Sister, Sister (1994–1999): Season 4, Episode 21 - Slime Party - full transcript

Man on TV: Now for

our next question.

In the old testament

- what monument was constructed
- to reach directly to heaven?

Tower of babel.

Woman: Tower of babel.

Man: That's correct!

Now for a toughy.

What is the name of america's

first written constitution?

Woman: Uh, uh...



The mayflower compact.

- Woman: The mayflower compact?
- Man: Right again!

Tia, you are

a human answering machine.

Man, I love this show.

We should be on it.

Come on, tamera

slime party is just

this lame little game show.

Trinidad and Tobago.

Man: Oh, I'm sorry.

- The correct answer
- is "Trinidad and Tobago."

Slime her!

Woman: I meant



Trinidad and Tobago! No!

Oh, I love this show!

- I bet Darryl haver
- would notice me

If I was on TV.

- Well, tamera,
- he didn't notice you

When you "accidentally" tripped

at school, fell in front of him

and held on to his legs.

- Sure, he did. He said, - "girl, what's wrong with you?
- Get away from me."

Oh, he is so gorgeous.

He's a senior.

Seniors don't watch TV?

We've got to get on this show!

Tamera, the show's there,

and we're here.

So get over it.

- Man: Next
- week's slime party

Is pulling into america's

motor city, Detroit.

- Okay, b... but they're not going
- to pick us.

Man: And we're looking

for teenagers just like you!

- Okay, okay, okay, but they're
- still not going to pick us.

- Man: And we're
- looking for twins!

- They're going to pick us!
- I love this show!

♪ Talk about

a two-way twister ♪

♪ shakin' up the family tree

with sibling synchronicity ♪

♪ never knew

how much I missed ya ♪

♪ I ain't ever

gonna let you go! ♪

♪ Never knew

how much I missed ya ♪

♪ I ain't ever

gonna let you go! ♪

Oh, come on, tamera!

Will you sit down and relax?

I can't relax, Tia.

- Getting on this show
- is way too important.

Ooh! Here comes why.

Is my part straight?

- See any split ends?
- Anything in my teeth?

No!

Hi, Darryl.

Oh, hi, um...

- -Tamera.
- -Right, tamera, right.

So, you free Saturday at 8:00?

- -Why? -'Cause I'll be on slime
- party .

Tamera!

-Well, I might!

And I want you to watch.

- I guess I could
- flip back and forth

Between you and wrestling.

Oh, you won't have to.

- I can get you in to see
- the show.

Tamera!

Well, I could!

So, what do you say?

Whatever.

Oh!

"Whatever."

Whoa. That is a big step up

from "get away from me."

We've got to get on!

Tia, I'm counting on you.

I know you'll nail

every single question.

And I got your back

- just in case they get
- into my area of expertise.

Well, thanks, tamera,

but I don't think

- they're going to ask
- coolio's favorite color,

Coolio's favorite soup,

or favorite day of the week.

Orange, cream of broccoli,

and Thursday.

See? I'm a cooliologist.

I got a dangerous mind.

Hey, ladies.

Twin interviews start yet?

Roger, what are you up to?

Say hello

to my twin brother, dodger.

- We discovered
- each other in the mall.

Hey, that's our story.

- Oh, like it couldn't happen
- twice.

- Roger, you're never
- going to pull this off.

Oh, yeah? Watch this.

Dodger, what is the value

of pi to the fifth decimal?

3.14159.

Dap me, bro.

Nice try, guys, but, hey.

You're once, twice,

two times the loser.

Bye.

Next.

Uh, excuse me, Hank.

I'm Roger, and this is dodger.

- I hear you're looking
- for twins.

I am. Go home, Roger.

I think it's an outrage!

- Banning adults
- from a slime party audience

Like that. It can't be legal.

I got to be there.

I know what. I'll wear

those hip-hoppy clothes.

I can look 18.

Yeah, in dog years.

The girls don't want us

- hovering over them
- on their big day.

Stop being such a baby.

I am not being a baby.

I just want to go!

You guys, Tia was great!

She aced the practice round.

Oh, come on, tamera.

- Anyone could have worn out
- the answer buzzer. Twice!

Oh, we're so happy

for you girls.

Aren't we, ray?

Yeah, happy, see?

- Mom, you'll never guess
- who we're playing against.

Both: The Olsen twins!

From full house.

We finally get to meet

real-life celebrities.

Whoa, that sure is exciting.

You know, nothing like seeing

real-life celebrities

in real life.

- Think you can score
- an extra ticket?

Oh, I already did.

-Really?

-Yeah, and I gave it to Darryl.

- He said if the pistons
- have a 30-point lead

By the fourth quarter,

he might even show up.

He's really starting

to like me.

- Ray, ray, ray, give it up.
- You're not getting in.

- Just stay home
- and watch the show with me.

- Tamera's going - to be all excited
- And everything.

She's gonna need her daddy.

- What she needs
- is for you to leave her be.

Ray, tamera's growing up.

She's got her own life.

You should get one, too.

- Your whole life
- revolves around that girl.

You need a few buddies.

- I've got buddies,
- lots of buddies!

Who?

Well, uh, Tia and I

have become very chummy

in the last four years.

Someone your own age?

Well, that's, uh, there's

my buddy Steve, next door.

He moved to Belgium last year.

Well, how about Bob,

the dispatcher at work?

He dead.

I've got buddies, bub.

- Believe me, I've got buddies,
- plenty of buddies.

Hey, buddy! Good to see you!

Milt!

I love this guy.

- You know, we should
- get together more often, buddy.

- Well, I'm here every day
- around this time.

Don't you love him?

No, I'm talking about

maybe go bowling,

go fishing, play cards.

I'll check my date book.

I'm sure I can squeeze you in.

Buddy.

- Oh, be his buddy.
- Please be his buddy.

Well, I guess it won't kill me.

- Oh, good, 'cause once
- his daughter leaves home,

- I'll be the only buddy
- he's got around here

And trust me,

we are not going there.

This is so cool.

We made it to slime party.

Oh, my gosh, I see Darryl!

He actually came!

- How's my lipstick?
- Too much, too little, too red?

Hi, Darryl! Yoo-hoo!

Tamera, calm down.

- You're bouncing off these walls
- like a ball of nutty putty.

Just relax.

I'm relaxed. I'm calm. I'm...

Oh, my god!

It's... it's them!

You're the Olsen twins.

You got it, dude.

Hey. I'm Tia,

and this is my sister, tamera.

Let me guess,

let me guess, let me guess!

You're Mary-Kate,

and you're Ashley.

Uh, no.

- Well, you would be
- if you changed places.

Come on, tamera.

I apologize for my sister.

- She's just
- a little over excited.

Oh, that's okay.

We're going to beat

their little twin butts.

Now, come on, tamera,

you have got to chill.

I'm sorry.

- I'm just not used
- to meeting famous people.

They're even cuter

in person, aren't they?

Yeah, and nice, too.

Yeah. We're going to beat

their little twin butts.

- -Ray?
- -What's up?

What are you doing?

- Lisa, my little girl's
- going to be on television.

I want to get it on tape.

- Just in case the VCR breaks,
- I got it on backup.

- What if there's
- a power failure?

- You're right.
- I got to get down there.

Ray, ray, sit down.

I'm just joking.

- Everything's
- going to be just fine.

Hey, Lisa! How you doing?

How's it going, ray?

Milt, buddy, uh,

what are you doing here?

- We were supposed
- to get together.

Yeah, well, that's the 17th.

Today's the 17th.

Come on in, guys.

I invited a few other buddies.

- I met them
- at gamblers anonymous.

Come on, guys.

Let's play poker.

Uh, guys, uh, milt, look.

This is a little awkward,

but I'm kind of busy here.

Ray. This is why you

have no buddies.

Let them stay.

- You can keep one eye
- on the TV.

- Did I miss anything?
- The power went out at my house.

What?

Oh! Our TV is okay.

Thank goodness. Whoo!

Why? What are we watching?

Oh, very exciting game.

Pistons or the red wings?

- Man on TV: Coming up next
- is slime party.

Man: One minute to air, people!

Tamera, you okay?

Sure. Sure. Why do you ask?

- You're cutting
- the circulation to my hand,

- And I kind of need it
- for the buzzer.

Oh, I'm sorry.

- I'm just a little nervous.
- Do I look okay?

- Do these pants make
- my butt look chunky?

Oh, my gosh.

Am I getting a zit?

No! No, tamera.

You look fine.

Don't be so nervous.

- -Okay.
- -We're in this together.

I'll answer all the questions,

and you just stand here

and smile for Darryl.

Oh. I can do that.

And he can see us.

Well, girls, this is it.

You're not nervous, are you?

Nervous? Hello!

- I'm the one who aced
- the practice rounds, remember?

- Yeah, you can't
- rattle her, Hank.

- She's a quiz whiz,
- so bring it on.

- -You're pretty confident, huh?
- Tia: Yeah.

- You might want
- to hold on to that.

You see that little red light?

- -Yeah.
- -Yeah.

- When it goes on,
- over 15 million people

Are going to be

watching you live.

You have a good show, babe.

- Hank: Hey, everybody!
- There's a party in the house.

What kind of party?

Crowd: A slime party!

Hey. I'm Hank brannen.

- We're coming to you live
- from Detroit

- Where it's twin week
- on slime party.

- Tonight, local twins,
- Tia Landry and tamera Campbell

- Take on our special
- celebrity guest twins.

- You loved them
- as TV's Michelle.

- How about a big hand
- for Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen.

- And now,
- let's introduce our players.

Hi. I'm Ashley.

Hi. I'm Mary-Kate.

Hi. I'm tamera.

Hi. I'm... f-f-

15 million?

My name is... t-t-t...

Uh! Your name is t-uh.

Well, tamera and t-t-t-uh.

- Here are the ru-ru-rules
- for this round.

- Each question
- is worth ten points.

First team to 30 points,

wins this round.

And someone

on the losing team gets...

Crowd: Slimed!

- No, Tia, I don't want
- to get slimed.

I got a guy out there. Wake up!

Okay, first question:

- "What is the chemical symbol
- for water?"

-H2o.

-That's right, for ten points.

Next question:

"Who is the father

of frozen foods?"

-Clarence birdseye.

Very good, Mary-Kate.

Look at the Olsen twins

with 20 points.

How the heck

did they get so smart?

- When I was ten,
- I could barely write my name.

Tia, snap out of it.

"In the year 1836, the fight

for Texas independence

was identified

by what famous battle cry?"

-Remember the alamo?

That's correct, Mary-Kate!

Uh-oh.

You know what that music means.

- Poor tamera is going
- to have to pay

For her sister's mistakes.

Pay? So soon?

Maybe I could just run a tab.

- I'm sorry, but I'll tell you
- what I can do.

How about a nice, cool

glass of juice?

Oh, that'll be great, Hank.

You hold this.

- You don't mind
- squeezing your own?

I guess not.

Now see, the oranges

come out there.

All you have to do is grab them

and fill up your glass.

What's the catch, Hank?

You can't use your hands!

Roll 'em.

- Tamera,
- you're pretty good at this.

Crank it up!

Ray: What's going on here?

What they doing to her?

Pathetic. Boy, dodger and me

- would have whupped those
- little Olsen girls by now.

What's with this Hank weasel?

- It's like he enjoys
- embarrassing my little girl.

- Yo, Hank, what do you
- say I come down there

- And put some sprinkles
- where the moon don't shine?

Tamera, your sister

doesn't seem to know

much of anything.

She's letting you

down big-time.

Who you telling?

-Queen Isabella of Spain!

Oh, shut up.

Excuse me, Hank.

Could we give Tia and tamera

ten of our points?

Yeah. We kind of feel

sorry for them.

What a sweet idea.

- Now, too bad
- it's against the rules.

But wasn't that nice

- of Mary-Kate and Ashley,
- audience?

So now, let's move

on to the stickiest, ickiest,

- going-to-make-you-sickiest
- part of our show,

The banana split bonus round.

You ready, girls?

Tia, pay attention.

Answer some questions,

can't you?

My child is doing fine.

She's warming up, so back off!

Come on, do it for mama!

All right. "A straight line

which bisects a circle

is called the..."

-Diameter.

"What was Mark twain's

real name?"

-Samuel clemens.

"The capital of Arkansas is..."

-Little rock. Sorry.

Thanks a lot, Tia.

Come on, please talk to me.

Oh, now you want to talk?

- Where were you
- before I got dumped

In the pudding pit?

- Tia, I depended on you,
- and you let me down.

Tamera, I am so sorry.

- I don't know
- why I choked out there.

- I guess I'm just
- a little camera-shy.

"Camera-shy"?

You were in a camera coma.

There was a long

stretch out there, Tia,

- where you weren't
- taking any calls,

You know what I'm saying?

-I was scared, okay?

-Well, I was humiliated!

- I didn't think when
- Darryl finally noticed me

- I'd be wearing a
- chocolate overcoat.

What about me, tamera?

- It was embarrassing
- for me, too.

I have friends watching.

I'm supposed to be smart

- and I couldn't answer
- a single question.

Ashley: Excuse me.

Oh, man, it's not bad enough

to be publicly humiliated.

Now we get caught fighting

in front of TV's Michelle.

Don't be embarrassed.

- Yeah. We just want
- to give some advice.

- Oh, please.
- I've seen full house.

- I know
- what you're going to say.

- "Love your sister
- no matter what

- 'cause nothing's more important
- than family." Right?

Well, actually,

that wasn't the advice

we were going for.

Then, what were you

going to tell us?

When you hit the buzzer

try to answer the question.

Don't just stand

there like a boob.

- 'Cause they're going
- to keep sliming her.

Don't you get it?

Hey, tamera, you thinking

what I'm thinking?

- Let's go throw 'em
- in the pudding?

No, tamera.

Look, we shouldn't be fighting.

I know how important

this was to you, and...

I'm sorry I let you down.

Oh, Tia.

I kind of let you down, too.

- You were really
- nervous out there

- And I didn't say
- anything to help.

- Of course,
- my lungs were filling up

With tapioca at the time.

Man: Two minutes, everyone.

Um, listen. Tell you what.

This round,

you take the buzzer,

and I'll take the beating.

You'd do that for me?

Sure, it's the least I can do.

It was my fault

you got humiliated

in front of Darryl.

Darryl... guess I'll

never see him again.

You know what they say,

- "guys don't make passes
- at girls in molasses."

I'm sorry, tamera.

I'll go change, okay?

Psst.

Hey, tamera.

Darryl.

- I just snuck back here
- to tell you

- You looked really stupid
- out there.

You noticed, huh?

Man, you have got a good

sense of humor, girl,

I like that.

- Most girls I know
- are too hung up on their looks

To swan-dive into desserts.

- -Oh, really?
- -Yeah.

Well, not this gal.

Looks don't matter to me.

- I mean, I get dressed
- in the dark.

What do I care? I'm a nut!

- You are too crazy,
- you are too funny.

Would you, uh...

Maybe like to go out

with me sometime?

Sure. You ready?

- Don't you have
- to finish the show first?

- I was kidding. Sense of humor,
- remember?

Right, right, right.

I'll walk you to your seat.

What's that sound?

- It's just pudding
- in my shoes.

- Man on TV: Slime party
- will be right back.

- Roger,
- you're not deserting us, too?

- Watching this show's
- making me hungry.

Who wants pudding?

- Who can eat
- at a time like this?

Yeah. Make mine butterscotch.

You got it.

- Ray, it is so hard watching
- our children take a beating.

Yes, it is, but it's good

to have a buddy

at a time like this.

- What buddy?
- All your buddies bolted.

Well, not all of them.

Oh... all right.

I guess I kind of do like

that we're friends.

Say, buddy...

Can I have $100?

No.

- I knew this friendship
- wouldn't last.

-Welcome back.

- I see Tia and tamera
- have switched places.

- I don't think
- it's going to help, do you?

Crowd: No!

Ready, girls?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Let's just get this

over with, Hank.

- Okay, it's time
- for our final round

Where each correct answer

is worth 25 points.

- But don't get your hopes up,
- you probably don't know anything

- About this category, either:
- Coolio!

Oh, man.

-First question...

Coolio's birth name

was artis ivey!

Uh... yes, for 25 points.

- Hank: Okay, okay, here's one
- that's a little harder.

-Coolio's dog's name...?

Fernix! F-e-r-n-i-x!

-He's a German Shepherd, Hank!

Right again.

- Coolio ties
- a flawless windsor knot

And collects shake-'em-up

snow globes.

Thanks, but I didn't ask.

- Well, that means
- our game is over.

I know it's hard to believe,

- but our winners
- are Tia and tamera!

- Mary-Kate, you don't have
- to be great little detectives

- To figure out somebody here's
- about to get slimed.

- Think he's really
- going to slime us?

Us?

You're the one

in the slime suit.

I just love watching

celebrities get slimed.

Oh, so do we, Hank.

Hey, everybody,

there's a party in the house.

What kind of party is it?

Crowd: A slime party!

Tia: You're not going

anywhere, Hank!

Girls: Twins rule!

- Tina: Who-hoo!
- Mary-Kate: Oh, my gosh!

- Roger,
- you're not deserting us at...

- -Camera rolling.
- Man: Do it again.

I'm on that one?

Man: It's Michael.

Five, four, three, two.

- Roger, you're not deserting us
- at a time like this?

- Let's hear it for that reading.
- Boo!