Shantaram (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 5 - The Sin in the Crime - full transcript
Do my eyes deceive? Is this a ghost?
No, it's the gora who finds all he needs
in the slum.
[chuckling] Oh!
Hey!
[Didier] Hail the returning hero.
[chuckling] Hey!
Drinks! We need drinks.
- Hi, Lin. How are you?
- How you going?
Sit down.
Hey.
Hey yourself.
[Maurizio] What did you think?
The quality was good.
We can do more business, I think.
Can you handle more weight?
- Hey, we can handle whatever you want.
- Ah.
I knew I could trust you, Lisa.
My Bombay good luck charm.
Hey, gora whores are not allowed up here.
She doesn't do that anymore.
And don't call her a whore.
You owe her an apology.
My mistake, madam.
[Maurizio chuckling]
Don't worry about that.
It's okay. It's okay, it's okay.
Thank you.
[Maurizio] Salute.
- [Didier] You know the Borsalino test?
- I don't. [Chuckles]
Well, the Borsalino is a garment of
the finest quality, believed by many to be
the most outstanding
gentleman's head covering ever made.
- You know...
- So, it's just a hat?
- [sighs]
- [Karla chuckles]
Now, the... the... the test
of a real Borsalino hat
is to roll it into a very tight tube
and pass it through a wedding ring.
If it comes out of this ordeal
without creases
and springs back into its original shape,
it is a genuine...
- Borsalino.
- Borsalino.
Ah.
Now, Bombay and your slum,
they have rolled you into a tube,
and now they're dragging you
into the wedding ring…
[Lin] Uh-huh, uh-huh.
…to see if you are the real deal or not.
Are you the real deal?
- What do you think?
- I think Didier's drunk.
[groans] Okay.
Hey, Lin.
Lisa, holy shit. You look great.
- Thanks.
- Are you...
- I'm... I'm doing good.
- Yeah?
Better than good.
I just wanted to say hi
and thank you for that first day
- and for getting me out of the Palace.
- [Didier gasps]
I don't know what I would have done
without you.
Anyway, it meant the world to me,
and I won't ever forget it, so I just…
- Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
Ah, truly a hero of the people.
- A Borsalino if I ever saw one.
- Take it easy.
- I gotta go.
- What? Come on. Sit with us.
Okay.
So you're still here, huh?
Apparently.
Did you find someone else to blame
for your problems?
Or did you take pity on him after all?
Not sure that's any of your business.
Hey, Lin has found a new life
in the Sagar Wada slum.
- I heard about that.
- [Didier] You... Mmm.
- That explains the smell.
- [Didier] Oh.
I guess when you want to feel
like a big man,
the best way is to live among midgets, no?
[clicks tongue] I don't think
you need to guess. I think you know.
'Cause every day you wake up
and you look in the mirror,
and you're scared shit less
there's someone tiny staring back.
Someone that nobody needs.
And you'd be right, mate.
Compared to you, the people I live with
are King-fucking-Kong.
- [Didier chuckles]
- [scoffs]
You should have gone
when you had the chance.
What a fucking prick.
Yeah, watch your back.
He won't forget what you just did.
I hope not.
Drinks!
Can't give everything up at once.
We need to get a record player in here.
Then we could dance.
Did you listen to records with Lin,
after he came to rescue you?
What else did you do?
What is this? Are you jealous?
Of who? Me and Lin?
I'm jealous of you and everyone.
Lin's only got eyes for Karla. Trust me.
I liked it when you defended me tonight.
"She doesn't do that anymore."
[Modena chuckles]
You know, when you said it,
it's the first time I realized it's true.
Take me to bed.
I mean... Ah, look, you can't blame them.
The whole system acts
like they don't exist.
You know, even the doctors
at the public hospitals want baksheesh.
It's fucking bullshit.
These poor people,
they just... they just come home and die,
unless I do something about it.
I got a hookup
for black market medical supplies.
Now my hut looks like a bloody pharmacy.
- [Didier, Kavita chuckle]
- I'm not joking.
Give me one more week,
I'm gonna have my own ambulance.
- Sagar Wada Ambulance Company.
- [all chuckle]
Oh, Lin, your face is a picture
of idealistic outrage so perfect
I want it... to commit it to memory.
Such a thing is so rare here,
it should be preserved.
Arre, we thought you had gone
straight to Varanasi to smoke charas.
But you are here only, saving lives
and shitting into the bay.
- It's just what I do.
- It's an incredible story. [Chuckles]
Have you ever heard anything like this?
Can't say I have.
It's a pretty amazing thing
you're doing, Lin.
Nah, I was just there, you know?
[Lin] Drunk on whiskey
and visions of my own redemption,
I'd forgotten what I really was.
A fugitive who needed to stay invisible.
[villagers clamoring] Linbaba! Linbaba!
[pans clanging]
[villager] Dr. Lin!
[Prabhu] Good morning!
[villager 2] Come out, Linbaba!
[Prabhu speaking Hindi]
Good morning! Good morning!
[villager 2] Come out, Linbaba!
[Prabhu] Come out, Linbaba!
[in English] Okay! Okay, I'm coming.
[Qasim speaks Hindi]
[cheering]
[in English]
Oh, Linbaba, you are awake, finally.
Very good, very good.
Today is ration day. Take.
Linbaba, take, take.
[chuckles] Oh, man...
As citizens, Mr. Lin, us bastiwale,
we still have some rights.
The right to vote, the right to rations,
and, of course, the right to pay taxes.
- [scoffs]
- [villagers chuckle]
But, Linbaba, you are true not-person,
so you are not getting any of this, huh?
But we do not want any charity.
You're one of us now.
And then when we collect our rations,
so will the doctor, huh?
[chuckles]
Thank you, thank you.
[speaks Hindi, chuckles]
- Arre, give more.
- [speaks Hindi]
- Oh, no, no. No. [Chuckles]
- You can take, na?
You can take anything else you want.
- Thank you.
- Potatoes, rice.
- [Qasim] We'll send a cup of tea for you.
- [Prabhu speaking Hindi]
[speaks Hindi]
Lin's an outsider. Saving lives.
I think it could be a really good story.
I think you should pitch it
to your editor.
So what's the headline?
"Gora tourist arrives with Band-Aids"?
Headline is,
"Shut up, Nishant, and get serious,
- or I'll take this story somewhere else."
- Touchy. Okay, sorry. [Scoffs]
He works for free
and gets absolutely no support
from the medical community.
He's shaming a system
that deserves shaming.
You're pitching this gora slum doctor
as a feature?
Yes. Something that gets attention
and causes some change.
I'm sick of smiling and flirting
for puff-piece profiles on movie stars.
- They're good business, yaar.
- They're not journalism, yaar.
- Not what I want to do.
- So ambitious.
Is that a problem?
Am I getting ideas
above my station, Nishant?
Should I be busy having babies
instead maybe?
Yes.
What? I should be having b...
Yes, it could appeal to my editor.
I'll talk to him.
[sighs]
But it will be strictly a freelance.
So to be clear,
I'm not offering you a job at the paper.
Mm-hmm.
I would not be your boss.
And by your rules,
we still could have dinner.
Oh.
And what if I say no?
I'll still bring him the story,
but let the record show
that I think having something in common,
like a profession,
should be a prima facie incentive
for dating, not a deterrent.
Fine. [Sighs] Dinner.
Evening of my convenience.
Is tomorrow night convenient?
- [guests chattering]
- [instrumental music playing]
Would you like a drink?
[no audible dialogue]
Excuse me.
Minister Pandey.
My congratulations.
[Pandey] Thank you, madam.
I wanted to introduce myself.
Abdel Khader Khan.
A pleasure. Of course.
Minister Pandey, your predecessor was a...
Was a great loss to me. A great loss.
A tragedy.
I had been a patron
of his political career for many years
because I was certain
of his desire to do the right thing
by the people of Colaba.
To act in the best interests of the many,
not the few.
[stammers] Of course.
We serve at the pleasure of the people.
And the pleasure of the people
can change on a whim.
[chuckles]
The perils of being a politician.
You only wield as much power
as the people give you.
And what they give you,
they can take away.
Yes, put your faith in the slum.
Thank you for coming.
[stammers]
I was keen to meet you face-to-face.
Until next time.
He is bought and sold.
I expected Miss Karla
to have delivered that message.
She did. But I wanted to deliver
the minister a different message.
And so you threaten him with what?
The votes of Sagar Wada?
You think you can win the will
of the people with your pet doctor?
I expected more from you, Khaderbhai.
Ah, this is India, where Dharma is king.
And you and I both know
the people of Sagar Wada will be given
a say in their own fate.
Delivering votes means nothing
if I own the office that counts them.
[speaks Farsi]
[Prabhu, in English]
A friend is asking for you.
No one knows why.
I don't like it.
- [Abdullah] That's right, brother.
- [crowd exclaims]
Direct from the factory.
None of this hand-me-down shit.
What are you talking about?
She's for you.
[villager, in Hindi]
He bought it for Dr. Lin!
[villager 2] He's Khader's man.
Mate, I can't take this.
[villager 3] A goonda.
Are we not brothers?
Have we not saved each other's lives?
- Can you not ride?
- [chuckling]
I can ride.
I'm beginning to think
it's because you're scared.
Even the kid can tell.
Hey, what do you think, boy? Is he scared?
- Yes.
- [both chuckle]
[Abdullah] You must take this bike, Lin.
I have better things to do with my time
than be your medicine delivery boy.
You see? Accepting is your gift to me.
What do you think, Ravi?
[engine revs]
[speaks Hindi]
[Abdullah, in English] Test drive?
[Lin] You wanna come, Ravi?
[Abdullah speaks Hindi]
[in English]
You haven't said a word since we left.
Why do you want Walid to think
Lin Ford is part of your plan?
Well, when you pick a man's pocket,
it's important to have a distraction.
Was that your plan for him all along?
Who am I that I could manipulate
fate and consequence so thoroughly? God?
No. Lin is in Sagar Wada
for his own reasons.
Our agreement
is purely the business of medicine.
Lin would not be there if not for us,
what I made him do.
Zhou sent a killer into Sagar Wada
after him, and they started the fire.
Someone died. Lin blames himself for that.
He shared all this with you?
Not a casual conversation
with a man you care nothing for.
What else did you speak about?
Nothing important.
You went to Lin to see if he would
tell you more about his time with me
than I did.
Mm-hmm.
- Did he?
- No.
[chuckles]
Do you want for us to tell him the truth
about how we are all connected?
It's already too late for that.
I just don't want
anybody else getting hurt.
I am happy to agree
that neither of us will interfere
with Lin's path any further, if you are.
If he chooses to stay in Sagar Wada,
so what?
Otherwise, we both stay away.
[vendor shouting]
["Reggae Makossa" playing in café]
I don't think that fellow over there
likes you very much.
Or he likes you too much.
Yeah, he's a prick.
And this boy, Ravi,
I'm very sure he also doesn't like you.
Is that why you do all this doctoring
in the slum? So people will like you?
A little goes a long way
to making people happy there.
Hmm. What will make you happy, Lin?
That's a long list.
[chuckles]
If I could actually work out Karla,
that would be something.
Karla?
The woman who came up to us
at the club the other night.
Mmm. What's your story with her?
You tell me, mate.
That woman is a mystery tied in a riddle,
wrapped in an enigma.
[Abdullah chuckles]
She pushes me away, then pulls me close.
Ignores me, then tells me,
"Don't be a stranger."
What am I supposed to do with that?
I would say don't be a stranger.
[chuckles]
- Simple? Just that simple?
- Mmm. Just like that.
Nice.
Maurizio, mate,
how did it go at the VD clinic?
Did you get everything cleared up?
Antibiotics are a wonderful thing.
- [Abdullah, Lin laughing]
- [speaks Italian]
[chuckling] Strange to me
why anyone could dislike you.
Relax.
They can't do anything in here.
That's why they're being so brave.
It's Rafiq, right?
Listen, about the other day,
I can see why you might be
pissed off about that,
how you might want
a little bit of payback or whatever.
But, look, I'm Switzerland.
I'm just a fella that couldn't let
two other fellas kill each other
in broad daylight.
That's all. No hard feelings, yeah?
[chuckles]
I saved your life.
If I wasn't there, you wouldn't be here.
No, he wouldn't.
You should leave Bombay
before something bad happens.
Yeah, so people keep telling me.
Listen, I'm serious.
I don't want any trouble with you.
Too late. You chose a side, doctor man.
[chuckles]
The wrong one.
All right.
We're leaving.
But I don't want to go.
Unless you wanna walk home, move.
Are you staying?
You know me. I want seconds.
Be careful.
[sighs]
Hey, how you going, Jitendra, Ratna?
[Qasim] Ravi?
- [in Marathi] Did you finish your chores?
- What chores?
Ravi, now.
Yes, sir. I'm going. [Sucks teeth]
[in English] Can we speak?
Sure. Sure, come in.
You wanna sit down?
Oh, no, uh...
I just took up this collection.
What for? You already gave me too much.
No, Mr. Lin. That is our payment
for the work you do.
This, uh... This money,
this is for the supplies you must buy.
Okay.
Look, Mr. Lin,
where you get your medicine from
is your business.
But the people here,
we need to pay our own way.
I see you talking to Khader's man.
I hear him call you "brother."
That is not the kind of brother you need.
Brotherhood is right here,
in the jhopadpatti.
And there will be conflict
in having two brothers.
We do not have much here,
but we also owe nothing.
And that is our strength.
The cost of your medicines
should be our burden, Mr. Lin,
so it doesn't become our debt
to you or... or anyone else. Hmm?
Okay.
Salaam alaikum.
Alaikumu assalam.
[Qasim speaking Hindi]
[Lin, in English] I knew he was right
and that if I wanted to stay
in this place,
it had to be by their rules.
I fund this school.
None of the children here have parents.
[children chattering]
I cannot deny how I make my money,
but does that matter
as much as what I do with it?
The courts and the police would say yeah.
Now, that is because our laws concentrate
on how much crime is in the sin.
For me, the important thing is
how much sin is in the crime.
I do not make money
from prostitution, drugs.
I do not traffic children, women.
All the other councils, they do,
and that puts me at a disadvantage.
So instead of investing in sin,
I must invest in people,
help them grow and maybe, at some point,
I will reap the benefits.
So I'm one of these seeds you planted.
Are you getting the benefit you hoped for?
[sighs]
It makes me sad
that this is where we are, you and I.
You are very different.
I think you know this.
I have no children, but in this world,
you are a daughter to me,
if you choose to be,
although I will never pretend to be
the kind of father a daughter needs.
You've given me
more than my own father did.
[Khaderbhai] I'm so sorry.
When I first met Rujul,
he wanted to make Bombay a better place.
But power and money changed him.
I didn't see it
until you brought it to me.
But now I worry
that you regret doing that.
I feel like I'm in over my head.
I have no control. I don't like it.
That's why you must always ask yourself
how much sin is in the crime for you,
no one else.
And if it becomes too much
for your soul to bear,
then you must walk away.
You, me, Abdullah, even Lin Ford,
are driven by
a death we would change if we could.
And that starting point
is burned into our hearts
and cannot be reasoned away.
Then our paths are set.
We can't change it...
No, no, no. We can. We must.
[sighs] I love you, Karla,
whether it is my right or not.
So I will say it again.
If you want to choose a different path,
it will not affect our relationship.
Help me with this.
[Parvati] I will cover
the parts you have looked at.
[Lin] She'll have to stay here tonight
until this IV is finished.
[Parvati] She would not want this.
Not alone with you.
[Lin] I know.
That's why
you're gonna have to stay with her.
I'll go to Prabhu.
You're good at this, Parvati.
I think I would like to do this
as a real job.
Yeah, they always need good people.
You should pursue it.
Not easy for a girl from here.
[shutter clicks]
- [laughs]
- [shutter clicking]
Kavita, what are you doing here?
Everything you were talking about
the other night got me thinking
about how I could help.
Help with what?
Your medical work here,
the fight you're taking on.
What you're doing
will get a lot of attention.
The fact you have to do it
because no one else wants to.
Lin, I think what you're doing is amazing,
but real change needs political will.
The easiest way to get that
is by putting you on the front page.
No. No way.
- Fuck that.
- Ah.
I can't, Kavita. I'm sorry.
W... How about I talk
to some of the patients, you know?
Get some pictures of you at work.
- H-Hey! [Scoffs]
- There is no story, all right?
You're gonna ruin everything.
What the fuck, man?
[stammers]
Am I clear?
Be clearer if you told me why.
Why don't you want this story told?
It's nothing. Really. I'm...
I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that.
If there's any...
If there's any damage, I'll pay...
[chuckles] Don't worry about it.
No, Kavita.
Kavita.
[Lin] My heart was pounding
as I realized how fragile my freedom was.
Just one photograph out in the world
could send me straight back to prison.
[Prabhu puffs]
Parvati.
Pa… [chuckles]
[singsongy] Parvati, oh, Parvati,
oh, meri Parvati.
- Hey. [Sighs]
- [vocalizes]
[Prabhu coughs]
Please do not ruin my happy thoughts, huh?
Your face is very… [stammers]
Children will cry
if they look at this face.
[sighs]
It's been a bit of a day, Prabhu, mate.
Seems I can't get things right
for getting them wrong.
[speaks Hindi]
[sighs]
[in English] I love her too much, Linbaba.
- [chuckles]
- You're making me jealous.
Yeah, well, I am jealous of that big, fat
envelope of money Qasimbhai is giving you.
I'm sick about it.
Okay. Then, uh, to feel better about it,
why don't you, you know, roll around
on your big bed of money, Linbaba?
Prabhu, the whole jhopadpatti
has been chipping in
'cause they think I'm spending my money
on the medicine.
If not you, then who?
Khaderbhai's been paying.
Okay, very bad. Very bad, very...
Lin... Lin, you must never tell anyone,
or Qasimbhai will tell you
to leave Sagar Wada.
Look, that money should go
back to the people.
No.
That will only get you in more trouble.
The people love you, they need you,
they want you to have it. Please, Linbaba.
Just keep your head down
and money in your pocket, boss.
- It's a lie.
- Not a lie. Just a…
[both, chuckling] Not telling.
With consequences you must deal with.
And the consequences are
everyone stays happy,
and you must live with too much money.
[Lin grunts, sighs]
Why don't you take some of that food
to Parvati…
- [chuckles]
- …and say hello?
Please, Lin. Her family do not need
any more reason to hate me.
An unmarried woman
cannot be talking to a...
Mmm, handsome, unmarried fellow like me,
alone in the beautiful dark of the night.
Huh?
Same reason you are sleeping here tonight.
So many rules.
Can't be alone with another man's wife
or with a woman who's nobody's wife
or with any woman, pretty much.
I'm surprised
there are so many kids around here.
Ah. [Chuckles]
I'm not saying spend the night.
Just go say hello.
It is not possible, Linbaba.
Parvati is alone, and I cannot be with her
even though I desire her very much.
Instead, I'm sharing my tiny hut with you.
But Karla Ma'am is alone,
and there are no rules stopping you.
And you are jealous of me?
I am the one
who cannot have sexy time tonight
because of this situation.
Now I'm confused.
Are you telling me to go get laid
or do you wanna be alone to masturbate?
All friends here, Linbaba.
I don't mind if I'm alone or not.
[chuckles]
Then I definitely have
somewhere else to be.
[guard] Lin Ford at the gate, sir.
[in Hindi] You should leave.
[in English] Don't let Lin see you.
We'll finish this later.
- Khaderbhai.
- [chuckles]
- Do you play?
- Uh, no, I have no idea what that is.
[chuckles] Pachisi. I will teach you.
Uh, some other time maybe.
Look, everything you've done
has been appreciated, Khaderbhai,
but I'm gonna have to insist on
paying you back.
Paying my own way from now on.
Did someone send you here to tell me this?
No. No, they didn't need to.
Sagar Wada has its own rules,
and if I'm gonna live there,
they have to be my rules too.
What rule do they have
except to grovel and wallow in shit?
[scoffs]
Their only rule is
that they're happy to suffer.
There's more than one kind of suffering,
Abdullah.
The one we feel
and the one we cause others to feel.
You don't have to suffer anything
if you're strong enough to deny it.
Well, maybe true strength is suffering
for others when you don't have to.
Mr. Lin came here to make his life harder.
Do you think him weak?
No. But though I count him as a brother,
he's a crazy Westerner,
and the rules don't count for him.
A suffering can be a kind of anger.
We rage against injustice and unfairness,
and some men feel compelled
to bear this suffering
no matter the consequences.
Such a man is only truly happy
when he is suffering for others.
The hero's curse.
You've done it now.
This discussion will last a long time.
Better you take the money and go.
I'm afraid I can't do that.
And I respect your decision.
My interest is only in being a help to you
in Sagar Wada.
And if I can ever be a help to you again,
my door is always open.
- Thank you, Khaderbhai.
- I enjoy our conversations, Lin.
I hope we can maintain
our friendship at least.
Nothing I'd like more.
[Khaderbhai] Good.
[janitor] My saab will be coming soon.
Lindsay.
[Lin] Did you know that
it's practically illegal in the Sagar Wada
for a man to be alone with
an unmarried woman in the dead of night?
[chuckles]
What are you doing here?
I missed you.
Why did you let me in?
[Nandita, Parvati speaking Hindi]
[in Marathi] Come inside.
[speaks Marathi]
Let's go. I've come to take you home.
[Parvati clicks tongue]
[in Hindi] I can't leave her tonight.
This is not your job.
The shop is your business.
There is only one road
out of our difficulties, Parvati!
Parvati.
Everything you're doing for the clinic…
Is at the expense
of your own flesh and blood.
I don't do this for the clinic.
I do this for me.
[sighs]
[in English]
I'm getting the Lewis Carrolls.
[Lin, imitating the Mad Hatter]
"Oh, you're mad. Bonkers.
Completely off your head.
But I'll tell you a secret.
All the best people are."
Ah, very good, Lin. Too smart by half.
[sighs]
Is you being here going to make
one of those pretty slum girls jealous?
[normal voice] What?
[clicks tongue] No.
[chuckles]
I should stop listening to Didier.
Thinks the only reason
you would stay in a slum is sex.
What, not even love? Just sex?
I hate love.
[chuckling]
You c... You can't hate love, Karla.
Why not?
It's such an arrogance to love someone
and to expect it in return.
I think heaven is a place
where everybody is happy
because nobody has to love
anyone else ever again.
So if love's no good…
What is?
Power. It's the opposite of love.
- You're a fucking savage.
- [both chuckling]
So, why are you here in Bombay
in the first place?
The original sin.
I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
Then don't tell me.
Maybe I wanna tell you.
Maybe I wanna tell someone the truth.
Someone I trust.
Someone I think could be a friend.
Are we friends?
I let you in, against my better judgment.
[Lin groans] Okay.
[both chuckling]
I was addicted to heroin.
I needed money, so I robbed a bank.
A cop got killed,
not by me, but I played my part.
And they put me away.
And then I escaped…
And ran as fast
and as hard as I could to here.
Why here?
I always wanted to come.
It's what the money
was supposed to be for.
So I convinced myself I could come anyway.
Leave all the rest behind.
Take that information
to any cop in Bombay.
There's probably a reward in it.
[chuckles]
So now we have to be friends.
My life is in your hands.
["Love and Affection" playing]
- [both chuckle]
- [phone rings]
[Nishant] Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm.
- Don't. Don't. D...
- Mm-hmm. [Chuckles]
[clerk]
Is this St. Hilda's Hospital, Bombay?
This is St. Hilda's.
- Is this Usha?
- Yes.
It's Susan Reeves
from the passport office in Auckland.
I ran the passport number.
You're sure you gave me the right one?
Uh, R 22624-788. Lindsay Ford.
He's still in a coma,
and it doesn't look good.
The least we can do is find his family
and tell them he's not coming home.
I'm sure they know, love.
Lindsay Ford's been dead for six years.
If you don't mind holding a minute,
my supervisor would like a word.
Of course.
He's using a dead man's passport.
["Midnight Lullaby" playing]
When I was 12, my father shot himself.
I found him.
Brains all over
a pile of bankruptcy forms.
I grew up rich, certain of two things.
I wanted for nothing,
and my father loved me more than anything.
Turned out I was wrong on both counts.
And during everything that came after,
the thing I could never get past
was why wasn't I enough
for him to live for?
I was complacent in my love for him
and in my assumption
that he loved me most.
He didn't.
He loved who and what he was
and what people thought of him.
I used to cry myself to sleep
at whatever relative's house
I'd been shunted to,
and ask why he couldn't have
just stayed for me…
He couldn't have just loved me
and that be enough?
That wasn't your fault.
[sighs] I know that.
Guilt's your thing, not mine.
I blamed him for throwing my love away.
And blame's harder than guilt.
And also easier.
If you assume the worst of everyone,
it's easy not to get close.
You asked what I want.
I never wanna be dependent
on anybody else again.
That's it.
[chuckles]
Sounds lonely.
"They fuck you up, your mom and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do."
[chuckles]
"They fill you with the faults they had."
[both] "And add some extra, just for you."
[chuckles]
You know, last time
I was out after curfew with you…
I got chased by the cops.
Then I guess you better stay,
if you'd like.
I can't.
You could.
It's not that simple.
[Lin sighs]
The couch is all yours.
[sighs]
No, it's the gora who finds all he needs
in the slum.
[chuckling] Oh!
Hey!
[Didier] Hail the returning hero.
[chuckling] Hey!
Drinks! We need drinks.
- Hi, Lin. How are you?
- How you going?
Sit down.
Hey.
Hey yourself.
[Maurizio] What did you think?
The quality was good.
We can do more business, I think.
Can you handle more weight?
- Hey, we can handle whatever you want.
- Ah.
I knew I could trust you, Lisa.
My Bombay good luck charm.
Hey, gora whores are not allowed up here.
She doesn't do that anymore.
And don't call her a whore.
You owe her an apology.
My mistake, madam.
[Maurizio chuckling]
Don't worry about that.
It's okay. It's okay, it's okay.
Thank you.
[Maurizio] Salute.
- [Didier] You know the Borsalino test?
- I don't. [Chuckles]
Well, the Borsalino is a garment of
the finest quality, believed by many to be
the most outstanding
gentleman's head covering ever made.
- You know...
- So, it's just a hat?
- [sighs]
- [Karla chuckles]
Now, the... the... the test
of a real Borsalino hat
is to roll it into a very tight tube
and pass it through a wedding ring.
If it comes out of this ordeal
without creases
and springs back into its original shape,
it is a genuine...
- Borsalino.
- Borsalino.
Ah.
Now, Bombay and your slum,
they have rolled you into a tube,
and now they're dragging you
into the wedding ring…
[Lin] Uh-huh, uh-huh.
…to see if you are the real deal or not.
Are you the real deal?
- What do you think?
- I think Didier's drunk.
[groans] Okay.
Hey, Lin.
Lisa, holy shit. You look great.
- Thanks.
- Are you...
- I'm... I'm doing good.
- Yeah?
Better than good.
I just wanted to say hi
and thank you for that first day
- and for getting me out of the Palace.
- [Didier gasps]
I don't know what I would have done
without you.
Anyway, it meant the world to me,
and I won't ever forget it, so I just…
- Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
Ah, truly a hero of the people.
- A Borsalino if I ever saw one.
- Take it easy.
- I gotta go.
- What? Come on. Sit with us.
Okay.
So you're still here, huh?
Apparently.
Did you find someone else to blame
for your problems?
Or did you take pity on him after all?
Not sure that's any of your business.
Hey, Lin has found a new life
in the Sagar Wada slum.
- I heard about that.
- [Didier] You... Mmm.
- That explains the smell.
- [Didier] Oh.
I guess when you want to feel
like a big man,
the best way is to live among midgets, no?
[clicks tongue] I don't think
you need to guess. I think you know.
'Cause every day you wake up
and you look in the mirror,
and you're scared shit less
there's someone tiny staring back.
Someone that nobody needs.
And you'd be right, mate.
Compared to you, the people I live with
are King-fucking-Kong.
- [Didier chuckles]
- [scoffs]
You should have gone
when you had the chance.
What a fucking prick.
Yeah, watch your back.
He won't forget what you just did.
I hope not.
Drinks!
Can't give everything up at once.
We need to get a record player in here.
Then we could dance.
Did you listen to records with Lin,
after he came to rescue you?
What else did you do?
What is this? Are you jealous?
Of who? Me and Lin?
I'm jealous of you and everyone.
Lin's only got eyes for Karla. Trust me.
I liked it when you defended me tonight.
"She doesn't do that anymore."
[Modena chuckles]
You know, when you said it,
it's the first time I realized it's true.
Take me to bed.
I mean... Ah, look, you can't blame them.
The whole system acts
like they don't exist.
You know, even the doctors
at the public hospitals want baksheesh.
It's fucking bullshit.
These poor people,
they just... they just come home and die,
unless I do something about it.
I got a hookup
for black market medical supplies.
Now my hut looks like a bloody pharmacy.
- [Didier, Kavita chuckle]
- I'm not joking.
Give me one more week,
I'm gonna have my own ambulance.
- Sagar Wada Ambulance Company.
- [all chuckle]
Oh, Lin, your face is a picture
of idealistic outrage so perfect
I want it... to commit it to memory.
Such a thing is so rare here,
it should be preserved.
Arre, we thought you had gone
straight to Varanasi to smoke charas.
But you are here only, saving lives
and shitting into the bay.
- It's just what I do.
- It's an incredible story. [Chuckles]
Have you ever heard anything like this?
Can't say I have.
It's a pretty amazing thing
you're doing, Lin.
Nah, I was just there, you know?
[Lin] Drunk on whiskey
and visions of my own redemption,
I'd forgotten what I really was.
A fugitive who needed to stay invisible.
[villagers clamoring] Linbaba! Linbaba!
[pans clanging]
[villager] Dr. Lin!
[Prabhu] Good morning!
[villager 2] Come out, Linbaba!
[Prabhu speaking Hindi]
Good morning! Good morning!
[villager 2] Come out, Linbaba!
[Prabhu] Come out, Linbaba!
[in English] Okay! Okay, I'm coming.
[Qasim speaks Hindi]
[cheering]
[in English]
Oh, Linbaba, you are awake, finally.
Very good, very good.
Today is ration day. Take.
Linbaba, take, take.
[chuckles] Oh, man...
As citizens, Mr. Lin, us bastiwale,
we still have some rights.
The right to vote, the right to rations,
and, of course, the right to pay taxes.
- [scoffs]
- [villagers chuckle]
But, Linbaba, you are true not-person,
so you are not getting any of this, huh?
But we do not want any charity.
You're one of us now.
And then when we collect our rations,
so will the doctor, huh?
[chuckles]
Thank you, thank you.
[speaks Hindi, chuckles]
- Arre, give more.
- [speaks Hindi]
- Oh, no, no. No. [Chuckles]
- You can take, na?
You can take anything else you want.
- Thank you.
- Potatoes, rice.
- [Qasim] We'll send a cup of tea for you.
- [Prabhu speaking Hindi]
[speaks Hindi]
Lin's an outsider. Saving lives.
I think it could be a really good story.
I think you should pitch it
to your editor.
So what's the headline?
"Gora tourist arrives with Band-Aids"?
Headline is,
"Shut up, Nishant, and get serious,
- or I'll take this story somewhere else."
- Touchy. Okay, sorry. [Scoffs]
He works for free
and gets absolutely no support
from the medical community.
He's shaming a system
that deserves shaming.
You're pitching this gora slum doctor
as a feature?
Yes. Something that gets attention
and causes some change.
I'm sick of smiling and flirting
for puff-piece profiles on movie stars.
- They're good business, yaar.
- They're not journalism, yaar.
- Not what I want to do.
- So ambitious.
Is that a problem?
Am I getting ideas
above my station, Nishant?
Should I be busy having babies
instead maybe?
Yes.
What? I should be having b...
Yes, it could appeal to my editor.
I'll talk to him.
[sighs]
But it will be strictly a freelance.
So to be clear,
I'm not offering you a job at the paper.
Mm-hmm.
I would not be your boss.
And by your rules,
we still could have dinner.
Oh.
And what if I say no?
I'll still bring him the story,
but let the record show
that I think having something in common,
like a profession,
should be a prima facie incentive
for dating, not a deterrent.
Fine. [Sighs] Dinner.
Evening of my convenience.
Is tomorrow night convenient?
- [guests chattering]
- [instrumental music playing]
Would you like a drink?
[no audible dialogue]
Excuse me.
Minister Pandey.
My congratulations.
[Pandey] Thank you, madam.
I wanted to introduce myself.
Abdel Khader Khan.
A pleasure. Of course.
Minister Pandey, your predecessor was a...
Was a great loss to me. A great loss.
A tragedy.
I had been a patron
of his political career for many years
because I was certain
of his desire to do the right thing
by the people of Colaba.
To act in the best interests of the many,
not the few.
[stammers] Of course.
We serve at the pleasure of the people.
And the pleasure of the people
can change on a whim.
[chuckles]
The perils of being a politician.
You only wield as much power
as the people give you.
And what they give you,
they can take away.
Yes, put your faith in the slum.
Thank you for coming.
[stammers]
I was keen to meet you face-to-face.
Until next time.
He is bought and sold.
I expected Miss Karla
to have delivered that message.
She did. But I wanted to deliver
the minister a different message.
And so you threaten him with what?
The votes of Sagar Wada?
You think you can win the will
of the people with your pet doctor?
I expected more from you, Khaderbhai.
Ah, this is India, where Dharma is king.
And you and I both know
the people of Sagar Wada will be given
a say in their own fate.
Delivering votes means nothing
if I own the office that counts them.
[speaks Farsi]
[Prabhu, in English]
A friend is asking for you.
No one knows why.
I don't like it.
- [Abdullah] That's right, brother.
- [crowd exclaims]
Direct from the factory.
None of this hand-me-down shit.
What are you talking about?
She's for you.
[villager, in Hindi]
He bought it for Dr. Lin!
[villager 2] He's Khader's man.
Mate, I can't take this.
[villager 3] A goonda.
Are we not brothers?
Have we not saved each other's lives?
- Can you not ride?
- [chuckling]
I can ride.
I'm beginning to think
it's because you're scared.
Even the kid can tell.
Hey, what do you think, boy? Is he scared?
- Yes.
- [both chuckle]
[Abdullah] You must take this bike, Lin.
I have better things to do with my time
than be your medicine delivery boy.
You see? Accepting is your gift to me.
What do you think, Ravi?
[engine revs]
[speaks Hindi]
[Abdullah, in English] Test drive?
[Lin] You wanna come, Ravi?
[Abdullah speaks Hindi]
[in English]
You haven't said a word since we left.
Why do you want Walid to think
Lin Ford is part of your plan?
Well, when you pick a man's pocket,
it's important to have a distraction.
Was that your plan for him all along?
Who am I that I could manipulate
fate and consequence so thoroughly? God?
No. Lin is in Sagar Wada
for his own reasons.
Our agreement
is purely the business of medicine.
Lin would not be there if not for us,
what I made him do.
Zhou sent a killer into Sagar Wada
after him, and they started the fire.
Someone died. Lin blames himself for that.
He shared all this with you?
Not a casual conversation
with a man you care nothing for.
What else did you speak about?
Nothing important.
You went to Lin to see if he would
tell you more about his time with me
than I did.
Mm-hmm.
- Did he?
- No.
[chuckles]
Do you want for us to tell him the truth
about how we are all connected?
It's already too late for that.
I just don't want
anybody else getting hurt.
I am happy to agree
that neither of us will interfere
with Lin's path any further, if you are.
If he chooses to stay in Sagar Wada,
so what?
Otherwise, we both stay away.
[vendor shouting]
["Reggae Makossa" playing in café]
I don't think that fellow over there
likes you very much.
Or he likes you too much.
Yeah, he's a prick.
And this boy, Ravi,
I'm very sure he also doesn't like you.
Is that why you do all this doctoring
in the slum? So people will like you?
A little goes a long way
to making people happy there.
Hmm. What will make you happy, Lin?
That's a long list.
[chuckles]
If I could actually work out Karla,
that would be something.
Karla?
The woman who came up to us
at the club the other night.
Mmm. What's your story with her?
You tell me, mate.
That woman is a mystery tied in a riddle,
wrapped in an enigma.
[Abdullah chuckles]
She pushes me away, then pulls me close.
Ignores me, then tells me,
"Don't be a stranger."
What am I supposed to do with that?
I would say don't be a stranger.
[chuckles]
- Simple? Just that simple?
- Mmm. Just like that.
Nice.
Maurizio, mate,
how did it go at the VD clinic?
Did you get everything cleared up?
Antibiotics are a wonderful thing.
- [Abdullah, Lin laughing]
- [speaks Italian]
[chuckling] Strange to me
why anyone could dislike you.
Relax.
They can't do anything in here.
That's why they're being so brave.
It's Rafiq, right?
Listen, about the other day,
I can see why you might be
pissed off about that,
how you might want
a little bit of payback or whatever.
But, look, I'm Switzerland.
I'm just a fella that couldn't let
two other fellas kill each other
in broad daylight.
That's all. No hard feelings, yeah?
[chuckles]
I saved your life.
If I wasn't there, you wouldn't be here.
No, he wouldn't.
You should leave Bombay
before something bad happens.
Yeah, so people keep telling me.
Listen, I'm serious.
I don't want any trouble with you.
Too late. You chose a side, doctor man.
[chuckles]
The wrong one.
All right.
We're leaving.
But I don't want to go.
Unless you wanna walk home, move.
Are you staying?
You know me. I want seconds.
Be careful.
[sighs]
Hey, how you going, Jitendra, Ratna?
[Qasim] Ravi?
- [in Marathi] Did you finish your chores?
- What chores?
Ravi, now.
Yes, sir. I'm going. [Sucks teeth]
[in English] Can we speak?
Sure. Sure, come in.
You wanna sit down?
Oh, no, uh...
I just took up this collection.
What for? You already gave me too much.
No, Mr. Lin. That is our payment
for the work you do.
This, uh... This money,
this is for the supplies you must buy.
Okay.
Look, Mr. Lin,
where you get your medicine from
is your business.
But the people here,
we need to pay our own way.
I see you talking to Khader's man.
I hear him call you "brother."
That is not the kind of brother you need.
Brotherhood is right here,
in the jhopadpatti.
And there will be conflict
in having two brothers.
We do not have much here,
but we also owe nothing.
And that is our strength.
The cost of your medicines
should be our burden, Mr. Lin,
so it doesn't become our debt
to you or... or anyone else. Hmm?
Okay.
Salaam alaikum.
Alaikumu assalam.
[Qasim speaking Hindi]
[Lin, in English] I knew he was right
and that if I wanted to stay
in this place,
it had to be by their rules.
I fund this school.
None of the children here have parents.
[children chattering]
I cannot deny how I make my money,
but does that matter
as much as what I do with it?
The courts and the police would say yeah.
Now, that is because our laws concentrate
on how much crime is in the sin.
For me, the important thing is
how much sin is in the crime.
I do not make money
from prostitution, drugs.
I do not traffic children, women.
All the other councils, they do,
and that puts me at a disadvantage.
So instead of investing in sin,
I must invest in people,
help them grow and maybe, at some point,
I will reap the benefits.
So I'm one of these seeds you planted.
Are you getting the benefit you hoped for?
[sighs]
It makes me sad
that this is where we are, you and I.
You are very different.
I think you know this.
I have no children, but in this world,
you are a daughter to me,
if you choose to be,
although I will never pretend to be
the kind of father a daughter needs.
You've given me
more than my own father did.
[Khaderbhai] I'm so sorry.
When I first met Rujul,
he wanted to make Bombay a better place.
But power and money changed him.
I didn't see it
until you brought it to me.
But now I worry
that you regret doing that.
I feel like I'm in over my head.
I have no control. I don't like it.
That's why you must always ask yourself
how much sin is in the crime for you,
no one else.
And if it becomes too much
for your soul to bear,
then you must walk away.
You, me, Abdullah, even Lin Ford,
are driven by
a death we would change if we could.
And that starting point
is burned into our hearts
and cannot be reasoned away.
Then our paths are set.
We can't change it...
No, no, no. We can. We must.
[sighs] I love you, Karla,
whether it is my right or not.
So I will say it again.
If you want to choose a different path,
it will not affect our relationship.
Help me with this.
[Parvati] I will cover
the parts you have looked at.
[Lin] She'll have to stay here tonight
until this IV is finished.
[Parvati] She would not want this.
Not alone with you.
[Lin] I know.
That's why
you're gonna have to stay with her.
I'll go to Prabhu.
You're good at this, Parvati.
I think I would like to do this
as a real job.
Yeah, they always need good people.
You should pursue it.
Not easy for a girl from here.
[shutter clicks]
- [laughs]
- [shutter clicking]
Kavita, what are you doing here?
Everything you were talking about
the other night got me thinking
about how I could help.
Help with what?
Your medical work here,
the fight you're taking on.
What you're doing
will get a lot of attention.
The fact you have to do it
because no one else wants to.
Lin, I think what you're doing is amazing,
but real change needs political will.
The easiest way to get that
is by putting you on the front page.
No. No way.
- Fuck that.
- Ah.
I can't, Kavita. I'm sorry.
W... How about I talk
to some of the patients, you know?
Get some pictures of you at work.
- H-Hey! [Scoffs]
- There is no story, all right?
You're gonna ruin everything.
What the fuck, man?
[stammers]
Am I clear?
Be clearer if you told me why.
Why don't you want this story told?
It's nothing. Really. I'm...
I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that.
If there's any...
If there's any damage, I'll pay...
[chuckles] Don't worry about it.
No, Kavita.
Kavita.
[Lin] My heart was pounding
as I realized how fragile my freedom was.
Just one photograph out in the world
could send me straight back to prison.
[Prabhu puffs]
Parvati.
Pa… [chuckles]
[singsongy] Parvati, oh, Parvati,
oh, meri Parvati.
- Hey. [Sighs]
- [vocalizes]
[Prabhu coughs]
Please do not ruin my happy thoughts, huh?
Your face is very… [stammers]
Children will cry
if they look at this face.
[sighs]
It's been a bit of a day, Prabhu, mate.
Seems I can't get things right
for getting them wrong.
[speaks Hindi]
[sighs]
[in English] I love her too much, Linbaba.
- [chuckles]
- You're making me jealous.
Yeah, well, I am jealous of that big, fat
envelope of money Qasimbhai is giving you.
I'm sick about it.
Okay. Then, uh, to feel better about it,
why don't you, you know, roll around
on your big bed of money, Linbaba?
Prabhu, the whole jhopadpatti
has been chipping in
'cause they think I'm spending my money
on the medicine.
If not you, then who?
Khaderbhai's been paying.
Okay, very bad. Very bad, very...
Lin... Lin, you must never tell anyone,
or Qasimbhai will tell you
to leave Sagar Wada.
Look, that money should go
back to the people.
No.
That will only get you in more trouble.
The people love you, they need you,
they want you to have it. Please, Linbaba.
Just keep your head down
and money in your pocket, boss.
- It's a lie.
- Not a lie. Just a…
[both, chuckling] Not telling.
With consequences you must deal with.
And the consequences are
everyone stays happy,
and you must live with too much money.
[Lin grunts, sighs]
Why don't you take some of that food
to Parvati…
- [chuckles]
- …and say hello?
Please, Lin. Her family do not need
any more reason to hate me.
An unmarried woman
cannot be talking to a...
Mmm, handsome, unmarried fellow like me,
alone in the beautiful dark of the night.
Huh?
Same reason you are sleeping here tonight.
So many rules.
Can't be alone with another man's wife
or with a woman who's nobody's wife
or with any woman, pretty much.
I'm surprised
there are so many kids around here.
Ah. [Chuckles]
I'm not saying spend the night.
Just go say hello.
It is not possible, Linbaba.
Parvati is alone, and I cannot be with her
even though I desire her very much.
Instead, I'm sharing my tiny hut with you.
But Karla Ma'am is alone,
and there are no rules stopping you.
And you are jealous of me?
I am the one
who cannot have sexy time tonight
because of this situation.
Now I'm confused.
Are you telling me to go get laid
or do you wanna be alone to masturbate?
All friends here, Linbaba.
I don't mind if I'm alone or not.
[chuckles]
Then I definitely have
somewhere else to be.
[guard] Lin Ford at the gate, sir.
[in Hindi] You should leave.
[in English] Don't let Lin see you.
We'll finish this later.
- Khaderbhai.
- [chuckles]
- Do you play?
- Uh, no, I have no idea what that is.
[chuckles] Pachisi. I will teach you.
Uh, some other time maybe.
Look, everything you've done
has been appreciated, Khaderbhai,
but I'm gonna have to insist on
paying you back.
Paying my own way from now on.
Did someone send you here to tell me this?
No. No, they didn't need to.
Sagar Wada has its own rules,
and if I'm gonna live there,
they have to be my rules too.
What rule do they have
except to grovel and wallow in shit?
[scoffs]
Their only rule is
that they're happy to suffer.
There's more than one kind of suffering,
Abdullah.
The one we feel
and the one we cause others to feel.
You don't have to suffer anything
if you're strong enough to deny it.
Well, maybe true strength is suffering
for others when you don't have to.
Mr. Lin came here to make his life harder.
Do you think him weak?
No. But though I count him as a brother,
he's a crazy Westerner,
and the rules don't count for him.
A suffering can be a kind of anger.
We rage against injustice and unfairness,
and some men feel compelled
to bear this suffering
no matter the consequences.
Such a man is only truly happy
when he is suffering for others.
The hero's curse.
You've done it now.
This discussion will last a long time.
Better you take the money and go.
I'm afraid I can't do that.
And I respect your decision.
My interest is only in being a help to you
in Sagar Wada.
And if I can ever be a help to you again,
my door is always open.
- Thank you, Khaderbhai.
- I enjoy our conversations, Lin.
I hope we can maintain
our friendship at least.
Nothing I'd like more.
[Khaderbhai] Good.
[janitor] My saab will be coming soon.
Lindsay.
[Lin] Did you know that
it's practically illegal in the Sagar Wada
for a man to be alone with
an unmarried woman in the dead of night?
[chuckles]
What are you doing here?
I missed you.
Why did you let me in?
[Nandita, Parvati speaking Hindi]
[in Marathi] Come inside.
[speaks Marathi]
Let's go. I've come to take you home.
[Parvati clicks tongue]
[in Hindi] I can't leave her tonight.
This is not your job.
The shop is your business.
There is only one road
out of our difficulties, Parvati!
Parvati.
Everything you're doing for the clinic…
Is at the expense
of your own flesh and blood.
I don't do this for the clinic.
I do this for me.
[sighs]
[in English]
I'm getting the Lewis Carrolls.
[Lin, imitating the Mad Hatter]
"Oh, you're mad. Bonkers.
Completely off your head.
But I'll tell you a secret.
All the best people are."
Ah, very good, Lin. Too smart by half.
[sighs]
Is you being here going to make
one of those pretty slum girls jealous?
[normal voice] What?
[clicks tongue] No.
[chuckles]
I should stop listening to Didier.
Thinks the only reason
you would stay in a slum is sex.
What, not even love? Just sex?
I hate love.
[chuckling]
You c... You can't hate love, Karla.
Why not?
It's such an arrogance to love someone
and to expect it in return.
I think heaven is a place
where everybody is happy
because nobody has to love
anyone else ever again.
So if love's no good…
What is?
Power. It's the opposite of love.
- You're a fucking savage.
- [both chuckling]
So, why are you here in Bombay
in the first place?
The original sin.
I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
Then don't tell me.
Maybe I wanna tell you.
Maybe I wanna tell someone the truth.
Someone I trust.
Someone I think could be a friend.
Are we friends?
I let you in, against my better judgment.
[Lin groans] Okay.
[both chuckling]
I was addicted to heroin.
I needed money, so I robbed a bank.
A cop got killed,
not by me, but I played my part.
And they put me away.
And then I escaped…
And ran as fast
and as hard as I could to here.
Why here?
I always wanted to come.
It's what the money
was supposed to be for.
So I convinced myself I could come anyway.
Leave all the rest behind.
Take that information
to any cop in Bombay.
There's probably a reward in it.
[chuckles]
So now we have to be friends.
My life is in your hands.
["Love and Affection" playing]
- [both chuckle]
- [phone rings]
[Nishant] Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm.
- Don't. Don't. D...
- Mm-hmm. [Chuckles]
[clerk]
Is this St. Hilda's Hospital, Bombay?
This is St. Hilda's.
- Is this Usha?
- Yes.
It's Susan Reeves
from the passport office in Auckland.
I ran the passport number.
You're sure you gave me the right one?
Uh, R 22624-788. Lindsay Ford.
He's still in a coma,
and it doesn't look good.
The least we can do is find his family
and tell them he's not coming home.
I'm sure they know, love.
Lindsay Ford's been dead for six years.
If you don't mind holding a minute,
my supervisor would like a word.
Of course.
He's using a dead man's passport.
["Midnight Lullaby" playing]
When I was 12, my father shot himself.
I found him.
Brains all over
a pile of bankruptcy forms.
I grew up rich, certain of two things.
I wanted for nothing,
and my father loved me more than anything.
Turned out I was wrong on both counts.
And during everything that came after,
the thing I could never get past
was why wasn't I enough
for him to live for?
I was complacent in my love for him
and in my assumption
that he loved me most.
He didn't.
He loved who and what he was
and what people thought of him.
I used to cry myself to sleep
at whatever relative's house
I'd been shunted to,
and ask why he couldn't have
just stayed for me…
He couldn't have just loved me
and that be enough?
That wasn't your fault.
[sighs] I know that.
Guilt's your thing, not mine.
I blamed him for throwing my love away.
And blame's harder than guilt.
And also easier.
If you assume the worst of everyone,
it's easy not to get close.
You asked what I want.
I never wanna be dependent
on anybody else again.
That's it.
[chuckles]
Sounds lonely.
"They fuck you up, your mom and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do."
[chuckles]
"They fill you with the faults they had."
[both] "And add some extra, just for you."
[chuckles]
You know, last time
I was out after curfew with you…
I got chased by the cops.
Then I guess you better stay,
if you'd like.
I can't.
You could.
It's not that simple.
[Lin sighs]
The couch is all yours.
[sighs]