Smallville (2001–2011): Season 9, Episode 12 - Warrior - full transcript

Your attention, please.
Attention, please.

There's gonna be a panel starting
in 20 minutes.

Don't touch it, please.
I got it!

Wow.

This is awesome.

Whoa.

Warrior Angel.

Hey, Harry, is it true
that no one's ever read it before?

I read on the Internet
that no one in the whole world knows...

...what the Warrior Angel's
secret battle cry is.

- You've got to let me take a look at this.
- No, no. You know better than that.



Anybody opens that book,
the value drops.

I know.

But aren't you at least curious
what's inside?

Of course. I mean, who wouldn't?

But if I so much as breathe at it funny,
my boss would kill me.

Besides, there's nothing
in that fantasy world...

...that's gonna make a lick of difference
out here in the real one, kid.

No, no, no!

- Come on. Some of these are priceless.
Hey, look, man, I didn't see it.

Security! Security!
Somebody stole my comic book!

I'm sorry.

Hey.

- Sorry. I can't see a thing in this helmet.
- Lois.

This is not what I had in mind...



...when Randall said I gotta be
embedded journalist for the day.

Shouldn't be hard for Lois Lane
to nail down a human interest piece.

Save the hammer.
I can't get anything out of these people.

They keep looking at me
like I'm from another planet.

Which is saying something.

You know, no offense...

...but that armor doesn't exactly
make you Miss Approachable.

Look.

Like this?
Don't be afraid.

Right. No wonder
Clark's been avoiding me.

I am losing touch with fantasy
without even realizing it.

The last thing Clark feels
when he thinks about you is boredom.

Maybe I'm doing this to myself.

You know, maybe it's a deep-rooted fear
of intimacy.

Maybe I'm not letting loose,
because every time I do...

...things fall apart.

My therapist was right. I used to have
these fantasies about Clark.

And now,
not so much as a dirty limerick.

Maybe you just need to calm down
and focus on your work.

Oh, sorry.

You're right.

And maybe you should take advantage
of being immersed in your element.

Get your hands off of the digital world
and onto some hunky human fantasy...

...for a change. Have a little fun.
One of us should.

- All right.
- Good.

Now, I have to go make a call.

Promise me you're gonna kick
the CrackBerry to the curb.

I promise.

Okay.

Can't believe I'm doing this.

Whoa!

"With angels' might."

Warrior Angel was really just the kid?

Uh-oh.

Are you okay?

- Lois.
Clark. Where are you?

Look, I'm sorry. I'm late.

But I guess I got caught up
with some chores.

- I'm in the truck on the way there now.
Oh, good.

Can you grab something from my place
while you're at it?

- Check in the closet.
- Sure.

Like you said, I'm already late, so....

I'm cashing in a rain check.
You cannot renege on a rain check.

Can I rain check on your rain check?
No.

You've been cashing in
so many rain checks lately...

...that I am soaking wet
with disappointment.

Luckily, I'm driving by the Talon
right now, Lois. What do you need?

- What was that whooshing sound?
- Nothing.

I just had the truck window open.

Okay, this is what I got:
Some red leather thing.

Nope.

- Salute the flag?
- Less gabbing, more grabbing.

French-maid outfit?

Need-to-know basis.

There's a garment bag.

Finally. There you go.
Now, that wasn't so hard, was it?

- Yeah, piece of cake.
You're my hero.

After that heroic hit-and-run...

...it would be hard for even the most
distressed damsel not to take offense.

What would a hero say?

You're welcome, citizen.

Uh, and you left a not-so-subtle trail
of breadcrumbs on your way over here.

I'm sorry.

This is all kind of new to me.
I didn't realize how fast I was.

No sonic boom.
So not that fast, I guess.

Did you wanna...?

What?

Oh, ha.

Um....

Not very heroic.

Good street look, though.

Uh-huh. Well, look,
whether you feel like it or not...

...I know a superhero when I see one.

I'm sort of in the business
of helping superheroes.

I don't think anyone's dad
talked about that on Career Day.

- Are you for real?
- Yeah, I'm about as real as it gets.

Chloe Sullivan.

Stephen Swift.

- Ow!
- Sorry.

Maybe we can talk about
how you fit in...

...among the world's finest
over coffee sometime.

That sounds pretty cool.

Great.

So did you wanna
get that coffee now, or...?

Now? Uh, yeah. Okay.

I mean, if you're not doing anything.

Yeah.

Ladies first.

Bill.
- Come on, man.

You only get to frown when you've been
sweating like a pot roast all afternoon.

I'm sorry, Lois, I just don't get all this.
The colors, the costumes.

Everyone has a popcorn image
of what being a hero's about.

It's called a fantasy, Clark. An escape.

Something, I don't know, more magical
than what we have in our normal lives.

The reality of being a hero...

...is about sacrifice, responsibility
and accountability.

From what I've heard.

Did you and Chloe
both just swear off whimsy?

Was there a memo?

Look, a costume
isn't just about hiding who you are...

...it's about seeing the world
in a way that you haven't before.

What's your dream?
Getting swept away in a little fantasy...

...might do you some good
every once in a while.

Lady's got a point.

Without a dash of fantasy, life's just life.
And where's the magic in that?

- Zatanna, when did you...?
- We need to talk, Blue. Alone.

I hope it's okay
that I borrow him for a bit.

Lois, Zatanna. Zatanna, Lois.

Not exactly what I meant
about being swept away.

I shouldn't be surprised that you decided
to follow in your father's footsteps.

A lot can change in a year.

Somehow I don't think you detoured
your roadshow to play catch-up.

I found out
my late great father got cocky...

...and went on a cursing spree
in his roaring 20s.

I have been cleaning up his mess...

...rounding up all the things
that he cursed.

You think this comic book
was one of those items?

It's not as crazy as it sounds.
According to my dad's journal...

...our thief is bound to be feeling
the effects of true power.

Just like in the comic.

I'm normally a solo act...

...but these things
never seem to end well.

And I can't think of anyone better
to help me with this than you.

Hey, come on.
Hey, buddy, wait your turn.

Would you excuse me one moment?

Back of the line, buddy.

Lois, why are you
in the men's bathroom?

You obviously haven't seen the line
for the women's room.

- Lois.
Just a minute.

- Stop gawking and prosper.
- That's what was in your bag?

Well, this Amazon princess
won't get nerd-walled again.

I still don't understand how this qualifies
as Amazon, but whatever.

While I was waiting for you
to drag your heels across the county...

...a story finally happened
right under my nose.

- Someone stole...
- A rare Warrior Angel comic book.

I know. My friend Zatanna told me.
She's into antiquities.

She has a few leads that
she wants me to help her track down.

I'll bet you do.

- No, Lois, it's not like that.
- No, I get it.

You mind if I get a picture with you?

Take a picture?

We'll cover more ground
if we split up anyway, right?

How...?

My caramel java-chip white-chocolate
mocha has three shots in it, right?

Yeah.
- Great.

- And for you, sir?
- A glass of milk would be great.

I mean, coffee.

Dark, black, please.

Everything okay?

Yeah. It's just strong, is all.

If I'm gonna help you get acclimated,
I need to ask you...

You really know superheroes?

Yeah. Now, let's just focus on...
All of them?

Most of them, I guess.

What?

You know actual superheroes,
and you couldn't sound more bored.

- That's... That's amazing, is what it is.
- Well, it's a living.

Can you at least tell me
which heroes you know?

Don't. That would compromise
their identities.

I can't believe I asked that.

Let's focus
on what makes Stephen Swift so super.

So were you exposed to meteor rock?
Or maybe you were born this way.

That would make you Metahuman.
Or maybe you're from space.

That last one was a joke.

Kind of. Oh, God, you're not actually
from space, are you?

No. Just...

Sorry.

I'm an orphan.

And I got sent to Metropolis
to live with my aunt when I was...

...little.

And then a couple weeks ago,
I got caught in a....

In a chemical fire.
And, well, here we are.

- It's common to the archetype.
- Yeah. I thought I was the expert.

Cry to his mama
because he lost his bike.

Give it back. Come on.
I need that to get home.

And who's gonna stop me?

Excuse me, Miss Sullivan.

Ow! Ah! Stop it.

You heard the man. Leave him be.

What you're doing to this kid here
isn't right, and it isn't fair.

And he shouldn't let you
get away with it, not ever.

Mind your own business.

I'll give you something to laugh about.

No.

- No, no, no.
- Apologize!

Okay. Okay. I'm sorry. Just...

I'll give it back. Just put me down.

- Everybody, home, now.
Come on!

It hurts.

Thanks, mister.

Sorry. I just had to save the day.

So, what's next?

Sorry my locator spell
wasn't more accurate.

Like I said,
I need all the help I can get.

We should be close?

I guess you can't expect magic
to be an exact science.

Was that a clever play on words?
Wonderful wit and sparkling theatrics.

Mr. Blur's really upped his game.

Found it.

I always knew you were packing
some heavy artillery under that tie...

...but seeing through walls,
well, that's a showstopper.

- All in a day's work, I guess.
- Wait.

With powers like yours...

...how can you possibly say,
"All in a day's work"?

I don't really think about it.

Being like this
is almost like breathing now.

And with a gift like that
comes responsibilities.

Exactly.

I've spent so much time
trying to do what's right...

...that I guess I haven't had any time
for anything but reality.

And these people,
out here with their capes...

...I don't know, they just don't get it.

But....

Right there with you.

Magic. Fantasy.
It's all in a day's work.

Day in, day out.

What I create
as everyone else's fantasies...

...has become so normal.

I suppose even the illusionists
can become disillusioned.

But, hey, at least you have that
fiery spacetrooper to stargaze with...

...at the end of the day.

Yeah, well,
based on my last relationship...

...I'm afraid I'm keeping Lois
at arm's length.

You're afraid
that if you let that spark ignite...

...you're gonna get burned again.

Right now, everything's under control.

Fantasy isn't about being in control...

...and fire doesn't always have to burn,
you know.

Maybe what you need
is a tiny moment of true fantasy...

...to remind you
what sparks are all about.

I'm good, thanks.

No.

No, you're not.

Sparks lead to flames,
and fire is what keeps us alive.

Now....

I can't do this.

That's a shame.

I think we found a mouth
more magical than mine.

- See you later.
- Thank you.

- Hey.
- Oliver, what's up?

Me? Just owed Lois
some Sharks tickets.

But you, buddy...

...you may be bulletproof, but you may
wanna duck and cover in there.

Good luck.

Hey.

So your friend Zatanna,
what was she dressed up as, anyway?

- That's just how she dresses, so....
- Of course it is.

Lois, you don't have anything
to worry about with Zatanna.

Of course I don't. Wanna know why?
Jealous women worry.

Me? Not jealous. Not even a little.

See, I know that I have nothing
to worry about...

...because Clark Kent,
he is the most honest man that I know.

So if anything were to happen
between the farm boy...

...and Lady Fishnets...

...Lois Lane would be the first to know
about it, not the last, right?

Well, you can tell your supervisor
that I find it highly ironic...

...that I can't find anyone
worth talking to in Missing Persons.

When did we drift from missing comic
to Missing Persons?

We course-corrected
when our thief's aunt filed a report.

Aunt? How old is our thief?

Meet Alec Abrams,
our preteen, pre-convict.

He's been AWOL
ever since he stole the book.

Not that I can blame him.
It's worth thousands of dollars.

- The cops are looking for him.
- Police are the least of his worries.

- We need to find him as soon as we can.
- Don't think I haven't been trying.

His ID was flagged in
the Planet database as a potential story.

He kept sending letters to the post office
addressed to the Blur.

"Your world
is so much better than mine."

I wish I could be a hero
so I wouldn't get bullied at school.

I wish I could be a hero like you
so I could've saved my parents.

"I used to think heroes weren't real
until you showed up."

Looks like our little juvie
is in desperate need for a Big Brother.

He's just looking for someone
to understand what he's going through.

Goal. Kick save.

Nice save.

Kick save.

I don't get why you didn't wanna
come here. This place is awesome.

It's way cooler than my room.

I mean, my pad.

You know,
I must've gotten my signals mixed.

I certainly didn't think
this is what you meant...

...when you said
you wanted to come upstairs.

- Why do you keep doing that?
- Doing what?

You keep trying not to smile
like the whole night.

We're having fun, right?

Uh. Sure, I guess.

You guess? Come on, get up here.

No. I've never even touched Lois' Xbox.
I would look ridiculous.

That's the whole point.

Maybe you need to look ridiculous.
When's the last time you had any fun?

- I have lots of fun.
Just tell me when...

...and you can keep watching me
have all the fun you're not having.

All right, fine. Look, if I get up, do you
promise to answer all my questions?

Cross my heart.

Restart.

Get ready.

Oh, jeez.

Goal. Nice. Kick save. Nice save.

All right, a deal's a deal.
Powers. What's under the hood?

Oh, you know,
your standard super-speed...

...enhanced strength,
augmented hearing.

I like to call it Angel Hearing.
But I think that's it.

- How about flight?
- What? Why would you think I could...?

Holy crap. I can fly?

Holy crap! I can fly!

Oh!

Come on.

We have to give this a whirl.

What happens if I fall?

Don't worry.

I'll catch you.

- So you got caught up in the moment.
- Under magical duress.

I was just trying
to give you some perspective, Clark.

Even though we live lives that everyone
else thinks are fantastic, doesn't mean...

...we don't get to take a break
from the real world now and then.

We don't get to take breaks.

Which is why us Super Friends
gotta stick together.

I think I have a spell for that.

Am I interrupting something?

- No.
- Yes.

You certainly seem
to be in good spirits.

Yeah, well, I had a really good night
for the first time in a while.

Which is more than I can say
for the two of you.

The company that published
Warrior Angel...

...stole the idea
from a friend of Zatanna's father.

In order to exact
some Old World retribution...

...my father put a curse
on the original comic...

...hoping to teach the publisher
a lesson.

The publisher never opened the comic.

And neither did anyone else.
Not until yesterday.

"Stephen Swift"?

There isn't anything wrong with having
another hero on the street, right?

There is when he's just a kid.

And according to Zatanna's research...

The curse should've turned Alec
into a full-grown hero.

Oh, my God. He is just a boy.

If we figure out
what he looks like as an adult...

...we can use Watchtower
to track him down.

Then I can slap him
with a counter-curse...

...and we'll have him home
by breakfast.

- Chloe?
- I have a few things I need to look into.

I'll let you know if I find anything.

Remember how you said
magic wasn't an exact science?

Well, there's a catch too.

And my dad really outdid himself
on this one.

There's a monster
at the end of the book.

Not surprised your dad's friend
had trouble selling this.

This isn't the origins of a superhero,
it's the birth of a villain.

In the original story,
Warrior Angel becomes Devilicus.

And the moment our hero feels
the slightest bit betrayed....

He becomes a monster.

I got a bunch of games you might like.
We could order pizza or... What's wrong?

I know your real secret. I know
that you stole a cursed comic book...

...and that's how you got your powers.
I know you're younger than you look.

Well, it was just an accident.
I had to look inside.

And now I'm finally a hero,
and I won't go back.

My friend can reverse this curse.

I just wanted to get to you first
so you wouldn't freak out.

- We're gonna get you back to normal.
- Normal?

Normal means being wailed on
at school every day.

Normal means not having the power
to defend myself.

Do you have any idea
how much my actual life sucked?

This is everything I ever wanted.
No one can ever hurt me again.

But this isn't real, Alec. You're gonna
find a way to get through this, okay?

That's what being a kid is all about.
Now, you just calm down.

My name is not Alec.
This is who I am now.

And I won't go back.

You can't make me.

No one can.

I have a feeling no one's gonna
push me around ever again.

We're a little late to the party.
You find that guest of honor yet?

The computer's doing
a facial-recognition search...

...based on the age progression
from Alec's photo.

Abracadabra.

Chloe?

Why didn't she say something?

If you found out
your hero was really a 12-year-old...

...how would you have reacted?

If I were Chloe, I'd try to fix it myself.

Wait. No!

Let me go! Put me down!

Please tell me
your counter-curse is ready to go.

As ready as it's gonna be.

Bring our girl home.

Sins of the father shall not be repeated

Tell me where your friend is
so I can stop her.

I don't wanna hurt you, Chloe.

But I will if I need to.

Think this through.

You wanna be a hero, right?
This isn't something a hero would do.

Lethal enforcers
are way more interesting.

- They were big in the '90s.
- That's Alec talking. You're still in there.

Think about your parents, Alec.

- You think...?
- You don't know anything...

...about my parents,
and you don't know anything about me.

Sins of the father.

- What is that?
Shall not be repeated.

- Sins of the father shall not be repeated.
- Do you hear that?

Sins of the father shall not be repeated.

Innocence lost is once again found

You all right?

It was just an accident.

Everything's gonna be okay.

How's Chloe?

She's been better.

I'm sorry.

I don't know what happened.

I've never felt like a... Like a...

Like a bully before?

Yeah.

No one starts out
wanting to be the bad guy.

Life can be pretty hard on you
sometimes, huh?

The test of a true hero...

...is not letting the sadness
and the loneliness take over.

Especially when
you have superpowers.

Especially.

Just because you can do something
doesn't mean you should.

That sounds hard.

- It is.
- So why do you do it?

I do it because I wanna help people.

Like you.

Not because I have to,
but because I choose to.

What do I do now?

You...

...should go home and be a kid.
Remember...

...the next time you run into a bully
that there is some goodness in there.

- Because everyone's worth saving.
- And a hero's work is never done.

Before I go,
I wanna give you something.

I wrote this
when you were still Red and Blue.

And I didn't really know
what you looked like then, so....

I like the S better.

I do too.

Is that him?

Oh, thank God.

I could swear there's a twinkle of magic
in your eyes.

Or is it just pride in a job well done?

I think I always gain a bit of perspective
when you blow through town.

Careful. A girl might just start
to crush on you.

Are you sure
we can't keep this team-up rolling?

You've saved me more than once now,
and I'd love to return the favor.

- As flattered as I am...
I'll be right with you.

Come on.

... think I'm interested
in finding my fantasy somewhere else.

Must be love.

Make sure she knows
just how lucky she is, Clark.

Hey.

I don't know how many wands
she had to wave...

...but your lady magician managed
to get the charges dropped against Alec.

It helps that she knew the family
of the original author.

But, listen, about Zatanna, Lois, I...

Let me preface this by saying
that she is just a friend.

Spit it out, Clark.

When we were tracking down a lead
for the comic, which was the truth...

...her and I got to talking about the fact
that she was really stressed out.

I got caught up
in my stuff so much...

...that I didn't realize
she had gotten so close to me.

She kissed me,
but it's not what I meant to happen.

Honest.

I was wondering
how long it would take you to fess up.

For a guy without a single poker face,
you've got a million tells.

And you wouldn't look me in the eye.
And you smelled like a magazine insert.

Well, let me assure you
that this will never happen again.

Lois, it's just this whole thing with us,
it's new to me right now.

Yeah. It's new for me too.

Do you think that I like being insecure?

I don't.
I just have to get used to the reality...

...that I'm not the only gal
that thinks you're fantastic.

Well, this isn't the reaction I expected.

Expect the unexpected?

That look on your face,
remember how that feels...

...the next time
one of your sexy lady friends...

...invades your personal space.

I'm gonna finish my apology now.

At the end of the Con every year,
there's a, um, costume ball.

- You hate costumes.
- Yes.

But I was rethinking what I said
about not understanding...

...fantasy, and, uh....

You asked me what my dream was,
and it's this.

With you, Lois.

Now, that, my friend, is an apology.

I get to pick out your costume.

Slow night?

Figured I'd squeeze in
some target practice.

And a single malt.

Did you bring enough
for the rest of the class?

Yeah, help yourself, professor.

Running a little light
on allegory tonight.

Bumpy day?

Not the smoothest.

Someone asked me when the last time
I had a good time was...

...and I didn't have an answer.

I don't think anyone can fault you
for being on edge, Chloe.

I mean, hell, if anyone can relate,
it's me. I get it.

Yeah, you can.

You know...

...sometimes you gotta take your fun
where you can get it.

And sometimes
it's right in front of your face.

You just have to wanna see it.

Come on.

How do I know when to let go?

It's all about your heart.

Just listen...

...right there in between the beats.

That's when you let go.