IS TO BELIEVE.
I HAVE A SEARCH WARRANT.
AND WHILE I AM LOOKING
THROUGH YOUR HOUSE,
RICK HERE HAS SOME QUESTIONS
HE WANTS TO ASK.
HEINRICH!
HEINRICH, YOU FOOL!
NOW, YOU ARE EUNICE,
I PRESUME?
MMM-HMM.
YOU LIKE TO FOOL PEOPLE,
DON'T YOU?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
OH, PRETENDING TO BE COLD,
SO THAT YOU DON'T GO OUT,
WHEN WE BOTH KNOW
THAT YOU'RE INVOLVED
WITH, UH...
OH, PLEASE.
FORTUNATELY FOR YOU,
YOU'RE A FOOLER,
NOT A MURDERER.
DO YOU FIND IT DIFFICULT
TALKING WITH A GERMAN ACCENT?
BECAUSE IT SEEMS LIKE IT
WOULD BE EXHAUSTING,
THE WAY YOU PRONOUNCE
WORDS SO HARD.
I MEAN SOMETIMES YOU EVEN
SPIT A LITTLE WHEN YOU TALK.
TALK? TALK?
THEY CAN PUT
MATCHES UNDER MY NAILS.
I'LL NEVER TALK.
SO, NEVER TALK!
I DON'T CARE
ABOUT YOUR TALKING.
NEVER TALK!
I WON'T.
GOOD, DON'T.
I WON'T.
I SWEAR,
I DON'T KNOW HOW
YOU PEOPLE WON THE WAR.
I NEVER SAW SUCH A NATION
OF UTTER FOOLS,
EXCEPT IN ITALY.
BUT THEY,
OF COURSE, CAN COOK.
YOU PEOPLE,
YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT.
THERE. THERE YOU DID IT
WHEN YOU SAID, "THAT."
YOU SPIT A LITTLE.
YOU DID.
I FELT IT ON MY CHEEK.
AND YOU?
OH,
YOU ARE MY FAVORITE.
BOY, OH, BOY,
I GOTTA HAND IT TO YOU.
YOU ARE SOMETHING.
BOY,
ARE YOU A BUSY GUY.
THERE'S THAT PIGEON, HUH,
AND THEN THAT SECRETARY.
I ADMIRE YOU.
IF YOU
COMMITTED THE MURDER,
YOU SHOULD GET AWAY
WITH IT.
THANK YOU.
YOU?
YOU ARE THE BLACK SERVANT,
BENSON, HMM?
NO, I AM JAPANESE HOUSE BOY,
MOJO.
HALT!
YOU COULD HAVE KILLED PETER,
HMM?
BECAUSE
YOU WERE JEALOUS.
HE WAS WHITE.
YOU ARE BLACK.
HE HAD WOMEN,
YOUTH, FREEDOM.
YOU? YOU'VE GOT AN APRON,
AND MAYBE
A DECENT TIME STEP.
NOW, LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHIN', YOU LITTLE
NAZI SHRIMP.
NOW, YOU CAN TALK TO THEM
ANY WAY YOU WANT TO,
BUT NOW YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ME,
BENSON.
AND I PERSONALLY
HAVE HAD IT
WITH YOUR SHOUTING
AND BULLYING AND SPITTING.
NOBODY HERE KILLED ANYONE,
NOT YET.
BRAVO, BENSON.
SORRY ABOUT THAT, FOLKS.
THERE'LL BE
NO DESSERT TONIGHT.
WELL, FOLKS,
I'VE GOT SOME GOOD NEWS
AND SOME BAD NEWS.
AHEM.
IS THAT
STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE?
YES.
OH, BOY, DO I LOVE
STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE.
TINKLER?
OH, YEAH. WELL,
THE CHARGES AGAINST CORINNE
HAVE BEEN DROPPED.
THAT'S THE GOOD NEWS.
OH, CHESTER,
ISN'T IT WONDERFUL?
NOW FOR THE BAD NEWS.
UH, COULDN'T WE JUST
FORGET ABOUT THAT?
ON MY LITTLE SEARCH
THROUGH YOUR HOUSE,
I FOUND THE GUN
THAT SHOT PETER CAMPBELL.
I FOUND THE KNIFE
THAT STABBED PETER CAMPBELL.
AND I FOUND THE BRICK
THAT HIT PETER CAMPBELL.
NOW THE GUN WAS
FOUND IN YOUR DRAWER,
THE KNIFE WAS FOUND
IN YOUR JEWELRY BOX,
AND THE BRICK WAS FOUND
IN YOUR ROSE GARDEN.
MRS. TATE,
YOU ARE UNDER ARREST
FOR THE MURDER
OF PETER CAMPBELL.
WILL CORINNE EVER FORGIVE
JESSICA AND CHESTER
FOR NOT TELLING HER
SHE WAS ADOPTED?
WILL THE COURT ACCEPT
BURT'S FINDINGS AS EVIDENCE?
OR WILL THE JUDGE RULE IT
"HAIR-SAY"?
DID JESSICA
KILL PETER CAMPBELL?
OR DOES SHE MERELY
COLLECT MURDER WEAPONS?
WILL THE TATES
DO WITHOUT DESSERT,
OR WILL THEY EAT
HEINRICH'S PANTS?
THESE QUESTIONS,
AND MANY OTHERS,
WILL BE ANSWERED
ON THE NEXT EPISODE OF
SOAP.
SOAP WAS VIDEOTAPED
IN FRONT OF
A STUDIO AUDIENCE.