Sister, Sister (1994–1999): Season 3, Episode 8 - Weird Science - full transcript
When Ray dates their science teacher, the girls think they cannot fail.
Okay, turn to your left.
Now turn to your right.
Mmm, my butt's getting big.
Hey!
Okay, now spin around.
Tia, you're not dressed.
What are you doing?
Our mirror broke.
Spin around.
That looks terrible on me!
I can't wear that!
♪ Talk about
a two-way twister ♪
♪ shakin' up the family tree
with sibling synchronicity ♪
- ♪ never knew how
- much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go! ♪
- ♪Never knew
- how much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go ♪
So I wanted to show
that true planetary orbits are
elliptical and not concentric.
Any questions?
I have a question.
Where can you find fabulous
fashions and accessories
at prices that aren't
in the stratosphere?
Mom!
Give up?
Fashions by Lisa
at the northland mall.
- I exposed these plants
- to different types
Of music and observed
the response.
See, this one
heard a dance mix.
Nice moves for a houseplant.
What about this one?
Uh...
This one listened to kathie Lee
gifford's Christmas cd.
- You're saying kathie Lee
- killed this plant?
Mmm, sort of.
The music gave me the creeps.
So, I left the room
and this plant never got water.
Hey, Roger, check it out.
There's now fashions
by Lisa on Mars.
Wow. There isn't even
a gap there.
Hey, where's
your project, Roger?
The principal said
it was inappropriate.
What was it?
- It was a sociological survey
- called "girls, girls, girls."
Well, then,
you deserve an incomplete.
The incomplete was nothing.
- Wait till my father
- sees the phone bill.
- So, I finally get
- to meet tamera's father.
Yes. I'm ray single,
uh, uh, Campbell. Campbell.
Look at my dad.
I always thought
science teachers were
slightly balding
- with socks down around
- their ankles
And a little, fuzzy moustache.
That was your teacher?
- Yeah, and I'll
- never forget her.
- So, he's talking
- to miss Hendricks.
Exactly! My dad
and my teacher talking?
No good can come out of this.
- Ooh, I wish I could hear
- what they're saying.
Consider it done.
We can use this cool scientific
thingy that my dad built for
me.
- I don't want to hear it!
- I know what she's telling him.
- She's telling him,
- I'm a terrible student
I don't apply myself,
I'm disruptive in class
I'm too social, I talk too much
- and I tend to go on
- and on and...
Tamera, shut up!
Well, is it me, or am I sensing
some chemistry in the room?
You're the teacher.
You should know.
You've got to listen to this.
- They're not talking
- about you at all.
They're happy.
Maybe we should be
reconvene someplace less
scientific.
Ooh, that would be great.
Why don't you call me?
Why bother calling?
- Are you free
- this Saturday night?
Denise, next time, tell
your father to do a better job.
Teachers and parents dating?
Isn't that illegal?
Hey, if they start dating
this could be the stuff
a kid like me dreams of.
What do you mean?
Do I have to draw a picture
of the big picture, Denise?
If my teacher is dating my dad
there is no way she can
give me a bad grade
without him
taking it personally.
That is a
beautiful big picture.
Oh, look! They're here
and they're getting along
just great.
They're talking... big deal!
- Tamera, I can't believe
- you actually think
- That this stupid plan
- is going to work.
Okay, one little kiss.
It's not like that means...
Oh, man. You're going
to get an "a."
"A" plus!
- You know, it's not too late
- for you to get in on this.
Oh, I don't know.
- I'm not good
- at this sort of thing.
Quick! They're coming!
I got to look natural.
I thought you said natural.
Oh, right. What was I thinking?
- Hey, it's dark in here.
- Hi, girls.
Hi.
Let me introduce you...
- Oh, what am I doing? Of course,
- you know miss Hendricks.
- -Hi, girls.
- -Hello.
Dad, don't you think
- miss Hendricks is looking
- lovely tonight?
Yes, and I did not know
you had such high cheekbones.
Thank you.
You know, you two make such
a cute couple.
Welcome to the dark side.
- Well, we're just going
- to go upstairs and study.
Good night, dad!
Good night.
Not very good at this?
Why, kid, you're a natural.
- It must be odd for Tia
- and tamera to see a parent
Dating their science teacher.
- Not as odd as if they were
- to see me date
- Their math teacher,
- Mr. Strepick.
- Have a seat, I'll get us
- something to drink.
Thank you.
Here you go, dad.
- Just thought you
- and miss Hendricks
Might enjoy a fine chardonnay.
What are you up to?
- I'm just trying
- to be a good hostess.
Shouldn't you
be working on your
science report?
Oh. I'm going
to get a good grade.
Trust me.
Hey, lady!
- Can you make me a balloon
- in the shape of a giraffe?
For the 14th time, balloon Bob
isn't here anymore
- and I don't make balloons
- shaped like giraffes.
Okay, a zebra.
- I don't make
- any balloon animals.
Couldn't you try?
If you don't leave me alone
- I can twist you
- into any shape you like.
Hi. I'm Angie.
Hi. I'm Lisa. I own this cart.
Nice cart.
I own this store.
Oh, well, nice to meet you.
You know, I'll tell you
- the shop owners I've met
- are not that friendly.
Let me give you a little hint
in winning them over.
Don't scare away customers.
I'm sorry about that.
- They were bugging me
- about some balloon Bob guy.
Where did he go, anyway?
He's dead.
Oh.
Oh, so he made his last
balloon payment?
I don't think that's funny.
He was one of the finest men
to ever blow up a poodle
and besides, he knew the rules.
The rules?
What do you mean?
The mall bylaws
say you cart people
can't be within
ten feet of another
fine apparel store.
What fine apparel store?
Hello?!
Mostly Michigan.
Take a look-see
at those babies...
T-shirts with
wolverines, big m's
not like those
cheap silk scarves.
Why don't you try one on?
Dave!
- Sorry I couldn't respond
- to your 12-18 sooner, Angie.
- I was at Hudson
- getting an old lady
- To confess
- she stole some lipstick.
Good for you.
Not exactly.
She didn't really do it.
I may be in some trouble.
Excuse me?
- My wife's interested
- in a couple
Of those upper peninsula
oven mitts?
Got to go... hot one!
- Why don't these people
- lighten up?
Well, this is the old end
of the mall.
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Yeah, these people
are pretty much set
in their ways.
Okay, you are regulation.
- -Ray?
- -Hmm?
Does that look like a giraffe?
Yeah, after a run-in
with a land cruiser.
Oh, never mind.
So, uh, you getting good grades
with that science teacher?
Yeah, and I'm not the only one.
I think tamera thinks
she can coast
as long as I'm dating Paula.
Why do you always
assume the worst?
- Why don't you try
- trusting tamera?
- Maybe she can live up
- to that trust.
- Yeah, you're right,
- I always do that.
- I have to change my way
- of thinking about tamera.
It's only fair.
Ah, tamera.
- Want me to go over
- your science report?
Nah, it's all right.
Miss Hendricks is so cool.
She said I can turn it in late.
- You know, dad,
- she's quite a catch.
You should hold onto the lady.
Oh, and here's a thought.
Take a look at these brochures.
Picture you and Paula sailing
the Caribbean on the love boat.
- I hear it's beautiful
- around midterms.
I mean, December.
Should I trust her?
- Tamera, I hate to sink
- your love boat
But I've decided to
break up with Paula.
Here.
Well, wait, I thought you two
liked each other.
Uh, she's not my type.
- This woman likes you.
- That's the type you want.
I'm sorry. It's over.
Oh, man, this is terrible.
I wanted you two to be happy.
God!
- You're going to break up with
- Paula because of tamera?
No way. You've seen Paula.
I'm a good father,
but I'm not nuts.
- Tia, tamera,
- where are your reports?
Um, I can explain. You see...
- Oh, that's okay, Tia,
- I understand.
- You just bring it in when
- you're finished, hmm?
I forgot to mention this, Tia.
- I think there's
- an unexpected bump in the plan.
- I'm sure we can find
- an easy way out.
What's the bump?
- I think my dad is going to
- break up with miss Hendricks.
When? I haven't even done
my report yet.
- I'm going to have to do it
- before he does.
Shh! Take it easy.
I hate the dark side.
Tia, don't worry.
My dad said she's not his type,
and I think I know what it is
- so after class, I'll give
- miss Hendricks a few pointers
On how she can improve herself
and keep my dad interested.
Remember, tomorrow's test
is 30% of your grade,
so be ready.
Um, miss Hendricks?
- Can I talk to you
- about something personal?
Oh, sure. What's your problem?
Well, I just keep hearing
that men like women
who dress really sexy.
Oh, that's not
necessarily true.
Well, maybe you're right.
It's just something
- that I keep hearing around
- the house lately.
I mean, since around the time
you started dating my dad.
- Did ray say something
- about my clothes?
- Oh, no, I'm sure he wasn't
- referring to you.
Well, he's not seeing
someone else, is he?
No... not yet.
Hey, have you ever thought
- about doing something
- to your hair?
Maybe more of a sassy cut?
I don't think this is really
appropriate for us
to be discussing here.
- He said something
- about my hair?
Well, you see
- he was watching TV,
- and he saw Vanessa Williams
And he said, "gee, it's too bad
Paula doesn't look like that."
Oh, really?
- So, is there anything else
- about me that he doesn't like?
Who said he didn't like you?
He's crazy about you.
Maybe if you didn't monopolize
the conversation so much
on your dates, he'd tell you.
Excuse me.
I'm going to have lunch now.
- Oh, stay away
- from the fish sticks.
You look great now
- but you'll be wearing
- them tomorrow.
Thanks for the tip, tamera.
You're welcome.
Tell your dad that I want
to have a talk with him.
Oh, good, because men
like really good listeners.
Oh, he'll be doing
all the listening
in this conversation
- because he won't have to listen
- to me ever again.
Oh, wait!
Oh, hi, ray. Sit down.
Grab a Michigan mug
and a Wolverine napkin
and pour yourself
some grand rapid chablis.
I'm sensing a theme here.
- Yeah, I'm trying
- to make friends with the woman
- Who owns
- the mostly Michigan store
So I made a few purchases.
She must love you.
No. She still hates my guts.
Have you seen Tia and tamera?
- I bought them slippers
- from the slipperee.
- The woman there
- hates my guts too.
You shouldn't disturb them.
- They're knee deep
- in their science reports.
Tia and tamera?
Yes, tamera is reading
a science book
and she's holding it
right side up.
- You saw her face
- when I told her
I was breaking up with Paula.
- Boy, she bought it
- hook, line and sinker.
Dad, that is the lowest,
sneakiest
most underhanded thing
I have ever heard.
I'm sorry, honey
- but I didn't mean
- to lie to you.
- But I had to teach
- you a lesson.
- Wait a minute.
- Let me get this straight.
You never planned to break up
with miss Hendricks?
No. We're getting along great.
Uh... have you talked
to her today?
- No, but we're
- going out tonight.
Hello.
Oh, just a minute.
Ooh.
Ray, it's Paula.
Either she's very upset
- or she backed
- into a bunsen burner.
- Well, I certainly
- wouldn't want to eavesdrop
On a personal phone call.
- I'll just be getting back
- to my report.
- -Bye, dad!
- -Bye.
Hi, Paula.
- We're still on
- for the theater tonight?
You're going alone?
W-W-Where should I go?
What?!
Uh, but, but...
Hello? Hello?
That's the weirdest thing.
Paula just broke up with me.
Hmm.
Have a Michigan hankie.
This isn't my chosen field.
- I've always wanted to follow
- in my father's footsteps.
What did he do?
Neurosurgeon.
Ever since I flunked
out of junior college
it's kind of been put on hold.
That gun isn't loaded, is it?
You know, I... I don't know.
I'm kind of afraid to check.
- Well, thanks for having
- coffee with me, Dave.
Better go open up my cart.
Yeah. I better get
back to work too.
You know, it's sad
that I'm necessary.
You know, that is true, Dave.
But if I weren't here
- people would come into this -
mall and just walk off with - Anything.
It's gone! My cart is gone!
That is so weird.
- We were just talking - about
people walking - Off with things.
Dave, go find my cart!
Right.
Well, I scoured
the entire precinct...
Well, you know, the mall...
- But, I haven't been able to
- locate your retail vehicle.
Maybe some kids took it
for a joy-push.
Gone. It's long gone.
- Perps probably took it
- to a chop shop
- And it's being stripped
- of its stuff.
There's a lot of money
in that cart.
Or I'll say they can use
the wheels as planters
chop up the rest into firewood.
I meant my clothes, Dave.
- They probably tossed that
- stuff.
Ohh!
- This has been a disaster
- since I moved in here.
I should have known.
It was a bad decision
from the beginning.
- I should have invested in -
something that didn't roll - Away.
Something stationary
like a stationery store.
Don't give up yet.
- I'm going to go
- back to that guy
- Who owns the
- religious bookstore.
When I interrogated him
his answers were
a little too pat.
- I'm going to get
- the entire department on this
Unless Clare's gone home.
Well, mall, you finally won.
You hear that, mall?!
You won!
Hey, Lisa.
What is it, mall?
No. It's me.
Oh, the slipperee woman.
Yeah, what you want?
I think I found your cart.
Really?! Where?
- Out in parking
- structure "d", level two.
Oh.
Is that the yellow one?
No. The orange one.
Learn your map.
Rookies.
Tia, I've got to talk
to miss Hendricks
after class.
What for?
- We already handed
- in our reports.
Leave well enough alone.
Tia, it's not that.
I just feel bad
about what I did.
- I want to get miss Hendricks
- and my dad back together.
Oh great! How will you
do it this time?
Tell her she needs a face-lift?
- No. I'm going to give her
- this card
- With a cute little message
- and pretend it's from my dad.
That'll never work.
Ohh! It's Garfield
and he's crying.
"I cat live without you.
Ray Campbell."
Ray Campbell?
- That's all you're going
- to write?
- Hey, all I know how to forge
- is his name
- And "please excuse tamera
- from school today."
Hey, I could add that.
No!
Hi, miss Hendricks.
Do I know you?
Yeah.
You flunked me three years ago.
I'm delivering flowers now.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Ooh! Ahh!
Class shh.
Pretty flowers.
- Where'd you get
- the money for those?
I'll pay you back.
Good-bye, kids.
Ah, remember chapter 12
tomorrow.
Did my dad send you
those flowers?
Yes.
Oh, he also wanted me
to give you this.
Oh.
Tamera, I hope you don't
take this the wrong way
- but, I think you might
- have misunderstood
- The things your father
- said about me.
Could be. I'm a kid.
What do I know?
- Well, it's obvious you
- don't know anything
About the planets.
Here's your incomplete.
Why don't you redo it, and I'll
- pick it up tomorrow night
- when I go out with your dad.
Ohh.
Oh, you found it!
Oh, thanks, guys.
Thanks for everything.
I take back everything I said.
So how'd you find it?
It wasn't hard.
We took it.
I hate you guys!
- I take back everything
- I just took back.
New invention sense of humor.
Pick one up.
Look, it's like an initiation.
- We do it to all
- the new cart people.
It's our way of saying
- "welcome to the old end
- of the mall."
I don't think it's funny.
Look, I put my life savings
into this!
- Now, I tried to be nice
- to all you people
And you snubbed me.
- On top of that,
- you steal my cart
Because you think it's funny?
That's it. I'm quitting.
We're sorry.
- Oh, you save it
- for the next poor chump
With a cart and a dream!
We really hurt that lady.
I feel bad.
So do I.
-Got you!
You're not really mad.
Oh, yeah, I'm still mad
but this is just
my little initiation.
Hey, she's good.
She's going to fit in.
Well, it took some doing
but I finally found it.
The thieves disguised it
as a falafel cart.
Hey, whose cart is this?
- Hi mom, we were down
- at the good end of the mall
- And thought we'd
- hike down and see you.
So, how's it going?
Not bad.
I'm starting to fit in here.
People are forgetting
that balloon Bob died.
What?!
Balloon Bob died?
I love balloon Bob.
Girls, girls, come on now.
No problem. No problem.
Hey, so, what'll it be?
Zebra? Giraffe? What you want?
Anything you want!
Now turn to your right.
Mmm, my butt's getting big.
Hey!
Okay, now spin around.
Tia, you're not dressed.
What are you doing?
Our mirror broke.
Spin around.
That looks terrible on me!
I can't wear that!
♪ Talk about
a two-way twister ♪
♪ shakin' up the family tree
with sibling synchronicity ♪
- ♪ never knew how
- much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go! ♪
- ♪Never knew
- how much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go ♪
So I wanted to show
that true planetary orbits are
elliptical and not concentric.
Any questions?
I have a question.
Where can you find fabulous
fashions and accessories
at prices that aren't
in the stratosphere?
Mom!
Give up?
Fashions by Lisa
at the northland mall.
- I exposed these plants
- to different types
Of music and observed
the response.
See, this one
heard a dance mix.
Nice moves for a houseplant.
What about this one?
Uh...
This one listened to kathie Lee
gifford's Christmas cd.
- You're saying kathie Lee
- killed this plant?
Mmm, sort of.
The music gave me the creeps.
So, I left the room
and this plant never got water.
Hey, Roger, check it out.
There's now fashions
by Lisa on Mars.
Wow. There isn't even
a gap there.
Hey, where's
your project, Roger?
The principal said
it was inappropriate.
What was it?
- It was a sociological survey
- called "girls, girls, girls."
Well, then,
you deserve an incomplete.
The incomplete was nothing.
- Wait till my father
- sees the phone bill.
- So, I finally get
- to meet tamera's father.
Yes. I'm ray single,
uh, uh, Campbell. Campbell.
Look at my dad.
I always thought
science teachers were
slightly balding
- with socks down around
- their ankles
And a little, fuzzy moustache.
That was your teacher?
- Yeah, and I'll
- never forget her.
- So, he's talking
- to miss Hendricks.
Exactly! My dad
and my teacher talking?
No good can come out of this.
- Ooh, I wish I could hear
- what they're saying.
Consider it done.
We can use this cool scientific
thingy that my dad built for
me.
- I don't want to hear it!
- I know what she's telling him.
- She's telling him,
- I'm a terrible student
I don't apply myself,
I'm disruptive in class
I'm too social, I talk too much
- and I tend to go on
- and on and...
Tamera, shut up!
Well, is it me, or am I sensing
some chemistry in the room?
You're the teacher.
You should know.
You've got to listen to this.
- They're not talking
- about you at all.
They're happy.
Maybe we should be
reconvene someplace less
scientific.
Ooh, that would be great.
Why don't you call me?
Why bother calling?
- Are you free
- this Saturday night?
Denise, next time, tell
your father to do a better job.
Teachers and parents dating?
Isn't that illegal?
Hey, if they start dating
this could be the stuff
a kid like me dreams of.
What do you mean?
Do I have to draw a picture
of the big picture, Denise?
If my teacher is dating my dad
there is no way she can
give me a bad grade
without him
taking it personally.
That is a
beautiful big picture.
Oh, look! They're here
and they're getting along
just great.
They're talking... big deal!
- Tamera, I can't believe
- you actually think
- That this stupid plan
- is going to work.
Okay, one little kiss.
It's not like that means...
Oh, man. You're going
to get an "a."
"A" plus!
- You know, it's not too late
- for you to get in on this.
Oh, I don't know.
- I'm not good
- at this sort of thing.
Quick! They're coming!
I got to look natural.
I thought you said natural.
Oh, right. What was I thinking?
- Hey, it's dark in here.
- Hi, girls.
Hi.
Let me introduce you...
- Oh, what am I doing? Of course,
- you know miss Hendricks.
- -Hi, girls.
- -Hello.
Dad, don't you think
- miss Hendricks is looking
- lovely tonight?
Yes, and I did not know
you had such high cheekbones.
Thank you.
You know, you two make such
a cute couple.
Welcome to the dark side.
- Well, we're just going
- to go upstairs and study.
Good night, dad!
Good night.
Not very good at this?
Why, kid, you're a natural.
- It must be odd for Tia
- and tamera to see a parent
Dating their science teacher.
- Not as odd as if they were
- to see me date
- Their math teacher,
- Mr. Strepick.
- Have a seat, I'll get us
- something to drink.
Thank you.
Here you go, dad.
- Just thought you
- and miss Hendricks
Might enjoy a fine chardonnay.
What are you up to?
- I'm just trying
- to be a good hostess.
Shouldn't you
be working on your
science report?
Oh. I'm going
to get a good grade.
Trust me.
Hey, lady!
- Can you make me a balloon
- in the shape of a giraffe?
For the 14th time, balloon Bob
isn't here anymore
- and I don't make balloons
- shaped like giraffes.
Okay, a zebra.
- I don't make
- any balloon animals.
Couldn't you try?
If you don't leave me alone
- I can twist you
- into any shape you like.
Hi. I'm Angie.
Hi. I'm Lisa. I own this cart.
Nice cart.
I own this store.
Oh, well, nice to meet you.
You know, I'll tell you
- the shop owners I've met
- are not that friendly.
Let me give you a little hint
in winning them over.
Don't scare away customers.
I'm sorry about that.
- They were bugging me
- about some balloon Bob guy.
Where did he go, anyway?
He's dead.
Oh.
Oh, so he made his last
balloon payment?
I don't think that's funny.
He was one of the finest men
to ever blow up a poodle
and besides, he knew the rules.
The rules?
What do you mean?
The mall bylaws
say you cart people
can't be within
ten feet of another
fine apparel store.
What fine apparel store?
Hello?!
Mostly Michigan.
Take a look-see
at those babies...
T-shirts with
wolverines, big m's
not like those
cheap silk scarves.
Why don't you try one on?
Dave!
- Sorry I couldn't respond
- to your 12-18 sooner, Angie.
- I was at Hudson
- getting an old lady
- To confess
- she stole some lipstick.
Good for you.
Not exactly.
She didn't really do it.
I may be in some trouble.
Excuse me?
- My wife's interested
- in a couple
Of those upper peninsula
oven mitts?
Got to go... hot one!
- Why don't these people
- lighten up?
Well, this is the old end
of the mall.
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Yeah, these people
are pretty much set
in their ways.
Okay, you are regulation.
- -Ray?
- -Hmm?
Does that look like a giraffe?
Yeah, after a run-in
with a land cruiser.
Oh, never mind.
So, uh, you getting good grades
with that science teacher?
Yeah, and I'm not the only one.
I think tamera thinks
she can coast
as long as I'm dating Paula.
Why do you always
assume the worst?
- Why don't you try
- trusting tamera?
- Maybe she can live up
- to that trust.
- Yeah, you're right,
- I always do that.
- I have to change my way
- of thinking about tamera.
It's only fair.
Ah, tamera.
- Want me to go over
- your science report?
Nah, it's all right.
Miss Hendricks is so cool.
She said I can turn it in late.
- You know, dad,
- she's quite a catch.
You should hold onto the lady.
Oh, and here's a thought.
Take a look at these brochures.
Picture you and Paula sailing
the Caribbean on the love boat.
- I hear it's beautiful
- around midterms.
I mean, December.
Should I trust her?
- Tamera, I hate to sink
- your love boat
But I've decided to
break up with Paula.
Here.
Well, wait, I thought you two
liked each other.
Uh, she's not my type.
- This woman likes you.
- That's the type you want.
I'm sorry. It's over.
Oh, man, this is terrible.
I wanted you two to be happy.
God!
- You're going to break up with
- Paula because of tamera?
No way. You've seen Paula.
I'm a good father,
but I'm not nuts.
- Tia, tamera,
- where are your reports?
Um, I can explain. You see...
- Oh, that's okay, Tia,
- I understand.
- You just bring it in when
- you're finished, hmm?
I forgot to mention this, Tia.
- I think there's
- an unexpected bump in the plan.
- I'm sure we can find
- an easy way out.
What's the bump?
- I think my dad is going to
- break up with miss Hendricks.
When? I haven't even done
my report yet.
- I'm going to have to do it
- before he does.
Shh! Take it easy.
I hate the dark side.
Tia, don't worry.
My dad said she's not his type,
and I think I know what it is
- so after class, I'll give
- miss Hendricks a few pointers
On how she can improve herself
and keep my dad interested.
Remember, tomorrow's test
is 30% of your grade,
so be ready.
Um, miss Hendricks?
- Can I talk to you
- about something personal?
Oh, sure. What's your problem?
Well, I just keep hearing
that men like women
who dress really sexy.
Oh, that's not
necessarily true.
Well, maybe you're right.
It's just something
- that I keep hearing around
- the house lately.
I mean, since around the time
you started dating my dad.
- Did ray say something
- about my clothes?
- Oh, no, I'm sure he wasn't
- referring to you.
Well, he's not seeing
someone else, is he?
No... not yet.
Hey, have you ever thought
- about doing something
- to your hair?
Maybe more of a sassy cut?
I don't think this is really
appropriate for us
to be discussing here.
- He said something
- about my hair?
Well, you see
- he was watching TV,
- and he saw Vanessa Williams
And he said, "gee, it's too bad
Paula doesn't look like that."
Oh, really?
- So, is there anything else
- about me that he doesn't like?
Who said he didn't like you?
He's crazy about you.
Maybe if you didn't monopolize
the conversation so much
on your dates, he'd tell you.
Excuse me.
I'm going to have lunch now.
- Oh, stay away
- from the fish sticks.
You look great now
- but you'll be wearing
- them tomorrow.
Thanks for the tip, tamera.
You're welcome.
Tell your dad that I want
to have a talk with him.
Oh, good, because men
like really good listeners.
Oh, he'll be doing
all the listening
in this conversation
- because he won't have to listen
- to me ever again.
Oh, wait!
Oh, hi, ray. Sit down.
Grab a Michigan mug
and a Wolverine napkin
and pour yourself
some grand rapid chablis.
I'm sensing a theme here.
- Yeah, I'm trying
- to make friends with the woman
- Who owns
- the mostly Michigan store
So I made a few purchases.
She must love you.
No. She still hates my guts.
Have you seen Tia and tamera?
- I bought them slippers
- from the slipperee.
- The woman there
- hates my guts too.
You shouldn't disturb them.
- They're knee deep
- in their science reports.
Tia and tamera?
Yes, tamera is reading
a science book
and she's holding it
right side up.
- You saw her face
- when I told her
I was breaking up with Paula.
- Boy, she bought it
- hook, line and sinker.
Dad, that is the lowest,
sneakiest
most underhanded thing
I have ever heard.
I'm sorry, honey
- but I didn't mean
- to lie to you.
- But I had to teach
- you a lesson.
- Wait a minute.
- Let me get this straight.
You never planned to break up
with miss Hendricks?
No. We're getting along great.
Uh... have you talked
to her today?
- No, but we're
- going out tonight.
Hello.
Oh, just a minute.
Ooh.
Ray, it's Paula.
Either she's very upset
- or she backed
- into a bunsen burner.
- Well, I certainly
- wouldn't want to eavesdrop
On a personal phone call.
- I'll just be getting back
- to my report.
- -Bye, dad!
- -Bye.
Hi, Paula.
- We're still on
- for the theater tonight?
You're going alone?
W-W-Where should I go?
What?!
Uh, but, but...
Hello? Hello?
That's the weirdest thing.
Paula just broke up with me.
Hmm.
Have a Michigan hankie.
This isn't my chosen field.
- I've always wanted to follow
- in my father's footsteps.
What did he do?
Neurosurgeon.
Ever since I flunked
out of junior college
it's kind of been put on hold.
That gun isn't loaded, is it?
You know, I... I don't know.
I'm kind of afraid to check.
- Well, thanks for having
- coffee with me, Dave.
Better go open up my cart.
Yeah. I better get
back to work too.
You know, it's sad
that I'm necessary.
You know, that is true, Dave.
But if I weren't here
- people would come into this -
mall and just walk off with - Anything.
It's gone! My cart is gone!
That is so weird.
- We were just talking - about
people walking - Off with things.
Dave, go find my cart!
Right.
Well, I scoured
the entire precinct...
Well, you know, the mall...
- But, I haven't been able to
- locate your retail vehicle.
Maybe some kids took it
for a joy-push.
Gone. It's long gone.
- Perps probably took it
- to a chop shop
- And it's being stripped
- of its stuff.
There's a lot of money
in that cart.
Or I'll say they can use
the wheels as planters
chop up the rest into firewood.
I meant my clothes, Dave.
- They probably tossed that
- stuff.
Ohh!
- This has been a disaster
- since I moved in here.
I should have known.
It was a bad decision
from the beginning.
- I should have invested in -
something that didn't roll - Away.
Something stationary
like a stationery store.
Don't give up yet.
- I'm going to go
- back to that guy
- Who owns the
- religious bookstore.
When I interrogated him
his answers were
a little too pat.
- I'm going to get
- the entire department on this
Unless Clare's gone home.
Well, mall, you finally won.
You hear that, mall?!
You won!
Hey, Lisa.
What is it, mall?
No. It's me.
Oh, the slipperee woman.
Yeah, what you want?
I think I found your cart.
Really?! Where?
- Out in parking
- structure "d", level two.
Oh.
Is that the yellow one?
No. The orange one.
Learn your map.
Rookies.
Tia, I've got to talk
to miss Hendricks
after class.
What for?
- We already handed
- in our reports.
Leave well enough alone.
Tia, it's not that.
I just feel bad
about what I did.
- I want to get miss Hendricks
- and my dad back together.
Oh great! How will you
do it this time?
Tell her she needs a face-lift?
- No. I'm going to give her
- this card
- With a cute little message
- and pretend it's from my dad.
That'll never work.
Ohh! It's Garfield
and he's crying.
"I cat live without you.
Ray Campbell."
Ray Campbell?
- That's all you're going
- to write?
- Hey, all I know how to forge
- is his name
- And "please excuse tamera
- from school today."
Hey, I could add that.
No!
Hi, miss Hendricks.
Do I know you?
Yeah.
You flunked me three years ago.
I'm delivering flowers now.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Ooh! Ahh!
Class shh.
Pretty flowers.
- Where'd you get
- the money for those?
I'll pay you back.
Good-bye, kids.
Ah, remember chapter 12
tomorrow.
Did my dad send you
those flowers?
Yes.
Oh, he also wanted me
to give you this.
Oh.
Tamera, I hope you don't
take this the wrong way
- but, I think you might
- have misunderstood
- The things your father
- said about me.
Could be. I'm a kid.
What do I know?
- Well, it's obvious you
- don't know anything
About the planets.
Here's your incomplete.
Why don't you redo it, and I'll
- pick it up tomorrow night
- when I go out with your dad.
Ohh.
Oh, you found it!
Oh, thanks, guys.
Thanks for everything.
I take back everything I said.
So how'd you find it?
It wasn't hard.
We took it.
I hate you guys!
- I take back everything
- I just took back.
New invention sense of humor.
Pick one up.
Look, it's like an initiation.
- We do it to all
- the new cart people.
It's our way of saying
- "welcome to the old end
- of the mall."
I don't think it's funny.
Look, I put my life savings
into this!
- Now, I tried to be nice
- to all you people
And you snubbed me.
- On top of that,
- you steal my cart
Because you think it's funny?
That's it. I'm quitting.
We're sorry.
- Oh, you save it
- for the next poor chump
With a cart and a dream!
We really hurt that lady.
I feel bad.
So do I.
-Got you!
You're not really mad.
Oh, yeah, I'm still mad
but this is just
my little initiation.
Hey, she's good.
She's going to fit in.
Well, it took some doing
but I finally found it.
The thieves disguised it
as a falafel cart.
Hey, whose cart is this?
- Hi mom, we were down
- at the good end of the mall
- And thought we'd
- hike down and see you.
So, how's it going?
Not bad.
I'm starting to fit in here.
People are forgetting
that balloon Bob died.
What?!
Balloon Bob died?
I love balloon Bob.
Girls, girls, come on now.
No problem. No problem.
Hey, so, what'll it be?
Zebra? Giraffe? What you want?
Anything you want!