Smallville (2001–2011): Season 9, Episode 18 - Charade - full transcript

The new editor tells Clark and Lois only one of them 'imps' may keep his/her job. they still collaborate, hoping a super-scoop should change his mind. An apparent opportunity is when Raymond Sacks, fires as D.A. for ordering a failed attempt at Lois's life, is spared prosecution and throws a nightclub celebration. Clark is warned by Chloe the blur's secret is compromised by impostor Zod's contact with Lois. He discovers Maxwell Lord, a wealthy tycoon and Checkmate king-level rogue, enlists Sacks for a plan to identify the Blur, whom a delivery-boy photographed, so he's captured like several people known to have seen him.

Previously on Smallville:

I've picked out a nice font for my expos?.

I actually had another headline in mind.

"The Blur Murders Lois Lane."


I know you're out there somewhere.

I've been keeping an eye on you.

I have to see you.

How do you feel about phone booths?


This is
the Red-Blue Blur. I received your letter.

What I've really been wondering is,
what is it you need?

I need your help.

- But you can't tell anyone about it.
- I promise.

I wouldn't ask
if it weren't a matter of life or death.

Welcome to Checkmate.

We've been blocked by a new player.

How do you get yourself
into these things, Lane?

Evening, sir. Good to see you.

An honor, sir.

The guy's inside, boss.
Says he'll only show it to you.

- Wants to collect the million-dollar reward.

Hi, Ray.

Hey, doll face.

Hey, boss.
Ha, ha. My old friend.

- It's been too long.
Ray, how you doing?


- Glad to have you back, Ray.
Oh, good to be back, darling.

Your coat, sir?

Thanks, sweetie.
- Go right in.

Well, as your ex-district attorney...

...I'd like to thank you all
for joining me in celebrating...

...the national treasure
that is our American justice system.

You know, they kicked me out of office...

...they charged me
with attempted murder...

...they even tried to put me away for life,
and yet... I am.

So I understand you have something
for me.

What about my million dollars?

Don't test me, son.



I told you to find the story...

...not be the story.

One of you wanna tell me
what happened?

Let me guess.

You two had a lovers' spat?

Clark and I don't spat.
There was no spatting.

Lois is saying we try not to let our
personal lives get in the way of our jobs.

Well, you don't have to try anymore.

Because you're both fired.


Can you believe it? I'm early.

No, Lois, early is when you arrive
at your destination by a set time...

...not when you see it
seven blocks away.

Uh-uh. Nobody's raining
on this girl's parade today.

Clark's taking me up to the roof tonight
to do a little stargazing.

Okay. That explains the 911
to the craigslist queen.

Long live the queen.

I can't believe you got one so fast.

I kind of noticed that Clark has this thing
for telescopes.

Do you think he'll like it?

I think he'll love it.

But what is it exactly about a telescope
that merits 76 trombones and a big parade?

Well, tonight's the night.

In the words of the general:

"It's time to drop the L-bomb."

What? You mean to tell me that you guys
haven't volleyed the word yet?

Among other significant
relationship milestones.

I don't know.
Things used to be easier with Clark...

...back when you'd wake up...

...and the first thing you'd do
is check for a text or an e-mail...

...and it'd be there waiting for you.

Anyway, things have been different...

...ever since we decided
we could keep secrets from each other.

But that's all changing tonight.

Wait a minute. Secrets? Changing? How?

No more secrets.

It's time to take our baggage
out of the closet.

I mean, if we L each other...

...then nothing should come between us,

Hey, do you ever check your voicemail?

Somebody missed breakfast in bed
with Oliver.

I'm not here to talk about my love life.
I'm here to talk about yours.

Can't we stick to a topic
like aliens assimilating the Earth?

This isn't about assimilating, Clark.
Zod has powers now.

And you told him all of your secrets.

This is not a good time
to bring Lois in too.

- Lois?
- Yeah. She told me about your big date...

...where you both come clean
with everything.

I'm not gonna tell Lois anything.

I'm making Lois dinner tonight
so she shares her secret.

She's been keeping something from me.
I didn't wanna spy on her.

It's been driving me crazy.

So you're gonna seduce it out of her?

You're the reason all of this is happening.

I have not called her
as the Blur in months.

The second that your back-in-black
alter ego asked Lois to lie about the Blur...

...was the day you asked her to lie
to the person she loves, which is you.

And she did.

A relationship with secrets
can never work.

- Look at you and Oliver. Everything's out.
- Because we both understand...

...our relationship comes second
to a higher calling.

- Clark, you and Lois...
- Don't have to be any different.

Now, if Lois was gonna trust me tonight,
maybe it's time I trusted her.



Did you already get my message?


So we're still on for tonight?


What's in the box?

A surprise.

It's gonna be a long day.


How about a sneak preview?

Sometimes I swear
you have more than two hands.

Either that kiss
altered my sense of time and space...

...or this place is busier than usual.
It's a big news day.

It has something to do
with our new editor.

Another editor? They should install
a rotating door up there.

Our illustrious owner has spun
some big wheel of fortune in the sky... see who'd be steering the ship
this week.

Well, I guess I pulled the lucky number
this week.

Franklin Stern.
And this live wire must be...

...the lovely and charming Miss Lane,
I presume.

Miss Lane is an acquired taste.

It's just that ever since Tess went away,
we've gone through a lot of editors.

Well, not for long.

The board just launched a global search
for the next editor-in-chief.

I intend to make their decision very easy.

And you decided to start your campaign
by downsizing the desk inventory?

Miss Lane...

...I have been reading
through the personnel files... identify any red flags...

...and I understand you two are entangled
in an inter-office relationship?

- Heh. No.
- No, sir.

Yeah. Right.

Well, for whatever reason...'re both spending so much time
out of the office...

...trying to reel in the big fish...'re not delivering the daily catch.

To be fair, we've both turned in
some pretty big stories.

Here's a bigger one.

Our fair city's disgraced DA, Ray Sacks...

...just had his life sentence reversed.

He gets out of prison today.

Only one of these stays on the desk
at the end of the day.

May the best reporter win.

Oliver gave you keys to his office.

He must trust you
with just about all of his secrets.

Tess. I thought you were supposed
to be underground?

If you're having a hard time finding
your way there, I'm sure I could help.

So we're over the temporary truce
and straight back to fire at will.


Just remember, Chloe, that out there,
I might be MIA, but in here...

...I'm still CEO.

Where is Oliver?

Out of town.

I was curious how you two
got into each other's orbit.

Mutual friends.

Which I understand
you could use help finding...

...considering the fact you have to go
to outer space to look for them.

The Kandorians?

You'll see, Chloe,
they're better as allies than enemies.

Clark gets that.
Why don't you and Oliver?

Clark optimistically thinks...

...that Zod will be happy wearing an apron
and slinging coffees.

We don't.

Especially now that he has powers.


As in you and Green Arrow?

Chloe, I get what you see
in your heroes...

...but what do they see in you?

I could ask Zod the same about you,
but I guess I don't have to anymore.

I've been watching you two...

...and it seems like Zod hasn't been home
for dinner for quite a while.

Be careful, Miss Mercer.

At this rate,
you're gonna run out of people to betray.

What's worse? They freed the DA
that threw me off the roof...

...or our editor threw us in the ring
to wrestle for the desk?

Don't worry. If we land a big enough story,
we can save both our jobs.

In order to reverse his sentence...

...Sacks must still have powerful friends
down at city hall.

According to the blogs, he's having
a welcome home party at Maxwell's.

Crime kingpins like to keep out outsiders.

It'd be easier to crash the White House
than it would be to sneak into that party.

We have till the end of the day
to get this done.

We'd cover more ground
if we split the work.

That's a good idea.

Can't wait for tonight.

Hey, it's me, Lois. Guess you're out.

It's strange to think I can leave a message
for the Blur. Not "strange" weird.

It's hard to picture the Blur
screening his calls.

Not that you'd screen my calls but...

Me again. Got cut off.

That's not a lot of time for a message.
That beep comes at you pretty fast.

Then again, you are the Blur.
I'm sure you'd like it fast, but I...

Here's the deal.
I'm on a story about our deadly ex-DA.

Normally, I'd be working
with my partner...

...but I wanna keep him safe, secure,
and as far from Sacks...

...and his murderous mob as I can.

Clark's not bulletproof but you are.
Be my wingman?

Lois will find a way to see Sacks
before the party.

- Chloe, I have to find him first.
- I get it, Clark.

I'm spending a small fortune of Oliver's
money to update security at Watchtower.

Plus I have a satellite trained on your
fortress now that Zod knows your zip code.

I understand the instinct
to protect the ones you love.

Half of being in a relationship with Lois
is protecting her from herself.

Actually, she's not the only one
Sacks is gunning for right now.

He's offering a million-dollar reward...

...for anyone who can supply
an image of the Blur.

Again, what's with this guy
and his obsession with the Blur?

It has something to do
with the fact you disgraced him...

...and threw him in prison.

Since he's been out,
I have a hard time tracking him down.

Sacks is all about the VIP treatment.
Maybe he's got a favorite bar or restaurant.

Someplace that he would wanna go to
after being locked down for eight months.


Our paroled prosecutor
does have a favorite haunt...

...but it isn't exactly five-star.

Mr. Sacks.
Lois Lane from the Daily Planet.

You may remember me
from the roof of the Daily Planet.

Oh, yes. Yes, I remember you.

You have a nasty habit of always landing
on your feet, don't you?

And now I need to land a story.

So who let you out of your cage?

Since I'm the one that you sent skydiving
without a parachute...

...I figure I'm at least owed a quote.

You have too much faith
in the Blur, Lane... think you can meet with me
like this alone.

My editor knows where I am.

Hurt me, and you'll be back behind bars
before this pizza cools off.

Oh, I won't hurt you, no. He will.

And this time, they won't find me guilty
because they'll never find your body.

It's him. Come on. Go, go.


Thank you for saving my bacon.

I'd be two strips of pain on the pavement
if you hadn't gotten my call.

What call?

You have no idea what it means
that you trusted me enough... let me help you these past weeks.

I have never felt such a sense of purpose
in my entire life.

Whatever you need,
you can count on me.


That million's mine.
I got a picture of the Blur.

What you've got is two choices.

You either trash that photo
or I throw you in the trash.

Lois, stop.

- Who are you calling?
- It's not important.

No, that's the Blur, isn't it?

Why would you think that?
And what are you even doing here?

Lois, you told me
that you stopped talking to the Blur.

All those secrets that you've been keeping
from me, it's him, isn't it?

Okay, this is between the Blur and me.

That's all I can tell you.

Lois, do you even know
who you're really talking to?

Okay, what's going on here?
Clark, you don't need to be jealous.

No, I'm not. I just... Lois...

...I need to know who that is.

You did not just ask me that.

Is this about the story?

You want me to give up the Blur
just to save our job?

Lois, I'm trying to save you. Don't...

Don't you think
you might have too much blind faith?

Because if he trusted me,
he'd show himself? Is that it?


Okay, I need you to listen to me.

No, Clark.
I am sure he is dying to tell me.

But how could anyone who cares about me
put me in that kind of position?

If I knew his true identity...

...then every lowlife with high hopes
of hurting him would come after me...

...and he would never put me in that kind
of danger to get a secret off his back.

That's why I trust him.

I take it your search for Sacks
didn't go well.

I found Sacks,
but I may have just lost Lois...

...or at least her trust.

Oh, no. I know that look.

What happened?

I did this to myself, Chloe.

I asked Lois to keep her calls
with the Blur a secret...

...and she did...

...even from me.

Now someone is calling her,
pretending to be the Blur.

Why? Who would wanna Blur a mile
in your shoes?

I don't know. Checkmate, Zod, Tess.
They've all been circling my secret.

I stole her phone to see
who she was calling.

She's already deleted the list.

As much as I don't want to,
I have to say...'s impressive how committed Lois is
to protecting the Blur.

From me.

Yeah, talk about a Kafkaesque nightmare.

I almost ended it
and told her everything...

...till she reminded me why I can never
put her in that kind of danger.

I need to find whoever's lying to Lois
using my identity.

She said she had something to tell him.

And you want Watchtower to trace the call.
Got it.

I would've
called you on my cell, but I can't find it.

Someone photographed you
on their phone...

...and they're about to sell it
to Ray Sacks.

I don't know when you'll get this. I'll blitz
his bash and try to run interference.

You need to get there
as soon as you can.

Hey, where's the surprise?
What? I don't know.

It was supposed to be here
30 minutes ago.

Piece of cake.

They kicked me out of office...

...they charged me
with attempted murder...

...they even tried to put me away for life,
and yet... I am.

So I understand
you have something for me.

What about my million dollars?

Don't test me, son.



Oops. Sorry about your million dollars.

Oh, that's okay, kid.

We don't need that picture.
We just need you.

Three years of selfless service to this paper
and the new editor on the block fires me.

- Not just you.
- One of us would have kept their job...

...if you hadn't been so obsessed
with unmasking the Blur.

I don't know how you found out about
that photo, but crashing Sacks' party?

How many hurdles are you willing to jump
to expose the person I'm trying to protect?

You jumped out of a cake
and you slugged me.

It was just a distraction.

I had to do something extreme to destroy
that dangerous picture, no thanks to you.

- Lois...
- No, save it.

You have it in for the Blur.

Whatever you're gonna tell me
isn't gonna make a difference.

I'm seeing a whole other side of you, Clark,
and for the first time...

...I'm not a fan of the view.

I take it this is the official invitation
to join you, the Black King.

Your work on this operation has proven
to be surprisingly invaluable.

They have all witnessed the Blur.

Pieces of his identity
have been locked within their minds.

They simply need to be assembled.

And you're extracting their memories
with this whole Jedi mind-control thing.

Very impressive interrogation skills.

Listen, Mr. Lord,
I am no friend of the Blur...

...but why are you after him?

You are aware, Sacks,
that metahumans exist on the planet.

I assume this Checkmate agency wants
to use them to protect and serve?

That's the White Queen's plan.

Waller barks orders from behind a desk.

I work in the real world...

...a world that needs the rule of law.

Anything outside the natural order
is unpredictable.

Now, correct me if I'm wrong.

You have powers.

You're one of them.

Which is exactly why I know
how dangerous they can be...

...and why I plan on eliminating them.

Chloe, when did you find this?

- Can't you get a clearer picture?
- Whoa, Clark. Okay, one at a time.

I was following Lois in case
she found Sacks before you did.

I got the security footage
from a camera 60 floors up.

Now, unfortunately, zoom technology
isn't exactly on par with x-ray vision.

Where was Lois taken?

I don't know. I lost the car right after
it went into Rombauer Tunnel.

- This has to be Sacks.
- I did some digging.

Right around the time
our devious DA walked...

...all his new little prison friends
were transferred off the grid.

Chloe, I know these guys.
I put every one of them behind bars.

All violent offenders. The only person who
can authorize their transfer is the governor.

Who did you say threw Sacks'
little welcome home mobster ball?

Some tycoon named Maxwell Lord.

Three guesses who the largest contributor
to the governor's re-election fund was.

With that kind of influence,
Lord has serious strings he can pull.

If Maxwell Lord wants the Blur,
that's exactly who he'll get.

You should see Lord's setup downstairs.

This guy is a major player.

And he has just given me
the key to the city.


You're fighting it.

You know him, don't you?

Get away from her.


I see we're past formal introductions.


One wrong step and I'll eviscerate
every last thought in her head.

You're using their memories
to learn my identity.

- Let them go. They don't know who I am.
- True.

They've only seen glimpses of your face,
nothing more. You've been careful.

Except for this one.

Even unconscious,
her mind protects memories of you.

Maybe she doesn't have any.

Or maybe the connection
between you two is stronger.

Stronger than the fear that binds you
with the others.


...because of love.

You're here.

I can't know who you are.

I'd give anything to see your face... know your name.

But you can't protect us
if we know who you are.

I understand that now.


Sorry, Max. Little change of itinerary.

So it's true. The Red Queen does exist.

The upside to unemployment is you don't
have to pick out a tie every morning.

You're beating yourself up, aren't you?

Oh, which me?

The Blur Lois would die to protect or
the boyfriend Lois is protecting him from?

Don't be so hard on yourself, Clark.

Not everyone with a press pass
is moonlighting... the city's greatest superhero.

And the whole phone-rooftop-Blur thing... least give yourself points for trying
to be as honest as you could with Lois.

I guess if half of me has Lois' trust...

...and the other half gets the rest of her,
it all works out in some weird way.

There's only one problem with that.
One of those halves has to say goodbye.

I finished tracing the number
of our rogue Blur... RAO Industries.

It was Zod.

Everything he said about brotherhood,
it was all a lie.

Of course he's the one
who's been using Lois.

I know you wanna take
your anger out on Zod.

But you and I know there's something
you have to take care of first.

Until you can tell Lois
that you are the one and only Blur...

...anyone with a voice modulator
and a calling plan can pretend to be you.

I know what I have to do.


Lois, thank you for coming.

Well, when the Blur leaves a handwritten
message, you better believe I'm there.

Chalk it up to the curiosity
of a recently unemployed reporter...

...but since we've been doing this

...why are we back to doing this

I wanted to have this conversation... a place that meant something to us.

Oh. Sounds awfully official.

But, hey, you're the boss.

So, what's my next impossible mission?

There won't be one, Lois.

I'm sorry. This is our last conversation.

Last conversation today or for a while?

If you have to go back on another hiatus,
I understand. I'll be there.

As in, our last talk...



Our relationship put you at risk.

I know we would do anything
to protect each other.

What if one day I'm too late?

But you don't understand.
I don't care about the risk.

When I'm working with you,
I'm doing something good...

...something right.

You don't need me for that.

But I do need you.
I didn't realize it until it was too late...

...but this is the most important part
of my life.

There must be some other part
that means more to you.

When I'm with you,
it's about more than what I want...

...who I want.

It is something that is bigger than me.

I wish things could be different, Lois.

This is the only way I can protect you.

I won't call again.

If anyone calls claiming to be me...

...don't believe them.

No matter what they say or what happens,
you can't trust them.

No, please.

I will be watching over you.

I promise.

Goodbye, Lois.


I'm glad you still came up
after what we talked about on the street.

It's beautiful, Clark. Thank you.

What is it, Lois?

You know you can tell me anything.

Can I?

Then why did I lie to you?

We both agreed we would keep
some things to ourselves.

I have been talking to the Blur, Clark.

Doing things for him, sharing things
with him that I couldn't share with you.

It was probably just the reporter blood
in you, right?

It was more than that.

But we....

I talked to him and it's over.

He doesn't want me in his life anymore.

Well, there's someone standing right here
who still does.

It's okay.

You don't have to be okay with it, Clark.

It's not right for me
to ask that of you, Clark.

He meant a lot to you, didn't he?

It's not like this, with you.

I wish you could understand
what it felt like to have this....

A calling.

A duty to people in the world.

It made my feelings for you
and everything else seem....


Like there's a world out there that needs
you but if you take anything from it...'s at someone else's expense.

Lois, I do understand.


I guess, with him gone, the question is... I enough?