Shrink (2017–…): Season 1, Episode 6 - S.O.S. - full transcript
On the brink of exhaustion from working two jobs, David falls asleep everywhere he goes. He and his mother remember David's father by going to one of his favorite places. David gets advice from an unexpected source.
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[AIRPLANE PASSING OVERHEAD]
You're up early.
I'm actually still up.
Oh, David.
You're burning the candle at both ends.
Oh, there's no more
candle. That's long gone.
I'm just gas-lighting at this point.
But I don't think
that's what that means.
You know what tomorrow is?
I do.
I thought to remember Dad,
we'd go to his favorite spot
on the harbor, like we used to,
and have a picnic, and
I'll make Dad's favorite...
you know, shit on a shingle.
Mom, I don't think chipped
beef and gravy on toast
is very picnicky.
Besides, I don't know
if I can do it tomorrow.
I'm gonna forget you said that, David.
You be ready at noon, rain or shine.
I will, Mom.
[SIGHS]
Okay, well, tell me
more about your work.
Oh, there's this rip-off
artist who doesn't pay a cent,
and I know he has money,
but he's hiding it.
I need to lay down the law.
Well, how would you do that?
How about something like this.
No.
Oh, no.
No, don't do that.
Stop! Don't do that to his face!
No!! No!!
No!! Aah!!
Don't make it sexy!
Oh, no!
Aaaaah! Aah!
[GROANS]
So, this is a hotel room now?
Oh. Sorry.
I'm working two jobs. I'm tired.
Two jobs and still no money?
You are some piece of work.
Doctor, my ass.
I fell asleep in the waiting room.
Bernadette is delightful, by the way.
Sleep is very important to
your mental health, David.
Maybe you're working too many hours.
No, I'm definitely
working too many hours.
I'm doing sessions all day,
then I get maybe an hour
before I go to the store.
And I get home, I'm lucky to
get two more hours of sleep
if Barry decides to not
crank his house music.
Do you think this is affecting
the quality of your work?
I mean...
yes and no.
Are you falling asleep?
So, you know how I told
you about mouse trap?
Mm, I love Mouse Trap.
It's a great board game.
I have a crazy elbow...
sort of that sounds...
Excuse me? Crazy elbow?
No. We don't say crazy in here.
Um, are you... are you listening to me?
Hmm? Yeah, totally.
Okay, 'cause I don't... all right.
All right, cool.
You look like shit, you know?
Oh, yeah?
- You having a rough day?
- You could say that.
Is there anything else
hindering your sleep
other than your schedule?
No, that's pretty much it.
I mean, I've been having a
lot of weird dreams lately,
but that's probably because
I'm in and out of sleep constantly.
Can you describe one
of these dreams for me?
Sure, like the other
day, I had this dream
where I came in here,
and we were having a normal
session just like this,
and then I looked up, and you
were eating a hat sandwich.
[DISTORTED] David?
[DISTORTED] Oh, my God.
You're eating a hat sandwich.
It's delicious.
I can't believe this is happening again.
David?
You just love these hat sandwiches.
[NORMAL VOICE] David!
You were eating a hat sandwich.
You only closed your
eyes for a few seconds.
If you're dreaming the
second you close your eyes,
you're in REM rebound.
That's your brain telling you
it's severely sleep-deprived.
You really need to get some rest.
We you alive when JFK was shot?
What?
We you alive when JFK was... alive?
Stop talking, David. Lie down.
There's a blanket behind you.
Holy shit!
[CHUCKLES]
Why don't you just close your eyes?
Good night, David.
You keep that thing
gassed up for your ma?
- The snow-blower?
- No, Dad, it's electric.
They're almost all electric now.
Oh?
Fancy.
[CHUCKLES]
It's not fancy, that's run of the...
Oh.
Where are you going for dead dad day?
No. Come on. Don't be weird.
Tell me, David.
Tell me before I die again.
You can't die again.
How do you know you're not
dead and this is my dream?
[GASPS DRAMATICALLY]
[LAUGHS]
Stop. Don't do that.
We're going to the
harbor like we always do.
Okay.
[CROWD CHEERING, ORGAN PLAYING]
KASPER: Quite a game of
catch between father and son.
They moved the mound 15
times closer to home plate.
I know what this is.
This is a dead dad dream.
I feel lost, and you represent
the person I'm supposed
to get advice from.
[CHUCKLES] That's not gonna happen, kid.
Yeah, but I need help.
Yeah, well, wake up and ask Rollie.
I'm sure he's got some
real fucking chestnuts.
He's throwing baseballs
to his little boy.
Rollie's all right.
Mom really loves him.
He does a lot of little
stuff, like, you know,
eats the burned piece
of toast at breakfast.
Sounds like a real asshole.
Come on. You want Mom to be happy.
I was her first true love.
I want her to be miserable without me.
Did you know that I get up
out of my grave every day
and go looking for her?
[SCOFFS] Dad.
I'm just giving you shit.
I haven't been to my
grave since the funeral.
Did you know that "Field of Dreams"
was based on a true story?
The true story of 18 men
trapped in a corn field
because of their sins.
Len Kasper... nice touch.
Yeah. He's a great guy.
Len?
If it's not a hot dog, feel
free to put ketchup on it.
Yeah, he never talks back in the dreams.
This dream was brought
to you by Vienna Beef,
your Chicago dog since 1893.
Beef. Beef!
Beef. Beef. Beef. Beef...
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
I've been knocking for 10 minutes.
What the fuck's the matter with you?
Nice to see you, too, Kendra.
You don't look good. Are you hung over?
Did you party last
night? You look like shit.
Amanda only has two Facebook
friends with beards...
one is her dad, and the
other is Jake Arrietta.
I know she's not hooking
up with either one of them.
Okay, can I have my phone back?
So what if Amanda's
dating a guy with a beard?
Little beard, Kendra.
Doug specifically said a little beard.
Okay, you are obsessed with this.
[SIGHS] I'm not obsessed, okay?
I'm actually kind of
seeing somebody regularly.
I just want to make sure
she's not dating a freak, okay?
Okay, can we get back to my session?
Oh, yeah, that's gonna
be a bowl of laughs.
What the fuck is wrong
with you? Are you drunk?
No, I'm just working all
the time, and I don't sleep.
You're practically asleep.
I'm not recording yet,
so I can say shut up!
You just did.
[TELEPHONE LINE RINGING]
Hey, this is Rachel. Leave a message.
[BEEP]
Hey, Rachel, this is David
Tracy... Dr. David Tracy.
Uh, just wanted to check in.
Looks like you missed your appointment,
and I just wanted to make
sure everything was okay.
Hopefully, it wasn't that diner
food we had the other night.
Lord knows it went through me like a...
Anyway, just send me a text or whatever,
and we can figure out another
time for an appointment.
And, um... Yeah, that's...
That's, uh... That's
what I got on my end.
So, okay.
[GOOFY VOICE] Okaaay.
"Okaaay"? What?
Jesus, be more awkward.
Be more of an awkward person.
Can I at least talk to you about girls?
Oh, come on. We were having a good time.
So, I met this girl,
Rachel. She's great.
Then she just disappeared.
Like this?
- Dad, come on.
- [CHUCKLES]
Anyway, as I was saying,
I thought I really
connected with Rachel.
And we had this wonderful
night, and then...
I don't know what I did wrong.
Are we really gonna do this?
It's my dream. Give me what I want.
Fine. I'll tell you what you did wrong.
Rachel wanted you to swing
away, and you took a walk.
A walk is four balls.
No, it's not like that. We
have long-term potential.
You sound like a goddamn accountant.
I think this is what
people in your biz call
an un-addressed pattern of behavior.
Remember Mary Bonscarf?
My seventh-grade girlfriend?
You were a bit much, David.
You had all of eighth grade planned
before we even finished seventh.
I mean, who wants to be tied down
during the last year of junior high?
That's the year you rule the school.
Yeah, but we were a good couple.
We were 13, and you
wanted to settle down.
You can't force settling down,
which is why they call it settling.
Yeah, I got it. Thanks, Mary.
Like sand in a glass of water.
I get it. You can go now.
I don't have to go anywhere.
I got this.
[CROWD CHEERING, ORGAN PLAYS]
The batter has disappeared!
Do you really think this
is a pattern of mine?
Jesus, why are you
making yourself so stupid?
This is your dream.
Remember Amanda?
Hey, David!
We dated for four years,
and then I broke your heart!
Yeah, I remember.
I broke up with you!
I know!
Go, Cubs!
Go, Cubs.
You're really letting
yourself have it in this dream.
This is the worst
dream I've ever been in.
Yeah.
And you think your OCD is getting worse?
Maybe.
I suppose the strongest one
is keeping things parallel
to each other and to
other things in proximity.
Do you like to have
things be perpendic...
Don't do that with your hands, please.
If you like to gesture,
this is a very effective
gesture, and it's very powerful.
Great. Okay.
Does this manifest itself
in other ways in your life?
My kids can't get any sleep.
I... straighten them out
in the middle of the night.
Whoa.
Are you verbally abusive?
No. No, I literally
straighten them in their beds
so that they align
horizontally with the wall.
Mm. You know, if I were a
child, that would scare me.
It would, but they're
pretty much wide awake
because they know I'm coming.
Have you tried researching beds
that would keep them aligned?
Like a coffin?
No.
- God, no.
- That's a great idea.
It wouldn't have to be
mahogany or anything.
I have to say I am not suggesting
that your children sleep in coffins.
Like a pine-wood box.
No, that's worse. That's a crude coffin.
Wouldn't have to call it a coffin.
Call it a sleeping box.
Who doesn't want to
sleep in a sleeping box?
No one wants to sleep in a sleeping box.
♪
[P.A. BEEPS]
JULIA: Paging Dr.
David. Paging Dr. David.
We have an emergency.
The patient is presenting
with polyphasic gravi-deliquio.
Okay, I know what to do.
[JUMBLED VOICES]
Are you gonna fix him with therapy?
No. I'm a doctor.
[CHUCKLES] You're, like, half a doctor.
There's no such thing as half a doctor.
Maybe you could help if
you had a little beard.
[DISTORTED] Little beard.
It's a little beard.
[LAUGHS] Good luck with
your new career, David.
No.
[BICYCLE BELL DINGS]
Want to go for a bike ride?
Yeah, but I can't move this thing.
Fine. I guess I'll go alone.
I want to go, there's just no pedals.
- Bye, David.
- [BICYCLE BELL DINGS]
DOUG: You have to help him, Doctor!
- Who?
- The patient!
You have to hurry!
We're not going anywhere, Doug.
Neither are you, Blondie.
[GASPS]
[CELLPHONE DINGING, SHUTTER CLICKING]
[GROANS]
I was... We were frozen,
and I couldn't move, and...
What are you doing?
Don't worry, these pictures
are only going to Julia.
JULIA: What an idiot!
I thought Rachel was texting me.
- You still haven't heard from her?
- No.
Doug, report to my office...
for professional reasons.
Where I'm going, you cannot follow.
Oh, gosh.
What a day! Isn't this beautiful?
- Yeah, it's gorgeous out.
- Mmm.
Oh, there's that tower.
Your father used to point to that tower
and make up all these different stories
about the people who lived inside them.
He had this really elaborate one
about a man who lived with his sister,
but when she got engaged,
the brother killed the sister,
and he buried her in the wall
so he wouldn't have to live alone.
[CHUCKLES]
Good God! What?
Well, he had a great imagination.
Yeah.
Just up there is where
you almost drowned.
What?
Uh, miss, could we get this TV
turned to the Bulls preseason game?
Also, we have a...
Groupon for the wing roulette,
so just make sure
that's half off, thanks.
What's this now?
It's the wing roulette.
Oh, you're gonna love it, Dad.
Okay, so they bring out
all these wings, right?
And some of them are barbecue,
and some of them are hot.
Some of them are medium,
some of them are mild,
some of them are teriyaki,
and some of them are Buffalo.
One of them... is ghost pepper,
and you do not want the ghost pepper.
I don't even know why
you would want to do that.
I took Brittany out here
one night for her birthday.
She got the ghost pepper.
[CHUCKLES]
She was so pissed off.
She ordered a glass
of milk for the heat.
But they don't have milk
here, so she ended up
having to chug a bunch
of non-dairy creamer.
Yeah, I haven't seen her
around the house lately.
Everything okay with her?
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Maybe.
[CHUCKLING] You should have seen her
barfing up all that
creamer, though, Dad.
This is awesome.
You know, that Brittany,
she seems like a good girl... for you.
Uh-huh. Yeah, she's great.
You know, there's something
to be said for, you know,
a good girl setting
you on the right path.
You know, I thought you two
were heading towards moving in together.
[CHUCKLES] Yeah, good one.
Brittany doesn't want
to live in the basement.
So, where are Renetta and
David going for dead dad day?
For Christ's sake, Barry,
have a little respect!
Sorry.
Oh, God! Ghost pepper!
[SCREAMS]
Yeah, karma's a bitch, jag-off.
Ghost pepper!
Hey, could I get a tall
glass of non-dairy creamer
for my idiot son?
Son of a...!
Okay. You all set?
Let's dig in.
Ah. Okay, I got napkins...
Oh.
Uh-oh. Forgot to pack silverware.
Well, that's what the toast is for.
Uh-oh.
Unless the toast has been
swallowed up by congealed gravy.
Aw.
[SIGHS]
David?
You know what, Mom, I'm not hungry.
Maybe we should just
leave it for the birds.
Oh, well.
[SIGHS]
Maybe a homeless person will come along.
Let's hope the birds get to it first.
I really thought it would travel better.
You know what?
It was probably... I
think it was the shingles.
They needed to be more toasted.
[SIGHS]
Mom, it's okay.
Hey, tell me another story about Dad.
Okay.
Oh.
This is one of my favorites.
It was early on, and
we were just dating,
and we watched "Jaws" one night.
And I got so scared of sharks.
[GASPS] My God!
Your dad thought that was so funny.
He'd say, "Renetta,
we live in Illinois."
[LAUGHS] Well, he had a point.
I know.
Yeah, but forever after that,
he would sneak up behind
me and just yell, "Shark!"
Used to scare the bejesus out of me.
Happened every time. Hmm.
You know, when he wasn't
all stressed out from...
work or trying to find work...
we had our good times.
We really did.
That's a great story.
- Shark!
- Jesus Christ, Mom!
[LAUGHS] I always wanted to try that.
[SIGHS]
Come on, we need to beat the traffic.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Oh, my God.
I got ya.
- Yeah, you got me really good.
- [CHUCKLES]
There's something in psychology
known as positive reinforcement.
I understand the nature
of you coming in here,
positive reinforcement means
for every one negative
memory that you have,
I want you to think of
three positive things.
About you?
Sure. Yeah, we can start there.
Okay, well, how about the
time when you tricked me
into closing my eyes and
running onto the Crocodile Mile,
which you didn't put water on.
I still have a scar on my thigh.
I ran all the way from the garage
onto a dry piece of plastic.
Okay, I accept that I did wrong there.
By the way, scars are
where the light is let in.
What?
In the soul.
Scars are where the light comes through.
What the hell does that mean?
It means imperfections are beautiful.
Get a life.
Okay. Do you forgive me?
No. I thought I'd be a baller
running with my eyes closed.
I thought I was gonna
do some sweet trick
at the end of the Crocodile Mile,
but I just stuck, like
a fat, dry-ass pig.
So, you just shared a negative memory.
Can you share three positive memories?
Um, okay.
I guess while my thighs were bleeding,
I was wearing a cute bathing suit.
Okay, one.
My mom let me eat a
piece of raw chicken,
'cause I always wanted to try it.
What the fuck?
Fuck.
[CHUCKLES]
My challenge to myself is to
swear less when I'm recording.
How you doing?
- Fucking not good.
- Okay.
ALL: [REPEATING] Good dream.
Wait, where are you going?
This wasn't a good dream.
I need more advice about my
life, my job... everything.
You haven't given me shit.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You're right.
You were 10 years old when I died.
I can only imagine how
vulnerable that left you,
how that shaped you.
The bond between a father and a son
is one of the core
relationships of your life.
I wanted to do more, but, you know...
Is this what you wanted?
'Cause I got news for
you. This isn't who I was.
You want some real advice?
You wake up in the morning, kid,
you put one foot in front of the other.
Putting all this pressure on yourself
isn't gonna turn you
into some kind of diamond.
PAUL: Whoa! Whoa! Boom!
That's the good stuff!
You see, that's your real
dad... He told it like it was.
...of my short life.
I'm really lucky that I can see you now.
I really feel lucky about it.
Look at this motherfucker.
He's still going.
[VOICE BREAKING] I missed
so much. I'm really sorry.
I wish it had been different.
That's enough out of you.
That was kind of fun, huh?
[CHUCKLES]
It would have been
great to have you around.
You know what?
I will give you some advice.
Yeah, really?
Shark!
♪
♪
♪
♪
Good dream. Good dream. Good dream.
"Boys of Summer" is my
favorite baseball song.
Good dream. Good dream. Good dream.
Little boy throwing a
baseball to his big daddy.
Good dream. Good dream.
Speaking of, "Big
Daddy"... great movie...
Yum, yum, gimme some "Big Daddy."
Hey, David, good dream.
♪
♪
[AIRPLANE PASSING OVERHEAD]
You're up early.
I'm actually still up.
Oh, David.
You're burning the candle at both ends.
Oh, there's no more
candle. That's long gone.
I'm just gas-lighting at this point.
But I don't think
that's what that means.
You know what tomorrow is?
I do.
I thought to remember Dad,
we'd go to his favorite spot
on the harbor, like we used to,
and have a picnic, and
I'll make Dad's favorite...
you know, shit on a shingle.
Mom, I don't think chipped
beef and gravy on toast
is very picnicky.
Besides, I don't know
if I can do it tomorrow.
I'm gonna forget you said that, David.
You be ready at noon, rain or shine.
I will, Mom.
[SIGHS]
Okay, well, tell me
more about your work.
Oh, there's this rip-off
artist who doesn't pay a cent,
and I know he has money,
but he's hiding it.
I need to lay down the law.
Well, how would you do that?
How about something like this.
No.
Oh, no.
No, don't do that.
Stop! Don't do that to his face!
No!! No!!
No!! Aah!!
Don't make it sexy!
Oh, no!
Aaaaah! Aah!
[GROANS]
So, this is a hotel room now?
Oh. Sorry.
I'm working two jobs. I'm tired.
Two jobs and still no money?
You are some piece of work.
Doctor, my ass.
I fell asleep in the waiting room.
Bernadette is delightful, by the way.
Sleep is very important to
your mental health, David.
Maybe you're working too many hours.
No, I'm definitely
working too many hours.
I'm doing sessions all day,
then I get maybe an hour
before I go to the store.
And I get home, I'm lucky to
get two more hours of sleep
if Barry decides to not
crank his house music.
Do you think this is affecting
the quality of your work?
I mean...
yes and no.
Are you falling asleep?
So, you know how I told
you about mouse trap?
Mm, I love Mouse Trap.
It's a great board game.
I have a crazy elbow...
sort of that sounds...
Excuse me? Crazy elbow?
No. We don't say crazy in here.
Um, are you... are you listening to me?
Hmm? Yeah, totally.
Okay, 'cause I don't... all right.
All right, cool.
You look like shit, you know?
Oh, yeah?
- You having a rough day?
- You could say that.
Is there anything else
hindering your sleep
other than your schedule?
No, that's pretty much it.
I mean, I've been having a
lot of weird dreams lately,
but that's probably because
I'm in and out of sleep constantly.
Can you describe one
of these dreams for me?
Sure, like the other
day, I had this dream
where I came in here,
and we were having a normal
session just like this,
and then I looked up, and you
were eating a hat sandwich.
[DISTORTED] David?
[DISTORTED] Oh, my God.
You're eating a hat sandwich.
It's delicious.
I can't believe this is happening again.
David?
You just love these hat sandwiches.
[NORMAL VOICE] David!
You were eating a hat sandwich.
You only closed your
eyes for a few seconds.
If you're dreaming the
second you close your eyes,
you're in REM rebound.
That's your brain telling you
it's severely sleep-deprived.
You really need to get some rest.
We you alive when JFK was shot?
What?
We you alive when JFK was... alive?
Stop talking, David. Lie down.
There's a blanket behind you.
Holy shit!
[CHUCKLES]
Why don't you just close your eyes?
Good night, David.
You keep that thing
gassed up for your ma?
- The snow-blower?
- No, Dad, it's electric.
They're almost all electric now.
Oh?
Fancy.
[CHUCKLES]
It's not fancy, that's run of the...
Oh.
Where are you going for dead dad day?
No. Come on. Don't be weird.
Tell me, David.
Tell me before I die again.
You can't die again.
How do you know you're not
dead and this is my dream?
[GASPS DRAMATICALLY]
[LAUGHS]
Stop. Don't do that.
We're going to the
harbor like we always do.
Okay.
[CROWD CHEERING, ORGAN PLAYING]
KASPER: Quite a game of
catch between father and son.
They moved the mound 15
times closer to home plate.
I know what this is.
This is a dead dad dream.
I feel lost, and you represent
the person I'm supposed
to get advice from.
[CHUCKLES] That's not gonna happen, kid.
Yeah, but I need help.
Yeah, well, wake up and ask Rollie.
I'm sure he's got some
real fucking chestnuts.
He's throwing baseballs
to his little boy.
Rollie's all right.
Mom really loves him.
He does a lot of little
stuff, like, you know,
eats the burned piece
of toast at breakfast.
Sounds like a real asshole.
Come on. You want Mom to be happy.
I was her first true love.
I want her to be miserable without me.
Did you know that I get up
out of my grave every day
and go looking for her?
[SCOFFS] Dad.
I'm just giving you shit.
I haven't been to my
grave since the funeral.
Did you know that "Field of Dreams"
was based on a true story?
The true story of 18 men
trapped in a corn field
because of their sins.
Len Kasper... nice touch.
Yeah. He's a great guy.
Len?
If it's not a hot dog, feel
free to put ketchup on it.
Yeah, he never talks back in the dreams.
This dream was brought
to you by Vienna Beef,
your Chicago dog since 1893.
Beef. Beef!
Beef. Beef. Beef. Beef...
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
I've been knocking for 10 minutes.
What the fuck's the matter with you?
Nice to see you, too, Kendra.
You don't look good. Are you hung over?
Did you party last
night? You look like shit.
Amanda only has two Facebook
friends with beards...
one is her dad, and the
other is Jake Arrietta.
I know she's not hooking
up with either one of them.
Okay, can I have my phone back?
So what if Amanda's
dating a guy with a beard?
Little beard, Kendra.
Doug specifically said a little beard.
Okay, you are obsessed with this.
[SIGHS] I'm not obsessed, okay?
I'm actually kind of
seeing somebody regularly.
I just want to make sure
she's not dating a freak, okay?
Okay, can we get back to my session?
Oh, yeah, that's gonna
be a bowl of laughs.
What the fuck is wrong
with you? Are you drunk?
No, I'm just working all
the time, and I don't sleep.
You're practically asleep.
I'm not recording yet,
so I can say shut up!
You just did.
[TELEPHONE LINE RINGING]
Hey, this is Rachel. Leave a message.
[BEEP]
Hey, Rachel, this is David
Tracy... Dr. David Tracy.
Uh, just wanted to check in.
Looks like you missed your appointment,
and I just wanted to make
sure everything was okay.
Hopefully, it wasn't that diner
food we had the other night.
Lord knows it went through me like a...
Anyway, just send me a text or whatever,
and we can figure out another
time for an appointment.
And, um... Yeah, that's...
That's, uh... That's
what I got on my end.
So, okay.
[GOOFY VOICE] Okaaay.
"Okaaay"? What?
Jesus, be more awkward.
Be more of an awkward person.
Can I at least talk to you about girls?
Oh, come on. We were having a good time.
So, I met this girl,
Rachel. She's great.
Then she just disappeared.
Like this?
- Dad, come on.
- [CHUCKLES]
Anyway, as I was saying,
I thought I really
connected with Rachel.
And we had this wonderful
night, and then...
I don't know what I did wrong.
Are we really gonna do this?
It's my dream. Give me what I want.
Fine. I'll tell you what you did wrong.
Rachel wanted you to swing
away, and you took a walk.
A walk is four balls.
No, it's not like that. We
have long-term potential.
You sound like a goddamn accountant.
I think this is what
people in your biz call
an un-addressed pattern of behavior.
Remember Mary Bonscarf?
My seventh-grade girlfriend?
You were a bit much, David.
You had all of eighth grade planned
before we even finished seventh.
I mean, who wants to be tied down
during the last year of junior high?
That's the year you rule the school.
Yeah, but we were a good couple.
We were 13, and you
wanted to settle down.
You can't force settling down,
which is why they call it settling.
Yeah, I got it. Thanks, Mary.
Like sand in a glass of water.
I get it. You can go now.
I don't have to go anywhere.
I got this.
[CROWD CHEERING, ORGAN PLAYS]
The batter has disappeared!
Do you really think this
is a pattern of mine?
Jesus, why are you
making yourself so stupid?
This is your dream.
Remember Amanda?
Hey, David!
We dated for four years,
and then I broke your heart!
Yeah, I remember.
I broke up with you!
I know!
Go, Cubs!
Go, Cubs.
You're really letting
yourself have it in this dream.
This is the worst
dream I've ever been in.
Yeah.
And you think your OCD is getting worse?
Maybe.
I suppose the strongest one
is keeping things parallel
to each other and to
other things in proximity.
Do you like to have
things be perpendic...
Don't do that with your hands, please.
If you like to gesture,
this is a very effective
gesture, and it's very powerful.
Great. Okay.
Does this manifest itself
in other ways in your life?
My kids can't get any sleep.
I... straighten them out
in the middle of the night.
Whoa.
Are you verbally abusive?
No. No, I literally
straighten them in their beds
so that they align
horizontally with the wall.
Mm. You know, if I were a
child, that would scare me.
It would, but they're
pretty much wide awake
because they know I'm coming.
Have you tried researching beds
that would keep them aligned?
Like a coffin?
No.
- God, no.
- That's a great idea.
It wouldn't have to be
mahogany or anything.
I have to say I am not suggesting
that your children sleep in coffins.
Like a pine-wood box.
No, that's worse. That's a crude coffin.
Wouldn't have to call it a coffin.
Call it a sleeping box.
Who doesn't want to
sleep in a sleeping box?
No one wants to sleep in a sleeping box.
♪
[P.A. BEEPS]
JULIA: Paging Dr.
David. Paging Dr. David.
We have an emergency.
The patient is presenting
with polyphasic gravi-deliquio.
Okay, I know what to do.
[JUMBLED VOICES]
Are you gonna fix him with therapy?
No. I'm a doctor.
[CHUCKLES] You're, like, half a doctor.
There's no such thing as half a doctor.
Maybe you could help if
you had a little beard.
[DISTORTED] Little beard.
It's a little beard.
[LAUGHS] Good luck with
your new career, David.
No.
[BICYCLE BELL DINGS]
Want to go for a bike ride?
Yeah, but I can't move this thing.
Fine. I guess I'll go alone.
I want to go, there's just no pedals.
- Bye, David.
- [BICYCLE BELL DINGS]
DOUG: You have to help him, Doctor!
- Who?
- The patient!
You have to hurry!
We're not going anywhere, Doug.
Neither are you, Blondie.
[GASPS]
[CELLPHONE DINGING, SHUTTER CLICKING]
[GROANS]
I was... We were frozen,
and I couldn't move, and...
What are you doing?
Don't worry, these pictures
are only going to Julia.
JULIA: What an idiot!
I thought Rachel was texting me.
- You still haven't heard from her?
- No.
Doug, report to my office...
for professional reasons.
Where I'm going, you cannot follow.
Oh, gosh.
What a day! Isn't this beautiful?
- Yeah, it's gorgeous out.
- Mmm.
Oh, there's that tower.
Your father used to point to that tower
and make up all these different stories
about the people who lived inside them.
He had this really elaborate one
about a man who lived with his sister,
but when she got engaged,
the brother killed the sister,
and he buried her in the wall
so he wouldn't have to live alone.
[CHUCKLES]
Good God! What?
Well, he had a great imagination.
Yeah.
Just up there is where
you almost drowned.
What?
Uh, miss, could we get this TV
turned to the Bulls preseason game?
Also, we have a...
Groupon for the wing roulette,
so just make sure
that's half off, thanks.
What's this now?
It's the wing roulette.
Oh, you're gonna love it, Dad.
Okay, so they bring out
all these wings, right?
And some of them are barbecue,
and some of them are hot.
Some of them are medium,
some of them are mild,
some of them are teriyaki,
and some of them are Buffalo.
One of them... is ghost pepper,
and you do not want the ghost pepper.
I don't even know why
you would want to do that.
I took Brittany out here
one night for her birthday.
She got the ghost pepper.
[CHUCKLES]
She was so pissed off.
She ordered a glass
of milk for the heat.
But they don't have milk
here, so she ended up
having to chug a bunch
of non-dairy creamer.
Yeah, I haven't seen her
around the house lately.
Everything okay with her?
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Maybe.
[CHUCKLING] You should have seen her
barfing up all that
creamer, though, Dad.
This is awesome.
You know, that Brittany,
she seems like a good girl... for you.
Uh-huh. Yeah, she's great.
You know, there's something
to be said for, you know,
a good girl setting
you on the right path.
You know, I thought you two
were heading towards moving in together.
[CHUCKLES] Yeah, good one.
Brittany doesn't want
to live in the basement.
So, where are Renetta and
David going for dead dad day?
For Christ's sake, Barry,
have a little respect!
Sorry.
Oh, God! Ghost pepper!
[SCREAMS]
Yeah, karma's a bitch, jag-off.
Ghost pepper!
Hey, could I get a tall
glass of non-dairy creamer
for my idiot son?
Son of a...!
Okay. You all set?
Let's dig in.
Ah. Okay, I got napkins...
Oh.
Uh-oh. Forgot to pack silverware.
Well, that's what the toast is for.
Uh-oh.
Unless the toast has been
swallowed up by congealed gravy.
Aw.
[SIGHS]
David?
You know what, Mom, I'm not hungry.
Maybe we should just
leave it for the birds.
Oh, well.
[SIGHS]
Maybe a homeless person will come along.
Let's hope the birds get to it first.
I really thought it would travel better.
You know what?
It was probably... I
think it was the shingles.
They needed to be more toasted.
[SIGHS]
Mom, it's okay.
Hey, tell me another story about Dad.
Okay.
Oh.
This is one of my favorites.
It was early on, and
we were just dating,
and we watched "Jaws" one night.
And I got so scared of sharks.
[GASPS] My God!
Your dad thought that was so funny.
He'd say, "Renetta,
we live in Illinois."
[LAUGHS] Well, he had a point.
I know.
Yeah, but forever after that,
he would sneak up behind
me and just yell, "Shark!"
Used to scare the bejesus out of me.
Happened every time. Hmm.
You know, when he wasn't
all stressed out from...
work or trying to find work...
we had our good times.
We really did.
That's a great story.
- Shark!
- Jesus Christ, Mom!
[LAUGHS] I always wanted to try that.
[SIGHS]
Come on, we need to beat the traffic.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Oh, my God.
I got ya.
- Yeah, you got me really good.
- [CHUCKLES]
There's something in psychology
known as positive reinforcement.
I understand the nature
of you coming in here,
positive reinforcement means
for every one negative
memory that you have,
I want you to think of
three positive things.
About you?
Sure. Yeah, we can start there.
Okay, well, how about the
time when you tricked me
into closing my eyes and
running onto the Crocodile Mile,
which you didn't put water on.
I still have a scar on my thigh.
I ran all the way from the garage
onto a dry piece of plastic.
Okay, I accept that I did wrong there.
By the way, scars are
where the light is let in.
What?
In the soul.
Scars are where the light comes through.
What the hell does that mean?
It means imperfections are beautiful.
Get a life.
Okay. Do you forgive me?
No. I thought I'd be a baller
running with my eyes closed.
I thought I was gonna
do some sweet trick
at the end of the Crocodile Mile,
but I just stuck, like
a fat, dry-ass pig.
So, you just shared a negative memory.
Can you share three positive memories?
Um, okay.
I guess while my thighs were bleeding,
I was wearing a cute bathing suit.
Okay, one.
My mom let me eat a
piece of raw chicken,
'cause I always wanted to try it.
What the fuck?
Fuck.
[CHUCKLES]
My challenge to myself is to
swear less when I'm recording.
How you doing?
- Fucking not good.
- Okay.
ALL: [REPEATING] Good dream.
Wait, where are you going?
This wasn't a good dream.
I need more advice about my
life, my job... everything.
You haven't given me shit.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You're right.
You were 10 years old when I died.
I can only imagine how
vulnerable that left you,
how that shaped you.
The bond between a father and a son
is one of the core
relationships of your life.
I wanted to do more, but, you know...
Is this what you wanted?
'Cause I got news for
you. This isn't who I was.
You want some real advice?
You wake up in the morning, kid,
you put one foot in front of the other.
Putting all this pressure on yourself
isn't gonna turn you
into some kind of diamond.
PAUL: Whoa! Whoa! Boom!
That's the good stuff!
You see, that's your real
dad... He told it like it was.
...of my short life.
I'm really lucky that I can see you now.
I really feel lucky about it.
Look at this motherfucker.
He's still going.
[VOICE BREAKING] I missed
so much. I'm really sorry.
I wish it had been different.
That's enough out of you.
That was kind of fun, huh?
[CHUCKLES]
It would have been
great to have you around.
You know what?
I will give you some advice.
Yeah, really?
Shark!
♪
♪
♪
♪
Good dream. Good dream. Good dream.
"Boys of Summer" is my
favorite baseball song.
Good dream. Good dream. Good dream.
Little boy throwing a
baseball to his big daddy.
Good dream. Good dream.
Speaking of, "Big
Daddy"... great movie...
Yum, yum, gimme some "Big Daddy."
Hey, David, good dream.