Sister, Sister (1994–1999): Season 3, Episode 5 - Grandpa Campbell - full transcript
Ray's ne'er-do-well dad turns the household upside-down.
We have this big economics
project going at school
- where we learn
- how to run a business.
- We get fake some money,
- stock or inventory
- And sell the merchandise
- to the other kids.
- The student with the most money
- at the end of project.
Gets their name
on a cool trophy.
Oh, wow!
Ignore her.
My friend marcia and I
are selling jewelry.
- -Hi, marcia.
- -Hi, Tia. Hi, tamera.
So what's the first
order of business
for the t&M
jewelry company?
The first order of business
is changing the name
to the m&T jewelry company.
Well, why don't
we negotiate this
just like real business people?
-Good idea.
-Okay. Call it.
Heads.
Bummer.
♪ Talk about
a two-way twister ♪
♪ shakin' up the family tree
with sibling synchronicity ♪
♪ never knew how
much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go! ♪
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- ♪ Never knew
- how much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go ♪
- Tamara, we've known about this
- project for weeks.
When are you getting to work?
- Hey, it's just
- a rinky-dink school project
And for your information,
I am working.
Roger, will you hurry up
with our project!
- We're going to be late
- for school!
Tamera, when
I'm working for you
I'm always on golden time.
Okay, how's this for a slogan?
"More bangles for your buck."
Go, girl!
Ah, tamera, how's that
punch company going?
Dad, this project is just
for the geeks and gorkuses
who are totally into it.
- Tamera, you'll learn - a lot about having
- Your own business.
It could come in handy.
Dad, I'm not a seller.
I'm a shopper.
You know business it's simple.
- You just have to make - a great product,
- Know your Mark
And above all,
work very very hard.
See? There's always a catch.
- You're a successful
- businessman.
- Maybe you can give
- us some advice.
Let's not trouble daddy.
Come on.
It won't be any trouble at all.
That's real nice...
- You getting involved
- with tamera's schoolwork.
- It is a communication
- between a parent and child
- Is a key to making this place
- a better planet.
Hello?
Yeah...
What do you want?
What? Now?
Okay.
- -Who was that?
- -My father.
- He's on his way here now
- from the airport.
He wants something.
I know it. What is it?
- Maybe he's just dropping by
- to say hello.
My father isn't
a drop-by-to-say-hello
kind of a guy.
He shows up every five years,
always for the same reason...
He either wants money or a safe
haven till things blow over.
He sounds interesting.
You sure he's your father?
Problem is tamera idolizes him.
- She doesn't know
- what he's really like.
Hmm.
Ray, look.
- You getting very,
- very agitated.
- Look at your foot.
- It's shaking just like a dog - When you scratch his belly.
It's my father.
Here. Hide that.
Sonny!
- How you... how you doing,
- Jimmy?
Well?
-Oh, yeah.
-Ahh!
Can this be little tamera?
How about a great big hug?
No, no, Mr. Campbell, I'm Lisa.
I'm terribly sorry, Lisa.
How about a great big hug?
- Lisa is Tia's mother.
- I wrote you about her.
- I guess you didn't
- get the letter.
- I'm having trouble
- getting my mail.
I been in this
witness protection program
for a few months.
Ray told me you lived
on the edge, Mr. Campbell.
Oh please. My friends
call me soupy.
Ohh, I get it...
Because your name is Campbell.
No. Because I'm always
in hot water.
- Oh, ray, your little
- daddy's so adorable.
Yeah.
- Well, how about
- some coffee, soupy?
I'd prefer if you'd brew this.
It's kowloon poy San tea
- from the premiere
- of Singapore's private stock.
It's part
of my latest venture...
A string of tearooms.
- I figure that coffeehouse
- craze has peaked.
Isn't tearooms
a great idea, ray?
No.
So...
- Looks like you're
- doing pretty good
In your limousine
business, son, hmm?
Moving on up.
All right, come on, Jimmy.
- How much you want - me to invest in
- This tearoom scam?
Oh, sorry, but that scam...
Deal has been fully funded.
Okay, here you go.
Oh, isn't that cute?
Like father, like son.
Oh, the fact is,
I do have a bit of bad news.
Aha! I knew you'd get
- to the real reason
- you showed up.
- Your mother and I
- are getting divorced.
Oh. Oh, I'm so sorry, soupy.
Wait. He walked out
on my mother 17 years ago.
All right.
So I'm not totally blameless
but it still hurts.
Yeah, right.
- It made me realize that I was
- taking my family for granted.
- I know I was never around
- when you were growing up
And I know that damage is done.
But I would like to spend
some time with
my granddaughter.
- Yeah, sure,
- with proper supervision.
Maybe you two need to be alone.
Oh, I know you
must really be hurt.
- I know what happens to men
- when I dump them.
I'm devastated.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Mm-mm-mm.
Maybe this was the jolt
you needed, Jimmy.
As they say in Singapore...
Mm-hmm.
Which means?
"That woman be fine."
- Oh, I'm sorry, son.
- Where were we?
You were feeling devastated?
Yeah, right.
Don't worry, marcia.
We'll sell a bracelet tomorrow.
Oh, my gosh, Tia.
I've been wearing
one of our bracelets
all day and look.
It turned my wrist green.
Ew!
Well, just wear a lot
of yellows and browns.
- Cool. Hey, I'll see you
- tomorrow.
- -Okay. Bye.
- -Bye.
-There she is!
-What?!
My little tan buttercup!
Help! Ee-ya!
Grandpa!
No, no, I give up!
- Grandpa,
- it's me tamera.
Oops. I am so rude.
Grandpa, this is
my twin sister, Tia.
Yeah, we've met.
I am sorry I kicked you,
but I didn't have
my pepper spray.
- Please to meet you sir
- my name's Roger.
Hi, Roger.
- Tamara is always
- talking about you.
- Didn't you use to run track
- at north western?
No, I was run
out of north western.
Oh! This must be
that school project
- your father
- was telling me about.
Yeah. Pretending to run a
business, talk about lame.
Lame? There's nothing more fun
than chewing up the competition
- and spitting them out
- like bad meat.
How will I do that with
something as weeny as punch?
Oh-ho!
Are you kidding me?
That's a cinch.
Step into my office.
The first thing you got to do
is cut your
production cost, okay?
Ah, here we go.
Mm. Okay.
- Now take this,
- pour half here like this.
Aha! Okay.
We add a little h2o.
Shake, shake, shake.
Voila! taste that.
It tastes about the same.
Of course.
- You have just doubled
- your profits.
Hey, here's another great idea.
You create a demand.
Give away salty pretzels
with your punch.
- But Alfie cisneros already had
- the pretzel booth.
Hey!
We could merge with Alfie,
eventually buy him out
- and then slowly but surely
- ruin the other kids.
Now you got it.
Mr.campbell
do you have any tips
to boost the bracelet business?
- I heard they turn
- your wrist green.
Well, we just have
to turn a negative
into a positive.
Ah! Advertise them
as mood bracelets.
Yeah!
You could tell people
that green is serene.
Exactly. You're a natural.
- Well, that doesn't seem
- to be honest.
You sure you two are related?
Mm-hmm.
Uh-uh. Lisa, you are an artist
and the frying pan
is your canvas.
I don't mean to sound fresh
- but we should take you public
- and franchise you.
- Oh, soupy, I never been called
- a franchise before.
I've only been privately held.
Oh, boy.
- My wife used to
- fix me breakfast.
Now my life is just
one big, fat regret.
- Want another stack of waffles?
- That always makes - Me feel better.
No, no. I'm fine.
- How about I take you
- out to dinner tonight?
If you don't mind
the company of a bum.
- Oh come on soupy.
- You are not a bum.
- I'd be honored to go to dinner
- with you. My treat.
No! Soupy Campbell has never
let a woman pick up his check.
I insist we split it.
- That's the least I could do
- for imposing.
Oh no soupy,
you are not imposing.
I better clean up your room
- check your laundry
- and take back your videos.
Man, these pretzels are salty.
I need a cup of punch.
I'm afraid the prices
have gone up. It's now three.
It was one a few minutes ago.
D-ohh! You're gouging me, man.
We ought to try
some of these creative
marketing methods
- or else put a fork in us...
- We're done.
- Yeah, but how do
- we water down jewelry?
We don't have any choice.
Mood bracelets!
Green is serene!
Get your mood bracelets!
Please?
Oh, I had a lovely time
at dinner tonight.
So did I.
- Oh, by the way
- I loved how you performed
- The heimlich maneuver on me
- and I wasn't even choking.
- How about a little
- bedtime story?
- I'm a little too old
- for a bedtime story.
- Okay, we'll just
- skip the story.
You little devil.
- I'm going to lock
- my door tonight.
Well, ray, I had a great time
with Lisa tonight.
Yeah, that's nice.
- You know, Lisa could
- be your next mother.
Hmm, that's nice.
Good night, son.
Yeah, good night, Jimmy.
What?!
Hey, tamera, your company's
doing real well.
- That was a good move
- to buy out that blow pop guy.
Yeah, but I hardly
have any money left.
In that case you have to use
the business principle of
o.p.m.
-"O.p.m."?
-Other people's money.
You sell shares
of your companies
to the other kids.
- Use the capital
- to buy more companies
To make more money,
and eventually...
Wait a minute.
- You can't skip out
- to The Bahamas.
- Well, by that time
- the project will be over.
Man, you make business
sound like such fun.
- What about you Tia?
- How you doing, Tia?
Not so good.
- After selling my so-called
- "mood" bracelets
- I had a hard time looking
- at myself in the mirror.
Hey, I've been there.
Here's a little trick.
- When you look in the mirror,
- avoid eye contact.
Focus on your nose.
Oh...
Ha.
Mm.
Green is not serene.
Ooh, it's permanent.
I can't believe it.
- He's got everybody in this
- house bamboozled.
Tamera's roped in, and beware,
he's working on Tia.
Well, I'm all for it
- if it'll help her unload
- these dumb bracelets.
- Am I the only one
- who can see through him?
- Apparently!
- You're too close to him.
- Because you got too much
- emotional baggage.
- Yeah, I got a lot of
- emotional baggage, all right.
I got a complete matching set.
I got a garment, carry-on
two-suiter, overnight,
and a tote.
- Believe me, sooner or later,
- he's going to hurt you.
Hurt me? How can he hurt me?
I'm bigger than him.
- To let him tell it,
- you two are an item.
He's even thinking
about marriage.
- Ooh. Our dark
- little secret is out.
We're going to elope
and I'll become
your wicked stepmother.
Then I'll take you
to the cellar
and beat you.
- You know why I am
- going to beat you ray,
- I am gonna beat you
- because you are dumb enough
- To even think I'd consider
- marrying your father.
I feel sorry for the poor man.
- He's divorced, he's broke,
- and he's short.
These are mercy dates.
You're dating because
you feel sorry for him?
Yeah.
Oh, I see what's going on here.
- You're worried about being
- like your father, aren't you?
Well, you're nothing like him.
Thank you.
- He's charming,
- adventurous, exciting
Captivating...
Oh, ambidextrous.
Thank you very much.
Memo.
Roger. I want to take over
Pete's peanut brittle
and I want it now.
Oh, by the way Tia...
- Have you thought
- about my offer?
We feel the need to diversify
into casual apparel.
Sorry, tamera. Nothing doing.
T&m jewelry is not for sale.
Hey! All the businesses
in tamera industries
thrive and grow.
Look.
Check out this chart
- I had somebody else make for
- me.
This is all since last Tuesday.
You mean "bloody Tuesday"?
Tia, you're my sister...
And I love you, babe...
But this is business.
I take no prisoners.
Here are today's receipts, t.C.
We'll do lunch.
I think you'll be very happy.
Mm-hmm.
What?
- Either hand it over
- or stand still for a frisking.
Okay, I choose frisking.
And take your time.
Just hand it over.
I need a little mad money.
Ever heard of profit sharing?
Hi, marcia. Come on.
We've got to strategize.
Tia, I've got
good news and bad news.
The good news is
I'm selling my half
of the t&M jewelry company
to tamera.
That's the good news?
Well, then what's the bad news?
- The bad news is I bet you hate
- the good news.
Here's our standard contract.
- Just sign these in triplicates,
- initial here
And put your phone number here.
- Just a minute,
- I want to talk with you.
-Not right now, ray.
-Oh, yes, right now.
- Well, it's official.
- In just three days
- You've turned tamera
- into Leona Helmsley.
- I was just trying to help
- my granddaughter.
- That's not what
- I'm talking about.
You managed to undo
every value I tried
to instill in her.
Values I didn't get from you.
Look, I can understand
why you're angry, son.
- And as long as you're
- already angry
- I got a little
- confession to make.
When I first came here
- I wasn't really that upset
- about your mother leaving me.
- It was the excuse I was using
- to get some free eats
Catch some zs,
and get a little closer
to the Canadian border.
I knew it. You had everybody
eating out of your hand.
But not Mr. Killjoy.
I knew you were up to no good.
- It all hit me
- like a ton of bricks
- When the love
- of my life dumped me.
Well, maybe mom
will take you back.
Mom?!
I'm talking about Lisa.
- Lisa's already
- the love of your life?
I work fast.
I thought she felt
the same way about me
but I guess I was wrong.
There's a laugh...
Me, the sucker.
The Mark.
The foil.
The sap.
The pigeon.
The rube.
- Well, now maybe you can grow
- into a better person
A better father...
A better grandfather.
Maybe. Anyway, I got
to be shoving off tomorrow.
- I told you, I still got
- that tea deal brewing.
Right. The tea deal.
You're running away again.
Just like when I was a kid.
- What you are talking about
- you turned out fine.
You got a nice house.
You got a family.
What are you complaining about?
It had nothing to do with you.
Yes, it did have to do with me
- because if I was there,
- none of this
Would have happened.
- Take your profits
- where you can.
I didn't mean that.
- I wish you were there,
- that's all.
Yeah, well
I wish I'd been there myself.
- Maybe i'd
- have turned out better.
Tamera, what's the matter?
The bottom fell out.
Of your companies?
No, the cups!
The stupid cups were faulty.
No, they weren't faulty.
I did that.
Why did you sabotage my cups?
Because, I took my sweet
little granddaughter
and I turned her into
a power-hungry egomaniac.
So, I decided
to teach you a lesson
and the lesson is
- no matter how smart
- you think you are in business
Something can always go wrong.
- Why couldn't you just tell me
- I was wigging?
Huh!
- Had I known what that
- was, I would have.
I had to sell my company.
I lost my blouse!
I was forced to take
ten cents on a dollar
from a corporate raider.
I'd like to meet that kid.
Memo to myself.
Remember to thank tamera
and Mr. Campbell in my speech
accepting the junior
business person award.
Oh, Jimmy! Here's a little
snack for the plane...
Some of my peach cobbler.
Well, thank you.
I'll savor every cobble.
Uh! There's the taxi.
I wish you could stay.
Me too, grandpa.
Yeah I'd like to but I have
to close that tea deal.
This could be the big one.
- Let me make
- a little investment.
No.
- Come on. Put me down
- for a thousand.
Oh well, if you insist.
You won't regret it.
Nice seeing you again, son.
Good seeing you too, Jim.
Dad.
Bye.
Oh, don't look now, ray
- but you were actually sounding
- like a son.
Yeah, I know.
He fancies himself
a slick businessman.
- I think I got to know him
- a little bit better.
He got $1,000 out of you.
No come on, I just felt sorry
for him and those tearooms.
- No, this is the first
- time he didn't con me.
Mm-hmm.
Or did he?
Nah. He didn't con me.
Nah...
He didn't con me.
Not this time.
Lisa, I've got
250 defective cups.
- Is there anything
- you can use them for?
No, tamera. Put them
in the recycling bin
after breakfast.
- -Good morning, everyone.
- -Good morning.
- Oh, boy,
- I got to get out of here.
Ooh, I got to go. I am so late.
Ray, you better not...
- I know I should have a regular
- breakfast but I can't.
I got to get to the office.
See you all.
project going at school
- where we learn
- how to run a business.
- We get fake some money,
- stock or inventory
- And sell the merchandise
- to the other kids.
- The student with the most money
- at the end of project.
Gets their name
on a cool trophy.
Oh, wow!
Ignore her.
My friend marcia and I
are selling jewelry.
- -Hi, marcia.
- -Hi, Tia. Hi, tamera.
So what's the first
order of business
for the t&M
jewelry company?
The first order of business
is changing the name
to the m&T jewelry company.
Well, why don't
we negotiate this
just like real business people?
-Good idea.
-Okay. Call it.
Heads.
Bummer.
♪ Talk about
a two-way twister ♪
♪ shakin' up the family tree
with sibling synchronicity ♪
♪ never knew how
much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go! ♪
Watch any video online with Open-SUBTITLES
Free Browser extension: osdb.link/ext
- ♪ Never knew
- how much I missed ya ♪
♪ I ain't ever gonna
let you go ♪
- Tamara, we've known about this
- project for weeks.
When are you getting to work?
- Hey, it's just
- a rinky-dink school project
And for your information,
I am working.
Roger, will you hurry up
with our project!
- We're going to be late
- for school!
Tamera, when
I'm working for you
I'm always on golden time.
Okay, how's this for a slogan?
"More bangles for your buck."
Go, girl!
Ah, tamera, how's that
punch company going?
Dad, this project is just
for the geeks and gorkuses
who are totally into it.
- Tamera, you'll learn - a lot about having
- Your own business.
It could come in handy.
Dad, I'm not a seller.
I'm a shopper.
You know business it's simple.
- You just have to make - a great product,
- Know your Mark
And above all,
work very very hard.
See? There's always a catch.
- You're a successful
- businessman.
- Maybe you can give
- us some advice.
Let's not trouble daddy.
Come on.
It won't be any trouble at all.
That's real nice...
- You getting involved
- with tamera's schoolwork.
- It is a communication
- between a parent and child
- Is a key to making this place
- a better planet.
Hello?
Yeah...
What do you want?
What? Now?
Okay.
- -Who was that?
- -My father.
- He's on his way here now
- from the airport.
He wants something.
I know it. What is it?
- Maybe he's just dropping by
- to say hello.
My father isn't
a drop-by-to-say-hello
kind of a guy.
He shows up every five years,
always for the same reason...
He either wants money or a safe
haven till things blow over.
He sounds interesting.
You sure he's your father?
Problem is tamera idolizes him.
- She doesn't know
- what he's really like.
Hmm.
Ray, look.
- You getting very,
- very agitated.
- Look at your foot.
- It's shaking just like a dog - When you scratch his belly.
It's my father.
Here. Hide that.
Sonny!
- How you... how you doing,
- Jimmy?
Well?
-Oh, yeah.
-Ahh!
Can this be little tamera?
How about a great big hug?
No, no, Mr. Campbell, I'm Lisa.
I'm terribly sorry, Lisa.
How about a great big hug?
- Lisa is Tia's mother.
- I wrote you about her.
- I guess you didn't
- get the letter.
- I'm having trouble
- getting my mail.
I been in this
witness protection program
for a few months.
Ray told me you lived
on the edge, Mr. Campbell.
Oh please. My friends
call me soupy.
Ohh, I get it...
Because your name is Campbell.
No. Because I'm always
in hot water.
- Oh, ray, your little
- daddy's so adorable.
Yeah.
- Well, how about
- some coffee, soupy?
I'd prefer if you'd brew this.
It's kowloon poy San tea
- from the premiere
- of Singapore's private stock.
It's part
of my latest venture...
A string of tearooms.
- I figure that coffeehouse
- craze has peaked.
Isn't tearooms
a great idea, ray?
No.
So...
- Looks like you're
- doing pretty good
In your limousine
business, son, hmm?
Moving on up.
All right, come on, Jimmy.
- How much you want - me to invest in
- This tearoom scam?
Oh, sorry, but that scam...
Deal has been fully funded.
Okay, here you go.
Oh, isn't that cute?
Like father, like son.
Oh, the fact is,
I do have a bit of bad news.
Aha! I knew you'd get
- to the real reason
- you showed up.
- Your mother and I
- are getting divorced.
Oh. Oh, I'm so sorry, soupy.
Wait. He walked out
on my mother 17 years ago.
All right.
So I'm not totally blameless
but it still hurts.
Yeah, right.
- It made me realize that I was
- taking my family for granted.
- I know I was never around
- when you were growing up
And I know that damage is done.
But I would like to spend
some time with
my granddaughter.
- Yeah, sure,
- with proper supervision.
Maybe you two need to be alone.
Oh, I know you
must really be hurt.
- I know what happens to men
- when I dump them.
I'm devastated.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Mm-mm-mm.
Maybe this was the jolt
you needed, Jimmy.
As they say in Singapore...
Mm-hmm.
Which means?
"That woman be fine."
- Oh, I'm sorry, son.
- Where were we?
You were feeling devastated?
Yeah, right.
Don't worry, marcia.
We'll sell a bracelet tomorrow.
Oh, my gosh, Tia.
I've been wearing
one of our bracelets
all day and look.
It turned my wrist green.
Ew!
Well, just wear a lot
of yellows and browns.
- Cool. Hey, I'll see you
- tomorrow.
- -Okay. Bye.
- -Bye.
-There she is!
-What?!
My little tan buttercup!
Help! Ee-ya!
Grandpa!
No, no, I give up!
- Grandpa,
- it's me tamera.
Oops. I am so rude.
Grandpa, this is
my twin sister, Tia.
Yeah, we've met.
I am sorry I kicked you,
but I didn't have
my pepper spray.
- Please to meet you sir
- my name's Roger.
Hi, Roger.
- Tamara is always
- talking about you.
- Didn't you use to run track
- at north western?
No, I was run
out of north western.
Oh! This must be
that school project
- your father
- was telling me about.
Yeah. Pretending to run a
business, talk about lame.
Lame? There's nothing more fun
than chewing up the competition
- and spitting them out
- like bad meat.
How will I do that with
something as weeny as punch?
Oh-ho!
Are you kidding me?
That's a cinch.
Step into my office.
The first thing you got to do
is cut your
production cost, okay?
Ah, here we go.
Mm. Okay.
- Now take this,
- pour half here like this.
Aha! Okay.
We add a little h2o.
Shake, shake, shake.
Voila! taste that.
It tastes about the same.
Of course.
- You have just doubled
- your profits.
Hey, here's another great idea.
You create a demand.
Give away salty pretzels
with your punch.
- But Alfie cisneros already had
- the pretzel booth.
Hey!
We could merge with Alfie,
eventually buy him out
- and then slowly but surely
- ruin the other kids.
Now you got it.
Mr.campbell
do you have any tips
to boost the bracelet business?
- I heard they turn
- your wrist green.
Well, we just have
to turn a negative
into a positive.
Ah! Advertise them
as mood bracelets.
Yeah!
You could tell people
that green is serene.
Exactly. You're a natural.
- Well, that doesn't seem
- to be honest.
You sure you two are related?
Mm-hmm.
Uh-uh. Lisa, you are an artist
and the frying pan
is your canvas.
I don't mean to sound fresh
- but we should take you public
- and franchise you.
- Oh, soupy, I never been called
- a franchise before.
I've only been privately held.
Oh, boy.
- My wife used to
- fix me breakfast.
Now my life is just
one big, fat regret.
- Want another stack of waffles?
- That always makes - Me feel better.
No, no. I'm fine.
- How about I take you
- out to dinner tonight?
If you don't mind
the company of a bum.
- Oh come on soupy.
- You are not a bum.
- I'd be honored to go to dinner
- with you. My treat.
No! Soupy Campbell has never
let a woman pick up his check.
I insist we split it.
- That's the least I could do
- for imposing.
Oh no soupy,
you are not imposing.
I better clean up your room
- check your laundry
- and take back your videos.
Man, these pretzels are salty.
I need a cup of punch.
I'm afraid the prices
have gone up. It's now three.
It was one a few minutes ago.
D-ohh! You're gouging me, man.
We ought to try
some of these creative
marketing methods
- or else put a fork in us...
- We're done.
- Yeah, but how do
- we water down jewelry?
We don't have any choice.
Mood bracelets!
Green is serene!
Get your mood bracelets!
Please?
Oh, I had a lovely time
at dinner tonight.
So did I.
- Oh, by the way
- I loved how you performed
- The heimlich maneuver on me
- and I wasn't even choking.
- How about a little
- bedtime story?
- I'm a little too old
- for a bedtime story.
- Okay, we'll just
- skip the story.
You little devil.
- I'm going to lock
- my door tonight.
Well, ray, I had a great time
with Lisa tonight.
Yeah, that's nice.
- You know, Lisa could
- be your next mother.
Hmm, that's nice.
Good night, son.
Yeah, good night, Jimmy.
What?!
Hey, tamera, your company's
doing real well.
- That was a good move
- to buy out that blow pop guy.
Yeah, but I hardly
have any money left.
In that case you have to use
the business principle of
o.p.m.
-"O.p.m."?
-Other people's money.
You sell shares
of your companies
to the other kids.
- Use the capital
- to buy more companies
To make more money,
and eventually...
Wait a minute.
- You can't skip out
- to The Bahamas.
- Well, by that time
- the project will be over.
Man, you make business
sound like such fun.
- What about you Tia?
- How you doing, Tia?
Not so good.
- After selling my so-called
- "mood" bracelets
- I had a hard time looking
- at myself in the mirror.
Hey, I've been there.
Here's a little trick.
- When you look in the mirror,
- avoid eye contact.
Focus on your nose.
Oh...
Ha.
Mm.
Green is not serene.
Ooh, it's permanent.
I can't believe it.
- He's got everybody in this
- house bamboozled.
Tamera's roped in, and beware,
he's working on Tia.
Well, I'm all for it
- if it'll help her unload
- these dumb bracelets.
- Am I the only one
- who can see through him?
- Apparently!
- You're too close to him.
- Because you got too much
- emotional baggage.
- Yeah, I got a lot of
- emotional baggage, all right.
I got a complete matching set.
I got a garment, carry-on
two-suiter, overnight,
and a tote.
- Believe me, sooner or later,
- he's going to hurt you.
Hurt me? How can he hurt me?
I'm bigger than him.
- To let him tell it,
- you two are an item.
He's even thinking
about marriage.
- Ooh. Our dark
- little secret is out.
We're going to elope
and I'll become
your wicked stepmother.
Then I'll take you
to the cellar
and beat you.
- You know why I am
- going to beat you ray,
- I am gonna beat you
- because you are dumb enough
- To even think I'd consider
- marrying your father.
I feel sorry for the poor man.
- He's divorced, he's broke,
- and he's short.
These are mercy dates.
You're dating because
you feel sorry for him?
Yeah.
Oh, I see what's going on here.
- You're worried about being
- like your father, aren't you?
Well, you're nothing like him.
Thank you.
- He's charming,
- adventurous, exciting
Captivating...
Oh, ambidextrous.
Thank you very much.
Memo.
Roger. I want to take over
Pete's peanut brittle
and I want it now.
Oh, by the way Tia...
- Have you thought
- about my offer?
We feel the need to diversify
into casual apparel.
Sorry, tamera. Nothing doing.
T&m jewelry is not for sale.
Hey! All the businesses
in tamera industries
thrive and grow.
Look.
Check out this chart
- I had somebody else make for
- me.
This is all since last Tuesday.
You mean "bloody Tuesday"?
Tia, you're my sister...
And I love you, babe...
But this is business.
I take no prisoners.
Here are today's receipts, t.C.
We'll do lunch.
I think you'll be very happy.
Mm-hmm.
What?
- Either hand it over
- or stand still for a frisking.
Okay, I choose frisking.
And take your time.
Just hand it over.
I need a little mad money.
Ever heard of profit sharing?
Hi, marcia. Come on.
We've got to strategize.
Tia, I've got
good news and bad news.
The good news is
I'm selling my half
of the t&M jewelry company
to tamera.
That's the good news?
Well, then what's the bad news?
- The bad news is I bet you hate
- the good news.
Here's our standard contract.
- Just sign these in triplicates,
- initial here
And put your phone number here.
- Just a minute,
- I want to talk with you.
-Not right now, ray.
-Oh, yes, right now.
- Well, it's official.
- In just three days
- You've turned tamera
- into Leona Helmsley.
- I was just trying to help
- my granddaughter.
- That's not what
- I'm talking about.
You managed to undo
every value I tried
to instill in her.
Values I didn't get from you.
Look, I can understand
why you're angry, son.
- And as long as you're
- already angry
- I got a little
- confession to make.
When I first came here
- I wasn't really that upset
- about your mother leaving me.
- It was the excuse I was using
- to get some free eats
Catch some zs,
and get a little closer
to the Canadian border.
I knew it. You had everybody
eating out of your hand.
But not Mr. Killjoy.
I knew you were up to no good.
- It all hit me
- like a ton of bricks
- When the love
- of my life dumped me.
Well, maybe mom
will take you back.
Mom?!
I'm talking about Lisa.
- Lisa's already
- the love of your life?
I work fast.
I thought she felt
the same way about me
but I guess I was wrong.
There's a laugh...
Me, the sucker.
The Mark.
The foil.
The sap.
The pigeon.
The rube.
- Well, now maybe you can grow
- into a better person
A better father...
A better grandfather.
Maybe. Anyway, I got
to be shoving off tomorrow.
- I told you, I still got
- that tea deal brewing.
Right. The tea deal.
You're running away again.
Just like when I was a kid.
- What you are talking about
- you turned out fine.
You got a nice house.
You got a family.
What are you complaining about?
It had nothing to do with you.
Yes, it did have to do with me
- because if I was there,
- none of this
Would have happened.
- Take your profits
- where you can.
I didn't mean that.
- I wish you were there,
- that's all.
Yeah, well
I wish I'd been there myself.
- Maybe i'd
- have turned out better.
Tamera, what's the matter?
The bottom fell out.
Of your companies?
No, the cups!
The stupid cups were faulty.
No, they weren't faulty.
I did that.
Why did you sabotage my cups?
Because, I took my sweet
little granddaughter
and I turned her into
a power-hungry egomaniac.
So, I decided
to teach you a lesson
and the lesson is
- no matter how smart
- you think you are in business
Something can always go wrong.
- Why couldn't you just tell me
- I was wigging?
Huh!
- Had I known what that
- was, I would have.
I had to sell my company.
I lost my blouse!
I was forced to take
ten cents on a dollar
from a corporate raider.
I'd like to meet that kid.
Memo to myself.
Remember to thank tamera
and Mr. Campbell in my speech
accepting the junior
business person award.
Oh, Jimmy! Here's a little
snack for the plane...
Some of my peach cobbler.
Well, thank you.
I'll savor every cobble.
Uh! There's the taxi.
I wish you could stay.
Me too, grandpa.
Yeah I'd like to but I have
to close that tea deal.
This could be the big one.
- Let me make
- a little investment.
No.
- Come on. Put me down
- for a thousand.
Oh well, if you insist.
You won't regret it.
Nice seeing you again, son.
Good seeing you too, Jim.
Dad.
Bye.
Oh, don't look now, ray
- but you were actually sounding
- like a son.
Yeah, I know.
He fancies himself
a slick businessman.
- I think I got to know him
- a little bit better.
He got $1,000 out of you.
No come on, I just felt sorry
for him and those tearooms.
- No, this is the first
- time he didn't con me.
Mm-hmm.
Or did he?
Nah. He didn't con me.
Nah...
He didn't con me.
Not this time.
Lisa, I've got
250 defective cups.
- Is there anything
- you can use them for?
No, tamera. Put them
in the recycling bin
after breakfast.
- -Good morning, everyone.
- -Good morning.
- Oh, boy,
- I got to get out of here.
Ooh, I got to go. I am so late.
Ray, you better not...
- I know I should have a regular
- breakfast but I can't.
I got to get to the office.
See you all.