Shtisel (2013–…): Season 2, Episode 6 - Snow - full transcript

We're leaving tomorrow morning.

-What?
-For Antwerp.

PREVIOUSLY ON

Mrs. Konigsberg, I come to you
in your capacity as matchmaker.

Then come in,
can I offer you something to eat?

-Is Libbi there?
-No.

-Can you tell her I called?
-Don't call here again, okay?

Congratulations, Shtisel,
you won the Wasserman award.

-It turns out, I'm getting an award.
-Screw up of the Year?

I know what my problem is.

-My father.
-Your father is a very nice man.



-Yeah?
-We meet from time to time.

Abot Hameiri Barkai Productions

Talisma Productions

Created by
Yehonatan Indursky and Ori Elon

Dov Glickman

Michael Aloni

Sasson Gabay

Neta Riskin

Zohar Strauss

Shira Haas

Hadas Yaron

Casting
Hila Yuval

Executive Producers
Eitan Abot and Guy Hameiri

Line Producers
Isca Gur-Luzon and Aviv Ben Shlush



Art Director
Shimri Gal Novak

Music
Avi Belleli

Cinematography
Roey Roth

Editor
Gilad Ariel

Screenplay Editor
Sayed Kashua

Screenplay
Ori Elon and Yehonatan Indursky

Executive Producer and Editor
Dikla Barkai

Director
Alon Zingman

SHTISEL

Kive, I've been thinking about this...

you are a talented young man.

What?

Not everyone makes omelets like this.

-Thank you.
-Absolutely.

And you paint, too.

Very nice.

Omelets, painting...

I can almost say
that you're making something of yourself.

That's all you have to say this morning?

Why? You have something special planned?

No.

Nothing.

Exactly.

It's 5:30 in the morning, for God's sake.

Hello?

Hello?

Is that you, Krakovich?

May you swallow an umbrella
that will open in your gut. Amen!

Evil people.

He sits on the balcony.

There's an indent in the sofa
the shape of his bum.

And now with that award he's getting
it's even worse.

It's formal approval that being
a bum is just fine.

Fine? It's excellent.

-You understand?
-I understand very well.

Blessed are You,
God creator of sustenance.

Amen.

Menukha...

don't you have any girls to offer him?

You know how many girls I offered him?

-And?
-What "and"?

Blessed are You,
God at whose word all came to be.

Amen. He keeps saying
he'll think about it.

He's stuck.

Like a klutz.

Exactly. A klutz.

But the truth is...

I understand him.

He learned from the best.

Me?

As long as you don't make a move,
what do you expect of him?

-Make a move where?
-Where?

This is the fifth time we're meeting,
Shulem.

What are we, Modern Orthodox?

Let's take it up a notch.

But Menukha,

it's hardly been two months...

-since your late husband--
-So?

On the contrary, it was his will.

Yes, last year we sat in the living room
and he said,

"Dearest Menukha,

if I bite the dust before you,

know that Shulem Shtisel
is the man for you."

-Seriously?
-Yes.

-That's what he said?
-With those exact words.

-You don't say.
-What do you say?

Of course,

if that's what your late husband said...
After all, he was the expert.

I can't argue with that.

I'm just thinking out loud that...

maybe we should talk about this...

in a month...

from now.

What do...

you say?

I say stop playing games
and wasting my time.

You and your screwed-up brat
can park your bums on the sofa all day

waiting for the Messiah for all I care.

My dear, it is when
the laundry is piling up,

when the sink is full of dishes

that you must overcome
and fill your heart with thanks.

You must remember the light in the dreary,

the poetry in the mundane,
the light in the dreary...

-How are you, Tovi?
-I hope you're not here for lunch.

-...the poetry in the mundane...
-What, no food?

I'm starving,
I have to return to study at 1:30.

I've been busy all day
with this embroidery.

-What's that?
-For Yanki's Torah party.

All right...

that's okay.

Is there nothing left over from Shabbat?

Cholent? Ferfel?

...who propagated that lie

that there's a conflict
between motherhood and fulfillment?

Motherhood is the highest form
of fulfillment...

Listen, Herstik is in the hospital,
some of the guys want to visit.

Can you turn that thing down?

Your husband comes home
from Kolel for 15 minutes,

-he wants to talk to you.
-Okay, but I'm listening.

The guys, Herstik, I hear every word.

I said that some of the guys want to go.

Never mind.

Who's the fool
who called this a smart phone?

What's wrong, Shtisel?

Talk to me.

No, never mind,
I don't want to burden you.

My trunk is empty, load it up.

Okay...

There's this girl...

-I mean--
-I got it. What's the problem?

There's more than one,
but I just don't think she wants me.

What are you doing to make her want you?

That's just it,
there's not too much I can do.

I know, give it to me.

-What do you know? You know--
-You have to use force.

Fine.

You can always sneak in a phone call,
a smile.

Take me, for example.
I won my two wives over with yellow roses.

I brought them roses to work.

What a crappy phone!

Idelman, watch it with the foul language.

-Shut up, Pinchik.
-Here, you can borrow mine for a few days.

No, it's a kosher phone,
it won't do me any good.

I hope Farshlufen doesn't forget
to bring me the iPhone.

-Farshlufen? From where?
-Belgium.

He went to Belgium to raise money.

Belgium? When's his flight?

-He's probably in the taxi by now.
-He went.

Anshin!

Farshlufen! Farshlufen! Amram! Wait up!

I'm so glad I caught you in time.

Listen, I need a huge favor.

Sorry, Shtisel, I don't have room
for more cigarettes.

-No, it's not that.
-No Chivas either.

-My suitcase is full. What then?
-No, no.

I need you to take something for me.

-What?
-A letter.

I'll give you the address,
it's in Antwerp.

Please, Farshlufen, do this for me.

What's in Antwerp?

A girl.

Shtisel, you should have said!
It's a matter of the heart.

Thank you.

We don't compromise when it comes
to matters of the heart.

Thank you.

Just make it quick
so I don't miss my taxi.

Thank you, sure.

Hold on, I'll write it.

Can I use your back, Amram?

Of course, I'd be honored,
for a love letter from Shtisel.

Here, don't lose it.
I wrote the address on the back.

Wait.

Give this to her, too, okay?

Of course, of course.

In matters of the heart...

we don't compromise.

You must eat more, Shmuel.

I ate, Blumi.

Soon, I'll be eating too much.

So, what's new at the Kolel?

We got to the chapter
on dairy and meat laws.

You know, the debates
between Rashi and Maimonides.

We even covered the Sefer Terumah.

What would we do without the Torah?

I look at other patients in this ward,
but didn't find Torah.

-It's awful.
-Awful.

Blumi, go take a nap.

You haven't slept since yesterday.

I have my two sages with me, thank God.

-Will you stay for another 30 minutes?
-Thirty minutes?

Yes, of course, gladly.

But Shmuel, promised me
that by the time I get back

you'll have eaten this cottage cheese.

God willing, Blumi.

If that's what it takes
for you to take a nap.

With your permission,
I'd like to say something.

The Midrash says that illness
is a gift from God.

And Jacob the Patriarch requested illness
to buy men time.

Time for soul searching,
time to be with his loved ones.

When you're ill, you realize
how much people care for you.

The degree of love and devotion
of the people close to you.

This week we were told
to look into a kidney transplant...

and this morning my wife told me
that she underwent,

on her own, all the required tests

and thank God, she's a match.
She'll give me her kidney.

I don't know what I've done
to deserve a woman like this.

A woman of valor.

Where have you been?

I have to be at the mother's committee
in 30 minutes.

-You're watching the kids.
-I'm sorry.

I called the Kolel an hour ago,
they told me you left.

Yes, I was at the hospital.

Why? Are you all right?

Zvi Arye?

I was at the hospital...

this isn't easy to say.

Tell me, you're stressing me out.

I don't want to sadden you, Tovi...

but I have an illness.

-No.
-Yes.

-Since when?
-I haven't been feeling well for a while,

but I didn't want to worry you.

-What can I say, I'm a sick man.
-My poor baby.

The only option is a cutback.

I know, that's what this meeting is for.

-I mean dismissing people, Shulem.
-I don't want to dismiss anyone.

I have to tell Katzburg to work hard
for what he gets,

-otherwise he'll be selling pretzels.
-You have to tell Kravitz, too.

-Kravitz can sell pencils.
-Right.

Aliza, may I ask you...

a personal question?

Of course.

I recently met this widow, Menukha.

-She wants our relationship to progress.
-She wants to get married.

Do I know?

Yes, get married.

But I've already been married,
to my Dvora of blessed memory.

-What does this have to do with Dvora?
-I'm an old man.

A groom? Marriage?

I already stood under the canopy.
The past is in the past.

-I think she's right.
-Okay, but...

how can I say this?

My heart still belongs to Dvora.

Shulem, it's a great privilege

to have been married to a woman

that you loved so much.

Yes, a great privilege.

You know...

when I started meeting the man
who is now my husband,

my heart was bound to someone else.
Bound very tight.

I was, as the girls would say,

head over heels in love with him.

-Head over heels? Really?
-I'm not blaming him for anything.

I'm just saying I was lucky

that I turned my back on him.

I put him behind me, I moved on.

It's the best decision I ever made.

-Thank God, then.
-I'm not finished.

You asked for my opinion,
so listen to what I have to say.

Every word, absolutely.

You're not young anymore, Shulem,
and you're alone.

If you have an opportunity
to be with a nice woman,

seize it with both hands.

Why didn't you tell me right away?

I didn't want to worry you.

But what am I here for,
if we can't go through this together?

You're right.

-Tovi, I want to ask you something?
-Yes.

Would you be willing to go to the hospital
with me tomorrow to undergo a test?

Me?

What does this have to do with me?

I may need a kidney transplant,

and if your kidney is a match,
that would be best.

What?

We'll have you undergo some tests
to see if you're a match, okay?

This could save me, Tovi.

All right, if there's no other option.

-Is there no other option?
-What do you mean?

I don't know, then I'd be sick, too.

Think about the kids.

As it is, their dad is sick, and now,
their mom will be missing a kidney, too?

In any case, what's the rush
with all these tests?

Maybe the doctors are wrong.

We should go to Rabbi Fihrer to pray.
Maybe this is just a mistake.

Did you see that, Dvora?

I wanted to replace
those chairs ten years ago.

Yes, I remember.

Why didn't we?

You said they're good
for another ten years at least.

-So I was right?
-Yes.

This view from below is nice.

The living room looks different.

-As if I was never in it.
-True, true.

Too bad I'm in so much pain
that I can't move.

-Which foot hurts?
-The right one.

Maybe you twisted it,
it's happened before.

-I twisted my foot?
-About 20 years ago, at Purim.

You held Kiva and Zvi Arye
in your arms...

-when you were dancing.
-That's right.

Yes, I remember.

If I tried to carry those two today,

I'd be a goner.

-Praise God.
-Praise God.

Dvora, can you get up and bring me
the phone so I can call an ambulance?

How can I get up?

You know, get up.

I'm dead, Shulem.

It's this wonderful complex with studios.

-The Light Rail takes you right there.
-That's great.

-I'll go tomorrow morning.
-Tomorrow morning?

-You got your own studio, go celebrate.
-I will.

Of course, Kaufman, thank you.

Say hello to Hadassah,
she has a studio right next to yours.

-It's important that you get to know her.
-All right, I'll say hello.

-I'm sorry, this is an overseas call.
-Okay. That's fine.

-Hello, Shtisel?
-Farshlufen?

-Where are you?
-You won't believe this, Shtisel.

The streets are covered with snow.

It won't stop snowing.

-So, you won't be able to see her.
-I told you, Shtisel,

no compromises on matters of the heart.

-I'm at the address you gave me.
-You are?

-That's wonderful.
-But, the flower didn't make it.

That's okay.

-You want me to get her another flower?
-No, I want it to be that one.

And your letter, Shtisel, it's all wet.
I could barely read it.

You weren't supposed to read it.

What can I say, Shtisel,
it's well written.

-I can feel your heart.
-Thank you.

Okay, I'm here. I'm ringing the doorbell.

-Wait.
-What?

Don't ring.

I want to make sure--
-I already did.

I'm keeping you on the line,
so you can listen.

-Hello, Ma'am.
-Hello.

I'm looking for Libbi Shtisel.

-I'm Libbi.
-Well...

this is for you.

Delivery from the Holy Land
from the most esteemed,

the dearest, Akiva Shtisel.

I gave her the letter.

She can't really make it out,
because it's all wet.

-You mean she's there?
-Yes, right in front of me.

A most important rebbetzin.

-Wait, is that Akiva?
-Yes, absolutely.

-Kiva?
-Libbi.

I... admit that you surprised me.

Is that a good thing?

I just happened to find out
that my friend will be close by and...

I miss you a little.

I...

miss you a little, too.

I was just looking out the window
at the snow

and wondering what the weather's like
from your balcony.

I have my own phone now.
We can talk whenever we want.

-Yes.
-I wrote the number down...

or maybe it got all wet, too.

-What for, Kive?
-What?

Why talk? What difference will it make?

For the sake of talking.

I'm still looking for a match, Kiva.

I miss you so much.

I'm meeting potential matches,
I'm looking for a husband.

-I want to come see you, Libbi.
-No, Kive, you can't.

Yes, I will, I have money.

-I'm buying a plane ticket tomorrow.
-Don't do that.

In any case, all flights were cancelled
due to the snow--

You can't dissuade me.
I've made up my mind.

-I'm coming, who cares about the snow.
-No, Kive, no. Don't do it.

Why not?

You'll be happy to see me, won't you?

No, I won't.

It will only cause me pain.

Please don't call me anymore.

Please.

All right.

-Goodbye.
-Goodbye, Kive.

Yes!

Shulem, it's me, Menukha. Can I come in?

Of course, come on in.

I've been calling and calling
and you don't pick up.

Listen, I've been thinking,
it's all right if you need more time.

What counts is that we enjoy
each other's company.

Absolutely.

Wait, what are you doing on the floor?
Yoga?

No, I had a little fall.

My God, why didn't you call me?

I can't get to the phone.
What, use my ESP?

My God, I knew that something
was wrong. I knew it.

It hurts. Wait, I'm dizzy.

-Kive, hold up.
-What?

-Hello.
-Hello.

-So?
-Nothing.

I've just returned from evening prayer,
I wanted to say hi to dad.

-Great.
-Wait, Kive, I have a question.

-Don't you want to go up first?
-Just a little question.

Okay.

Let's say one of us siblings,
like me for example...

-Forget it, not now.
-What's the question?

If I needed something from you, Kive,
would you give it to me?

-Yes, I think so. What do you need?
-Nothing.

If you need money, I can help you out.

No! I don't need money.

Blessed are You, God,
at whose word all came to be.

Amen.

-What did you say these are called?
-Croutons.

-These cartons are wonderful.
-Not cartons, croutons.

Fine, croutons, whatever.

It's an original recipe of mine.

I take the leftover challah, dry it out,

and marinate it in olive oil.

Bravo, bravo.

-The pain is so bad.
-Wait, I'll help you.

I think you should put your leg
on this chair.

Won't it hurt?

-Give me your leg, slowly. There you go.
-Be very careful.

-It hurts so much.
-There you go.

Much better.

Hello there!

Zvi Arye, Kive.

I'm glad you're here, children.

Indeed, I'm so glad you showed
up like this.

How... How are you?

How are you, Dad?

Who is she?

Who is she? Indeed, who is she? Indeed.

I'd like you to meet... Menukha.

She is... I mean...

she's my bride.

Yes, indeed.
We decided to get engaged.

Mazal Tov.

-Mazal Tov.
-Mazal Tov, Dad.

I'm telling you now, Shulem,

if you want to live here,
we're going to renovate.

Absolutely. What?

We have to renovate,
especially the kitchen.

-Congratulations, Dad, Menukha.
-Thank you.

-Mazal Tov.
-Mazal Tov, Lipa.

Thank you.

-Well, Dad, who would have thought?
-Absolutely. Surely not me.

You're Giti Shtisel.

My, how you've grown.

-I am Giti, but my last name is Weiss.
-Yes, I remember, of course.

-She has six kids, thank God.
-Praise God, may he keep them safe.

Where did she come from? Who is she?

Move that out of the way.

She looks like a woman
who will cook his favorite dishes.

Fine, so she'll cook,
that's not what counts.

What counts?

What a surprise.
Did you know this was coming?

Not at all.

-May you be next.
-Amen. All in good time.

Akiva, may you be next.

All in good time.

-I don't envy you.
-What do I care?

Kiva, I have a question,
give me an honest answer.

What?

Let's say I'm sick
and I need a kidney transplant...

would you donate your kidney?

-Of course I would.
-Be honest with me.

I'm your brother, aren't I?

Zvi Aryeh, cut it out, it's all good.

Well... does anyone have
some Torah insight for us?

Zvi Arye, say something.

All right.

Go ahead.

There's a Midrash that says
that illness is a gift from God.

There are all kinds of gifts.
This one is a form of test.

There are all kinds of tests,
multiple choice tests, open end tests.

-What I'm trying to say--
-What are you trying to say, Zvi Arye?

-Menukha, I have a question.
-Me? Yes.

If Father becomes ill, God forbid,
and needs a kidney transplant.

-God forbid.
-Would you donate your kidney?

Gladly, but I already donated
to my late husband.

Very nice, very nice.
Shall we sing something?

-Kive, sing something.
-Of course.

It will be heard in the cities of Judea--

Hold on! Gentlemen, hold on!

I don't want to spoil the party,
but I have a question.

Let's say I am ill
and I need a kidney transplant,

who here would donate their kidney to me?

Kive already said he would,
but he might not be a match, so...

I have a question.

Whoever would donate their kidney,
raise your hand.

Zvi Arye.

Zvi Arye.

Your kids are something.

-And he's the normal one.
-He is? Well, well.

It will be heard in the cities of Judea

And the outskirts of Jerusalem

Zvi Arye, take it easy, really.

The whole world, Tovi.

The whole world.

Even strangers would donate
their kidney to me.

That's... very moving.

There are at least 15 people in there.

I only need one kidney, Tovi.

Just one.

Yes, all right Menukha, yes.
I'm almost there. Be well.

-So you're not there yet?
-I'm approaching my office, Menukha.

-Does your foot hurt?
-Hardly, hardly.

Hello, Shulem.

-I hear congratulations are in order.
-Yes, yes. Thank you, Aliza.

Truth be told, I was surprised.
I'm proud of you, you did it.

-Shulem, are you all right?
-Are you all right?

-Yes, I'm fine, really. Enough is enough!
-I'm sorry.

I just have to get to my office
and sit down.

You hear me?
I'm almost there. Everything's fine.

All right, Menukha, I'm not hanging up.

I'm listening, don't hang up.

Okay, okay, I'm not hanging up.
There, I'm at the office.

I'll be at my desk in a minute.

There, I'm sitting.

-Who was that?
-Who?

The woman you were talking to.

-She's the secretary.
-Your secretary?

Mine, the school's, the secretary.

It's inappropriate.

That's...

what... etcetera.

-I suggest you replace her.
-Who?

The secretary. Find a male secretary.

-But--
-Shulem,

it's inappropriate for a respectable Jew
like you

to work so closely with a woman.

Menukha, on the contrary,
it has never been an issue.

Do it, and let me know today.

Okay, fine.

If you say so.

Feel good and watch the foot.

God willing.

You know, Dad...

when I woke up this morning
I was wondering

if you really got engaged,
or if it was just a dream.

And what conclusion did you come to?

Mazal Tov, Dad.

Etcetera.