Sister, Sister (1994–1999): Season 4, Episode 17 - Model Tia - full transcript

Huge news!

Tia's met one of the most famous

fashion photographers

- in the world,
- and here he is...

Right in there.

Hello in there.

Oh, I love you, I

love you, I love you.

Tamera!

- See, his name's
- varique Dalton

And I was talking to him



on the Internet for a whole week

- before he told me
- who he was.

- You know, he's
- a really nice guy.

Oh, nice, shmice.

The man's a superstar.

His name is everywhere.

He did...

Perfume for people,

stussy for sassy

and look...

En vogue in vogue!

- Okay, okay, okay,
- I admit it...

It's pretty exciting.

Ooh, ooh! He's



sending a message.

Oh, my gosh.

- Tia, varique
- wants to do

A whole photo shoot

on you tomorrow night...

For free.

Well, aren't you

going to thank me

- for sending
- your picture?

Tamera, I can't believe

you did that.

Well, I can't

believe you didn't.

Tia... he might use you

in one of his ads

- and if he likes
- your looks

I know he's going

to like mine.

What are you talking about?

Well, maybe you

haven't noticed, but...

Strong family resemblance,

good afternoon.

You know, when i'm

a famous supermodel

I'll just call

myself "tamera."

I might as well drop

the "Campbell."

Naomi's using it anyway.

♪ Talk about a

two-way twister ♪

♪ shakin' up the family tree

with sibling synchronicity ♪

♪ never knew how

much I missed ya ♪

♪ I ain't ever gonna

let you go! ♪

♪ Never knew

how much I missed ya ♪

♪ I ain't ever gonna

let you go ♪

What you think?

What's all the yelling?

Oh, you.

Oh, you.

Hey, looks like

somebody was hit

by the soul train.

- Oh, this is
- for our girlfriend hildred's

Annual '70s party in the 'hood...

"ya bump till ya slump."

Girl, this year we goin' win

her tired old dance contest.

Yeah, we bus stoppin'

to victory.

- Hey!
- Hey!

Thanks to our neighborhood

bus stop king, wydell Jenkins.

Oh! Honey,

that man can dance.

Really? You know

I was a pretty good dancer

myself back in the day.

- Yes sirree, in high school
- they called me

"the funky chicken champ."

You sure it wasn't

"the funky chicken chump?"

Hello.

Oh, hey, wydell!

What's the good word?

Oh, no, wydell.

That's a bad word.

Oh, no, wydell.

Oh, my, wydell.

Well, why, wydell?

Oh.

Bye, wydell.

Let me guess...

That was wydell.

Yeah. He can't make it

to the party tonight.

- Oh, no.
- What happened?

He was doing the bus stop

on the dining room table.

- He did one
- of those cartwheels

Got his bell bottoms caught

in the ceiling fan.

- He spun around upside down for
- four hours

Before a nice jehovah's witness

came along and cut him down.

- Well, girl,
- what we goin' do?

- Now, it might take
- two to tango

- But it takes three
- to bus stop.

Ray...

Do you love me?

Oh, no.

Don't even think about it.

- Lisa, why you
- want to drag

- That big old fun-sucker
- to a party?

Patrice, do you want

to beat hildred's

bus stop Booty or not?

Oh, yeah, but...

All right.

- I got through
- childbirth.

I guess I can get

through tonight.

Now, ray, I never ask

you for anything...

Except maybe a roof

over my head

and help putting a little

food on the table...

So I think you

owe me a favor.

Okay, okay, I'll do it.

Under one condition:

Somewhere at that bus stop

we find a place for a little

funky chicken solo.

Yeah. Woo!

- Tia:
- You know that guy

I've been talking to

on the Internet?

It turns out he's this big,

important photographer

and he wants to meet me tonight!

- Tia, get your photographer
- to hook me up

- With that honey on page 12
- in Victoria's secret.

I called their 800 number

and she wouldn't even

come to the phone.

Tia, this is so cool.

You could get discovered.

You really think so, guys?

- I mean, am I pretty enough
- to be a model?

Who you asking?

- All:
- Peace.

Bye, guys.

Well, good luck.

Modeling's a rough racket.

What would you know about it?

Hey, I been there.

I was butterball's chubby baby

boy of 1981.

But by 1982,

I couldn't even get arrested.

Okay.

Tia, I am so excited.

Hey, you think when

we're famous models

we should live in

New York or Paris?

I'll give you a hint...

I love French fries.

- Tamera, look, I really want
- to go tonight, but...

I knew there was

a "but" coming.

It always shows up,

regular as a train.

- But-but-but-
- but-but-but-but

- butbut-but-but-
- but-but-but-but.

Tamera, tamera, I'm sorry,

but I just think

it'll be a great idea

to run it by our folks first.

No, it wouldn't.

It'll be a very,

very bad idea.

Because parents say no.

Now, when I say no,

it doesn't matter.

Like I'm saying no right now,

and are you listening?! No!

Tamera, our parents

are not going to say no.

We'll just explain

how important it is to us.

- Look, I'm sure
- they'll be very supportive.

- No!
- No!

Is it me, or are they

not being supportive?

- He asked you
- for your picture, Tia?

- I'm going to have him
- checked out.

- Dad, your afro's
- on backwards.

Oh.

You guys, varique Dalton

is the real deal.

- We looked him up
- on the web.

Mom, he's very sweet.

- I've been talking to him
- for weeks

- And I feel
- like I really know him.

But you don't, baby.

- Now I brought you up
- to think the best of people

- And I love that about you, but
- some people in this world

Just don't deserve

that kind of trust.

Oh, ray, now that

thing's on sideways.

But you guys

Tia's got a chance

to be rich and famous.

I can't believe you're

standing in my way.

I mean... her way.

Oh, for heaven's sakes, dad.

Mom, look...

I have to be there tonight.

It's the only time

varique can squeeze me in.

- I don't know this
- man from Adam.

- You be out at night
- in a strange neighborhood

- And if you call,
- we might not be home.

I don't want you taking those

kind of chances at your age.

Mom, I'm not a baby.

- Besides, when
- you were my age

- You took chances
- all the time

- Like when you and aunt
- patrice camped out all night

- In front of James
- brown's hotel

- 'cause you heard
- he might come out

To sign a few autographs

and shoot some cars.

And dad

you told me you hitchhiked

across country when you were 18.

Well, honey, I didn't

intend to hitchhike.

I was riding with

my college roomie

and halfway across

Iowa, he threw me out

because according to him,

I wouldn't shut up.

- Girls, I admit that we did
- some crazy things

Back there in the '70s,

but I wouldn't do them today.

That's right.

- I mean, today is a whole 'nother
- bowl of noodles.

Look around you.

- I got a dead bolt on the door,
- a club in the car

And I got a lo-Jack

on the lawn mower.

Today, people are

pretty darn mean.

Tell me about it.

Dad, this is so unfair.

You guys had your time.

Now it's our time.

Why are you always

so quick to say no?

I'm sorry, tamera.

You're right.

How's this...

N-n-no-o-o-o.

How is that for you?

Now, girls, now I know you think

we're being overprotective

but this is the '90s.

Now good night.

Come on, huggy bear.

Let's hustle.

Night, night, baby.

Yeah, bye.

Man, I can't believe it.

We're missing the chance

of a lifetime, and why?

'Cause we live in the '90s.

- Yeah. Mom and ray
- had it so easy.

Sounds like back in the '70s

kids could just do

anything they wanted.

Anything they wanted.

- ♪ Who was
- bringing up ♪

♪ A groovy

little chick ♪

♪ With her dad

named dick ♪

♪ see, his name

is Raymond ♪

♪ but that's a name

that really didn't rhyme ♪

♪ anyhow, they all hooked up

as a fam'ly ♪

♪ and since they did they've had

a really happenin' time ♪

- ♪ the Campbell-Landry
- bunch ♪

♪ That's the way

they became ♪

All right, soul sister,

groove on this.

Oh, ray!

A new disco ball!

Made it myself.

- Hope you don't
- mind, foxy lady

But I used one

of your earrings.

Hey, dad, can we go dancin'?

Yes!

Can we take the car?

Yes!

- Can we stay out
- till breakfast?

Yes!

Gosh. You guys will say

yes to anything, won't you?

- Yes!
- Yes!

Hey, hey, hey.

Dig the new plats.

Hope you chicks

like 'em tall,

dark and handsome.

Well, two out of three

ain't bad.

Come on, let's go-go.

Oh, by the way

we're going to stop by

this famous photographer's place

so he can turn us

into supermodels.

Is that okay?

Yes! Sure!

You don't even have

to ask our permission.

- We don't?
- We don't?

No way, che.

- Authority
- is meaningless.

Don't listen to the man.

Do your own thing.

Yeah!

Let it all hang out.

Wow.

You two are far out.

Mm-hmm.

- But the one thing
- you must do

Before you set foot

out of this house...

- What's that?
- What's that?

Boogie down!

Boy, were we ever born

in the wrong decade.

All right, that's it.

Tia, I think it's time

for me and you

to do our own thing

and stop letting the man

push us around.

What man?

- Come on, Tia,
- get dressed.

- We're going
- to meet varique.

- Tamera, our parents
- said no!

- I'm not going,
- and you'd better not either.

Oh, Tia, how could I?

You're the one

he wants to meet.

I can't go without you.

Tamera, let's just

forget about it, okay?

No, Tia, I can't.

Look, Tia, you're smart

- and you're going
- to Harvard.

You can do anything

you want in your life.

But what about me?

I got a shot here

to be somebody

and it may be the only

chance I ever get.

- Come on, please,
- help me out.

Tamera, it's too late.

I already e-mailed varique

to cancel the appointment.

I'm sorry.

Well, one good thing

about the '90s

we all know

how to use a computer.

Aw, come on, Melissa.

If you want a part in this movie

you got to come and read for me.

I'm the director.

- Got to jet.
- Do the right thing.

Love, spike Lee.

Coming.

Varique?

That's me.

Hi. I'm t... Tia.

- Yeah. I recognize you
- from your picture.

Well, come on in.

I been waiting for you.

Thanks.

What do you think, Tia?

Tia?

Huh? Oh, me! Oh, I was just

admiring the loft.

Pretty cool.

You like. Well, have a seat.

- Let me get my portfolio out of
- your way.

Oh my gosh. That's Tyra banks!

Yeah.

Halle Berry. You took these

pictures? You're great.

Ah, well, it's what I do.

Hey, where are my manners?

Before we start

how about a drink?

Hot cocoa would be nice.

I was thinking of something

a little stronger.

Okay, well, throw in

a few marshmallows.

Gosh, I think I'm fresh out.

- You're a little nervous,
- aren't you?

Kind of.

Hey, well, don't be.

There's no pressure here.

Just relax, and I promise

to take things slow.

Nice and slow.

Hey, Tia.

Where's your body double?

She's upstairs I think.

What's going on?

- Blood-sucking
- zombie freaks iv

- Is opening tonight
- at a theater near us.

- Tamera's the only
- one I know

Who'll talk back

to the screen with me...

"what's up with you?

- "That door
- didn't open itself.

Run, fool."

I hate it when people

talk back to the screen.

- That's why we
- don't invite you.

- Roger:
- Hey, tamera.

Whoa.

Oh, my gosh.

Uh-oh.

This is just like what happened

- in blood-sucking zombie freaks
- III.

No, no, don't open

that closet door.

Roger...

This place is a mess.

Where did she go?

- You got a large meat locker
- in your basement?

No.

Then your guess

is just as good as mine.

Hey, Tia.

Who's very-cue?

What?

No, no, not "very-cue"...

Varique.

"Hey, varique. Changed my mind.

Meet you tonight at 8:00. Tia."

Don't just stand there.

It's 8:15.

Girlfriend, you're late.

I didn't write that.

She did.

Tamera went to my photo session

as me.

What are you doing?

Getting varique's address.

- I have to drag
- her butt back

Before our parents get home.

- Maybe I should dig up
- my old butterball baby shots

And come with you.

No, thanks.

- Varique has enough
- uninvited guests as it is.

You stay here and

keep our folks busy

if they get back first.

That's it.

Good, good.

The camera loves you, Tia.

You're a natural.

You think I'm good?

Good? Baby, you're great.

Just put yourself in my hands,

and I'll take you to the top.

Are you kidding?

- Varique,
- I'll do anything you say.

Perfect.

Now, let's do a few

on the couch.

While I change film

why don't you change

your clothes?

But, varique, I didn't

bring anything else to wear.

I did a layout with

Naomi Campbell last week.

- The clients
- left this behind.

I think it might be

your size.

Whoa-ho-ho, where's the parka

that goes over this bikini?

You're kidding, right?

Come on, varique.

I usually wear more

in the shower.

My dad would kill me.

Oh, well, I wouldn't

want your dad to get upset.

Why don't I call him

and explain the situation?

- No, no, please,
- don't, don't.

See, he kind

of doesn't know I'm here.

Look, varique, I don't...

Don't what?

Look, babe, I'm doing you

a real big favor here.

No professional models

would ever give me

this kind of trouble.

I'll tell you what...

If you want to go

go.

The door is open.

Okay.

I'm sorry.

I'm fine now.

Good girl.

- Tia:
- Varique? Hello?

Varique?

Tamera?

Varique?

Tia, where'd you get

that coat from?

Oh. The gap.

Is that supposed to be funny?

Look, varique,

I can see you're mad

- but I promise...
- I didn't put tamera up to this.

Who's tamera?

My sister.

You mean she didn't come

here pretending to be me?

Babe, there's nobody

here but you and me.

No, uh-uh, not going to happen.

If there's one thing

I learned from my daddy

it's how to say "no!"

Hi, Tia.

- No! I am not
- wearing this...

Tia?

Tamera?

Twins.

Boy, tamera,

are you in trouble.

We'll discuss this at home.

If we ever get there.

Oh! I can't believe it.

We didn't even get

to hildred's party.

- Why'd you have
- to argue with that policeman?

Why couldn't you just

take that ticket and shut up?

As I tried to tell

officer Dwayne Martini

badge #875,

I wasn't littering.

It wasn't my fault that the

sideburn glue didn't hold.

It didn't hold to your face,

but that old muttonchop

- held pretty good
- to his windshield.

I would've caught it

if the wind hadn't blown

these lapels up in my face.

I forgot how much

I hated the '70s.

- It wasn't no picnic
- for me either.

- You ever tried putting
- on a miniskirt

And sitting on a cold metal

bus seat in January?

- The worst part
- was coming home to the dorm

- And finding some hippie dippy
- freeloader eating

Your food, feet up

on the furniture.

Evening, peaches.

Evening, herb.

Double up on the

cracker barrel. It goes fast.

What are you doing here?

Waiting on your tardy twins.

I've already missed sneaking

into the 7:20 and 8:55 showing

of blood-sucking zombies.

- I love
- those little suckers.

- I got kicked out
- of the last one

For yelling at the screen...

"that ain't your mama.

"Your mama dead.

Run, fool."

You know, Ms. Landry, we

could still make the 9:15.

The girls aren't home?

Where are they?

Tamera went to see

some freak named varique.

- Tia went to get her
- before you two found out.

Oops.

Oh, ray.

- Our babies
- could be in danger.

Did they leave an address?

No, but I know

where you can get it.

It's on the computer.

So, what do you say we

get this party started right?

Party?

What party?

I don't see any balloons.

- You'd better let us
- out of here

- Before our parents
- come looking for us.

You just said your dad

doesn't know where you are.

Tamera!

Well, he doesn't.

Who are you anyway?

We know you're not

really varique Dalton.

- That's the beauty
- of these computer friendships.

I can be anybody I want.

Good. Could you be a policeman

and arrest yourself?

What are you scared of me for?

I'm a real nice guy...

Once you get to know me.

How about it?

How about this?!

Run, Tia!

Get the door! Quick!

Come on! Hurry up!

Would you two

quit your wiggling?

All I'm looking for

is a little love.

What's love got

to do with it?

Not only did you disobey me

- you put yourself
- and your sister in danger.

How could you be so stupid?

Let's cut to the chase.

Anything you want?

Just ask me.

Okay.

Well, dad, can I...?

No!

Well, look, dad

I know it was all my fault.

Not really, tamera.

I kind of got you

into this.

I trusted that slimeball.

Yes, you did, baby.

- Now, that slimeball
- won't do too much internetting

From a jail cell

but there are plenty more

out there just as slimy.

Any nut can have a computer.

I have a computer.

- Do you know how
- lucky you are

That you weren't hurt?

We're not saying you

should grow up afraid

but, well, you just

better grow up.

We will, mom.

Good, and until you learn

to be more responsible

here are

your new computers.

Man, I've sure

learned my lesson.

I'll never fall for

a scam like that again.

Who is it?

Hi. My name

is montel Jordan...

You know the singer of

"this is how we do it"?

My car broke down.

Can I use your phone?

- Oh, brother,
- do you believe this?

What do you think...

We were born yesterday?

Get lost, you creep.

Yeah, take a hike

before we sic the cops on you.

- Just how stupid do people
- think we really are?

- Where are the girls? Aren't they
- home?

No. Tamera went to go see

some freak name varique.

I just changed it around.

Not only did you disobey me

- but you put you
- and your sister...

Dad, I know

it was all my fault.

Not, really, tamera.

I mean, I kind of

got you into it...

I couldn't hold it.

I slobbered on myself.