Sex and the City (1998–2004): Season 4, Episode 7 - Time and Punishment - full transcript

Once Aidan and I were back together,

it seemed nothing had happened
to break us apart.

It's me. Go ahead.

Hey, kid. What's shaking?
I'm back in town. Call me, baby.

I'm not...

A little machine
with a big message.

- Something happened.
- Something bad?

Big called while Aidan and l
were making love.

Something bad.

- The machine picked up.
- What did you do?

Nothing.
We just kept making love.



He could keep going after that?
He's a keeper.

- Never mind him. How did you do?
- I finished.

I had to. I haven't worked that hard
since my SATs.

This is awful.
Did you talk about it?

No. We just went to sleep.

When I woke up, Aidan was
on the other side of the bed.

Usually he sleeps next to me,
right here.

- And I just get in his little nook.
- Maybe he's sleeping differently.

Or maybe he'll never forget
what happened.

Every time the phone rings
he'll think it's Big starting affair two.

That's a big maybe.

I was hoping we could start fresh.
Now we'll have to talk about it.

You're going to explain about Big?

Unless Hallmark makes
a "Sorry I cheated" card.



No one wants to hear about
their lover's past lovers. Leave it.

It's on my answering machine.
I have to talk about it.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

- Can I change the subject?
- I'll pay you a million dollars.

- I'm thinking about quitting my job.
- Did you get a better offer?

No, I mean stopping working.
Altogether.

Really?

I've been driving myself crazy
trying to get everything done

- and Trey suggested...
- Trey suggested?

He mentioned
that maybe I might quit.

I have been driving myself crazy.
And for what? The gallery?

What has the gallery
ever done for me?

- But you love your job.
- I know.

But there's much more
I could do with my life.

Like what?

Soon I'll be pregnant.
That'll be huge.

I'm redecorating the apartment
and I want to learn lndian cooking.

Sometimes I walk by one of those
Color Me Mine pottery places

and I'll see a woman having
a lovely afternoon glazing a bowl.

That would be a nice change.

And I wanted to volunteer
at Trey's hospital,

raise money for the paediatric
AlDS wing.

The cooking and AlDS stuff is great,

but Color Me Mine?

If I was walking by
and saw you in there,

I'd just keep on walking.

Anyway, that's what I'm thinking.

You're not just having
a bad workweek?

No, that's not it.

I'm quitting. That's what I want to do.
I'm quitting.

Be damn sure before
you get off the Ferris wheel,

because the women waiting to get on
are 22, perky and ruthless.

You seem to have
a lot of opinions today.

I'm telling you.
Just forget it ever happened.

Later, I got to thinking about relationships
and partial lobotomies,

two different ideas that might be
perfect together

Iike chocolate and peanut butter.

Think how much easier it would be
if there was some surgical procedure

to whisk away all the ugly memories
and mistakes

and leave only the fun trips
and special holidays.

But until that day arrives,
what to do?

Rely on the same old philosophy
of forgive and forget?

Even if a couple can manage
the forgiveness,

has any ever really conquered
the forgetness?

Can you ever really forgive,
if you can't forget?

To Samantha Jones,
some things were unforgivable.

Taking someone else's cab
was at the top of her list.

- I was here first!
- Sorry!

I don't think so. Get out!

I'm not getting out.

West 12th and 9th Avenue, please.
I hope you enjoy the ride.

He did.

And in a far less friendly bed uptown,

I was even farther from the nook.

I still wasn't sure.
Maybe I was overreacting.

- 8:10. I've got to get to the gym.
- You don't have to go right now.

- You want me to get all soft again?
- I liked you all soft.

I didn't.

Give me a good-morning kiss.

You might want to brush
your teeth first.

That settled it.
He wasn't forgiving or forgetting.

Speaking of not forgetting...

- You were so judgmental yesterday.
- Excuse me?

- You think I'm one of those women!
- One of what women?

One of those we hate,
who just works till she gets married.

- It's 8:15.
- That's not a response!

It's an 8.15 am response.

The women's movement
is supposed to be about choice.

If I choose to quit my job,
that is my choice.

The women's movement?
I haven't even had coffee yet.

It's my life and my choice!

Charlotte, this isn't about me.
This is your stuff.

Admit it!
You're being judgmental!

I'm dripping all over,
and you're calling my judgmental.

If you have a problem quitting your job,
take it up with your husband.

See! "Your husband!"

There's nothing wrong
with having a husband.

I'm hanging up.

Don't you dare!
And stop saying "Charlotte" like that.

I am quitting my job
to make my life better

and do something worthwhile
like have a baby and cure AlDS.

You're going to cure AlDS?

Good for you.
Just don't be disappointed

if all you wind up with is a ceramic mug
with Trey's name on it.

Take that back!

Don't you dare hang up!
I'm interviewing for my replacement.

- I need you to get behind my choice.
- You get behind your choice.

I am behind my choice!
I choose my choice!

I don't have time for this.
I have to go to work.

- Some of us still have to work.
- I choose my choice!

Fuck! Jesus!

When in a hostile situation,

some women, like Charlotte,
confront it head on.

While others...

Fresh juice?

- Where did you get that?
- I ran down to the Korean.

- Dressed like that?
- It caused quite a stir.

Will you help me patch up, buddy?

I got a big tense meeting
with my editor in an hour.

This feels like a two-patch day.

Notice how much better I'm doing
this time? No cheating.

I think I finally kicked
that bad habit.

Now I'm practically perfect,
don't you think?

That kind of hurt.
What was that?

I was making sure
it was on good and tight.

- Are you mad at me?
- Why would I be mad at you?

Excuse me.

- About the other night.
- What the fuck...?

This goddamn milk is bad.
You just let it sit in there?

It's not you. I'm just a little pissed off
because of work.

I got to strip these pieces.
The chemicals are toxic.

- There's no one to watch Pete.
- I'll watch Pete.

Dog walking's not your favourite
thing to do, Carrie.

You love Pete, I love Pete.
That's just the kind of girlfriend I am.

How about I take my tall drink of water
out to dinner tonight?

Some place super nice,
where the milk is fresh.

I'm meeting some buddies
at Steve's bar.

Is it a night with the guys
or can girlfriends crash?

You can come. Don't come.
Whatever. Do what you like.

You go have fun with the guys.

My neck is out. Charlotte called
and I was drying my hair.

My body is fucked up
because of the marathon.

I'm sorry. Can I help?

I don't know.
It hurts to even hold the phone.

Come over.

- I have a...
- Thanks!

Shit!

Miranda's neck is out.

I'm worried that it's too late
for me to cancel my meeting.

I'll check on Miranda for you.

- You would?
- Sure.

Thank you.

You are a great, great boyfriend.
You know that?

I mean it. You're the best.

Where's your keys?

20 minutes later, Miranda's neck
had gone from bad to worse.

- Carrie?
- It's Aidan. Carrie sent me.

No, don't come in.
I'm naked.

What? Jesus!

My neck pulled again and this is
the only way I felt comfortable.

I'll get up.

- Don't get up, I'm coming in.
- No! Don't come in! I'm fine.

- I can't get up.
- OK, I'm coming in.

- I am mortified.
- Relax. I'm looking the other way.

- I'll lift you up.
- You'll see everything.

Nothing I haven't seen before.

Nice smell.
That's the April-fresh stuff?

Are you ready to be lifted?
Here we go.

All right, put your... There you go.

All right.

Let's get you up.
On three. One, two, three.

- How you doing?
- I'm fine.

Snug as a bug in a rug.

Samantha was right.

Every aspiring "gallerina" in New York
wanted Charlotte's job.

She was determined to find
the perfect replacement.

Someone bright, someone smart,
someone like Charlotte.

BA in Art History, minor in Finance.
Same as me.

"Career objectives:
to own my own gallery."

That is amazing. I had the same
objective on my first r?sum?.

- Did you ever own one?
- No.

I found I loved it here so much
that it felt like my gallery.

You've done an amazing job.
It's my favourite space.

I shouldn't tell you this
with a line of people out there,

- but you're hired.
- I am?

Thank you, thank you!

- Do you have any questions?
- Just one.

Why are you leaving
this fantastic job?

I'm married
and we're planning on a baby.

Also, I'm on the board of the Lenox
Hill Paediatric AlDS Foundation.

Charlotte heard herself lie.

She couldn't bring herself to say
her new r?sum? objective would read:

"Wife, mother
and part-time bowl glazer."

That night, I decided to interrupt
guys' night

to give Aidan a quick "Thank you
for helping Miranda" kiss.

- You're my hero.
- What's new, pussycat?

Not only are you great to me,

but you're great to my friends
as well.

Who's a better boyfriend than you?

- I'm back! Where were we?
- I was up to three peanuts.

You think you're hot stuff?

Peanuts?

Shayna's teaching me to play jacks
with peanuts. I'm at threesies.

Hi, I'm Carrie.

Carrie, hi.

I'm sorry. That's Shayna.

- Can I get you a drink?
- No, thanks. I'm not staying.

I don't want to interrupt
the night with the guys.

So where are the guys?

The guys blew me off so I came
to hang out with my buddy Steve.

And Steve... I'm sorry...

Where's Steve?

He went to get a burrito. Shayna and l
are looking out for the joint.

All right, I'm up. Twosies.

- Twosies!
- Look out!

- That was good.
- That was very good.

Miranda says that you were amazing.

He helped my girlfriend.
Took her to the chiropractor.

- You got us a nice guy here.
- Shucks, ma'am!

So how was Miranda?

No work or running for a week.
She has to wear a foam collar.

- What do you call four?
- Foursies.

I'm going to go.

- Can you excuse us for a second?
- Sure.

- What is going on?
- What's up?

You tell me.

You do your thing.

I don't have to work tomorrow.

- Come over if you want.
- I'll come over.

Good luck with foursies.

Nice to meet you, Shayna.

I'll see you later.

Let's go.

Watch and learn, young buck.

But Aidan never showed up.

And at about 3:00 am, it became
very clear that I was being punished

for my big mistake.

That cowl-neck look
is on the way out.

- How are you, sweetie?
- I slept sitting up like the Elephant Man.

- I brought you bagels to cheer you up.
- That's so nice of you!

Aidan never came over last night.
He said he would, but he didn't.

When I called him this morning,

he said he thought "come over"
meant today, not last night.

- This is bullshit.
- That's what I think.

No, you! You are bullshit!

Your bullshit cheer-me-up
bagels are a decoy

so you can talk about Aidan.
You didn't even bring cream cheese.

I got the good bagels.

It's bad enough you send your boyfriend,
but now the bullshit bagels!

- So you don't want one?
- If you fell,

I would never send
my boyfriend to help you.

Yes, I know I don't have a boyfriend.

What's the problem?
Aidan's better in a crisis than I am.

I can't even remember cream cheese.

He saw me naked. Your boyfriend saw
me naked on the floor on a bath mat!

- Did he tell you that?
- No, he's a gentleman.

Well, he did!

I get it. I'm sorry.

I will never send a boyfriend
to do my job again.

Do you want toasted?

If I still even have a boyfriend.

He's having an affair
with a waitress at Scout.

You cheating on him
does not mean he'd cheat on you.

I'm going to burn your bagel.

- It's just a matter of time.
- He's not having an affair.

He's not like that.

He's the good guy
and I'm the bad guy.

The bad guy just has to take it, right?

You should have seen the way
he was acting. He's torturing me.

And I deserve it.

- I deserve it, right?
- I'd shrug, but it hurts.

Got any jelly?

I wish I knew the name of that cab driver.
I'd send him a bottle of wine.

That was really great.

You're a wild man.

Speaking of wild,

it's getting too wild down there.
Might be time for a wax.

See you soon.

It's my week between waxes and this
asshole thinks I'm George of the Jungle!

You should see his bush.
I need a weed whacker to find his dick.

Please keep it down.
We're on the Upper East Side.

Men! We have to run to Helga
the hot waxer, but them?

How would they like it if we told
them to shape their hedge?

Plant their bulbs?
We are talking about gardening?

- Don't start me on his back hair!
- Wait a second. Pete has to go.

This is lovely.
Why are you even walking this mongrel?

I'm proving to my boyfriend
I am trustworthy, loving and kindly.

Do not take your anger out on Pete.

Watching his dog take a dump
will make the memory of Big fade?

- Couldn't hurt.
- Come on! The dog, the waitress.

I don't know that anything happened.

- How long will you punish yourself?
- Until I'm back in the nook.

You may never get back in the nook.

Don't say that.
I know it's true, but don't say it.

I'm not a dog expert,
but is that normal?

He's got the runs!

- Poor Pete.
- Poor me!

He must be sick or something.

I love you,
but this is not my scene.

You're not going to just leave me here?

Sweetie, you're not done yet.

- Pick up after your dog.
- He's not my dog.

I wondered just how much shit I was
willing to put up with for my mistake.

Pete's poo-poo platter
continued for so many blocks

I got worried and took him home.

Your dog got sick.
I'm leaving. Taxi!

Will you hold this?
Carrie, stop!

- What are you doing?
- Toxic chemicals?

I'm taking a break.

She just happened
to be there with coffee?

- I diapered your dog!
- Keep your voice down.

- What are you doing?
- Nothing. We're friends.

Why don't you just fuck her?
Then we can both be bad.

Nothing happened.

I thought about it.

- Do you want to come in?
- I'm too pissed to come in.

I hate that he calls here.

Nothing's happening.
Or will ever happen.

You have to know that.
I would never do that to you again.

Never.

I don't want you to see him
ever again.

I can't do that.

He's in my life.

Not the same way you are.
But he is.

Aidan, you can't keep punishing me.

And I can't keep punishing me.

I made a mistake and I am sorry.

I know you can't forget
what happened,

but I hope that you can forgive me.

You have to forgive me.

You have to forgive me.

You have to forgive me!

You have to forgive me, Aidan.

You have to forgive me.

You have to forgive me!

You have to forgive me.

You had a lot of nerve
telling me to get a wax.

If you were in Aruba,
the natives could bead your back.

It's not just there. Every time
I blow you, I feel like I'm flossing.

I'm sorry, baby.

Is there anything I can do
to make you forgive me?

Samantha forgave and Brad got
a lesson he never forgot.

Look how much bigger
my dick looks!

Soon Charlotte's last day came.

- Seven should go on the north wall.
- It's better on the south.

You're 22.
What do you know about life?

I mean, art. I'm sorry.

I'm just freaked out.

This is a big transition in my life.

If it's any consolation,

my mother worked. It would have been
nice to have her home.

- Don't forget the alarms.
- You're not finishing the day?

I think I'm done.

Good luck.

Charlotte left her past
to pursue her new life objectives.

Be a good mother, cure AlDS...

...and prove Miranda wrong.

You'd better move my meetings
to the end of the week. I'm not 100%.

Still wearing the brace.

For the first time in her life,

Miranda learned the joys of cooking
and of not working.

She'd have to go back eventually,
just to prove Charlotte wrong.

As for Aidan, he and I weren't
quite back to where we were.

We might never be there again.

But we were in a new place,
a more honest place.

And somehow, over time, I had made
my way back into the nook.